Ruby is standing on a soap box.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the joining of these two souls!"

Weiss leans over and whispers to Blake. "What is this, a funeral?"

Ruby shouted down at them. "Quiet in the ranks!" She cleared her throat and continued. "Now, as I'm sure you've all heard, predictability is the enemy of humor!"

Blake and Weiss jumped back in surprise. Weiss stuttered a bit, trying to figure out where Ruby's tone had changed. "W-what, wait, what? You just- huh?"

Ruby jumped forward, pointing right at Weiss' face. "We shall now establish the rules of this story! Is that understood, Private?!"

Weiss shouted back, utterly terrified. "Y-yes Ma'am!"

Ruby stepped back, then started pacing with her hands clasped behind her back. "The first rule of RubyRolled: You do not talk about RubyRolled. The second rule of RubyRolled: You do not talk about RubyRolled."

Blake raised her hand. "So what are you doing?"

Ruby leaned in at Blake, growling menacingly. "I'm talking about rules. You got a problem with that, Lieutenant?"

Weiss spoke up. "Wait a minute! How come I'm a Private and she's a Lieutenant?"

Ruby stood up, eying Weiss. "Your full rank is Minor Junior Private Negative First Class. Get used to it." She cleared her throat again. "Continuing. Third rule of RubyRolled: Unpredictable equals funny, random does not equal funny, random does not equal unpredictable. Fourth rule of RubyRolled: No less than one pop culture reference per chapter. Fifth rule of RubyRolled: Remember at all times that this humor is being performed as an art form, and while we take suggestions from reviewers, we do not cater to the every whim of our audience."

Blake spoke up. "Uh, yes we do. We totally do."

Ruby crossed her arms in front of her. "Very well then. You may kiss the bride."

Blake and Weiss looked at each other and turned red. Blake shook her head. "Forget I said anything. You're right."

Weiss raised her hand, trying to change the subject. "Ma'am, if I may? What rank are you?"

Ruby shrugged and sighed. "My rank is Colonel, if you must know."

Weiss pressed on. "And what about Yang? Where even is she?"

Yang stepped out of the shadows. She was wearing a general's uniform, cap and all, aviator shades on and a corncob pipe in mouth. She spoke around the unlit pipe. "That's enough questions, Private. The Colonel doesn't have to put up with your queries any longer."

Weiss stood up to face General Yang. "Now listen here, you pudding head! I am the heiress to the Schnee Dust Corporation, and you will begin to show me some respect! I demand it! I've had enough of your Colonels and Generals ordering around my Privates, and-" Yang and Ruby had burst out laughing. Weiss shouted at them. "Shut up! A-and besides! How are we supposed to all be on the same team when our ranks are so wildly different? There's no way any Private or even a Lieutenant or Colonel would be permitted to sleep in the same room as a General."

That's when Weiss' world turned upside down. Or rather, Yang turned upside down. It hadn't even occurred to Weiss how none of the others were moving at the same time, but she realized it now. Nora stood behind where Yang had been standing, holding sideways a cardboard cutout of Yang dressed like a General. Nora gathered up the other two cardboard cutouts and bolted out the door, leaving Weiss standing stunned in the middle of her room.

"What... in the blazes just happened?"

Coming Soon... Outtakes From RWBY!

'Soon' like really soon, like here it is.

Roman Torchwick walked casually down the street. People shrank away from his presence, and that of the four armed henchmen at his side. Thy reached the threshold of a small dust shop. Roman opened the door and stepped in. The henchmen followed one by one. He approached the counter, leaning on it menacingly. The notorious criminal opened his mouth to speak to the frightened shopkeeper.

"Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a dub- bleah!" He burst out laughing at his own flub.

"Cut!"

Roman stood up straight. "I'm sorry! That was my fault."

Across the room, as the camera crew prepared for another take, Jaune and Neptune exchanged a few words with the creator of the series they were filming.

Ren waved them off. "Chill, man. He's great at this. Just give him a moment. There's a lot of terminology in the world and we just got the guy a week ago."

Jaune shrugged. "Alright. Your story. Your world."

Neptune checked the script over again. "Yeah, okay... alright, let's go people. The night is young, but we have a lot of work to do while it's still dark out. We want to get as much done as possible."

Roman stood just off to the side of the camera so that he could walk into view on queue. "Dust. It's dust. Dust, dust, dust, dust. Okay, I got it."

The camera started rolling, Neptune counted down, and then pointed at Roman. "And action."

Roman stepped up to the counter, leaning against it. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a dust shop open this late?"

There was a small sneeze.

Everyone in the room turned and looked at Ruby, standing in the back. She turned red. "Ah... *boop*."

Author's Notes: This is the beginning of RWBY Outtakes, a segment where I treat the RWBY show like the characters are actors playing themselves in a fictional series created by Ren. Let me know if you think it's an idea worth keeping around and exploring further.

On another note, please feel free to suggest ideas, send in your characters for the chance to see them appear, and crazy concepts for Nora's next prank. Anything you like. Tell me what you think. I love to interact.