A/N: Okay, so hopefully you're all still enjoying the story I'll be developing longer chapters as we go along, though I can't promise they'll ever be above the 4,000 word mark. I have to to say I've been really struggling writing this story. It may sound silly, but writing a story in which a school shooting occurs, and in which Finn dies, really put me off. I was deeply saddened by the news of Cory's passing, as was my girlfriend. I'd like to take this chance to pay my respects to a kind hearted man who left us far too soon.

Quinn smiled as 'I feel pretty' played on her phone. It was, of course, Rachel calling her. After yesterdays rather disastrous counseling appointment, followed by Noah's heart wrenching confession, the blonde had felt severely emotionally drained. However, after texting Rachel her simple message, the conversation rapidly snowballed to the point where they had texted for hours, until Quinn had to admit defeat and crawl into bed. Now, mere hours later, she'd awoken to the song that meant one thing and one thing only. Rachel.

Quickly sitting up and flattening down her messy bed hair (heaven knows why, it was only a phone call), the ex cheerleader grabbed her phone and answered with her polite Fabray greeting, despite knowing who was on the other end.

"Good morning, Quinn Fabray speaking. Who may I ask is calling?", she chirped, grin already plastered over her face.

"Why hello Quinn, it's Rachel Berry calling. I was calling to enquire if I may have the pleasure of your company this fine day", was the response, and the blonde could tell by the mere sound of the girls voice that she was smiling just as widely. Her heart swelled.

"And why's that, Rach?", she answered, dropping both the formal act and her body, flopping down on the bed to stare at her ceiling.

"Well, clearly I'm the brains in this partnership. Don't you remember? We've got a song assignment to do, and this time I'm not letting you just run out. We've got to perform it soon, Quinn!"

Oh.

Quinn grumbled in response.

"Quinn!", Rachel whined.

"Fine, fine! I'll be over there soon, Rachel", the blonde sighed, despite the smile on her face.

The line went dead, and Quinn rolled out of bed. She wasn't exactly unhappy to be spending time with Rachel, but the idea of singing that song again, that song that was all too close to the truth, the one that forced her to face her feelings head on, wasn't the most pleasant way she'd envisioned spending her Sunday. Still, at least she'd be with the girl who seemed to understand her better than anyone else, who had captured her spirit and mind, the girl of fleeting reserved smiles and angelically soft skin.

Something shifted inside Quinn's heart, giving her a temporary surge of courage. Surely Rachel had to feel the same way… the way she constantly found a reason to touch her, the way she smiled… it couldn't be coincidence. Even so, maybe Rachel was struggling with her feelings the same way Quinn was, and if she knew Quinn felt the same way, who knew what could happen? Luck only happened to the brave, right? With her newfound determinism, the blonde leapt over to the desk, grabbing her journal and tearing out a page. This would be great. Rachel and herself could be something great. All she had to do was fully convey her feelings on a piece of paper.

Easy.

Twenty minutes later, Quinn remained hunched over the blank lines before her, pen still poised in a tight grip. This wasn't working. Every time she thought she had the words, they just weren't right. They weren't elegant enough, sincere enough, to be read by the petite brunette. She needed something that would make Rachel feel the same.

And then the words came to her.

I never thought my happiness would depend on you.

That was before you came into my life in a way I have only read about. I've seen love portrayed in film and stories, but never felt it before. I'd never expected it to come from you; but now that it has, I can't imagine life without it. You've been my source of strength when I've never felt weaker, held me up when it became impossible to stand on my own. I guess that's what you need to know first.

I can't believe I'd never noticed it. You had the most reason to hate me out of everyone, yet it was always you that came to my rescue. Whenever I thought I was alone, lost, you were there by my side to guide me through. I want to spend the rest of my life showing you how thankful I am.

So, this is it. This is be being brave. This is me standing up and fighting for something I want, something that makes me happy and God, do you make me happy, Rachel. You've got a smile that makes the sun jealous; it warms people's hearts that much.

So you need to know that I love you in a big way. A way that makes me want to be silly with you. A way that makes me want to dance, to spin, to finger paint, to sing, to scream into an endless abyss, because that's exactly what my love for you is like.

It's strong and silly and dizzy. It's messy and loud and endless. But all you really need to know is that I love you, Rachel.

And if you'd let me, I'd like to be yours forever.

When Quinn knocked on the door, she took a moment to prepare herself. To be fair, she'd only encountered the Berry men's hospitality once, but it was definitely an experience that had left her with the knowledge that, next time, it was better to prepare ones self for an onslaught of booming voices and compliments. She could feel the envelope inside her dress pocket, the dull weight reminding her of the letter that said everything she could bring herself to say and more. Absently, she reached into the pocket, fiddling with the edges of the paper. It gave her strength, long after the initial adrenaline had dissipated, and the feel and texture of the confession bought the confidence back.

The door swung open quickly, surprising Quinn. Before her stood an incredibly beautiful Rachel Berry, bearing the smile that was reserved just for Quinn. Though the blonde would naturally argue that the girl before her possessed a natural beauty always, this was different. The sides of her hair were tied back into a thin braid, the rest of it pooling over her shoulders laid bare by the yellow sundress. Soft natural makeup highlighted her features, while sun kissed skin glowed in the afternoon sunlight. She was, in short, the most beautiful thing Quinn had ever seen.

Which perhaps explains why her jaw had literally dropped, staring unashamedly at what was surely an angel. Only the slightly awkward laughter snapped her out of it, blinking to force her eyes to focus back on Rachel, whose 'Quinn smile' had become unsure, waving a hand in front of her eyes.

"Earth to Quinn! Goodness, I'd thought I'd lost you there. Sorry about the wait, I'd forgotten my dads were out of town."

"Wait, your dads are out?" Quinn replied a little too quickly, wishing she could catch her words as they flew from her mouth. Seeing Rachel like this was throwing her off more than she'd anticipated.

The brunette's eyebrow rose even further as she stepped aside, motioning for Quinn to enter the home.

"Yes, they're out of town for a conference for a while, is that okay?"

Immediately Quinn could feel her cheeks redden, embarrassed by her carelessness. She quickly made herself comfortable, looking anywhere but to Rachel. The smaller girl hurriedly gathered some papers from a recliner, organising them noisily before clearing her throat.

"Alright, so, last time we sung a simple walk through of the song. Now we really need to work on how our voices work together and how we want to arrange it, as well as conveying our chemistry-"

"Chemistry?" Quinn shot out.

"Right, how we move together, the strength of feelings we can convey. I'd say we have quite strong chemistry naturally, but it's still something imperative to the performance."

Right.

Rachel thrust the sheet music towards Quinn, tidying up her own copy neatly. The blonde took it as a sign that they were about to start, and stood in response. The envelope in her pocket jostled, sending a shock of adrenaline throughout he body.

Scenarios played out before her eyes. Rachel scanning the letter, seeing her eyes growing bigger with every word. A faint smile etched across her face as she looks up to lock eyes with the blonde. A shy Rachel shuffling closer along the sofa, leaning forward, bringing her face closer and closer until Quinn could smell the peppermint on her breath, feel the brush of the other girl's eyelashes as her eyes flicker closed…

"Quinn, you start, remember?"

The words snapped her back to reality, her mind allowing her ears to process the fact that the music had already began. Her voice was rough as she started, but after the first few lines she found her voice, singing softly while looking at Rachel.

"The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you"

Rachel, however, seemed to be making a conscious effort not to look at Quinn. Or rather, not look at anything other than the piece of paper she clung to in her hands. She took her part, singing quickly and ahead of the music, her voice shaking noticeably.

"I'm open, you're closed

Where I follow, you'll go

I worry I won't see your face

Light up again"

The last word was barely out of her mouth before Rachel's bottom lip gave way, quivering as an earthshattering loud sob escaped her. And that was all it took before tears welled in her eyes, quickly streaming down her face as her tiny body shook fiercely, sobbing, whimpering, still clutching the piece of paper with both hands.

Quinn's body reacted on instinct, immediately closing the gap between them to embrace Rachel in a hug. One arm wrapped itself around the smaller girls waist, bringing her body tightly against her own, while the other gently combed through dark brown locks. Quinn soothingly hummed, the occasional 'shhh, it's okay' whispered among them, as Rachel rested her head against the taller girl's chest. And so they stayed, clinging to each other as they rode out the hard sobs, the blonde casting a spell over them with whispered promises and calming hymns.

After a while, once the heavy breaths and body shaking had subsided, Quinn gently untangled herself from the distressed girl, leading her over to the sofa. Rachel collapsed into her, resting her head on the blonde's shoulder, unwilling or unable to let go of the other girl's hand. Silence blanketed them, the brunette's sniffles the only audible sound throughout the entire house. Then-

"How am I supposed to love someone when they can't love me back?"

Quinn's heart skipped a beat.

"W-what?"

"How…" Rachel started, tears springing to her eyes once again.

"How am I supposed to get up every day, knowing he's not here? I loved him, and now he's gone, and I love him so much and it d-doesn't mean a-a-anything a-anymore…"

And Rachel was back bawling, burying her face into the crook of Quinn's neck.

And Quinn had never in her life felt more disgusted with herself. Her heart sank, but she couldn't allow herself to feel the disappointment above the bitterness in the back of her throat. She felt physically ill.

"I love him so much," Rachel whispered.

"I love him so, so much. And I thought I was okay, but I'm not. I can't sing without him. I can't be happy without him, because it's not fair. It's not fair that he will never get to feel anything anymore. There are these few seconds in the morning when I wake up, thinking I'm going to see him, and then it hits me. And it doesn't stop, it doesn't."

"It hurts," Rachel whispered, her voice laced with pain.

"It hurts," Quinn replied, grasping the girls hand tightly and pulling her closer.

Because if Quinn was to be honest, she was hurting too.

Because nothing had ever felt as heavy as the letter that sat in her dress pocket.