Later that night, I sat front row like I said I would at the house show. John was main eventing against Big Show in an iron man cage match. Every time Show threw John against the cage, I flinched. It's a habit after years of watching your father, then later your boyfriend.

As I watched, the open seat next to me was taken by some guy. When he rolled up his jacket sleeves, I saw the tattoos. That familiar feeling took over my body and I shook it away. He leaned over and whispered in my ear,

"Didn't think I'd see you so soon Taylor." I looked over into his hazel eyes and everything I wanted to say, left me. I was speechless and I honesty can't remember the last time John legitimately took my breath away with that one look.

"Hey Punkers, I didn't think you'd show."

"Punkers; my God really? I wasn't going to, but I can't stay away from this business long."

Nodding, I tried watching the match; all the while not being able to think straight. What the fuck is happening to me? No, I can't do this to Hope. Or John. No matter how tempting Punk is. With those arms, all the tattoos, that lip ring, his arms. The way he makes me feel so...full. No Taylor, enough. Apparently he knew my thoughts because next thing I knew, our chairs were closer than before, and his hand was grabbing mine. I let him too. His fingers laced through mine and I felt at ease. He pulled out his phone and texted someone. Next thing I knew, my phone vibrated in my jean jacket. Using my free hand, I checked it.

Punk: A white dress at a wrestling event, trying to get Johnny distracted?

Taylor: Haha. You're the only one paying attention. This is wrong you know; holding my hand.

Punk: Yet, you're not stopping me, are you?

He had me there. Putting my phone away, I kept an eye on the match that was nearly over. John had five wins and Big Show only two, with five minutes left remaining. In the last couple minutes, John went to do the five knuckle shuffle, but not before smiling at me and mouthing that he loves me.

I pulled my hand away from Punk. John's right there, what were we thinking? Once John won the match, Punk hurried and left; without so much as a goodbye. I watched his retreating form, not wanting him to leave yet. As cameras followed John, he found his way over to me. A camera man asked who I was and John laughed.

"My girlfriend, Taylor Helmsley." Then he kissed me. To my surprise, I didn't think about Punk this time.

Another week later, and I was still at home with John. I hadn't seen Punk since the house show. I've called his sister Shalene, and she said he and Emma were both great. John was back to usual, except when Punk got mentioned. He tended to tense up. I decided to forget about what happened with Punk; I love only John after all.

I finished making spaghetti, when my phone rang. Punk, the caller ID displayed.

"Hey, what's-"

"Taylor! It's Emma. She had a fever of one hundred point one, and I didn't know what to do, so I took her to the hospital. She's getting checked out now."

My heart started pounding in my chest; she's the last part of Hope left, and she's merely a month and a half year old. Let her be okay. Thinking of what to say, John walked into the room from his shower. I stopped putting the food in the bowls, and grabbed my purse and keys. John looked worried, but I shook my head.

"You did the right thing. Listen, I'm just leaving now. I'll be there soon so don't freak out."

"Alright," I went to hang up, but his voice stopped me, "and Taylor?" The way he said my name; so soft and meaningful made me want to kiss him right then and there.

"Yes, Punk?" John's face paled at the name, and a wave of fury flashed over his defined features. Punk sighed,

"Come back, please? Emma needs you." Turning away from John, I hoped he couldn't hear what I was about to say. I couldn't believe it myself. Punk wasn't making the whole forgetting what happened thing any easier.

"Emma," I whispered, "or you?"

"Taylor, you should know that answer," he paused and I waited, "I can't believe I'm being this fucking mushy, but I need you too."

My God he just said it. He's not big on emotions, but I fell even harder right there.

"You have me. I'm on my way. See you soon."

Shutting my phone, I turned around to face a flustered looking John. He crossed his arms over his broad chest and said,

"Punk, what'd he want?"

"Emma is sick at the hospital and I told him I'm on my way." John went to grab his shoes,

"Want me to come too? Dinner can wait." Walking up to him, I kissed his lips and said no.

"It shouldn't be that long. Just eat and I'll talk to you later."

"Are you coming home or going home with Brooks again?" I shrugged.

"Depends on how Emma is." He mockingly chuckled, and I got pissed off. I need to get to Emma; to Punk. "What is it now John?"

"You do realize you're not her mom right? Last I checked, that's Hope's family, not yours Taylor."

Right then and there I was ready to slap him across the face. How dare he bring up something I've always known? In that moment John had me thinking that if Phil has any feelings for me, he really doesn't; just the parts of me that would remind him of Hope. That's his only love. Is that the truth though?

"Fuck you John. I'm just keeping a promise to my dead best friend. I know I'll never be Emma's mom or Punk won't ever love me," my heart broke saying that for some reason, "They aren't my family, but it's not like we have a family, now do we John?"

"Taylor, don't even start. You knew once I divorced Liz, I wanted to be with you and focus on my career. I don't want a family right now."

"You might not John, but I always have. Ya know, you won't give me a family, so I just am taking care of one. Dammit John, I'm not asking for a family and a ring right now, but can you look me in the eye and tell me that you want it all with me. That we have a future?"

"Taylor, you know I love you."

Somehow that's not the answer I wanted to hear. When he couldn't say it, my heart broke further. Now you know why I said we had a questionable relationship anymore. I walked outside and opened my car door. John followed me. I said something before he could.

"You may love me John, but I don't know if that's enough for me anymore." With that, I hopped into my car and took off. Maybe they weren't my family, but a part of me wishes they were.

Once I got into the waiting room, the first person I saw was Punk. He stood up and walked towards me, as I began slowly heading towards him. We ended up meeting in the middle.

"You came," he said.

"I said I would."

Next thing I knew, I was engulfed in his arms.

"You weren't here yet, and I got worried. My daughter's sick, I didn't want something to be wrong with you too." I smiled at his worrying, and couldn't help but notice he didn't mention Hope. Through all of this, she's all I've thought about. She must hate me now.

"I'm fine. A fight with John but I'm fine. How's Emma?"

As if on cue, out came the doctor. Dr. Davis said the name tag. Punk grabbed my hand and walked us up to him.

"Mr. Brooks, Emma is fine; just a touch of the cold. Her body fighting the infection caused her temperature. With some sleep and the medicine I'm prescribing, she'll be good as new."

"Thanks so much, doc. Can I see her?" The wrestler sighed in relief as the older man nodded. I followed inside as Phil held his baby girl. She cooed as he tickled her belly.

"You know, when Hope died, she made me promise to take care of the both of you," I began telling the truth, "that's why I stayed so long. Really, I would've looked out for you two regardless. Seeing you with her though, I don't really think you need me."

He brought her over and placed Emma-Lynn in my arms. Her big blue eyes looked up at me, and I didn't know whether to cry or smile. I chose the latter.

"She'll need you, always. I'll need you; especially when I'm on the road again." He smiled; I did too knowing he missed wrestling. In all honest, there is no CM Punk without it. It's his life; well was.

"When will that be, exactly?"

He shrugged,

"I'm not sure yet; eventually though. I'll always miss and love Hope, but I need to get back to my life. My job, ya know?" I nodded. The two of us sat there with her, and it felt both wrong and right. There was a tension in the room, and we both knew it. After we left the hospital, we headed back to his house. Once we got there, he lay her down for bed.

I checked my phone to see that John had texted me several times, and then a missed call from my dad.

"Hey, sorry about that Daddy, what's up?"

"Hey princess, your mom and I were thinking about visiting. Will we be able to stay with you?"

"Hell yes! I have the guest room; I can't wait to see you both."

Hunter chuckled,

"I can't wait to see you either. But I have to go. We'll see you soon. Love ya baby girl."

"Love you too daddy."

Smiling, I hung up the phone. It's about time I see him. Dad and Mom lives in Connecticut, so I never really get to see him. Plus, getting my law degree is taking longer than I thought. As I stood in the living room, I felt arms wrap around me from behind.

"How is Triple H enjoying time off?"

I laughed and turned around to face him, then wrapped my arms around him too; resting my head on his chest.

"He's enjoying it. He's visiting soon, so maybe you'll see him."

"He used to intimidate the hell out of me. I remember the first time I met you; you were traveling with him on the road. You remember what you said to me?" I shook my head as he ran his hand up and down my back.

Truth is, I was utterly shocked that he even remembered. I highly doubt John would. Looking up at him, his eyes had this life to it that I hadn't seen in a while.

"You looked at me with your big blue eyes, and you said to me, ' If my dad gets hurt again because some new guy thinks he knows it all and fucks up, I won't be afraid to get into that ring and scream at his ass.' I loved how protective and close you were with him. Plus, you were so honest about it, yet it was still funny coming from a scrawny girl like you."

Laughing, I remembered that day. From then on, Punk and I were friends. Then I became friends with John too, and liked them both. However, John and Liz were ending things, shortly after. Hope came to visit and fell for Punk, and then as I said before, things fell into place. Years later, everything wasn't like we all thought it'd be.

"I remember that. I love that you do too; it means a lot." Next thing I knew, we were on the couch, kissing. As I straddled him, his lips were on my neck, hands roaming everywhere.

"Punk," I said breathlessly pulling away, "I can't do this. I have to get home."

I got up to leave but he pulled me back to him.

"Taylor, God dammit stop running from this!"

"I'm not running from anything! You just miss Hope and I'm the closest thing you have to filling the void-"

Punk began fuming as he interrupted me,

"What the hell! Yes, I'll always miss her, we were together for two years, and we have a kid together. I won't ever regret that. But I'm not falling in love with you to fill some damn void. Last week I knew it was you, and I don't regret it! Matter of fact, ever since we've been getting closer I've wondered how I ever let you get away from me years ago."

Boom, there it was, the truth. Years ago he picked Hope and I picked John. I waited on John to realize how horrible Liz was, so I never gave any guy a chance. Sure there were dates, but nothing serious, so even if while I waited on John, Hope fell for Punk, who I had always had feelings for, I let her happiness come first. After all, I had wanted John for so long; I thought that'd be my final decision.

My heart broke as I spoke,

"You and Hope loved each other, you don't love me."

"Taylor," Punk crept closer and made me look at him, and such love and conviction shown in his eyes that I felt ridiculous for fighting him in this. "You know me; I'm not the feely and mushy kind of guy. A part of me has always loved you and all this time together made me realize I still do love you. I'm pretty much laying my shit bare for you right now T."

Tears prickled at my eyes, and I couldn't believe it. For a moment I was ready to throw caution to the wind and do what I've wanted to do for weeks now. Deep down, it wouldn't be right; at least not yet.

"Punk, I've been feeling things too. I'm still with John and I do love him. I just...I can't do this right now. I'm so sorry."

Kissing his cheek, I then ran out into the cold autumn night, to get into my car to get home. Well, back to John's. This shouldn't be happening! Things have gotten out of hand. I'm not going to lie; I've fallen in love with him. More people are involved than just us though.

I finally wound up in the driveway, then back on the couch, again. My heart was breaking as I thought of hurting Punk. How John would be hurt too. Then Emma of course; I mean I can't just be in her life and then leave her. I'm not her mom though either.

As I went in and out of consciousness, my sole thought was how I might've just let the greatest thing that's ever been in my life, get away.