John Ross and Pamela, Season 2, Episode 9 – Swimming Lessons

"It's just another part of her journey she's got to follow before she can heal." Mama Joy said, when Christopher told her in detail of Pamela's collapse. "But she's a strong girl, with a good head on her shoulders."

"Wish I could say the same for my cousin," Christopher said. "His decision making process leaves a lot to be desired."

"He's a man chased by demons." Mama Joy countered. "Plagued by the same affliction as Lot's wife. If he's not careful he's going to turn into a pillar of salt. Only a good man can have that much regret about his actions, but that regret will surely pave his way into hell if he doesn't shake it."

She asked him to keep her posted on when she could go and see Pamela. He wished he'd asked her opinion about John Ross, whether she thought he would…hurt himself. But he was too chicken to bring that question into the open.

He joined his nephews at the back table now, and saw that they had been adopted by a number of family members. People didn't leave babies in the stroller here, they had them in arms all the time.

A tall man by the name of Godwin introduced himself to him, saying, "That's my wife Lotta who's appropriated herself of your nephew there, and the little guy making faces at him is my son.

"Oh, nice to meet you, I'm Christopher, John Ross's cousin."

"Well, I'm his best man."

At the blank look on Christopher's face he asked, "Didn't he ever tell you of his wedding renewal ceremony he concocted and sprung on Pamela as a surprise?"

"No, I hadn't heard about that one."

"Aw. It was the most romantic thing I ever saw a husband do." Lotta said, with a raised eyebrow at her husband.

"Tell us the story then, Godwin," his sister insisted.

"Well, this man had a mission," Godwin began, "and he roped all the rest of us into it…"

By the time he finished, they were both laughing and teary eyed, Godwin had a knack for telling stories.

Christopher found out more about him later in a one on one. He was an engineer with the island electric company, but he also was trying very hard to build a company of his own.

"What kind of company is it?"

"It's alternative energy. We're trying to interface with some European Investors to build solar panel farms here.

"That's funny, because I'm in alternative energy too."

"No kidding, man. What kind? Wind?" Godwin asked.

"No, methane."

Godwin started laughing. "Does that qualify as alternative where you're from? It's still a fossil fuel derivative."

"Wait a second, don't laugh," Christopher said, good naturedly, "In Texas, it certainly does qualify. You try talking to the Texas oil men about it and you'll see what I mean."

That night, when everyone was tucked in for the night he called Suelen and told her the painful news.

"My God. Oh my God! Why did he do that?" she asked, about John Ross.

Christopher explained about the PTSD.

"I could kick myself," Suelen said. "I sensed there was something wrong with him and I did nothing about it." She got lost in a fog of regret. "The focus was so much on Pamela, because of the trial, I forgot to look at him. But now that I review it in my mind, I remember how melancholy he was sometimes, when he thought no one was looking. He's so much like his father in that regard. J.R. could never show anyone his weakness."

"Yeah."

"Well, we've got to find him. He shouldn't be out there all alone."

"That's what I was thinking. I've still got a few days I can stay away, and I've got to be here. But maybe if you could visit this lawyer that drew up the divorce papers. John Ross put the house in Pamela's name, set up payments into her account, so he must have set up escrow. This guy worked with him on very secret stuff, like the sensitive location stuff, so I've gotta believe he trusts him. Hopefully, he knows his whereabouts. If anyone can convince him to share them it's you, Suelen."

"Ok. I'll try my best and let you know. Tell me more about poor Pamela."

When she heard how Pamela had been harboring multiple personalities to cope with her traumas she said, "Well, some of us take to drinking and some of us create multiple personalities. It makes sense, anything to escape the pain."

"So, she's in the hospital, you say. How's this person who's helping you watch the boys?"

"Oh my god, it's like I'm playing house with this woman I don't even know." He laughed, then thought maybe that was a weird characterization. "No, she's excellent. She's a med student, and from a very trusted family of friends of theirs. She can hold down the fort. But we have to have a family member here Suelen. Can you come? I…I'm sorry but I don't think Afton is the best person for us to call."

"That woman! I'll bet she's responsible for at least one of those multiple personalities. Plus, she's got no feel for those babies. Pamela is such a good mother, I don't think she'd want her there. Plus, Christopher, she'd have to be able to keep her mouth shut. No, I think it's too big a risk. I'll talk to Bobby about my leaving. But it can't look suspicious. Oh my God. How can one family have so many tribulations?"

John Ross really hoped this wouldn't send Suelen back to the bottle. There was no one better than his aunt. She was all about giving and being there for her family. But there were things that could break her. Her son was at the core of her vulnerabilities.

In the morning, Regine said, "Let's go down to the beach."

"The beach, really? Aren't they a little too young?"

"Ha ha ha ha ha," she laughed at him. "What do you mean, too young for the beach? How can anyone be too young for the beach? We take babies to the beach from day one."

Christopher was now on the defensive, "I don't know, aren't they going to get burned? I mean… I mean, maybe you guys don't have to worry about that…but they're little white babies."

Now she stared at him and he knew he'd said the wrong thing. Was that racial, to say that?

She now took on a patient, 'I'm going to set you right' tone. "Okay. That's a misconception, all babies, whether black or white should be protected from getting burned. A little extra melanin in the skin doesn't mean we can be careless."

Christopher breathed a sigh of relief that she'd chosen not to get offended.

"But my wanting to take them on the beach is because they need fresh air, and sunshine, and fun! Just because their parents are going thru a dark time does not mean they should have to suffer."

"You're right. Let's go then."

She had everything packed, not just for an hour but for a day on the beach, complete with sandwiches and baby formula.

On that day Christopher's mind was blown. He never could have imagined that introducing his nephews to the calm Caribbean Ocean could be so much fun. The sand was absolutely white, the water as clear, and little schools of yellow and black striped fish could be seen without scuba gear. Regine and him each had a baby and they played as a foursome, making the babies kick water at each other, chase each other and look at the fish. When the time came for a feeding they retired to their blanket, which was spread under a gnarled grape nut tree.

When the babies fell asleep Christopher felt so good he dozed off too. But the movement of the woman next to him, getting up and leaving, must have woken him because he watched her walk away into the water and he couldn't believe what his eyes were seeing. She had shed the shorts and tank top she'd been wearing all morning, and which had been distracting him, and now was clad in nothing but her bikini. The neon colors against black skin, the shape of her hips, the length of her legs, the hair which she twisted into a knot. This body was an eleven on a scale of ten. He couldn't afford to miss a second of the view before him. It took his breath away. "Shish," he breathed. Men worshiped at the altar of beauty queens like this.

When she came back he faked being asleep, and turned his body face down. He was acutely conscious, though, that the body on the other end of the blanket, the babies were in the middle, was lying face up. His position soon became so uncomfortable he rose and ran to the water. He swam out as far as he could and stayed there.

"What you eating," he asked, when he finally emerged from the water. He couldn't help but notice she had put on her clothes again.

"Avocado sandwich," she smiled. "My favorite."

"Seriously, that's all you brought?"

"Are you complaining?" she asked. "Did you bring anything to share with me?"

"Nope. When you said you had sandwiches I thought you had sandwiches."

"Well, have you ever eaten an avocado sandwich?"

"I…I'll try one now," he said, "but only because there's a scary lady offering it to me and I don't dare say no."

He realized he was so hungry anything would have tasted good. "I guess it could grow on you. With a little salt."

"We consume too much salt. It's not good for you."

"You are so contrary."

She laughed, "That was the nursery rhyme they would sing for me when I was little. "Little Queen Mary, quite contrary."

Christopher smiled, "I'm picturing that. Wasn't it Miss Mary, though."

"Well that's what Regine means, queen."

Yes, I can see that. You're definitely a queen. "Shall we take the boys in the water again?" he said, to make sure he didn't stare at her.

"Yes, but first, make yourself useful. Peel the mango." She handed him a perfect red yellow fruit that must of weighed at least a pound."

"What's the best way," he asked.

"You don't know how to peel a mango?" Again, she laughed at him. "Like an orange."

"Why do you always have to be laughing at me? I'm not half as incompetent as you make me out to be," he kidded.

She now turned serious, "Christopher, there is nothing incompetent about you. The way you've stepped in here, with these little guys is amazing."

He was deeply embarrassed now. And that was probably why he did it, he shared too much. "Ah, truth is, I have a very soft spot in my heart for these little guys. I…they could've been mine."

She shook her head. He was quick to explain, "I was married to Pamela several years ago, and we were going to have twins. But they didn't make it."

"Oh. I'm so so sorry." The luminous brown eyes drew him in with their compassion.

When they went back into the water Regine said, "Watch this."

She held John Robert up facing her and slowly submerged her own head in the water several times. Then she slowly and carefully included the baby in her motion. At one moment, Christopher held his breath, the baby and Regine were both submerged and looking at each other under the water, eyes wide open. She brought him up after a few seconds and Christopher expected to hear a loud complaint. But the baby took it all in stride, as if being immersed in fluid were natural to him.

Christopher tried not to speak as loudly as his emotions. "Holy cow. That was awesome!"

"Now do it with Ross Junior."

"Naw. You do it." He switched babies with her. "I want to see his reaction first."

Ross Jr. was not to be outdone by his brother.

As they walked up the wooden stairs to the house that afternoon, they were already making plans for the next day. "You can make the sandwiches," Regine said.

"Fine. I will."

The boys went to sleep without protest, making it an early evening.

"If you want to take off for a bit, I think I can hold down the fort," he offered.

"Are you sure? I think I'll go down to my mom's."

"Yeah, bring me a meal when you come back if you don't mind," he gave her a couple of bills.

"Oh, I can come back quick."

"No, you don't have to. I'm not hungry, and I have a bunch of calls I have to make."

"What do you want me to order?"

"Surprise me," he said.

He talked to Suelen, to Bum, then to his father. Suelen was unable to get anything from the lawyer, not even the certain feeling that he knew John Ross's whereabouts', which he denied.

Bum was pretty sure he hadn't been tailed to Chicago so far.

His father had been filled in by Suelen, but had a lot of questions. He was angry, of course, at John Ross's 'lack of responsibility.' Christopher knew that it must have torn up his guts to leave her, how could his dad not see that?

Bobby was adamant that Suelen could not leave at this juncture, the FBI had been brought in and they were pressuring Bobby to make sure Christopher was back at work by the end of the week.

"Dad, this is family. I can't leave Pamela alone here. I can't leave the babies alone. What the hell do they want me to do?"

"I don't know Christopher, I don't know. But if Trevino's men start digging around looking for you then it will go bad for all of us. You've got to find John Ross and get him back home. That's the only solution. You have four days. That's it."

His dad hung up and Christopher couldn't help but say, "Damn!"

"Something wrong?" Regine asked, as she put down a package on the kitchen counter.

He turned around before he'd adjusted his face. "Naw, it's just stuff."

"Your face doesn't hide much. You look like you've lost your mother," she said.

"No. That happened when I was seven," he answered, irritated that she was so perceptive.

She didn't answer back in that smart way so he turned back to enjoy having made her speechless. She was very still, and her eyes had filled with tears. "I'm sorry," she said. "There is no greater loss. I can't…I can't even imagine it."

She pointed to the package and said. "Your dinner." And then she quickly left.

If it wouldn't have made a bigger mess than the one he'd just created, he would have picked something up and smashed it. He squashed the temptation to have a tantrum and sat at the counter with his tablet, eating dinner while he searched all the airline flights and private carriers flying in and out of St. Kitts two days ago.

He wished Regine would come back out, so that he could tell her the food she'd selected for him was amazing. Well, actually, so that he could just say he was sorry…for what? If he'd gone off on her it was only in his mind, an impulse he'd failed to restrain. He hadn't said anything rude. But some women were that sensitive, they picked up on the unspoken emotions. Gosh, he felt like an ass.

Christopher worked into the night, leaving messages for every airline he could find a contact. He was awake when the babies started fussing and started making the bottles. When she came out he had them ready.

"Do you need some help?" he asked.

"I think I'll be alright. Thank—"

"Oh-oh. I spoke too soon," they both heard the crying baby. "Here,' can you feed him while I get John Robert?" she asked.

"Sure thing," he took Ross Jr. "Here you are boy, come with Uncle Christopher."

He enjoyed the feeding, but it didn't stop his brain from extraneous thoughts. Like, when was the last time he had been in a house with a woman in a bathrobe, who wasn't related to him?

He castigated himself severely. Even the wrong look could constitute sexual harassment in this type of circumstance when the woman was an employee of his relatives and her feeling safe and comfortable was critical to her staying on the job.

When she'd fed his brother she came back out to get Ross Jr. As he put him in her arms he said, "Hey, I'm sorry about before."

She looked up and said, "Don't be silly, Christopher. You did nothing to apologize for."

He came away with a lighter heart and the faint aroma of fresh lemons.

The next morning they followed the routine of going down the stairs to the beach. It was actually an even better day than the day before, and what Regine did in the next "swimming lesson" thrilled him at the same time it terrified him.

When the baby was submerged with her, she let go of him. Christopher lunged, speechless, because he thought she had dropped the baby by accident. Her hand went up and indicated for him to stay back. Terrified, he watched, as the baby simply kicked to the surface.

"Oh my God. I didn't know you were going to do that. My heart—"

"Watch, watch, we're going to do it again."

After a good half hour, taking turns with the babies, and using her method, they emerged from the water and went to sit on the blanket. Christopher was laughing so loud he could hear it in his own ears. He probably had never laughed so loud, or been so excited in his whole life. He felt he was a little manic and high on sheer joy. "God, that was the most amazing thing I've ever witnessed."

"So, you worked very late last night," she started a conversation as he handed out the sandwiches.

"Yeah, I'm trying to find my cousin."

"Any luck?"

"None. I checked my messages this morning. He's not on any flight manifest."

"Hum." She thought about it for a few moments. "Then he must have got off the island another way. Why don't you check the ships?"

"Wow. Hadn't thought about that. You mean like cruise ships?"

"Yes, but if he was trying not to leave a trace then maybe he took a smaller boat."

"Gosh, I wouldn't know where to start looking."

"Well, I do. I have an uncle who's got a fishing boat down by the docks. He knows the boat owners. We can go this afternoon, if you like."

He knew how lucky he was, to have a local take him around to the exact people who might know the answer to his question. Walking among the friendly locals, with the babies, they got quite a few stares. Did they think this was his own little family? He'd have to be one lucky man.