"That is not going on BTR's next album! It is way too depressing," James exclaimed bursting into Kendall's bedroom. He had been in his room cleaning the pigsty it had become after Lucy's visit while waiting for her phone call when he heard Kendall's melancholy tune.

"Happiness is just an illusion."

"Yeah, BTR's not putting that song on the album, either." James sat on the bed next to his broken hearted best friend.

"I think we should record a good breakup song. Show the reality of life, y'know."

"We have several breakup songs in our repertoire," James said though the only one that actually came to mind at the moment was "Til I Forget About You."

"We need something to illicit a good cry."

"That one will do it." James put a hand on Kendall's shoulder. "This is about Jo, isn't it?"

"What gave you that idea?"

"Have you talked to her since this whole thing went down?"

Kendall shook his head.

"Why not?"

"I don't have anything to say to her."

"I'd say you do."

"I don't."

"Don't you want to hear her side, why she said no? I know I do."

"No."

"She didn't break up with you!"

"She said no. It's the same thing."

"I think—"

"I'm not talking to her, okay?" Kendall placed his guitar on the bed and rubbed his face. "I wish this would just all go away."

"Do you wish you never proposed?"

"I wish she never said no."

James watched Kendall's face. The boy had tears in his eyes and James could tell Kendall was trying very hard to not let them escape.

"She loves you."

"Ha!"

"Gosh, Kendall!"

"She said no. How can that mean she loves me? What if Lucy told you she didn't want to spend the rest of her life with you? Would you take that as her loving you?" Kendall spat, hot angry tears falling down his cheeks.

"If she said no, I'd want to know why."

After sitting in silence for a minute James spoke up. "Let's go out. It's just you and me. It'll get our mind off our women." Carlos was out with Alexa and Logan had flown to LA being that it was already Thursday. James had considered going with him, but Lucy would be flying out the next day to New York so his whole reason for going home (aside from working on his tan which he hated to admit was getting pale in Colorado) would be gone.

"Why do you care what's on BTR's next album? You want to quit the band anyway," Kendall suddenly blurted out.

"What did you say?"

"You. Want. To. Quit. Big. Time. Rush."

"Lucy told you?"

"She's worried about you. You're not the same, James, you have to admit."

"I—I—I—" James sighed. "Why don't we just go out, have some fun, and forget about our problems?"

"Why do you want to quit? This is your dream? I don't understand."

"I don't either. It feels like it's the right thing to do. I feel like I'm living two lives and I have to choose."

"And you choose the life without the band."

"I choose…yeah, I choose the life that God wants me to have."

"Are you sure he wants you to quit your dream?"

"Honestly, no, but I feel this is a step in the right direction."

"Maybe you should talk to someone before you make such a huge step."

"Like who?"

"I don't know, Fallon, a preacher, someone like that, I don't know."

"I don't want to abandon my friends."

"That's exactly what you are doing!"

James's phone chose that moment to ring.

"Hold on." He pulled the phone out of his pocket and answered it. "Lucy, I'm having a discussion with Kendall about what you told him. I'll have to call you back."

"You're not mad are you?"

"I don't know. We'll have to see where this discussion leads me."

"I'm sorry, James. I just felt he had a right to know."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. I'll call you back later." He hung up the phone and turned back to Kendall. "Big Time Rush can survive without me."

"We're a quartet not a trio. We don't work well when one of our pieces is missing."

"I have to do what's right for me."

"I gave up my dream for you and all you can think about is yourself. Some friend you are." Kendall stormed out of the room slamming the door behind him.

Kendall's line "Happiness is just an illusion" is from the song "What Becomes of the Broken Hearted" which is not the song Kendall was singing. He was singing something he wrote, which I did not write because song writing is not my talent (the one song I did write for this story was taken from a poem found on the internet, sigh).

Aren't James and Peta hot?! Wooo! I better be invited to the wedding (even though neither of them actually knows me)…if not for me, you two, you would not be getting a second chance… Don't forget to vote (and watch) Monday nights starting at 8PM in your US time zone. You get as many votes as there are contestants. This week there were 12 so we got 12 votes per email address, phone number, and Facebook account. Next week we should have 11. Check out the ABC website to vote or dial the number 1-800-868-3402. You get one hour after the show for phone voting and 21 hours after to internet vote! Support Team Jeta!