I feel Taye's curious gaze on me from across the table, and I wonder if she's noticed the signs that I'd been crying this morning. I shift uncomfortably in my chair at the thought, glancing idly about the space, pretending to take sudden interest in the overhead projector.
It's been at least 25 minutes since a large man in a suit escorted the three of us—Chris, Taye and I—into this small conference room.
There's coffee and tea, and a selection of cookies on a platter in the centre of the table, but I don't have the appetite to touch any of it.
Before he left, the man had informed us that the person we're meeting is running late. Nothing to worry about, apparently, because the meeting can't commence until Alexander Pierce arrives, and he has a morning meeting. Makes me wonder why they bothered summoning us here so early in the first place, and why we couldn't be trusted to drive here ourselves.
Maybe it's an execution after all.
I cast a furtive glance to my right and note that Chris is preoccupied playing scrabble on his phone.
In an effort to avoid Taye's unwavering gaze, I pour myself a cup of tea that I have no intention of drinking. Just holding the warm cup might be enough to soothe my nerves.
Do I have the obligation to tell them what I know? … But what if they're Hydra spies, planted to watch me?
No, I can't trust anyone anymore. I already decided that this morning. I clench the paper cup harder than I meant, and a sudden stab of pain bolts through me as the hot liquid spills out, stinging my hand and leaving a small puddle on the desk.
I suck in my breath, and Taye is already on her feet by the time Chris looks up from his phone.
"You should go run that under cold water, I'll help you." Taye offers, already heading to the door.
I can see that she's eager for a moment alone. What does she want to talk with me about so badly?
I follow her, looking back at Chris before I step out of the room. He's already back to his phone.
I waste no time turning on the cold water faucet when I enter the bathroom, relishing the simultaneous relief and pain that the cool liquid brings as it envelops my hand.
Taye pokes around in the first aid kit mounted on the wall, pulling out a roll of sterile dressing, which she places on the counter. Not so sterile any more.
"Sorry, I don't know much about first aid." She shrugs.
I can tell that much. I bite back the urge to say something, watching the water pour over my skin instead.
After a momentary, hesitant silence, she speaks again.
"Are… Are you dating Agent Rumlow?"
The question startles me, but I try not to show it.
"Yeah." I return my gaze to the water, unwilling to humour her with an elaborate response.
"Sorry, I don't mean to pry. I was just curious." She explains.
"Are you his ex?" I feel my jaw clench despite myself. Why would it matter if she was? I shouldn't be jealous. I'm over it. As over it as one can be when they're still actively in the relationship.
"No!" She sounds incredulous that I'd suggest such a thing, "I just saw you leaving with him yesterday when I came back to get some things I forgot."
Sensing the awkward atmosphere she's inadvertently produced, Taye fumbles over her next words.
"I overheard him talking to Dr. Jones a week ago, she asked him about you. He seem really enamoured with you." She gazes at me expectantly, waiting for my reaction.
What's she trying to get at?
"I don't think he's the type of guy to show his feelings so openly." I reply flatly. Maybe I'm being too rude, but she seems to be envious of my relationship and that bothers me. She doesn't know the truth.
Taye shrugs. She's silent for a while, and the only sound is the light hiss of the water rushing through the tap.
"Do you care about him?" She asks finally.
I grip the edge of the counter, staring down at the clear glass surface.
Yes, I still do. That's the problem.
"What are you trying to get at? Can you be straight with me? I don't know if you're chit-chatting or if you're just a spy Pierce sent to watch over me." My words come out sounding more hostile than I'd planned, but it's too late to take them back.
A small, sad smile appears on her face, and she looks down at her clasped hands.
"You know I've…. I've known Jack Rollins for probably 5 years now. He was so distant, but I thought there'd be a sweet guy under the surface. At one point I thought he might return my feelings, but he wouldn't date me."
Wait… putting aside the image of anyone crushing on that straight-faced brute, when did this become a heart-to-heart girl talk?
"He said it's better for me to stay away from him. That our ideologies don't align and he didn't want me to get hurt. I didn't know what it meant at first… but I think I know, now." She's frowning, staring at me intently. "Do you know what Project Insight is?"
Not really, but it probably has something to do with Hydra I guess. I shake my head.
"Three helicarriers equipped with long-range guns. They're using them to wipe out anyone who poses a threat—from a distance. Boom. You're gone."
"Poses a threat…" I pause, dreading the instant connection that forms in my mind. "Or has a dissenting opinion?"
She nods solemnly.
"It's launching today." Her voice is barely louder than a whisper. "That was the other thing I heard Rumlow say to Dr. Jones—that you would be safe from Insight because you're a good girl." She makes imaginary quotes in the air to emphasize her point.
"Why are you telling me this?" I try to ignore the massive feeling of discomfort growing in the pit of my stomach.
"I thought I would warn you. You have a good thing. Even if you don't love him, you should stay with it, if you don't want to get hurt." She shrugs.
"How do I know Rumlow didn't send you to keep me in check?" I cast her a wary glance, still unsure of her motives.
"Oh I don't trust Rumlow. I don't trust any of the Strike team. I don't even trust you." She gives me a pointed look, "You're right to be paranoid. But if I'm going to die because of Insight, I want to at least be able to save someone."
She walks out of the bathroom before I have the chance to say anything, and I'm left alone with my thoughts and the reflection of my frustrated expression in the mirror.
What the hell am I to Rumlow?
It doesn't matter.
I turn off the tap and begin to wrap my burn with the gauze when the intercom turns on.
"Attention all Shield agents. This is Steve Rogers."