Thankyou to everyone who read and reviewed my story. Id like to say a special thanks to the guest reviewers who I couldn't thank in person. I hope you all enjoy the last chapter. Thanks again

22nd May continued...

Light footsteps on the wooden floorboards gave me a start, I really must stop falling asleep by the fire.
It was Adam.
"Sorry, I just wanted to get some water," he muttered shyly.
"I'll bring you some warm milk." I hauled myself up.
"No really there's no need."
"Go on, you'll catch your death down here in bare feet. Up you go and don't wake the boys."
Adam stood for a moment, probably considering whether to argue the point with me but he decided against and headed back up the stairs.
I went to his room soon after with a cup of hot milk and a current bun I made earlier. Must air that room out, its smells musty having been shut up for so long.
He took the cup and bun and thanked me. He has his Fathers formal mannerisms.

"So, are we glad to be back?"
I began like that. Give him room to say what he needed to say.

He nodded without much enthusiasm.

"I heard what happened."
He looked directly at me.
"Hoss told ne."
"Hoss has a big mouth." He said, taking a bite from the bun and wincing as it stung his split lip.
"Hoss cares about you a great deal. He missed you terribly."
Adams face darkened at that.
"I found my money" he told me.
"I'll probably be heading off in the morning."
"What happened to your lip." I asked.
"I lost at cards, the other man cheated."
"And you told him so."
Adam nodded reluctantly.
"You're lucky you escaped with an injured lip. Its a dangerous world out there Adam."
"Its a dangerous world in here." He mumbled.

" I spoke at length to Hoss and Joe about it and they told me the beating you took was a once off, your father never acted like that before. Is that true?"

"Yeah, like he does punish me but always in the barn when the boys are in bed and he'd just give you six. He completely lost the plot that day." Adam frowned.

"Can't you forgive him, you can't run from each other forever."

"Yeah but that's not just it, is it.
It should be up to me whether I break horses or not. I'm a man now I should be able to do as I please."

"You say you're a man Adam though you're still acting like a boy. A man cares for the feelings of others. Your father was terrified at the prospect of you coming off one of those wild horses and breaking your neck like his wife did. That's a trauma your pa needs to get over and he will given time. it didn't help with you forcing the issue. A man would be more considerate."

"He shouldn't have tanned me like he did though."

"No you're right, he shouldn't have. that was wrong. But I would say he has regretted that every moment since. He's your Pa Adam, he's also a human being. He makes mistakes. All I know is that since I've been here he has suffered every day in your absence. I know now why he has spent those endless days with the sheriff. He's been out searching for you."

"I don't know if it can ever be the same between us though."

"Its ok to be scared."

"I'm not scared." He told me pointedly.

"No? I think you are. Your father lost control and gave you a severe beating. That would scare anyone. That would make anyone want to run for the hills."

Adam drank his milk, deep in thought for a minute.
"I might talk to him." He said at last.
"That's all I ask."
I reached over and gave him a quick hug. He braced himself as if I was lancing him with a branding iron. Could he really be related to Hoss.
We could hear the door slam downstairs. I squeezed his hand reassuringly and headed out to meet Ben.

He went to the chair by the fireplace and sat down heavily. He squeezed fingers across his eyes trying to dispel the tiredness.

"Mr Cartwright... we have to talk."
"Mrs Jennings I know I'm sorry. Its not in your remit to care for the boys all day and all night. I'll give you the time back I promise, but right now..."
"Its about Adam."
Mr Cartwright was silent for a moment, I pressed on.
"The boys told me what happened. I wanted to hear your version. What were you thinking!"
He looked down at his hands.
"What...what I do with my children is...he wouldn't listen...he...he..."
Much to my dismay tears began to slide down his bristled face. He wiped at them with the back of his hand.
"I don't know what I was thinking." He said at last.
"I just wanted control, I wanted control back. I wanted to lock him away from the horses, the guns, the card games, everything that could hurt him."
"You can't do that Mr Cartwright, he's practically a man."
Everybody I love dies Mrs Jennings. Everybody. If I lost him, that would be the end of everything. I just wanted control."
"You wanted control so you beat him."
"I never meant for that to happen. He wouldn't listen to me."
"So its his fault."
"No, I'm not saying that. I just...I just wanted him to listen to me, to see sense.. After Adam left I told the new Sheriff what had happened. I asked him to find someone to take Hoss and Joe. He wouldn't arrest me."
"Sheriff Coffee is a good man." I nodded.
" He said he would write to you, ask you to help take care of the boys.
I wanted to keep him safe Mrs Jennings, that's all I wanted. I ended up pushing him away, I wanted to keep him safe and all I managed to do was teach him that the biggest thing he has to fear in this world is his own Father."
My arms were around him as he cried out the misery and exhaustion of the last few days. It all came flooding out of him.

"Pa," Adam stood nervously on the bottom step.
Mr Cartwright looked at him as if he were an apparition.
Slowly he left my side and went to his son.
"Adam," he whispered his sons name as a trembling hand reached up and stroked his dark hair.
"I'm sorry pa. I will listen. I will consider your feelings on things in future." Adam mumbled self consciously as he stood before his father.
Ben shook his head.
"No son...no. I'm the one that needs to apologize. What I did was very wrong Adam. Can you forgive me?"
Adam smiled warmly and his father pulled him into an embrace overcome with relief.
It was the first time I had seen him smile. Adam has dimples.

I left them to it then. They had a lot to talk about and some of us have to get up early in the morning. If I don't get up first, little Joe will be in making his own breakfast of cookies and apple peel dipped in sugar. Oh he did that last week. He was bouncing off the walls half the day hyper after it. I'm not going to let that little scamp have the jump on me. Its after midnight. I'm going to sleep. This family is putting grey hairs on my head.

June 30th 1848 ~ one month later.

Ben and Adam are in arguing over some lumber contract or other. Ben is saying that Adam thinks he knows it all but actually it sounds as though Adam is right. But its not for me to say, let them at it. They'll meet in the middle eventually. I came out here onto the porch for a bit of peace. The sun is strong today, very pleasant. Hoss is sitting on my lap. . He's a big boy now, he's getting too old for that. I must discourage it...next year.

The End.