Chapter 25
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"Max, I'm on my way over! I called your mom, she said it was okay if you went to Hannah's tonight." Nudge says on the other end of the line, and Max grips her phone tightly. Nudge squeezed a promise out of her earlier that day, and she was regretting it now.
"What? Come on Nudge…I can get there on my own." Max tries. If she can at least get Nudge to say she isn't picking her up, she can pretend she's going, but in reality she'll be staying in the safety of her home…watching TV…staying sane.
"Nope! See you in five!" Nudge says, and Max just lets out a dramatic moan until she hears the beep that indicates that Nudge's hung up. She curses and makes her way out of her room and down the stairs. She only just got home from school thirty minutes ago, couldn't she at least get a few hours of peace before Nudge forces her to socialize again?
She turns on the oven and puts in a frozen pizza, her mind in another place. She went to the homecoming party, but it wasn't exactly enjoyable. She was lonely and the end of the night was too much of a shock for it to be considered a positive experience. She's positive this night will be the same. She boosts herself up on the counter, facing the window so she can see the driveway. She's not sure if Nudge has a car, can Nudge even drive? Her question is answered when a familiar black Range Rover pulls into her driveway.
"Shit!" Max hisses to herself, the last exchange she shared with Fang, he kissed her cheek, and she feels embarrassed just thinking about it. Sure, she'd kissed him before, but she doesn't like to think about that. She leaps off the counter when there's a knock at the door, and pulls it open to find Nudge and Fang, Nudge squealing at the sight of her.
"Hi! I'm so excited! Also, I brought hair cutting things, because your mom talked about that too." Nudge holds up a white plastic bag with what looks like clothes. Max let's Nudge keep talking, but her eyes are trained of the plotting smile Fang is giving her. She just lets her face fall blank, moving to the side to let them in.
"Hey, Max." He says, still giving her that devious smile, and she glares back, willing herself not to buckle at the knees. Nudge grabs her elbow after Max closes the door and drags her towards the stairs.
"Fang! There's a pizza in the oven, watch it would you?" Max calls over her shoulder, watching for his confirmatory nod. Nudge all but drags her into her bathroom, taking her desk chair with her and positioning it in front of her sink. From the bag, Nudge pulls out a plastic cape.
"I know you get cold, so my mom gave me a cape from the salon." Nudge says, sweeping the cape in a dramatic motion over Max's shoulders. That's the excuse Max gives everyone but Fang for keeping the sweaters and long sleeves on.
"Thanks Nudge." Max says, and Nudge takes her comb from the countertop and starts brushing out Max's hair from where it's been laying against her scalp under her hat all day.
"Do you know what you want?" Nudge asks, and Max shakes her head. Her curly hair is uneven and around mid-back.
"Just cut it all off." Max says, and Nudge snorts.
"I'll cut it just below your chin. I'm not shaving your head, silly." Nudge says, amused, and Max grins at her in the reflection in the mirror. Nudge cuts off the ends of Max's hair to her shoulders, and begins cutting choppy layers into it, disguising the growing patch of new growth at the back of her head. Nudge never stops talking, sharing her excitement for the party, her enthusiasm for the schools cafeteria french fries, and her ride over with Fang. That makes Max start.
"Since when were you getting rides from Fang?" Max asks, and Nudge giggles and cocks an eyebrow at her in the reflection of the mirror.
"Why? Jealous of our new-founded friendship, Max?" She asks haughtily, and Max's lip curls. She is jealous of Nudge, for multiple different reasons, mostly her ability to make friends.
"Mostly you." Max says quietly, and Nudge flings her arms around Max, squeezing her hard.
"Don't say that!" Nudge scolds, and Max's fingers curl around her sweater sleeve. Max turns her head to rest her temple on Nudge's elbow, and Nudge slowly pulls away to hold Max's head and looks at her in the mirror, their faces level in the reflection.
"Max, just because I can make friends doesn't mean I'm happy, or that anyone of them really likes me. You're special because you're real with people. Your friends know that." Nudge says, and Max breaks out into a tight grimace. She doesn't want to show Nudge that she needs confirmation, but she wants it, she wants it badly. It's one thing to get confirmation from Fang, but another to get it from Nudge, who doesn't know everything about her, it's like a breath of fresh air.
"You're right." Max says, not sure what to say to that. She doesn't know if she should just be quiet, but she feels better when Nudge smiles and releases her face, her hands going back to snipping off the ends of her hair.
Nudge continues, and when she's done she picks out a sweater and jeans for Max to change into. Max pulls them on in the bathroom, arranging the sweater over the edge of her high waisted, pale blue jeans.
"Are you sure about these?" Max asks, and Nudge's face appears around the edge of the bathroom door.
"Yeah! You look so cute!" Nudge gushes, and Max's lip curls. She doesn't know if she'd call it 'cute'. The black sweater is riddled with holes around the collar and a yellow smiley face patch looks back at her from where it sits, safety pinned to her chest. The jeans have a big hole over her left knee, and she wonders if just her knee will get cold if she goes outside.
"I don't know if I'd call it cute." Max says, and Nudge snorts, dragging Max back out into her room. Max pulls on socks and grabs her phone before Nudge follows her back down the stairs. So far, she's happy Nudge only dressed her, and didn't insist on her wearing makeup or doing something stranger to her now shoulder-length hair.
"Fang! Inspect the subject!" Nudge sings, scurrying past Max and into the kitchen to where Fang's cutting the pizza. He turns, eyebrows raised, hand holding the pizza cutter hovering over it, fingers slack.
She's lovely, he'll always think she's lovely even if she changed her hair an endless amount of times or wore a face full of makeup. He swallows and forced himself not to gawk at her. She's wearing something he likes, too. She looks like she could bash his head in, and he would let her.
"Nice hair." He manages to say, and he can see her blush from where she's standing, just 6 feet away. Nudge instantly launches into speech, thanking Fang for his compliment and talking him through the process of cutting hair. He doesn't really listen, he just goes back to cutting the pizza while watching Max out of the corner of his eye. Nudge keeps talking as they wait for the pizza to cool down, and Fang is painfully aware of Max sitting on the counter by his shoulder. Something about her is making him feel very self conscious.
When it's time to go, Fang leaves the girls in the front hall to start up his car to let it warm up. He has a few minutes to himself to think before they exit and Max turns to lock the door behind her. He feels like he has something stuck in his throat, and something else in his bloodstream making him scared. He's been hanging out with Max for months, but nothing she's done has made him as scared as he is now. Maybe it's the impending possibility that he could kiss her again. That's a stupid thought, he's kissed and slept with girls before, but none of them made him feel like he was going to turn into a puddle.
When she opens the passenger side door, she offers him a smile and he feels like he's choking. Nudge and Max talk back and forth, and Fang tries not to watch Max out of the corner of his eye the whole way. His phone buzzes in the cup holder, Max picks it up, like it's a normal thing for her to do.
"Iggy's there already. Something about kicking your butt." Max says, reading the text to him. He nods and Hannah's house rolls into view. She lives in one of those developing neighborhoods with huge cream brick houses and empty lots of land yet to be developed. When he turns the music in the car down they can hear the thudding bass from the house. He's glad she lives far enough away from her neighbors for them not to get annoyed and call the cops on them. Cars are lining the curb all around the empty cul-de-sac and beyond, he puts the car in park and kills the engine.
Out in the cold, Nudge is the first to complain.
"It's so cold!" She whines, clinging to Max's arm and hiding her face from the freezing wind. Kids are littering the yard, even in the cold. Max eyes them warily and gives Fang a warning look that he doesn't catch. As they draw closer, a circle of guys calls Fang's first name and he calls back.
"Hey, I'm going to go over there. You and Nudge go inside, I'll be there in a minute." He says, and Max looks flustered, opening her mouth like she's about to ask if she can go with him, but Nudge drags her away before she can ask. Fang meanders over the frozen grass, the group is half sports guys, half normal guys. They draw Fang into their group, clapping hands and fists against his shoulders. Fang grins, slipping seamlessly into his friendly, cocky, persona. Five of them are rolling blunts, and Fang feels the uncomfortable knot in his throat come undone the further he feels he is from Max. Someone lights up and passes to him. He takes a long hit and exhales, passing it along to his left, smothering a cough.
Drugs aren't a normal thing for him, but he feels like he's coming apart at the seams, and he needs to calm down if he's going to make it through the night without having at least two anxiety attacks. He talks about soccer, and the latest Fifa game to come out. He laughs, continuing to puff and pass until he feels okay, and a little after that makes him feel heavenly.
"Hey guys, I'll catch you later." He says, and they send him off with a round of cheers. He grins over his shoulder at them and hurries towards the front of the house, almost tripping over the porch stairs. The music inside the house is reverberating up from the basement, and he dances his shoes off his feet before taking the plunge into the basement.
Instantly, he's bombarded by sound, and people everywhere shout approval at his arrival. He gives a playful bow and across the room, Max watches him with a smile. She'd been terrified when Nudge marched her down into the noisy expanse of the basement. Iggy found her as soon as she was at the bottom of the stairs. He took her under his arm, and she was calm under his wing. She and Nudge went with him to the bar, where Hannah was moving around making drinks for people, and where Iggy's friends from his History class were talking and laughing. The music drowned out their words, but Hannah approached her with a smile.
"Hey, Max right?" She said, brilliant blonde hair fell over her shoulder in waves, the diamond stud in her nose flashing in the color changing lights.
"Right." Hannah grins and leans over the polished wood bar.
"Can I get you anything?" She asks with a raised eyebrow, and Max blanches.
"I don't want to get in trouble." Max says, and Hannah laughs. It isn't malicious, but Max still feels childish for saying it.
"Don't worry, my parents will be in Bali for the next month." She says airily, and Max finds herself nodding. Hannah gives her a wide grin and her hands move to pour things into a red solo cup.
"I know we haven't met properly before, but I've heard about you from Nudge." Hannah says, and Max's eyes widen, alarmed. Hannah laughs again. Max thinks she's probably already tipsy.
"Nothing bad, don't worry." Hannah says, handing Max the cup, and she takes it. It's hard to tell in the colored lights, but it looks a little orange. She takes a experimental sip, it tastes like lipstick and orange juice, and burns on the way down, making her sputter.
"This is terrible!" Max shouts above the music to Iggy, who laughs and cheers along with his friends. His arm is back over her shoulder and Nudge slips a hand around her waist from her other side. She takes another sip, and it's less horrible the second time. She looks over her shoulder to scan for Fang, or for anyone who might be mean to her. She thinks she sees Dylan's hair somewhere across the room and whips her head back around, hunkering down at Iggy's side.
"Max, dance with me!" Nudge is pulling at her arm and Max lets her take her a few steps, before she sees where Nudge is dragging her, towards the dark half of the basement where the very bass-heavy house music is coming from, the only thing she can see is the dark forms of bodies dancing in very close quarters.
"Nope." Max says, yanking her arm back from Nudge and retreating back to Iggy. Nudge whines and follows back. Max will not be going in there, to be touched by…who knows who anyone is in there? She feels her throat close up just thinking about it, a dark, confined space, she could puke.
"Don't worry, I couldn't go in there either. My girlfriend would kill me." One on Iggy's friends says to her, and she finishes off her drink, noting dully that it's taking effect. Max flings her arm out to drape it over Max's shoulders, and the smaller girl snuggles into Max's side. She's never been drunk before, she wouldn't even say she's drunk right now, but she can't say she dislikes it. The ball of nerves above her stomach is unraveling. Hannah refills Max's cup, and she's back to nestling in Iggy's side listening to him laugh with his friends.
"Hey, I didn't know you would be here." Dylan's voice above the music makes her jump, and Nudge recoils from her. Flustered, Max tucks her hair behind her ear and turns her head up to look at him. Without Nudge learning on her, she's a little unbalanced and has to stand with her feet a little farther apart. She takes a few steps away from her friends to talk to him.
"I didn't plan on it. Nudge dragged me here." She says, and he steps closer to her, even though she's pretty sure he could hear her…
"You didn't come with Nick?" He asks, leaning closer to her. Her eyes are wide like a deer in the headlights, but he can't see that her pupils are pinpointed in the dark. She takes a sip from her cup in an attempt to appear composed. She's still confused as to how she feels for him, and she's especially muddled now with alcohol in the mix. She can't help but wonder where Fang is.
"He drove me here, if that's what you mean." She says, and his face relaxes, but only slightly.
"So are you guys together or something?" He asks, knowing full well that he's playing dirty. That's the rumor that Maya's been spreading that she was letting Fang use her. He can hardly contain his smile when she recoils.
"What? No, he gave Nudge a ride to mine and then here, It's not like that." She says, and Dylan takes to opportunity to close the distance between them, hands on her waist, pulling her closer.
"Then dance with me, Max." He whispers, leaning close to her ear, inhaling her scent, like flowers but not quite…
"Okay, hands off." An arm winds around Max's shoulders and and pries Dylan's hands off her. Dylan notices that she never raised her hands to touch him, and he feels stabbed. Fang pulls her back, and she stumbles, her back colliding with his chest. Fang smirks when he sees the dejected expression on the blonde, and it climbs higher up the side of his face when he feels Max's fingers curl into the fabric of his jacket.
"You smell weird." Max blurts, and Fang squints down at her. She's never come into contact with weed before, but realization hits her that that's what he was doing outside for so long. With his arm still firmly around her shoulder, her tips her chin up with his fingers.
His face is inches from hers, and her heart is hammering in her chest. Is he really going to kiss her right now, in front of Dylan? Is he really that childish?
"Breathe." He says, eyes fixed on her mouth, teeth grinding together. Her eyebrows draw together.
"What?" She asks, confused.
"Breathe. On my face." He says, and without thinking she does.
"Jesus, Max. Are you already buzzed?" He asks, and she holds up her red solo cup with a tipsy smile.
"Hannah gave it to me." She says, reminding him of a proud toddler. He takes the cup gently from her, finding it a quarter full.
"I'm sure she did." He says. He can't say he's happy that she's been given alcohol, it could make her so much more problematic, and she was already a walking atomic bomb to start with. He tips the cup back and drains it, ignoring the urge to spit it back up.
"Let's go." He says, moving his arm to tuck Max against his side. Dylan had watched the whole exchange with a building fury. He likes Max, he likes her a lot and she can't even touch him. When Fang passes, with Max's hands in his t-shirt he pauses.
"Don't mess with her." Fang says, in an asking tone. There's nothing threatening about it, like a parent addressing a child. Dylan lip curls and he spins, ready to just…maul Fang as he leaves, but Max's inquisitive face around Fangs shoulder stuns him. He won't be able to hurt anyone with her around, he doesn't want her to think of him that way, he wants her to think of him differently than Nick.
"Why did you let her drink this?" Fang asks, leaning over the bar to Hannah, leaving Max with Iggy. Hannah gives him a scheming grin and lines up two sets of three shots in front of him. They both take one, clink, and throw them back.
"It was her decision. She's a big kid now, Nick." She says to him, and he sneers.
"She's vulnerable." He says, and Hannah's grin grows wider. They both clink and take their seconds.
"Please. We all heard or saw her fight with Maya. No one's going to cross someone as 'vulnerable' as her to her face again. At least not anyone with half a brain." Hannah says, and Fang hisses at the taste and puts the glass back down with a clack on the polished wood counter.
"I don't think she's going to be fighting anyone wasted, Hannah, words or not." He says, looking over his shoulder to see her laughing with a hand over her mouth at one of Iggy's jokes.
"Good thing that wasn't my intentions." she says and he leans over the bar on his elbows, Hannah makes no move for the last shot.
"Has Maya been here yet?" He asks, voice low. Hannah messes with the end of her braid with a stoic expression.
"She was, but she left after a while. Didn't say if she'd be back." Hannah says, reaching for the last shot. They both put their cups back at the same time and Hannah hisses, baring her teeth.
"Thanks Hannah." He says, and she smiles at him sweetly.
"Oh, you forgive me now?" She says, and he waves her off with a smile, returning to Max's side. The taste of the shots has him nauseous, and he's already quite high. He pinches the back of his hand.
"How are you doing." Fang presses one knuckle into the outside of Max's shoulder, and she turns to face him, a delighted smile gracing her features at the sight of him. She holds her arms out and falls into him, feeling like she hasn't seen him all evening, even though she just saw him a minute ago.
"I'm okay." She says, clasping her hands behind his back so he can't escape. Okay, she must be drunk, otherwise she wouldn't be touching him. She hates physical contact, from anyone, especially him it seems. This must be the effect of alcohol.
"Are you sure?" He asks, and her face twists into a frown, jutting her bottom lip. She would be so cute if only she could focus her eyes.
"Well, I kind of wanted to dance with Nudge but I'm scared of the people over there." She says, turning her head to gesture towards the dark part of the basement with her chin. Fang's eyes follow hers, and he also frowns. He's glad she had the sense not to go in there, she'd probably be traumatized in less than ten seconds.
"Do you still want to dance?" He asks, and Max gives him wicked cut-eye. He reels.
"Not like that, dork." He says, and she smiles and nods.
"Iggy, grab your friends, we're going to dance." Fang says to him, and a shout from Iggy and all Iggy's friends are on their feet, moving into the dark side of the basement. Max is sill holding into Fang, but she's holding her own weight now. The wall of people seems to part, and they find a hole in the center, the purple fluctuating lights doing strange things to the inside of Max's eyelids and the back of her brain. In the dark, she would be scared, but she has her grip on Fang and she can feel the heat of his skin under his sleeve. He tries to talk to her over the music, but she can only see his lips move and she squints and leans closer to him, trying to hear him over the blaring music. He shakes his head and pries her fingers away from his sleeve to hold her hand in his.
Grinning, she bounces a few steps and raises her arm to spin under his, grinning and dancing with her tether to Fang. He moves in correspondence to her, not touching her anywhere but her hand. For a moment, the scenery melts away from him. The sound drains out, the room illuminates for a moment before he's sucked back into reality and he's pulling her back from crashing into a couple.
"Careful!" He tries to tell her as she falls into his chest, but he can hardly hear himself over the music. She laughs, but the sound is lost as she turns away from him to lean back against his chest. Fang's face flames.
"What are you doing?" He speaks into her ear, and she moves back against him, his hand on her hip pushing her away from him even though he wants so badly to pull her in. Her hand reaches back to find his thigh under her palm, to balance herself or to touch him Fang isn't sure.
"Do you want to dance like we're dating?" She asks, and he's mostly reading her lips at this point over the music. He stares at her like she's holding a knife to his throat, her feet refusing to stay still as she continues to sway to the music. He wants to nod and let her do whatever she wants, but at the moment he's too concerned with if she'll think he took advantage of her if he lets her. Granted, Fang knows how to grind, he could even say he's experienced, but Max is special and he's not looking to make anything weird between them.
"Please?" She says, and he nods, moving his hand from her hip and letting her turn and lean against him. Scared to touch her, Fang trails his fingertips up over her arms and over her shoulders. The song changes to a faster one and Max's dancing immediately changes with the music, leaning her head back against Fangs collarbone and reaching up to find his wrist, guiding his hand down her side to her thigh, his fingertips digging into her flesh through her jeans.
He gives up on trying to play nice with her when she reaches up again to knot her fingers in the fabric of his teeshirt, pulling at it. He wraps one arm around her waist and moves back against her, the bodies of the crowd closing in around them, a strange sense of privacy even thought they're surrounded by people. Max is boneless, convinced that it's the alcohol that's keeping her on her feet at this point. She just knew as soon as she was being led through the mess of people that she wanted to be the one who could dance with Fang like that, and his distance from her at this moment was borderline painful.
His hand claws across her stomach, his other hand holding her hip in place against him, his forehead dropped against the side of her face. She twists her hand in his shirt and moves her hips in long circles against his, his body not moving with hers, but in correspondence.
His fingers move to brush her hair away from her ear, teeth latching onto the helix of her ear, daring her to react with her body. God, he was sexy. Dark, dangerous, the tension of keeping something untamed just barely suppressed below the surface. She rolls her hips against him and he wrenches away from her, only to turn her and crush her to his chest a moment later, his thigh between her legs. She utters a drowned cry and cranes up, her lips hot against his neck, pulling his mouth down to hers. She's grabbing at the flaps of his jacket, trying to pull him closer while they move together in the sea of bodies. His tongue dips into her mouth and she surrenders to him, kissing him back as well as she knows how. She might have been intoxicated five minutes ago, but now her mind was crystal clear, and it was focused directly on Fang.
"Let's go." He growls over the music in her ear, picking her up by the backs of her thighs and shoving roughly through the crowd. Max's mouth latches onto the exposed skin of his neck, nipping a trail from his ear to his throat. He sets her down when they're back by the bar, the area now strangely devoid of people. She pulls him down again, crushing her lips to his while he swipes an unopened bottle of whiskey from the bar. She finds his hand and laces her fingers with his, letting him pull her up the stairs and out the back door into they yard. He trips over the edge of the porch stairs and hits the grass, dragging her down with him.
"Fang! The grass is wet!" She squeals, and he yanks her closer. He watches her try to twist her hand away from him and failing, opting to lie on her side in the wet grass, shivering and watching him. He props himself up on one elbow and cracks open the bottle, taking a swallow and cringing at the taste. Max inches closer to him, crossing her leg over his. She still feels the magnetic pull towards him, to want to be close, to touch him but he's pulled away. His head is lolled back, looking up at the sky, mouth half open and eyes dropping. She watches him, heart hammering in her chest, for a long moment.
"Pay attention to me." She says softly, and his head turns, blinking in the porch lights. This is a different Fang than the one at the homecoming party, he's quiet and soft, more attentive. She feels like the child, wanting to play and pull his strings. His head lolls to the side to face her.
"I am." He says, and she props herself up on her elbows, sliding the bottle out of his grasp and taking a drink of it. It doesn't burn to bad when you're already drunk, it just tastes like something you shouldn't be drinking.
"Fang, I think now, seeing as we're both intoxicated, is a wonderful time to talk." She says, and he doesn't blanch, he just smiles and blinks slowly, raising his hand to run his fingers through her hair. The air of electricity that ran between them had fizzled out in the cold outside.
"That sounds foreboding." He says, and she crawls closer, throwing one leg over his hips and straddling him, sitting up with her arms crossed in the light, one half of her illuminated in the light and the other missing.
"I'm trying to say that I like you. And I felt like it was a competition to see who would say it first, and I win." Max says, and Fang pushes himself upright, the movement feels fast to him, but to Max it's slow.
"You do?" The child is back, and he's almost confused. His pea sized ego glows a little bit, and there's a joyful squeeze beneath his sternum. Max nods, reeling to the side, but managing to balance herself with her hands on his shoulders.
"But I'm mean." He says, and Max pushes him back down onto the ground, crossing her arms over her chest and frowning at him, cute.
"You're not mean, that was a fake version of you. You're kind, and lost and you're the only one who can understand me, and I'm going to try my best to understand you." She says, fingers hooking in his shirt collar.
"I'm only nice to you." He grumbles, and she snickers, leaning down to kiss him again. She's drowning, or on fire, one of the two. They stay in the grass until she's cold and he's sleepy, and they retrieve their coats and wander back outside, walking in Hannah's expanse of a backyard, throwing rocks in the man made pond and trying to climb trees until the alcohol wears off.
Neither of them see, but Maya watches from the shadows of the veranda, vibrating mad. She can't hear anything they say, but she can't keep herself from watching them like a complete creep, smiling bitterly. She spreads that they're dating, and they go ahead and make out in the grass, like she didn't go through the trouble of concocting a lie for it to be true. She watches Max spin with her arms out, Fang trying to push her over, when she decides to go back inside before she get's nauseous. She's known Fang for two years, and never has he acted Sweet with anyone. It should have been her spinning in the starlight with Fang trying to catch her, not her socially awkward twin sister.
Maya goes back inside, slamming the door. She's going to step in on their little honeymoon one way or another, even if it gets her punched in the face again. She's going to get her guy and the upper hand again, but first, she's going to need to find Dylan.
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CONTROVERSIAL I had no clue what I was doing when I wrote this. I never went to high school parties, so tell me if this is completely inaccurate and if I need to go outside, or stay inside because I never fucking update.
-Z
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