A/N: Does anyone really care about the Kitty/Kurt storyline that is hardly a storyline? Yay or nay? Thank you guys so much for all of the reviews! I read and appreciate all of them :)

Remy's Diabolical Plan

Chapter Twenty Three: When Things Aren't So Diabolical

~X~

Was it a good idea to meet with the woman that had tried to kill her the day before? Probably not. Was it a good idea to meet this woman without telling anyone where she was going? Probably not. Rogue had been about to tell Remy where she was going (she doubted that he had heard Wanda's invitation the day before when he had been laughing so loudly.) but right when she had been about to tell him, he had said something about how he had to call Jessica because he couldn't go another day without hearing her voice.

So instead of informing him or anyone else of where she was headed, Rogue drove off on her own.

Now she was situated in a booth in Fat Bob's Malt Shoppe and chugging down an extra large chocolate chip cookie dough malt, her eyes glaring towards the entrance. This was what that Cajun had reduced her to. Angry, reckless, and taking in so many calories that she could practically hear Kitty shrieking in horror. The southerner knew that she was becoming more pathetic with each passing day. And somehow this just made her more angry with everything. Yes, anger. Anger was good. Anger was the emotion that she should always revert to. Anger was familiar and comforting. Anger was what she had built her old personality on. She could always go back to that angry Rogue.

The bell above the door jingled as the door opened to emit a woman that looked like Wanda, donned in a pair of sunglasses and a floppy hat. Rogue narrowed her eyes as she studied her. It was definitely Wanda, if the black hair streaked with red sticking out of under the hat was anything to go by. But like yesterday Rogue had an inkling suspicion that there was something different about her. Remy said that she should have noticed something...

Spotting her, Wanda stepped around to where she could see her properly.

Rogue couldn't help the exclamation that fell out of her mouth. "Holy shit, you're pregnant!"

But Wanda paid her comment no mind, casually sliding into the seat opposite her. "And you've got chocolate on your face."

Glaring with as much menace as she could muster, Rogue wiped said chocolate off her face.

"So I guess that-" Rogue pointed at Wanda's stomach, "has something to do with John."

Wanda's eye ticked in annoyance. "Maybe."

"Does he know?" Rogue used her straw to spear a piece of cookie dough. "I mean, I don't know how he couldn't. He has seen you."

"I honestly can't tell if he knows or not. But I don't think so."

Rogue chewed on the cookie dough in thought. "He is kind of a dumbass."

"Hey!" For a moment Wanda appeared to want to argue with this assertion, but then thought better of it, shrugging instead. "Yeah, he is a little bit."

"Not that I'm claiming he's not a dumbass or anything, but it is kind of hard to tell, what with the baggy clothes and all." Wanda was one of those really fortunate pregnant ladies, (Rogue thought with unreasonable annoyance) the kind that you couldn't even tell was pregnant until they turned to the side, but as long as you were seeing them straight forward you would never know they were pregnant.

"I don't want people to know." Wanda glared. "They'll start talking to me."

Rogue nodded in agreement. Finally there was someone else that hated when people thought it was a-okay to come up and randomly start long-winded, pointless conversations. Not everyone liked to socialize. Some people (the normal ones) liked to be left alone. "Can I ask how far along you are?"

"Seven months." Wanda ground out in a way that indicated that she would rather not talk about it.

"Boy or girl? Any cravings? Oh my gosh, what if it's twins?"

The scarlet haired woman looked at her in alarm. "It's not twins!"

Rogue sipped at her malt casually. "How do you know?"

"Because they checked!" she snapped. "Look, that's not why I asked you to come here. Let's not talk about it—and I rather you not tell anyone about this."

"Sure." Rogue nodded. It made enough sense to Rogue why Wanda would want to keep something like this from John. If he knew and wanted to be really involved she would feel for Wanda. That would be like having two kids. Though the honest part of her knew that if Wanda didn't eventually tell John that he had a child, someone would have to. Like say if in ten years Rogue happened to find out that Wanda STILL hadn't told him about it, Rogue would see it as her duty as a decent human being to mention something.

It would be the right thing to do.

In ten years.

"I came here to talk to you about John." Wanda started, looked highly irritated with herself for talking about any of this. "I don't know if you knew it or not before I told you yesterday, I wasn't even sure if any of that stuff in his voice mail was true, but I knew that he was only spending time with you to bother me. I don't mean to sound full of myself or anything, but he practically told me so, and I didn't want you to be into him while he was-"

Rogue's straw made a loud slurping sound. "No, I knew. He asked me to do it."

"What!"

"He did a favor for me so I was indebted to him. Actually he's only got a few more days left of the deal."

Wanda only glared.

"But if it makes you feel any better, I know how much he lov-"

Her hand came up in a halting motion to stop her. "Don't say that word."

"But he does care for you." Rogue pointed out. "He's an insane, childish, and sadistic freakshow, but if you let him he could be your insane, childish, sadistic freakshow."

The Scarlet Witch paused for a moment as if she didn't know how to respond. Then she changed the subject. "Then who were you talking about yesterday if it wasn't John? You said something like, 'back off he's mine'?"

A hot flush found it's way to Rogue's face. Of course she would remember that. Idly she wondered why Remy hadn't even mentioned it.

"That's...that's not..." her sentence dropped as her face grew hotter. Stupid Remy and his stupid irresistible-ness. If it wasn't for him she wouldn't have embarrassed herself like that.

Wanda smirked and reached for the malt. Rogue was so surprised to see an emotion on her face that didn't express some kind of anger that her distraction allowed the other girl to pull the glass out of her hand and start drinking.

"Is it the Cajun?"

Rogue startled. "No! I-"

"It's the Cajun." Wanda's eyes slid closed in pleasure as she sucked down the chocolate ice cream. "Ah."

Rogue cringed.

Wanda's eyes opened. "If you want him go get him."

"Yeah, you're one to talk." she crossed her arms and leaned back, pretty sure that Wanda wasn't going to give her ice cream back. "Besides, I can't."

"Why not?"

"He loves someone else."

Wanda's eyes rolled. "Who the hell cares?" She cut Rogue off when she opened her mouth to argue. "No, screw that other girl. You don't owe her anything. Whose happiness is more important, hers or yours?"

"...When did we become friends?"

"I asked you a question."

Rogue sighed. "Remy's happiness is most important."

Wanda's eyes were rolling again. "No," she said slowly, "it's not his either. Your happiness is the most important. At least if you tell him and he turns you down you know you can move on with your life."

But was it? Rogue sat and blinked at the other girl. She'd never thought of it that way. Would she be able to move on after that? Maybe, maybe not. But there was one thing that Rogue knew for certain. If she told Remy how she felt and he turned her down, initially she would be sad. But that sadness would inevitably turn to anger. And anger was her safety net. Anger she could live with.

She looked at Wanda pointedly. "You know, you should take your own advice."

And then to Rogue's complete surprise, Wanda's face split into a wide grin. "You're right, Rogue."

~X~

When Rogue had gone into Fat Bob's Malt Shoppe earlier she hadn't know what to expect, but it certainly wasn't anything good. Now on the drive home she was feeling happy, a bit anxious, and full of hope. Perhaps Wanda was right. It was her own happiness that she should be most concerned with. Maybe telling Remy would be the right thing, after all? But before that, she could do that other thing Wanda had suggested. Try to find out if it was two sided, maybe even just a little. And there was only one thing that Rogue could think to do to figure that out.

She was going to have to kiss Remy.

Happily she swung the car into the driveway, not even noticing that she ran over the welcome home sign.

It was with a hopeful spring in her step that she walked up onto the porch and into the house. Today was going to be a good day. If it wasn't going to be a good day, then she would make it be a good day, dammit!

The moment she stepped through the doorway, a backpack was shoved into her chest by Scott who had already donned himself in his uniform and visor. Before she could even open her mouth to ask what was going on, he was already shoving her out of the door, followed by the rest of the crew and barking orders.

"Rogue, there's been a break in the case!" Nothing could be done to hide the excitement in his voice now. "Take this bag, it's full of supplies. You and Gambit are to head over to the warehouse and stake it out. If you see anything suspicious, take them down."

"Wait-what's going on?" Rogue followed after them, grateful when Remy casually caught her elbow to stop her from falling down the porch steps.

"Gambit will fill you in. Right now Jean and I have to get to the fisherman. Kurt, go ahead and teleport over to the beach and help Kitty."

"Already on it." Kurt sent their team captain a crooked salute and a grin before disappearing.

"Where are Magma and Boom Boom?"

Jean was the one who answered. "They went shopping."

Scott very visibly clenched his jaw. "Gambit, Rogue, we'll send them your way when we make contact. Alright team; out!"

Rogue climbed into the passenger seat of the rented car, slamming the door shut behind her. "Sometimes I feel like we're in the military."

The car came to life and Remy swung it around and followed a speeding Jean and Scott down the driveway. "Sure does." he agreed with her. "S'fun, ain't it?"

"What's goin' on, anyway?"

It wasn't long before Remy had caught her up on everything. After she had come home yesterday and relayed to the team what Pyro had told her about the job he had been hired for, Jean and Scott had buried themselves in research, determined to find out exactly who 'Adam' (aka. Jeepers Creepers) really was. Their search had turned up naught until just an hour earlier. As it turned out, Adam just so happened to be the son of a fisherman. A fisherman whose name they had finally found out, but Remy mercilessly kept from Rogue as she threatened to strangle him. Once they had called this fisherman with the hope that he could shed some light on the situation, his wife had answered and divulged that they had been estranged from their youngest for quite some time.

The reason behind the breaking of traps and possible theft (it was unclear if the lobsters had been taken or just let out) was still undetermined at this point, but at least they had finally pinpointed the main 'culprit' (as Scott liked to put it). Now their team leader's plan was to quietly watch and wait for an opportunity to approach and apprehend the main culprit. Each of them would head out to the many places that Adam had been known to frequent and once he was spotted they would act.

Remy and Rogue were to head to the warehouse, stay hidden, and watch out for any signs of the fisherman's son. Rogue yelled at him almost the whole way there, as he was still holding out on telling her the fisherman's name. Finally she gave up and glared at him from the passenger's seat, her previously good mood forgotten.

The warehouse that they were headed to was about twenty to thirty minutes out of the way. If the instance came where they had to call for backup, it would be some time before they received any. Remy directed the car along the very edge of the massive parking lot, Rogue sweeping her gaze all around to make sure they weren't seen. There didn't seem to be another soul or car in sight. It wasn't long before the car was parked behind the same oversized dumpster they had parked behind the first time they had been here.

It might have been silly, but Rogue felt a tiny sort of fondness for this place, never mind that it was (supposedly) their enemy's base of operations. This is where she had realized her feelings for Remy. The last time they had been here, it had been dark and they had kept close together, Remy had been so protective of her...she had wanted so bad for him to kiss her...

Allowing her hair to fall off her shoulder, Rogue used it as a sort of shield from the man sitting next to her, her face heating at the thought of possibly kissing him again. That was what she had planned on earlier, wasn't it? Wanda's words echoed in her mind. Prompting words, confident words, simple words. If you want him, go get him. Her face felt really hot. It wasn't that she was shy, exactly. It was that she just wasn't used to this kind of stuff. There had been kisses she'd had of course, but she'd never initiated one.

Strangely, Wolverine's voice popped into her head. It was the same voice he used in the danger room during training. "You're an X-men, aren't you? Get yer act together and do it, dammit!"

This was it. She had to do it. A little puff of air forced it's way through her lips and she lifted her head and tucked her hair behind her ears. She was going to kiss him now.

Hot air rushed into the car as the driver's side window cracked open. Remy glanced her way. "You don't mind if I smoke, do ya?"

All thoughts of her 'mission' were effectively wiped from her brain. Remy's smoking habits had been a long-standing argument between them. Quitting had been a long and rough process for him but he had finally managed to kick the habit. Now for the most part he was fine. There were only two things that would set the cravings off. One thing was if he ever happened to be near someone else who was smoking and he could smell it. The other was whenever he was really, overly stressed about something.

It had started as an argument between them because he had told her the story and expressed to her how hard it had been to quit. When she told him that she wouldn't let him fall back into the habit, no matter what, she had been serious but he had only smiled and patted her on the head.

Almost two weeks later, Logan had walked by with a big cigar in his mouth. Rogue could practically hear Remy salivating as he stared after him. Once he had pulled himself together enough to tell her that he was heading to the nearest gas station in order to 'buy something', Rogue promptly punched in the face.

In retrospect, this probably could have been dealt with better. But punching him was the only thing that she could think of at that moment that would take his mind from one thing and put it on another. There was a reason that Rogue wasn't the one on the team that came up with strategies. The punching incident had turned into a big fight between them that had spurned Remy into pouting and ignoring her for three whole hours. Then they had gone to play Xbox.

Another time he had tried to start again, he had actually already bought the pack and was happily pulling one out when Rogue had snatched them from him. Not having planned anything beforehand, once again she did the first thing that came to mind. Shoving past people and through the doors of the X-mansion, she had run to the nearest bathroom and tossed them into the toilet. She would never forget the wailing NOOOOO from Remy as the death sticks swirled round and round the porcelain bowl. He had been mad for nearly four hours. Then they went to play on the trampoline.

There hadn't been any other incident where he had actually bought them again, or maybe he had the presence of mind to hide them from her. They'd argued about it many times after that, sure, but Rogue had no knowledge of him actually smoking again, up until now.

Now. Why. The southern girl could hardly believe he had chosen now, of all times to pull his crap. She'd been so close to kissing him. Now she wanted to hit him.

Forgetting to make any sort of sense so that the man in front of her could understand her anger, a strangled, helpless cry ripped from her throat about a second before she flung herself at him.

Remy's eyes widened at the sudden ferocity aimed toward him and lifted his hands up in defense, only so that they could be knocked away a moment later as somehow Rogue ended up on his lap, ripping the cigarette from his mouth and tossing it out of the open window. Forget being surprised. This was fun. A smirk pulled at the corner of his mouth as his hands halfheartedly attempted to defend himself.

It was a good thing she didn't notice either, because she probably would have killed him on the spot if she had. Instead she was busy reaching into the pocket of his pants, and coming up empty, she reached into his back pockets without a second thought.

"Rogue," he cleared his throat in a sad attempt to look awkward, but he really couldn't help feeling shamelessly delighted by the situation. "Not that Remy don't mind the molestation-" he watched as she pulled his wallet from his pocket and started throwing all of his stuff around, "-but what're ya lookin for?"

"Idiot." she growled. "Why are you doin' this to me? Why? Why?"

He stared at her, completely lost as to what she meant by those words. "What am I doin'? You're the one on top of me right now."

As if she had been doused with cold water, Rogue suddenly stopped and stared at him in shock. Normally touching him wouldn't be a big deal. But she'd never, never straddled him in a cramped car while groping his backside. The heat wave this summer had been a tough one, but Rogue hadn't really felt the affects of the temperature until now. In an instant her hands were in front of her chest as she clenched them together awkwardly.

Remy's expression only lengthened her mortification. His mouth in a smirk that exposed that dimple and eyes dancing in amusement met her flushed face. The first thing she should have done was to climb off of his lap. But that look she was on the receiving end of right now also sent a wave of familiar stubbornness through her.

She couldn't let Remy win.

This was his specialty. Getting someone so worked up and flustered that they forgot what they were doing, or forgot to argue. The man was a damn master at it.

He wouldn't win.

Dropping the embarrassed look (as well as she could manage, anyway), Rogue set her jaw in a straight line of determination.

"Where are the other cigarettes?" She managed to sound calm enough. Too bad Remy wasn't fooled. The slight furrow of his brow and the twinkle in his eye expressed to her that he accepted her challenge. Oh crap.

His voice lowered several octaves and he took on a drawl that somehow strengthened his usual accent. The sound of it caused a pleasant tingle to find it's way up Rogue's spine. "Why don't ya' keep searchin' and find out for ya self, chére?"

Really. What was she supposed to say to that? But then an idea struck her. The window was wide open. What if she were to kiss him now? Now was her chance. Her tongue darted out quickly and wet her lips. Remy's hands had found their way to the waist...how nice it felt to be held by him.

Before she could think twice about this decision, she leaned forward...and faltered to a stop when the fingers at her waist started to massage her ribs in quick, circular motions. Her face screwed up and turned ten shades redder than it had been before.

The idiot was tickling her!

The Cajun was laughing beneath her as she screamed and swatted at his hands wildly. She was going to KILL him!

"Stop...it!" she ground out between clenched teeth.

"Say you love it." He teased, his fingers moving faster up and down her ribs so that she couldn't catch them.

"No!" Twisting around did nothing to help, in her desperation she poked a finger at his stomach but there was no reaction. He wasn't ticklish at all.

Initially she hadn't wanted this to be for desperation, to be used as a tool in a battle of wills, or for any other reason other than to express her feelings for him. But at this point in time, there wasn't much that she wouldn't do to get out of this torture.

In a moment of confusion, her lips were on his. Remy's hands stopped moving. He didn't dare move, choosing only to stare, wide-eyed at the woman currently planting this kiss on him.

Rogue sighed. Not because of the tickling that had stopped. But rather because of how good this felt, how perfectly their lips fit together. The relief that spread through her chest was a nice feeling. Why had she been so nervous about this in the first place? This wasn't bad at all. Unless you counted the fact that Remy was having no reaction at all to her sudden assault.

Alarm quickly replaced the relief. He wasn't kissing her back. Oh no. This wasn't something that he welcomed, after all. As usual her mind went to the most horrible of scenarios that might result from this one, innocent kiss. Remy leaving, not only leaving her but leaving the X-men altogether. He would get on his motorcycle and somehow manage to look really cool and super dramatic at the same time and send her a look of hurt—Yes, hurt! Because she had chosen to throw their friendship out the window so that she could kiss him. She'd never be able to kiss anyone again. All that would do would remind her of him, and how sweet it was to love him.

Mulling over this rather depressing line of thought, she moved backwards. Their lips broke apart and for the first time that day their eyes locked onto one another.

It couldn't easily be explained as to why one knew what the other was thinking, just from that shared look. Neither one of them could say why they just knew.

But the wondering look that Remy held as he searched eyes asked her, "Are you sure?"

And the worried look that answered said, "Is this ok?"

A beat of silence answered and both had come to the same conclusion. Yes. The answer was yes. Rogue's heart leapt to her throat. But it was Remy who acted first. His hands were in her hair now, tilting her face so that he could get a better angle, his lips moved into hers carefully, softly, but surely.

Another little sound, akin to that of a sigh found it's way to her throat. Just like the first time all of her nerve endings were on fire. Her fingertips shook as they gripped his shoulders and twisted into the fabric of his shirt, wanting him closer. He obliged by moving his mouth a bit more forcefully against her own and she kissed him back with enthusiasm, wanting him to feel how she felt. She hardly felt the steering wheel digging into her back.

Rogue wasn't sure how long they sat kissing like that, all she knew was that his hands were everywhere. They had long since left her hair and were busy doing other things now like rubbing her earlobe in-between a thumb and forefinger, ghosting fingertips up and down the skin of her arms, moving to the back of her shoulder and massaging the muscle there, and rubbing the back of a finger over her clavicle and back again in lazy movements.

As much as it all made her shiver and sigh and want more, in the back of her mind Rogue understood that he was taking things slow with her and respecting the unspoken boundaries that she had no doubt put up. He knew her well enough to know that she never let anyone see every inch of her heart.

It was backwards, but just knowing that he respected her enough to take things slow with her, only made Rogue want him more.

Which was exactly why she climbed off of him and plopped herself back into the passenger seat.

"Whoa." Was the only word she could manage at that moment. She blinked at her lap for a moment, her mind for once completely blank. She had no idea what to do next. Rather than try to figure it out herself, she lifted her head to look at Remy, who looked flushed and was gazing at the steering wheel, seeming just as empty-minded as she felt.

Something about his kisses must have dazed her senses because at the first sight of movement outside of his window she barely thought twice about it.

An instant later something was thrown through the lowered window and the car was filling with green smoke.

Great. Just great.

To Be Continued...