Update: I didn't even finish this story and it's been over a year I am a terrible person so you know what I'm finishing it. If you remember me I so sorry if you don't and are new, I should have the next chapter up soon. Until then, please enjoy a mini story about Mapleshade the elf cat. This is more of an inner monologue and I hope it's amusing none the less. I'm still getting back into the swing of things, so please be patient! Leave your comments, compliments, and rants in the review section. If you hate me for not updating I don't blame you, I hate me to for it. On the upside during my break I did take some time to improve my writing a bit. Hopefully this isn't a total cringe fest for you. My left eye is still twitching from all that cringing I did when I read some of my older writings. Enjoy!
Mapleshade narrowed her eyes at a small white kit. The kit was bouncy and bright and active and Mapleshade absolutely hated it. She cringed at the sight of the joy twinkling in the kit's eyes. How revolting! And did you see the way the queen looked on fondly in pride? Mapleshade would've hurled if it wasn't for Tigerstar's persistance in this ridiculous quest. To be honest, Mapleshade still was unsure what was going on. All she knew was that she had to lead kits to Tigerstar so he could do his 'Ho ho ho' and 'what do you want for Christmas?' thing. More like 'Wo-ah-ah back the flap jack frick frack up before I deck the dens with your flesh you piece of insolent fox dung'. It was all she could do to keep her claws sheathed and a not so murderous look on her face as she fulfilled her duty.
You know what didn't help? The hats. They were sparkly, red, green, monstrosities to dignity of any cat. Want to know the absolute worst part? They jingled. Every paw step Mapleshade took there was a jingle bell chime sound as the hat shifted. A tingling moment of joy perfect for the cheer of the season maybe, but definitely not for Mapleshade's murderous attitude. She swore if she ever got the chance she'd rip the bells off and make dirt all over them. Then maybe she'd give one to a kit as a present, with a death berry inside. THAT was Mapleshade's kind of Christmas. Horror and death, not happiness and good will towards clans. If she had it her way there would be no Santa, no gifts, no joy, and certainly no carols.
Speaking of carols she was one more round of 'StarClan rest ye merry gentlekits' away from strangling Lionblaze with his own microphone. Lionblaze and several other clan toms had come together as a choir to ensure maximum annoyance, I MEAN Christmas cheer. They were all standing on a large tree trunk, arms/legs/? Wrapped around eachother and carton after carton of eggnog strewn about their paws. It was a miracle they could still stand on 4 legs, let alone sing those putrid songs. However Mapleshade wasn't complaining about their beverage. The more they drank the fewer songs there were, which was a bonus for here, but they made the songs drag out by burping or just singing so slowly. She told herself it would all be over soon and she'd have her revenge soon enough. There would be a special place in the Dark Forest for this band of cats, Mapleshade would ensure of that much to say the least.
"Jiiiingle BELCH…. Jingleeeee Bellssss…- UF!" She heard a loud yowl erupt from the tree as the group of toms was toppled over in their own egg nog state of mind. She winced a bit at the microphone screech but didn't turn to watch. She didn't want to see a single whisker. If she did she might just pounce for their throats. Not that she wouldn't have done that otherwise, but now she had a special reason. She allowed her lip to curl up in a twisted smile before turning to the kit.
"Are you ready to meet Santa Claus?" She snarled. The kit let out a terrified squeak and scurried away behind it's mother. Mapleshade let out a soft hiss of contentment. She'd show them all.
"I see you hate this as much as I do." Mapleshade heard a meow a turned to see a disgruntled Jayfeather behind her.
"If you hate this with the passion of a thousand dying suns, then yes." Mapleshade spat, lashing her tail.
"If you hate it that much..." Jayfeather continued making his voice low and almost inaudible. "I have a proposition for you..."
Okay, the end is neigh! Please, in the reviews answer the question of the day: What is your favorite thing about Christmas?
I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and the final installment, along with some much needed announcements will be coming soon!