I Love You Just the Way You Are
Bridget Cummings walked into Helena's office slowly, looking behind her, hoping the reason for the look on everyone's faces was somewhere there. "Ladies?" she said hesitantly, as she approached, most concerned about the welcoming look in Helena's eyes. "Why do I feel like the fly about to walk into the spider's web?" she asked, expressing her feeling at the moment.
Irene turned back, looking up at Helena who stood there already assessing how to make this work. "Helena, please," Irene implored.
"This is who she picked?" Gloria asked of the perfectly coiffed, well-dressed woman, sashaying towards them.
"Don't let her exterior fool you, Nurse Brown," Helena whispered. "Bridget is the epitome of 'take me as I am; faults and all'."
Still feeling like a specimen under the microscope, the investment banker approached closer. "Now I know how people feel when they have that naked in front of an audience' dream," Bridget said and Gloria laughed. "Actually, that's one of my favorite dreams," Bridget decided, now that she thought about it. "We have an appointment, Helena, but if you're not done…," she started, but Helena assured her they were just beginning.
"We should go," Irene tried, but Helena insisted she could use the HR Director's insight into people's behaviors. Irene stood up anyway. "Helena, I want to go on record as saying that the only thing Myka ever wants…. is you …to be you," the woman declared.
"Anyone want to tell me what this is about, or should I just wait…over there?" Bridget asked, pointing to the other side of the room.
"Don't be silly," Helena said and then scoffed at Irene's unwillingness to participate. "Your presence is most needed, Bridget. You see, Myka is…rather…moody of late," she shared slowly and Bridget smiled.
"All those hormones," the banker assessed, her hands making angry fists flying in the air. "Babies do that do you. It starts now, but I'm pretty sure they screw with your hormones for another eighteen or so years after they come out. I can still get on my parents nerves and I'm well past eighteen. I think you learn where all the buttons are to press when you're in the womb," the woman blathered on, providing all the proof that Helena had chosen wisely.
"See what I mean?" Helena asked the two women at her desk. "She'll teach me everything I need to know."
"What?" Bridget asked, thinking the CEO wanted her to share her knowledge of pregnancy which was extremely limited. "What can I teach you about babies?"
And then Bridget learned why she felt like the spider's web was all around her. "Not babies, Bridget. You're going to teach me how to be….." and Irene said Helena's name on last time, hoping she would reconsider this plan. Helena brushed her off. "…. Imperfect."
"Oh, Lordy," Gloria let out because the CEO reminded her of a speeding train whisking right by Irene's attempts to slow her down.
"I'm going to teach you how to …Say what?" Bridget asked, looking around for an answer.
Helena understood that the woman may not understand where this was coming from, so she extended her some patience. "Myka's mood right now is making her less than appreciative of how I do things. In her own words, she'd like me to be….. less perfect. So, I thought who better to teach me than someone who embraces their own limitations such as yourself," she said, thinking that should satisfy everyone.
"Well, bless your heart," Bridget responded, the very Southern saying escaping her lips. The only other true Southerner in the room, Gloria, immediately got that it was not the kind expression Helena was taking it as.
"No need to thank me," Helena pointed out. "Now, let's get started," the detailed oriented woman stated.
Gloria looked at Irene because surely she was the only one who could stop this. "Helena," Irene tried again, "Won't Myka immediately notice that you're behaving more like…," and then she glanced apologetically at Bridget, "…someone else?"
"Yes!" Gloria agreed, thinking the HR Director's argument was both sound and persuasive. Unfortunately, unless Helena was making the argument, she never thought those adjectives fit.
"Well, I'm not going to be anything like her," Helena said, explaining it …again. "I'm only trying to learn what one does when they embrace their faults."
"I'mma gonna pray for you," Gloria said, getting up, and this time it was Bridget who knew what the colloquialism really meant. She fist bumped the nurse as she left.
Irene threw her hands up in the air. If Helena wouldn't listen, she would hope that Myka would be calm enough to appreciate her wife's good intentions. She followed the nurse out of the office.
"So, Helena," Bridget said, sitting down in the chair and wondering where this was going to go. "I have it on very good authority that the Central Park Conservatory Board of Directors were willing to accept half of what you offered for the building for your museum," the investment banker noted.
Helena was busy watching the woman's mannerisms, but nothing was standing out as faulty. "They're upset that I paid too much?" Helena asked.
"No! They're very happy. As your personal banker, I am upset," Bridget shared. "I've gone over the minutes of the meeting, I've talked to some of the other Directors, and I am convinced they would have accepted far less than you offered."
"They were taking too long to decide," Helena explained as to why she threw out a number finally ….a very large number.
"Well, it was a very generous offer, Helena, and while it will go to preserving the park we all love, I still would like to suggest that next time you're looking to purchase a piece of Manhattan real estate, you let me come with you," the banker extraordinaire suggested. She was convinced her negotiating skills would have saved Helena enough for two museums.
Bridget's sound business advice and admirable concern were thwarting Helena's attempts to learn from the woman. Although grateful, Helena shared that the woman was not making this easy. Bridget sat back in her chair and put the business papers aside. "So, Myka complained that you're perfect, is that what you're telling me? And you want to give Myka what you think she wants which is to be less perfect. Do I have that so far?"
Helena was every so grateful that someone understood her. "Yes!"
"And you thought, hey, if anyone can teach me how to be less than perfect, it's Bridget?" Bridget asked, saying the words slowly.
"Well, when you put it that way," Helena said, getting how they sounded because Bridget practically spelled it out.
"Helena, can we assume for a minute that I know a little something about Myka?" Bridget said and Helena countered that she rarely assumed anything because most of the time she knew.
"Like you knew how much to offer the Board for the Belvedere Castle?" the banker pointed out. She dismissed the glare from Helena; an action which both annoyed and interested the CEO. "Look, in all the times I have ever seen Myka out of sorts, or not being herself, the only thing she has ever wanted, needed and wished for ….is you," Bridget said plainly. "And not perfect you, not you pretending to be something else, just…..you."
Helena took what the woman said in and slowly considered the idea. "But that is what Irene said," Helena pointed out.
"What can I say? She's a really bright woman," Bridget said, patting both of them on the back for the sense they made.
It was a hard concept for the Brit to get. Two very different women, making the same suggestion, and making it sound like it made sense? How could that be?
"But if Myka is annoyed at what she perceives to be my perfection, should I not reduce that variable in order to change the formula and affect the outcome?" the scientist queried.
"What the hell did you just say?" Bridget asked and then offered – "Okay, let's try this - mess up your hair, break a nail. I know! Go crazy and use poor grammar!" Her voice registered the excitement of just the thought of Helena speaking slang. "I would film that," she thought out loud.
"Poor grammar?" Helena asked in full British accent, appalled at the idea.
"I know, shocking, but we imperfects do it all the time," Bridget mocked. "I got it!" Bridget practically yelled, but Helena immediately pointed out – "You have it."
"Lose a 'g' at the end of a word. Tell Myka you're gonna go home. Eh? Brilliant, right?" Bridget tried, getting caught up in her assignment.
"I cannot…," Helena said, practically shivering at the thought.
"Oh, for the love of Mike. Give it a shot," she suggested, as she gathered her papers to leave. "So, I'm going to try and renegotiate the terms of this purchase," Bridget offered, but Helena's mind was on Myka and so she waived her off and wished her luck. "I hope I was helpful in your quest to be …..less perfect," Bridget said, unable to keep the smile off her face.
"Pardon?" Helena asked, because again – she was thinking of Myka. "Oh, immensely, yes."
Bridget laughed and shook her head. 'I can't wait to hear Myka's version of this fiasco,' she thought to herself. She thanked Helena and left, unable to stop at Myka's office because she had another meeting to run to.
Within minutes of the banker's departure, Helena was on her way to Myka's office. She had decided which flaws to incorporate. Helena approached Myka's office and stopped. She put her hands in her hair to tussle it. Millie sat at her desk, staring at the woman. "What else?" Helena said out loud and turned to Millie. For as long as the secretary had worked there, she had never seen one hair on her boss' head out of place.
"What…are you …doing?" Millie couldn't help but ask.
Helena grabbed the scissors from the woman's desk and proceeded to cut one of her perfectly manicured fingernails over the wastepaper basket.
"Are you okay?" Millie asked of the strange behavior.
"Yes, thank you," Helena answered and stood there, looking down at herself to see what else she could do. "If you would be so kind as to put a run in my stocking," she asked Millie, thinking that would be the piece de resistance of her efforts.
Millie looked up at the woman who was handing her the scissors. "You want me…to put…a hole…?" she asked cautiously and took them.
"Just a small one, there," Helena instructed as she turned around and provided the back of her leg. Millie slowly reached down and pulled on the nylon material and cut the tiniest section. The material immediately separated and Helena pulled at it to make it appear up and down her leg. "There!" she said, proud of the result. "Would you tell Myka I am here," Helena asked and went back to the office door, pulling her blouse out of her form fitting skirt in the back.
"I'll tell her someone who looks like you is here," Millie said and announced the visitor. She then watched as the CEO disappeared behind the door. Millie immediately messaged the internal group of those in the know to ask what was going on, but no one had any information. If they didn't know, it couldn't be good, Millie decided.
"Hello….," and Helena heard her usual warm greeting and changed it to …"Hey." Not her usual "Hey, you," that Myka created, but just ….Hey.
"Hi, sweetie," Myka said, looking up from her paperwork, happy to see her wife. Much calmer since her outburst, she was glad Helena was there so she could apologize.
And then Myka saw the state her wife was in. Helena stood there, as if trying to show Myka something. "Oh my God, are you okay?" Myka said, jumping up from her seat and quickly approaching Helena. She grabbed her forearms and pulled them out to try and find out where she had been hurt. "Who did this to you?" Myka demanded, ready to pounce on the bastard that touched her wife. "Did you fall?"
"Fall? No," Helena stated, giving Myka a minute to get what imperfection looked like on her wife.
"I will rip them…," Myka said, waiting to find out who did it, but still looking at Helena. "They…touched…your …..hair? she yelled horrified.
Helena was not only on a different page, she was in an entirely different book. "Do you like it?" she asked -proud of her ability to do messy.
"Do I? No, I don't like it! Are you okay?" Myka asked, pulling Helena to the couch and making her sit down. When Helena sat, she purposely crossed her long legs so Myka could see the damage to her stocking. "Did someone touch you?" Myka yelled and finally Helena caught on to the anger in Myka's voice.
"What? No, darling, no one touched me. I did this," Helena said again - proud of her imperfections.
Myka pulled back and looked at Helena. She looked as if she had a run in with a revolving door…and lost. "What the hell did you do?"
"I ….," Helena said, shaking her hands back and forth by her head, "And…..," she continued to explain as she pulled at her blouse, "Oh…and look! A tear," she said, showing the length of the run in her stocking.
"You? Did this? Why…?" Myka asked, her face all scrunched up in a quizzical expression.
"To help you, Darling. I mean, Dar…lin'," Helena said, emphatically, smiling that she could in fact, speak poorly. "Although I cannot take all the credit. Bridget suggested some of these things," Helena said, giving credit to the friend.
"Bridget ….told you to put a run in your stocking?" Myka asked, the quizzical expression still on her face.
"Oh no," Helena said, thinking that was the most outstanding example. "I thought of that all by myself. Bridget suggested messing my hair and using poor grammar," she explained. "And look!" Helena said, putting her five fingers straight in the air to show the damage.
"Am I the only sane person left?" Myka asked, shaking her head. "Why would you do …any…of this?"
"Why?" Helena asked, truly surprised she was going to have to explain this. "Well, because in spite of the fact that technically you're quite sane, your erratic moods have manifested themselves in questionable desires. So when you complained that I was, in your words…," Helena was careful to point out, "….perfect, I thought I could become less…..perfect," Helena explained patiently. "Because …that's…what you wanted."
Now, Myka should have heard how her wife was so willing to help, that she went out of her way to undo what she thought Myka was having trouble with. But - what Myka heard instead was –
"Questionable desires?" she asked slowly.
"Pardon? Oh, not really the point," Helena said, but found herself being pulled up by the hand and swept out through the door. "Where….?" She attempted to ask Myka, who didn't stop until she was outside Irene's office door. She opened it wide and pulled Helena inside.
"I will call you right back," Irene said to the caller. "Something just came… in." Irene was not surprised that Helena's efforts backfired, but she was very surprised that Myka wasn't appreciating her wife's efforts.
"Here," Myka said handing Helena over, "You want to protect her? Now would be a good time."
Irene stared at something she rarely ever saw – a disheveled Helena. Myka turned on her heels and shut the door and ….immediately…..regretted it. What had she done? She knew Helena was doing this for her, that she would do anything for her and how did she repay her kindness? She immediately turned back and opened the door. Helena was still stunned, but Irene's expression said it all – Myka had behaved terribly and she knew it!
"I …am….so …..sorry," Myka said, rushing to Helena and taking her hands to her face. "Please, Helena, please forgive me." Tears rolled freely down her face and touched Helena's hands.
The last few minutes moved so fast for Helena, that she was still trying to wrap her head around what happened. "Myka, of course, there is nothing to forgive," Helena said, and pulled Myka into a warm hug.
"No, there is!" Myka insisted and Helena looked over Myka's shoulder at Irene as if to say – "Is there?" and Irene nodded. She knew Myka was aware of her erratic behavior and would want Helena to forgive her, not dismiss it.
And then Helena offered Myka something that was even more special than pretending to be like everyone else.
"Myka," Helena said, pulling Myka onto the couch so she could face her, "I know it was a long time ago, but I went through something very similar when I was having Christina. Circumstances were very different, of course, but I, too, felt as if someone had high jacked my emotions. Truth be told, it was a little more difficult to tell with me," Helena said, a twinkle in her eye because her family always accused her of wild mood swings. "But I think I do know what you're going through and only hoped to relieve some of the things that agitated you …."
Irene watched as Myka lunged at Helena, pulling her in and kissing her passionately. " I am so sorry, Helena. God, I love you, " Irene heard Myka said as she left the room and quietly closed the door behind her.
"And I love you, Myka," Helena said and was once again, pinned back with the delicious sensation of full lips pressing on hers.
"I never, ever want you to change, Helena. I'm feeling …insecure and moody, but please, Helena, bear with me. It will pass," Myka promised, assured by Gloria that it was temporary.
"Oh, Darling, I have never seen you look more beautiful," Helena said sincerely, holding Myka in the most adoring gaze. Myka could feel the warmth of Helena's love radiate inside her.
Helena was the anchor to Myka's changeable mood swings. "Helena, I can't guarantee that this emotional roller coaster ride will disappear soon, but the one thing that will never change is how perfect you are to me," Myka said lovingly. "Please don't ever change."
"I promise," Helena said, grateful she could give up the charade.
Irene sat down on the couch outside her office in the waiting area, feeling very much like she had a first row seat on the Bering-Wells roller coaster. "I hope I make it to this birth," she said to no one in particular.
When the couple were both assured everything was okay, Myka made Helena stand up. She gently pushed her fingers through Helena's hair and the locks returned to their natural position – perfectly. Then she helped Helena put her blouse back in her skirt and suggest changing her stockings when she got back to her office. "That was really hard," Helena sheepishly admitted of the disheveled look. Myka knew with all her heart that it was indeed for the Brit.
They emerged from the office, holding hands and laughing. Helena stared at Irene sitting on the couch as if she had caught her goofing off. "Well, you'll be happy to know, Irene, that I will not be changing," Helena said, looking at Myka and kissing her once again.
"That is the first thing that you have said all day that makes sense," Irene said, getting up and walking back into her vacated office and closing the door.
"She can be so moody sometimes," Helena noted to Myka as they walked back to her office. Millie watched as the couple kissed lovingly until the elevator arrived to take Helena back upstairs.
"All okay in Camelot," the secretary messaged the group.
While calm had returned to the 16th floor, things were starting to unhinge on the floor above them. As Helena emerged from the elevator, Eileen was about to get on.
"That's it!" Eileen yelled when Helena asked if she was okay. "The wedding is off!"