"This is delicious," exclaimed Simone in indistinct tones while swallowing morsels of hot dog as they ambled down the concrete staircase back to the beach."I haven't tasted anything as good like this in years."
A step ahead of her, Annabelle shook her head affectionately and a smile spread across her face. Her one time teacher had a hitherto unsuspected childlike quality which was really endearing. Everything that woman of hers said and did felt good to her, she thought to herself in a sudden upwards swing in mood of light-hearted happiness.
Once they'd found their feet on the sands again, they felt human. They chatted as they walked along and the cheap food felt good. The fair haired woman found a tissue in her pocket to wipe the stray mustard that was left at the corners of Annabelle's mouth and then her own. The dark haired woman loved that little gesture of being cared for. Impulsively, Simone's arm reached round the younger woman's waist and her hand rested on her curves as they slowly walked along. Annabelle's hand and her emotions went out in return as she felt the sleek lines of her lover. This was bliss as they walked along the afternoon sky and the shadows on the beach started to lengthen.
"Are you a connoisseur of hot dogs Annabelle?" that soft voice sounded in her ear. The soft laugh that answered told the sharp witted woman that there was an intriguing backstory to this.
"I had a complete food craving for them once when I was a kid. I used to sneak out of school and found this cheap joint that cooked them right. Sometimes I didn't get covered and I got spotted. I never told the teacher what I was up to so they suspected the worst, whatever that was. That's how come I was expelled from school, the first time and I got a record as a troublemaker. It even hit the front page of the Los Angeles Tribune After that, I stopped eating them as I was putting on weight."
"So you got expelled-over hot dogs? I can't believe it or, wait a minute, yes I can," laughed Simone, enchanted at the enchantingly innocent explanation of the luridly recounted written reports she'd seen of Annabelle's lengthy record of school indiscipline which was guaranteed to chill the blood of the boldest teacher. This quietly contemplative woman whose hand was softly pressed against her bare skin was something dissociated from the reports. She knew that what she was discovering about the fascinating depths of this mature loving woman was the real thing.
"You're the only one who knows this- and why I kept on wearing those Buddhist prayer beads. Nobody else would have known," observed that delightfully familiar voice from some place close to her as she gave Simone's waist a gentle, affectionate squeeze. She was referring to the way that Annabelle had, once again, headed for a full on confrontation with authority over her persistent and unreasoning breach of school uniform even after she'd exchanged her denim jacket and short skirt for a regulation white blouse and approved pattern check skirt. She jibbed at removing the beads and it was only when Simone sought to engage with her thinking, to ask the reason why when she discovered how this was a memento of her first lover who had been shipped out to Europe.
.
"I love you so much I want to know everything about you," Simone murmured softly in the other woman's ear.
"The more I know you, the more I love you and want to know more about you, Simone," the younger woman murmured in a dreamy haze, loving their close proximity .
They had been walking a dreamy mile or so while the sun shone behind them. Their feet had paced out a trail that meandered all over the place without either of them thinking just how far they'd walked in terms of the beach house and the café. They suddenly focussed on their location until they suddenly realised that they had come close to home again without them noticing. They both suddenly felt thirsty and hungry.
"Is it all right if I ask a question?"Annabelle asked very politely.
"Sure," the fair haired woman answered. Inwardly, she was slightly nervous as last time the younger woman had spoken that way, it was to softly prize out Simone's locked up secret about her first love, Amanda and unlock a floodload of tears she'd never been permitted before to shed.
"I want to fetch my case from the car. It's got all the things I need for home. I mean you do want me to move in with you, Simone? I know I do."
A surge of completely different emotions flooded through the older woman as first the delicately turned phrase hit her. The touchingly uncertain question that was really a heartfelt plea got to her deepest emotions.
"Of course I want it too, more than anything in my life. Do you need a hand with the case?" Simone asked
"No problems. It's in a wheelie suitcase. You find me spare space in your wardrobes and stuff," the younger woman said perkily.
Annabelle positively skipped out of the house, taking her holdall as it had the car keys inside. Her clattering footsteps across the boardwalk and then up the staircase faded into obscurity. In the meantime, Simone started to look through her wardrobes and chest of drawers and sort out spare space. It only took a short while for her to create the space to her satisfaction and she looked around the beach house with great satisfaction. It was only as she contemplated the situation that she became aware of a yawning absence in the atmosphere. Everywhere felt so still and quiet. Her eyes started to look around the bedroom where the crumpled duvet looked much the same before when only she had lived these past weeks after she had been released from police custody. All the life and magic felt as if it were draining out of the flat as if she'd only been dreaming that her lover had come back to her. Her pulse started racing away with anxiety as her sense of time had become scrambled. Her darling Annabelle had been away for way too long. Something bad had happened to her- or had she appeared at all? Was this some kind of hideous dream she was in right now which she wanted to wake up out of? Her hands started to shake and she ran them through her hair and she became oblivious to sounds except the nightmare that locked her in.
"Simone, I'm back," called out a voice as the rumbling sound of wheels along her boardwalk announced her return. She had her guitar case perilously perched on the top of her case.
"Simone, what's wrong?" the voice so dear to her in all the world finally broke in on her churning reverie. The younger woman returned and saw her lover, white faced, her face in her hands and trembling. Scared as she was by something that had sneaked up on her while she'd been away, she let the case drop and folded Simone into her arms.
It was the physical contact that did the trick as Simone realised the feel of that well remembered body against hers, the strong arms that wound themselves round her shoulders. To Annabelle's intense relief, her lover's body gradually stopped shaking and clung to her as if she would never let her go. Then, she greeted her with a long, soft kiss and, pulling slightly back, attempted to smile.
"Tell me what happened. I've only been away ten minutes,"Annabelle said as a suspicion as to what happened dawned on her. They'd not talked about what had happened to each other since Simone had been arrested. She filed that away for later business.
"As short as that?" Simone said bemusedly. The dark haired woman took her gently by the hand and led her to the bed where they lay down facing each other. Both of them decided that this was the most comfortable place to unload sensitive feelings.
"Wheeling that case down the steps was a real pain in the ass. It took longer than I thought. I did need your help instead of trying to be Action Woman." The younger woman's capacity for simple, honest explanations with her dash of self-deprecating humour lightened Simone's feelings. The beach house suddenly felt normal again as everything came back to life.
"Darling, you don't have to worry. Nothing physically happened, no police raids or Mother Immaculata coming down the chimney," Simone said with a shaky laugh which drew a faint smile from Annabelle."Somehow,I really flipped out for a reason I couldn't explain Don't get me wrong, I'm not neurotic."
"I know you're not. You've had a lot of shit to put up with recently," the younger woman said softly, hugging her gently.
"Perhaps it was some living nightmare of what I'd be like if you weren't around," the older woman said, running her hand through a lock of fair hair that had strayed across her face before she finally steadied herself and she got a grip of the world around her.
"This has taught me one thing. I want so much us for us to live together from here on in after everything we've been through. I want nothing more in life than to wake up every morning and feeling you next to me. I couldn't bear to being ever apart from you, sweetheart " she continued, her definite tone of voice edging into passion.
Annabelle caught her breath,a huge smile suddenly spread across her face and she felt tears prickle her eyes. So much of her efforts had gone into catching her former teacher's attention desperately attracting the attention of the woman who'd intrigued her as mysteriously unplaceable. Somehow, without knowing it, she'd played the game of life far more wisely than she knew all along the line and everything had finally come right. Everything she'd wanted for so long was now theirs for the asking.
"I used to lie in my bed at St Theresa's and dream all about you. After I stayed over here at spring break, I used to wonder if we'd ever live like this all the time. I never let myself believe this could really happen."
Along with a dreamy enchanted quality in Annabelle's voice, her eyes told Simone that her constancy didn't need to be asked for. It was undeniably, hugely present. They drew closer and gently cuddled each other in the subdued lighting. The peace and tranquillity felt so good to them, so soothing. Every bad thought was washed away by their state of fairyland enchantment.
"I'm starving. Want to let me do the cooking? My parents wouldn't ever believe I was actually domesticated," the younger woman suddenly said with that touchingly rapid leap in her train of thought. It was an endearing quality that Simone got to love about her the more they were around each other. She was never quite sure what this lover of hers would come up with next. There was a more serious purpose here as this was Annabelle's quiet way of contributing her fair share.
"Does it really make you nervous. I promise I won't trash the place," the younger woman said, her grey blue eyes locking with the older woman. Simone laughed lightly at her own possessiveness of the kitchen area.
Simone quietly set the table, looked out a couple of large white candles to Annabelle's approving nod while she busied herself neatly in rustling up home made burgers out of some onions and mincemeat she found, decorated the plates with salad and shouted out when dinner was ready. Simone lit the candles and poured out a glass of chilled wine into shapely cut glass creations that drew an appreciative glance from the younger woman.
"I love all this," she said approvingly."Sipping wine with candlelit meals. Do you know, my mother never let me go anywhere near the kitchen? She thought I'd mess it up along with everything in her perfect world."
Simone raised her eyebrows. She always thought that her beach house was neatly kept and couldn't see what Annabelle was driving at. The younger woman's open eyed gaze never left her lover as the delicate colours and shades from the candlelight made Simone look magical. Even the sound of her name sounded cultured as she mouthed it to herself.
"This is different Simone. This is home where everything feels lived in and comfortable. Everything that's decorative has real taste. Nothing's here for show for important political friends. I became a real slob out of principle and because there wasn't any love around."
Despite the dreamy contented quality of the younger woman's voice as the words were phrased slowly, leisurely, Simone wouldn't dream of suppressing a pang of instinctive sympathy for this woman who seemed to have done her growing up all by herself. The more Simone knew of Annabelle, the more she profoundly respected her. They started to eat their meal and every morsel tasted delicious to Simone. She sensed her lover's sharp eyes on her for any false politeness and Annabelle smiled widely, sensing how her culinary arts had gone down so well. She knew that Simone knew how secretly nervous she'd been all along.
"Do you know, ever since you've been here, you haven't smoked one cigarette? I can't believe it," laughed Simone suddenly, unconsciously picking up on her partner's personality quirk.
"It was all for show, just so everyone could think I'm so tough," Annabelle replied with that laconic, self-deprecating manner that said so much. Simone knew how soft and tender the dark-haired woman really was.
Later, Simone looked on lovingly as her partner propped her guitar case next to the wardrobe for a start and proudly placed all her belongings into the spaces left for her. She smiled at the inevitable eyeliner, a makeup trait which was the very first thing she noticed about Annabelle and observed how she neatly hung up her clothes all of which created warm nostalgic feelings of all the various facets of this extraordinary woman, including her denim jacket, complete with patches alluding to the rock and world. The dark-haired woman briefly recalled how Cat had spitefully commented on it at their very first acquaintance. Her eye catching dress in oriental print prompted painful memories in both of them as this was the dress she'd worn at the dance which had rammed in her feelings of helplessness to connect with Simone.
"It's a beautiful dress," Simone said softly, taking in the dark haired woman's suddenly wary expression and feeling the shiny texture. "We need to go out on the town to some club where we can feel comfortable, me in my white lace dress that you once ripped off my back and you in this creation. We need to get the associations right."
The sudden warm smile that swept across Annabelle's face told Simone that she'd guessed right. She placed the dress on the coat hanger and kissed her lover warmly.
Finally, she coloured delicately as she brought out a brown envelope and shyly produced the photographs of her happy, smiling self from when she'd been here that distant spring bank holiday.
"We'll frame them,"Simone declared proudly."We have to do it."
"There's one thing missing," the younger woman said, fixing Simone with her penetrating eyes, visibly glowing ."We need a good picture of both of us."
"Oh yes," Simone said, her eyes glowing, fervently pressing her hands together.