Adaptations

Planning Ahead

Zim blinked. He then leaned forward and bonked Dib on the head again.

Dib grunted. "Dang it, Zim!" he yelled. "If we're going to do this, we're going to do it right." Dib leaned forward and connected his lips with Zim.

The kiss went on for a few moments until Zim separated from it. Dib seemed to like it a lot, chills going down his spine as he thought about the situation.

Zim, however, had a different idea of the kiss. "Blech! That's the human way of showing affection? There's so much moisture and now I have all of your Dib germs in my mouth."

"Yes, it's called a kiss," Dib said, getting pulled away from his thoughts. "And you're seriously telling me that you felt nothing from it?"

"I felt something," Zim said. He thought for a moment, his hand scratching his chin. "Hm… Zim thinks he'll need further experimentation on the matter. Do it again."

"W-what?" Dib asked, kind of confused.

"Do it again!"

"Oh… okay," Dib said. He didn't imagine how this would go down, but he didn't question it. He leaned forward and entered into a kiss with Zim again. This time it felt a bit warmer, and Dib moved his lips a bit to morph with Zim's. It lasted a bit longer until Dib eventually separated it, looking at Zim for a response. "What do you think?"

Zim blinked. He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it again. He thought for a moment before finally saying, "I liked it. A little. Just a little."

Dib put his hands on his hips and smirked. "I think you liked it more than a little," Dib said. "I know that look on your face."

"Don't make this more than it has to be, you human!" Zim exclaimed. "Just accept the fact that Zim liked it."

Dib rolled his eyes. "Fine. I'll take that." He looked around the base and said, "Well… we got what we needed to get done. What should we do now?"

"We have to prepare," Zim said. "When this analysis irken comes to check out the planet's worth, I need to be ready with all of the proper supplies."

"Like what?" Dib asked.

"Hmm…" Zim thought for a moment. "The Voot. It needs to be repaired, because we'll be briefly returning to the armada to give them a briefing on how to conquer the planet."

"And how do you suppose we do that?" Dib asked. "We never actually planned how we're going to do this. Are your ships just going to go around the atmosphere and start destroying stuff?"

"No, we can't do that," Zim said. "If what you say is correct, then we need to destroy as little of the planet's surface as possible while also eliminating the humans. We need to conserve the Earth's resources."

Dib cringed right when Zim said 'eliminating the humans'. He had no intentions of backing out, but he was still entirely uncomfortable by the idea of destroying his own race, even if it meant getting rid of those that constantly opposed him. Though… now he trusted the irken empire a bit more. "So… what did you have in mind?"

"Well, now I'm thinking that you're going to be a very good adversary in my diabolical plan," Zim said, smiling.

"… Why?"

"Your father, the scientist," Zim said. "He seems to hold the most technology out of anyone on this planet, is that correct?"

"Basically, yeah," Dib said.

"Well… in order for this plan to be a success, we need two things to happen," Zim said. "We need some of your father's heavy equipment to be wiped out, and we need to make sure that he never knows that the invasion is going to occur. This is where you come in."

Dib blinked. "Y-you want me to… destroy my dad's stuff?"

"Yes!"

He turned around. "I can't do that. That's my dad's life's work. What kind of son would I be if I just destroyed all of it?"

Zim crossed his arms. "Might I remind you that your family will be among those to be destroyed in the invasion? You did say the ENTIRE human race, and that includes them, too."

Dib gasped. "No! You can't do that. You have to allow them to come with us."

Zim shook his head. "It is not up to me, Dib. Sending one human onto an irken ship is already enough hassle for the Tallest to take, and it took a mighty amount of convincing for them to accept you to join. You were there. They aren't lenient, and they are our leaders. If they see that your father, one of the brightest minds on Earth, comes onto the armada and tries to make the mess of the place before the invasion, then things will get ugly. For him, your sister, and for both of us."

Dib looked to the ground. "Then what am I supposed to do?" he asked. "I didn't really think this through, did I?"

"Not even a little," Zim said. "And I'm sorry to say, that you have now surpassed your opportunity to back out of this. The Tallest know that you have too much information on irken culture and technology. They will not allow you to live if you show even a little bit of defiance."

"I… I…" he turned around again. "Okay."

"Good," Zim said. "We're going to have to work on your reactions in these next couple of days. You worry far too much."

"I have a lot to worry about!" Dib exclaimed.

"Yes, but Zim has to look out for his kind, too," Zim said. "So, if you would like, you can stay here for a little bit, and then head downstairs to help me with the Voot repairs. Knowing you, you probably know how to take it apart and put it back together again without a blueprint."

Dib chuckled. "Yeah… I actually do."

"Alright, then," Zim said. "It'll be nice to have an assistant that isn't stupid Gir that ruins everything." He looked around the room and then give Dib a quick kiss on the cheek before running over to the elevator and riding it to one of the lower rooms to repair the Voot.

Dib smiled. He felt that all of the pieces were coming together for him and Zim. Though… that didn't make things all that much easier for him to take.

Dib later joined Zim in repairing his ship. It didn't take very long, and Zim was able to easily add some nice attachments so he could go back and forth much faster. He was not hoping for another 6-month trip, so he wanted to make it as easy as he could.

After completing the repairs, Zim and Dib returned to the ground floor where Gir had prepared a low-quality form of nachos. Though, Dib was too hungry to complain. He grabbed a few of the chips and took a bite out of each of them.

Zim ate as well, though he wasn't as big of a fan for the cheese as Dib and Gir were. "So… you were pretty quiet while we were working. I know enough about human culture to know that that is bad. Are you feeling better from earlier?"

"You actually care?" Dib asked, curious.

"Would you rather I not?" Zim asked. "Because I'd be fine with that."

"No, no. It's okay. I'm fine with it," Dib said, munching on another nacho. "Yeah, I'm okay now. I guess I now get the chance to think this through, and well… I'm done freaking out."

"Good," Zim said. "That can't be healthy for you. Too much thought makes people's brains explode. That's why Zim doesn't think."

"Yeah, you can say that again," Dib said, chuckling.

Zim nodded, not sure what Dib was referring to. He simply dropped the subject. "But there's another reason why I asked. I still need you to go to your father's lab today if this is going to work."

"Yeah… I know," Dib said.

"No backing out alright?" Zim asked. "I can help you get in, but you know your dad's equipment more than I do."

"That's true," Dib said. "Do you want to go now?"

Zim nodded. "Yeah, the sooner we get this done, the better it would be for the both of us."

Dib sighed. "Fine… let's do this."

A half hour later, Zim managed to get Dib into his father's laboratory without too much trouble. The cameras were shut off and the guards were nicely distracted at the other side of the building.

Dib had asked Zim to wait outside, and he obliged. He was in the center of his father's many inventions. Many of them were large, and they were all fairly destructive. This was his main lab, and this was where everything was kept tight. But he knew his father far too well to let any of that stop him.

In his backpack were many small devices that he made himself. The primary use of them was to sap the energy out of any of Zim's technology, making it useless. The good thing about each of the saps was that they were small and discreet. It gave the illusion of a working machine, though it won't have the energy or capability to be destructive.

"I'm… sorry, Dad," Dib said. "But… this planet is no good. It has so many faults." Dib felt like he was slightly corrupted by Zim. A year with Zim could do that to any human, though… he finally felt that this was right. It was time for the era of humans to end.

He grabbed the bag full of saps out of his backpack and attached them to each of his father's creations, going from the bigger and most deadly to the smaller. When he felt that the most of his dirty work was complete, he grabbed a remote out of his backpack.

He hesitated for a brief moment as he looked down at it. Though… he finally gained enough courage to hit the switch on the remote. There was a whirring sound and the sound of electricity engulfed the room as one-by-one, the energy from the machines were sapped and rendered completely useless. At this point, the robots would have to be re-energized from the inside-out, or rebuilt completely. Both of which would take too long while being invaded.

Dib turned around and went over to where he entered and used it as an exit. He shut off the lights and hopped out of the laboratory where Zim was waiting.

"Did you do it?" Zim asked. "Or did you chicken out?"

Dib sighed. "Unfortunately, I did it."

Zim put his hands on his hips. "Well… look at it this way. Whether it worked or not, the armada is still coming. Would you rather it be a clean sweep across the entire planet, or would you like to be temporarily stopped by your dad's equipment while we destroyed most of the rest of the planet?"

"Yeah, you're not making it any better," Dib said.

Zim laughed uncomfortably. "Heh.. heh.. yeah. I'll be quiet now."

"Good," Dib said. "Let's head back to your house. Do you mind if I spend the night there? I don't think I can face my dad and Gaz right now."

"Yes, you can," Zim said. "I have a nice comfortable couch for the Dib-human to sleep on. Just watch out for Gir. He can be a bit of a… nuisance at night."

"I'll keep my eye open for him," Dib said, still not managing to smile. He walked with Zim back to his house. When they made it back, there was a shorter human waiting at the door. Zim was skeptical, because he was sure that he had activated the gnome security system.

"What are you doing on Zim's front porch?" Zim blurted on. "Tell me."

"Getting pummeled by your gnomes for one thing," the man said. "They put up a bit of a fight, but didn't take too long to get rid of."

Zim looked around and noticed the gnomes scattered throughout the yard, one of them completely shattered. "W-who are you?"

The man pulled out a badge. Zim grabbed it and read it.

Vale: Irken Diagnostics Officer

"Oh, you're the one who is going to analyze the Earth," Zim said, apologizing. He handed the badge back to Vale and said, "We weren't expecting you until tomorrow."

"I managed to arrive early," Vale said. "Would you mind letting me in? I need to discuss with you about a few things before I start my work. I assume you are Zim and Dib."

"That's right," Zim and Dib simultaneously.

"Let me let you in," Zim said. He entered the house and was greeted by the robot parents. He allowed Dib and Vale inside before closing the door.

Vale pressed a button on his wrist and his body fizzled out for a brief moment. He was then replaced by an irken of a similar height. He was slightly taller than Zim and was wearing a grey uniform with his strapped to his chest. "Alright, Zim. I'm going to make this brief because I would like to get to work as soon as possible."

"Yes, sir," Zim said, getting a bit excited. This was the first step for him to be an actual invader.

"Mmhmm. It is to my understanding that there is technology on this planet that will be able to detect me and my ship as I orbit around. I'll need to use your base in order to block anything that can see me while I'm analyzing the planet since my cloaking device has been damaged."

"Yes, I can do that," Zim said. "GIR!"

Gir came running down and saluted. "Yes, my Lord."

"Gir, go down and emit signals that will disrupt any signals to the Earth's space stations. We want them to be as blind as possible."

Gir smiled. "Okey-dokey." He quickly went towards the elevator and did what he was asked.

"Good," Vale said. "If I experience any issues, I will be forced to evade and move away from the planet so I avoid being noticed. Otherwise, I should have an extensive report for you and a response from the Tallest in approximately 7 hours. I'll contact you with the full details when the analysis is complete."

"Thank you, Vale," Zim said.

Vale nodded. He changed into his human disguise and left the house for his own personal ship.

Zim closed the door.

Dib looked at Zim. He asked, "So… what do we do now?"

"My least favorite thing," Zim replied. "Wait..."

"Yeah, I kind of figured." Dib yawned and stretched out his arms a little. "Um… I'm getting a little tired. It's been a long day."

"Yes, I understand," Zim said, understanding that Dib went through an incredible amount of changes all in one day. "Why don't you sleep in m-…" he thought for a moment. "On second thought, you're sleeping on the couch. I'm not human sweat all over my new sheets."

Dib rolled his eyes, but he didn't complain. "Fine. What are you going to do?"

"I think I'm going to wait for Vale to finish," Zim said. "There's no way that I'll be able to sleep with the thought of what he's going to say to me."

"Okay…" Dib sat on the couch and then lied down. "Good night, Zim."

Zim frowned. He quickly entered his room and returned with a blanket. He wrapped it around Dib and said, "Good night, Dib. Ruin that blanket and I'll claw your eyes out."

"Okay, whatever. Thank you. Good night."

The next morning, Dib was shaken awake. It was only 4:30, and it was still entirely dark outside. Dib opened his eyes and noticed Zim shaking him. "Zim?" Dib asked. "Why are you shaking me?"

"Vale's done," Zim said. "He told me that the Tallest are going to be contacting me shortly. You should be awake for it."

"Oh," Dib said. He rubbed his eyes and said, "Fine. But I'm going to be a bit tired, so I'll try my best."

"Okay, well wake yourself up," Zim said quickly. He put his hands together and shook a bit. "We can't screw this up."

Dib yawned. "Zim, calm down. Honestly, I haven't seen you this shaken… well, ever."

"Zim can't calm down!" he exclaimed. "The next transmission will determine whether or not I become an invader or a server in Foodcourtia." He grabbed Dib's jacket collar. "Zim does NOT want to go back to Foodcourtia. Two times is enough!"

Dib got out of Zim's grip and put his hands on Zim's shoulder. He was fairly awake at this point. "Zim, just wait for the transmission. If they see how buzzed you are, they're going to think you're weak. You wouldn't want that, would you?"

Zim slowly calmed his down. "No…"

"Good." Dib heard a beeping noise and turned to Zim's screen. There was a transmission coming in. "You ready for this?"

Zim nodded. He straightened himself up and then accepted the transmission. The Tallest showed up on screen and Zim and Dib saluted. "Hello, my Tallest," Zim said. Dib remained silent as he continued his salute.

"Hello, Zim," Red said.

"Vale has given us the results of your… planet," Purple said. "And Red and I have collaborated on whether or not to send you the armada."

Zim's heart began to pump faster and faster. He wanted to know, and he wanted to know right away.

"We have decided…" Red started. "That the Earth is worthy of invasion. Due to delays and other prior invasions, the invasion will take place in 3 Earth months. In the meantime, you'll have to ensure that all major defenses are down and unprepared for the invasion. Am I clear?"

Zim kept his extreme excitement in check while his Tallest were on screen. "Yes, my Tallest. Dib and I will manage the defenses."

"Good. And Dib, remember our conversation from before," Purple said. "You're now in this for the whole thing. Every irken involved in this invasion knows all about you and will not attack you… unless you show defiance. Otherwise, you'll be destroyed."

"Yes, my Tallest," Dib said.

Red blinked. "It's still weird when you say it," he said. "But whatever. We'll keep in touch, yadda yadda ya. Finally. I'm going to bed." He shut off the transmission, leaving Zim and Dib in darkness and silence.

Though, it didn't remain that way for very long, because Zim was now shaking uncontrollably. He then ran around the room with his arms spread out. "YEEEEEEEEEEEEESS!" He jumped onto the couch and started doing a little dance.

"Victory for Ziiiiim!"