A/N: Aaah! I accidentally posted Miss Mystic instead of Under Control. I'm silly. Here's Under Control instead!

Under Control

"If I go crazy then will you still call me superman?"

Stefan needs to get himself under control; his 'diet' is un-natural. I don't get it at all. It's not like he needs to kill to survive. That's what blood bags are for. And I tell him so – look at me, I haven't killed a human in a looong time. Okay apart from Miss Gibbons – but that was totally necessary – and Alaric – but he came back to life so that doesn't count. Whatever. So not the point.

It's completely self-serving I'm trying to keep a low profile, keep the town unaware of vampires which isn't the easiest task with tomb vamps running amok.

"Yeah what are we planning on doing about that?" Stefan asks me – "well you're not going to be doing much of anything if you don't have your strength – there's nothing wrong with partaking in a healthy diet of human blood from a blood bag – you're not actually killing anyone" – I know I should probably stop repeating myself but I can't help thinking that maybe one day he'll actually listen to me.

He has 'reasons' apparently – yeah well what are they? – I mean I get the whole 'you're a ripper' thing but you can drink from blood bags – not people – learn moderation and control before turning your fangs to snatch/eat/erase. He says he has it 'under control' uh, yeah looks that way. But I have a council meeting and I can't sit around all day trying to help someone who's living in denial of his very nature.

I can't tell you how much I love having infiltrated the Mystic Falls Council, it's just so...perfect. There's a new guy. John Gilbert. Elena's uncle. According to his news the tomb vamps are going a bit nuts in the local areas. Not good. Really need to deal with them. And Uncle John? Getting some...off radar vibes about him as well.

Oooh, Elena is calling me. That's...intriguing. She asks me to come over to her house and she sounds...concerned.

"Oh good you're here" – hmm it's nice to be wanted – "You ask I come. I'm easy like that"

We go up to her bedroom, "Ah just like I remembered" that probably wasn't a good thing to say since technically she doesn't know I've been in here before. Luckily she didn't seem to pick up on it. I pick up her teddy bear and make myself comfortable on her bed.

Hey, if she's going to invite me into her bedroom then I'm damn well going to make the most of it. I tell her about Uncle John's adventures with the Founders Council – apparently she didn't know.

"Perfect. We'll just add it to the growing list of how everything's falling apart" - why what else is going on? That's when I notice the broken shelf on the wall and the broken lamp.

"What happened right there?" – "Uh, nothing" – Uh-huh; doesn't look like nothing. What is she not telling me?

She's worried about Stefan, so I'm assuming the mess in the corner had something to do with him. "He's not himself" – well. I beg to differ. I give her the teddy bear and decide to take advantage of the opportunity to look around her room.

She keeps a journal right? Why I am even asking that. She's a Gilbert, kinda, well, technically she's a Petrova but she was brought up a Gilbert so she definitely keeps a journal. If I can find it I can see if she really thinks I'm a 'self serving psychopath with no redeeming qualities' yeah still stings.

"Well maybe the problem is he's spent too long not being himself" – nope no journal – underwear! Even better!

"Please don't make me sorry for asking you" – "the Stefan you know is fight against his nature to an annoyingly obsessive lever, Stefan. But if you think there's not another part to this then you have not been paying attention" – "he's not you – not even close" – "well he doesn't wanna be me. That doesn't mean that deep down he's not" – I walk over to her and stand in front of her for a minute, every time I'm within an inch of her there's so much heat there and if she thinks I can't hear how her heart speeds up when I get too close then she definitely hasn't been paying attention.

And it's not fear. Trust me. I love it.

Yet another Founder's Day event – are these literally never ending? It feels like there's one a week. Stefan thinks he shouldn't be here – boy's gonna lose it. "I liked you a lot better when you hated everybody" – "Oh I still do. I just love that they love me" – aint that the truth. Time to get a drink. Or three.

I stand in the corner and watch Elena for a few minutes and yes I know how stalker-ish that sounds but I just want to observe in peace for a minute. She looks beautiful, as usual. Stefan is dancing!

"Have I entered an alternate universe where Stefan is fun?" highly unlikely. Stefan wouldn't know fun if it bit him on the ass. Unfortunately it seems to be bringing Elena down but that could actually work in my favour so I'm not too concerned really.

According to Liz I have won the council over. Good to know. "I like my life here in Mystic Falls. Starting to feel like home again" Damn Jeremy Gilbert – asking questions about Vicki – I really should have taken better care of her.

Ah, Elena's here. "Have you noticed what your brothers been up to?" – "nope been too pre-occupied with yours – he's been asking questions about Vicki Donovan's death – oh but sheriff someone buried her, who would do that? I know, I know, me!" I offer to compel him again, all she'd need to do is get rid of the vervain but she's not too thrilled with that idea.

Still if he keeps asking questions then I might have to but Elena says she'll handle it. We'll see. I pick a red rose from the centrepiece beside me and give it to her before leaving. I'm only leaving because what I really want is to ask her to dance but since I'm fairly confident she'll just turn me down again I walk away to keep myself from opening my big mouth. No need to purposefully make a fool of myself after all.

I'm standing outside having a perfectly nice time thinking about Elena when Uncle John Gilbert comes out to bother me. Do you think Elena would hate me if I killed this guy? He seems to know a little too much. Mm-hmm definitely knows too much. So...I might have killed Uncle John Gilbert. Oops – my bad.

Wow Stefan is drunk – super drunk. I drop the bombshell on him that I just killed Uncle John Gilbert and that the council is back on pitchfork mode but he just walks away. Honestly that boy is going to lose it.

Oh great. Apparently killing Uncle John Gilbert didn't stick. I am getting a teeny bit sick of these 'come back to life rings' – I tell the teacher and he got his ring from Isobel. Who gave birth to Elena. Under the medical care of Dr. Grayson Gilbert. John's brother. Anyone else seeing a pattern here? No? Just me then.

The teacher and I have a little chat with Uncle John Gilbert. Apparently the ring Ric wears belonged to him. He threatens to expose Stef and me to the council and he said he sent Isobel to me, not Katherine, which isn't entirely surprising. What is surprising is that he knows about Katherine. What does he want? I do not like this guy. As evidenced by my unsuccessful attempt to kill him. God I need to go home.

Stefan's finally back.

"We have a problem Stefan and when I say problem I mean...global crisis" – ummm...maybe this can wait. Stefan looks...hungry. It's different this time, the need is too strong. I knew he was going to lose it.

Perfect timing little brother; as ever – I leave my glass of blood for him and wish him a good night. I guess I'll deal with all the global crisis's alone then.

Dear Diary,
This is the growing list of how everything is falling apart: Uncle John came back to town. My favourite person in the world – apparently his trip is 'open ended' – great!

Jeremy wrote a paper about vampires in Mystic Falls which is...concerning to say the least. It's not safe for him to be involved in this. I was worried he was starting to remember but Stefan said Damon took those memories for good and I spoke to Jeremy but he didn't really seem to know anything so I suppose that's good – still I'm concerned.

Stefan seems to be losing it – he told me he was doing good, getting better but when we were kissing something happened – one minute he was fine and then he just changed – flew backwards into the wall and he was growling and I was kind of scared and then he just disappeared. Then tonight he was really drunk – and he came by afterwards and told me that he wasn't handling it – the human blood – which I'd already worked out for myself anyway. He said that he doesn't want me to see him like this, that he doesn't want me to know this side of him exists but it does; he can't hide from me. You can't only be half a person with the one you're supposed to love.

Oddly enough the only one that's not causing me problems right now is Damon. I called him after what happened with Stefan earlier in the bedroom and he came right over, he mentioned something about being in my bedroom before – what was that about? He's never been in here, as far as I know. Strange but it's not really that important right now. He said that Stefan has been fighting his nature forever – and that he is more like Damon than either of us would like to admit. I guess I can see how that might be true.

Then tonight at the Founder's party he was really sweet, told me about Jeremy asking questions about Vicki's death and offered to compel him again – but I don't want to do that again – then he gave me a rose, I thought he might ask me to dance but I suppose it's best that he didn't – it probably wouldn't have been a good idea.

I kept the rose though. I put it in my underwear drawer that he was rifling through earlier – I couldn't believe it when he did that but I guess it is typical Damon.

So yeah – problems piling on top of problems on top of problems. Hopefully tomorrow there will be NO problems! Wishful thinking I'm sure.
Elena