All the things of the Kuroshitsuji are not belonging to this person here writing the words.

Also I have an A03. Link on my profile.

Grell was the first one home that night, and Ciel was very happy to see him. He was still shaken up about that man from earlier, and wanted nothing more than the routine of home, even if it meant the rather brash and hard-edge of his male mother. Meyrin would be along later and Angelina would most likely not return until late into the night if not the next day. She had leave to take as much as was needed to secure a new client for the brothel, and sometimes it took up to a week. Though Ciel expected that it was because she liked to be away from the confines of the brothel and not just because she was working on getting a new client. However, even if he was just staying the night with Grell, it was better than sitting alone and musing over the black-haired man's curious gaze.

"Have a good day, brat?" The voice of Grell was as obnoxious and condescending as it was welcome to the small fourteen year old.

"Got a big haul, yeah." He replied absentmindedly.

"So, let me see and I'll give you a gift." Grell said and Ciel nodded and stood, walking over to the man's bed. He sat next to the man on the bed and emptied his pockets of the bills he had been handed by the nice gentleman. Grell's eyes nearly popped from his sockets at the site. "Ciel! This is nearly double what I make in a week!" He exclaimed.

Ciel looked at him with an expression that was half astounded and half uncaring. He was surprised the man gave him that much, but at the same time, the worry over the black-haired man was tugging at him viciously. What if the man had seen him run into the brothel? Every noise made Ciel think the police had come to take him away and arrest him for thievery. Or worse, that the Madam and brothel Owner knew of his presence and would surely be kicked out of the brothel with nowhere to go. He would starve, freeze to death, and what of his mothers? They would be punished, kicked out as well, and women fared far worse on the street than he would. At least he could run away to the docks and take ship as a cabin boy or join the army as an apprentice. Meyrin and Angelina would become street walkers or end up in jail. The idea terrified Ciel. And Grell would probably be executed or imprisoned for life for being homosexual and a cross dresser.

"Brat, are you okay?"

Ciel looked up at his momma of ten years and realized he'd probably been staring off into space. The unusual gentleness of Grell's voice meant Ciel had looked distressed. Though he never acted like it, Grell was probably the most protective of his parents. Grell had often raised hell and high water when Ciel came home from working in tears, demanding names or descriptions or the location of the brick that scraped his knee so Grell could take revenge on it. The over dramatic behavior of his male mother was cause for amusement that often cheered Ciel up faster than if Grell truly had murdered the brick that made him trip and skin his knee. Ciel smiled a little at the memory and nodded at Grell.

"Yeah. I'm fine. Just had a bit of a scare. I think I almost got caught today." He said and Grell nodded slowly, as if he did not entirely understand the situation. That was probably likely, seeing as Grell did not understand much outside of sex, fashion, violent ways to harm inanimate objects and his taste in men. If something did not involve one of those four things, it was probably not the best to ask Grell for advice. But his momma was nothing if not stubborn and persevering.

"Anything I can do?" He offered, though Ciel suspected he already knew the answer was no. Grell was horrible at reading people and their emotions, but he could at least tell when there was nothing he could do. But it was common human courtesy to at least offer assistance, even though nothing could be done.

"No. I'll just be more careful tomorrow." Ciel said and Grell nodded, taking the bills from the blankets and stuffing them into the bottom of one of his jewelry boxes. That was where Grell, Angelina and Meyrin had be storing their extra tips along with the money Ciel made from conning. That was how they bought dinner some nights, and others were given to Ciel to make purchases in the shops outside of the brothel's permission. It was technically illegal by the rules of the brothel, but many of the prostitutes did it. And as long as the purchases were nothing huge like dresses or ornate jewelry, it was a practice that was very much overlooked by both the Madam and the owner.

"You're going out again?" Grell asked. "You could stay here for a bit and let this problem of yours blow over."

Ciel shook his head. "No, it's alright. I'll just go down a different street." He said with a shrug, feeling the weight of the paper bag shift and he pulled the purchase from his shirt. "I almost forgot," he said with a grin, "I bought all of us some candy sticks and lollipops today." He proclaimed proudly, opening the bag and dumping the six candy sticks on the bed. Grell chuckled and grabbed a cinnamon flavored stick before popping it into his mouth and beginning to strip off his working clothes. While it was true he felt the most comfortable in women's clothing, the dresses and outfits he had to wear to get customers were uncomfortable at best. Ciel watched the man's transformation with an almost incredible awe as he always did.

It was almost beautiful, watching Grell's transformation from common brothel woman to laid back man. His hair was still the length of his body and he preferred to keep his makeup on, but once he donned his trousers, shirt and vest, he seemed more real. It was like watching a butterfly come at his face and then suddenly you discover it was really a leaf that hits your face, not the butterfly you thought it was. Just as brilliant, but far less fanciful. Ciel smiled to himself as the man before him sat in the seat in front of his personal vanity. The man was beautiful, of that Ciel was positive, but he seemed so obviously fake when he was outside of this room.

"How is it you can pretend day after day that this is what you love doing?" Ciel asked and Grell laughed.

"Because that is exactly what it is, dear one, pretending. I pretend to love it here, I pretend to love being a man, I pretend to love and have affection for my clients and I pretend to not have any dreams. Anyone can fake a smile, brat, but it takes a true actress to be able to smile for real even though she's lying. And I am the finest actress there is. Because I put on an act so real, that for a moment, even I believe the falsehood I've woven." He replied.

"So you believe your own lie?"

"Naturally. It's a key part to living here in the Red, dearest brat. You have to pretend nothing bothers you, nothing troubles you and that you are truly happy. That's what the men come for. The illusion that everything is alright and perfect." He said again and Ciel nodded.

Pretending...that was something Ciel had no trouble doing.

The next day happened just the same as all the other days. His mothers left for their respective jobs in the brothel while Ciel stayed behind to prepare for a day of working the heart strings and easy minds of the Red Light virgins who would know no better. HE decided that he would try to do as Grell did: believe his own lie. If it worked, Ciel would do it more often, but if it did not, well Grell was not always supposed to be listened too seriously. He donned his raggedy torn shirt from before, but grabbed some new trousers and put them on before adding some gloves to the mix. They were black and made of some fabric made to resemble leather, Angelina had given them to him as a birthday gift last year. And interesting thing, his birthday, since they just decided to pick a day close to when they found him since Ciel could not remember his actual birthday. December fourteenth ended up being the day they celebrated his birthday, and Ciel accepted it.

Once the gloves were in place and strapped on, Ciel grabbed the back door key and headed out, this time towards the back of the ally and to the street behind the Black Lace. Once he deemed the streets clear enough for his continue, Ciel took off in a run down the streets, going no particular direction, just running. He spotted a rich man just up the street and took into a sprint, running head long in to the man. He heard the man's gasp of surprise and huff of lost breath as Ciel's small form collided with him and sent them tumbling to the ground. Ciel was quick to untangle himself from the man and backed away quickly.

"I-I'm sorry!" He shouted. "I didn't mean to run into you, I swear it! I just...I thought I saw..." He panted, unable to finish a sentence as the man stood and dusted his pants off.

"No harm done, dear boy. What is troubling you so much that you ran in to me?" The man asked, taking Ciel by the wrist so he could not run again. Ciel trembled.

"I-I thought I saw someone f-following me. My older brother said he would pick me up by the dress shop when he was done meeting with his friend, b-but it's been hours and he hasn't come yet! S-s-so when I saw a big scary guy coming towards me, I thought for sure he would hurt me, so I just ran and now I don't know where I am and I'm sure my brother is worried since he was going to take me out to breakfast later and I just-" Ciel's ranting was cut short by the man putting a hand over his mouth.

"Hush, lad. No need to panic. There's no one behind you now. Let's go find your brother together." He said gently, calming Ciel down.

"O-okay."

"Would you like to get some breakfast with me instead?" The man asked and Ciel nodded slowly.

"I-I guess that would be alright, if you d-don't mind. I mean, I can wait until he finds us..." As if on cue, Ciel's stomach growled in protest, making the boy blush a bit and look away, causing the man to chuckle.

"Come on, lad, breakfast is this way." He said, leading the boy with a hand to the small of his back. Ciel nodded and followed the man to food, smiling with genuine thanks.

The French were nothing if not plentiful with their food; Ciel felt like he had eaten more than he would in his life in one sitting. Thick foods made of potatoes, eggs, German meats and thick fruit sauces, Ciel had never seen so much food in one sitting. And eating it all had left Ciel slow and contended as he wandered the streets with his gentleman donor. He looked in and out of the windows of the shops that lined the streets, spotting things he one day wanted to buy his mothers for holidays such as Christmas or their own birthdays. He spotted a red and pink striped scarf of British make he was certain Grell would love when it got colder (the man had always complained about working the street when it started to snow), and if anyone could make the plainness of British sewing-craft work, it was Grell. And he spotted a small glass beaded hairpin that sparkled like anything the fancy ladies had that would be beautiful against Meyrin's stunning auburn locks. She would look every bit as lovely as the older women who had patrons or regular clients, something that Meyrin often struggled with.

It was while he was looking at a possible gift idea for Angelina when he felt the man's eyes on him. Being well-trained in being careful, Ciel was instantly on alert. It was not like the gaze of the man from the day before, no, it was far different. It was a gaze Ciel had never felt before; it was hard and studying. It made Ciel feel as if he was on display and instantly a huge red flag waved in his head, bright as Angelina's hair. He suddenly felt the need to take off in a run towards wherever Grell might be, or just run in general. But just as quickly as the feeling came, it vanished, and Ciel knew the man had ceased watching him. Ciel very carefully got his composure back, still feigning looking at the things in the window, before turning around to face the man who had been so generous with his money earlier. In order for this to work, Ciel would have to push back his coiled tension and relax himself. The man could not know that Ciel was suspicious of him, so Ciel had to stop being suspicious. Like Grell said; believe his own lie. He smiled at the man again and the man smiled back.

"Finished window shopping, my boy?" He asked and Ciel nodded.

"Yep. But none of these places look like the dress shop where brother was supposed to meet me." Ciel added, looking around confused. "Or really anything by it. I couldn't have run that far away, could I?" He asked the man rhetorically.

"I'm sure we'll find it. Come along." The man responded and Ciel obediently followed, latching on to the man's arm and looked around excitedly. He felt the hard watching gaze on him again, but this time swallowed his worry in order to keep the outside looking perfect. He could tell that he was close to a big break through and would make another big haul today if he could just charm the man out of some more money. The man seemed loaded, and that was Ciel's goal. Not like he would truly be taking anything the man could probably not replace.

Stopping again at another window, he spotted a red French lace fan with black feathers adorning the edges, clearly more of a visual piece than to be used as an actual fan. Its handle was also black, hiding the bright red fabric of the fan, and was adorned with gold floral swirls like Ciel had seen in many of the books about French royals he had read about. It was a piece of artwork, and indescribably perfect for Angelina. Angelina used to have a red and black fan but Ciel had accidentally broken it during one of their fights. Angelina had not spoken to him for a week after that and the guilt ate away at Ciel every time he thought about it. It had been one of the last things her husband had given her before he went off to war and died, and Ciel had just senselessly broken it. If he could get that fan, the one in the window, he knew it would make things better. It was far more ornate than her previous one, but Ciel knew from the moment he saw it that Angelina would love it. He cursed his inability to read money and understand it, for he could not understand the price tag, other than the number was rather big. Maybe he should have taken Elizabeth up on her offer to teach him how to count money.

"See something interesting, pet?" The man behind him asked and Ciel nodded absentmindedly, not even noticing the alarm bells when the man stepped closer. "A fan?" The man asked curiously.

"I broke my mother's." Ciel answered simply and the man nodded with a chuckle.

"I see. Must have been an important fan for you to be staring so intently on this one." The man concluded and Ciel nodded again, again not paying attention as he attempted to make sense of the price using the addition he had been taught. So far he had concluded that the numbers on the price tag were more than fifty. Ciel suddenly felt really stupid, a feeling he truly despised. He made his decision, he would go to Elizabeth tomorrow and ask her to teach him about money.

He felt a hand snake up his back and he stiffened and jumped away. He heard the man chuckled.

"I apologize. I did not mean to startle you." He said as Ciel moved to the side away from his hand. "If it is that important, how about I give you some money to put towards buying it? Not the full price, mind you, but enough for a smart boy like you to be able to work with?" He asked and Ciel was instantly suspicious. Being able to "work" with the money meant the man would give him enough to haggle with the shop owner and probably succeed. Now, Ciel was terrible with money numbers, but he knew that the price on the fan was more than one man would give to a lost boy.

"I think I can manage. I'll just save up my weekly allowance." He said, not really believing the words coming out of his mouth. Just earlier he had wanted the money the man was clearly carrying, but all the warning signs in his head made him just want to leave the man behind, penniless. Something told him that would be safer.

"Full price then. Right now." The man insisted and suddenly Ciel understood. The man was bartering for something; he was haggling with Ciel as if Ciel was selling something.

"I'm sorry...I am afraid I do not understand." He said, backing away from the man until his back was against the wall. He cursed under his breath. He was cornered now as the man came so close the heat from his skin seeped into Ciel's clothing. The feeling was most unpleasant, like being smiled at by the person across the room no one wants to go near. The heat made him feel suddenly dirty, and Ciel began to move his hands as if he washing them without realizing it. But no matter how much he rubbed his hands, the feeling remained.

"Don't you, pet? You are a clever little thing, latching on to me like that with such a sob story, but you and I both know what you really want. Really, dear boy, all you had to do was offer straight up front. I would have eagerly paid for you." The man said and confusion marred Ciel's features for a moment.

Then it clicked. Like the being pushed through three panes of glass, Ciel suddenly understood, and the knowledge left Ciel feeling like he was naked and bleeding for the world to see. "W-wait. You think I'm a..." He trailed off, face heating up with both embarrassment and anger.

"You must get many customers with a face like that, pet." The man said, voice deepening as he grabbed Ciel's face.

Never before had Ciel felt so vulnerable. He could normally talk his way out of almost any situation and when that failed, he was quick to run away to someplace he knew would be safe. This time was different, this time the man had been leading him about. He was in a part of the domestic slums he had never been too before, there was no sign of the Red Light nearby and he could not even hear the sounds of the music that came from the brothel. He was completely exposed. He attempted to struggle away, only to find the man pinning his arms gently, but tightly. The man leaned in and began to kiss Ciel's neck and the boy hissed and struggled, cursing his small stature and refusal to accept Grell's many offers to teach him how to incapacitate a man in a bad situation. When the man bit his neck, Ciel made his protest vocal, not to mention it hurt.

The next thing he knew, the man had been pushed from him and was now laying on the ground, knocked out and money falling from his pockets. Ciel stared at him a moment before turning his head towards the direction of the attack, only to find the same pair of vermillion eyes from the day before looking him dead in the face. Ciel instantly tried to bolt, but this new man had also cut off his retreat and Ciel wondered if he'd ever be able to escape. But the man did nothing but look at him, eyes clearly waiting for Ciel to defend himself.

"I'm not a whore." Was the first thing Ciel said, his tone far more vicious than it needed to be, but he was nervous.

The man chuckled. "I assumed not, from how you were protesting earlier. A whore would not have done that." He responded and Ciel's cheeks lit aflame.

"What do you want from me?!" He snapped. "Look! Take the money the guy has and was going to pay me for services not willingly rendered! Will that buy your silence, 'cause that's all I can give you." Ciel growled.

"I don't want money." The man said and Ciel hissed at him. He chuckled again and once again Ciel felt stupid, which fueled his temper. "I have no need for money." The man stated and Ciel felt afraid again. When the man moved towards him, Ciel saw his opportunity and took it, bolting past the man and down an ally.

He'd find his own way home and probably stay inside forever.

All the loves,

Petra Jade