Yep, after a long wait, there is finally an update for this story. I went for vacation for a week, spending quite a bit of time in the car for the trip, and somehow managed to write up another chapter or so for this story when I wasn't fishing, visiting relatives, shopping for knickknacks, or playing random games.
So now that Lilo has been abducted by aliens, the ohana has to be informed. That's not going to be fun for anyone. But that's kind of an important step in the whole rescue process: telling people they need to perform a rescue. On the other hand, it gives me the opportunity to flesh out some more of the characters. And that's always fun for me to do.
Remember, the Swarm is mine (though they can be borrowed with permission if you like them). The rest is Disney, who will one day take over the world and it shall indeed be a small world after all.
And non-English languages that are translated shall be represented by having those sections written in italics. It should be obvious when that happens, but I just wanted you to know. Enjoy!
"My evil creation better to be having good reason to be making all this noise," muttered Jumba, watching several confused experiments wandering into the front yard. "If it's false alarm, I blame you."
"Hey, just because I named Yaarp and he likes me best doesn't make him any less your responsibility," Pleakley countered. "You created all those little monsters. Besides, Yaarp's too smart and sweet to start setting off false warnings."
"So you are to be preferring aggressive alien invasion of primitive and nearly defenseless planet?"
The Plorgonarian was silent for a moment before chuckling nevously, "I'm sure he could make a mistake. Or maybe he's learned about practical jokes."
He rolled his eyes at his companion. And considering that Kweltikwans tended to have four eyes, the action left a very clear impression of his annoyance with Pleakley.
If someone had told the evil genius he would someday be roommates with the noodle-y one-eyed Plorgonarian the Grand Councilwoman visited his prison cell with, Jumba would have laughed. Of course, if someone also told him back in Evil Genius University that his partner, Dr. Jacques von Hamsterviel, would betray him to the Galactic Federation, his greatest creation would become the willing playmate to a child of a technologically-limited planet, his evil programming of six hundred twenty five living experiments would be easily corrupted to the point of harmlessness to the indigenous species, and that one day he would live on a world with laughably-backwards technology that could barely carry their people to their moon and that he would continue to live there even when offered the chance to regain his lab at Galaxy Defense Industries... well, he would certainly want to scan the brain of anyone who told him all that.
Even his genius intellect couldn't calculate the odds of how he'd ended up living happily as the roommate of the supposed "Earth expert" Plorgonarian and helping Nani raise her sister. There were simply too many statistically-improbable events that led to the final result. Not to mention the little girl who practically defied any prediction Jumba might make, especially when it came to finding her way into the hearts of evil genetic mutant experiments and evil geniuses alike.
Jumba was once married. He had parents that he respected and a few siblings both younger and older than him. He might even have a couple of grandparents left. There were people on Kweltikwan he shared genetics with and who he once shared a legal contract with that defined them as spouses. They were also individuals who didn't care about him, would betray him or lie to him without hesitation, or might even actively berate and insult him. In fact, his ex-wife would likely pluck out three of his eyes on a bad day. In summary, he had relatives. But he didn't have family.
At least, he didn't have family until a certain little human child decided to swallow him up into her ever-growing ohana. It changed things, having Lilo declare you family. And not just big changes, like Stitch and the others growing beyond their programming to a degree he could have never dreamed. There were tiny, gradual, powerful changes that were nearly invisible and unnoticeable until much later.
The change from solitary evil genius who would love nothing more than to create the perfect biological weapon of destruction as the ultimate display of brilliance to the genius with a family who cared about him just as he did them in return and one entire island covered by the appreciated and admired results of his life's work... he couldn't calculate the exact moment it happened, but it somehow led to him being happy on the primitive planet, being the "uncle" of the improvised ohana, and having his creations act like true living beings with individual desires and choices rather than the simple constructed weapons he originally envisioned. The changes caused by having a real family were the reason was now dealing with a concerned Pleakley wondering if Experiment 613 made a mistake or if there was truly an extraterrestrial threat.
As the large, stocky figure moved through the growing crowd of experiments, Jumba took a mental note of which of his creations were present. Experiment 523, the icy small one with icicle spikes on his head, was pacing next to the shorter red Experiment 619. One of Jumba's greatest regrets in the last few years was the lack of recorded footage of their elemental battle before Splodyhead's conversion to good. The low-built shape of Experiment 513 with his flat tail was waiting patiently next to the stairs. Experiment 221, obviously trusting that the lighthouse would survive without him long enough to investigate the emergency, was zipping back and forth as electricity all around the yard. And since 626 wasn't present, the pink-furred figure of Experiment 624 was apparently taking on the job of leadership and moving around to keep the new arrivals calm. But even with all of them talking among each other, none of the experiments seemed to know what Yaarp's alarm was about.
"Jumba!" shouted Stitch as he burst out of the undergrowth. "Maka maka. Lilo. Kaphong. Saari isa impodement."
"Slow down and try Standard. Or English. Or whatever they call it on this planet," Pleakley said.
The blue figure didn't even react to the Plorgonarian's words. He kept running towards his creator in a clear desperate panic. Jumba frowned. He couldn't be certain, but it almost looked like the experiment didn't even understand the one-eyed extraterrestrial's words. While it was theoretically possible for the language centers in the experiment's mind to be overloaded enough to cause a temporary failure, it would require extreme mental and emotional distress. All that would be left would be the default primary language of Tantalog. And the scientist didn't want to consider how bad it would have to be for 626 to cause that result, but the few words he'd managed to hear through the frantic pleas didn't bode well.
Feeling a little rusty actually speaking his native language rather than merely translating it, Jumba carefully said, "Slow down, 626. What happened to upset you this much? What did you say about Little Girl being captured?"
"She's gone," he answered, coming to a stop directly in front of the scientist. Ears flat, Stitch continued frantically, "They took her. How could they? I tried to save her, I promise. I did. We have to get her. We have to save her. I let her down. I failed her. I couldn't protect her. Why couldn't I get to her in time? I'm sorry. I'm just an idiotic failure of an experiment."
"626, please calm down. This isn't helping," his creator urged, starting to realize what could send the indestructible creature into this state and he wasn't happy about what he was hearing in the slightest. "Take a deep breath and explain what happened. I can't help if I don't know enough."
The blue experiment followed the instructions, trying to calm the swirling storm of emotions that Jumba could see in those black eyes. There was fear, guilt, dread, frustration, worry, fury, desperation, and hopelessness all tangled up. And it made it too easy for Jumba to lose his usual detached scientist stance with his creation and regain the mindset of a worried parent with an upset child: a role he was less comfortable and experienced with, but equally true to who he was in regards to Stitch.
"We were coming back from the beach. We were racing and I was ahead. We were just playing; she should have been safe. But someone grabbed her."
"Who?"
"Monsters. Monstrous aliens who took her to their spaceship and escaped. I tried to stop them, to get her back. I tried. But I failed her. I couldn't catch up in time."
"Uh, any of you want to fill me in anytime soon?" requested Pleakley, obviously confused while the other present experiments were starting to look at each other worriedly. The Plorgonarian reminded, "In case you forgot, I didn't take Tantalog as a second language in college."
Jumba ignored his roommate's words and said, "What species of aliens?"
"I... I don't know."
The scientist frowned. His creation would recognize any member of the Galactic Federation. He made sure of that. Of course, no member of the alliance would kidnap Earth's ambassador either. That meant the culprit was someone outside the Federation, which could complicate things.
"Describe them, 626."
"Using local units of measure, they were approximately six feet tall, insectoid, a deep orange shade with no obvious markings, two wide-spread and large eyes, and fast through rough terrain," he reported. "I didn't get the best look, but they superficially resembled the native insect, the praying mantis."
Of course his fast-working brain managed to collect a reasonable description and relay it in a clinical fashion. It was the type of intelligence-gathering behavior he'd wanted the experiment to be capable of in order to maximize his destructive capabilities. Jumba just wished the description was different. The day just kept getting worse. True, he had a few ideas of how to proceed. But it still wasn't going to be easy to handle, even for a genius.
"Someone tell me what's going on now or else I'll never bake another upside-down pineapple cake from Carla's new cooking show again," Pleakley threatened. "I don't like being left in the dark."
"Fine," Jumba said shortly. "Little Girl has been captured by what are probably Entolyterians and taken off the planet. Better?"
Ignoring the resulting panic attack from the Plorgonarian at the news, the scientist focused back on a very miserable Stitch. This wasn't good. As terrifying as it was to nearly lose his experiment due to insufficiently-charged molecules, it did serve the important purpose of warning Jumba not to forget that all the previous programming, adjustments, and mistakes were still there. No matter how different 626 seemed now, he was still the same little monstrosity he created. Underneath the fluffy exterior, the destructive programming still remained active and simply held in check by the gift of free will and the unwavering love for the kind-hearted human girl. Evidence could still be seen in the broken furniture left behind when his temper flared, when impulse won out over rational thought. Anger and destructive programming were rarely a good mix. And now there was no Little Girl to rein him in and Stitch had more than enough reason to be angry...
He could see the experiment opening and closing his clawed fists, his instincts obviously urging him to destroy. He wanted to destroy the problem, to lash out at the source of what was hurting him. Jumba didn't know if Stitch even realized he was making the gesture. And even if the scientist once intended his creature to be evil and chaotic, he no longer wanted Stitch to do something he'd truly consider monstrous afterwards.
Jumba wasn't good at this. If he was, maybe he'd still be married. Or more likely, he would have been wise enough to avoid that disastrous marriage in the first place. Jumba wasn't good at emotions. They were twisty, tangled, complicated things that were somehow harder to understand than any science. Calming and comforting one of his precious experiments was something far safer to leave to Lilo. But she wasn't here. She couldn't help the worried, frightened, angry, guilt-ridden experiment. And this wasn't the job for a scientist.
But it was the job for a parent. Even one who rarely acknowledged or felt confident in that role.
"Stitch," he said, choosing to use the Standard name Lilo gave the experiment rather than use a number or a Tantalog equivalent of the simple word. "This is not your fault. You aren't perfect. As good as I am as an evil genius, I didn't create you to be flawless and limitless. If you insist on dwelling on your short-comings, you must give me equal blame for not designing you better. But it is far smarter to focus on fixing the situation."
Switching to Standard for a moment, he ordered the female experiment, "624, inform and organize other experiments. We are to be preparing a rescue."
She only hesitated a moment, giving Stitch a quick hug that he certainly needed before charging back towards the others. Jumba wished that 626 could have responded a little more to her gesture of affection and sympathy, but the current situation was obviously too distracting for that.
The scientist continued, "I know you are upset. I know you think you failed her. But I also know that she won't give up on you. Lilo believes in you. She has always believed that you are unstoppable, irreplaceable, loyal, and good. Even when evidence says otherwise, she believes in you and she's never been wrong. It doesn't take an evil genius to realize that Little Girl will be right again. You haven't failed her yet. As long as you don't give up, we'll find a way to help her."
"I know we'll save her. We have to. We have to get her back. Lilo is... everything," stated Stitch, the frustration and anger with the situation briefly fading way to leave only sorrow and fear behind. "I'm sorry, Jumba. I don't want to give up on her, but I'm... drowning. I'm drowning and lost and I can't stop thinking about Lilo being gone. I'm scared of never finding her or not finding her before something bad happens to her. I don't like being scared and I don't know how to stop. And I'm sorry, but I want to destroy everything connected to the ones who took her. I want to destroy them more than any large city, but I don't like those thoughts either. I'm good. I'm good, but the idea of never finding her hurts and I want to hurt them for taking her away. And I'm not sure I can make those ideas go away and I'm sorry and scared to go back to how I used to be before I met her. I just want everything to go back to how it was this morning. I'm sorry I failed and messed everything up."
The Kweltikwan knelt down in front of him and briefly closed his eyes. Listening to the young and worried experiment trying to voice the current struggles with his destructive instincts, Jumba felt a pang of guilt for his decision to give the living creature such strong programming to only cause harm. He designed 626 to be unstoppable and unwavering in his destructive desires. He never stopped to consider what effect his actions would have if his evil creation ever desired to be good.
"Everything will be all right, 626. I promise. We will find Lilo, safe and sound. She survived you and you were the perfect weapon. Little Girl will be fine. Just focus on that. We all love her and we'll make sure she gets a proper rescue." Switching once more to Standard, Jumba said, "Remember, Little Girl is ohana. No one left behind or forgotten."
Stitch nodded slowly, still apologizing in Tantalog. It didn't take a genius to realize that an especially quick rescue was important. For both Lilo and the experiment.
Once the initial panic about being kidnapped began to pass and she accepted the fact that she was disappearing into space, Lilo began take in her situation with a clearer head. It was bad, but it could be worse. After all, Gantu and Hamsterviel once kidnapped Jumba like this and they got him back. As long as no one gave up, they could still find a way. It might take a little time though. She would have to be patient. And when she started to feel any doubt, she would just have to remind herself: what would Elvis do?
With her courage and confidence freshly bolstered by her mental pep talk, Lilo studied her surroundings. Alien decor was something she'd grown familiar with. The design of her prison was different than those she'd been locked inside in the past. Rather than an entire wall being constructed of a clear durable material, there was a round door/viewing port with the rest of the surfaces being smooth metal. Outside her cell were a few computer consoles, but no chairs. Apparently her captors didn't sit down much.
As for her captors, there were three of them. They were orange praying mantises. Lilo couldn't think of a better description. They had triangle heads, huge bug eyes, long antennas, a beak-like mouth instead of the clicking mandibles she originally expected, a hard exoskeleton, a thorax and abdomen, and six legs. Well, two legs and four arms. The top set of arms were large, folded pinchers like a real praying mantis. The lower set were smaller and shorter, ending in three flexible fingers. Those limbs were working the computer systems and running the ship. And the bug people were just about a head taller than Nani, not including the antennas. Honestly, these aliens would be awesome in the next Wasp Mummy movie.
"Hey," she yelled at her captors, bracing her hands on her hips. "As the appointed ambassador for Earth, selected by the Grand Councilwoman herself, you better take me home right now or else you'll be huge trouble. I mean it. But if you turn this spaceship around right now, maybe they'll go easy on you."
"Silence," one of the orange aliens ordered, not even looking at the girl.
Lilo crossed her arms and scowled. She knew it probably wouldn't work, but she had to try. Even if Cobra Bubbles was right about many aliens being extremely concerned about rules and protocol, Lilo knew she tended to run into those who preferred to break them. Not just Hamsterviel either. Jumba was in trouble when he first joined the ohana because the cousins were illegal experiments. So she wasn't that surprised that these aliens didn't care about kidnapping an ambassador.
"Fine," she grumbled. "Just don't blame me when the rescue party shows up." She tugged at the swimming suit under her dress for a moment, trying to shake some of the drying sand loose, before asking, "Who are you guys anyway? What do you want?"
"We are the Swarm," the insectoid alien answered, the same one who spoke before and the one who grabbed Lilo in the first place. "We are Entolyterians. Queen Soltus ordered us to bring you to Entolytera and so we shall."
"What does she want?" asked Lilo. "I mean, if she wanted a favor or something, she could have asked. But if she's planning to lay some eggs in my head or something, I'll have to say no."
This time, the giant praying mantis did look at her. The girl possessed plenty of experience judging facial expressions on non-human faces, so she could recognize the look of disgust the suggestion caused. Lilo shrugged. They were big bugs. Laying eggs in people's heads was the kind of thing that happened. She used to pretend that sort of thing happened to Scrump all the time. And while it was cool to see that happen on TV, Lilo didn't want it to happen to her.
"We lowly Oranges would not dare to question Queen Soltus' wisdom or to speculate upon her desires, so we do not know what she intends for you," said the insectoid creature carefully. "However, the scenario you described is unlikely."
"So no eggs in my head. Got it," she nodded. "So what's your names?"
"Names?"
"Yeah, your names. People trying to capture me usually tell me their names eventually," the girl said. "It's polite and Nani always tells me to work on my manners." Adopting a grin on her face and acting like she wasn't a prisoner on a spaceship hurtling further away from her home with each passing moment, she waved, "Aloha. My name is Lilo Pelekai, but you can call me Lilo."
"The Swarm does not require names for individual members, human. There is no more point in giving a name to one member than there is in naming a single cell in your body. Each rank consists of interchangeable members. They are defined by their duty and service to Queen Soltus, not by singular members. Each Orange is a warrior, a guard, and a soldier. Each Yellow is a strategist and a weapon designer. Each Green is a weapon builder and factory worker. Each Brown is a trainer of the captured conscripts from conquered worlds and a caretaker of the young. And each lowly and worthless Blue performs menial tasks and maintenance. Our role within the Swarm is defined from the moment we hatch. We are efficient, strong, and powerful. The whole of the Swarm matters, not the single life of one Entolyterian. That is why we stand victorious while other worlds fall. There is no need for individual names, to celebrate one lowly member, when the entirety of the mighty Swarm is what truly matters."
Lilo didn't even blink in response to the passionate speech on the superior methods of the alien insects. After dozens of Jumba's "evil genius creations" speeches, she could easily separate the key information from the bragging.
"So you don't have names, you come in a lot of colors, and your jobs are based on colors," she summarized. "Not a lot of respect for individuality here. But what about the Queen Soltus person? She has a name."
"She is bestowed a name because she is the only one who is irreplaceable," another giant praying mantis, a male, stated firmly. "Now be silent, human."
"Well, I also have a name and I want you to call me Lilo," the girl said. "And I think the rest of you not having names is just silly. I can't say 'hey, you' all the time. You need a name. And it just so happens that I'm an expert at giving aliens names."
The most talkative member of the swarm rolled her oversized eyes, "If you agree to stop speaking the rest of the journey and cease these questions, you may choose a name to use for me if the lack of one disturbs you so greatly."
"Deal," Lilo nodded, grinning as she fell back on a familiar activity. "Let's see. You're a girl alien and you look like a giant bug. You kidnapped me, but only because your queen told you to. You're fast, orange, and you said the bug people who are your color are fighters. So a tough, strong name would be good. Like Helga or Pele. But you need something different. You need a name that wouldn't belong to just any giant, orange, alien, praying mantis person. I could call you Chatty because you talk more than your friends. Or maybe Gabby. Oh, Grabby would work since you have those cool folded pincher-claw things you used to grab me."
She pulled her arms close to her body while bending her hands down to demonstrate. The impression wasn't exactly perfect, but Lilo felt it was close enough.
"Was this not supposed to silence the human?" remarked the third alien, another female.
"Be patient," said Lilo. "I've already used up over six hundred and twenty good names for the experiments. Thinking of new ones starts getting tricky. And she needs a special one. She's the first alien I've named who isn't a cousin. I want to do it right."
The girl crossed her arms and frowned thoughtfully. It was true that she wanted to pick the perfect name. But she also wanted to keep herself distracted and busy. As long as she was asking questions and thinking about names, any doubts about getting home and seeing her ohana could be kept at bay. They saved Jumba. She'd even managed to fly into space with Reuben for a rescue in the middle of the Leroy fiasco. Someone would save her. Rescues were what they did. Until then, she would keep herself busy.
"You need a name that no one else would ever give an orange bug-lady alien," Lilo continued. "Something unique and awesome. But also something pretty." She tugged at her floral dress again, the salt left on her skin from the drying sea water causing her to itch slightly, before inspiration struck abruptly. "I've got it. I could give you a normal, common name, but that would be boring. I could give you an alien-sounding name, but that would be predictable. I could give you a name like the ones I give the cousins, but something descriptive won't work if all the bug people are supposed to be almost the same. So I'll give you a name that no one would expect, the kind you would only hear in Hawaii and definitely not in space. I'm going to call you Pua. In Hawaiian, it means 'flower.' And while there are lots of flowers on the islands and even if some are pretty much the same colors as other flowers, they're still different and special. Plus, some of the flowers are the same shade of orange as you."
The large praying mantis, Pua, tilted her head, "Interesting logic. If you are satisfied with that decision, then you may use that designation for the duration of your time with the Swarm."
"Perhaps now the human will stop talking," muttered the third alien, once more refusing to use the girl's name.
"Yep, a deal's a deal," Lilo stated, feeling slightly vindictive. "No more talking for me."
Silence fell upon the spaceship. For about thirty seconds, she let her kidnappers believe they would get their requested quiet trip. Then the girl sprang on her loophole.
"You ain't nothin' but a hound dog," she sang at full volume, introducing yet another sadly-deprived species to the wonders of The King.
Nani would be the first to admit that her life didn't turn out the way she pictured. True, there were plenty of people in the world who didn't end up with their dream futures. But the young woman felt confident that none of their surprises could compare to hers.
She never expected to lose her parents and be left in charge of her little sister. She loved Lilo even though she was over a decade younger, but Nani hadn't been prepared to be thrown head first into guardianship. Finding the correct balance between sibling and parent wasn't easy and she still struggled sometimes to find the proper way to fulfill her role. All her life plans were tossed aside so she could keep her remaining family safe and sound. And as hard as it was, Nani didn't regret her actions for a second.
The bigger surprise to her life, one that she knew to be difficult to beat, was when a living bio-weapon crashed into their lives and Lilo decided he was staying. Nani was forced to accept the existence of aliens and that over half her family members now consisted of extraterrestrials. While Lilo believed in almost anything, the young woman never believed in life on other planets. Now her home appeared to hold the cast of a decent sci-fi movie. And while it was easier in some ways since Jumba, Pleakley, and Stitch helped with Lilo, they also brought their own forms of chaos and surprises to life.
Pleakley, for example, wasn't quite the Earth expert he believed himself to be. Nani couldn't even count the times he misunderstood a tradition or social convention. Not to mention his fascination with the way canned dog food produced its own gravy. But he was surprisingly skilled with a sewing machine, loved cleaning more than she could believe, and could recreate some interesting meals from television shows with a little supervision. And he wasn't stealing her clothes as much anymore.
Based on her times with Jumba in the household, Nani could understand why he had an ex-wife. Between the evil laugh and his obsession with "evil" creations, there were certain issues with having a resident evil genius who was only mostly reformed. Granted, he wasn't that evil. Mostly he just didn't like his creativity being hampered by rules, normal biology, or the laws of physics. It didn't take long for the young woman to restrict his mad science tendencies to his spaceship, but it was still nice having someone who could fix "primitive" appliances. And she adapted to having household objects vanishing for his projects.
Adapting to Stitch, though, was a particularly unique challenge. Jumba and Pleakley could be considered quirky uncles (or an uncle and aunt, considering Pleakley's usual disguise). It was easy enough to think of them that way. Stitch was like a little kid combined with a dog, a wolverine, and a tornado. Broken furniture and footprints on the ceiling were just the start. He was both curious and smart: the same combination of traits that Lilo possessed that propelled her into trouble on a regular basis. And the blue-furred experiment was strong and tough enough to cause serious trouble.
Furthermore, there were times she wished Jumba didn't give his creation such sensitive senses. She could remember about two weeks after Stitch's arrival when the curious alien started following her around with a small frown. When she finally asked what he wanted, Stitch told her in fragmented English that she smelled different than before. It took her several moments to make the connection between his innocent question and her memories of her science class talking about biology, hormones, and pheromones, but she started blushing the instant she figured it out. And while she contemplated letting Jumba handle it, she couldn't decide if it would be worse if the evil genius was ignorant of human biology and would ask for a lesson himself or if he somehow possessed an in-depth knowledge of the topic that he would be happy to share with the entire household. So she forced herself to take care of it herself.
The strangest twist to her life, out of all the weird things she'd encountered or dealt with, was the fact that Nani found herself giving an alien genetic experiment an abbreviated version of The Talk. She didn't bother with too many details (considering the fact Jumba essentially grew Stitch in an oversized test tube, she didn't know how relevant it might be). She mostly told him that older human girls smelled different once a month for a while. She told him that she might also be angrier than normal once a month for the same reason. And she told him that it would happen to Lilo someday when she was older and that it wasn't something to worry about. It just meant she was growing up and maturing. Finally, Nani told Stitch that her six year old sister didn't need to hear about any of it until she was a little older. It was officially the most surreal moment in her entire life, something that no one could have prepared her for.
So her life didn't turn out like she predicted. It was strange and chaotic. There were days where the sheer craziness made her want to scream and pull her hair out. But that's how it was sometimes in a family. And even on her worst days, she loved her weird family. It was the oddest ohana ever and it was hers. Lilo, Stitch, Jumba, Pleakley, David, and even the hundreds of cousin experiments...
And because of exactly how abnormal her life truly was, Nani knew what the alien invasion alarm sounded like. Normal people didn't need or possess that knowledge. The tourists and even several locals thought the blaring sound was some type of tsunami warning. Her life wasn't normal, so the young woman recognized Yaarp's voice. While others watched the ocean for danger, Nani knew the danger was from a different source. And she could already feel dread forming in the pit of her stomach as she ran home.
Lilo was involved. There wasn't a single doubt in her mind. Her sister was like an alien trouble magnet. If she didn't know that Stitch would do anything to protect Lilo, Nani knew she would have died from stress already. But even when Gantu was stomping around the island and that Hamsterviel guy brought a clone army of experiments (and her life was definitely strange when she was forced to use a phrase like that), Yaarp never sounded the alarm. Usually she never even heard about the extraterrestrial problems until after they were solved. This time, the young woman could feel something was wrong.
Her first glimpse of the house did nothing to banish that sense of dread. Dozens of worried experiments were standing around the property. Pleakley, wearing one of his floral dresses, was running around the yard in a panic and shrieking. Nani spotted a pink figure, Angel, darting around in an apparent attempt to restore order. In the center of the group was Jumba. The four-eyed alien was knelt down to Stitch's level, talking to him in what was obviously meant to be a comforting manner.
That scared her. Jumba was a nice enough person, but he usually treated his various experiments with the pride of a scientist. He liked his creations and thought they were wonderful accomplishments of his genius. But it was rare that he acted like what he truly was to Stitch and the others: their father. He might have intended for them to be living weapons designed for destruction, but she knew he'd grown more attached to them than he had planned. The mad scientist couldn't hide his heart completely, but he didn't usually go out of his way to behave like a parent. The last time she could remember him doing so, it was back when Stitch nearly died because of some glitch in his creation. When Jumba started acting parental to his creations, it meant things were truly serious.
And as bad as it might be that Jumba was acting fatherly towards his prize creation and as bad as it might be that Stitch was hunched over, ears flat, and fists so tight that the claws would have pierced through the skin of a less invulnerable creature, it wasn't the worst part. It was the fact that she couldn't see her sister.
The experiments got out of the young woman's path as she charged forward. The cousins knew better than to get in her way. As she got closer, she could hear the small blue figure muttering in his native tongue, his tone both angry and scared. The only word Nani recognized for certain was "saka." He was apologizing.
She could have asked what happened. She could have asked what Yaarp's warning was about. She could have asked what was wrong, why Stitch was apologizing, or any of the other hundred questions racing through her mind. But there was only one question that she needed answered immediately. It was the same question she asked when she realized there were real aliens on the island years ago.
"Where's Lilo?"
Jumba flinched in surprise at her arrival, Pleakley stopped shrieking in panic, but Stitch was the one to speak. Unfortunately, it wasn't in English and it was far too fast for her limited knowledge to translate.
"Lilo kha araimi shol. Saka. Meega toobaga. Meega ika-patootie. Saka Nani. Saka Lilo..."
"Stitch, calm down," she interrupted, kneeling down to his level. The dread in her stomach was growing quickly, but she forced her tone to remain calm and level. "I can't understand you like that."
Taking a deep breath, he said in a pained voice, "Lilo... is gone."
"My hands are shaking and my knees are weak," the human girl sang at full volume. "I can't seem to stand on my own two feet."
The only male member of the retrieval party, quietly reminding himself that the queen wanted the human girl unharmed for the moment, muttered, "Are we there yet?"
The brief summary of the girl's kidnapping and the fact she was now hurtling to a distant corner of the galaxy wasn't met with tears and despair from the older girl, though there was a moment where it looked like she was going to crumble. Instead, fire burned in her eyes and Nani merely addressed the crowd of aliens and alien experiments with the determined phrase "I'm coming." Then Pleakley, in the hopes of preventing further harm, made the grave error that he fully intended to record as a warning for future visitors to the planet. He suggested that it was too dangerous for her to go into space for a rescue mission.
For the next five minutes while Jumba, Stitch, and the other experiments outlined the start of a plan, the young woman firmly (and loudly) stated that she would not be left behind when Lilo was in danger and that anyone who tried to keep her away from her sister would be cut up into little pieces, stuffed into the blender set on puree, and baked into a pie. The description was remarkable vivid and the combination of English and Hawaiian vocabulary used to explain the process in horrifying detail ensured that no one would doubt her intentions to follow through with that threat if necessary. And adding further support to her honesty in regards to her plans, the newly-arrived Fibber didn't buzz at any point. By the end of the rant, several of the experiments looked impressed and Pleakley could feel himself grow pale.
As much as he loved the fascinating aspects of Earth and the humans that called it home, there were days that he was forced to remember something important. Even if the native species was fairly underdeveloped technologically and was mostly ignorant of the universe beyond their world, they could be formidable and a little scary when properly motivated.
And Rule One when visiting Earth would have to be to never get between a protective older sister and her missing younger one. It never turned out well for those who tried. Especially when Stitch was equally set on saving the girl. Having Nani and the little blue monster agree on a plan of action led to things like chasing down Gantu's ship all around the island and between mountains. The more he thought about it, the more Pleakley worried about the idea of turning the older girl loose on the rest of the galaxy.
While Lilo took to space travel and the idea of alien life forms like she was born on a more developed planet, Nani always seemed a little slower to adapt. There was never any fear about the younger girl having trouble adjusting and fitting in among extraterrestrials on any planet. She sometimes seemed to do better when not dealing with humans. Nani, on the other hand, only seemed to deal with only what was necessary for her daily life.
But with Nani on a mission, she wouldn't worry about any form of adapting. She wouldn't try to fit in. Instead, she would probably charge straight through any obstacle. The rest of the universe would either have to help her or get out of the way. Pleakley was afraid the United Galactic Federation would never recover from this.
Still, he wasn't crazy enough to try again at convincing Nani to stay behind. He didn't want to be pureed in the blender.
Yep, everyone in the immediate ohana now knows about the kidnapping. And Lilo has calmed down enough to start acting like someone who spent the last three years facing aggressive experiments on a regular basis and stops being scared of the situation for the most part. She knows her family is coming, so she's just passing the time until they show up.
Also, I figured that Stitch and Jumba would be more articulate/have better grammar in their primary language of Tantalog. I certainly sound more coherent when speaking English than the Spanish I learned in school, after all.
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