Blair steps onto the sidewalk outside Georgina's club and blinks in the sunlight. Everything around her looks faded in the brightness, and it takes her a moment to figure out which way the town car is parked. She pulls her cell phone out of her clutch and squints at the screen, trying to see if she's missed a call while talking to Georgina, but she can't see anything because of the glare from the sun.

She's tired.

The weariness feels like it's found its way to the very center of her bones and all Blair wants to do is go home, wherever that is, and crawl into bed and finally let go of everything she's been carrying around. Her eyelids droop from exhaustion and she starts toward the car which is parked down the block. Step by step she makes her way down the sidewalk, feeling heavy and tired, and finally she pulls the door open and almost falls back into the leather seat.

Blair sighs.

She'll go tomorrow. Another plane ride to California, another knock on Dan's door, and when she thinks about how his arms will feel around her, Blair smiles. She's going home. But right now she's going back to Serena and Nates and she's going to crawl into the comfortable guest bed and sleep.

Her phone jumps and buzzes and Blair remembers that she was trying to see if anyone from the office had called her. Work is never far away and even though she's supposed to be on vacation, her assistant has managed to call her at least once every day with some crisis or another that they need to resolve with her help. She picks up the phone and scrolls to the list of calls she missed. That's when Blair's heart stops.

It's not a Paris number.

She recognizes area code. It's the same area code she would wait for every night, the same area code that would make her heart pound a little when she saw it on the caller ID. The area code, it's a California area code.

Dan.

Her hand trembles a little.

Dan.

It's like he can read the rhythm of her heart as it beats a tattoo for him, calling him to her, and
Blair closes her eyes briefly, his name still on her lips. She wants to dial the number, to tell him in rushed sentences, stumbling over words, that she's done. She's done with the past, done with regret, done with all of this pain between them. Blair has realized after talking to Georgina that whatever is between herself and Dan is of their own construct, and just as they've created it, they can tear it down too. She wants to tell him all of this, but she holds herself back, sees the icon that says there's a voicemail, makes her shaking fingers dial it, hoping she won't cry when she hears his voice.

Blair punches in her voicemail code and listens to the message. Her eyes widen in surprise.

"Hey Blair, it's me. Eric. I love you and Dan, but your husband is driving me crazy. Can't you two figure this out? Maybe you can call him. Love you both. Now, save me from the Humphrey mope."

Eric ends the message with a laugh. Blair thinks she's officially been pulled into an intervention without her consent. Or maybe the intervention is meant for her. Yet another person to call her an idiot, to tell her this thing she and Dan are stuck in isn't worth it. Blair dials the number on her caller ID.

"Blair."

She smiles when Eric picks up immediately.

"Hey Eric," she says warmly. Blair has always had a soft spot for Serena's little brother, and she knows he's been a good friend to Dan through the years.

"I'm sorry to be so blunt, but what the fuck is wrong with you and your husband."

Blair's eyes widen. It's almost the same question leveled at her by Georgina. Why are they doing this to each other. Why does the past have to weigh so heavily on the future.

"It's complicated." she manages to stammer lamely.

"Dude, it's not really complicated. No more than the two of you are making it. I think getting married has made you overly susceptible to the classic Humphrey Overthink, because this is ridiculous."

She smiles.

"I agree."

Eric starts to stay something then stops.

"What?"

"I agree." Blair repeats. "It's ridiculous. I've had a very interesting talk with someone who made that very clear to me."

"Who," Eric asks.

"Georgina Sparks." Blair says. "I just spent an hour with her at her club..."

"Oh, Sparkles! They have a great guys-only night..."

"Not really the point, but yes, it seems Georgina has made quite a business for herself."

"And she changed your mind about this idiocy?"

"Yes."

It took Georgina and all her bluntness to make things clear to Blair. No one else was willing to rip the bandaid off the truth. Georgie didn't mind the pain it would cause. She was willing to inflict the pain that was needed.

"And I'm coming there," Blair says quickly. "Tomorrow. I'll be there tomorrow."

"Uh, Blair,"

"I'll take my mopey, heartbroken husband off your hands because I know I can make this all better."

"Well, um..."

"So, no worries. Your bachelor pad will be back soon."

"Wait, Blair."

She's about to hang up but Blair stops and asks what he wants.

"Um, Dan. He's not here."

Blair freezes.

"He's not there?"

"He left this morning. We had a heart to heart and I told him that he's being an idiot and he was gone when I got up."

Blair's heart, which had been buoyed up by hope, sank like a stone. Everything had been so hopeful a moment ago, and for the first time in a long time she could see everything clearly, and their entire future lay in front of her. Now a curtain dropped down over it and she was again unable to see anything but darkness. Dan had left. Dan was always leaving. It was like he was punishing her over and over again for leaving him fifteen years ago. Blair's hand clenched into fists and she feels the anger welling up.

"Blair?" Eric's voice crackles on the other end of the phone. "I thought...well, he's not picking up his phone, and I thought maybe he would if you called him."

"Maybe." Maybe not. Maybe he'll never speak to her again. Blair feels the tears start up again and she wonders if there will ever be a time when she's not moments away from crying. Goddammit, Dan. She'd just figured it out and now he's not there.

They make casual chit chat for a few more minutes, Eric telling how much he loves living in Laguna Beach and Blair winces with pain as she remembers how she loved being there too; the ocean, Dan's lips on her skin, and a memory that should be good is instead painful. She needs to stop hurting. Finally Blair says goodbye and Eric tells her to kiss his niece for him, and Blair thinks a little Gracie goodness might be what she needs right now to feel better, a snuggle with a sweet baby. She tells the driver to head back to the Archibald apartment and settles back into the leather seat, her body sagging, her heart tired.

Serena is standing in the living room when Blair drags herself into the apartment, Gracie balanced on her hip, and the baby coos when she sees Blair and smiles. Blair smiles back, and it's the first genuine gesture she's made all day, the first one that feels real, and for a moment the innocence and sweetness of that baby washes over her and she feels a little bit better.

"Oh, B." Serena sighs, obviously reading the defeat and sorrow on Blair's face. She hands Grace to a nanny who has been sitting nearby then walks up to Blair and takes her into her arms. Blair sinks into her friend's embrace, letting Serena take some of her burden, letting someone hold her up for just a few minutes.

"I'm so sorry," Serena whispers over and over again, her hand running up and down Blair's back, and Blair is sorry too. She'd finally figured it out and it's too late now. Dan is gone.

"I love him." Blair whispers, feeling relieved to tell someone. She will never stop loving him. But his words echo in his head, that sometimes love simply isn't enough. How have they gotten to that point so quickly. They were newlyweds not that long ago. Now there is an unbreachable distance between them.

"I know, B." Serena coos, rocking Blair a little, in the same way she might rock Grace after a big cry, and Blair feels safe and loved. "I know."

After a long time the two women break apart and Blair wipes at the tears in her eyes, sniffs a little and smiles. This is her life. She has picked up the pieces before and it's time to pick them up again. She has good friends. She has her business. Maybe she wasn't meant to have everything. Maybe love will elude her forever.

Serena smiles. She traces Blair's cheek with a finger, wiping away a tear that managed to escape Blair's efforts.

"Maybe it's not that bad." Serena says and Blair wants to snap at her that having hope isn't helpful. Instead she smiles wanly.

"It's that bad." Blair says quietly. "I can't keep lying to myself."

Serena squeezes her hand and the two of them walk toward the stairway leading to the rooms upstairs. Blair just wants to sleep, but not quite yet.

"Oh," Serena says, "I almost forgot. Dorota called."

Suddenly Blair doesn't want to be there. She wants to go home, to the penthouse, to Dorota. She'll make her tea and brush her hair off her forehead in a way Blair's mother never did, and put out her favorite nightgown. Suddenly she wants her old bed and all the comforts of home, or what used to be home. Where she grew up, except that Blair feels like she's grown up more in the past two years, since Dan came back into her life, then she did when she was young and trying to figure things out.

"What did she want?" Blair asks.

"She asked if you could come by this afternoon." Serena answers.

Somehow Dorota knows. She knows Blair needs her.

"I think I'm going to stay the night at the penthouse," Blair tells Serena. Her friend gets a look of understanding and pity on her face, tells her that Grace will miss her and this makes Blair smile. She'll miss Gracie too, but tonight she needs to find a way to salve the wound that has been made on her soul. Tonight she needs to be home, or somewhere that's the closest to home she's ever had.

Blair packs her bag and calls the car. It's a short ride to the penthouse. As she walks through the lobby Blair thinks that she might ask Dorota for some of her homemade hot chocolate. She's ready to fall into bed, into a dreamless sleep. She gets into the elevator, staring at the doors as it goes up to the top floor. The doors slide open and Blair steps into the familiar foyer to find Dorota waiting for her, wringing her hands, talking a mile a minute.

"Miss Blair. I'm so sorry. I needed to get you here and I thought if I told you why you'd never come, that you'd turn around and leave and I didn't want that to happen, because you both need to stop being such idiots..."

Blair blinks at the world idiot, not hearing the rest of what Dorota said. It seems to be a universal theme from everyone around her. Georgina. Eric. She's sure Serena longs to utter the word. But from Dorota? Her loyal maid, the woman who is practically her mother. Calling Blair an idiot?

"What?" Blair stammers, "What are you going on about?"

Dorota stops and stares at Blair. They say nothing.

"Just come with me." Dorota finally says.

Blair protests. She's tired. She wants to go to bed. Whatever it is can wait until morning. She has a teleconference in the morning. She'll be flying back to Paris tomorrow afternoon. She doesn't need to see whatever Dorota wants to tell her. Really, can't it wait...

"No!" Dorota says firmly, and Blair is a little taken aback. "This cannot wait."

She grabs Blair's hand and drags her toward the living room and when they round the corner into the formally decorated room that still reeks of Eleanor, Blair making a mental note to redecorate soon, Blair stops and stares. She grips Dorota's hand tightly and feels her maid squeezing her hand back.

"I told you it can't wait, Miss Blair." Dorota whispers.

His back is to her. His hair is a little longer and she thinks they haven't been apart that long, have they? He's staring pensively out one of the windows. He doesn't know she's standing behind him and she drinks in his slim figure, his broad shoulders. Blair feels the tension spring from her body, tension she didn't even know she had been carrying until she could finally let it go. She opens her lips and his name slips out, almost against her will.

"Dan!"

He turns at the sound of her voice and starts to say her name but before he can finish it, Blair has let go of Dorota's hand, run across the room and is in his arms, kissing him on the mouth over and over, say his name between kisses.

Dan...Dan...Dan...

He laughs and it rumbles in his chest, and she's so hungry for him, missed him, and he feels so good in her arms, smells so good, and a million other random thoughts collide together, all centered on the man who is in her arms.

"Whoah," Dan mumbles between kisses, "slow down."

Blair doesn't want to slow down. She wants him now, both of them stuck between the past and the future, and she doesn't know what tomorrow will bring, just that he's here with her and she's not going to let him go. She tells him this.

"I can't let you go," Blair whispers, her forehead touching his, her chest heaving, words tumbling out. "Not now. Not when I've missed you so much. Not when there's so much I need to say, to tell you, not now, not..."

"Blair," Dan stops her talking with a finger on her lips. "You don't have to." he says, bending his head and kissing the tip of her nose, her cheek. Blair closes her eyes. "I'm not going anywhere."

Her heart soars again with his words. He's here. He's staying. She searches his eyes and there's nothing but love. No pain. No betrayal. They are open and loving and she thinks she could drown in their deepness. Blair kisses him again, this time slowly and sweetly, tongues mingling, and hunger zips up Blair's spine like a shot of electricity, and she knows there's nothing to talk about at the moment.

TBC