(A/N) Well, I'd say I got this one ready in a timely fashion. It's not all torture this time. There's a little H/C. I should mention, though, that I know nothing about coding, so Tadashi's dialogue could have some kinks in it, but I hope you all still find it enjoyable.
Love Don't Die Easy
Chapter 6: Try to Picture Me Without You
"Yes," Callaghan said quietly as he surveyed him up and down. "I'd hoped you wouldn't have to be involved in this, Hiro, but you just couldn't leave well enough alone."
"CALLAGHAN!" Hiro screamed, his struggle against his creations renewed. "He trusted you! I trusted you! Tadashi trusted you…and this is what you do to him?! I'll kill you!"
"I don't doubt that you would. I'd expect nothing less after what I've done, but Hiro, at your age there really are things you just can't understand."
"Understand? The first word I heard out of any of you was understand! If there's something that makes what you've done to Tadashi all right, I don't want to understand!" Hiro snarled.
"All right? No…never all right. Necessary? Absolutely. What I've done is evil; I have no illusions about it, but it had to be done," Callaghan explained as he paced back and forth before him. All the while, Tadashi stood back, just staring vacantly at him.
"Why?" Hiro demanded, angry tears pouring down his face as his gaze darted between Callaghan and Tadashi. "Why did it have to be him? They're my microbots. Why couldn't you have just taken me instead?"
Callaghan shook his head at the question. "Just as a start, you aren't nearly strong enough. I needed your brother's strength and skill for this task. More over, it seemed prudent to keep your mind intact incase there should be…any sort of trouble with the microbots."
"Mind…intact…?" Hiro mumbled in faint shock before the rage took over again, causing him to throw himself even more forcefully against the swarm that held him. He actually managed to get an arm free before they got hold of him again. "HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?!"
"Because it's true. I'm sorry, but it is. You see, Hiro, I've been watching you and Tadashi for years. When I lost Abigail…I knew then that when it came time to seek justice for her, it would be Tomeo Hamada's boys who would help me fight for her."
"T- Tomeo? You…knew my dad?" Hiro heard himself asking. Of all the things he'd been expecting Callaghan to say, that had not been one of them.
"Very well. Who do you think was the terror of SFIT before your brother's crowd came along? Heh, we were such idealists back in the day," the former professor said with a bitter laugh. "Did you know that Silent Sparrow was your father's creation?"
"What are you talking about?" Hiro hissed, glaring at Callaghan through narrowed eyes.
"I mean he came up with the concept. He showed me the plans a long time before anyone at Krei Tech was talking about them. In fact, I'm afraid that may be what got him and Marie killed."
"That…that's ridiculous," Hiro said, shaking his head. "They died in a car crash."
"Yes, and the truck driver who smashed into them was never identified. Even now, he's lying in a morgue somewhere as a John Doe. Someone inside Krei Tech ordered a hit on your father."
"What?"
"I was never able to learn who. Those arrogant bastards were stupid enough to think I wouldn't recognize my own best friend's designs. I was on the verge of a breakthrough…but then they selected Abigail as their test pilot. She didn't know…that they stole Tomeo's design. She was just so excited to be a part of the project…and like an idiot I let her go that day. I suppose some part of me was still an optimist…eager to see Tomeo's tech succeed…but then I lost everything," he said, broad shoulders slumping in misery.
"You don't…blame my dad for that, do you?" Hiro couldn't stop himself asking, wondering if maybe that was why he had chosen Tadashi for this.
"No, no, no, of course not. If Tomeo had been the one to see this project through to completion, I have no doubt Abigail would've been completely safe. Her death is on Krei cutting corners with your father's design. The reason I've been watching the two of you is that I knew Tomeo's sons would help me take down Krei if they knew the truth. I also knew it would be one of you who came up with the tech that could bring him down. After all, with your parents being who they were, how could the two of you not be brilliant," Callaghan said as he moved back toward Tadashi, resting a hand on his shoulder. Still Tadashi didn't react. He just stood, still as a statue, staring silently.
"But…if you thought we'd help you willingly…why did you do this to Tadashi?" Hiro demanded, still struggling against the microbots.
"I didn't tell Tadashi the truth because I didn't want to risk that I might not be able to control his descent into Yokai. The thing about your brother, Hiro, is that he has reserves of untapped anger hidden inside that white knight front he puts on. I first noticed it when he was a child. I knew that if I told him the truth, he would become like me – angry, hell-bent on vengeance. After living with it for so many years, I knew I didn't want that fate for Tomeo's son."
"And this is somehow better?" Hiro shouted. "Twisting him until he isn't even human anymore?"
"Yes, it is better," Callaghan said firmly. "This way, he will not have to suffer what must be done. He can kill and injure without conscience. Whether or not he's aware of it, he's already avenged your parents' deaths, and rather than having to live with the things Yokai has done, when this is all over, the two of us can go to our deaths peacefully," Callaghan explained, his grip on Tadashi visibly tightening.
"What? You mean when you're done with him, you're just going to…throw him away?" Hiro asked, feeling anger and horror roiling in his stomach in equal measure.
"They say that when you go for revenge, you must dig two graves. In this case, it will be three. Tadashi will serve his purpose, then he will sleep. Like Abigail…like Tomeo…like you if you get in our way."
"NO!" Hiro snarled. "I'm not scared of you, Callaghan! You already took my brother from me once. I am not gonna let you do it again! I will save Tadashi, no matter what!"
Again, Callaghan slowly shook his head. Then he moved back toward him, getting right up in his face. "Hiro, Hiro, Hiro…did it not occur to you that it's because of you Tadashi is like this?"
Swallowing painfully, Hiro briefly turned his face away from Callaghan. The former professor had hit on his exact fear, but he knew he couldn't let that deter him now. "It…it did occur to me."
"I did have faith in you, but perhaps you could have gone your whole life without inventing tech I could use. If you hadn't invented these microbots, Tadashi would be perfectly fine right now – nearly finished with his education at SFIT, maybe dating Suri, in talks with some corporation to mass produce a Baymax line…on the way to a very bright future. If not for you, your brother would have been able to live a good life. If you didn't exist…" Callaghan said softly, voice strangely soothing as he lifted the helmet from Hiro's head.
"Stop it," Hiro hissed as tears continued to stream from his eyes. He couldn't bring himself to look at Callaghan.
"Stop what? Telling you things you already know? Because you do know this," Callaghan hissed in his ear. "This – all of this – is because of you."
"Please…just stop," Hiro begged.
"All that guilt, all that hate and rage, and nowhere to turn it but inwards. I wonder, Hiro, are you really any better than I am?"
"I said STOP IT!" Hiro screamed, throwing himself against the microbots one last time before going limp in their grasp.
Callaghan laughed quietly as he took a step back from him. "So weak. Nothing but a child. Yokai, subdue him."
Without even blinking, Tadashi let the microbots fall in a useless mass. Then he sprang forward and delivered another harsh blow to Hiro's damaged ribs. Screaming in agony, the young genius immediately collapsed, unable to move for the pain.
"Now tell him the truth," Callaghan ordered. "Tell him what you are."
"I'm not Tadashi," the mercenary said coldly. "Your brother died ten hours ago. I am the fleeting rage that Tadashi left behind in this world. I am nothing more than a weapon fashioned by Robert Callaghan from his lifeless body."
"No," Hiro sobbed, searching desperately for some sign of his brother in the dead eyes of the man standing over him. "It can't be…I don't believe that."
"You don't? You don't believe he'd cut your throat and leave you bleeding if I ordered him to?" Callaghan asked. At his words, Tadashi drew his katana, laying it threateningly across Hiro's exposed throat. "He will."
"Nii-chan…please," Hiro whispered. "It's me. I'm your brother."
"Not anymore," Callaghan said as he motioned for Tadashi to step back, coming to kneel beside Hiro. "I want you to understand just what it is I've done. I want you to see how meaningless your vow is. This will show you everything you need to see," he said, pressing a flash drive into his unresponsive hand. "I should kill you, but I suppose some part of me still remembers what a good man Tomeo was. He deserves to leave at least one son behind in this world. But this will be the last warning you receive. Stay out of my way. Leave Tadashi to me. If you interfere again, I will have no choice but to order him to put his blade through your heart. Come, Yokai," he ordered as he got to his feet and began to walk out of the alley.
"Tadashi…" Hiro called out faintly. "I'm not…giving up on you."
For a moment, Tadashi looked back at him, expression as stoic as ever. Then he shook his head and flipped the kabuki mask back into place. Callaghan didn't turn back to him when he spoke.
"You should. This time Tadashi Hamada has died, and he will stay dead forever."
Then they were gone – and Hiro was alone. When Wasabi came upon him several minutes later, he was lying where he'd fallen, staring blankly up at the sky as tears continued to trickle down his face.
"My fault…my fault…my fault!"
XxX
After Wasabi had left to go after Hiro and Tadashi, Fred had left to get suited up in case they needed help. That had left GoGo and Honey Lemon to help Suri redress. She was still bleeding pretty badly and the pair had briefly talked about calling 911, but Suri had loudly talked them down, insisting she could take care of her own injuries. They just had to help her back to the med tech building while keeping pressure on the wound.
While GoGo and Honey Lemon worked to calm Cass down, Suri worked on getting herself patched up, steadfastly refusing to think about what had just happened.
The stab wound was easy enough to treat. Nothing vital had been pierced. It was just a matter of cleaning the wound and closing it with skin glue and a bandage. She knew she would have done better to remove her lab coat and cami, but for some reason, she just couldn't stomach the thought of removing her clothes. So she'd done everything with the coat pulled back and the cami rolled up, focusing on the doctoring and not on the memory of the feel of Tadashi's skin against hers…or the way his cold gaze had shot her straight through the heart-
"What did he mean?" she asked herself sharply, forcing herself away from the memory as she paced her work space, even though she knew she should be sitting down. She knew she was experiencing symptoms of shock, but she couldn't let herself think about why that was.
"I want them to see what he's going to do to you…to know that he can do the unthinkable even to someone he once cared for."
"What did you mean?" she demanded, violently thrusting the memory away and picking up one of her rose plants and burying her nose in the petals, breathing in the familiar fragrance. He'd said something about…the robot's secret. Baymax.
"He loved you, too. Did you know that?"
"What did you mean?" she continued to press, beginning to squeeze the peach-colored blossom in a tight fist. He thought she knew something about Baymax, but what? She didn't know a damn thing about coding. That was Tadashi's area. What could she possibly know that could be of any threat to him?
"Tadashi is mine. Any part of him that may have belonged to you is gone. Tell me, Suri…what have you spoken to the darkness? Where have those strong, sure surgeon's hands ventured in their quest to dream of his touch?"
"What did you mean?!" she shouted, feeling a sudden sharp prick in her thumb, which caused her to cry out and drop the plant. The pot shattered on impact with the floor, scattering rose petals and potting soil everywhere. Suri glanced briefly at her hand, seeing the small well of blood where she'd caught herself on a thorn.
"Suri?" a shocked voice whispered, drawing the young surgeon's gaze. Cass was standing in the doorway.
"Cass. I…I…" she mumbled uselessly, searching for an explanation that just wouldn't come.
"Oh…oh, sweetheart," she said softly, moving around the mess on the floor and coming to hug her, pressing her head down against her chest and stroking her hair. That did it. The tears and the horror she'd been holding back began to trickle forward again.
"Why? Why Tadashi?" she cried quietly as Cass held her. "He was so wonderful. I…I loved him!"
"I know, baby. I know," Cass soothed. "He loved you, too…I know he did…so much. I used to catch him staring when you came to the café…or daydreaming when he should have been doing dishes."
Suri laughed quietly through her tears, hugging Tadashi's aunt tighter. "Tadashi…Tadashi…he was such a good person. Why did this have to happen to him?" She still loved him. Of course she did. Nothing Robert Callaghan could do could change that…but that didn't mean that something in her hadn't been broken by what had happened.
"Suri…I'm so sorry," Cass cried with her. "I'm sorry this happened to you. I'd give anything if it would mean we could go back."
"He let me go," she whispered suddenly, looking up at Cass.
"Wh- what?"
"Tadashi isn't the one who did this. It was only for a moment, but he loosened his grip. He let me go. Tadashi's still in there somewhere, Cass. I know he is," she said, drawing herself back into a standing position. Whatever Cass was about to say in response, though, was interrupted.
"Rosie?" a tiny, defeated voice called out. The two women looked to the door to see Hiro standing there, flanked by Fred and Wasabi. Hiro dropped his helmet to the floor before beginning to strip off other pieces of his armor.
"What happened?" Cass demanded as they both raced toward the boys.
"Ta- Tadashi roughed me up a bit. I'm fine," Hiro mumbled. "I can still walk on my own."
"Now I think you know we won't believe that until we get you under an x-ray. What did you-" Suri's rundown was suddenly interrupted when the boy threw his arms around her, clinging to her like she was the last solid thing in the world. Confused, Suri slowly wrapped her own arms around his trembling shoulders. "Hiro?"
"I'm sorry!" Hiro sobbed as he buried his face in her chest. "I'm sorry."
"Hiro, what…what are you talking about?" Suri asked him, doing for him just what Cass had done for her, stroking his hair and rubbing his back. "Why are you sorry?"
"I'm s-sorry for…for what happened to you. Sorry…sorry I was a s-stupid little k-kid…and I didn't know my brother was c-crushing so h-hard. I'm sorry…you t-two never…got to go out on a date. I'm sorry he hurt you," he cried, moving a hand back to touch the bandage on her midsection. "It's my fault. It's my fault," he choked out.
"Oh…oh, Hiro, no. Of course it's not your fault. Tadashi and I…we were both idiots. We could've…any time…and…what happened to me…that's on Callaghan. He used you, no different from the way he's using Tadashi. Do you hear me, Hiro Hamada?" she demanded, lifting his chin up to look him in the eye. "None of this is your fault."
Suri thought she saw a spark of relief in his eyes, but Hiro didn't say anything to acknowledge he'd understood her. Instead he buried his face in her chest again and just cried, and she let him. She held him in her arms and let him cry until he had no more tears left.
XxX
Once Rosie had made certain Hiro hadn't seriously reinjured himself, the others all dispersed to the various hospital cots they'd been sleeping in, anxious to get some kind of rest after the day's harrowing events. Aunt Cass had been sleeping in a chair in his recovery room, and even though he'd tried to argue, she continued to do so. Once he was sure she was asleep, Hiro retrieved the borrowed laptop and Callaghan's flash drive and crept with them back to the robotics building – back to Tadashi's ruined lab.
No one would tell him exactly what had occurred between Tadashi and Rosie in this room, but he had a sinking feeling he knew what it was. It was something Tadashi would never forgive himself for, and there were no doubt many such things by now. Hiro was afraid to dig deeper, but he knew he had to. To turn away from Tadashi's suffering would be an act of betrayal and nothing less.
He hadn't told any of the others about the flash drive. Whatever was contained on it, he knew it was meant for him alone, and he would have to face it alone. So, settling in among the rubble of his brother's life's work, Hiro booted up the laptop, inserted the drive into the port, and accessed the video files contained on it.
The first video showed Tadashi bound to a chair, and Hiro had to watch as Callaghan made his brother live through every moment of his grief for him. When he realized that Tadashi had had to watch him almost commit suicide, he nearly stopped the video. What that must have done to him…
There were images of Tadashi undergoing physical torture – blades, shock treatments, acid, fire, drugs – he was torn apart and put back together over and over again. As horrible as it was to witness, it was nothing compared to what Callaghan did to his mind.
He forced Tadashi to watch clones of his family and friends murdered, images created using the microbots paired with holographic technology. Over and over they died horrifically in front of him – Aunt Cass, GoGo, Wasabi, Honey Lemon, Fred, Rosie, and Hiro himself – and when that had ceased to be effective, Callaghan had repeated the process with Tadashi under the influence of strong hallucinogens, until he could no longer distinguish the lies from reality.
Through drugs and hypnosis, he forced Tadashi to relive the night their parents died, suggesting to his already unhinged mind that maybe there was more he could have done to save them. He induced other delusions – Hiro murdered by Krei Tech, Rosie gunned down by insurrectionists in New Cairo…everything he'd ever loved destroyed, and somehow it always seemed to be his fault.
On and on it went, hour after hour, a macabre slideshow of torture and horror, on and on, until Hiro was a weeping mess on the lab floor, until he knew he would take the sound of Tadashi screaming with him to the grave, and still he forced himself to watch, never looking away from the torment inflicted on his brother because of his invention. Tadashi had received no mercy. Why should he?
Callaghan broke Tadashi down, stripping away the layers of his strength until he was willing to do almost anything to avoid the pain. When the horrifying stream of footage finally came to an end, it was with Tadashi willingly murdering a microbot copy of Hiro…willingly allowing the former professor to erase what remained of his memory in order to escape the horror of it. When Hiro finally ejected the drive from the laptop, it took all of his control not to smash the evil thing against the floor.
The first hints of sunrise were just beginning to glimmer through the shattered window when Hiro slid the laptop and flash drive away from himself, knowing he would destroy them both if he let himself. Curling in on himself, he gripped at his arms until he felt his nails break skin. Once he'd managed to choke down the horror of what he'd seen, he found it was replaced with hatred in his gut, churning until it threatened to overtake him completely. Hate was rebuilding his world – bitter, black, boiling hate pumping from his heart, teaching him how to breathe all over again. Lying curled up on the floor of the ruins of Tadashi's life, there was a moment Hiro really thought he might die with all the hate in his veins.
But no. He couldn't die yet – not while the man who had murdered his brother still breathed. Maybe Callaghan was right. Maybe there was no saving Tadashi from the Hell he'd cast him into, but that didn't mean Hiro wasn't going to sacrifice everything he was trying, and if he failed…if he failed, they would all burn together.
Hiro didn't know how long he lay there making himself bleed, but all the while he whispered to himself. "I'll kill you. I'll kill you. I'll kill you!"
And in the end, he had no idea if he meant Callaghan…or himself.
XxX
After the others had gone to sleep, Suri retreated to her lab once more. Hiro's words about her and Tadashi had made her think…about one last avenue that hadn't been tried, one hope that might still be left.
During her residency training, she and Tadashi had kept in touch via video messages. Phone service and internet hadn't always been the best in some of the areas she'd worked in, so it had just been easier to send pre-recorded videos to each other than to attempt any sort of direct video chatting. It was small talk, little happenings of their day-to-day lives on opposite ends of the globe, but it was the little things that had made her feel closer to him. He'd sent her his last message the morning of the explosion. She hadn't seen the email in her inbox until after she'd heard the news, and by then she just couldn't bear to look at it. She hadn't been able to bring herself to watch Tadashi's last message to her. To know that they would be the last words he would ever speak to her, that she would never see his face or hear his voice ever again…the knowledge was just too painful. So she'd left the email unopened, pending some time in the future when the thought of him didn't feel like a fresh stab to her heart. But that time had never come and now Tadashi had been replaced with Yokai.
However, if Callaghan had been pulling information from Tadashi and he wanted her killed for it, perhaps it meant that there was something about this last message that Tadashi had known…something that might help them restore Baymax. So, shivering with both trepidation and longing, Suri logged into her email and opened the long unread message.
As she'd hoped, the set of files Tadashi had sent her that last morning was much larger than normal. She couldn't pretend to understand any of what she saw, so instead of trying to make sense of it, she went to the one file she did recognize – the video he'd made for her.
When she opened the video file, it was to the sight of Tadashi looking sleep-deprived, but so very excited at the same time.
"Hey, Suri," he greeted, waving at the camera with a goofy grin on his face. "Sorry I haven't messaged you in a few weeks. It's been crazy over here. I've been helping Hiro with his project for the showcase. I don't want to spoil anything here. You're gonna have to wait to see it in person, but I promise you, it's gonna blow your mind. Hiro's really gonna go places with this tech," he said, face glowing with pride for his younger brother. Already, Suri could feel fresh tears pricking at her eyes. Tadashi loved Hiro so much…and Yokai had almost killed him. If those eyes smiling at her from this frozen moment in time had only known what was to come…
"I seriously can't wait for you two to meet. I think you'll get along really well. Hiro's finally met the rest of the gang. They love him, of course. GoGo actually had this awful joke about not knowing him since, y'know, we hardly ever saw him around anymore…always off bot fighting," he said, expression darkening briefly before the smile returned. "Y'know, I still can't believe your reverse psychology idea worked, hooked him right in. Yeah, I know reverse psychology's not the actual term, but have pity on us mortals. I don't talk coding with you, do I?"
Suri laughed quietly as tears trickled down her face. He did sometimes, no different than when she sometimes got a little too in depth with the medical jargon.
"Anyway, the showcase is tonight. I know Hiro's gonna blow everyone else out of the water. Nobody's worried about that…except maybe him, but I just wanted to get these schematics off to you before I'm unavailable for the rest of the day. I updated Baymax's master programming set and I just wanted you to have a look at the groupings, make sure everything's still in order."
Suri couldn't quite help wincing at the memory of the extensive list of files that had been attached to the email. What had Tadashi expected her to do with all that?
"And I can already feel you wincing over there, you big baby. You don't have to worry about the coding. Just edit the subheadings for me and make sure they'll all still function together. I know you can handle that. Baymax is…he's amazing, Suri. I can't wait for you to see him. You and me…we really did something special here. I'm proud of us. We're gonna celebrate the minute you get back here," he said, something in his smile shifting.
"Hey, Tadashi," GoGo called out, suddenly appearing on camera. "You don't have the duct tape do you?"
"As a matter of fact, I do. Left of the window," he said, nodding over his shoulder.
"What are you working on?" she asked as she crossed behind him, though her tone indicated she already knew.
"Just…making a video for Suri," Tadashi answered, awkwardly scratching the back of his head. "And now I don't have time to edit you out. I have to get gone the minute I send this off."
"Oh, good. Won't say anything you'll regret then. Hi, Rosie!" she called before heading out. "Tadashi, man, if you don't tap that, I swear I will."
"GoGo!" Tadashi snarled viciously after his childhood friend, but she'd already disappeared. His face had gone an alarming shade of red when he turned back to the camera. "She…she's joking, of course she's joking. You know GoGo. I think we…all know she prefers blondes anyway. God, I can't believe I said that," he groaned, running a hand through his hair in clear frustration. "But…she's not totally wrong. I know it's still another two weeks before you get back…but there's something I want to talk to you about when you get in. It's just…it's not something I can say in one of these videos. I need to tell you in person. So…two weeks. I can't wait to see you again, Suri. You don't know how much I've missed you. Stay safe. Don't you dare die before I see you again," he finished, pressing a few fingers to the camera before the video stopped, leaving him frozen with that nervous smile on his face.
"Oh…Tadashi," Suri whispered, nearly choking on her tears. Without really thinking, she reached out a hand to press her fingers against his, feeling nothing but the cold glass of the screen beneath them. She could finally see it. In this last video, she could see what she never had before…what he'd meant to say to her. Callaghan hadn't been lying. She'd meant just as much to him as he did to her…and he was going to tell her. "I didn't die. I promised you I wouldn't. Why did you? Tadashi…"
She didn't know how long she sat there crying, loving and despairing, but in the midst of all those tangled emotions there was also a strand of happiness. If she'd understood him correctly, she now had Baymax's primary programming at her fingertips. Callaghan was right to fear. Hiro would be able to use this to get Baymax up and running again.
There might still be hope for Tadashi.
XxX
(A/N) So...who wants to see how Tadashi's taking all this?