Hello... It's me.
At some point when I'm hugging Minho it starts to rain. I can tell from the way it hits the roof of the building, and when there are holes in the ceiling it drips down onto the floor. The sound is almost like a lullaby, making me feel drowsy despite the way my heart is racing. My eyes start to drift shut and I begin to fade away into a realm of sleep...
Then a wave of nausea racks my body. I push away from Minho and clamp a hand over my mouth as I crawl away from the Familiars. The food I ate earlier is clawing it's way out of my stomach. I try to push it back down, but to no avail. My stomach lurches and throw up next to a fallen steel beam as I taste beans for the second time today. The water I drank comes up with it and and my stomach becomes as empty as it was before. Dry heaves cause my shoulders to shake and my stomach to knot. I clench my fists and unclench them, waiting for the dizziness to pass.
" Is everyone okay? " Thomas asks and I hear him shuffle around behind me, no doubt counting the Familiars to see how many are left. I didn't see any go down during that storm, but who knows how long they were running through it?
Minho and I both groan a no at the same time. I was starting to feel better, but now I'm back to square one. Once again, I feel like I'm dying. Minho probably feels the same with all the burns covering his body.
I turn around to see him slowly sitting up with another groan. His whole body probably aches. I've been electrocuted before, but never hit by lightning. It has to be ten times worse.
" Can't be too bad if you can do that. " Thomas says with a grin. His eyes dart over in my direction, asking the silent question ' Are you okay? ' and I nod my head yes. The slight movement causes the world to tilt and I have to squeeze my eyes shut.
" I'm tougher than nails, " Minho responds, " I could still kick your pony-lovin' butt with twice this amount of pain. "
" I do love ponies. I could eat one right about now. " As if on cue, his stomach growls. I don't know what I'll do about the food situation. Brenda and Jorge are somewhere in this building and I know they have food, but I can't keep it down. Maybe I should just try something other than beans, I don't know.
" Did Thomas the boring slinthead just make a joke? " Minho asks and I open my eyes to find him casting a sidelong glance at Newt. My eyes follow his and find Newt, who's staring at me. His arms are crossed over his chest, but something is mixed in his features. Hurt? I don't know. I avert my eyes before I can figure it out.
" I think so. " Newt shrugs and I feel his accusing gaze leave my body.
" I'm a funny guy. " Thomas sits down on the concrete floor next to Minho.
" Sure you are. " Minho mumbles and looks my way. I would've smiled if I didn't feel so exhausted again. This damned infection is kicking my ass. I won't survive as long as I have it. " What happened to you? "
" I got dumped in the middle of the Scorch and then I came here. " I say weakly, leaving the part about traveling with Nandini out. I wonder where she is, anyway. Where ever she is, I hope she's okay.
" Why do you look like shit? " Frypan asks, getting straight to the point. I let out a breathy laugh. Saying that I got bit by Newt's mom as I tried to kill her for attacking Nandini doesn't seem like the smartest thing to say.
" Dumped in a desert with no food, water, shelter, or any idea of where I was going? " I say, folding my legs underneath me slowly and hissing when I accidentally put too much pressure on the bite, " You'd look like shit too. "
" What's with the bandage? " Newt asks, gesturing towards the white cloth on my leg with his eyebrows drawn together. I hear something shift from behind me, but I pay no mind to it. Brenda and Jorge are here and they won't let us get hurt, I don't think.
" I got bit. " I say quietly and nearly flinch at the dead silence after that. Raising my voice a little I add: " But I'm okay. I'll manage. "
I won't mention how I thought I had died yesterday when I collapsed.
My eyes start to close again but I force them open. I have to know what happened while I was gone. I have to know what the Scorch Trials actually are, so I can protect them. And maybe save myself in the process.
" What exactly happened after I left? " I ask while fighting a yawn. I'm always so tired nowadays. I feel as though I'll close my eyes and fall into a deep slumber, not waking for a couple years, or never if I die. A couple of the Familiars shift on their feet, and I realize something. Winston isn't there. Either he's out in the Scorch, or he died.
Eh. That sucks.
" Janson told us we had two weeks to cross the Scorch. " Thomas says, slouching over and putting his chin in his hand while resting his elbow on his knee.
" And why don't you guys just go to a different city? " I say, resting a hand on my knee. " I hear Denver is really nice. "
" They said that if we made it, we'd all get the cure. "
Wait. What?
" We all have the Flare. " Newt adds in and I feel my eyes widen. That's impossible! Minho, Frypan and Thomas are immune—that much I know. But what if Lee lied to me about that? I don't know what anything is anymore. If Newt has the Flare…Then I failed at protecting him.
I failed another person.
I feel my shoulders sag. Thomas said something about a cure though. Cross the Scorch in two weeks and get the cure! If WICKED already has the damn cure then what are we going through all this for? Do they just like torturing kids? Something about this doesn't seem right. I can try to get answers out of Brenda, but who knows how much of the truth she actually knows?
If there's a cure—a real cure that will get rid of the Flare—then there's no reason Newt can't see his sister. If he has the Flare then I suppose I can tell him why I was keeping him from his sister in the first place. Maybe he'll understand and will stop being so hostile towards me.
" Newt, " I say in a weak voice, " Can I talk to you? "
He eyes me for a second before nodding his head. Then, like a total ass, he walks past me and towards the other side of this huge building. Doesn't he know I can't walk?
Actually, I haven't tried so I don't really know.
I get up onto my knees, wincing with each slight movement. The building starts to dance around me, making me sway just sitting there. The Familiars chatter among themselves, not acknowledging the fact that I am struggling. I use my arms and push off the ground in an effort to take some of the strain off my legs. It works, slightly, and I'm able to stand. But I'm putting most of my weight onto my left leg—the uninjured one.
So, I'm standing. Now comes the hard part.
Gritting my teeth, I take a step. Pain shoots up through my leg and to my back and I whimper a little.
" Louisa, are you okay? " I hear Minho ask. I nod my head yea as I take another step. Or at least I try to take another step, but the world blurs together as I fall. My head hits the ground causing a splitting headache to surge through my skull. I groan and clutch my head just as Minho says:
" No you're not. "
" I'm fine. " I groan the words out just as someone touches my shoulder. I look up and see Newt—he looks like he's swaying but it's probably just me—starting down at me with with an apologetic look on his face.
" Sorry. " He says holding his hand down, " I thought you said you were okay. "
He should already know that I lie about that all the time. I feel him drifting away from me just because I lied to him once. It's like he thinks he can't trust me. I want things to be the way they were before he found out about Nandini. I was semi-happy with my life then.
No, I won't let Newt define me. The love I feel for him has consumed me, making him the only thing that mattered most. That has to change. He's important, and I would do anything for him, but there are other things more important than a petty, teenage romance. I let him become the crutch that I leaned on, but I'm strong enough to walk by myself.
Hypothetically speaking, that is.
" I am okay. " I say the words through gritted teeth while trying to stop the world from spinning. I force myself to stand again, blocking the pain out. Newt watches with hurt flashing across his face, but then he schools his features into an apathetic stare as I limp towards the far end of the building.
I can do this. I just have to tell him that he isn't immune and that that's the reason why I lied to him.
He has to understand.
…...
She refused my help.
I offered my hand and she just ignored it.
That's never happened before. I hate it. I want her to be able to rely on me. Have I really been that hostile towards her? I just…I just need to figure my feelings out before I can attempt to forgive her. She lied to me about Nandini. Who knows what else she lied about?
But being away from her hurts more than anything. I miss her hugs, the way her smile lights up her face, the fire that's constantly flickering behind her eyes, her kisses. I miss her.
That's one of the only reasons I'm following her as she limps towards the other side of this building. Louisa looks like absolute hell. Her arms and neck are sunburnt, but her face is pale and she's limping. It reminds me of when she shattered her foot back in the Glade. But this time, she got bit. By a Crank.
I know she already had the Flare, but what happens if you get bit and you have it? Does it accelerate the affects? I really hope it doesn't because I can't lose her.
She stops walking and sits on an old wooden desk. It creaks beneath her weight but she ignores it as she pushes her hair over her shoulder. At first she looks at her feet—the old boots look like they've been mauled by a chain saw—but then her eyes rise to meet mine, and I'm shocked by the emptiness there. The past couple of times I've met her gaze she's averted her attention to something else, and now I know why. She didn't want me to see the emptiness and loss and sorrow there.
" Look, " Louisa says, " I know you hate me and whatever, but can you please not look at me like that? "
" Like what? "
" Like I'm a lost puppy. " She says, but then shakes her head. " You all have the Flare? "
I nod.
" And you're on your way to go get the cure? "
I nod again. She sways a bit as she sits there and she grips the desk so tight her knuckles turn white.
" I'm sorry. " She says, " I'm sorry I lied to you about your sister. I was only doing it to protect you. "
My blood starts to boil again. This? This is what she wanted to talk to me about?
" You told me that. " The words come out neutral instead of hostile but she still flinches as if I had yelled.
" But now… " She trails of and looks at the ground. " Now you already have the Flare, and there's a cure. "
My eyebrows draw together in confusion. " What are you talking about? "
" The world is split into two groups: Immune and non-immune. " She starts to sway again, " Everyone in this room is sorted into those two categories. I found out who belongs where when Lee told me. "
She bites her lip and I shift my weight from one foot to the other, growing impatient.
" You aren't immune Newt. " She says the words so quietly I almost miss them. " When I saw your sister and knew she was a Crank, I—I really wanted to tell you, but I didn't want to risk you getting the Flare. "
The anger that was building up inside me dissipates. I'm not immune. My sister is a Crank. I think I can see where Louisa is coming from, but still. It wasn't her decision. It wasn't right for her to keep something like that from me! If I want to risk my life and spend my last few months with family then I will.
" That wasn't your bloody choice. "
" I know that now. It was wrong of me to do that. You have to understand why I did it! " Louisa looks up at me, her eyes watery and her voice shaky.
" Why are you telling me this now? " I ask, crossing my arms over my chest. It's probably another selfish reason of hers. The thing about Louisa is she'll do anything for her family, or to avenge them. If that requires using us, i don't think she'd hesitate.
" I'm dying Newt. " Louisa stands and tries to walk closer to me but it's like she's drunk. She falls forward and I quickly catch her, holding her close. " I want things to be right between us. "
The room is dead silent. I can hear every single one of my heartbeats thumping in my chest as she looks up at me, patiently waiting to see if I'll forgive her. I don't doubt her when she says she's dying, I just don't want to believe it. I won't let her die, but if she does I can't let her think the way she is right now.
I lift my hand and brush a piece of her hair behind her ear then rest my hand on her cheek.
" I don't hate you. "
It's like a weight was lifted off her shoulders because she collapses into me, hugging me tightly. I rest my chin on the top of her head, feeling whole once again. This is what I missed.
" I could never hate you. " I mumble the words into her hair and her grip loosens on me. Her arms fall to her sides and I pull away to find her eyes shut, her long eye lashes brushing the top of her cheeks. I lightly shake her shoulders. " Louisa? "
She doesn't react.
" Louisa! " I say it a little louder and shake her shoulders a little harder. Panic is all I feel as I put my head to her chest, listening for a heartbeat. I calm down a bit when I hear it, erratic but still there nonetheless. She's still alive, for now.
I can't wait for the day when I don't have to think that anymore. A day when she can be happy and safe. A day when all of us can be happy and safe.
I look over at my shoulder at all of the Gladers. They occasionally cast glances over here, curious, but they mainly just talk. They're probably trying to distract themselves from the problem at hand, but not Minho. He's not talking to any of them. He's simply staring straight ahead, right at Lo and me.
Heat fills my veins again.
I don't know what has happened between Louisa and Minho, but I really hope it was nothing. The way Louisa cried when she thought he was dead… I didn't even see her cry like that when her family died. Of course, she has her memories from before the Maze. Perhaps they were best friends before?
Yea, friends. Nothing more.
Minho definitely doesn't feel that way. I can tell just by the way he looks at her. It's the same way I look at her. I hope he knows she doesn't feel the same way.
I pick the unconscious Louisa up and start to walk back to the Gladers. I watch my feet, making sure I don't trip over anything. She already fell and hit her head once—I don't want that to happen again. The ground is littered with various things: empty food cans, fallen pieces of steel, wooden crates. I can feel everyone's eyes on us as I lay her down next to Frypan. I notice a small bag that's strapped on her back, but I don't pay much attention to it.
" What did you do to her? " Minho asks, his eyes darting between Louisa and me.
" She's not feeling well. She passed out. " I say while sitting down next to her. I grab her hand to hold and I see blood caked under her fingernails. It's probably from when she came across the Crank that bit her. Or maybe it's her own blood from when she bandaged the wound on her right leg.
" Do you think we're almost there? " Frypan asks, changing the subject from Louisa.
" No. " Thomas says while retying his shoe. " I mean, we've gone halfway just about. But there's still a long way to go. "
" And now we have to carry around a cripple. " Aris adds, narrowing his eyes at Louisa. I glare at him.
" What if it were Rachel? " Tommy asks, sending a pointed look at Aris. His eyes widen and he seems to scoot back a little bit. " That's what I thought. She's a Glader, part of the family. Even if she's sick and dying we'll stay with her until the end. "
Why does Thomas have such a strong connection with Louisa? I mean, he barely knows her. I guess he's just a good person and feels that everyone is worth saving. The way he treated people at the Glade was similar to the way he's treating her. With kindness.
A slow clap makes everyone turn their heads. A man in his thirties walks out of the shadows with a smile on his face. I scoot closer to Louisa and block her from his view.
" How sweet. " He says, " I didn't know we'd be getting dessert tonight. "
" Who the hell are you? " Minho growls the words, moving closer to Louisa as well. I catch the slight movement out of the corner of my eye as I'm glaring at the stranger.
" My name is Jorge, " He throws his arms out, gesturing around him, " And I'm the Crank that runs this place, hermano. "
I hope you guys didn't mind the POV switch. I just kind of felt like writing in Newt's POV.
LEWT IS BEING MENDED. SLOWLY BUT SURELY.
I love writing this. Have I said that before? I'll say it again. I'm having a lot of fun writing this. I love it.
I bought the Scorch Trials on my iPad yesterday and I watched it. It gave me a lot of ideas that I could incorporate into Fighting For You, but I'm still going to stay true to the book.
This fanfic is also shaping up to be longer than Fighting Against You. Be excited about that. XD
I'm going to make a fiction press account under the same name as this one. I'm excited about that too.
Remember, have a good day, night, morning, evening, afternoon! I shall go read a little or something.