Saturday A.M.
(8: 23) Quick think of the most American thing you can.
(8:26) Donut hamburger wrapped in American football paper held at a pizza place while the Bill Nye theme is playing. Surrounded by American flags.
(8: 28) Thank you.
(8: 37) Sorry for late reply what did you need it for.
(8:38) I was just trying to make conversation…
(8: 39) So wyd.
(8: 40) Lying in bed.
(8:41) You?
(8:42) Arguing with my ex.
(8:43) Oh….I'm sorry….Are you okay?
(8: 45) No I am not fucking okay its like okay yay you got yourself a new bae just dont fucking rub it in my face like the backstabbing betraying bitch you are.
(8:45) Youre going to be a bitchy prick-faced snubnose for the rest of your life.
(8:46) Oh...I'm sorry...I've had ex troubles too...
(8:47) She moved away and I missed her a lot...
(8: 47) What was her name?
(8: 48) Yekaterina Braginskaya.
(8: 50) HOLY FUCK!
(8: 50) !?
(8: 51) DID SHE HAVE BIG BOOBS?!
(8: 51) LIKE REALLY REALLY HUGE FUCKING BOOBS?!
(8:52) I...! That's inappropriate!
(8: 53) I KNOW A GIRL NAMED YEKATERINA BRAGINSKAYA
(8: 53) SHE HAS KNOCKERS WORTHY OF HOOTERS
(8:54) Well...If I remember correctly, they were fairly large...
(8: 55) HOLY SHIT IM GOING TO GO ASK HER IF SHE HAS ANY PICTURES OF YOU BRB
(8: 56) No! Don't do that!
(8: 57) Lol Im kidding. I respect your privacy.
(8:58) Do you really.
(9:00) Lol nah.
(9: 01) I should have known...Please, give me the number of your ex if you wish to do so.
(9:02) Why the fuck would I do that?
(9:03) You want to talk to my ex, I want to talk to yours! I want to see how bitchy she can get!
(9:04) I am not giving you my exs number!
(9: 05) You are not gonna sext my ex!
(9:06) Do you still have feelings for her...?
(9:06) NO WHAT THE FUCK MAKES YOU SAY THAT?!
(9:07) Well...! My brother acted like this too with his ex, but they got back together because they still shared feelings!
(9:08) Sell that shit to Disney.
(9:09) Heh...Alfred has a way of making people come back...
(9:10) Sounds like he does. Tell me more about him!
(9:11) He's...Loud. A bit annoying, honestly. But I know he means well.
(9:12) Like me?
(9:12) I'm not entirely sure sometimes you mean well.
(9:13) I am a stranger. You are a stranger. I am nice to strangers.
(9:14) I find that hard to believe.
(9:15) Only you, Birdie.
(9:16) So what are you like in real life?
(9:17) Eh?
(9:17) How are you in real life?
(9:18) Well...I'm pretty shy, I guess. I kind of stutter. And nobody seems to notice me, mostly because of Alfred.
(9:19) Is Alfred a dick?
(9:20) No no! He's nice! Loud ones are noticed more than quiet ones, that's all.
(9:21) I dunno, Id prefer a quiet one.
(9:22) I would make the quiet one awesome just be being around them.
(9:23) ...Am I awesome?
(9:24) Havent decided yet. :)
(9:35) That's good enough, I guess…
(9: 41) Hello?
(9:43) Sorry my ex is being a real pain in my ass, Ive almost thrown my flute across the room.
(9:44) Not the manly flute!
(9:45) Yes indeed the manly flute.
(9: 46) Hehe :)
(9:47) Okay my friends have been dying to meet you.
(9: 48) What? Why!?
(9:49) I quote, 'I want to see why you are smiling at your crotch.'
(9:50) Are you talking about the infamous Toni and Franny?
(9: 51) The one and only Toni and Franny.
(9:52) I just dont want ya to meet them...Antonios an idiot and sometimes Francis can come off as a tiny bit perverted.
(9:53) Okay a lot perverted.
(9:54) Heh….Sounds like my cousin…
(9:55) I've got to get upto eat breakfast. Talk to you soon!
(9:55) Later.
(9:56) I want to meet him~
(9:56) he sounds really nice gil!
(9:57) i want to give him a hug! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
(9:58) There will be no hugs in this damn house.
(9:59) We're not in a house, stupide.
(9:59) why no hugs? (◕︵◕)
(10:00) Because hugs are hella gay.
(10:01) Since when have any of us ever been completely straight poles?
(10:02) buuuurn! (´ω｀)
(10:03) Mon ami your excessive use of kawaii faces are disturbing the fuck out of me.
(10:04) ಥ⌣ಥ why must you hate me child
(10:05) Hes a little bit worried about meeting you guys.
(10:06) Is he or are you.
(10:07) dont want first impressions of the future best men of your wedding to go wrong dont we!(ﾟヮﾟ)
(10:08) Dont you have an Italian to bother, Toni?
(10:09) si! ≧◡≦
(10:10) Why don't you go bother him~?
(10:11) but i wanna meet birdie!
(10:12) No one is going to meet Birdie! Why do you guys want to meet him so bad?
(10:13) because were gonna play matchmaker! (o´ω｀o)
(10:14) Honestly mon cher it's so depressing watching you sulk in the corner after You-Know-Who backstabbed you.
(10:15) VOLDEMORT?!11?! (*´д｀*)
(10:16) No, Toni. Not Voldemort.
(10:17) Who said I needed help after they backstabbed me hahahahahahahaha the relationship was toxic and we were both unhappy anyways.
(10:17) The lies you spew are great.
(10:18) Guys I appreciate it because thats what best fucking friends are for but youre getting too carried away. Im fine.
(10:19) (Not.)
(10:20) Gdi.
(10:21) You know what screw this. Later, alligators.
(10:22) nuuuuu gil dont be sad!(∩︵∩)
(10:23) Stop with the fucking emoticons!
Tuesday P.M.
(4:38) Sorry I havent texted in a few days. Got my phone taken up by the headmaster.
(10:41) Was your reputation of never getting caught flushed down the Concerning Toilet?
(10:41) I receive a text six hours later. Yes, Birdie, it was.
(10: 42) Sorry about that….Visiting hours.
(10:45) Its okay I wont interfere with your family bonding.
(10:46) Can you tell me about your cancer?
(10:47) Can you tell me about your ex?
(10:48) What why.
(10:49) Just curious.
(10:50) No.
(10:51) Why?
(10:52) Because I dont want you to hate me.
(10:53) Why would I hate you?
(10:54) Because some people are like that, Birdie.
(10:55) I promise I won't be...Whatever like that!
(10:56) Well….
(10:56) How about we do a thing?
(10:57) A thing?
(10: 58) If you can guess my favorite song and band its by, Ill tell you about my ex.
(10:59) And if you guess mine I can tell you about my cancer?
(11:00) Sure.
(11:00) But I don't mind telling you about my cancer! Honestly!
(11:01) I do mind telling you about my ex.
(11:02)...Okay then….Can I at least have a hint about your favorite song?
(11:03) Do you speak German?
(11:04) A little bit.
(11:05) Bitte-bitte kannst du mir verraten wo du her kommst.
(11:06) Thats the only hint youre getting.
(11:07) Gee, wow, thanks.
(11:08) Youre welcome.
(11:09) Now tell me about your cancer.
(11:10) Nah I think I'll actually wait.
(11:11) What!
(11:12) I'll tell if you can guess my favorite song!
(11: 13) Hint.
(11:14) Fall Out Boy.
(11:15) My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark.
(11:16) How'd you know that!?
(11:17) Bitch please, everybody loves My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark.
(11:18) Uggghhh. I'll only tell you when you tell me about your ex!
(11:19) Were just going to keep fucking dancing around this arent we.
(11:21) Yep.
(11:22) Gdi.
(11:23) I gtg see you later.
(11:24) Gn Birdie!
(11:25) Good night, Prussia.
Wednesday P.M.
(2:01) Like she fucking cares I masturbated with you.
(2:01) !?
(2:02) HOLY SHIT IM SORRY
(2:02) THIS HAS TO BE THE WORST WRONG NUMBER TEXT IN MY FUCKING MISERABLE LIFE
(2:03) I cannot unsee that text!
(2:08) BIRDIE I AM SO SORRY
(2:09) DONT HATE ME IT WAS AN ACCIDENT I SWEAR
(2:10) I believe you….I just...What the hell?
(2:11) IM TALKING TO MY EX
(2:11) IT WAS MEANT FOR THEM
(2:12) BUT BIRDIE IS RIGHT ABOVE BITCHY SO I ACCIDENTALLY CLICKED YOURS
(2:14) Why don't you change my name, Mon Dieu….
(2:15) I would but someone refuses to tell me their actual name.
(2:16) Well…..I guess I trust you enough to tell you my first name….?
(2:18) Ill tell you mine.
(2:19) You first.
(2:20) Gilbert.
(2:25) Birdie?
(2:26) I'm sorry I just….Wasn't expecting Gilbert XD
(2:27) Haha, fuck you.
(2:28) Mine is Matthew.
(2:29) Mattie? Cool name.
(2:30) Not you too!
(2:31) Alfred calls me that!
(2:32) Sorry Mattie, its too cute to not use.
(2:34) ._.
(2:35) I hope you and Alfred never meet in real life…
(2:36) I wanna meet you! Ive been kind of getting….Shoved aside the past few weeks.
(2:37) ?
(2:38) By Antonio and Francis.
(2: 38) I know they dont mean it but…
(2:39) Theyre totally in love with other people and Im just….
(2:40) Meh.
(2:41) Wow….I'm sorry, Gilbert….
(2:43) Anyways, youre awesome, Birdie.
(2: 44) :D Thanks. And can I guess your song?
(2:45) Go for it.
(2:46) Du Hast by Rammstein?
(2:47) Nope.
(2:48) Damn it.
Friday A.M.
(12: 01) Birdie.
(12:02) Mattie.
(12:02) Mattie oh Mattie.
(12:05) Where art thou.
(12:05) Thy was sleeping.
(12: 08) Oops. Sorry.
(12:09) Do not disturb thy again. Or I shall send thee to hell.
(12:10) Thou wish is granted.
(12:11) I think we messed up our 'thees' 'thous' and 'thys.'
(12:12) Ya think.
(5: 18) Are you awake yet.
(5: 20) Hello?
(5: 28) Guess Ill just go to sleep.
(8:52) Morning, sunshine.
(8:53) Why the hell did you wake me up.
(8:54) Revenge, dear Gilly.
(8:54) Dont talk to me.