I do not own Sword Art Online or any of the characters.

Die Hards

Michael walked out of the inn and stopped. There were exactly five Laughing Coffin Members in front of him. On, was a recreation of Red-Eyed XaXa, one was a recreation of Johnny Black who had been the other person working with XaXa and Sinkawa, and one was Archon.

"What the fuck?" Michael snarled. "I killed one of you and two of you are in prison."

"True," Archon nodded stepping forward. "But, this is simply an avatar. And this avatar happens to be extremely strong. Now, it's showtime."

"Mother fucker!" Michael snapped. "PoH? You're playing as Archon now? God damnit!"

XaXa darted forward, slashing at Michael with his estoch and Michael swept it aside then kicked him, knocking him backward before leaping backward as Johnny Black slashed through the space he had occupied.

"This is a nice fucking surprise," Michael snarled. "Ambushed by the leaders of old Laughing Coffin."

He spun, blocking a meat cleaver and dagger, held by PoH. Then, he spun, shoving PoH away and stabbing at XaXa only for XaXa to block it and Johnny Black to slash him. Michael leapt away, poison eating away at his life and the extra member leapt at Michael, slamming a massive warhammer into his face, launching him.

"Bastard," Michael spat, pushing himself up.

The extra appeared behind Michael but Michael raised his foot, blocking the hammer then spun, slahing the player and removing his head. Then, he spun, blocking PoH and XaXa's blades before jumping back from Johnny Black. Just as Michael landed, the last one appeared and Michael blocked a silver arming sword and stared at the same Laughing Coffin member who had been Michael's first kill in SAO. The member shoved him away and grinned, following, raising his sword.

"Not a repeat this time," Michael snorted.

He stepped forward, sweeping the player's sword aside before slashing him diagonally across the chest. He staggered back and Michael lunged, stabbing at him only for PoH to sweep it aside, Johnny Black stabbing at him from the other side. Michael swore, leaping to the side but suffering a scratch in his side that infected him with poison again. Michael spun, slashing at him and Johnny Black jumped back before XaXa stabbed Michael from behind. He pulled his sword free and Michael staggered to the side, falling onto his side as the three Laughing Coffin members stood over him.

"Damn," Michael smirked. "Looks like you got me."

"Of course," PoH laughed. "We're better than you."

"I wouldn't say that," Michael smirked. "You just ambushed me is all."

Johnny Black raised his knife. Just as he moved to stab Michael, Kirito crashed into him, hurling him away. Johnny Black flipped, landing on his feet. Then, he sprinted forward, slashing at Kirito. Michael pushed himself up just before a green aura appeared around him, healing him. Then, Klein and Asuna arrived, charging at Johnny Black who was fighting Kirito with XaXa. Kirito turned on XaXa, charging at him while Michael charged at PoH. PoH smirked, knocking the blade aside and punched Michael, hurling Michael backward. Michael landed on his back and Kirito landed beside him.

"Yours stronger than you thought too?" Kirito sked.

"Maybe," Michael grumbled standing. "It is Archon's avatar with PoH inside."

Kirito nodded, also standing and equipping a second sword, this one with a black "Y" shaped grip and guard and a blue blade with a matching blue gem se into the handle at the base of the blade. Then, he charged again, attacking XaXa with both.

"Well he's gone," Michael snorted just as Johnny Black shattered and Klein and Asuna rushed over to Michael's side.

PoH laughed and charged, slashing at Michael. Michael blocked it and Klein and Asuna both slashed at him, only barely missing. PoH spun, kicking Klein aside then caught Asuna's sword with his free hand. Asuna's eyes widened as PoH pulled his cleaver back.

"Fuck you!" Michael snapped, stabbing at him.

PoH spun past the blade, hurling Asuna then raised the cleaver upside down, blocking both of Kirito's swords. XaXa leapt up behind Kirito slashing at him but Kirkto spun, slashing his sword aside then stabbing him with his sword glowing blue, a massive chunk of ice exploding out of XaXa's back before shattering, along with XaXa. Michael slashed at PoH and PoH blocked it, ducking as Klein's flaming sword passed over him.

"Damn," Klein swore just as PoH's foot crashed into his chest, launching him.

Asuna stepped up next, stabbing rapidly at Poh and Poh avoided the strikes before slashing Asuna across thechest. Her health dropped to red but her armor had no wound mark on it.

"What the..." Asuna blinked before groaning. "It ignores armor!"

"Son of a bitch!" Michael growled. "You would have a cheap trick like that."

PoH laughed and Michael and Kirito charged from opposite sides. PoH spun, knocking all three swords away then raised his foot, kicking the bottom of Klein's sword's buttcap, launching the sword.

"Bastard!" Klein swore.

PoH slashed him then grabbed his arm, hurling him into Michael and Kirito began to attack him. After a minute, PoH slashed him across the chest. A second later, Michael stepped forward, activating his OSS. PoH managed to block three slashes but the fourth tore through PoH's torso and it continued from there. When Michael finished, PoH staggered away then grinned, lunging forward and raising his cleaver. Just before it hit, an arrow burried itself in his face and his avatar shattered. Michael sighed, standing and looking back at Sinon. Then, he ducked under a cleaver as PoH reformed and attacked instantly.

"You bastard!" Michael spat leaping away. "What the fuck?"

"You mean you don't know?" PoH asked. "Of all people? Ha! It should be obvious, I hired a hacker."

"Oh fuck that then," Michael snorted, pulling up his menu and swiping sideways, pulling a screan of code up. "Anything he can hack, I can hack better."

Michael began to type at his screen and Kirito and Klein charged at PoH. Michael's screen flashed red and a chat box opened.

"He's hacked," Michael stated. "I'm unhacking this time."

Just as his avatar began to blur, the chat box vanished and his avatar solidified itself. Then, Michael continued.

"On good terms with the GM are we?" PoH asked, slashing past Kirito, Klein, Asuna, and Sinon and leaping at Michael.

Eugene landed in front of Michael, blocking the cleaver.

"Thank you," Michael smirked.

Then, he closed out of the window, standing as PoH leapt back.

"He should be manigable now," Michael stated. "Would you care to do the honors?"

Eugene grinned, stepping forward and slashing. PoH moved to block his sword and the sword passed through the cleaver, splitting PoH in half, killing him.

"There," Eugene smirked. "Good thing he didn't know about my sword. Who was it?"

"The leader of the original Laughing Coffin," Michael stated. "And a guy who hired a hacker to cheat for him."

Eugene nodded and they all turned toward the next dungeon, flying into the air and leaving the city behind.

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