Amanda walked into the house and saw Nick standing in the kitchen, he turned to her when he heard the door open and Amanda could see his red eyes.
"Mommy!" Ethan ran to her and almost jumped into her arms "daddy cried"
"It's ok to cry baby" she kissed his cheek "how about you go get dressed and then I'll help you brush your teeth" she gave him another kiss and lowered him to the floor before walking over to Nick.
"Sorry" he felt bad for bursting into tears in front of their son.
"Don't worry" she looked at him sympathetically and grabbed his hand, moving it to her lips.
"You want to go rest for a while? I'll take care of breakfast" she offered but Nick shook her head.
"You have to be at work soon"
"No, I called and took a personal day, I want to be with you" she didn't let go of his hand.
"Thanks, but you must be tired, you haven't slept for over twenty four hours"
Nick wasn't wrong, between Ethan waking them up at five am the previous day and spending the entire night at the hospital, she was exhausted. But they've been through such a tough experience and she wanted to be there and support Nick.
"I'm fine" he placed his hand on top of hers "I'm gonna be fine, I'll make him breakfast and we'll take Frannie for a walk, get some sleep, you need it"
Amanda smiled and kissed his lips and looked into his eyes, she wanted to make sure he was ok with this, sometimes Nick didn't like admitting he needed help, and right now he definitely needed someone.
"Go to sleep" he reassured "we'll talk later"
"I'm ready" Ethan was dressed in a t shirt with cars on it and a pair of jeans, he was looking at the pictures on the fabric as he walked into the room.
"I'll help you, mommy needs to sleep" Nick smiled at her.
"Look daddy" Ethan pointed at one of the cars.
Amanda knew she needed a shower but when she stepped into the bedroom the exhaustion took over her and she changed her clothes quickly and got under the covers, she was asleep before her head touched the pillow.
Nick prepared a light breakfast and after they were done eating Frannie finally was awarded with her walk.
"Daddy" Ethan was holding on to Nick's hand and looked up at his father "it's ok to cry"
"Of course it's alright hijo" Nick smiled at him.
"You was sad" Ethan continued.
"You were sad" Nick corrected.
"No, I wasn't" the boy said.
"No, you weren't sad and you made me feel better" Nick smiled at him again, he still felt uncomfortable about his reaction, he couldn't remember ever crying in front of Ethan. A part of him felt bad about it, when he was young crying wasn't encouraged, it was a reason to be punished.
They made their way back after a while and Nick checked his phone, he left it at home, not wanting to get calls while he was out with Ethan. There were no missed calls and Nick took it as a good sign, people still didn't know about the event of the previous night.
"Go play kiddo" Nick ruffled his hair "I'll be right back" Nick refilled Frannie's bowls and walked into the bedroom.
Nick looked at Amanda who was lying on her stomach, sleeping. He closed the blinds, wanting the room to be darker so she'd sleep better. She looked so calm when she slept and when they first started their long distance relationship he had spent a lot of hours watching her, his eyes would travel up and down her body and he missed her even though she was right there next to him. Even now that they've been living together, had a child together, he still loved looking at her. But he didn't have to long for her anymore, she was his and he belonged to her.
"Daddy" Ethan walked into the room and Nick realized he's been standing there a long time.
"Come on buddy" Nick said quietly, not wanting to wake her up.
"I want to play with mommy" Ethan followed Nick back to the living room.
"Mommy is tired so we're gonna let her sleep for a while" he sat down on the floor "how about a puzzle?" he yawned.
"Daddy you're tired" Ethan smiled at him "go to sleep"
"If I go to sleep who's gonna play with you?" Nick let out a quick laugh and tickled Ethan a little.
"Frannie" the boy giggled and wrapped his arms around his father's neck.
"How comes you are such a good kid, ha?"
"Don't know" Ethan shrugged and Nick kissed each of his cheeks.
They worked on a puzzle for a while and when they were almost done they heard foot steps and greeted Amanda with smiles.
"What are you boys doing?" she asked and sat down on the floor next to Nick. She rested her head against his arm and caressed his palm.
"A lion" Ethan pointed on his head proudly "we made the puzzle"
"You two are so talented" she grinned.
While Ethan placed the last piece in it's place Amanda looked at Nick, she knew him so well it was easy for her to read him. She wrapped her arms around him, knowing words were useless, what could she tell him?
Nick kissed the top of her head and they looked at Ethan who announced the puzzle was finished.
They took Frannie for another walk and spent a while playing at the park. Ethan was so energetic, he wanted Nick to run around with him and Frannie and the exercise helped take Nick's mind off things, for a while Nick was distracted, focused on those who loved and cared about him. His son's laugh, Amanda's hand on his arm, her lips on his cheek.
"Daddy I wanna swing" Ethan asked him.
"Alright" Nick stood up and took the boy's hand.
Amanda watched as they walked to the swing set, she was about to get up and follow them when she got a call.
"Rollins" she answered.
"It's Kendrick" the man on the other line said "I heard what happened"
"Yeah" Amanda looked up at Nick, he was pushing the swing and Ethan was smiling happily, probably asking to go higher.
"So did the news, it's already out there…"
"What about…him? Is he lawyered up already?" she asked.
"Yeah, he's not talking to us yet, but it doesn't really matter, he's not gonna get bail and even if he pleads anything other than guilty he's still going to jail, we have enough"
"I hope so, are you going to call us to testify?" Amanda knew Nick would do it, even though he didn't want to.
"You know I have to, but hopefully he's gonna go with guilty and we can avoid a trial"
Amanda wasn't sure that would happen, with what Nick had told her, his father didn't seem like a man who owned up to things, putting the blame on others.
"Ok, keep me posted" Amanda placed the phone in her pocket and walked to Nick and Ethan.
"I'm gonna go get some rest" Nick said when he walked out of Ethan's room, he had just put the boy down for a nap. He gave her a tender kiss and walked into the bedroom. Nick took off his shirt and pants and got under the covers. He was tired and expected to fall asleep in an instant, but it wasn't that easy. The moment he closed his eyes all the memories he pushed away that day came rushing back. His eyelids opened and he stared at the ceiling, trying to make it go away, just for a little while.
The door opened after a few minutes and Amanda walked in, she didn't seem to notice he was awake and quietly walked to the dresser. Nick watched as she took off her earrings and placed them on the wooden surface. She reached for her shirt and pulled it off.
"Amanda" he spoke up and she turned to him.
"Did I wake you up?"
"No" he sat up and moved to the edge of the bed "come here"
She smiled slightly and walked over to him "what is it?"
Nick didn't use his words to reply, he grabbed her hands and pulled her closer to him, resting his forehead against her bare abdomen. This closeness always made him feel better. It felt like Amanda was a part of his body and soul. He needed her, needed her comfort, her touch, her love. Her.
Nick trailed a few kisses on her skin and Amanda caressed his hair, his lips on her body were magical and she could never get enough.
"Nick" she mumbled, not sure if she should stop this, his hands left hers and moved to her back, traveling from her belt up. He looked up to meet her eyes, saying, without words, that he wanted this.
She smiled at him and reached behind her back to unclasp her bra and removed it with Nick's eyes glued to her eyes and lips. Once her breasts were free Amanda sat down in his lap and kissed him, their lips meeting for a few quick pecks before melding their tongues together. Their hands roamed the other's body and they parted to look at the other again.
"I love you" Amanda whispered before she started working on his neck.
He closed his eyes, and wrapped his arms around her body, lowering her down on the bed. Nick got on top of her and kissed her lips before removing his boxers, remaining completely naked. He worked on her jeans and quickly took them off, along with her underwear. Nick allowed his eyes to move up and down her body.
"Come here" she placed her feet on the mattress and gave him a flirty smile.
Nick positioned himself between her legs and leaned in to kiss her lips again "I need you" he said before thrusting himself inside her.
Amanda let out a sigh when he entered her body and captured Nick's mouth, needing to kiss him. They moved together slowly, their bodies knew exactly what to do and Nick and Amanda kept on kissing, making quick breaks to catch their breath.
"I love you" Nick said just before he climaxed inside of her.
Amanda could feel Nick's even breaths and knew he had fallen asleep. His arms were wrapped around her and she had to turn very carefully, she didn't want to wake him up. He was so stressed and needed the rest. She couldn't fix this, all she could do was to be there for and with him, like he was and would be there for her.
Amanda wiggled her way out of his arms and put her clothes on before stepping out of her room. She had a few missed calls but she didn't want to call anyone back, they were just curious about Nick's father and she didn't want to talk about it to them. Being a witness to the baby's death was hard on her too, but supporting Nick was making her stronger.
She heard Ethan's footsteps and smiled when he approached her "I see you're up"
"Yes" he was still sleepy and rubbed his eyes "I'm hungry mommy"
"Then lets get you something to eat" she picked him up and kissed his cheek.
"I want the cake I made" he let her know "with daddy and Silvia helped"
"Oh" she walked to the fridge with him is her arms and opened the door.
"This one" he pointed at the leftover cake and Amanda took it out.
"A little bit baby" she placed him in his sit and gave him a piece of cake.
"You too" he said with a mouth full of the chocolate cake.
Amanda sat next to him and cut herself a small piece too, she should get rid of it before Nick wakes up.
"Yummy" Ethan licked his spoon "we did it"
"Yeah? You helped your dad make the cake?" she asked.
"Yes and Silvia helped us" he finished the remaining of his cake "I want more"
"More cake, ha?" he was looking at her with as if this was his one and only wish, to have another piece of cake.
"Yes!" he replied excitedly and pushed his plate to her "please thank you"
"An itsy bitsy piece" she said.
"Not itsy bitsy" he shook his head.
"So just an itsy, no bitsy" she chuckled and gave him another piece.
"What are you eating?" Nick walked into the room.
"Our cake daddy" Ethan informed "give him some mommy"
Nick sat down next to Amanda and she placed her hand on his thigh "I think I already did" she winked but Nick gave her a stern look and Ethan didn't even notice, as he was busy eating the every crumb left on his plate.
"What do you want to do with this?" she looked down on the table.
"There's barely any left, just finish it" he shrugged "it's no big deal"
Ethan was done eating and got off his seat to play with Frannie.
"The ADA called me earlier" Amanda looked at Nick, her hand still on his thigh "while we were at the playground"
"What did he say?"
"That he's not talking, Kendrick hopes he pleads guilty to avoid a trial, but he's not talking so…"
"There's gonna be a trial and he wants me to testify" Nick interrupted mid sentence.
"Yeah"
"Damn it" he stood up "after what he's done…" Nick felt the anger building up, it was a familiar feeling, one he has experienced so many times before, something that could take over him and…but he wasn't that man anymore, he knew how to control it, how to let it out without hurting anyone or anything.
"If it comes to that we'll deal with it together" Amanda got up and touched his shoulders.
"It's not about the trial, it's about everything else, Amanda I…there's still so much I have to do and I…" he had to take care of the funeral arrangements and how could he do that when the child didn't have a name?
Amanda wrapped her arms around him "we" she said.
"I hate that he dragged you into this" Nick sighed.
"I'm here for you, not because of him" she let him go and he turned around so he could kiss her.
"You know what?" he walked back to the table and looked at the cake "I am going to finish this"
Amanda wasn't sure what he was talking about and he didn't elaborate. Nick walked over to Ethan, gave him a kiss and said he'd be back later.
"Where are you going Nick?" Amanda followed him to the bedroom and watched as he got dressed.
"To do something I promised myself not to"