Andy sighed as she looked around her kitchen and yard. The gathering was coming to a close, and while it had been fun and Dani had enjoyed it, cleaning up the mess was going to take forever, even with Jerry and Traci staying to help her. She went back outside to say goodbye to the remaining guests as they left. Soon only Andy, Traci, and Jerry were there, walking around the yard picking up trash and cleaning up food. Leo had taken the girls into the house to watch a movie, leaving their parents alone to talk.
"So, how did Dani take it when she woke up this morning to no Sam?" Traci asked as she wiped off a table near Andy. Despite Andy's attempts to lower Dani's hopes for today, her daughter was adamant that Sam would show up at the last minute to surprise her.
"Not as badly as I thought she would. I don't think she's given up hope yet. She's still expecting him to walk through the door at any moment. I think it's going to be really hard on her tonight, though." Andy answered.
Traci nodded, but didn't know how to comfort her friend. "She's young, Andy. She doesn't understand. Sam's her father. In her mind he can do anything, beat anyone. She can't grasp the danger he'd be in coming home." Jerry tried to assure her.
"I know that, but it doesn't help the girls. Yes, they are too young to understand, but it doesn't negate their pain." Andy quieted then, "I feel useless, there's nothing I can do or say to make them feel better. The only thing they want is Sam; he's the only thing I can't get them right now. On top of that, I'm failing them, too. Things are falling through the cracks, I can't do everything Sam and I used to do with them alone."
"Andy you're doing the best you can in a situation you and Sam were forced into. You can't be expected to parent for two and work, especially when you're almost five months pregnant."
They continued to chat while they worked until the yard was cleaned. It was almost midnight when the three headed back into the house where Traci and Jerry collected Leo before they both hugged Andy and said goodnight.
She shut the door, and turned around to find a very tired Dani looking at her. "He's not coming is he, mommy?" She didn't even sound upset anymore just defeated. Andy's heart broke when she heard her four year old speak like that. The resignation held a pain that a child that young should not have to face, but she had faced the pain of her missing father so many times over the past several months, she didn't even have a strong reaction to it anymore.
"No sweetie, daddy is still working." She took Dani's hand and led her back to the couch where Lily had fallen asleep against the cushions. She carefully picked Lily up with her free arm, not ready to let go of Dani yet.
After settling Lily in bed, she turned to Dani, "Dani, daddy would have been here if he could have. Right now, daddy could get hurt if he tried to come home, or one of us could get hurt. I know your daddy. I know that he wanted to be here and he's very sad that he couldn't be, but when he comes home, we are going to go to have a day and all of us are going to do whatever you want for the whole day, alright? This isn't forever; we just have to wait a little bit longer."
"Ok, mommy. I can't wait."
"Neither cans me. Are you ready to go to bed now?"
Dani nodded. "I am very tired."
"Me, too. I love you." Andy said.
"I love you, too, mommy." Andy tucked the blankets around Dani before turning out the lights and headed for her own room.
Sam was angry. He was trying to appease a buyer's displeasure with a previous purchase. One of the girls he'd purchased had died within a week of receiving her. He wanted another girl as a replacement. Instead of celebrating his daughter's birthday, Sam was negotiating the sale of someone else's daughter into slavery. He couldn't believe Boyd had forced him into this. When he got home he would be talking to internal affairs and starting another investigation into Boyd. He would see Boyd lose his badge, even if it was the last thing he did. He was used to being threatened by Boyd, he'd come to expect it, but involving his wife and daughters had been the last straw.
"So, we have a deal?" the buyer asked, interrupting Sam's internal rant. Amos Stiles was the biggest buyer Defraine had. He made several purchases every two weeks, and occasionally stopped in unannounced for a side purchase.
"Yes, sir, for every three purchases in your next transaction, you'll get a fourth on us." Sam had conditioned himself into not mentioning the girls in conversation, he was afraid his disgust would show and he'd get made.
"Good, I like you, Sammy. You know how to make things right."
"Glad you feel that way, Mr. Stiles. I assume we'll be seeing you soon?"
"I'll return for to my usual schedule, yes."
"I look forward to doing business with you." Sam said, smiling at the man. He wasn't sure how much longer he could continue to keep up his act around these monsters. They represented everything that repulsed him. He couldn't wait to see his wife, to talk to her about all he's seen, to hear her tell him it would be ok.
At six months pregnant, Andy was very tired, and not at all prepared to deal with the screaming five year olds Lily had invited to her sleepover. While Sam was away, Andy tried to be more lenient with the girls and their activities. Lily had wanted a slumber party for her birthday, and while it was difficult for Andy, she hoped with Lily's friends sleeping at her house, that Lily would be less distracted from the fact that her father was not. She was actually surprised, since that night a week before Dani's birthday, she hadn't mentioned Sam once. Andy figured it was a coping mechanism, but she hoped it wasn't anything deeper.
"LADIES!" Andy yelled upstairs for the third time, "It's time for dinner. It's on the table and if you don't hurry it's going to get cold."
"A moment later she heard a stampede of feet running across the upstairs, before a herd of seven five year old came flying down the steps. Dani followed close behind.
When everyone was seated, Andy began serving plates of pizza to each child. They chattered as they ate, and as soon as the last child had eaten her last bite, all seven of them had flown back upstairs, giggling the whole way with Lily in the lead. Andy sat with her younger daughter as she finished her pizza and Andy began eating hers. She thought about Sam. He'd missed two big events and as the days past without a word from Sam or his handlers, she'd begun to worry he'd miss even more, starting with Lily's first day of kindergarten on September 1st. Lily would be crushed if Sam and Andy didn't both drive her to school on her first day, a tradition they'd started two years early and continued last year with Dani.
"Why doesn't Lily ask about Daddy?" Andy was startled by her daughter's question.
"Sometimes it's easier to not think about the things that upset us. If we pretend the sadness isn't there, we don't have to deal with it."
"So Lily still misses daddy, even when she doesn't talk about him?"
"Yes, sweetheart. I think she does. You like to talk about daddy, and feel how you feel, but I think Lily wants to be happy, and by acting like everything is ok, she is."
It'd been another month, another missed birthday, and Sam was still no closer to figuring out where the girls were coming from. He was beginning to become more involved, but still only in the dealing side of the business, he was not included in the buys. He hoped that there would be a change soon. He appeared to be moving up the ranks. He'd seen many of the employees come and go, and each time someone left, Sam gained more seniority. Sam appeared to have a more permanent place due to his position in the legal side of the business, the bartender. He was grateful for that. If he'd have been forced to leave and try to work his way back in, the operation would have gone on much longer.
He wished more than anything he was home right now, helping Andy clean up whatever mess the party she would have insisted on throwing for Lily, even though she was six months pregnant and should have been taking it easy, talking and laughing about the events of the day. Instead he was stuck in in his small, run-down apartment, with nothing to do but listen to The Iliad on tape. A surprise gift Andy had slipped him before he left.