Okay so I noticed some reviews about people wanting Brittany out of the tags so I took her off out of respect. But she will be in this fanfic from time to time. Just letting you know!

Pain - nothing describes pain as much as the word 'love' ever could. You fall in love and your whole world becomes blank. You see nothing but the person you want. In some situations it can mean only good news. In others, you're lost. The constant fear of ever losing them haunts you. Whoever you dedicate all your love to, it makes you wish you could embrace them until the end of time. Until nothing but dry land and dark skies exist and every single organism gets sucked into either a dark or light place. That's fully up to who you choose to be - who you chose to be. And everything - just like when you're in love - is blank. And for me, blank hurts. Blank is dead, it has no color. Yet, I for each second that passed got more and more bewitched by the spell I was held under. It was another kind of love I had fallen in.

"Nothing beats this" she said.

"This?" I asked.

"Us, just us. Nothing or no one else. You know? I'm the happiest when we're alone"

"Isn't that pretty obvious?" I smiled. "I mean, of course.. When we're alone I can do this whenever I want to. Like this for example" I leaned on her shoulder. "Or this" I looked up at her and the hazel eyes struck me right in the chest. I leaned in for a touch of the sweet, in someway fruit tasting lips, a bit like cherries.

"Or this.." she smiled. Her hand brushed through my hair.

The park was awfully empty. It was shocking because the weather was incredible and it was getting dark, so people usually came to the park to take long walks or just hang out. The way we did. Me and Quinn didn't say much for a while. My mind - me, I was trying to figure out how to tell Quinn about what happened with Brittany. For some seconds I decided not to tell her, that it would be better if she didn't know about it. The moment was so perfect I didn't want to ruin it. I knew she would get really upset. I knew it would ruin their friendship even more. Did I really want to be the reason Quinn loses her best friend? Still, it felt like they only were best friends from Quinn's point of view. I gathered all courage I could and watched her with her head leaned on the big tree we were supporting our backs on. She looked so peaceful - it was comforting to see, it made me calm, fulfilled.

"Quinn," she quickly turned her head, slowly opening her eyes again "I need to tell you something"

"You can tell me anything" she said, her voice came out viscous.

"Um" I cleared my throat and sat up straight. I moved to sit in front of her with my legs crossed. "You remember I went to the movies with Mercedes and Brittany the other day"

"I do" she said, leaning straight on the tree trunk.

"Something happened, it's not really a big, big deal" I brushed my hand against the grass under me.

"What happened?" she asked, this time sounding more interested in what I had to say.

"Brittany," I said "she told me, or she - she admitted she has feelings for me"

"Oh," she smirked "didn't I tell you?" she didn't sound upset at all. Only bored.

"You're not angry?"

"No," she said "I know I can be jealous. Or, I mean, she can't do anything anyway. I know you wouldn't let her" she looked serious. "Correct me if I'm wrong" her voice became demanding.

"She also kissed me, when she drove me home" I said with confidence.

"She kissed you?" her eyes widened. "Brittany kissed you" her eyes started up a fire. "And, what did you do?" the no longer bored, confused voice said.

"I pushed her off, I told her I was with you.." I couldn't help but smiling for some reason.

"I really, really just got the urge to punch the living shit out of her stupid face" she let out a smile as a respond to mine.

"You won't hurt her right?" I worried "Please?"

"What do you think of me?" she laughed. "I won't hurt her, I won't mention it to her" she said. "But Santana?"

"Yes?" I was relieved.

"I have one condition" her eyes were serious.

"Anything"

"You cut her off, for good" she said.

"What?" I blurted. "Quinn, I can't do that"

"Why not? What's more important to you, my happiness or being friends with Brittany?" she calmly asked. I was beyond surprised over how Quinn reacted. I really was. "I just don't want you to be around someone I can't trust being near you"

"You said yourself you know I wouldn't let her touch me.."

"Yet she did" Quinn said. "Santana, I know Brittany. She's a really sweet, caring girl, but she can't take no for an answer when she's after something, in this case someone"

"So you suggest I end my friendship with her?" I plead. "How do I do that?" I asked.

"Well, you could just ignore her calls and texts, don't go out with her?" Quinn suggested.

"This is stupid.. She just has a little crush"

"Santana" she jeered.

"Quinn"

"You need to cut her off" she was still calm, I was still waiting for the jealous eruption. "I'm asking you as your girlfriend to stop seeing her, I'm not comfortable with it" her voice was sooting, a voice I never in a million years could deny.

"But.."

"I'll be really happy, I just don't want her around you.. Or the other way around"

I did nothing else about it. I agreed to end my friendship with Brittany. Of course, I wasn't happy about it. Brittany was my friend and I really liked her that way. Still, Quinn being happy was by far more important to me than having Brittany in my life.
I watched Quinn lean her head back on the trunk as I sat back beside her. I still wasn't used to the fact that Quinn was calm. That she didn't rise up with rage, that she didn't raise her voice and that she didn't threaten to kill Brittany. I was surprised she was nice about it. It was in some way appalling seeing her that way. However, I didn't complain.

When I got home, I was both relieved and a bit sad about having to block Brittany out. After all, it was over with. Quinn knew and she wasn't upset. That was what mattered. I sighed in alleviation. I got into out of the shower and pulled up my underwear. I sat down to put body butter on my legs. I usually stood up when I did it but I felt rather tired. I rubbed it against my calves, up to the knees and then my thighs. I looked down at the almost fully healed scar - the reason I never wore shorts during the whole summer and let out a loud exhale. I brushed my finger against the smooth, still clinging after the body butter skin. I could almost not even feel the scar any longer. I stood up, unsteady. I walked towards the cabinet and took out my blade. The one I recently "made". I took a long look at it and then down at my thigh, on the healing scar. I hadn't touched my skin in any self harming way for months. Still, the compulsion was killing me. I, like the last time, brushed the blade against myself.. Just feeling it on my skin. It was like when someone who used to smoke - quits, then they constantly smell cigarettes and the urge to have one follows them. I once again was too weak to pull it off. I threw it back in my little box and laid it back in the cabinet along with all the other stuff. I pulled my sweatpants on and the baby blue t-shirt. I wirled the towel around my wet hair and walked out.

"Santana, come here for a second" I heard my mother call. I walked into the living room.

"What is it?"

"When are you bringing your friend for dinner?" she asked, a smile grew on her lips.

"Mom" I sighed.

"Well you promised us!" she reminded.

"Can't you just go on without having to properly meet her?" I sassed.

"No, you said you loved her" she laughed "of course I want to meet her then"

I rolled my eyes and headed towards my room again. I knew I wouldn't get away with it so I would ask Quinn to come over for dinner some day.

I know this was very short for me (I usually write longer chapters) but I didn't want to make it too long and boring for you! I promise you longer and more exciting chapters are coming :) Don't forget to review!