I wake up the next morning with a start. As my fantasy from the night before comes back to me, I groan. Sighing, I put on my bathing suit, shorts, and a tank top and head down to the pier. The sunrise has a purple glow on its edges and stops me in my tracks for a moment. I take a deep breath and smile as the fresh mountain air fills my lungs.
"You ready?" I glance up to blue eyes and a wide smile. Peeta has already loaded the canoe for us and is waiting expectantly at the end of the pier. He is wearing a pair of trunks and a tank top, which shows off his well-defined arms.
I smile shyly at him and walk towards my usual spot in the front of the canoe. When he taught me to canoe well over ten years ago, he always took the power position in the back while I would steer up front. "Sorry I'm late," I say as he offers his hand to help me down into my spot.
My stomach jumps as his warm hand envelops mine and helps to guide me easily down into the boat. "No problem. I probably kept you up too late last night."
His statement causes my face to flush bright. If he only knew why he kept me up last night…
We set off towards the middle of the lake and fall into an easy rhythm. I smile as the canoe slices through the calm lake. I enjoy the feeling of the worn wooden paddle in my hands and the early morning air rushing against my face. We paddle for almost forty-five minutes before we make it to one of our favorite islands.
"You up for it?" Peeta calls from behind.
I look back at him and smirk. "What do you think?" He laughs as I begin to steer us towards the small beach.
I jump out and help guide the boat smoothly onto the sand. Peeta drops his paddle into the bottom of the canoe and jumps out into the water. I glance up to the cliff on the south side of the island. I hesitate, but know that we'll be swimming soon, so I reach down and slowly pull my tank top over my head. I'm left in just a pair of board shorts, sandals, and my bikini top.
When I glance up I notice that Peeta's eyes are trained on my tattoo. I trace the ink up my side with my finger and say softly, "It's a mockingjay."
He clears his throat and looks back up at me. I notice he looks more flushed than he did earlier. I look back down at my tattoo, a flaming mockingjay, starting around my bra line, curving down my ribs and ending down at my hip. "I got it a few months ago. My dad wasn't crazy about it, but I had been dreaming of it since I graduated high school."
"It's gorgeous." His voice is rough, and I notice his hand closest to me twitches. He suddenly clears his throat and pulls his tank top off as well. I notice the tattoo on his ribs and take a step closer to look.
In the center are two large hands holding two little baby feet. The writing below says, "July 7th, 2006. Annie."
"Clove and I had a baby. Her name was Anne. I…I called her Annie." Peeta's voice breaks through my thoughts. I stare up at him in shock. "She… she came too early though. She didn't make it."
"Oh Peeta." My voice is choked. "You would have been an amazing father." I feel my eyes water. I can only imagine how painful it must be to lose a child.
"Clove never wanted to have kids. Annie, she was an accident. I just loved her so much, even though I could only have her for a day." He is silent for a long moment. I reach my hand out and grasp onto his hand tightly. "After that I knew I needed children in my life, but Clove still didn't. That was really why we called it quits in the end." I nod.
"I wanted to keep her close," he adds simply, running his fingers over the ink. He gives me a half smile and says, "You ready?"
I nod and squeeze his hand one last time before letting go. We head into the trees and up a path that is much more worn than it was eight years ago. It weaves up and around the cliff, and I find myself sweating from the exertion and quickly warming summer air. We climb straight up the hill for a few minutes before reaching the edge of the cliff.
"This is much higher than I remember it being." Peeta says, his voice shaking slightly.
"I don't remember you having a fear of heights." I smile; my voice holds a teasing edge to it.
"Maybe you never noticed." He raises an eyebrow at me.
"Maybe not," I say with an edge of flirtation to my voice. I hold my hand out, "Here." He smiles warmly at me and grasps my hand. His smile and heat me deep down in my stomach. "The longer we wait, the worse it gets!" I call, jumping off the cliff and pulling him along with a hard yank of my hand.
His yell is deep and bellowing as we race towards the water. Together we slam into the lake and are quickly submerged in its depths. We separate on impact, and I pause to enjoy the feeling of the cool water around me before kicking my way up to the surface. I take a deep breath once I reach the warm air and look around for Peeta.
"Peeta?" I call and spin around. He is nowhere in sight. "Peeta?!" I call again, louder this time. I dive under the water and look for a long moment. The lake is fairly clean, but it is not very clear, so I can't see very far.
I come up and am about to yell for him again when I feel two strong arms wrap around my stomach from behind. "Gotcha!" I feel Peeta's deep voice through his chest, which my back is pressed firmly against. He grips me hard, causing me to lose my breath before he tosses me a couple feet away.
"Peeta!" I squeal as I hit the water with a splash.
As I come back up, sputtering, he calls, "That's what you get for pulling me off the cliff when I wasn't ready!"
"You do not want to start this war, Mellark," I warn him, treading water.
"Oh, I think I can take you," he says with an eyebrow raised.
I swim a little closer, and without warning I bring my arms up and down into the water, splashing him hard. He splashes me back, but I dive under and attempt to grab his arms under the water. He easily pulls me up, overpowers me, and pins my arms down to my sides. I struggle against him for a moment and get nowhere when he pulls me harder against him. It is now that I realize just how much of his bare skin is touching my own and it sends a thrill deep down to my core.
We both stop fighting at the same time. My nipples immediately harden as I register how good his broad chest feels against my breasts as I breathe in and out. His warm wet skin feels silky smooth under my hands. My breath catches as Peeta's eyes darken and he, almost imperceptibly, pulls me closer to his body. I notice several water droplets running down his chest and disappearing in the place where our bodies have melded together.
I look up into his eyes and lick my lips. He suddenly jerks away and the water feels cold against my skin where I had been pressed up against him. "Sorry," he says gruffly, diving under the water quickly and running his hands through his hair.
I gulp and take a deep breath. "We were just playing around." I keep my voice light and dive under the water and swim back towards the beach.
I take a moment to compose my thoughts. Peeta and I were always roughhousing and getting into tickle fights when I was a child. But now being so close to him has a completely different effect on me. My body is thrumming again, and I know that no amount of touching myself will satisfy the hunger he's created.
I make it up to the beach and settle myself up on the sand near the canoe to wait for Peeta. I know that he felt the chemistry between us. I remember, with a thrill, feeling his hardness against the inside of my thigh before he pulled away. I bite my lip and groan. I need to calm down before he gets back.
I avert my eyes once he comes up out of the water. If I see his tight, muscular body again my hunger will only get worse. I make designs in the sand with my finger as I hear him move over the canoe and then settle down next to me.
He places a paper bag down in front of me, and I give him a small hopeful smile before opening the bag. My grin widens as I take in the cheese bun inside. "I made them yesterday before you all showed up. I know they are better hot, but I thought you might still appreciate it."
I smile over at him and take a huge bite. He chuckles as I groan loudly in appreciation. "These are even better than I remember," I say, before taking another bite.
He starts to eat, and we sit in companionable silence on the beach together for a few minutes. The day has warmed considerably, and the lake has become much more choppy in the last hour. I know that it'll be a much more challenging ride back, but am looking forward to working out some of this frustration I am feeling.
We both stare out at the lake for while, watching the small waves lap up on the shore of the beach. "You ready?" Peeta says, standing up and holding his hand out to me. I nod and he pulls me to my feet.
We make good time on the canoe ride back and have both worked up a sweat by the time we reach the house. As Peeta and I are walking up the dock, I give into the urge to wrap my arms around his midsection and pull both of us back into the water. We both come up sputtering and laughing. He dunks me, and I tickle his feet underwater before coming back up. We spend another ten minutes playing around in the water. It feels good to cool off after the warm canoe ride. Luckily, or unluckily, we end up keeping our distance from touching each other too much, even though I am dying to wrap my arms around him like earlier.
When we finally get out, we are both happy but spent from a long morning in the water together.
"You two look like you had a fun morning!" Dad calls from the porch as we make our way up to the house.
"I really missed this place," Peeta says as he pulls his shirt up over his head. I do the same, suddenly aware of how much skin I am showing. Seeing my dad after having so many inappropriate thoughts about Peeta is making me feel guilty.
"I'm glad you came, Peeta. It's been too long. Plus, I needed someone who can keep up with Katniss. She is always critiquing my canoeing skills against yours." Peeta laughs, as I duck my head in embarrassment. "You guys up for a hike with us?" Dad questions.
"Let's do it." I say, grateful for a chance to re-adjust these insanely dirty mental images about Peeta.
I thought that a hike with my parents would help me calm down. I thought a hike with my parents would help keep these incredibly inappropriate thoughts about Peeta at bay. I was wrong.
As we were driving to the trailhead, my dad decided to use the time to catch up with his old friend. I found out that Peeta is a dedicated rock climber, and spends every Monday (when the bakery is closed) scaling rock faces within an hour's drive of the Capitol. I groan at this news, trying hard not to imagine his thick, muscular arms as he climbs. It makes sense why his hands are so rough, both from working at the bakery and climbing. I try my best not to remember how good his hands felt on my stomach when we were playing in the water this morning.
Dad, unknowingly, exclaimed that Peeta and I should go climbing together sometime. As my face burned, Peeta just glanced at me shyly and asked if I climbed too. I explained how I taught kids at the rec center near my college how to climb up the indoor climbing walls, but real life was obviously much different.
"I could show you sometime," was all he said. Imagining Peeta getting up close and personal as he showed me how to climb up rock faces kept my panties wet for the rest of the drive.
Then, on the trail head, Dad also grilled Peeta on his other hobbies, which happen to include volunteering at a local after school program for underprivileged kids (of course he does). He teaches them art and baking classes after the morning rush at the bakery and before closing up shop for the night. Because this man, apparently, feels the need to be absolutely fucking perfect in every way.
I couldn't help but watch his broad back and perfect ass as we walked. The afternoon warmed up quickly and his fitted gray shirt started showing some trails of sweat down his back. I would have never thought that sweat could be sexy until now.
Now, as we are reaching the top of the mountain, my dad has decided that I haven't had enough torture just yet.
"Peeta, how's your love life been lately? Are you still dating that girl, um, Sabrina was her name?" I walk a little faster ahead of them and pretend that I'm not listening.
"No, I'm single," Peeta says simply. I am embarrassed to realize how relieved I am.
"I could set you up, we know a couple of newly-divorced women near you, what was that one florist's name again, Nadine?" My dad questions my mom.
"Eleanor, but she is too old for Peeta," My mom chides. "She is almost 50, and Peeta is… how old are you Peeta?"
"Um, I just turned 39 in April" he says.
"Ten years isn't that big of a difference!" Dad exclaims. I snort, wondering how he would feel about a seventeen-year age difference…
"Peeta is too good looking; he should be with someone who is more youthful than Eleanor." Mom says.
Dad is silent for a long moment. "What kind of woman are you looking for? I seem to remember that you are really into brunettes with dark eyes."
My heart jumps a little in my chest, and Peeta stammers, "Um, no, not…not really."
"What are you talking about?" Dad questions as he steps over a fallen log on the path. "Clove had a dark complexion. So did your last girlfriend. And I seem to remember you having a crush on my older sister when we were growing up."
I glance back shyly and notice that Peeta's neck grows red, "That was only for a week, tops. And I was sixteen at the time."
"Yeah, it only lasted until you realized she had a girlfriend. I didn't have the heart to tell you she was gay at the time." Dad laughs. "It's too bad though, it would have been nice to have you in the family." He slaps Peeta's back. I wonder what Dad would think if Peeta were to join the family, but as his son-in-law instead of his brother. I stop suddenly in the path as I realize just where my mind has gone. How did I get from a simple crush to marriage? What the hell is wrong with me?
Unfortunately my sudden stop has surprised Peeta, who walks right behind me. "Woah," he gasps, and I feel strong hands grasp my hips as he tries to stop himself from falling. I whimper as I feel one of his fingers trail against the sensitive strip of skin between my jeans and tank top.
"Sorry," I breathe, my voice sounding strangled.
He drops his hands like he's been burned and only catches my eye for a moment before he keeps walking past me. "No problem…"
Luckily we reach the top of the mountain, and Dad quits his questions, giving both Peeta and me a break. We stop to enjoy the view and eat a snack before taking a slow stroll back down. Peeta and Dad continue catching up on the way back down, while Mom and I enjoy each others silence.
We stop at a small pub near the house on the way home to grab some dinner and where Peeta, Dad, and I argue about our favorite college basketball teams.
"Can I get you all another round?" the waitress asks as we are finishing up dinner.
"I'll get another IPA," I volunteer, taking the last sip of my drink.
"Oh, I'm exhausted, I think I might be done for the night," Mom says.
"Oh, well never mind—" I start to say.
"No! No! It is only a few minutes' walk; you should all stay if you want. I insist!" Mom argues.
I glance over at Dad and Peeta. "What about you guys?"
Peeta nods. "I could do another."
"I think I'll head back with your mom. Since you all are going to have another drink, I'll take the car back and let you both walk," Dad says.
My stomach does a somersault at the idea of staying here alone with Peeta for the evening. I glance over at him and raise an eyebrow. He grins and orders himself another drink.
"I'm glad you're staying out," I say casually after Mom and Dad leave and the waitress brings our beers.
"I'm glad to see you're a real beer drinker. Most women I know only do the sweet, frozen drinks or those terrible light beers." He grins and I stare, transfixed by his dimples for a moment.
I notice he is waiting for me to respond, and I grin back, "Yeah, well, I am my father's daughter. He was one of those parents who started letting me drink before I was 21, as long as I did it responsibly. It helped me to acquire a more defined palate than the rest of my girlfriends in college."
He nods. "I always knew he'd be a great dad."
"You don't have to tell me how lucky I am." I smile and we both take a drink. I love my dad, but I'm itching for a change in subject. I gesture over towards a dart board near our table, "You down for it?"
He raises an eyebrow at me. "Bring it on, Everdeen."
I laugh and go grab some darts from the bar. "Winner pays the tab?" I ask when I get back.
"Sure." We grab our things and head over to the dartboard. "So, besides having excellent taste in beer, and your studies obviously, what else did you do in college?" Peeta asks.
He takes a few practice shots while I take my windbreaker off. "Hmm...I played ultimate Frisbee a lot."
He laughs. "That explains why you barely worked up a sweat today."
"And like I said earlier, I worked at a local rec center." He nods as I take the darts from his hands and set myself up for the shot. "I also made some extra money at a local bar."
"Doing what?" he asks.
I hit a single-20, a triple-20 and a bulls-eye. "Taking bets playing darts." I smirk at him as his jaw drops.
"Katniss Everdeen!" he exclaims, "Are you hustling me?"
I take my time grabbing the darts and making my way back to him. He holds his hand out for the darts, and I take another step closer to him as I place them firmly in his hand. I lean closely into his side and whisper seductively, "Maybe."
He exhales, and I can feel his breath whisper against my lips. I inhale sharply and see his throat flexing as he stares at me. His scent is intoxicating and I have to fight to keep myself from closing the distance between our lips.
"I always thought you were so innocent," he whispers.
I shake my head slowly at him. "Not anymore."
He stares at me for a long moment. "Well, like I said before," he says, biting his plump bottom lip. It is all I can do to keep from groaning at his action. "Bring. It. On."
I, of course, kill him at darts. He suffers through a couple games before I offer to play a few games of foosball, which he wins, two out of three. After a few beers we decide to head out.
I am ridiculously hopeful and buzzed the entire way home, wondering if he is going to invite me into his cabin. I know it is wrong, but I want him so badly that my drunk mind doesn't care anymore. I just want him and after all of the flirting and closeness all night, I know he wants me too.
"Sorry I hustled you," I say with a laugh as we are walking.
"It's alright. You have some serious aim skills." He grins and I can feel my insides melt a little more. "Plus, it's not everyday I get a chance to buy a pretty girl a drink."
My stomach jumps again, and I feel my skin warming up. "So," I say as we make our way up the path to the cabins, "want to watch a movie? Or some Netflix or something?"
I glance over at him hopefully. He is rubbing his neck and looking uncomfortable.
"We could watch some old school Saturday Night Live on my computer," I suggest, wincing slightly at the earnestness in my voice.
He steps away from me and takes another deep breath. "Um…." he pauses for a long moment, "No, I think I'm going to head to bed."
Ice-cold rejection floods my veins, and all I can choke out is, "Oh."
His eyes are sad and we are quiet for a moment. "See you in the morning?" he asks.
I nod. "Yeah." I gulp down my embarrassment and look away from him. "I'll see you then."
After making sure the curtains are firmly closed, I collapse down on the bed with a groan. I still want him, even though he is obviously trying to fight it. I felt his excitement against me in the water today. He must be attracted to me but is afraid. I'm not sure if he is more afraid of our age difference or my father.
The more I think about it, the more my embarrassment transitions over to determination. Peeta is trying resist our attraction, but I am not going to make it easy for him. He has no idea how stubborn I can be.