I really though that this would just be a one-shot. Honestly, I did.

This fits in towards the end of season four. It is slightly different to the others and more Tony's point of view than Ziva's, because I thought we should get his side of the story and I was getting a bit stressed with all of the angry Ziva thought patterns. I was actually beginning to think in the same way as I have been writing her.

Plans

He sighed as her body slumped over her desk, exhaustion hitting her like a tidal wave. It had been a tough case for all of them, but she had suffered most. Of course she had – she had trusted the man, believed him. Maybe even started to fall for him. Every time he had seen her with a man she was left heartbroken. Either they would kill, or they would be killed. He pitied her. He may have had a tough ride with love, but at least he had found it, and had it reciprocated. She had no such luck. He looked across to his two other agents. McGee was packing his things away, preparing to head for Abby's lab. DiNozzo was preparing for a date. Or a night in with the mystery woman. His gaze flicked back to Ziva. She had saved him. She had killed her own brother. To save him. And even after almost two years, he was still shocked by that, and so he should be. And that act of saving him left a warm spot in his heart for her. He hated to see her hurt. "DiNozzo, drive Ziva back to her apartment. Make sure she eats something and goes to bed."

"Boss, I've got plans." Tony protested, looking up from his desk to meet Gibbs eyes.

"DiNozzo, tell me one thing, one single thing, more important than making sure your partner is alright. No, more so, tell me one thing more important than making sure that your friend is alright." Gibbs glared.

"I can't get out of these plans, boss…"

"Rule one, DiNozzo."

"Don't keep suspects together? What's that got to do with anything?"

"The other rule one. Never screw over your partner. She's had a bad week." He pointed to the woman, glaring at his senior field agent.

"Right. I can cancel my plans." He nodded and looked at Ziva. He couldn't tell whether she was awake or not. She had her head buried in her arms as they were folded on her desk. Gibbs had a point, there was a very high probability that she had not eaten or slept in a number of days. He pulled his phone out and sent a quick text to Jeanne, blagging an excuse about having to mark papers.

"She keeps her keys to her apartment in…"

"The front pocket of her backpack. I know." He sighed, gently trying to stir Ziva from what appeared to be a deep slumber. Giving up, he slung both his and her bags across his shoulders and scooped her up, one arm hooked under her knees and one arm around her torso. She let out a slight moan before nestling her head onto his shoulder, her warm breath brushing against his skin. He carried her into the elevator and to his car, where he sat her in the passenger seat and buckled the seatbelt in. Sliding into the driver's seat, he drove in silence, his eyes often leaving the road to check she was all right. He pulled up outside their usual Chinese takeaway, hurrying in and ordering their usual assortment of fast food delicacies, what they usually ordered for the whole team, not just the two of them.

"Tony? What are you doing here?" A familiar voice asked from behind him as he placed the food in the boot of his car. He cringed before replacing his expression with a well-rehearsed mask and turning around.

"Jeanne." He smiled. "I needed food. Marking takes up a lot of energy."

"Who is she?" Jeanne nodded to Ziva's sleeping form in the passenger seat of his car, more than just a hint of jealously present in her tone. He paused, deliberating between lies.

"She's an old friend, she turned up on the doorstep of my office this morning after a messy break-up." It wasn't wholly untrue. She was a friend, and she had just had a very messy break-up. Messy in many, many senses of the word.

"Why didn't you just tell me that, not lie to me?"

"I really don't know, it seemed simpler to explain." He shook his head. "I'm just taking her back to her apartment and making sure she eats something and goes to bed. I'm just worried about her, that's all."

"Do you need me to help?" It was almost as if she was saying that whoever this woman was, she couldn't be as important as her. And she was saying that, with the tone of voice she used.

"No, I can handle her on my own. She's a little…explosive." He laughed slightly at his understatement.

"You'll come over when you're done?"

"I really don't know when that will be. It could take a while to get her to eat anything, and then I have to ensure she actually get's to sleep, and once that's done hide anything she could use as a weapon – and she is very creative." He chuckled to himself. Jeanne raised her eyebrows. "I might sleep in her spare room if it get's too late."

"I honestly don't mind you coming over. Even if it's late." Jeanne took his hands in hers and walked closer, pressing her body to him.

"She's had a really rough couple of days and she gets real bad nightmares…" He shook his head, casting his eyes back to Ziva sleeping in his passenger seat.

"And you don't want to leave her? You're a good friend, Tony."

"Yeah, we're good friends." He said quietly, staring into space as he remembered evenings at her apartment, laughing and sharing paperwork.

"Earth to Tony?" Jeanne waved her hand in front of his face and looked worried. "You were off in a daze. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. It's just…She's not the only one who's had a tough day."

"You know where to find me if you need to talk." She smiled and kissed him, running her hands through his hair.

He struggled up the stairs to Ziva's apartment with her fast asleep in his arms, the food in one hand and his other clutching the spare key to her apartment that she had had cut for him and he still kept on his keychain next to the key to Jeanne's apartment. He unlocked the door and awkwardly closed it behind him before gently laying her on her sofa. It had been over four months since he had been there, and she hadn't changed the place a bit. It was identical to the way it had looked the last Friday they had left for breakfast together. He laid out the food on the coffee table before contemplating how best to wake her. Surprisingly, she stirred before he had even decided upon a plan of action, suddenly gasping when she felt someone else's presence in the room. "Hey, sleepyhead."

"Tony? What are you doing here?" She rubbed her eyes. She must be dreaming. He was back at her apartment again, sat opposite her – cross-legged and grinning – like old times.

"Gibbs told me to take you home, make sure you had something to eat and got some sleep." He shrugged and her heart sank. So it was an order. He was not there out of kindness, or friendship, just because Gibbs had ordered him to be there.

"Well, I am not hungry." She shrugged and swung her legs off of the sofa.

"Okay." He shrugged and started eating. "Bu' I 'm" His words were garbled as he stuffed food into his mouth.

"Why do you not take your food home with you then? And stop talking with your mouth full."

"I don't want Gibbs to hit me for not making sure you're ok." He shrugged again.

"I am fine. Now will you leave?"

"Nope, I've started my dinner now." She sighed and slid onto the floor opposite him. Grabbing the carton closest, she began to eat, realising that she was actually quite hungry.

"Will your new girlfriend not be missing you?" She spat the words out.

"Not tonight. I told her that I needed to spend the night with an upset friend." He tried to ignore the venom in her voice.

"I am not upset."

"But you are my friend." He held her gaze, neither one wanting to break it. He looked down first, not wanting to see the pain in her eyes anymore.

"Yes, and you are mine." She smiled, the emotion not reaching her eyes as she built her protective walls. They ate in an awkward silence, neither one raising their eyes from their food. "I am going for a shower." Said Ziva as she stood up, finished with the meal. She had expected for him to leave, but, after her long shower with the water turned up as high as possible, the hot water scalding her skin, he was still in her apartment, apparently tidying up from dinner. "I thought you would have gone home by now." She feigned insouciance, trying to decide whether she actually wanted him to stay or not. One the one hand, she had missed having him there and she liked the way he seemed to actually care about her again, but as he had pointed out – he was there under orders. He did not want to be there, he wanted to be with Her. She felt like she was just getting in the way, he had other things, better things to be doing than babysitting her.

"I don't want you to be alone tonight. I'm gonna stay in your spare room." He invited himself over.

"That is not necessary. I will be fine."

"I don't care. I want to make sure you have someone to go to if you have any bad dreams tonight."

"I learnt to cope with the bad dreams." She bluffed, her tone a little harsher than she meant. Her words cut him deeper than any knife could, and he had to pause to almost literally catch his breath after that blow.

"Good. Then it won't be a problem for me to stay." He shrugged it off, turning away so she couldn't see his face. He had let her down, he would admit it. But she would understand when it was all over, wouldn't she? She had surely done worse for missions in Mossad? But he knew that however much he tried to justify it – it was an order for a case, he had to, Jenny had asked him, it was for the greater good – it was never enough compared to how much he had let her down. She was his best friend and he had ignored her, made her worry about him for no reason.

"I am going to bed." She stated, turning and leaving before he could even register her words.

She felt strong arms wrap around her waist from behind her as she stared into the glass of water in her hands. She smiled slightly as he pressed a light kiss to her shoulder, for a moment forgetting everything that had happened. But the memories came flooding back and she stiffened, trying not to breathe his familiar scent as he rested his chin on her shoulder. "I though you said you had learnt to cope with the dreams." He whispered softly.

"I had."

"Why are you crying then?"

"Because that is what I do when my coping method is not here."

"Who is your coping method?" He removed his chin but not his arms.

"You." Barely audible, no more than a whisper.

"Then why are you crying now?" His voice caught in his throat as he wiped away the tears that dribbled down her pink cheeks.

"Because you are not here."

"I'm stood right behind you, Ziva." He frowned.

"Not you. Not my Tony." She shook her head, the tears flowing faster now.

"I'll always be your Tony, Ziva. Always." He kissed the top of her head and hugged her slightly tighter. "You want to talk about the nightmare?"

"No." She shook her head slowly, placing the glass of water down and leaning her head against his chest.

"Come on, I'll be your Tony." He smiled. "I'll ward away the nightmares." He guided her to 'his' room and let her curl up in his arms, smiling as she automatically settled down and her eyelids fluttered closed.

"I love you, Tony." She murmured as her breathing slowed.

"I love you too, Ziva." He whispered. He hadn't even noticed he was going to say it until it slipped out. He rubbed her back slightly, making sure she was asleep and hadn't heard him. How was it that he couldn't say those three simple little words to Jeanne, but it was so easy to say to Ziva. It just rolled off his tongue with her. He didn't know why he couldn't say it to her. He tried, but he couldn't. He knew it wasn't real, he knew that it was for a case, but it still felt like he should be able to say it to her. Because when he forgot that he was just working a case, just following orders and it wasn't real, he felt like he really could love her if he tried. But maybe that was the point. He had to try. With Ziva, there was no trying.

It was automatic.