Chapter 2 Alex
I got another letter from Piper today but I didn't open it I put it in my bedside table with the others I was still pissed and confused and she obviously didn't get what I meant in my last letter when I said don't send anything back. "Fucking Piper" I said under my breath I was so angry it was like a last ditch attempt of her to keep this hold on me but no doubt she's over there crying on that Russian shoulder "O woe is me Alex won't talk to me, Larry left me, I can't do my roots properly in here" I stated pacing up and down in my cell my bunkie was at work so I could vent I kicked the bed side table "Fucking Piper" I kept looking at the table like the letter was saying pick me up and read me you fool but I resisted the urge. I lied in my bunk and was reading the book Kate recommended for me I wonder what she was doing well she couldn't have been doing much she's like a big mystery I wonder how she got here this isn't minimum security so she must have done something bad every now and then I kept looking at the table so this was how Piper felt when I kept sending her letters.
I left to get dinner it was too tempting to read the letters I couldn't see Kate anywhere I saw Ruth and Lyn and I sat on they're table "Hey guys" They both looked at me as a why the fuck is she sat with us look. "If your wondering about Kate she's in the library working"
"Why would I care about where Kate is" I said casually eating my dinner
"Because you've be skulking around her" Ruth stopped eating and gave me a serious look "Look that kid has been through a lot and she doesn't need you fucking her up"
Okay now I was pissed what was she trying to insinuate "Skulking? You for real we both share an interest in literature and amongst other things it doesn't mean we're sneaking off for quickies in the shower" Ruth put her knife and fork down "Did I say I thought something was going on" I fidgeted with my glasses "I have some type on and off again relationship back in Litchfield trust me the last thing I want is another fucked up love triangle" Ruth smirked at me I just wanted to hit that stupid old fucking smug face "She's taken anyway her girlfriend came to visit yesterday which is probably why you didn't see her if you were wondering" I did wonder where she was and I didn't know that she had a girlfriend or that she was gay or bi. I got up and took my tray and whispered in Ruth's ear "I really couldn't give a fucking shit" Ruth looked straight ahead like she wasn't fazed "Keep telling yourself that lurch".
Later that night I couldn't sleep my bunkie was snoring and I kept looking at the table. I couldn't help it I took the letters from the table and read them. She said she couldn't cope with the no contact thing and that she was losing her mind I just felt guilty now I wanted to get back to Litchfield more then ever now. As much I tried to get away from Piper we are both the same people we're both selfish and manipulative. Piper wrote that what she done was selfish but she done it for my own good cause she thought I was going to get killed at lest she has a excuse this time. I must have woke my bunkie up "What's up with you lurch" I ignored her and kept reading the letters over and over my bunkie was sat on her bed looking at me "Can I help you" I said with a sarcastic tone she looked at me and lied back down on her bunk. I had enough I needed to see Piper I went to see my counsellor first thing in the morning I stormed in her office didn't even bother knocking "Is my transfer going to happen any time soon cause it's been awhile" I said instantly. A women sat at her desk rolled her eyes "Name" Seriously she didn't know my fucking name "Vause Alex Vause shouldn't you know this" She just went into a file drawer and looked in it "Yeah it's been received and is being processed"
"Any idea how long that takes"
"I don't know it's in Caputo hands" So basically a long time then "So there's nothing you can do can you call him" She closed my file and put it back "No I can't sorry is there anything else" I walked out of her office. So basically it's all in the Joe's hands and I was hopeful that something would be done quickly but it was doubtful. I don't think I could cope another week in here the only good thing was Kate for company I hated being alone ever since mom died and Piper left but I hoped I made a friend out of Kate she seemed smart and nice I just kept wondering what the hell she did to get here she seemed like how Piper was when I first met her young and innocent but with brunette hair . I went back to my cell to grab the books that Kate recommend to me I had actually read them before but I didn't to say anything to her I turned to my bunkie "Hey you know that Kate that works in the library" She seemed surprised that I even spoke to her I have hardly spoke to her in fact I didn't really know her name "Yes I know nice young girl but she seems to carry dark weight on her shoulders" I put my glasses on head "Yeah she is nice yeah" Nodding my head in agreement "What she in here for"
"Wow she must have done a number on you to make you curious...I don't know there's a lot of rumours about it she's very stubborn about not telling people" I looked at my bunkie and put my glasses on she looked like she'd been here for years she was older then 50 kind of reminded me of Rosa "Thanks" I put the books under my arm and headed for the library.
Kate
I was sat in the visiting room waiting for Helen to turn up when I saw her come through the doors my heart didn't skip like it was meant to I embraced her anyway but it was a awkward hug she leaned in for the kiss but I pecked her cheek just in time. The truth was I haven't been into this relationship in awhile well since I got here 1 year ago "How you doing baby" I hated that question how was I doing? I don't know why it must have been the lack of sleep "O yeah it's fucking great here we get 5 star gourmet food every day" I leaned in "How the fuck do you think I am doing" I sat back in my chair and crossed my arms like some sulky child I couldn't help it in fact I couldn't even look at her and when I did she looked guilty and I felt bad I held her hands on the table "Look listen baby it's my fault I am here and I am going to be here for years" Helen looked like she was going to cry I put my hand on her cheek her face hasn't coped well with the sleepiness nights and the stress her skin felt rough and she just didn't feel like the same person I met 5 years ago and I wouldn't say it was love at first site it was more lust. I'd just came out to my mother who was pretty nasty about the whole thing I am a only child so that's the grand kids out of the window I met Helen in a coffee shop of all places and it kinda went from there and we got stuck in our own way. I think that we both knew where this conversation is going I knew she was hiding something she looked very guilty I took my hand back there's only one thing she could've done "Who is she" She burst into tears "No one it was a one night thing...I was feeling lonely"
"O fucking poor you how would you feel if I hooked up with someone here?" She shrugged her shoulder "I wouldn't mind" That's when I knew that we reached the end of the road because I actually believed her and to be honest I didn't mind either that she spent the night with someone else the women has to get it from somewhere. "Look Hel it's cool I don't mind to be honest I haven't been hot on this relationship for a while" She looked relived like I saved her the next 6 years of bus trips to here and guiltiness but she did look down I gave a big grin grabbed her chin and pulled her head up to look at me "Hey chin up I'll be fine" She gave me a smile "I do still love you...It's just not enough to go through this" To be honest I wouldn't wish a long distance prison relationship on anyone "Hey we can still be friends and you can still write me letters and visit every now and again and when I get out who knows" She nodded I didn't believe that she would send me letters or visit I think she was just happy to get out of it I might get some for about 6 months and it'll probably stop. When Helen left I got this overwhelming sadness of the realisation that I was alone in here my mother never spoke to me my father passed when I was young. Maybe it was time to extend the olive branch and send my mother a letter she didn't even know I was here maybe it was best to do a phone call no a letter then she can't hang up on me. When I went back to work I didn't tell Ruth what happened I just made out everything was normal I didn't want to worry about her "That Alex was looking around for you" Ruth had that sort of tone that she didn't like her "Suppose she'll come back and say hi, What's your problem with her anyway" Ruth carried on working "I just don't like the way she comes in here and thinks she owns the place" And as soon as Ruth said that in walks Alex she gave Ruth a nasty look have they had words that I didn't know about "Okay what's going on with you guys" They just looked at each other "Yeah Ruth what is going on with us" Ruth walked off "Ooooookay seriously what's going on"
"Your friend thinks that I have a thing for you"
I laughed "Seriously what's going on"
"That's the truth" I didn't know where Ruth got that idea from "That's stupid I'll have a word with her" Alex took her glasses off "Nah it's cool I've had my fair share of old hags to deal with" She started walking around with me "So was there a reason you've been looking for me"
"No not really just wanted to return these" She handed me the books "I read them in like 2 days" I chuckled a little Ruth came over "I'm off don't forget the guard comes at 7 to lock up have fun children" She shoot another look at Alex I had some work to do and Alex said she'd wait when I finished she was sat on the floor reading War and Peace I sat next to her "A bit in depth book for this time" She put the book down "Can I ask you a question" I think I knew this would be a personal one "How the fuck did you end up here" Apart from Ruth I haven't told anyone else "I basically done something stupid and now I am paying for it" Alex nudged me "I think everyone here have done something stupid "
"Before I came here I was a youth worker and I got close to this kid friendship wise and he was having problems with this gang I told them to back off and they must have got to him somehow...Hel was away for a weekend and he came round the apartment with a bag he asked me to stash I didn't look I didn't want to know what was in there I just assumed it was weed and money and this stupid fucking gullible idiot done it and he called the cops" I felt like crying but I have cried so much I have noting left I mean I have literally nothing. Alex leaned in "That sucks what was in it" I chuckled "A fucking gun and cocaine, money...I am such a ass wipe" I put my head in my hands Alex put her hand on my arm and pat it she clearly wasn't good at this I put my hands down Alex took her hand away "What about you"
"O just your average dirt poor kid that got into a drugs cartel trade had my heart broken by a straight girl then got caught by the cops and then gave up the straight girl name and then I got put in prison and so did Piper and we started fucking again and then she choose her clueless hapless boyfriend over me that's just breaking it down there's more but I don't want to go in to it's so fucking complicated" I was taken a back by what she said "Wow and I thought I had it bad" I looked over and Alex had her head buried in her knees I put my hand on her back and kept it there Alex looked up "It's just so fucking complicated I mean if I get back to Litch and me and Piper live happy ever after she only has months I have years that's because of her the fucking stupid bitch" I had only know Alex for a few weeks but she always kept this tough exterior up and now it was crashing down I moved my arm around to hers and moved her in for a hug "You can tell me Vause honestly I've heard worse I used to listen to kids problems" She leaned into me "It's nothing that hasn't gone through my head over and fucking over that's why I need to get back to Litch I need to talk to her face to face cause a part of me knows she loves me and what she done was for my best interest but another part of me thinks she done this so she isn't alone in prison I mean what if Larry and Molly Polly don't work out and he starts sniffing around, Piper would have him back in a flash I mean he has things I cant's give her I am not good at anything else apart from moving heroin around" I could hear a faint sobbing in my arm pit "Hey don't cry" She lifted her head up and looked at me her glasses were steamed up I took them off and put my hands on her shoulders "Don't be so down your good at a lot of things your always reading maybe a proof reader write your own novel maybe" She was still looking down eyes still watering "Hey in the few weeks I've known you I think your awesome and cool I mean you have a washed up rock star for a dad" She chuckled and she looked up. I looked in her eyes I was being taken in by those green eyes I still had her glasses and I put them on her I didn't know what was coming over me maybe because I wasn't with Helen any more or maybe I just liked her I moved my hands away she didn't need this and I was being a jerk for doing it. Alex put her hand around my the back of my neck and pulled me in for a kiss.