New Year

by scared of clouds

Lily Evans is planning on seeing the New Year in alone, then just getting through the rest of the year with as few problems as possible. Unfortunately for Lily Evans, very little in her life is that simple. Still, what difference can a year make? 1977 through the eyes of L & J. Cover art by Viria. All Harry Potter characters, places etc are the property of JK Rowling.

2. January

A/N: Hi everyone! This was previously a fluffy one-shot that I wrote for New Years Eve, but I've decided to turn it into a multi-chap. Why you ask? Couple of reasons actually; I liked the difference between this J&L and TT's J&L and want to play with the characters a little; I like writing Jily before they're together more than when they're a couple; I feel like I want to resolve what happens between them after New Years Eve; and finally because the sequel to Turning Tables is likely to be quite dark in tone, and I can use this as my outleft for light-hearted Jily Fluff!

If you're looking for dark deeds and lots of angst, this may not be the story for you. If, one the other hand, you're looking for something lighter that includes Jily fluff, Bromance, Marauder antics and just a smidgen of angst, welcome!

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1st January 1977, 9.45pm

'Alright, what did you do to Evans?'

James lifted his tired eyes from their contemplation of the chessboard and looked up at his best mate; Sirius was frowning suspiciously at him, his eyes narrowed and arms crossed as he glowered. James closed his eyes briefly and let out a deep sigh to signal his frustration before opening them again and commanding his knight to move, leaning back in his seat and cracking his knuckles as he watched the pieces change position on the board. He gave a grim smile of satisfaction as his knight decapitated Sirius' bishop before he responded, keeping his tone even and unconcerned.

'What are you on about Padfoot? I haven't done anything to Evans.'

'Yeah?' Sirius kept his glare fixed on James and his posture stiff. 'Then why has she looked over here seven times in the last ten minutes?'

'No idea.' James smirked. 'Maybe she's admiring your hair.' Still, he couldn't help flicking a glance in Lily's direction now. He'd been trying not to pay too much obvious attention to her this evening, not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable about the events of last night, but it was hard work because his eyes always seemed to want to stray in her direction. It took a lot of effort not to look at her, and his eyes were sore from being more or less permanently trained on the chessboard as a measure to stop him from gazing at her.

'Screw you.' Sirius dropped his eyes to the board, his glare increasing as he realised that James was efficiently backing his king into a corner. James barely registered Sirius' insult as he indulged himself for a moment and just observed her. She was curled up on that same sofa again, her body angled towards the fire as she slowly turned the pages in her book. Her hair was bundled messily up on top of her head, and her overly baggy jumper had slid off one shoulder, exposing a thin strap and a patch of creamy pale skin.

Her eyes lifted from her book and darted in his direction just in time to catch him looking at her; their eyes made contact for the briefest moment before they both turned their heads back to their respective activities, the unspoken agreement not to mention this hanging in the air between them.

James' attention was brought back to the game as Sirius commanded his left-side rook to move with a curl of his lip before leaning back in his seat and huffing loudly, obviously displeased with the way the game was going.

'Do you want to do something else mate?' James asked, allowing a hint of amusement to creep into his tone. 'Because you are wheezing and grousing like my grandmother, and she's dead.'

'No, I do not want to do something else Prongs, I want you to tell me what's going on with Evans!' Sirius growled the words out, and it only served to amuse James more; Sirius became more and more like his animagus side when he was irritated, and it seemed that he was extremely wound up about this.

'There's nothing going on with Evans.' James replied absently before moving his bishop to take Sirius' rook, a move which earned him another low growl of displeasure from his best mate.

'You're a shit liar mate.' Sirius moved his knight without sparing the board more than a brief glance, obviously writing the game off as lost. 'Always have been. You'd think you'd have got better at it over the years, but no. You're as hopelessly honest as ever. It's one of your weak points.'

'I like to think of it as an admirable character trait.' James spoke absent-mindedly as he swept his eyes over the chess pieces. 'Queen to E12.'

'You keep telling yourself that.' Sirius pulled his jumper off over his head, then winked at two fifth year girls in the corner who blushed at being caught looking at him.

James shook his head at Sirius' shameless flirting. 'You shouldn't get their hopes up Padfoot. One day you'll find yourself lynched by a mob of disappointed women.'

'Never happen Prongs.' He smiled widely at the girls again, making them giggle as they whispered furiously to each other behind their hands. 'I could charm my way out of anything, even a mob of angry women.'

'Why is Padfoot being mobbed by angry women?' The amused voice of Remus Lupin came from behind James, and he turned his head to see his tall friend fold himself into the seat nearest him.

'Because he toys with their affections Moony.' James grinned at him.

'Hasn't he always done that?' Remus' face was an interesting mix of amusement and confusion. 'Why are they stringing him up now?'

James shrugged. 'I just assumed that eventually it would all come back to bite him in the arse.'

Remus laughed. 'Are you talking about karma?'

'I don't even know what that is mate.' James reached across the table and jabbed a finger into Sirius's shoulder. 'Move. We don't have the rest of our lives to finish this game you know.'

Sirius scowled. 'I'm thinking.'

'A new experience for you, I'm sure.' Remus leaned forward to examine the board and Sirius cuffed him on the back of the head in rebuke.

The echoing thump of a book being thrown onto the coffee table made all three of them jump, and they all looked over towards the fire in time to see Lily push herself to her feet and stretch, her arms raised above her head. She looked over at the three of them and smiled, then she picked her book up again and headed for the girl's staircase, passing close by their table and slowing down as she moved past them.

'Night Remus, Sirius.' They both nodded at her, and Remus added a quiet goodnight of his own, smiling at her as she drifted past his chair, but her eyes were fixed elsewhere.

'Goodnight James.'

Sirius and Remus looked sharply at their friend, who ignored them both as he lifted his eyes from the chess game to Lily's face and spoke softly in response. 'Night Lily.'

She gave him a little smile as she carried on towards the stairs, and he fixed his gaze back on the chess pieces, adamantly refusing to look either one of them in the face even though he could feel their stares boring into his skin.

'Nooo.' Sirius' voice was laden with sarcasm. 'There's nothing going on with Evans at all.'

'James.' Remus sounded flabbergasted. 'James, what did you do?'

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5th January 1977, 8.15am

'…so I told him exactly what he could do with his drink!' Marlene finished triumphantly, brandishing her spoon in the air for emphasis. 'Honestly, what is it with men? I thought maybe it was just wizards who were gits, but apparently muggle men are very much the same. They think all they need to do is buy you a drink, and your knickers will miraculously fall off. I'm swearing off.'

That got more laughter than anything else she'd said so far, and even Lily was forced to hold back the giggles a little.

'What are you lot laughing at?' demanded Marlene.

'Well sweetie, I think it's the idea of you being off men in general that's amusing to us. You've dated more than all the rest of us put together after all.' Emma spoke quietly, but her voice was laced with amusement.

'Yeah, well, that just proves my point doesn't it?' Marlene thumped a fist on the table. 'I've gone on dozens of dates, and none of them were up to much were they? Men stink.'

'Oh come on Marly, they're not all bad. You just haven't dated the right one yet.' Lily's voice sounded a little distracted, and there was a wistfulness to it that wasn't normally present; Marlene swivelled her head and took in Lily's uncharacteristic abstraction. She sat swirling her spoon in her porridge, her eyes staring off into the distance as she spoke. A quick glance at Emma and Alice showed that they had also noticed Lily's slightly unusual behaviour since they'd returned to school yesterday afternoon, but neither was likely to broach the subject out of respect for Lily's privacy; Marlene, on the other hand, had no such qualms.

'Anything you want to tell us, Lily darling?' Marlene asked, her voice a gentle purr.

Lily looked away from her contemplation of a distant wall and stared blankly at her friends. 'Like what?'

'Like exactly which males you've been associating with that have led you to believe that some decent ones still exist. And why you've been staring off into space all morning.' Marlene's smile was predatory; she was obviously expecting gossip of some kind here, and Lily absolutely could not tell her that she had spent several hours in conversation with James Potter over the last few days, and more importantly she daren't let a word about New Year's Eve slip out. She'd never hear the end of it.

So she put on her best innocent expression and smiled. 'It was more of a general observation Marly. I mean, just look around this room. There's Benjy, and Frank, Remus, Austin, Max. You can't deny that they're all nice guys, and I'm sure none of them would dream of being less than a gentleman if you were on a date with them. I'm just trying to point out that we know plenty of nice guys, you just don't date any of them.'

'She's right.' Alice's quiet voice broke in. 'We do know lots of nice guys; you should consider dating one of our friends sometime, someone you actually know a bit. But if you date Frank, I'll kill you.'

'Hmm.' Marlene didn't look appeased – she knew Lily well enough to spot that something in her behaviour was different from before Christmas break – but she did allow the subject to drop. The girls chatted about Alice's crush on Frank, about their holidays and families, and Lily smiled along and nodded and tried to ignore the little pangs in her heart whenever she thought about her family.

And she tried her very best not to look at the four boys sat just a little way along the table, the four boys she'd eaten breakfast with for the last three days while her friends had been away, who had accepted her presence without question and had done their best to include her in their jokes and conversations.

Still, she wasn't always focused on the girl's conversation, and her eyes did wander from time to time, and maybe they did land on a hazel-eyed boy with messy black hair, but so what? It wasn't as if she was looking at him.

His head turned and his eyes connected with hers very briefly, and she knew she ought to look away but he gave her a tiny grin, and she felt her face crease into an answering smile and in the end, he looked away first as Sirius called his attention to something. She turned her attention back to Emma's description of her new dress robes, and tried to ignore the appraising looks Marlene was still throwing her way.

A few minutes later Alice faltered in mid-sentence and focused her eyes at a point behind Lily's head. Realising that Marlene and Emma were looking at exactly the same spot, Lily turned in her seat and came face to face – or more accurately, face to abdomen – with James, who was smiling down at her and holding out a book.

'Thanks Lily.' He smiled at her. 'I can't say I understood all of the muggle references, but it was a good read. And I've actually finished my Muggle Studies essay ahead of time, which is a miracle. It would have taken me forever to find a muggle book to read without you.'

'Oh. Oh. Yeah, I'd forgotten…' She stuttered a little and trailed off, then started again - more calmly this time - reaching out to take her book from his hands. 'You're welcome James.'

He shot her one of those grins again, and was about to keep walking when he suddenly held up a finger and reached his hand into a pocket.

'Almost forgot.' He pulled out something small and white and held it up in the air. 'After our discussion the other day, I got to work on this; proof that I am as good at magic as I think I am. This is a ridiculously complicated combination of runes, charms and transfiguration. And it's for you.' He tossed it to her, and she caught it instinctively; he nodded approvingly. 'Good reflexes. See you in Potions.'

He turned and left the Hall, and Lily turned back to face her friends, whose facial expressions varied from puzzled to amused. To give herself a moment to think, she looked down at her hand and opened it, allowing the crumpled ball of paper to roll itself onto her palm. As she watched it, it unfolded itself until it was flat and she could read the words written on it in slanted, messy handwriting.

This will only work when you - and only you - are touching the paper. That was the hardest bit to get right. Bloody runes.

Then the sheet of paper began to fold itself in complicated ways until eventually an origami swan sat in her hand. She let out a little gasp of surprise, then set the swan down on the table. It instantly screwed itself back up into the ball of wadded up paper it had originally been; the minute she picked it back up, it began to repeat its transformation.

She let out the tiniest laugh, and looked up at her friends, eyes sparkling at the incredibly complex magic James had just handed her so casually, but she faltered when she saw the looks on their faces. All three girls were looking at her as if she'd just grown an extra head, and she realised that the interaction between her and James must have seemed odd to them; she'd momentarily forgotten everything but James' gift.

'Lily.' Alice spoke first, her voice hesitant. 'Lily, what the hell was that?'

'You called him James.' Emma's eyes were wide. 'You never call him James.'

Marlene, surprisingly enough, didn't say anything. She didn't have to. Lily knew that she would be explaining herself to her best friend before the day was out; Marlene was like a bloodhound for the truth; she could detect lies and evasions with amazing accuracy, and she'd get the truth out of Lily one way or another. Seemed like the best thing to do was give an edited account of events now, in the hope it might save her from further interrogation later.

Merlin, she was going to murder James Potter for putting her in this position, gorgeous magical swan notwithstanding.

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10th January 1977, 8.10pm

'Sorry, I'm sorry!' Lily dashed down the corridor towards Remus, who was leaning his lanky frame against the wall as he waited patiently for her. 'Completely lost track of time, I'm so totally stuck on the Transfiguration homework, and I just can't get my Arithmancy stuff right either. I'm a complete mess this week.'

Remus smiled at her frazzled state as he used one long leg to push himself off from the wall. 'First week of term. It's always fun.'

The two of them began to wander down the corridor together, talking quietly as they always did on their rounds.

Lily had always liked Remus. Always, right from first year. Even when she'd been raging at James and Sirius about Sev, she'd never included Remus in those rants. When she'd found out he was a werewolf last year, she'd only felt sympathy for a friend stuck in a terrible situation. When she complained about the more idiotic pranks that the Marauders played, she still never felt any personal antagonism towards Remus over his part in them.

She'd wondered over the last few days just what it was about James and Sirius - and James in particular – that had always somehow managed to enrage her beyond the point of rationality. She recognised that her reaction to his provocation had always been disproportionate, but she was still at a loss to explain why.

A little voice in the back of her head - that she was desperately trying to ignore - was whispering that maybe, just maybe it was because she had always had higher hopes for James. She was jerked out of her thoughts by Remus clearing his throat, and she was grateful for the distraction. For about a minute.

'So, do I get to know what's going on with you and James? Because he's being awfully tight-lipped about it.'

Lily huffed out an exasperated breath, a scowl fixing on her face as she spoke. 'Why is everyone asking me about James all of a sudden? All this week it's been "James this" and "James that", and "Lily, what's with you and James?" and I really don't know what anybody expects me to say.'

Remus grimaced. 'Sorry. I didn't mean to upset you.'

Lily felt immediately awful. Remus would never try to pry for the sake of idle gossip, she knew that; if he was asking her about this, it was out of genuine concern for a friend. And thinking about it, this must have been twice as weird for him because it involved two of his friends.

'No, I'm sorry. That wasn't fair; I shouldn't have snapped at you. I just feel like I've spent all week defending my actions to people when it's none of their damn business.'

She reached out for Remus' hand and gave it a friendly squeeze. He squeezed back to let her know it was fine and they continued their rounds silently for the next few minutes, with their fingers tangled together as they walked. The thought that had been jumping up and down for Lily's attention in the back of her mind finally made it out of her mouth, without the apparent intervention of her brain.

'If I told you about it, would you promise not to discuss it with anyone, not even James?'

Remus looked at her as he slowed his pace, his eyes focusing on hers. 'Of course. I'd never betray a confidence.'

'I know.' Lily took a deep breath. 'I know that. I just…I'm not exactly sure of what's going on myself, and I need to talk to someone independent of the whole thing, but there's no-one I could talk to who isn't going to have an opinion that I probably don't want to hear. God, that sentence didn't even make sense did it?'

'It…sort of made sense.' Remus said dubiously, obviously trying to sort it all out in his mind. 'You need to talk to someone who isn't going to try and force you to see things their way.'

'Yes! That's exactly what I meant!' Lily frowned. 'Apparently I have lost my ability to be articulate, as well as my ability to make reasoned decisions, and to think about my actions before I go through with them.'

Remus grinned. 'I'm sure you're about to explain what you're talking about. I promise to keep my opinions to myself.'

Lily took a deep breath, and began to explain. She told him about Petunia's party that she had been prohibited from attending - she'd previously told him that she'd stayed at Hogwarts for Christmas because her parents were going away and she hadn't wanted to go with them - and that led to her sulking in the Gryffindor common room on New Year's Eve. Then she described receiving her parent's letter, then James' unexpected appearance and his open and frank sharing of his family situation. Then, she came to the bit that was harder to explain; her sudden outpouring of her problems. He listened carefully and calmly, with no interruptions, and not for the first time Lily thanked the Lord for Remus Lupin and his kind and steady ways.

'It's not hard to understand Lily.' He spoke at last. 'You were upset and you needed to unload on someone, and he was available and seemed like he might understand. There's nothing wrong with sharing your problems, or with being grateful to him for giving you a friendly ear to vent to. And I know you and James have never been friends as such - though I know for a fact that neither of you have ever disliked each other as much as you've pretended to on occasion - but he would never, ever tell anyone else what you told him. If there's one thing James does well, it's keep secrets for his friends.'

'Yeah, I noticed that.' Lily answered dryly. 'I recall him flipping his lid at me last year when I called you out on your "furry little problem". He went berserk when he thought someone had let something slip.'

Remus grinned. 'Yeah, that's James. Loyal and noble to a fault.' He looked down at her and spoke reassuringly. 'If that's what's worrying you, you don't need to be concerned. He'll keep his mouth shut. Sirius has been badgering him for over a week and he hasn't budged. Your secrets are safe with James.'

'And me.' He added as an afterthought.

Lily smiled. 'Well, reassuring as that is, it's not really where my problem lies. Much as I might have hated to admit it before, I know that I can trust James. And I've never had concerns about your trustworthiness either. It's not that whole "secret family catastrophe" issue that concerns me; it's what happened after.'

Remus raised an eyebrow questioningly, and she plunged on with her story before she could lose her nerve.

'He asked if I wanted some hot chocolate, and he took me to the kitchens and we had cake and we talked and he told me funny stories, and we were laughing, and we were just about to come back to the tower when we heard the clock strike midnight.' She paused for a deep breath then blurted out the rest of it, because she needed to tell someone.

'And he wished me a Happy New Year, and he kissed me on the cheek, and I – Merlin I don't know what I was thinking – but I just turned my head, and the next thing I know I'm kissing him.'

There was a moment when silence hung between them, then Remus broke it with a strangled sort of splutter. 'You kissed James?'

'I did.'

'Voluntarily. You kissed James. You, Lily Evans, instigated a kiss with my best mate, James Potter, whom you have spent many happy hours telling me was a git.'

'He is a git. Was a git. I don't know!' Lily wailed. 'I don't know why I did it, I don't know why we're so…weirdly friendly now, I don't know what's going on. Remus, help me!'

'Me? What am I supposed to do?'

'Explain it to me.' Lily begged. 'Apparently I'm a complete emotional moron Remus, I don't understand what is going on, and that's why I can't tell anyone about any of this, because I can't explain what's going on with me and James because I don't know what's going on with me and James!' Her voice was rising steadily in pitch, and fearing an emotional meltdown of epic proportions, Remus pulled his wand out, unlocked the nearest classroom and pulled her in.

He dragged her over to a chair and crouched down in front of her as he tried to calm her down. When he was satisfied that the immediate crisis had passed he straightened up and perched on the desk in front of her.

'Why tell me?'

She looked up at him with almost tearful eyes. 'Because I knew you wouldn't laugh at me, or tell anyone else, or try and make me do anything I don't want to and I… I thought that since you're friends with me and James, that maybe you'd have a better insight than anyone else.'

Remus snorted his amusement at that. 'Please. I may be friends with both of you, but I don't understand either one of you.'

He noted her slumped shoulders and miserable eyes and he pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger as he sighed heavily.

'I can only tell you what I think. I can't tell you if I'm right.' She looked up at him hopefully, and he folded his arms and continued.

'First of all: you have never hated James. Not really. You felt like you ought to, because you were friends with Severus and they hated each other, but you personally have never hated him. And now you and Severus are no longer friends, you don't feel that you are betraying him by not hating James anymore.'

Lily opened her mouth to respond, but Remus held up one finger for silence and she promptly closed it again.

'That isn't to say you didn't dislike the way he acted sometimes, and that is perfectly reasonable. I disliked the way he acted sometimes. And you were perfectly entitled to call him out on his behaviour, and you would be completely justified in saying that he instigated the majority of your, er, disagreements. But you have to admit that he has been far less of an arrogant arse recently. Yes?'

He waited for her to nod her agreement before her continued.

'Now, because he is less of an arrogant arse, you have, in my opinion, begun to notice his good qualities because they are no longer hidden behind a layer of prickishness. And he has a lot of good qualities, many of which you yourself appreciate in a friend; he's loyal, kind, honest and obscenely clever when he can be convinced to apply himself. You have begun to appreciate that James may not be exactly how you have always imagined him to be, because you have always taken him at face value before and have never previously had the opportunity to know the James Potter that I consider one of the best friends I could ask for.'

Lily had straightened up a little in her seat as Remus had been speaking. This was good, this made sense. James had grown up a little and she was now seeing a side of him she wasn't used to seeing, and it had confused her and caused a strange aberration in her behaviour. She could deal with this.

James had done a nice thing for her – several nice things actually, between the listening, and the cake, and the funny stories to cheer her up – and she had felt compelled to do something nice for him in return, since they appeared to have become friends, so she had given him a once-in-a-lifetime, never-to-be-repeated, midnight New Year kiss. He had been in the kitchens trying to dig her out of her misery when he could have been doing something infinitely more enjoyable, so it was only fair that she offer him a friendly gesture in return.

Yes, that was it. Definitely. That made sense. She and James had begun to have more civil conversations than in previous years, and at some point they'd become friends.

She could handle friends.

Friends who'd kissed.

Best not to think about that probably.

She couldn't help but notice that Remus was watching her with a slightly concerned expression, and he looked relieved when she smiled faintly at him.

'Thanks Remus. That helped.'

He nodded slowly. 'Okay. I'm glad. I just want to say one more thing, and then I will be silent on this topic forever. Unless you bring it up again.'

She nodded at him, and he looked her straight in the eye as he spoke.

'The only person that actually knows how you feel about all this is you. Hackneyed, but true. Don't let anyone else's opinions become more important than yours. Don't try to be a certain way around James because that's what people expect; do what's best for you. Bugger everyone else.'

Lily broke out into a wide grin. 'Remus Lupin, agony aunt extraordinaire. Who'd have thought it?'

He grinned back, and judging the emotional crisis over, walked over to the door. He held it open and she rose from her chair and curtseyed gracefully before she slid out; he shut the door behind them and they headed out to continue their patrol.

'By the way.' Remus spoke quietly, glancing sideways at her. 'That last little bit of my rather spectacular speech in there? The bit about ignoring everyone else and thinking of yourself for once?'

Lily nodded as she strolled alongside him, looking up at him when he spoke. He smiled at her. 'That was pretty much stolen from a pep talk James gave me once. He's a surprising bloke, once you give him a chance.'

The two of them continued their rounds in thoughtful silence, both thinking about the same topic, but from vastly different approaches.

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20th January 1977, 7.25pm

'You're such an arse Potter.'

He'd heard the words fairly often in their years together at Hogwarts, but he didn't mind so much these days because now she was laughing when she said them.

'I couldn't help it!' He protested with a barely suppressed grin. 'It was just such a bloody temptation. The man's a complete bastard, and even you laughed when his chair suddenly started tap dancing.'

Lily grinned to herself as she stared down at her parchment and added the finishing touches to her essay, careful not to let him see the smile on her face even though she was sure that he knew it was there.

James Potter was, she had discovered, extremely good at putting a smile on your face if you gave him an opportunity to do so.

'You still landed yourself with an additional essay to do.' She did her best to make her tone just a little disapproving; she was still a prefect after all, and no matter how much of a bastard Professor MacGregor was – and privately she could admit that he was a lot of a bastard – she wasn't supposed to encourage disrespect towards staff members.

'Worth it.' James said grimly, his eyes fixed on his page but still flicking over to land on her every now and again. 'I've only had to miss this one Quidditch practice to finish it, and Padfoot can run drills as well as I can. Better, probably, since he's meaner.'

Lily snorted a brief laugh at that, and he poked her in the ribs, trying to pretend that he was annoyed with her instead of holding back laughter himself. 'Something you wanted to say, Evans?'

Her quill never stopped moving and her eyes didn't lift from the page. 'I've heard some of the team's nicknames for you, Captain, and suffice to say they think you're plenty mean enough.'

He grinned and wiggled his eyebrows at her. 'All in the name of winning the Cup darling. And flattening Slytherin.'

She shook her head, but kept her eyes glued to her page. 'Sometimes I wonder which of those is more important to you.'

James chewed the end of his quill and stared into space as he pondered the question. 'You know…it's a tough call. I think that's why I like to combine the two whenever I can.'

Lily let out another little snort as she continued to work quill over parchment. 'You're impossible.'

James grinned and leant towards her to whisper in her ear, wondering if he was about to make an error in judgement. Lily Evans could be hard to read. Still, the words demanded to be said. 'And you're beautiful, but I don't make an issue out of it now do I?'

Her head jerked up, and she immediately regretted that because she could feel her face flushing as the colour pooled in her cheeks and her quill dropped from suddenly numb fingers. He sat there grinning at her, still slightly inclining his body in her direction, one hand waving his quill languidly in the air. She remained silent for a moment until she felt sure she could speak without her voice shaking, then she straightened her spine like a good Gryffindor and spoke coolly.

'Actually, right at this minute you're doing precisely that.'

James carried right on grinning, fully aware that she was nowhere near as offended as she was pretending to be. He watched as she gathered her parchment and quill and stood up. 'And my work's done, and I need to get moving for rounds.'

She smiled sweetly as she brushed passed him. 'Enjoy finishing your essay.'

He just laughed. Laughed.

She stalked her way out of the library, muttering to herself and ignoring the odd looks she was getting. When had she lost the ability to tear a strip off James Potter when he needed it? It wasn't even that she couldn't find the words, it was that she didn't have the heart to say them.

There was something extremely off-kilter here, and she wasn't sure she liked it, not one little bit.

She had told James a slight fib in that she had plenty time before her rounds began, but she'd needed to put a little breathing space between them. Mainly so she could focus on breathing normally again. So she wandered her way towards Gryffindor Tower, completely unhurried, allowing her mind to muse on the last few weeks.

The shock of seeing James Potter and Lily Evans have extended, civilised conversations - which had been far more widespread than she'd expected over the first days of the new term - had apparently worn off now, and no-one asked her daft questions anymore, which she was sincerely grateful for, since she still had no real answers to give. But she recognised that she personally was no closer to understanding this odd new relationship she and James were forging, despite the clarity Remus had provided a week or so prior, and that was unhelpful to her state of mind.

And it was infuriating that James was completely unfazed by the sudden alteration in their relationship; or if he wasn't, he hid it extremely well. She just didn't understand how he could deal with things the way he did. She analysed and tried to separate the parts and understand every bit; she suspected that preciseness was why she was better at Potions than he was. He just looked at the whole, and decided to accept it, or not. She supposed that explained his aptitude for Transfiguration, always her weakest subject; she didn't like things that couldn't be dissected and scrutinized and understood in separate components.

Things like James Potter, who was far, far more complex a person than she'd ever realised or given him credit for. The bastard.

These thoughts carried her around a corner and straight into a tall lanky figure in black and Slytherin green.

He caught her elbow and helped her right herself before she could tumble to the ground, but then he let go of her immediately and took one step back.

'Lily.' He acknowledged her with a brief nod of his dark head.

'Snape.' She delivered his surname in frosty tones, her eyes cold and hard as she observed him. She didn't miss the slight flinch at the use of his surname rather than his given name. They'd not spoken since September; there was a chasm between them that no words could bridge now, so she simply nodded her thanks for his assistance and continued to walk towards her common room.

'Interesting company you're keeping these days.' He called after her, his voice low and without a hint of expression in it. If she hadn't known him as well as she did, she would have thought he was mocking her.

She stopped and turned slowly to face him once more, her expression carefully neutral. 'Too pure for someone like me?'

Her expression may have remained neutral, but her tone was scathing and she saw the insinuation hit and the resulting scowl spread across his face.

'No. Just odd to see you slum it with that bunch of over-confident loudmouths.'

Lily matched his angry glare and scowled straight back at him. 'Well, I've discovered that I've been horribly wrong about my assessment of some people's characters in the past, so I'm trying to be more open-minded about people I've previously judged. Turns out I should have chosen my friends rather differently.'

'Friends.' Snape curled his lip as he spoke the word. 'As if friends is what Potter is interested in. You're an idiot if you let yourself be a notch on his bedpost Lily.'

Hearing the words spoken so bluntly almost made Lily's jaw drop. Was that why people were looking at them strangely whenever she and James spent time together? Did they think she was sleeping with him?

No. Most people would accept that they had simply gotten over their…issues and developed a friendship. Most would understand that people – and their relationships with each other – could change over time. A prime example of that was stood in front of her right now.

'Interesting how you're focusing so much on my relationship with James, Snape. You aren't concerned that I'm going to jump into bed with Sirius or Remus then?' She snapped the words out, beyond furious with him for his blatant insinuations; regardless of whether she was or wasn't sleeping with James, or anyone for that matter, it was none of his business. It was nobody's business but hers, and she'd had enough of people poking their noses into her life.

Snape didn't allow the words to antagonise him, though she did note the slight tightening of his jaw; that suggested to someone who knew him well enough to spot it that he was angrier than he appeared. He spoke again through slightly clenched teeth.

'Potter is the one who's been chasing you all this time Lily. Not them. I strongly advise that you don't allow him to catch you. He's the type to get bored with his toys.' He gave her one last sneer before sweeping away towards the dungeons.

She stared after him for a moment and then turned to kick the wall, venting her fury with the world, before she turned and stomped her way towards the girl's dorm to find Marlene, and hopefully a large quantity of chocolate.

She hated January. The whole bloody, lousy, miserable month.

(J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L) (J&L)

A/N: So that's chapter 2; there should be thirteen chapters in all. Unless I get carried away and go for an epilogue as well.

I'd love to know what you think, each and every review is appreciated. Or if you'd prefer, I'm on Tumblr as scared-of-clouds where I will happily answer any message, anonymous or otherwise. There's a link on my profile.