Warnings: Swearing, implied male X male relationships, same old same old. Don't like it, don't read it.
Tears may also be shed. (Sorrynotsorry)
Ryuzaki's POV
The storm had finally broken by the time Ryuzaki had stepped through the doors of the towering grey building, the first strand of lightening piercing the sky like shattering glass. Rain had splattered his face as he and Light walked home, but he didn't really mind it much. Light had tried to force him under his umbrella the entire time, but Ryuzaki refused every time. He liked the rain, it was the only element specifically designed to wash away mankind's damage. And he desperately needed to be cleansed…
Light seemed to be rather happier than usual, which made Ryuzaki almost want to regret the turn of events he had set forth. But he had no choice. He knew it had to be done… or else everything he'd worked for would be meaningless… but then again, everything else in his life had already turned out that way, why not add one more thing to the list? Memories kept him awake at night constantly; his back was practically hunched with the weight of the knowledge of all the lives that had been lost because of him. One in particular haunting him more and more as the hours grew shorter. He knew his eyes had dulled from their once brilliant radiance to a blank coal grey, the only thing they could really see was his work, nothing more. Until now, he had nothing left in his life to lose. He'd lost his mother, his father, his life, even his brother… and now…
The one person who understood him couldn't even help him anymore. Watari had been good to him all these years, but he could never truly understand the pain Ryuzaki felt at nearly every waking moment. This is why he distracted himself with solving crimes. Because maybe… if he could help with someone else's pain… his own sins might be atoned. If there was an afterlife, which Ryuzaki didn't think was even remotely possible, would he be thanked for what he had done? Or would his past overwrite that all… would he go to heaven, or hell? Or was he right in just thinking there was absolutely nothing left once you died… He didn't even know which would be worse anymore…
Oh B… why did you have to let me take this all by myself. You were brilliant… why did you think it necessary to go to that length to prove yourself…? Why did you have to care for A so much…
Ryuzaki suppressed a sigh as he thought of his brother. Having to hunt him down and catch him had been one of the hardest things he'd ever had to do. But if anyone else had done it, B would be dead by now. Sure B had killed people… a lot of people…in not very kind ways… and may have been technically insane… but Ryuzaki couldn't let B be put to the death penalty. Not when it was his fault that B was this way. Besides, he was the last person left alive Ryuzaki had cared for other that Watari…
Ryuzaki couldn't help thinking back on the time he had spent with his brother in Wammy's. He knew exactly what had broken B… and L still blamed himself entirely for that. Actually, blamed was too weak a word to describe it. L was solely and irrevocably responsible for A's death, he may as well have been holding the razor himself. It was personally his fault A was dead, and that had sent B over the edge.
B… I never thought I'd miss you this much… Maybe you were right. Knowing the numbers is too much to take in, especially now I've found my A…
Ryuzaki glanced at the man beside him, shaking off the rain from his umbrella beside him, completely oblivious to the turmoil erupting inside Ryuzaki's mind once again. His normally well groomed hair had gone slightly scruffy during their wild encounter in the park, sticking up at odd angles as he shook himself out in a cute way that made L's chest flutter. His; for the moment anyway, chocolaty brown eyes were still slightly dilated from their activities earlier as he stared up at the building ahead of them, a small smile shaping his perfect lips. His strong hands were hanging loosely at his sides, except the hand the umbrella hung from of course. L could see every single muscle moving in harmony, creating such a perfect bronze physique that even the straightest man on earth would have to admire his beauty. Everything about him spoke perfection…so why must he be who Ryuzaki knew the innocent looking boy was… why? Of all people, why him? It just wasn't fair…
Why was it the moment Ryuzaki found something worth fighting for… he has to let it go…?
…
Ryuzaki had finished the puzzle again for the seventh time that day, the pieces almost completely burned into his memory even though they held no discernable pattern. A few of the other boys had been watching him with a mild interest as his fingers pressed in the pieces quicker than they claimed was humanly possible. But that was because they weren't as smart as he was, he knew exactly where they needed to fit without even having to stop to look at them properly. The other children had all left him be after the third completion of the puzzle though, leaving L to his work. Without even pausing, Ryuzaki flipped the board on its side, letting the pieces fall back to the ground in a random jumbled pile. Puzzles were a good distractions to everything happening around him. It gave him something to do that didn't seem pointless. But still, he wanted to do something else now, he was bored of the plain white pieces he knew off by heart. Perhaps the Lego to the right of him would stretch his mind a bit…certainly his imagination…
L's brother was talking to A again over the top of the book he was reading. It was funny really, watching his own brother having to study to be just as smart as Ryuzaki was. The same with A, even though A was older than Ryuzaki. Ryuzaki never really noticed their activities unless they were physically beside him, he was usually too busy solving puzzles and helping Mr Wammy to notice. Not just puzzles with touchable pieces either, these were puzzles even the police couldn't solve. Like when people had disappeared, those were L's favourite types of puzzles. It stretched his brain finding all the pieces, connecting one thing to another, until the big picture was sitting right before his eyes. He especially liked it when he found the person missing still alive, it made him feel happy to have helped a person in some small way, even if they would never know it was his doing. Ryuzaki almost couldn't count how many of these sorts of cases he'd solved since he'd come here eight years ago…
Ryuzaki spent a moment watching his brother and A converse as he stacked the Lego in his fingertips into a straight line. B was slouching against the arm of the couch, casually throwing his legs over A's in an intimate yet careless way. He had a small smile on his face as he spoke to A about something one of the other boy's had said in class, not paying any attention to the book clenched in his hand in a similar way L would hold things. His dark hair was shiny for once, rather the messy locks that Ryuzaki was used to since he stopped caring for himself. His ruby tinted eyes sparkled as he stared at A, a look he only ever got around his partner, but today it seemed even brighter than usual. Even the dark circles under his eyes seemed to be less prominent today against his pale skin, not quite as pale as Ryuzaki's, but still fairly light. Even the way he was moving was relaxed and peaceful for once. He seemed happy at last…Ryuzaki was glad about that, usually B was rather…melancholy…
But, on the other hand…A looked…wrong. A's gaze was slightly unfocused, barely an emotion in their usually bright, glacial blue depths. His normally thought out messy blonde hair was slightly knotted, something he'd never usually allow to happen, and where usually it would hang in little spikes around his warm face it just drooped limp and lifeless. His usually olive coloured skin seemed much paler than usual, and he even seemed to be wearing a second long sleeved shirt which confused L, seeing as it was nowhere near cold. He only seldom acknowledged what B was saying, occasionally laughing at the right moments in a way Ryuzaki could tell was painfully fake, an act for B's sake… but why? Usually it was A getting B to not behave like this… something was up with him… he wasn't even studying, that was the one thing A did obsessively…but even he was just staring blankly at the same page… something was wrong with him…
"…Just do it already…It has to be…Alright then B, I'll see you later then... I'm… going to go to the library for a little while" A stood, letting his shaggy blonde hair fall across his icy blue eyes. He looked distracted, as if his mind were somewhere else entirely. He's lying, Ryuzaki realised… But why would he be lying to my brother? I thought they had a thing…
"…O-Ok…I will see you later though…promise?" B looked up at with a small frown. He could see the lie too. There was something in his brother's eyes too, something Ryuzaki couldn't quite decipher annoyingly enough, but the way B was staring at A so intently… heck, if only he could think of a word to fit the look. He did notice B's eyes trailing to a spot just above A's head, staring intently with his face furrowed.
"Promise? Uh, yeah, of course! Catch ya" A waved a hand over his shoulder in a lazy flick as he left the room, leaving L and B alone to stare after his thin yet muscular form. B sighed deeply as the door closed behind A with a frown.
"They've started shifting again…" B muttered darkly. Ryuzaki looked over the top of his pile of Lego he had begun to build into letters absentmindedly to see his brother looking rather miserably at the door…
"What was that?" He asked his twin.
"It's Aar- I mean, A's numbers… I'm starting to get worried about him…" B said anxiously.
"What about his numbers?" Ryuzaki asked again, attention beginning to slip back to the blue L he was making from the Lego. L had heard B talk about those numbers he sees before. No one else believed him about seeing them but L. He had no reason to believe his brother was lying about them, and he had seen the consequences of people ignoring the numbers first hand…besides, he was very much used to it now. B had been able to see the numbers for as long as he could remember, so L didn't find it odd at all. He'd grown up with it.
"They've started to change again…and I think I keep seeing flashes of what'll happen…but I don't know how to change them!" B put his head in his hands, voice breaking slightly. L didn't stop putting his building fingers all together, but he did look back up at his brother with sympathy. He knew he and A were close, very close for someone their ages. Both Ryuzaki and B were only fifteen, but only for a few more days, and A was already sixteen turning seventeen, but they were closer than any of the older kids. L had sometimes heard them from his room making weird noises… he wasn't sure what exactly they were doing, but it was loud.
"Flashes? You can see flashes of what will happen to him?" Ryuzaki asked, intrigued.
"Yes…and it's horrible… I can only see flashes of people I'm close with, like you… and mum and dad…" B said slowly. He sighed, eyes clouding dangerously darker as memories swarmed his mind like an inescapable cloud of poison.
"I knew he'd kill her, and I knew she wouldn't listen to me. I told her what Dad was going to do in the bell tower… I saw it in quick glimpses before it happened. I saw him wrapping the rope around her neck, the bell's echoing booming noise as her body made them toll…but would she listen!? NO ONE EVER LISTENES!" B snarled angrily, red eyes flashing darkly. L looked up with a start. B wasn't usually this angry…
"That's why I pushed him. I wanted to stop him… but I knocked her over too… once the numbers are set, there's nothing you can do to change them… at least your numbers aren't so horrific. You're lucky L…" B's face eased back out of its rage into one of absolute depression.
"Me? I thought you said you'd never talk about my numbers, and now you're saying you can see what'll happen to me?" L blinked in surprise. He'd never seen his brother like this before… he didn't like that dark look in his unusual coloured eyes…
"Yeah, but yours won't happen for a long while yet. A's though… it's too soon Lawliet! I don't know if I can deal with this again… knowing exactly when and where it'll happen, and knowing there's nothing you can do to change it… no wonder the teacher wants to check if I'm alright in the head" B flopped back against the couch beside L, a hand laid over his ruby shaded eyes.
"Don't call me by my real name…can you tell me what will happen to him? Maybe I can help" L turned away from his Lego A, B and L and turned fully to face his brother, wanting to know if this was another problem he could fix. B laughed cruelly.
"Hahahah, there's nothing you can do to fix this, L. In fact, in a way, you're kind of to blame! A thinks he can never amount to anything in life or come close to even being considered as the next L. You have no idea how much pressure both him and I are under as the 'back ups'…" B practically spat the words 'Back ups' as if they were venom upon his tongue.
"That's why we're A and B you know, we're the Alternative and the Back Up for you, L… I think…no, I know how he'll die… I can see the blood… the razor… a bottle of pills…or sometimes it's a rope around his throat…or sometimes just pictures of him standing at the top of the bell tower…" B's eyes had clouded over again with that black cloud.
"He can't take the pressure much longer. I can usually see two sets of dates for him, but now there's just a mish mash of constantly changing numbers. He's thinking about doing something terrible… and I don't know if I can be there in time to stop him…" B shuddered violently as he imagined it. Ryuzaki wasn't sure how to comfort his brother, he wasn't good with dealing with other people's emotions… especially when his brother's were so erratic.
"Well…if you keep checking to see when the numbers go definite, try and stop him. You're the only person who can see all these numbers after all, stop him" L said, as if it were completely simple.
"Heh, did you think I wouldn't do that?" B laughed hollowly. "I literally have a picture of him I constantly check…Your numbers are so simple, why can't A's be either…"
Ryuzaki tilted his head to one side, actually putting his Lego structures out of his mind to look at his brother properly. He'd always wanted to know his numbers, but B had refused to tell him. Maybe…
"If my numbers are so simple, let me know what they are. I want to see them" L told his brother.
"…I'm not sure that's best… knowing when you're going to die isn't exactly something pleasant…why do you think I hate mirrors so much?" B looked him dead in the eye, showing Ryuzaki just how serious he was.
"Everyone has to die someday, wouldn't it be better to know rather than to be left in the dark about it? If there's something you can do to make it easier for the others around you, shouldn't people deserve to know? So they can prepare for it without the constant darkness of doubt and uncertainty? I know I can cope with it B. Please tell me"
…
I was so wrong…
"Hey Light, I'll catch up with you in a minute alright? There's something important I must attend to" L said blankly, not looking Light in the eye.
"Oh, sure, not a problem. I'll go dry up then. Call me if you need me" Light said, giving Ryuzaki a friendly grin. Ryuzaki's heart felt like it had been grabbed and ripped from his chest. Why must Light make things so difficult? Ryuzaki wished there was some way around all this, but it had to be done…
Ryuzaki glanced up at the clock on the wall. 7:51 PM… Ryuzaki sighed and trudged his sodden feet up the stairs. He felt as if he were being crushed by Light…No…he was being crushed by Kira. He had to write it all down, so Matsuda can see for himself… Ryuzaki was still rather annoyed the detective had been so adamant to deny what Ryuzaki was saying…but he couldn't ignore hard evidence…
Ryuzaki pressed his fingertips against the door, hearing it blip in reply and opening under his touch. He shuffled into the bathroom and threw one of his fluffy white towels over his head to try and soak up some of the water that was dripping everywhere once again. He only had about an hour before Watari called the country that had agreed to help them…sort of. The video had to only about twenty minutes long in total, maybe less. He had enough time…
L squatted on his bed, not caring if he messed it up in the slightest, and pulled his laptop over. He took a strawberry from the bowl on his bedside table Watari must have put there for him and began to nibble it as he clicked open the files Matt had sent him the day before. The sweet taste that exploded on his tongue wasn't nearly enough to take away the sourness in Ryuzaki's mind, but maybe seeing his successors again might…
…
"Matt, why are you filming again?" The voice of Near sounded somewhere beside the camera.
"Shh! Just listen!" Matt hissed. The shot seemed to be of a bedroom door, and judging by the way Matt opened it without a single problem, it was his own.
"To what?" Near asked quietly.
"Can't you hear him? It's Mel!" Matt snickered. Now the camera seemed to be picking up the noise Matt was talking about. Ryuzaki could hear a shower going, and over the top of that, someone singing loudly.
"…Brought me down, upon my knee's"
"Oh I beg, I beg and plead"
"Singing"
"Youu-uuuu-u-uu a-aaare"
"Youu-uuuu-u-uu a-aaare"
Matt had begun to snicker uncontrollably as he slipped into the bedroom. Matt and Mello must have shared a room, one side was covered in gaming posters and toys, and pictures of cars, the other side was dominated with posters for bands and mounds of chocolate. Mello's bed was the top bunk; neatly made and cared for, save for the chocolate wrappers, whereas Matt's bottom bunk looked as if a bomb had gone off. A small orange plushie sat on his pillow, the only thing neat in the entire mess of a bed. On the left side of the room was a glossy wooden door, the singing obviously coming from in there. Matt pointed the camera at Near's blank yet slightly curious face and giggled.
"Wait here and run when I tell you to…" Matt said with a smirk. Near nodded and began to twirl a strand of his silvery hair around his finger.
Matt laid his hand over the doorknob and gave it an experimental twist. No lock… Matt laughed softly and pushed the door open slightly.
"And noooothing else compaaaares
Oh and nooothing else compaaaaares"
Matt snickered once more as he pushed silently through the doorway. You couldn't see anything of Mello other than a streak of blonde hair through the vapour on the glass. He mustn't have heard Matt come in, as his singing picked up in volume dramatically.
"Home, Ho-oooome
Where I wanted to go
Home, Ho-oooome
Where I wanted to go
"Oh, be still my aching heart Mello! You sound like an angel!" Matt pretended to swoon. Mello yelped shrilly, a loud bang sounding from the shower as something must have dropped from his hands.
"MATT?! WHAT THE FUCK- GET OUT!" Mello shrieked, his voice breaking badly.
"But what else am I going to film for the rest of the day?" Matt began to laugh uncontrollably.
"You WHAT!? Have you got that damn camera- I AM GOING TO FREAKING KILL YOU YOU RED HEADED BASTERED!"
"Near, run!"
…
Ryuzaki couldn't help but smile. How innocent they all were…
…
"Oh this is going to be so fucking great…!" Matt snickered as he placed the camera down on the desk facing the doorway. His goggles were slightly askew on his forehead as he made sure the camera wouldn't fall over, then quickly rushed from the room.
"MEL! COME HERE A SEC, MEL!" Matt's voice called from the doorway. The second he had spoken, Matt dashed off down the hallway, leaving the camera filming the empty room for a few empty seconds.
"What? ...Matt what do you want? Matt!" Mello's voice came echoing around the corridor, footsteps knocking on the wooden floors as he drew closer to the room.
Ryuzaki couldn't help but notice the dark shape on the roof, and it pricked his curiosity immensely as Mello entered the room without noticing it straight away.
"Matt seriously what…. Uhg, he's not even here is he… what the hell…" Mello rolled his eyes and went over to the shelf.
"Whatever, I needed another…what the- where the hell did they-!" Mello spun around wildly, eyes wide with confusion.
"They were here this morning! I couldn't have eaten them that fast, where the fuck did they…Oh what the hell?!" Mello had finally noticed the dark lump on the roof. It was a whole bunch of chocolate bars taped to the ceiling.
"What the fuck, is that my… MATT! YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Mello shrieked as he figured it out.
Mello stared angrily around the room, trying to find the red haired boy and make him take them down, but upon seeing no one, kicked the chair furiously with a high pitched cry. He clambered up on top of the bunk beds, to try and see if he could reach them to pull them down.
He couldn't.
"I swear to god, when I find you Matt I will pull your damn hair out by the roots… how did you even get them up there!? MATT!" Mello yelled furiously, still swiping pointlessly from the bed top.
…
Ryuzaki actually found himself grinning stupidly as he watched the blonde try and throw something at the roof to dislodge his precious chocolate, to no avail. The boy had such a temper on him…
…
Mello had stamped heatedly from the room and returned a few second's later, broom in hand. He began to violently hit the taped goods on the roof, leaving a small dent in the ceiling as he stabbed it at the sticky tape angrily.
"I am going to stick this pole so far up your ass when I catch you Matt!" Mello growled as he managed to prise off a little bit of the tape. "Then, I'm going to fucking tape you to the roof!"
With one final swing of the broom, the ball of chocolate was half pulled, half smashed from the roof, leaving a big swipe mark against the ceiling. The chocolate landed right beside the camera with a large thud.
"Finally! Uhg I will MURDER you Matt when I catch you… Oh you little shit!" Mello snarled as he found the camera. He picked it up and flung it against the bunk beds haughtily. With a crackling thud, the camera bounced off the wall and landed on the pillow beside Matt's orange plush dinosaur with a flame on its tail. Mello glared at it hatefully a few seconds… then laughed cruelly.
"Heheh, you're going to regret this Matt!" Mello smiled with a sadistic glee as he grabbed the camera and the toy. "Now, where's that tape?"
The camera cut to black for a few seconds, before returning to Mello pointing it at the front doors of Wammy's.
"Any second now… this is what you get for messing with my shit Matt" Mello laughed evilly.
All you could see of Mello was his leg swinging lazily as he stretched back on the tree branch he was perched on. His loose fitting black trousers were almost getting caught on a broken branch, but either Mello didn't notice it or just didn't care.
Near was laying just at the base of the solid stone steps leading out the front door, playing with some sort of robot toy with his usual disinterested expression. It must have had some sort of wings the camera couldn't quite catch, because Near was making it swoop just above him in soaring arcs. Mello sighed and sat up.
"What's taking him so damn long… he should have noticed by now! He loves that damn thing" Mello grumbled, zooming in slightly on the front door. It remained empty.
Near jumped with a start and looked up at the doorway as a voice boomed through the front doors.
"MELLO YOU ASSHOLE!"
"There we go! Took him long enough" Mello laughed as Matt came stomping furiously out the front door.
"WHERE ARE YOU YOU SON OF A BITCH! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH CHARMANDER!" Matt shrieked, almost as angry as Mello had been before. Near shrank back slightly as Matt came storming up to him.
"Where the hell is he Near? I know he's out here somewhere!" Matt demanded, orange goggles flashing with rage. Near calmly sat up and waited a second before answering.
"He told me not to tell you that" Near replied evenly.
"I don't care what he told you, answer the damn question!" Matt snarled angrily. Near blinked in surprise at Matt's harsh tone. Usually he was nice to Near, even when Mello was being an ass to him.
"…Well, he did tell me to tell you something" Near said coolly. Mello snickered softly.
"And what's that then?" Matt glared.
"Look to God, your answer lies with the heavens" Near replied, attention returning to his robot.
"Look to…oh god he didn't!" Matt gasped and rushed out onto the grassy lawn. He turned and looked up at the top of the building with horror.
"MELLO!" Matt cried out with shock and outrage, staggering as he nearly fell to the ground with anger as he looked up at the roof. Mello began to cackle evilly and zoomed in on the top of the building.
Sitting, on top of the towering cross that loomed over the grounds of Wammy's, was a little orange toy. Taped to the centre of the cross, as if it had been crucified, little stuffed flame wiggling in the wind.
"How did you even- MELLO!" Matt shrieked.
"That's what you get you stripy basted! No one messes with my chocolate!" Mello called from the tree, still laughing uncontrollably at the look on Matt's face.
Matt spun around in the blink of an eye with a look of pure hatred plastered on his face. He found Mello after a few seconds and began to sprint dead on at him.
"I WILL KILL YOU YOU BLONDE BITCH!" Matt snarled.
"Oh shit!" Mello laughed and jumped from the tree, camera jostling violently as he began to bolt away from the angry red head.
"GET BACK HERE MELLO!"
The screen cut to black
…
Ryuzaki had found himself chuckling softly at his successors. It was rather impressive Mello had even managed to climb up to the roof, let along managing to scale the golden cross and taping the pokemon doll to its centre. It had taken months for L, B and A to learn how to scale the building without slipping, as B had done on at least three occasions. Mello was rather resourceful…
…
"Ok, I wasn't going to film again today. Not after the bruises I got from last time… But this is just too freaking cool to not show" Matt's voice said quietly. He was walking down the corridor Ryuzaki knew well. The door to Matt's right was slightly ajar, a bit of light peeking through the crack. Matt carefully, and quietly, pushed it open just enough to peer through.
Near had built and entire city out of Lego. London from the looks of it. Out of yellow bricks stood the houses of parliament, complete with Big Ben, that stood just over the head of the boy standing beside it, carefully placing blocks into a group of buildings beside it. He had made nearly half of Westminster Abby, seeming to have lost attention about three quarters of the way through to work on his current buildings. There was a large Buckingham Palace made out of white bricks, complete with toy tree's he had placed in the palace gardens, roads with actual Lego double decker buses, a black bricked Piccadilly circus, a beautifully built Trafalgar square, and to Ryuzaki's absolute astonishment, a scale lego model of the London Eye. It was a complete work of art, and Ryuzaki couldn't believe Near was only thirteen to make something this large.
"How…just how?" Matt murmured as he zoomed in on the enormous Ferris wheel as it stood just over the fake river from where Near was standing beside.
Near was staring thoughtfully at the now finished grey building he had been constructing, half-mindedly sucking on a bright purple brick as he twirled a strand of hair around his index finger. He glanced at his surrounding landscape, which took up the entire room from end to end, with a thoughtful frown.
"Hmm… out of brown blocks… the roof will have to be made of blue…" Near frowned as he gazed at the half finished Westminster Abby.
"Nhg…blue…Westminster isn't blue… maybe if I took…?" Near looked over at another brown building about three meters to his left.
"…But then that'll be…hrrrn" Near growled in frustration.
The door to the left of the camera twitched slightly, and a flash of yellow poked into the doorway. It was Mello. Ryuzaki note with surprise the bruise blossoming from under his left eye, making a black mark like spilled ink against his fair complexion. Ryuzaki guessed Matt must have caught up to Mello at the end of the last recording…Mello's bright blue eyes flashed around the room, first in astonishment, then in uncontrollable jealously and hatred. He disappeared for a split second, then reappeared with a broomstick.
"Oh Mello don't…" Matt groaned as Mello grinned hatefully at the carefully crafted London Eye. Mello reached the stick out from the doorway and harshly prodded the base of the structure, sending it toppling over onto the boat made of Lego sitting in the fake river. With a crash, the Ferris wheel shattered. Mello darted away just as Near spun around to see his masterpiece broken on the floor.
Near frowned at it for a few long seconds before looking up at he slightly open doorway Mello had disappeared from. Near let out a sharp sigh of irritation, and sat on the floor to rebuild his work.
"For fuck sake Mel…" Matt sighed, before shutting the camera off.
…
Ryuzaki shook his head at the blonde. He really must learn how to gain better control over his emotions is he truly wanted to follow in L's footsteps… But Near… Ryuzaki hadn't known his successor was that talented. Ryuzaki had made quite a few models in his lifetime, and not just with simple Lego, but even he was impressed by the thirteen year old… even with his mental disadvantages. He seemed to cope well with his condition though, so Ryuzaki never worried too much about the boy.
The screen changed one last time, Matt's voice breaking the black silence with his cheerful tone.
"Hey, L, hurry up and catch Kira would ya?" Matt's goggled face appeared on screen, sitting cross-legged on his bed. He had a loose fitting black and white striped long sleeve shirt on and a pair of black jean, his orange goggles sitting neatly over his emerald eyes, blocking them from view. His red hair was slightly ruffled, as if he'd been playing with it for quite some time before recording himself. Matt also had a small bruise on his cheek and shoulder in the shape of a fist. No need to guess where that came from…His Charmander was sitting safely beside him, but somewhat dusty from being taped to the roof of the building. Ryuzaki didn't even know how he'd managed to get it down without hurting himself…
"Before Mello and Near kill each other…well…before Mello kills Near and gets buried alive under one of his piles of toys… seriously, If you don't hurry up, all the criminals'll be gone before either of them can be real detectives. And I'd never hear the end of it from Mel if that happens…" Matt laughed to himself. He ran a nervous hand through his deep red hair, as if feeling shy talking to a camera.
"He's not as bad as he seems you know. Just a little bad tempered… he's really trying hard to be smart, but Near gets on his nerves a lot. Not intentionally of course, it's just that… Mello doesn't like being second best… in anything. Don't judge him too harshly because of that, he really is trying his best" Matt seemed to be blushing slightly as he defended his best friend. He gave a little shy laugh and scratched his wrist, cheeks flushing slightly…Ryuzaki could tell there was something between Matt and Mello, even if Matt appeared to be trying to hide it. Ryuzaki had gotten good at seeing hidden feelings like that…
"Well… yeah… I'm not too sure why I'm making all this. Roger got me a camera for my birthday and… I don't know. I just like hacking into your computer to be honest. May as well do something in there instead of just being weird and stuff… shit, now I forgot what I was going to say" Matt laughed.
"Whatever, I don't think it was that important. Seriously though, hurry up and get Kira. You're getting slow in your old age! Anyway, I'm not sure what else to say so…yeah. Bye I guess" Matt said awkwardly, reaching across the bed and switching the camera off.
Again with the old… he was only 25 and they were already calling him old.
Ryuzaki was glad Matt had done this, it was exactly what he needed to see today. It had made him happy, seeing his two successors and his talented hacker just being themselves, not just stiff nervous voices and images over a computer as he spoke to them. This was them, how they really were…
Ryuzaki glanced at his computer clock, to see how much time he had left before Watari would call the others… 8:22… he still had time. He hadn't been planning to do this initially, but Matsuda's all out denial had forced his hand. He opened up a new document and began to quickly type out exactly what the detective needed to know… you know…now that he thought of it…Matsuda wasn't the only one who needed information…yes, this is perfect. The other two will need to know as well, and Ryuzaki only has one way to bridge the pair… It's the only way. His little hacker was the best shot he had to get the pair together…
Light's POV
Ryuzaki had been acting… strange ever since they'd left the park. Light had though he would be a little bit happier after that had just… been intimate together. But something had been bothering the odd man ever since then…
Why should you care, it's L. He always looks like that!
"Not recently… besides, he looks even more…distant than ever" Light spoke softly to himself.
Well, I don't know what to tell you. Mainly because I don't care, but I honestly don't know anything more than you do. Besides, you're the one who's good at emotions. I'm the one who blocks out emotions remember?
"Of course I do! How can I forget with you talking to me about it all the time! I just though… Never mind. We need to figure out this whole Rem thing anyhow"
What's there to figure out?! You already fucked it up by telling her to wait! We should have just killed him days ago, when you were sane…when we were both sane…
"No, I shouldn't of! Besides, isn't having L on our side just as good as him being out of the way?"
He's not on our side, he still wants to kill us. He practically told us that at the park! What are you, a goldfish? He wants me dead, and if you're in the way, he'll kill you too!
Light staggered as he paced slightly, hit by Kira's words snarled at him. There was too much truth to his words to bare…
You need a wake up call Light. He may say he loves you, but he'll forget all about that when he finds out about me.
"No he wouldn't… would he?"
Light… love and hate are only a word apart. And the word Kira, will shatter that like a hammer to a mirror.
Light bit his lip hard. Ryuzaki couldn't be that determined to kill Kira, that he'd remove Light from the picture to capture him… could he? Kira had to be wrong about this. There had to be a way around this… somehow…
He had to keep L alive… Light would do anything to make that so… but would Kira let him?
Ryuzaki's POV
"Ryuzaki, it's time. I'm going to call in the others now" Watari's voice sounded through the mobile Ryuzaki pinched with his thumb and index finger.
"I understand. I'll be right down. I've finished up here anyway… thank you, Watari" Ryuzaki's voice was barely more than a whisper.
"Not at all Ryuzaki" Watari's warm voice said reassuringly. This made Ryuzaki hurt worse though…
Ryuzaki flipped the phone shut and pocketed the thumb drive from his computer. 9:08… just 13 more minutes…
He took a last bite of the fourteenth strawberry he's consumed to wash it down… but it didn't really help… He had to go find Light…
Bong…
He found Light downstairs lounging on the staircase, almost as if he'd been waiting for Ryuzaki. His face was drawn into a frown, and Ryuzaki watched silently as his theory became fact once again. Matsuda will have to see for himself though…
"…Light?" Ryuzaki spoke at last. Light jumped, brown eyes darting up the staircase to the slouching figure.
"Oh, there you are Ryuzaki!" Light looked almost relived to see him. A small boom of thunder sounded through the building as the storm raged on.
"Geez…if this keeps up, we could lose the power" Light glanced towards the window around the corner as rain and wind howled against the glass.
"There's a back up generator in here, not very powerful but it's enough" Ryuzaki shrugged. "I was actually hoping to find you Light"
"Really?" Light blinked. Ryuzaki nodded shortly.
"Yes, I wanted to be the one to show you this" Ryuzaki said.
"Show me what?" Light asked. Ryuzaki hesitated before answering.
"…You'll see"
"Ryuzaki, are you alright? You look kinda pale. You're not catching a cold from all that rain are you?" The concern in Light's voice was almost painful to hear. No way Ryuzaki would tell the truth on this one.
"I'm fine. Really. Just still a little wet that's all…" Ryuzaki scratched his still slightly damp head.
"Come on, let's go Light… It seems like it's all worked out"
Bong…Bong…
Ryuzaki still couldn't wash that bitter taste from his mouth. He ran his tongue across the roof of his mouth in an attempt to get rid of the horrible taste, but it was useless. As long as it did its job, it didn't really matter how bad it tasted. He led Light through the doors of the main room to see all the other members of the task force standing before the computer in shock.
"Ryuzaki! What's the meaning of all this!?" Matsuda cried in disbelief. Ryuzaki pretty much ignored his words. He discreetly slipped the USB into Matsuda's pocket without anyone noticing, including Matsuda himself, and seated himself in his chair. "You've somehow gotten approval from another country to use the note book for an execution?"
"Watari. Excellent work, thank you" Ryuzaki told the computer before him, imprinted with the big Old English styled W.
"Not at all" Watari replied.
"First things first. Please make arrangements to transport the notebook immediately" Ryuzaki said, staring at the notebook before him stonily. That torn corner was already annoying him…
"Right"
"Ryuzaki what are you trying to do?" Light asked, almost suspiciously. Ryuzaki's fingers found the silver spoon on the plate beside him and tapped the surface of the notebook with it absentmindedly.
Bong…Bong…
"I'm going to try out the notebook for real"
The taskforce all made horrified gasps, as Ryuzaki had expected…
Bong…Bong…Bong…
"We can't do that! And there's no point testing it out when we already know the note book's power is real!" Aizawa said angrily.
"A-and besides, who's going to write the name?" Matsuda asked warily. "If someone starts writing in the notebook they'll have to obey the thirteen day rule and keep writing names forever"
"It's already been worked out. The person who'll write in the notebook is a criminal scheduled to be executed in just over thirteen days. If he's still alive thirteen days after writing the name he'll be pardoned from execution" Ryuzaki told the room. Matsuda made a startled gasp. Ryuzaki just wanted to roll his eyes… can't they see? This is it… this is how everything will be solved once and for all, and their treating it like a poisonous snake… and they don't even know the half of it.
"But still. To sacrifice a life-" "WE ARE VERY CLOSE" Ryuzaki cut Soichiro Yagami off before he could finish his sentence, irritation overwhelming him.
"If we work this out, the entire case will be solved!" Ryuzaki didn't dare look anywhere but the computer, feeling the gaze of Light Yagami burning into the back of his skull. Or was it Kira's gaze today?
What's the difference anymore?
Bong…Bong…Bong…
There was a crash of lightening as a bolt of electricity must have hit the building. The room was engulfed in blackness as an alarm began to shriek. The red light of the backup generators kicked in at once, filling the room with it's eerie, dark glow. The computer monitors flickered back into life, throwing out a soft white light across Ryuzaki's face…
"What is this, a black out!" Matsuda gasped. The red light…a group of people around him…the soft glow of monitors… word for word B…
And so it begins…
Bong. Bong. Bong.
…
B looked uneasy at his brother, reluctant to voice out the invisible numbers that predicted his date of death.
"Are you sure…? Knowing when you'll die is not a thing I would wish on anyone…" B asked slowly.
"I have never been more serious" Ryuzaki told him. B looked like he was about to protest again… but sighed. He looked at his brother, the very last of his family left alive, and tilted his head to one side.
"Fine…I'll tell you, but you're not going to thank me for this" B said sullenly. His eyes drifted to a spot just above Ryuzaki's head, staring at the invisible numbers that must have floated there. It seemed to almost pain him to read them aloud.
"…Lawliet Ryuzaki… you have three sets of numbers, but one is so slight it almost certainly wouldn't be the real one" B told him slowly
"You will die on… either the 5th of November 2009, the 8th of November the same year…or you'll live to the 9th of September 2035… but the chances of that are so slim there not even worth mentioning… You'll almost definitely die on either the 5th or the 8th of November at 9:21 PM on both occasions…"
"Each vision I see of you is the same. I can see computers, a red glowing light, some sort of computer throwing light onto you, and a group of people standing around you. I can hear bells… the same ones as mums… and… I can feel your heart just…stopping. Just like that. But I do know it's not going to hurt much...you've swallowed something to make sure it didn't hurt...When you hear the bells…it'll be time…"
B frowned to himself, staring at his hands.
I'll die on either the 5th or the 8th of November 2009…? That's only ten more years…
"See…told you you wouldn't like it… but still, much better than A's though…I mean…it's awful…see?" B rummaged in his pockets and pulled out a slightly dog eared photo folded neatly into two. He opened it up to a picture of both A and B out the front of Wammy's, A's arm around B's waist and smiling warmly while B shyly snuggled into A's neck. B had never let Ryuzaki see this before…
"See, there I am with my date, the same exact date as always…and there's A with…wait…what? No… NO! AARON!" B screamed with horror as he leapt from the couch, practically tripping over Ryuzaki in his desperate struggle. Ryuzaki blinked with a start as his brother shoved him aside to race for the door.
"AARON!"
Ryuzaki watched blankly as his twin threw the door open and ran screaming down the hall, tears in his eyes. So…this mean's A must be dead… L didn't understand the emotions coming from his brother entirely, but he didn't like seeing him this distressed… L listened to his brother's shrieks carry down the hallway as he raced for his and A's shared room with a dull expression. He had an idea of what B would find at the end of the hall…
L turned back to his lego structures, a big blue letter L, a red letter B, and a warm, sunny, delicate yellow A… L barely reacted when he heard his brother's desperate calls suddenly cut themselves off. He knew. He knew… poor B… Ryuzaki lifted his long, pale finger…and flicked the bright yellow A hard. It fell backwards to the ground slowly, as if giving L one last moment to watch it's fall…then shattered. Yellow bricks breaking apart into unrecognisable chunks…
B started wailing again…
…
B never did have a chance to save A. He'd lost too much blood by the time B found him, and even if the blood hadn't killed him, the bottle of pills in his system surely would have... That was the day B had lost all sense of the world… and a few years later…
Once the date has been set, there is nothing you can do to change it
Nothing
.
A horrible, pain filled gasping noise emanated from the speakers, dragging Ryuzaki from his dark thoughts. A noise that could only have been made by one person…
"Watari…" Ryuzaki felt his heart shatter into a million pieces as he listened to his father figure and carer for all these years gasp in agony as his heart stopped beating in his chest. Press the button Wammy…
Click!
…No, wait, Wammy can't die yet! Ryuzaki hadn't told him how much he'd meant to him! Not properly! He hadn't told him of all the times he'd thought of him as a father. He hadn't thanked him for every little favour Watari had done him, the times he'd gone out of his way to find something to make Ryuzaki feel better, the times Ryuzaki knew full well he'd fallen asleep in front of his computer with exhaustion and woken up either in his bed or on the couch with a blanket wrapped warmly around him. He'd never got to thank him for making him feel safe, for protecting him from the people trying to hunt him down, for putting his life on the line every moment of every day… he never got to thank him for rescuing him from the streets. He'd never thanked him for saving B from the death sentence… he'd never apologised for all the times he'd ignored him. He'd never apologised for putting him at so much risk when he could have had a better life caring for the other orphans and creating his wonderful inventions. He'd never apologised for anything… He hadn't told him he really loved him, more than he had ever loved his broken family…
All Data Deleted
"Watari!" Ryuzaki cried, but it was too late. The connection had been lost.
Watari, Wammy, was dead. And it was all his fault… again…
Bong! Bong! Bong! Bong!
"Data deletion?! What's going on!" Aizawa demanded, fear creeping into the edges of his voice.
"I told Watari… to make sure that he should erase all information, in the event that something were to happen to him" Ryuzaki couldn't help the pain of Watari's loss seeping into his voice. He'd knew it would happen, but that didn't make it any easier to bare… he only just managed to find a way to prevent the painful prickles behind his eyelids from becoming the salty water of tears…
"If something were to happen to him…" Aizawa said.
"Could it be…?" Matsuda asked fearfully.
Yes, it could…
Ryuzaki felt a sense of dread overcome him. His clock had just told him it was officially 9:20…
BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG!
I hear the bells… there so damn persistent. They're waiting for me.
Ryuzaki sighed as he felt his veins growing colder, and not just because of fear or grief…the pills were setting in… Ryuzaki found the blur seeping into his vision oddly comforting…
Well then…I guess it's my turn to die…
Light's POV
Light didn't understand. Watari couldn't be dead! That wasn't supposed to happen! HOW! Had Misa accidentally done something wrong… or had Rem…
"Where is the Shinigami?" Ryuzaki asked urgently.
"Good question. I don't see it" Light's father spoke quickly as he sought the room for the god of death. Light turned to see that Rem was indeed gone. No! She can't have!
"It disappeared! What's going on!" Aizawa cried. No no no no no no! I told Rem… I TOLD REM NOT TO…!
"Everyone! The Shiniga-" Ryuzaki's voice suddenly cut itself off, as if his mouth had been smothered by a giant hand. Light turned back to see him completely ridged in his chair, as if... Light had frozen. What…It…it can't be…
The silver spoon slowly slipped from Ryuzaki's fingers and clattered to the desk. It was as if time had slowed to a crawl. Light could see Ryuzaki tipping to one side, as if he couldn't hold up his own weight anymore, and begin to fall. It was all happening in slow motion, as if someone had physically stopped the world from turning for just this moment. Light couldn't move. What is this? This can't be actually happening… this has to be a trick… L couldn't actually be…
But he was, he was really falling, his onyx black hair was trailing behind him as his body was only seconds away from smashing into the ground. The sight was so wrong…yet so beautiful… Light found himself diving towards him before the thought had fully formed in his mind. He dove for Ryuzaki, and only just managed to grab him before they both slammed into the ground. Light made sure he took the entire blow.
"Ryuzaki! What's wrong?!" Matsuda's cry seemed to echo in Light mind, as if he weren't quite hearing it right. Besides, how could he concentrate on anything but the man in his arms? He'd pulled Ryuzaki into the crook of his elbow, keeping him up off the ground with his hand around the back of his head.
Light couldn't stop staring at the raven haired man in disbelief. This cannot be happening! He'd told Rem to wait until… Until L posed a direct threat on you and Misa… Light felt his own heart stop as Ryuzaki's eyes stared almost blankly up at him, as if he couldn't actually see him anymore. This…can't….be… Ryuzaki can't really be…dying? I don't understand… he can't be…
…I did it… I did it! I-I DID IT! I'VE WON!
Before Light could stop him, Kira forced his way into the front of his body. He felt his lips twitch as Light was roughly shoved aside, and ever so slowly, began to spread into an insane grin. Power and triumph flooded Kira's veins as he stared at the man Light had made him hold, watching the tiny amount of colour L possessed drain away as he stared back up at him. We did it Light! L IS DEAD! WE KILLED HIM! NOW WE WILL BE THE GOD'S OF THE NEW WORLD! WE WILL-
NO STOP!
Before Light could force Kira away, Ryuzaki's face twisted into a look of utter betrayal. He'd seen Kira…he knew… Light slammed Kira down hard, making sure he couldn't resurface. But the damage had been done. Ryuzaki just looked at him, the pain of Light's betrayal clear on his every…dying feature. No, Ryuzaki I swear I didn't want this!
Light could feel tears brimming in his eyes. You can't die like this, not believing that I lied about loving you. Light slowly shook his head, slightly enough so that no one but Ryuzaki would notice, tears spilling from his eyes at last. Ryuzaki's face didn't change. He doesn't believe me… this is all my fault…
Before Light had even realised it, Ryuzaki's eyelids had slowly started sliding closed. His deep, black hoods bit by bit were sliding shut over his shimmering obsidian eyes. Their once brilliant, intelligent light was slowly dying, being replaced by a blank glaze. His face had gone lax, and his ridged body was slowly easing limply in Light's arms… was this really how peaceful death was? Could it…after a long, stretched out moment, his eyes had finally closed, leaving him looking as if he were only sleeping. Sleeping in Light's arms, like they had been before, like he'd always wanted him to be… So peaceful… yet… is he really… dead? He can't have…
For a moment…Light could have sworn he'd heard a soft, yet distant ringing of a bell…
All was silent…
"…Hey, Ryuzaki, come on! Snap out of it!" Light's voice was starting to betray the panic building in his chest. He shook the man in his arm's shoulder, as if this would somehow wake him up from his slumber. Of course, this didn't work.
"What happened?!" Light's father said in disbelief.
"What's going on!" Mogi's voice shook heavily.
I'm…I'm holding a dead body…He's dead… He's dead and I killed him! I KILLED RYUZAKI! I TOLD HIM I LOVED HIM AND THEN I KILLED HIM!
Before Light could stop himself, he screamed.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! AHH, HAHH!" Light screamed and gasped as his chest exploded into millions of sharp, piercing shards. He'd killed him! HE'D KILLED HIM! IT WAS ALL HIS FAULT! LIGHT HAD JUST KILLED THE MAN HE CLAIMED TO HAVE LOVED!
"Calm down Light!" His father gasped as his son screamed. Calm down? CALM DOWN!?
Kira didn't force his way in this time, he only gave Light the right words to use without betraying their secret, even though Kira was absolutely disgusted in Light right now. Actually, disgusted was a word way to kind to describe the absolute loathing boiling in Kira right now.
"WE'RE GONNA DIE! Watari, Ryuzaki, IT'LL BE US NEXT!"
Aizawa gasped and staggered backwards, tripping over his own feet in the process, eyes full of fear. Matsuda had cried out with terror, clutching his hands over his head as if this could protect him from death. Soichiro and Mogi both made noises of horror but stood ridged, as if unable to move. Kira glared at them all. Pathetic…
After about ten solid seconds of horror filled silence, Matsuda was the first to curl out of his ball of terror with a shaky glance at Light's father. Light couldn't hold himself back any longer.
"DAMN YOU! WHERE ARE YOU SHINIGAMI, COME OUT!" Light shrieked at the spot where Rem should have been.
"W-wait Light!" His father cautioned, but Light couldn't stop.
"You know something about this DON'T YOU!? COME ON OUT!" Tears were pouring from Light's eyes as he screamed, falling onto his clothes with little patters.
Silence was his only answer…
Aizawa had knelt down beside Light at some point, he wasn't too sure when, and was looking at Light with an odd expression. I can't just sit here, Rem has to pay. In one swift action, Light passed the limp form of Ryuzaki to Aizawa and stood, storming towards the doorway in a whirlwind of raging agony.
"We'd…we'd better go look too" Light's father's voice followed him through the doorway. He assumed he was talking to Matsuda.
"R-right" Matsuda murmured, confirming Light's thought.
"Mogi, take over for me" Aizawa said. Those useless men… why are you following me? Shouldn't you be calling a freaking ambulance! You could at least try to save him! There's nothing left to be saved Light. SHUT UP!
Light angrily wiped the tears from his eyes. That Shinigami was going to pay for this! The notebook… Kira, I don't have time for your nonsense- Light, we've got to get Rem's notebook! If any of the others find it, they'll destroy it instantly! We've got to save it! I DON'T CARE IF THEY DESTROY IT KIRA! REM KILLED RYUZAKI WITH IT, WHY THE FUCK SHOULD I GIVE A DAMN ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS TO IT!Because it's evidence against us! And besides, we can use it! What is the matter with you, we need another notebook!
Light supposed he was right, but he could hardly bear the thought of touching the object that killed the man he loved… Look, if you're too weak to do this, let me. No. You won't let me back in! Not if you're going to keep acting like this you're not! I get it, you need to mourn over that obstacle, so do it where the others can't see it! Do you want them to know about you and L? …No… Exactly. Let me be your hands, and I won't mess this up. …But… Alright… but…just leave me be…
Kira gratefully pushed himself forward in Light's mind, feeling stiff and sore from being away from it for so long. He'd forgotten what it was like to move again. He instantly made those stupid salty tears Light had left behind dry up. No signs of weakness. Gods don't cry.
Now then…if Rem was in the room when we entered…he would have gone through the wall on the right. That's the generator room. Kira looked over his shoulder to see the others still in the main room, meandering around uselessly. Really… and they call themselves detectives… Kira turned the corner and rushed towards the grey door Rem would almost certainly be in. It wasn't locked, thank god, so Kira pushed open the door easily.
He'd been right. Rem had been in here. Had being the key word there. Now, there was only a pile of dust. Not quite sand, not quite rust, but some unnamed element that should not exist in the world of the living. With a little shudder, Light pushed Kira aside and reached for the notebook. He brushed the shining greyish green sand off the black book and found the last used page. He had to see…
There, scrawled on the middle of the page were two words.
Quillsh Wammy
Light couldn't even bare to read the next one, but forced himself anyway. Huh…so that was his real name… such a beautiful name, and I hadn't even known… Light was on the verge of tears again. He could feel them brimming, his hands were starting to shake almost violently. In a sharp nudge, Kira forced his way back into command of Light's body, angrily brushing away his tears for a second time. Freaking sook, what was the point of crying like a baby over a stupid guy?! It wasn't like tears could bring the dead back to life, so what's the point? Kira stuffed the death note into the back of his pants and pushed his jacket over it.
With a disgruntled sigh, Kira forced himself to call the others.
"There's something here!" He called urgently. The footsteps of the other men echoed up the hallway as they ran to join him. They appeared a few moments later, standing dumbfounded in the doorway as they gazed at the sandy remains of the Shinigami, incomprehension plain on their every feature.
Soichiro Yagami was the first to squat beside the pile of unearthly material and studied it. Kira pretended to be interested as they discussed it.
"What the hell is this stuff?" Soichiro seemed to be talking to himself just as much as he was the others.
"Sand?" Matsuda suggested stupidly.
"What does this mean?" Soichiro asked again. Kira rolled his eyes. What the hell did he think it mean? Kira, let me back in, I can hold it now. Don't lie Light, I can feel you about to scream again. Just trust me, they'll need to hear me in pain or they'll get suspicious. …true…but if you start crying again like before… I won't…much…hopefully.
Kira rolled his eyes again, but let his crimson influence be overtaken by the warm brown of Light. A fresh wave of pain threatened to double him over, but Light fought against it. He managed to compose himself just enough to speak without breaking down completely.
"Whatever it might mean, whatever happens next, I swear I'll avenge Ryuzaki's death" Light's voice shook slightly with barely contained emotions. Because he meant it. Every word. He would find some way to make it up to Ryuzaki… maybe…
"We're going to solve this case, in honor of him…and to Watari, and ALL the other victims" Light practically snarled.
"Oh Light…" His father stood, looking at him with sympathy.
"Let's do this, for him" Aizawa said determinedly. Ryuzaki's death seemed to have barely fazed him…or he was just good at hiding his feelings. Light wasn't sure if it was the former or the latter… he hoped it was the latter…
"Yeah but…aren't we all going to get killed? Isn't that what all this really means?" Matsuda glanced away, being the first to voice what all the others must be thinking deep down.
"Matsuda…if you're afraid of dying, leave the investigation. We put our lives on the line and we chose to be here" Light said. Just like Ryuzaki did…and look where it got him. Light turned his back on the others, trying to compose himself the best he could.
"Uh, yeah, that's true" Matsuda muttered. "…But, its weird hearing you say that. You sound like Ryuzaki…"
Light began to walk away before he burst into agony filled sobs again. I sound like Ryuzaki? Ryuzaki should sound like Ryuzaki, not me! And whose fault is that? Mine. All mine. And none of you can even begin to understand that! He practically slammed the door behind him, leaving the NPA members to stare after him in confusion.
The crash of thunder rocked the building, and the rain still poured. It was as if the heavens were angry… and they should be. Light had killed the man he had loved, the man that had trusted him with his life, and he threw it into the jaws of death without even a blink of an eye. How could this have happened?! He'd told Rem not to kill him! He'd told Rem that he would figure this out, and to wait for further instructions! Light staggered around the corner, tears blurring his vision. His chest felt like it was about to explode. Maybe it should. Maybe Light should have died instead of Ryuzaki.
Don't ever say that again Light! You were better than he was! L was weak, he couldn't see our vision of a perfect world! He was a blind old fool!
No he wasn't, he was a genius. Maybe we're the ones who are weak and blind. What are we even doing? Killing people we've never even met, who probably have families, just by scribbling a few words on a blank sheet of paper. That's not noble. That's just hiding behind the face of a Shinigami.
You're wrong Light. We have the power to change the world. In fact, we already are. Can't you see that! We are stronger than the Shinigami, we don't hide behind them! We've only borrowed their weapon that they mistreated. That black book on your back is the tool to change the world into a better place, and we'll be the ones to brandish it before the world. We'll be heroes, gods! Those "Few words on a blank sheet of paper" are the most powerful thing a human being could ever even dream of accomplishing! We are not weak. We're strong. And we are certainly not blind, for we saw the world for what it truly was and saw the means to change it. If Ryuzaki couldn't see that, then we aren't the ones that are wrong. He was.
Light hadn't realized he'd sunk to the floor until he'd felt the wetness against his cheek as the tears gathered on the cold steel of the stair case. He'd curled up into a ball against the wall, not caring about the sharp edges digging into his side.
We're just teenagers…
We're not gods Kira.
Matsuda's POV
It took all of Matsuda's self-control not to follow Light from the room and attempt to comfort him. He could see Light's pain clearly etched into his every feature, no matter how hard he'd tried to hide it. And it killed Matsuda not being able to tell Light… no, don't even think about it. Ryuzaki told me to keep it a secret. Light mustn't know what I know. I promised.
Matsuda stood with a stretch and sniffed. He was still in shock. Ryuzaki couldn't be dead. It didn't make sense! Ryuzaki was L, the world's greatest detective. He couldn't be dead could he? Besides…hadn't Ryuzaki told him he was going to try and… Did it not work? Matsuda reached for the tissue in his pocket to wipe his nose. He looked really gross when he cried, and snot really didn't help. He'd stuck his hand in his jacket pocket when he felt it. Something thin, maybe made of some sort of metal that he'd defiantly hadn't put there, brushed his hand. He blinked and glanced in his pocket without removing it.
A…A USB? When did that get there? I don't even own a USB… Matsuda gazed at it in confusion. How did…wait…did Ryuzaki…? No way! He couldn't of, could he?! Matsuda slipped it back in his pocket before anyone else noticed. Not that they were paying him any attention, they never did.
"It's like…rust or something, but not rust… d-do you reckon the Shinigami had something to do with this?" Aizawa asked the room.
"Maybe…it has disappeared after all. Maybe something happened to it" The chief suggested.
"I guess so, it's gone after all" Matsuda agreed.
"We should probably keep looking though, just in case we find something more" Soichiro said, turning away from the pile of ash/sand/rust stuff and opening the door.
"Right" Aizawa nodded. Matsuda grunted halfheartedly. He let the other two lead him from the tiny room without complaint. They were discussing something Matsuda couldn't care enough to hear.
Ryuzaki promised he'd be there 'til the end. He can't have really died…but…Ryuzaki said the chances of his plans working was low so…maybe he really did… Oh god, how am I supposed to do this alone! I promised Ryuzaki I would be the one to do it, but I sort of hoped- no, needed to have Ryuzaki there beside me, to make sure I was doing the right thing. I don't know if I can do this… No…no I promised. I'll figure it all out when the time comes, but until then, I'll fulfill the easiest promise. I need to look after Light for him…
Matsuda let the other two disappear around the corner. He didn't want them to know. Only Matsuda was allowed to know, just as Ryuzaki had said. Where the heck could Light have even gone? This place is too massive! Matsuda turned down the next corridor, away from the chief and Aizawa, and began to listen out for Light.
It had only been about a minute or so later when Matsuda heard something echo up the corridor, like something being torn in two. What the… Oh, it was a sniffle. Matsuda shook his head. How didn't he get that the first time? Matsuda took a few steps around the corner and froze.
Light was curled up against the wall, half on half off the first step of the pure white staircase. Matsuda couldn't see his face properly, his arms hand curled over his head oddly, but he could tell Light was crying. No, scratch that. Light was sobbing harder that Matsuda had thought possible. His entire body was shaking, practically convulsing with each heave of his chest. Light coughed from the force of his own tears and sniffed loudly.
"…Can't believe I let this happen to him" Light's voice was muffled by his hands and barely audible, but Matsuda strained his ears and caught it. Just.
"I never should have…" Matsuda didn't catch the last bit. Light gave another heaving sob, making Matsuda's resolute to remain hidden to waver. There was a pause that Matsuda couldn't explain... It was as if Light was listening to something.
"No I shouldn't of! Why can't you just understand!" Light growled to himself. Is…is he talking to himself?
"Bullshit you understand! All you've ever done is hate him, you barely even let me like him without bitching constantly! I love him for god's sake, why don't you s-see" Light broke off with another sob. What the hell is going on? I don't understand, was Ryuzaki actually right about… what he told me Light had was real? I can't believe it… he can't be…
"No, he wasn't lying. HE WASN'T! Ryuzaki DID love me, it wasn't a trick! Just shut up already, you should be happy! Leave me alone!"
Matsuda couldn't believe it. Light was talking to himself. That means Ryuzaki was right…mostly. Matsuda still couldn't force himself to believe Light was Kira, it was impossible Light was Kira, he was no murderer. But he believed Ryuzaki in saying he had that…that…uhg, what's it called again? God, he had the memory of a goldfish sometimes… why couldn't he remember something this important! He knew it started with the letter S at least…he'll look it up later.
"Yeah, well sometimes I wish you weren't! This is my body ok?! And if you're not happy with what I do with it, get the fuck out! I am sick and tired of all this bullshit, I'm sick of what you make me do, and I'm sick of all this death! All I wanted was Ryuzaki, and you couldn't even let me have that could you! You are so selfish K- GAH!"
Matsuda blinked in surprise as Light gasped. He sounded as if he were in pain, he even convulsed a few times. Matsuda wasn't going to lie, it was scary to watch. Light twitched and clawed at his head.
"NO, STOP, AHH!" Light shrieked. Matsuda was about to rush out and ask Light what was wrong…when he replied.
"Never! You are weak Light! And if you're going to be like this, this body deserves to be mine! L was weak, and I'm glad he's gone. Now, shut the fuck up and deal with it!"
Not quite believing what he was hearing, Matsuda took a peek around the corner. Light was hunched over, breathing heavily, his fingers curled into angry claws and he glared at the floor. Matsuda could just make out his face from here…and Ryuzaki had been right. He could see them clearly now, a radiant crimson glaring at the stairs before his hands, eyes narrow slits. Ryuzaki was right…
"…Heheh, no. I let you have your sook Light. Now it's my turn to fix all this mess you made. You want to scream and cry again? Do it in there, where no one can here you. I have work to do…"
Matsuda ran away. He couldn't comprehend what he was seeing…no, that was a lie. He could… but he didn't want to. He WON'T believe it. Light can't be, he just can't!
But if he was…then why was Ryuzaki making Matsuda look after him? Matsuda remembered something else too, something else that Matsuda also refused to believe he'd have to do.
"You're the best shot I have. I trust you. You have to be the one to do it Matsuda"
But… why did… Ryuzaki…
If Matsuda understood right… then this was just too cruel. It had better work…
Kira's POV
Kira grinned and stretched his limbs. It felt so good to be in full control at last. This is what Light had felt everyday, while Kira had just sat there and watched. Well, now it's my turn to be free.
I can't believe you did this Kira, let me out! Light protested from the corner of Kira's mind. Not until you get a hold of yourself! I never thought you'd ever turn into a snivelling wreck over this! I am not a wreck… I think…
Kira rolled his eyes and stretched his legs out. He was all stiff from Light's stupid position on the stairs. His face felt all salty and weird from the tears Light had decided to dribble all over place, and he rubbed at it furiously. I swear to god, did you have to have to sit like that? I can hardly feel my legs anymore. My legs, and I don't care.
Thunder boomed through the building once again, the lights flickering slightly. The power had only just come back to normal, and it was going again. Uhg…stupid building. Kira wiped his nose on the back of his hand, then his hand on his leg, before starting forward. He had to go back there and play the sad fool. He couldn't just loiter around the building all day…night.
Kira strode forward, his footsteps loud and proud against the tiled floor. The windows beside him erupted with flashes of light as rain and lightning burst from the sky, unable to reach him. Kira glanced at the splatter covered glass and watched Light walking beside him. Sure, their movements were just copies of one another, but Light's face was drawn into what looked like a permanent melancholy. His brown eyes stared back at Kira sadly. What happens now then Kira? Light's mouth moved in the reflection, but Kira heard the voice in his head as per usual.
"Now, we do what we want"
I've gotten rid of everyone in my way.
Lightening lit up the building, casting deadly yet welcome light glancing across Kira's triumphant grin, completely consuming Light from the reflection, leaving only Kira.
I am the god of the new world!