Choices

by Pokeshadow97

Kira has always hated L, that much has been obvious from the very start. But when Light starts questioning his feeling, an internal conflict starts. Not helped in anyway when the odd detective does something so unexpected, Light doesn't know what to do. He wants to allow these new feelings to happen, but will he listen to his own heart, or to Kira's...Yaoi, Light X L/Ryuzaki, Smut

6. Chapter 6

A/n:

Just wanted to quickly say last sunday, easter in other words, was actually the one year anniversary of this first being uploaded. Yay for being five days late because i'm slow... also, if you've just skipped straight here because you saw the word update, I would recommend reading the whole thing again. I've made huge updates to the old stuff so yeah... also, this is the longest chapter I've ever written for anything... over 15,000 words... *dies*

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Light's POV

Light couldn't figure out why Ryuzaki was so damn persistent about this park right now. He was quite literally dragging him through the front gates by the arm. He understood that he wanted Light to follow him, but he did have his own feet! He could walk by himself! Light caught a glimpse of a big wooden sign, big black letters burned into the surface.

Saigo no wakare

Huh...weird name for a park...wonder if Ryuzaki knows what it says? Of course he does! He talks to you pretty frequently doesn't he? Besides, you've seen him write better than most people back at school. True I guess... still a weird name for a park... must be a good story behind it or something, most places like this do. Maybe...wonder what he wants with us? I don't even want to know...something weird. Don't you complain, you like it when he gets weird…

"Alright then...it's just up here" Ryuzaki said dully, still dragging Light along behind him.

"Yeah but where exactly is here?" Light asked for the hundredth time.

"This way" Ryuzaki repeated himself. Again! Light rolled his eyes, but said nothing. Why bother, Ryuzaki wasn't going to answer him properly anyway...

Rem better keep to her word, Light needed her to more than anything. Light was pretty sure the whole "I'm doing it to save Misa" thing convinced her...but still...

I still don't understand why you made us do that... it won't work you know... yes it will, I know it won't fail! You can't keep this up forever, L's time is limited with or without Rem! NO! IT WILL WORK! IT HAS TOO! Light screamed at the voice in his head. Why? Why can't Kira just be happy for Light? They were the SAME FREAKING PERSON FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!

Kira you of all people should know what he means to me... I do know, that's why I'm doing this! The closer L gets to you, the more he'll figure out! He might pretend to care about you, but he doesn't! This is just a way for him to make us weak, make us fall for his trap and confess. What do you think'll happen then? When he finds out about me, we're both dead. Remember that? 'Kira will get the death penalty' know who said that? Ryuzaki. Hideki Ryuga. L. Your "Lover". He wants us...no... you dead Light. He may be after me, but it's you who'll take the fall. He doesn't love you, you get that? He doesn't love you... I'm sorry but...it's true... I'd take it all away if I could but...you don't really like my methods do you? I...well I... Light felt himself choke up a little as he walked, almost stumbling but managing to catch himself in time. Was it all a lie? Some cruel trick of Ryuzaki's to catch him off guard by making him feel this way. Could...Kira be right...? No, Light refused to believe it. It had to be real! It just HAD TO! Light knew the difference between fake affection and emotions like love and the real thing, he'd done it to so many girls before he knew it off by heart. What he felt for Ryuzaki was real, REAL! He felt in deep in his heart, the warmest, happiest feeling in the world imaginable that came whenever he looked at the quirky little man. It can't all be for nothing...it can't...

"...ght...Light!" A voice cut through Light's internal crisis. Ryuzaki hand a hand on Light's shoulders and had given him a small shake before Light had even noticed him. He blinked out of his trance and focused on Ryuzaki.

"Hmm?" Light looked at the man before him.

"I've been trying to get your attention for fifty seven seconds straight now. Are you alright?" Ryuzaki asked. Light looked over Ryuzaki, trying to determine if the concern he was hearing was real or fake.

"...Yeah...I'm ok. Just thinking is all" Light put on the biggest and most convincing smile he could muster, as if he was embarrassed by being caught out.

"...Of course" Ryuzaki muttered, an odd look in his face. Crap, Light needed to get this back on track before...something bad happened...

"So, where is this thing you wanted to bring me here before?" Light beamed. Ryuzaki's eyes lightened up slightly at this.

"Oh yes, this way" Ryuzaki took Light by the hand and lead him on. Not like he had before, dragging him behind him like a rag doll, but actually walking alongside him, hand in hand. Light looked down at their entwined fingers curiously. Real...or not real...? Light had never felt more...uncertain of his feelings as he did at that moment. His heart fluttered with what could only be…no, maybe love wasn't the right word to use. It was like love, certainly, but there was no way a monster like Light could be allowed these sort of emotions right? He didn't even know anymore… maybe he did have an odd form of love for the strange man... but he was overwhelmed in sadness and confusion over the fact that it could be a lie. Light smiled, internally conflicted, and squeezed the fingers lightly.

Kira...I know you're in here with me...do...do you...feel this too? Light asked the voice in his head cautiously. I can feel everything you feel so- I don't mean that. I mean, do you feel it? I...well...slightly. I can't deny it, but I can see through it. Past the deceptions. But yes... I feel the...the...the attraction and the fondness...damn it, your soppy emotions are rubbing off on me. Kira chuckled. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? No idea. Probably bad. All I know is I'll let you do all the physical stuff, I'll just wait till you actually need me for something...me related. Whatever you say Kira.

...

"Ok, this is it" Ryuzaki said, pointing at something in front of them. Light looked at what it was. A big stone tablet, elegant Japanese words carved into the grey, mossy slab. A little wooden sign beside it had the English transcription for tourists, but Light completely ignored that. It's not like he needed it, he was Japanese after all. Besides, the English translation looked rather butchered compared to the original. They usually did… The words were a story of how the park was named. Light began to read.

It was a story Light was unfamiliar with, and he'd studied most stories and legends surround Japan… oh well, maybe the legend was created just for this, but then again, most are. The story was about a pair of wolves, one the colour of the night sky, the other the colour of stardust. They were the reincarnated spirits of a young couple that had drowned in the river from what Light understood. The wolves began to hunt the livestock of the village in this spot, and the people grew angry. They hired a hunter to get rid of the wolves for good. Light thought that was a little harsh, but people were pretty cruel back in those days a well…

The wolves had been sleeping soundly together in the forest when the hunter found them, not realising what was happening. The hunter drew out his weapon, it didn't specify what but Light assumed it was a knife of some sort, and drove it at the black wolf. The white wolf howled ferociously and knocked his lover out of the way, taking the blow himself. Light was surprised, he thought the black wolf had been the boy… he actually began to feel sad as it began describing what happened next.

The wolf howled in agony as its partner began to die.

There was so much sadness in the animal's voice, the hunter stopped

The black wolf whined and tried to wake his lover up

But it was already too late.

In a dazzling flash of light, the wolves had gone

To be replaced by their true forms.

A man with long black hair fell to his knees and cradled his dying love

In his arms lay his other with pure white hair

The hunter he realised what he had done with horror

The people of the town finally realised they had nothing to fear

Because all the two had done was love

The black haired man wept over the body of his lover and whispered softly

"You were my Light in the darkness"

"And without you, the world is too dark"

"This is my last goodbye"

He took the blade from his lover and ended his own life

Hands entwined with his love even in death

...

Do not love because you have to

Love because you need to

And most of all

Love because no matter who you are

Where you are from

What gender you are

You are you

And love is love

"Light? Are you crying?" Ryuzaki asked in a small voice. Light wiped his eyes furiously.

"No! I'm just...the wind is making my eyes dry" Light lied lamely. Ryuzaki smiled and put his head on Light's shoulder.

"It's ok to cry Light, it is a sad story" Ryuzaki said.

"I know..." Light sniffed. "Is that a true story?"

"Take a look for yourself" Ryuzaki took Light's hand and turned him around. Light blinked at what he saw. A cherry blossom tree, not in bloom obviously as it was autumn, and two small gravestones. The brown and golden leaves covered the ground around them, framing them in a deep orange glow. Light could see two names written on the old stone slabs.

Seji Shiawasena

Sono Ai

"The first one was the black wolf, the second was the white one. They supposedly buried them under this tree" Ryuzaki told Light softly. Light glanced at the ancient maple that had been carefully grown to twist around itself, only about four meters tall, and had a white memorial strip wrapped around its trunk made from cloth.

That...that was just... geez... Light sniffed again. The fact that it could be real was just... Oh stop blubbering, you look like a baby! They're dogs for crying out loud! Leave me alone that was an awful story. And they weren't dogs, they were human's trapped in a wolf's body Still, even if it's real, it would have happened over a hundred years ago, people died all the time for stupid reasons. And suicidal wolves is a pretty farfetched story Yeah but this...this is...

"That's just sad" Light laughed shakily. He wasn't sure if he was talking to Ryuzaki or Kira, but either way, the statement was true.

"Yes I know. A horrible way to die, being stabbed in the heart. I don't ever want to imagine dying like that..." Ryuzaki trailed away. There was something in his voice that wasn't quite right...

"Huh? I don't think I follow you. What do you mean 'like that'?" Light asked, slightly concerned. Ryuzaki didn't answer. He just turned and walked away.

"Ryuzaki! Where are you...oh for crying out- Wait up!" Light ran to catch up with the slouched figure quickly disappearing up the path. He jogged for a few seconds before he caught up with Ryuzaki. Ryuzaki had his hands in his pockets and was staring down at the ground.

"Where are you going?" Light asked.

"You'll see" Ryuzaki muttered. Again. Uhg couldn't he ever give a straight answer for anything?

Nope…

---

Ryuzaki's POV

Just around the corner. That was all he needed to go. Under the maple trees. There they wouldn't be seen by any pedestrians, because it was off the main path. Only he knew about it. Ryuzaki had found it the first time he had ever come here with Watari. Wasn't hard to find, if you knew what to look for. Either way, it was perfect.

Ryuzaki looked over at Light once more. He hadn't been wrong. It was really there. He'd seen it in the cell, he'd seen it at the end of the Yotsuba incident, he'd seen it yesterday in his experiment... but now it was much more predominant than usual. The red. Light's eyes had always had a tiny flicker of red in them. But at the moment, they were positively crimson, nearly turning the whole iris a dark mixture of brown and red. Ryuzaki knew exactly why, not that he'd ever say it. He wouldn't admit it. But that didn't make it any less real. His crimson, narrow eyes frowning as he thought, then flickered back to chocolaty brown again, then back to red. They reminded him so much of B's ruby coloured eyes… Ryuzaki sighed. Why must you make me do this Light...?

---

Light's POV

Ryuzaki held his arm out, forcing Light to stop. He had absolutely no idea where they were now. Ryuzaki had taken them off the path and seemed to be weaving his own through the towering trees. The clouds had covered up the sun with their steely grey covers, casting a shadow across the leaf strewn park.

"Through here" Ryuzaki said, crouching down to crawl through a small gap between a bush.

"Are you serious! What are you doing!" Light hissed after the figure crawling through the opening.

"Just follow me" Ryuzaki replied bluntly. Light frowned. These were his good pants... Light rolled his eyes and begrudgingly followed. He crawled through the small opening, feeling the branches scraping his back, and dodged a leaf that tried to poke his eye. What the hell was so special about this freaking hole...Oh wow.

Light crawled out of the tunnel to find himself standing in what appeared to be a small grove. It was about ten meters long, twelve meters wide, and made of tightly packed together maple trees and dark bushes. The maples formed a canopy above them, a few small holes where the season had stolen away the leaves. Narrow shafts of light filtered through these gaps, giving the illusion the golden shafts were forming intricate patterns across the dead leaves littering the ground. He could smell the slightly damp scent of old leaves in the light breeze as he stood staring at the scene before him. His feet sunk into the spongy ground slightly as he took a step forward. In the very centre stood a tall, thick, towering, glossy tree, easily twice as thick as all the others around them. It was...

"This place it beautiful..." Light spoke in awe. Ryuzaki glanced around the grove, a faint grin on his face.

"It is isn't it" He smiled, as if lost in a memory.

"This is amazing! How did you even find it Ryuzaki?" Light asked.

"I'm very good at finding things that are hidden away from sight like this" Ryuzaki said in his usual monotone. Light deliberately ignored the double meaning...

"Well I'm glad you did, I love this place!" Light laughed. Stop being a suck up. I'm not! It's only a few trees you know. I don't care it's beautiful. Whatever... when we rule this world we can have all the beauty we want.

Light looked up from his internal debate to find Ryuzaki right in his face. He jumped in surprise.

"You're very jumpy today Light" Ryuzaki pointed out.

"Sorry, I'm not too sure why I am but I keep zoning out today" Light lied. Ryuzaki blinked, then nodded slowly. The sun must have broken through the clouds at last, because the clearing suddenly lit up with a warm afternoon light. The light bathed Ryuzaki's body, making him glow in their rays.

"Hmmm..." Ryuzaki sighed happily as the warmth of the sun washed over him. He tilted his back, letting the light fall along his pale neck gracefully, absorbing its warmth. The beams of light shone through his midnight hair, giving it streaks of gold in his silken strands. Light's heart skipped a beat at the sight of it. He was so gorgeous... Light stepped forward into the shaft of sunlight and gently took Ryuzaki by the waist. Ryuzaki's coal coloured eyes blinked open and stared at the teen. Light could almost see the gears whirring in his mind, trying to figure out what Light was doing. He really was a dope with this...

"You really are beautiful... you know that right" Light looked deep into Ryuzaki's obsidian eyes as he spoke, never once breaking contract. Ryuzaki tilted his head to the side, as if slightly confused about something. He thought hard for a second.

"...As are you" Ryuzaki eventually whispered. Light smiled his first genuine smile in such a long time, it was hard to remember the last real one. He took Ryuzaki into his arms and pressed him to his chest in the deepest, heartfelt embrace he could muster. Light placed his lips lightly against the pale man's throat, letting them brush against the smooth skin as softly as a butterfly's wing on a rose petal. There was a small moment of hesitation before Ryuzaki returned the gesture, letting a slender hand run up Light's neck and entwine into his hair. Light shivered as he felt Ryuzaki's delicate thumb run back and forth along the base of his skull. Light wrapped his arms around Ryuzaki's slender frame, once again feeling just how delicate the strange man was. It felt like he was nothing more than a twig that could snap at any moment given a strong gust of wind. Like a pale porcelain doll.

I may vomit... Oh shut up Kira. And don't do the Snape voice, it's creepy. Make me. Oh, that's right, you can't can you? I mean it! I'm trying to have a private moment here and you're ruining it! Nothing you do is private, I'm in here too remember…

Light ignored the voice and nuzzled into the crook of Ryuzaki's warm neck. He wished they could stay this way forever, undisturbed by all the shit the world kept throwing at them, and just grow old. Light could just see it. Years had passed, Ryuzaki and Light were both happily together, maybe even married, life would just be perfect. They would just live forever in their perfect world, free from crime and hate, and be gods!

...No... Ryuzaki would never want that... He doesn't want to be like...like...us...

All the more reason to...you know what? I'm not even going to bother anymore. You know where I'm going with this. Unfortunately yes, and once again I'll remind you that's not going to happen. Says who? Says me! Now stop talking like that! Whatever...

"...Red..." Ryuzaki's voice was so minute Light had only just heard it.

"Huh? What was that Ryuzaki?" Light asked.

"Oh...nothing, just thinking aloud again. It doesn't matter" Ryuzaki shrugged. "Sit"

Light suppressed a disappointed grunt as Ryuzaki slipped from his arms and crouched at the base of the tree, motioning for him to do the same. Sit? That is not sitting... no shit...

Light, hoping the leaf litter wasn't too damp, sunk to the floor before Ryuzaki. He was glad to find it wasn't. There was a brief moment hesitation before Ryuzaki wrapped his slender arms around Light's waist. Light was actually kinda surprised by this. Usually he'd be the one to do all the...intimate sort of stuff. But he actually liked the feeling of Ryuzaki's body against his, no matter how bony the odd man was.

"The sun feel's nice… I haven't been out in the sun for a very long time" Ryuzaki hummed contently, the golden ray's bathing both his and Light's bodies.

"Heh, I can tell" Light smiled, looking at the white hands locked around his waist.

"I wish I'd thought of doing this sooner…" Ryuzaki sighed. Why…did he sound sad saying that?

"Well, maybe we can do this again another time we're free, or you get the sudden urge?" Light suggested. Ryuzaki remained silent.

"So…what are we doing?" Light asked after a moment.

"…I'm not sure. I didn't plan this far ahead to be honest" Ryuzaki laughed awkwardly.

"Well…do you want to do something?" Light blinked up at the man above him.

"What do you suggest?" Ryuzaki tilted his head to the side.

"Hmm…how about…lets play the question game" Light suggested the first thing that came to his head. The question game? What are you, a 12 year old girl? Shut up it's all I can think of!

"The question game?" Ryuzaki asked, confused.

"Well, it's a game where we ask each other questions about things. And you have to answer no matter what. And if you refuse to answer…the other person gets to do something nasty to you" Light explained, making the last bit up because he knew otherwise Ryuzaki would just say 'What if I refuse to answer?'

"Oh, and no unreasonable question either. So I can't ask you things like, what your real name is for instance. Questions like that are out of bounds so don't worry" Light reassured him.

"Hmm…" Ryuzaki hummed in thought.

"…I'm sorry, it's just… You know pretty much everything about me, and I know absolutely nothing about you! I don't even know if you have a family, where you went to school, I don't even know what nationality you are! And you know all that sort of stuff about me… Sorry, I just get curious" Light apologised.

"…It's understandable. Don't apologise…I do have family by the way" Ryuzaki said softly. "A brother…"

Light blinked up at him in surprise.

"You have a brother?" He said taken aback.

"Yes, we were twins. We were both sent to an orphanage after our parents died, so he was the only family I had left…" Ryuzaki trailed away.

"Was?" Light asked.

"…Yeah…was… well, to be honest, I don't actually know if he's alive or not anymore. He's in prison right now, and I don't have any way of finding out if Kira has killed him or not… so he could be dead right now and I wouldn't actually know…" Ryuzaki sighed, looking up at the leaf canopy above them.

"…Can I ask why he got sent to prison?" Light queried.

"…I suppose it can't do him any harm, I erased all evidence of him having existed, so you can't do anything with this information anyway" Ryuzaki shrugged. Light opened his mouth to protest, but was cut off before he could retort.

"If you really must know, he murdered three people, then tried to take his own life"

Light must have made a noise of surprise or something similar, because when Ryuzaki looked back down at him he smiled weakly.

"It was my fault really, don't blame him. I'm the one who drove him insane… I accidentally did a horrible thing I'd rather not talk about, and it drove him mad. I won't go into details about what he did because it was rather violent, but he decided if I was going to be the world's greatest detective, he would be the world's greatest criminal…so yes, I do have some family" Ryuzaki finished.

"What about your parents? What happened to them?" Light wanted to know.

"Surly it's my turn for a question isn't it? Stop trying to cheat Light it's impolite" Ryuzaki smirked.

"Oh, we're actually playing the game? Ok, you're right then, it's your turn. Ask something. By the way, it can be anything from stupid to sexual, I don't mind" Light shrugged.

"Mmm, alright then. Anything at all?" Ryuzaki's eyes glittered mischievously.

"Anything" Light nodded.

"Alright then. How old were you when you lost your virginity?"

Light cracked up laughing.

"Ahahaha! How did I know you'd ask that, oh my god! Ahah, mhmh, ok. I need to breath… Ok… I was fifteen and it was a girl from my school I had been dating a few months, if you must know you creep!" Light laughed loudly.

"Aw, that just makes me sad to think you lost your virginity ten years before I did age wise… you really get around with the girls don't you Light?" Ryuzaki giggled.

"What can I say, I'm a popular guy with the ladies… and apparently men" Light smirked and winked up at Ryuzaki.

"You're also very arrogant" Ryuzaki laughed.

"I know" Light smiled. "So I guess it's my question then"

"I guess so" Ryuzaki nodded. Light felt his confidence slipping when he thought of what he wanted to ask.

"Hmm…when…when did you first start…liking me in that way?" Light asked nervously.

"Oh, that was a while ago now that I think about it…you were aware that we played surveillance camera's in your room before we invited you to join the task force aren't you?" Ryuzaki asked.

"

… I figured you must have done something like that at some point, but no one officially told me…" Light scowled in annoyance, head on an angle Ryuzaki wouldn't quite catch his face.

"Hmh, I apologise about that, but it was necessary I hope you understand Light…well, anyway, only your father and I were permitted to view the videos. I think your father wanted to keep an eye on me for your sisters sake, but I never really payed attention to her anyway. Or your mother. I figured that if anyone in your household would be Kira, it would have to be you Light Yagami, the cameras in their room were just a precaution just in case you tried to… I can see the look on your face so I won't finish that sentence…" Ryuzaki caught glimpse of Light glare at the accusations.

"So only you and dad saw what I was up to…oh Christ, does that mean he saw me with the…those dirty magazines?" Light was afraid to ask. I hadn't considered dad would also be watching those tapes…

"Oh yes, he was quite shocked to say the least. From the point on, he would leave the room whenever you…did something of that nature" Ryuzaki smirked. Oh great…that means he watched me even when I was under the covers… Told you he would you horny basted…

"Oh don't look so embarrassed, I did the same thing at your age" Ryuzaki laughed.

"You still watched…" Light complained.

"…Well anyway, it was right after the cameras were installed I suppose. I had seen your picture in the profile Watari gave me of you, and thought you weren't not a rather handsome person for your age…but I suppose seeing an actual moving image made me re-evaluate my view. At first, of course I was only accusing you of being Kira, but then I began to notice you were rather attractive" Ryuzaki shrugged. "Buuut to be fair, then the thoughts ran more or less along the lines of 'How could a serial killer be so attractive?'"

"Ryuzaki!" Light protested. He was ignored

"And then when I met you in the university for real…I don't know. I don't know the right words to describe what I felt back then…or even currently…maybe it was easier when I didn't have any friends" Ryuzaki looked away, eyes darkening. Light glanced down to see Ryuzaki's hands fisting tighter against one another, giving a slight quiver. Light sighed and placed his hands over the top of the older man's.

"You need to stop wishing to be alone all the time Ryuzaki, you don't deserve to be all alone. No one does. Besides, I understand exactly what you mean. I don't know how to put… this…whatever it is…into words either. I mean, there are words for it, but none of them really seem to fit it just right…it is confusing isn't it?" Light said to the detective.

"…Yes…very" Ryuzaki agreed.

"My turn again?" Ryuzaki asked after a moment's silence.

"Seems so" Light nodded.

"Hmm…well, since you asked me first, when did you like me?" Ryuzaki asked.

"Oh…umm…I'm not exactly sure now that I really think about it…when I first met you as Hideki Ryuga, you more or less just kind of scared me a little, no offence-" "None taken, everyone else was thinking the same thing" Ryuzaki interrupted

"Except for that one girl, no idea what happened to her… well, anyway… now that I think about it properly, I think it was around about the time you called me your first friend, and I realised I actually wanted to be your friend too, I began to grow a bit closer to you" Light smiled at the memory.

"When we were chained together, I think I was starting to feel something then, but denied it so hard I forced myself to forget about it" Light thought back. Among other things… Yeah…sorry… It's fine, we had to do it…I just don't ever want to be that blank slate again…do you know how scary that was? I knew something was missing, that I wasn't the same person…I'd even lost my own name…we are never doing that again Light. Hopefully, we shouldn't have to…

"…You know what, I think I know the exact moment I knew I liked you. It was when I went looking for you the other night and found you standing out there in the rain. Seeing you like that…I realised how much it hurt me to see you like that… and I just wanted to do something to make you feel better, to hug you until you stopped scaring me with the way you were talking… then I tried to deny it again of course, because I felt like I shouldn't be feeling something like that towards another man…but then….well, when you kissed me, I think it was then I realised I didn't care that you were a guy, and just accepted I'd liked you for a long time…I was just too scared to do anything about it…sorry if that sounds stupid" Light blushed and turned away.

"No, not at all Light. It's still socially unacceptable for two men to be together, and you being a very social type of person would be bound to feel wrong with going against that ideal… I…I'm just….glad you did…" Ryuzaki smiled slightly.

"….Me too" Light smiled back at him. For once, Light was glad he was the one not trying to be in control of the whole situation, it felt nice to be able to just sink into Ryuzaki's surprisingly warm embrace and rest his head against the older man's chest. As always, Light could feel Ryuzaki's surprise at the gentle gesture, stiffening slightly as Light practically snuggled into him, but let out a little sigh and relaxed a few moments later. Light smiled as he felt Ryuzaki's lips brush the top of his head, laying a small kiss in the middle of his brown locks, before resting his face against Light's head. It just felt nice to be held for once…

"…It's funny really. I just realised something. Kira deliberately chose to represent the K for his symbol using the same style as I make my L, just to annoy me…but they didn't even notice something…" Ryuzaki mumbled, like this was all just a thought he wasn't meaning to speak aloud.

"Notice what?" Light asked.

"You can't have the K without the L in it. When you remove the L…the K is unrecognisable and meaningless…almost like it becomes something else entirely…did he ever realise this when he chose it?" L wondered aloud. Huh… Never even noticed, man we're stupid…

"I'm not sure. I didn't even notice it until now, but I suppose you're right. I think Kira would have only done it to annoy you, but that is ironic now that I think about it" Light said, choosing his words carefully.

"Yes, it is…Light…I'm going to ask something you're not going to like again, and I already know what your answer is going to be anyway, but I still feel like I need to ask just one last time…Light, are you Kira?"

Light's heart went cold. Ryuzaki sounded so…defeated. Because he knew what Light's answer was going to be anyway, but still wanted to try… It almost made him want to tell the truth…almost… Here, let me answer this…I think you'll like this.

"Ryuzaki, no matter what I say, you're still not going to believe me anyway…but, I'm going to say it anyway and hope you'll believe me for once. I am not Kira. I'm just Light…Light and Kira are two very different people, and if you chose not to see that, then I don't know what to say anymore… But I'm honestly not Kira…" Light spoke the words Kira gave him softly, seeing just how true they actually were. He, Light, wasn't Kira. Kira just happened to share the same body with him. But in all truth, they were two separate people. Sure, they were symbiotic people, but still separate… the fact they had the same ideals was just a coincidence. Light wasn't Kira, and Kira wasn't Light. It was only their body that was both.

Ryuzaki was silent, not making a single solitary noise. Light could barely even tell if he was breathing or not he was so quiet… Light could almost feel the older man's soul tearing… God I hate how much I'm hurting him… Well…we might have to get used to it. 'Cause he's either going to be dead quite soon, or you'll just keep breaking that fragile little heart of his until he kills you… I don't even know which is worse anymore…

"…I knew you'd say something like that… I just hope for your sake it's true because no matter what, it's my duty to find and capture Kira once and for all… I just want this all to be over" Ryuzaki muttered at last, barely more than a whisper in Light's ear. What else did he expect us to say…?

"Yeah…me too…Hey, you just cheated" Light said after a moment.

"Huh?" Ryuzaki finally looked at him again.

"You just stole my turn. That means I get two questions now" Light smiled softly.

"Oh…right…sorry about that. I got a bit carried away…" Ryuzaki returned the gesture half heartedly.

"That's ok, I'm used to it…now then…hmhm, I've got a question. This is going to sound weird, but you have to answer it remember? Now then, if you had to choose between kissing Aizawa and Matsuda, who would you pick? And you have to choose, otherwise…I'unno, something bad will happen if you don't kiss one of them" Light grinned wickedly, trying to distract the detective from his dark thoughts about Kira.

"Really Light? Would I kiss Mr Aizawa or Matsuda? That's an odd question…well, if I absolutely had to, I'd probably go with Matsuda" Ryuzaki shrugged.

"Really? Matsuda? Heh, at least he gets some action, fictional or not!" Light laughed. Even Kira snickered at the idea.

"Would you pick Mr Aizawa over Matsuda then?" Ryuzaki's mouth began to twitch into a small grin.

"Hey, it's not your turn yet! Stop trying to cheat…but yeah, I'd probably go with Matsuda to be honest, as long as he never told my father! Imagine that conversation!" Light chuckled.

"That would be quite hard to explain. I wonder how he'd take the knowledge of you and I being together like this…" Ryuzaki mused.

"I have absolutely no clue. It'd surprise him for sure, seeing as he's never had any reason to believe I was even into guys, but I've never really stopped to think about the afterwards bit…" Light pondered.

"I would like to believe he'd accept it, he doesn't seem the type to judge these types of things, but you've known him longer than I have so I can't say for certain…Anyway, it's still your turn. Can you try to ask something less childish this time though?" Ryuzaki snickered.

"Heheh, I'll try. Just let me think of something… I know. I want to know how you met Watari, if that's not too personal or anything" Light asked politely.

"Oh, no that's fine. It's not a particularly exciting story. After the incident with my parents, my brother and I were technically orphans, so we were taken into care at the local orphanage. Horrible place, it was like something from a bad book or movie… but, our carers began to notice how smart we were, and went to talk to someone about it. At the time, Watari was actually running an orphanage in England for the highly gifted, and heard about my brother and I. He took my brother and I in and practically raised us. But, he truly became Watari when he realised just how smart I was. Even though I had been very young at the time, I began looking into crimes outside of my studies as a hobbie when I was bored, and when Watari noticed how fast I had solved them all, and gotten them one hundred percent accurate, he suggested I do it for real. I started off with small things, things that usually the police just couldn't figure out because they didn't have the will too, but by about the age of twelve I started doing the real sort of things a detective could do. And then things have just sort of built from there I suppose… I'm not sure what else there is to it" Ryuzaki said, eyes staring off into the distance as he remembered it all.

"Huh, that's kind of lucky. If you hadn't met Watari, there would be no L…" Light pointed out.

"Yes…I suppose in that way I am rather fortunate…anyway, my turn again…" Ryuzaki smiled slyly.

"You say I'm allowed to ask anything right? And that you have to do what I ask yes?" He smirked wickedly.

"…Yeah?" Light said warily. What's he up to… Knowing him, something pervy…

"If I ask two things of you, but word them in the one question, does that count as two requests or one?" He asked again.

"…Depends what you're asking" Light eyed Ryuzaki suspiciously.

"Well, in that case, thinking about when I first liked you has made me want to watch you again. Also, you seem to enjoy being the seme of this relationship, so I want to try it and see if I enjoy it too" Ryuzaki said bluntly.

"W-what?!" Light blinked, blushing red. Told you.

"I would like to see you touch yourself, then try to be the more dominate one in sex. Is that agreeable to you?" Ryuzaki smirked.

"I-I, we are in a public place!" Light stammered.

"No one comes to this part of the park very often, especially before a storm like this one," Ryuzaki motioned at the black clouds that were threatening to cover the warm sun. "And unless you're very loud, no one will notice anyway"

"Still, I've never- I don't know how- we don't even have the thing I'd need to…you know…prepare…" Light blushed furiously.

"Oh, yes we do. I brought one with me. I was hoping for an opportunity to ask you of this to arise, so I brought it just in case" Ryuzaki grinned wickedly.

"…So that's what I can feel in your damn pocket…I've been wondering…" Light looked away.

"So…is that a yes?" Ryuzaki asked.

"…Fine" Light pouted.

Light turned to look at Ryuzaki to find the raven haired man's mouth twitching into a miniature smile.

"What? What's so fun-!" Light was cut off by Ryuzaki grabbing his jaw with his spidery white fingers and pulled Light's lips to his. Well this made a change from the shy demenor he had before! The angle was a little odd at first, Light was having to twist his neck at a rather uncomfortable angle to even reach the older man's lips, but he didn't want to break away. Light managed to shuffle down a bit, making Ryuzaki follow him, until he could actually kiss the raven haired man without breaking his own neck!

Light's heart was pounding hard in his chest at the gentle fierceness of Ryuzaki's lips against his own, powerful in their strokes, yet somewhat hesitant. Light was actually surprised by the unspoken emotions Ryuzaki was forcing into him, more powerful than any words ever could speak. But...he couldn't quite tell what they were... but he never could tell what was going through Ryuzaki's head anyway…or his own head for that matter…

Ryuzaki's hand tightened around Light's hip, pressing him closer still, deepening the kiss to a level Light couldn't even comprehend. It felt strange not being the one in control for once...but, surprisingly enough, Light really liked it! He liked Ryuzaki's hand intertwined in his mahogany hair, he liked being crushed into the older man's chest, he liked the way Ryuzaki's lips felt against his own. Light shivered as he felt Ryuzaki's tongue sweep against his bottom lip, slipping into his soft mouth. And Light was more than happy to comply.

Uhg...would you stop for one damn minute? You two are like rabbits… Never

Ryuzaki eventually pulled away for a breath, face growing steadily redder.

"Heh...you weren't kissing like that yesterday" Light smirked.

"I wanted to give it a go. Besides, you seemed to like it" Ryuzaki pointed out.

"Well I certainly wasn't complaining, you're actually quite good at it" Light grinned and kissed the raven haired man on the cheek.

"Well that's good, I was hoping you'd say that" Ryuzaki said silkily, running his thumb across Light's jaw thoughtfully.

"...Who said you could stop?" Light said, looking up into Ryuzaki's onyx coloured eyes.

"I never said I was..." Ryuzaki leant back down and placed his lips fiercely against Light's once more. Light squeaked with surprise as Ryuzaki practically attacked him, roughly grinding his mouth against Light's and crushing him in his grasp, all of that shy gentleness long forgotten. Light had forgotten just how strong these bony arms could be when they wanted to be. Ryuzaki's sweet tasting mouth was so skilful for someone who'd only just lost his virginity days before. Ryuzaki had been right about him being a quick learner. It was like he knew all of Light's weak point, his most sensitive spots, and was exploiting them all. He could feel Ryuzaki's tongue against his own, roughly dominating his body, making Light melt in his grasp.

You're actually letting him take over?! Thanks I noticed. For FUCK SAKE LIGHT! You don't let the enemy control you in anything ever! Do you want to look weak?! Why are you letting this happen?! Well one, because it feels fucking amazing, and two, wouldn't Ryuzaki find it suspicious if I never let him have a go? Being dominant and in control is exactly what you would want to do. ...True...but that doesn't mean I have to put up with this. This is my body too! Well at the moment I'M in control so shut the hell up and go away! I wasn't asking your permission!

You never learn do you? Fine, I'll go. But you'll regret this in the end... With a disgruntled sigh, Light felt Kira withdraw into the furthest depths of his mind with a scowl. Light, extremely happy Kira had obeyed him for once, grinned into the kiss and pressed himself further against Ryuzaki, forcing both their bodies firmly against the trunk of the tree. He felt Ryuzaki tugging at his jacket and moved his arms so the heavy material could slide off around him. He had a very brief flash of concern for the clothing as it was tossed away, but that was almost immediately gone as he felt Ryuzaki's hands slid up under his shirt to caress his bare chest. Light broke away from the kiss with a shallow gasp as Ryuzaki's spidery fingers found his sensitive buds and stroked them. Ryuzaki smirked and did it again. Light it his lip as another delicious stab shot through him.

"And you were laughing at me for being sensitive" Ryuzaki murmured.

"Heheh...sorry for being...a hypocrite then" Light said breathily. To be honest, Light was finding it really hard not to just grab Ryuzaki and take him right then. But something stopped him, other than the fact it felt really good. A small voice, unlike Kira's, told him to let Ryuzaki do this. Not that he was complaining. Not at all. Light was enjoying this new side of Ryuzaki. But he felt like he should let this happen… ah whatever, he didn't mind as long as it felt good.

"Now then… are you going to keep to the deal?" Ryuzaki asked, a slightly husky tone in his voice that made Light shiver.

"…Y-yeah…you can watch. But what are you going to be doing while you watch?" Light asked breathlessly.

"Nothing, just watching…unless you want me to do something" Ryuzaki murmured. Light let out a little whimper as Ryuzaki grazed his teeth across his earlobe, sending little sparks of desire skittering through his body.

"Ah- mmf…I don't care, do whatever you like. But if you're planning on topping after this I suggest you don't do anything too strenuous. It really does take a lot out of you being on top" Light tried to explain to the detective, but it was hard to think straight right now…

"Hmm…in that case, I think I'll just watch for now. You can help me with my problem later" Ryuzaki practically purred.

"O-ok…" Light tried not to whimper as Ryuzaki continued to play with his sensitive buds. He could feel his pants getting almost unbearably tighter by the second as Ryuzaki stroked his bare skin, occasionally licking or nibbling his neck and ear as Light's heart pounded in his chest. He needed to be touched…badly…

He hadn't even realised he's already begun to touch himself through the thick material of his pants. Light just sort of…looked down and noticed his own hand rubbing against the hard bulge in his trousers. When did I…He barely even registered it was him doing it, rather than Ryuzaki…all he knew was that it felt good… He could feel the heat rising in his cheeks as the older man sucked on the side of his neck, tongue flicking out across the now reddening skin, then bit him softly. Light couldn't help the little whimper of painful pleasure that shot from the rough contact.

"Oh? Did you like it when I did that Light? I thought you wouldn't…did you like it Light?" Ryuzaki asked huskily. Light didn't really know how to answer that properly, all he could do was let out a low moan and rub the front of his pants a bit harder.

"That doesn't really answer my question now does it… I'll ask again. Does Light like it when I do this?" Ryuzaki murmured, an almost animalistic tone of desire lacing his usually flat voice. Light half yelped, half moaned as Ryuzaki bit his sensitive neck again hard.

"Ahh-Yes!" Light gasped, unable to stop the control Ryuzaki had over his body right now. This is just disgusting Light…you're acting like a slut… Like you're not enjoying this too! …I'm not enjoying you submitting to L like this…

"That's good…because I'm not stopping" Ryuzaki smirked and ran his tongue across the pair of crescent marks he had left in Light's skin. It's not like I wanted you to stop… Aaaaand theeere's the slutty part…

Oh wait, never mind… this is the slutty part… Kira commented snidely as Light pushed his hand along his zipper and began to attempt to free his straining member. Shut up for once and just enjoy It, Kira… Light ignored Kira's noise of protest as he unzipped his pants, showing off his crimson underwear for Ryuzaki to see.

"Mmm, your face is so red Light. Are you getting all shy on me? Or are you enjoying this a lot" Ryuzaki asked seductively.

"A-are you trying to talk dirty to me?" Light smirked through his pounding heart, breath coming out a lot more heavily than he intended.

"So what if I am? I like watching you touch yourself, it makes you looks so attractive…so vulnerable…it's quite a turn on" Ryuzaki murmured throatily. Did he just call us vulnerable? That's it, I'm out… Kira paused Light's hand long enough to escape his mind, leaving Light to himself once again. Good, stay there until we're done!

"You'd find anything I do a turn on you pervert!" Light laughed shakily, hand pressing against his own hard length as he tried to think of the best way to do this…

"Why must everyone insist on calling me a pervert? I just like to observe things…there's a difference" Ryuzaki grinned.

"Not much…" Light retorted.

"What? When I observe, I only look. If I were a pervert, I might have done other things, like touch myself when I watched you when you thought no one was watching…" Ryuzaki purred silkily. For some reason, the way he said all this just sent another delicious jolt of desire through his body…and he couldn't help himself anymore. Light's hands dipped into his own boxers and pulled his aching erection free from its confines. All rational thoughts had flown from his mind as he wrapped his firm fingers around his member, giving his hot shaft a small tug. He gave a soft moan as he began to rub his own aching member.

"Heh, and someone was teasing me for being eager…" Ryuzaki chuckled.

"S-shut up!" Light stammered. He was starting to feel a little self conscious masturbating in front of Ryuzaki like this…but he'd done more intimate things with him… it just felt weird that he was watching…yet fucking hell was it also a turn on! Light could feel the heat flooding his veins as he touched himself, turning his cheeks crimson as Ryuzaki started sucking the other side of his neck now, leaving big red marks across his skin. Light whimpered and began to actually pump himself at his regular pace as Ryuzaki bit his ear lightly, dragging his teeth across his sensitive skin, then licking alone the side of his throat. It's like he knows all my weak points god! You never exactly hid them….. I thought you said you didn't want to be here! I-I don't! It's not my fault we share the same god damn body space! Then stop complaining. Unless you're enjoying this too you perve. How am I the pervert- IT'S MY DICK TOO! You're still enjoying this though, am I right? …I just wish you were doing it with someone else… freaking Matsuda would be better than L survival wise… Oh god no, don't even give me that image right now I'm trying to have fun here. Unless you're here to help, bugger off. Besides, it's not like you haven't helped me before…we could do it like we used to…just pretend L isn't here …This is so unfair…you know I can't help it when you do that…

Light gasped with surprised pleasure as his hand began to move faster without his permission. He felt the familiar sensation of his doppelgänger controlling his limb with ease as their shared body shuddered with the extra pleasure. You ever mention this ag…again and I will ki-ill you I swear to god… Kira's voice seemed slightly uneven, as if even he were having a hard time controlling himself. I'm not going to say a word… who would I tell anyway? I don't know, just saying…

"God you make such amazing noises Light…" Ryuzaki murmured in his ear breathily. Uhg, that just ruined this for me…..you know what, fuck it. He's gonna be dead soon anyway, I can block him out just this once. He is NOT going to be dead Kira! Yeah yeah, whatever you say… j-just shut up and let us touch our body… I wasn't stopping…

Light didn't know how to reply to Ryuzaki without sounding like an idiot, so he didn't even try. Words seemed impossible to form anyway. All he could manage to do was not cry out in delight when Ryuzaki's fingers began to play with his hard nipples once again. But he did subconsciously began to pick up the pace a little, the need for contact, even his own/Kira's, growing too much to ignore. God w-we haven't done this in so l-long Light… Kira's voice still sounded like it was trying, and failing, to keep his usual hard demeanour… but the tiny quiver that leaked through his words was so blatantly obvious to Light it made him want to giggle. Kira usually managed to keep his composure through their trades…

"Mmf- fuck- ahh" Light couldn't help but gasp as Kira kicked up the pace just that one final knot, bringing his body that bit closer to the verge of release.

"Mmm is Light about to cum is he? Usually you could go longer than this…are you enjoying this a fair bit more than you usually would Light?" Ryuzaki murmured silkily and mindlessly, as if he wasn't entirely aware of what he was saying even as he spoke. Either way, it sent a delicious lurch through Light's veins as his heart beat spiked. Kira let out a soft moan, using Light's mouth, as their climax loomed…

Suddenly, Light felt Ryuzaki's teeth sink into his sensitive neck once again hard, on the side that was the least marked. The sudden rush of pleasure from the pain sent Light hurtling over the edge. Ryuzaki covered Light's mouth just in time as he finally came, screaming into his palm as his orgasm hit. Light's muffled cry sounded between the pair as Light spurt his sticky white liquid from his slit, barely missing his pants by less than a centimetre, splattering the leaf litter with his fluids. His body jerked in time with Kira's continued pumps of his shaft, making him moan and mewl against the palm pressed to his lips. It wasn't as full on as having actual sex would have been, but damn did it feel good…

"We're in a public place Light, you shouldn't scream so loudly…" Ryuzaki murmured in his ear. Light's only response was to whine softly as he came down from his climax. Holy shit that was good…I needed to do that, it's been ages since you let me do that to myself… I think I will a bit more often, Jesus I forgot how hard you go on us… too bad you can't bite my neck like that though… …Well, I suppose I could try something like that next time we have a wet dream or some shit… Cool…

Ryuzaki slid his hand off of Light's mouth and let him fall exhaustedly against his body, Light's breath coming out in short pants. He hummed with amusement as placed a small kiss on the nape of Light's neck. Light let out a weak smile and fell against his body, practically cuddling into the detective.

"And you wondered why I wanted to watch…you go very roughly on yourself you know" Ryuzaki laughed softly.

"I…I know" Light panted.

"Although…I do regret deciding not to do anything about myself until after we visit the bathroom for you…" Ryuzaki said, a slight strain in his voice. It was only then Light actually realized what the thing poking his back was…

"Do…you want me…to deal with it?" Light asked breathlessly.

"…I would, but I don't think I would have enough energy to do the other thing I really want to do afterwards…" Ryuzaki said awkwardly.

"Oh, ok then. Just give it a minute then, it should go away" Light told him.

"That was my plan…" Ryuzaki sighed.

---

Ryuzaki's POV

"Hey, it's starting to rain" Light pointed out. Ryuzaki looked up at the sky, which had turned rather overcast within the last few minutes, and flinched with surprise as a rain drop hit him right in the eye. With a little noise of annoyance, Ryuzaki rubbed his face irritably at the water in his eyeball. Light snickered. Ryuzaki glared at him and quickened his steps.

"Y-you ok there?" Light giggled.

"I'm just fine…" Ryuzaki grumbled.

Ryuzaki shouldered open the door to the public bathroom and stepped inside, holding the door for Light. Light nodded appreciatively and followed him through. The place looked about as much as you'd expect from a government run bathroom, graffiti scribbled onto the doors with permanent markers by teenagers that had gotten bored, smudged and dull mirror, a bit of moss growing between some of the bricks by the door… the sink and urinals looked clean enough though… which is a plus Ryuzaki supposed… He also noted, to his utter delight, the actual door leading in and out had a lock on it, meaning they wouldn't be disturbed…he used it at once.

"Well…classy" Light said sarcastically.

"If you would rather do this outside in the trees while it's raining go right ahead" Ryuzaki retorted.

"Well, fair enough when you put it that way… so, you have the…thing?" Light asked, a tiny trace of nervousness in his voice. Ryuzaki nodded and passed him the object in his pocket. Light took it and eyed it warily.

"It's not as bad as it looks…it's just a little uncomfortable…hey, I did it for you twice now, it's your turn to try it" Ryuzaki told the teen.

"Uhg fine, I'll be out in a minute…" Light sighed and disappeared into the closest stall. Ryuzaki watched him go without another word and turned to look at himself in the mirror.

What does Light see in this…? Ryuzaki thought to himself as he stared at his reflection. The only possible good looking feature he could discern from his body was perhaps his hair, which he knew was soft and shiny…but the rest of him? Why did Light like his sickly pale sheen of his skin, the blackened circles under his eyes, his skeletal thin structure of his body, the oppressive hunch in his back knocking a good few centimetres off his height…he didn't even have an interesting voice. It was dull and boring, pretty much emotionless unless he actually worked at it… he wasn't beautiful…he wasn't special…heck, he wasn't even normal! What did Light see in this…

Ryuzaki ran his finger through his raven coloured hair, nervously scratching himself as he grew really self conscious. He'd never really given his appearance much thought until now, he didn't like feeling so inadequate…especially compared to the man in the stall behind him. Now he was beautiful…what was Ryuzaki compared to an image of perfection like that? He began to anxiously rub his face, becoming very unsure of himself… B was more beautiful than Ryuzaki had been. He'd actually taken care of himself…well, at least he did while A was still around… A had forced B to actually take care of himself. B had been much like L, not caring what he looked like, but for very different reasons. L just didn't care, too busy with his work to care for himself, and Watari did most of that for him anyway. B on the other hand…the loss of their parents had hit him hard. Before he became close to A, B was in a worse condition than a wounded animal… L sighed, pressing his hands over his eyes at the awful memory of his broken brother. He always blamed himself for their deaths…I should have convinced him otherwise instead of working all the time… At least A did for some time…and then he…

Ryuzaki yelped with shock as he felt hands on his side and automatically dropped to the ground with surprise. He heard the intruder make a noise of surprise as he dropped away. Ryuzaki's first instinct was to bite whoever this was, but even he knew that was a low move. So he did the next best thing, side swiping his foot so he knocked the intruder's legs out from under him.

"OW! RYUZAKI WHAT THE HELL!"

"Huh?" Ryuzaki blinked. Light groaned with pain, flat on his back against the grimy tiles.

"Oh…forgive me Light…I didn't realise it was you…" Ryuzaki apologised awkwardly.

"Who the hell else was it going to be…! Fuck that hurts!" Light groaned as he sat up, rubbing the back of his head.

"I…I don't know… I'm sorry, I was thinking about something else" Ryuzaki muttered, holding a hand out for Light.

"I can tell…" Light grumbled and let Ryuzaki pull him to his feet. "What were you even thinking about that made you kick me like that…?"

"Oh…um…well…I was just…mostly I was just looking at myself in the mirror" Ryuzaki stammered shyly.

"What for? Admiring that pretty little face of yours were you?" Light said teasingly.

"…Doing the exact opposite actually" Ryuzaki told him.

"Huh? What do you mean?" Light asked.

"…I was trying to figure out what you even see in me…" Ryuzaki said nervously.

"What I see in you?" Light repeated. Ryuzaki nodded.

"That's a stupid question. Why, don't you think you're good enough or something?"

Ryuzaki slowly nodded again.

"Ryuzaki…" Light turned the detective around to face him, eyes warm and brown.

"You're beautiful, you shouldn't doubt that even for a moment. Yes, you're a little weird, but I like that. Normal people are boring. Why did you suddenly start thinking like this?" Light said to him, brushing a strand of his black hair out of his eyes for him, hand lingering momentarily on his pale cheek.

"I don't know…whenever I think too hard about your appearance, I guess I start questioning mine…" Ryuzaki glanced away.

"Well don't. You're beautiful Ryuzaki, don't ever question that" Light smiled warmly, meaning every last word. Why is it I believe you when you say things like this… you really do believe I'm… Ryuzaki grinned slightly, heart fluttering. He actually meant it, it wasn't a lie… he liked hearing the truth from the boy, it sounded so pretty on his tongue. Like honey.

"Although, you should try to stand up straight more often. I feel so tall against you even though we're exactly the same height" Light laughed. Ryuzaki blinked for a moment, not realising he was actually hunched over again, and straightened his back out. It gave a loud, rather relieving crack, and Ryuzaki actually made a little noise of relief as the pressure in his spine he hadn't noticed was there disappeared.

"Much better! Now I can actually look eye to eye with you" Light chuckled. Even Ryuzaki smiled at this.

Ryuzaki felt a little burst of confidence surge through him once again, much like he'd had before. Well, if he was going to do it, it was now or never… Light made a little noise of surprise as Ryuzaki leaned forward and kissed him, arms siding around Light's waist and pulling him close. Ryuzaki was oddly proud to catch the arrogant teen off guard for once, it was nice to be on the other end of the emotion for once. Light let out a soft sigh and leaned into Ryuzaki's touch, kissing him softly back. Heat began forming in Ryuzaki's cheeks as he deepened the touch, that overwhelming desire for touch that had nearly driven him insane before already starting to come back. Ryuzaki was almost surprised when he opened his eyes partly and noticed he had Light pressed up against the wall, none to gently either. He felt like common courtesy might dictate that he ease up a little at this point and try to be more gentle, but the fire beginning to build in his veins told him to forget all of that. Seeing Light up against the wall, pressing against his body, there wasn't a chance in hell he was going to go softer on the boy. Especially since Light seemed to be enjoying it, hands digging into Ryuzaki's jumper, fisting in as Ryuzaki deepened their kiss, Light wanted this just as badly as he did. Ryuzaki ran a silken hand along the hem of Light's black long sleeved top and slipped it under the thin material, running his finger up his soft stomach. He felt a tiny tremor go through Light as he stroked his chest, simply running his hands across the muscles as he found them. He remembered faintly how when Light had done this to him, a trail of warm prickles had followed in his fingers wake, so Ryuzaki tried to replicate this as best he could. He highly doubted he could be anywhere near as good at Light at this, but it was worth a shot.

Light broke away from their kiss to let out a small gasp as Ryuzaki began to brush his fingertips over his left nipple. He quickly shut himself up though, almost as if he were embarrassed to have let out the noise. Now that just wasn't good enough… Before Light could attempt to get Ryuzaki to kiss him again, the older man buried his head into the crook of Light's neck and licked the still slightly red patch against his throat he had mauled before. Thankfully, his earlier ravaging hadn't desensitised the area, as Light let out a small moan and gripped Ryuzaki's back tighter as Ryuzaki ran his wet tongue across the salty skin.

"Nng…" Light grunted as Ryuzaki began running his other hand along the rim of his trousers. Ryuzaki pressed his body further against Light, effectively crushing him into the wall, and let his hands roam further. His left, toying with Light's sensitive chest and nipples, the right, happily discovering Light's pants were already undone from his visit to the stalls. Light let out a soft groan as Ryuzaki slid his hand between his trousers and underwear began rubbing him through the front of his clothing.

"Ah-ah fuck- mmf- R-Ryuzaki? You locked the d-door didn't you?" Light asked shakily.

"Mmhmm" Ryuzaki hummed, too busy sucking on Light's neck to answer properly. He felt a tremor quake through the teen as he started to rub his steadily hardening erection through his underwear, feeling Light's stiffening shaft under his hand. Ryuzaki glanced up at Light and had to admire the flushed redness of his cheeks, the way his eyes were squeezed tightly shut in pleasure, the way his mouth didn't quite seem to know how to close all the way… and god did it turn Ryuzaki on. He pushed Light's top up just enough to expose his erect, pink nipples, and with a small smirk, lean down and licked the closest one. Light cried out with delight as Ryuzaki trailed his wet tongue across the sensitive bud, leisurely feeling his way along the hot surface. He felt Light's hands grip the back of his head hard, pulling at his hair slightly, forcing his mouth further onto his chest. If Ryuzaki were in a more dominating mood, he might have scolded Light for the interference, but to be honest, seeing Light this desperate for his touch turned Ryuzaki on just as much. He let out a little hum of amusement and began to lightly suck on the teen's nipple.

"Aahh yess~" Light moaned mindlessly, hand tightening in Ryuzaki's hair. God did Light make such arousing noises…a small though crossed Ryuzaki's mind which he rather enjoyed the idea of, he just hoped Light wouldn't be too angry with him for it afterwards… Ryuzaki began rubbing his hand across Light's now fully erect shaft through the cloth of his underwear, feeling the tiny wet spot on the end from were a small trickle of pre cum was escaping, rewarding him for submitting to him like that. And he decided, if Light begged for it enough, that's when he'll take him… Light was going to kill him for this.

"Mmf! Ryuzaki, what a-are you waiting for?" Light asked breathlessly as Ryuzaki continued to run him through his clothing.

"I'm waiting for you to do something for me" Ryuzaki told him silkily.

"L-like what?" Light frowned as best he could.

"Like…I don't know… beg for it?" Ryuzaki said wickedly.

"B-beg?! Are you serious?! W-I am not begging like a chick!" Light cried out indignantly. Ryuzaki didn't fail to notice the small slip up.

"Oh, that's too bad then…"

Light let out a small whine of annoyance as Ryuzaki withdrew his hand from within his pants and pulled his mouth away from his sensitive nipples.

"Ryuzaki!" Light complained. Ryuzaki raised an eyebrow at the brown eyed boy smugly.

"Yes Light?" He asked innocently. Light glared at him for a moment angrily, shifting his weight slightly. Ryuzaki caught onto what he was doing in an instant. Light let out a little gasp on indignation as Ryuzaki pinned his hands to the wall, immobilising him. Although, he didn't realise that he had also pushed his thigh in between Light's legs in doing so, and felt the desperate boy give a small grind on his body.

"Oh no, I'm not letting you do it yourself this time" Ryuzaki scolded him, drawing his leg away.

"Ryuzaki come o-on! This is just cruel!" Light groaned weakly.

"All I need is one little thing from you Light, then I'll play with you all you want" Ryuzaki cooed seductively in his ear, making the teen shudder.

"Nng, you're a sadistic bastard you know that?" Light tried to laugh breathily, and failed.

"I know. It's fun. I get why you like doing this to me so much now" Ryuzaki snickered. Just to tease him that one step further, Ryuzaki leaned forward as if he were about to kiss the boy passionately…then only lightly brushed his lips over the younger boy's. Light tried to grasp hold of Ryuzaki's lips, but they slipped away before he had a chance.

"I can do this all day Light…" Ryuzaki smirked mischievously, deliberately brushing his thigh against Light's painfully hard bulge.

"Ah! Fuck- you're an- ehhh- fine, fucking please!" Light cried out.

"I'm sorry? I didn't quite catch that" Ryuzaki said smugly. He loved the look of utter defeat on the boy's flushed face, it was so arousing to see him so under his control…

"I-I said please Ryuzaki! Please…touch me! Something!" Light begged at last. Ryuzaki smirked with victory.

"Much better…as you wish Light Yagami…" Ryuzaki purred. Light moaned with delight as Ryuzaki began grinding his thigh against Light's hardness straining to escape the confines of his pants, licking him from throat to ear in a single glide of his tongue. Light's hands tightened into fists under Ryuzaki's iron grip, enjoying the feeling of trapping Light far too much to let him escape yet. His own erection had returned once again, and he needed touch just as badly as Light did…but there was no way he was going to reveal just how desperate he was for contact…

Light sucked in a sharp little breath as Ryuzaki did the first thing he could think of to deal with both problems, and thrusted his hips up against the teen's hard member. Light's head flopped against Ryuzaki's neck, as if unable to support its own weight, and mindlessly began to grind back into Ryuzaki…

The sound of a doorhandle being turned snapped Ryuzaki back into reality. He covered Light's mouth before he could utter another noise and turned towards the noise, praying that he'd locked it correctly… the door rattled as someone irritably tried to force the door open, then banged in with his fist.

"Goddamit! It must be broken or some shit… just my freaking luck!" A man muttered angrily to himself. "I'll just use the damn girls…if anyone catches me they'll think I'm a pervert…"

The pair stayed absolutely silent, save for their heavy breathing, until the sounds of the stranger receded into the light pitter patter of rain once again. Ryuzaki felt faintly guilty of trapping the stranger out in the rain…but they needed to space much more than he did at the moment.

"We should get off the wall…are you ok with sitting on the bench by the sink?" Ryuzaki asked the boy still pinned beneath him.

"Y-yeah, sure" Light nodded shakily. Ryuzaki regretfully let the younger male go, taking half a step back to allow the teen to peel himself from the now warm white tiles of the wall. Light rubbed his slightly red wrists for a moment before hopping up onto the bench about a meter away, which by happy coincidence was just a tiny bit above waist height, meaning Ryuzaki could easily do what he was about to do.

"Do you want me to take off my…" Light trailed away.

"If you want, I was going to do it myself, but I don't really mind…" Ryuzaki told him.

"…Actually…I want you to do it…please" Light added softly.

"Well, if you insist…" Ryuzaki murmured seductively, secretly glad Light had said this. Light's zipper was already undone from before fortunately enough, so it was only really a case of sliding one of the legs off around his foot. He didn't really need to take off his pants entirely, so he didn't bother. Besides, Ryuzaki liked the mental image better that way. Light lifted up his body weight for Ryuzaki to edge the expensive looking material down his hips. The detective slide the left leg off the end of Light's foot and pushed it to one side, casting an appreciative eye towards Light's crimson underwear. He could see Light's bulge straining against the oppressive material, a small wet dot over where his slit would approximately be from pre-cum. Ryuzaki captured the elastic of the red material and slide it down just enough to reveal Light's stiff shaft. Light bit his lip as Ryuzaki admired it momentarily before wrapping his slender fingers around his hard member. Light tried to cover his own mouth as the older man began to slowly run his hand up and down his eager shaft, trying not to cry out again. Ryuzaki quickly pulled the hand away. He didn't want to miss out on any of Light's cute little noises.

"Ryuzaki- haahh…if you keep doing that you'll make me cum!" Light panted, squirming under Ryuzaki's touch.

"What, already?" Ryuzaki asked in surprise. "I've only just started"

"Sorry…you're really good with your hands" Light apologised shakily.

"I suppose it can't be helped…I'd let you cum to, but then you'd be too tired to cum with me wouldn't it?" Ryuzaki murmured. Light nodded shortly.

"That's too bad…I enjoy watching you cum" Ryuzaki smirked wickedly. Light blushed slightly at this.

"Do you have any…stuff?" Light asked.

"Oh, yes of course. I figured you'd want your first time on the bottom to be as pleasant as possible…" Ryuzaki left a little edge in his voice, reminding Light that he hadn't done the same with his first time.

"Oh…sorry about that…I should have asked if you had any before…forgive me?" Light laughed sheepishly.

"Already did that first night. Now then…"

Light watched nervously as Ryuzaki reached into his pocket and pulled out the little thin bottle of lubricant they had used the night before. Holding the container between his thumb and index finger like he usually did, he began unscrewing the little blue cap to the object. Why the hell did Light put it on so tight? While Ryuzaki was busy concentrating on the lid, he felt a small tug on his jeans. He blinked and noticed Light's hands undoing his button for him, his golden fingers working rather nimbly to unzip his jeans.

Ryuzaki let the mildly warm liquid spread across his fingers as he pressed the tip of the bottle to his skin. He figured his pocket must have made it warm, because he defiantly remembered it being cold when Light had used it on him…Light made a small noise in the back of his throat as Ryuzaki ran his slick finger around the edge of his entrance, hands falling back to grip the edge of the bench. He subconsciously began to try and clench his legs together again, but Ryuzaki grabbed his right thigh with his free hand and separated them again. Going purely by the memory of what Light had done to him, Ryuzaki slowly began to push his finger inside Light.

"Ahh- that feels so weird…" Light gasped.

"Yeah, it does…you'll get used to it soon…" Ryuzaki told the boy.

"Mmf, I hope so…" Light muttered, squirming slightly. After about a minute or so, when Light finally began relaxing his body, Ryuzaki pressed another digit into him. Light made a sound that was almost like a cross between a startled gasp and a moan, gripping the bench tighter. Ryuzaki paused for a moment, allowing Light to get used to the feeling before moving his fingers again. It dawned on Ryuzaki that maybe he should perhaps try and find if Light had that odd little spot in him, make this whole thing feel a lot better, because he kept having all these doubts on whether or not he was doing this thing right. Before he slid a third finger in, he began moving his fingers back and forth, feeling Light's tight walls for anything that might be the thing he was looking for… Light looked like he wanted to ask what he was up to, but couldn't quite form the words. Ryuzaki decided he may as well put the third finger in at last, it might make the spot easier to find. Light made another odd noise of pain as Ryuzaki pressed a third digit inside him, stretching him in a way Light had never been on the receiving end of before. Ryuzaki felt a little sorry for Light, but then quickly reminded himself that Light hadn't exactly been all that lenient on him when they had done this…

"NNG, HOLY FU-AAHHH!" Light suddenly threw his head back and cried out. Ryuzaki nearly jumped with surprise.

"A-are you ok Light?" He asked with concern.

"Fucking yes I am, keep doing that!" Light begged. Doing what? I don't remember what I did… oh, did I somehow find that…I wasn't even… Just to make sure, he ran his finger over the spot he had just passed again. Sure enough, Light moaned loudly, eyes squeezed tightly shut as he cried out again.

"Ahhh yes thereee~" He moaned, all of that dignity he'd been trying hard to hold onto slipping in an instant. Ryuzaki smirked evilly and began to press the little nub he now felt quite hard, putting a fair amount of pressure on the point.

"Haaahhh fucking hell Ryuzakiii! I-ah-I'll cum if you keep do-oh fuck- doing that!" Light warned breathlessly, a small drop of saliva escaping the corner of his mouth. Ryuzaki let out a little huff of laughter and drew his fingers out of Light, who made a tiny noise of protest at this.

"I guess I'll move ahead to the next thing then. I don't want you to have all the fun now do I?" Ryuzaki smirked, whipping the saliva off the young boy's face. Ryuzaki pulled his jeans down a bit further, Light having already pulled them partway down, and pushed his black underwear down at last, freeing the erection that had been straining against them for the past ten minutes. He squeezed another small dollop of the lubricant into his palm and rubbed it against his hard shaft, actually letting out a soft gasp at the spike of pleasure it drew. He hadn't noticed until now how badly he'd needed to be touched there…

"Damn it Ryuzaki, stop feeling yourself and get back here!" Light complained as Ryuzaki continued to rub his own member.

"Heh, s-someone sounds a little desperate there" Ryuzaki laughed, heart pounding way too hard to be healthy.

"Just shut up and do it already…" Light pursed his lips.

"As you wish Yagami…"

Light hissed as Ryuzaki pressed the tip of his penis into his rear, only inserting it about two inched or so before pausing. Oh god it feel good…I…I need to remember I could hurt Light here…but it feels so…focus!

"L-Light… relax. It'll hurt less if you don't tense" Ryuzaki told him.

"I didn't realise it hurt this much, damn!" Light growled.

"Hey, if I can do it without proper lubricant, you defiantly can with it" Ryuzaki said flatly.

"Oh yeah, right, now I'm really sorry about that…ok, I'm trying to relax…" Light let out a little pent up sigh. Ryuzaki felt Light's body slowly ease out of its tense state, but waited until he had permission to try and go in further.

"Ah…mmf…ok, I'm getting more used to it now I think…you can move" Light told him shakily. Ryuzaki nodded slightly and as gently as he could push his shaft deeper into him. Light winced, but not as badly as before. Ryuzaki felt bad that he was hurting Light, but he reminded himself the boy will get used to the feeling soon enough. He had hadn't he? Ryuzaki let out a soft moan as he finally got as far as he physically could go, completely sheathing himself inside Light. The insides of the teen felt much better than he had expected, although, to be fair, he didn't actually know what to expect in the first place seeing as he had nothing else to compare it too.

"Ryu…Ryuzaki…can you please move?" Light asked breathlessly. "I'm ready"

Oh thank god! Ryuzaki wrapped his hands around Light's waist and, as gently as he could, began moving his hips in small little thrusts. Light groaned and wrapped his legs around Ryuzaki's hips as he thrusted forward, effectively making him go deeper. Taking this as a good sign, Ryuzaki began to go a little harder, almost to the speed his own hot member was begging for. Light moaned and pressed himself into the mirror behind him, mouth hanging open slightly. Ryuzaki quickly remembered to try and find that little spot in the teen again and began to search for it once again in time with his thrusts.

"Ahhhhhhhhh Ryuzaki!" Light slurred in pleasure as Ryuzaki must have brushed past the point. Encouraged, Ryuzaki began aiming for that area each time he moved his hips. Light's hands clawing into his back told him he had it spot on. Ryuzaki's blood felt like it was on fire as adrenalin and pure ecstasy filled his veins, making him thrust into the younger boy harder as pleasure exploded in his body. He never imagined it would feel so good to have sex with someone, it was almost better that being on the bottom doing this! No wonder Light had enjoyed it so much, the feeling of tight walls enveloping his shaft, practically rippling around his sensitive member, it was too much. He felt bad about it, but all the teasing and the toying had taken its toll on Ryuzaki too, and he could feel himself coming closer to his climax with each little thrust. He dug his fingers into Light's back harshly as he repositioned him into a near upright position. Light automatically leaned forward to kiss Ryuzaki as he pounded into him, tongue brushing against the detective's in a wet embrace. Ryuzaki returned to kiss messily, concentrating too hard on the other task to care if he was neat or not. Either way, it still felt amazing.

Ryuzaki knew his orgasm was coming up fast, and from the noises Light was making, he couldn't be far off either. Ryuzaki slid on of his hands slowly down Light's waist and wrapped it around his member, making Light mewl with delight at the contact. He began to pump is fist up and down Light's shaft, which was already leaking pre-cum again. Light broke away from their wrestling tongues to cry out in pleasure as Ryuzaki rubbed him hard. Ryuzaki began thrusting harder into Light, all motions towards being gentle long since abandoned. Light was gasping and panting deliciously as Ryuzaki made him edge closer and closer to release. The detective realised the boy was going to cum before he did and did the one final thing he could think of. He bit Light on the neck so hard it very nearly drew blood.

"AAHHH FUUUCKK!" Light screamed as he finally orgasmed. Ryuzaki felt something warm hit his stomach through his clothing as the younger boy spurted white from his slit, twitching and jerking in delight as his body was pushed over the edge. Light cries of pleasure were the thing that got Ryuzaki to lose it at long last.

"Ah, aaah, fucking- gaahhhh!" Ryuzaki cried out as he came inside Light, shooting his fluids deep inside the boy beneath him. His entire body flooded with pleasure as he spurted a few thick streams of cum from his body, causing him to lose all control of his body whatsoever. He was vaguely aware that he was running his nails down Light's bare back, not even remembering having pushed his shirt up in the first place. His heart hammered wildly as he came down from his climax, barely even able to stand anymore.

"Ah…oh god… that was…better than I thought it…would be" Light panted heavily. Ryuzaki couldn't reply, his mouth didn't know how to work anymore. He flopped his head against Light's shoulder, panted hard, barely even able to stand straight anymore. He felt Light's chest vibrate with a small laugh as a hand rested against his hair.

"Eheh, you alright?" Light asked. Ryuzaki nodded into his neck tiredly. He slid his spent member from Light's body and very nearly collapsed to the floor with fatigue. Light snickered.

"Come on, get up here before you hurt yourself" He chuckled lightly. Again, Ryuzaki nodded and slid onto the bench beside Light exhaustedly. He leaned against the cool mirror, still panting hard, and shut his eyes against the harsh lights above him.

"Mhmhm! You swore again" Light giggled.

"I know…" Ryuzaki said wearily.

"…Maybe we should rest for a bit, you look like you're about to pass out" Light noted.

"I feel like I'm about to pass out…" Ryuzaki groaned.

"Heh, alright then. We'll give it a minute before we clean up then" Light smiled, face still flushed. Ryuzaki just nodded again. He felt like he could nearly pass out and sleep for a week…

"…Yeah dude, I'm on my way! I just kinda got trapped in the bathroom…"

Ryuzaki and Light both looked up in confusion at the muffled voice coming through the wall behind them.

"I don't have to tell you why, it's embarrassing!" The voice laughed breathlessly. Ryuzaki and Light looked at each other, not knowing what on earth to do.

"Fine…look, I'm on my way alright? I just kinda got locked out of the bathroom because two guys were having sex in there and had to use the girls…"

"Oh shit…" Light said as he stared at the wall.

"Yeah…totally. Every last word…look I don't wanna talk about it here ok? Ok, bye Taki…uhg thank god he's gone…like I needed him to hear me out of breath from doing that to myself…I need to get outta here before those two come out and see me…"

There was a moments silence before the door to the girl's bathroom slammed shut. Ryuzaki looked over at Light in horror. He couldn't believe they had actually been overheard having sex! That hadn't been in any of his scenarios for today… Light suddenly began laughing madly, smacking his head against the mirror behind him.

"Ahah, ahahahaha! Oh my god that's hilarious! He was totally enjoying listening to us!" Light cackled.

"That's mildly concerning…" Ryuzaki muttered.

"Oh, that's embarrassing and great at the same time! He was totally playing with himself ahaha! Oh, no more public bathroom sex Ryuzaki" Light told the detective, still giggling profusely.

"I wasn't planning on it…" Ryuzaki said. It's not like I'm going to have another chance to anyway if the next few hours go as planned…

I guess this is one good last note to end on…