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The McCall Twin

Chapter Nine – The Tell Pt. 1

So after Derek decided to go all whispery on me, I've been so whipped. Well even more whipped. Like legit, I have not thought about anything else. I keep dreaming and thinking about the kiss. Though, I was happy I couldn't help but be a little mad. I mean how long was it going to take for me to just get with him? Scott and Allison had one date and now they're dry humping already. It's not fair! What's that? What shall I do with such a predicament? Why, I shall make it freakin' come true real freakin' fast right now!

Well maybe tomorrow. It's a Supernatural marathon and my mommy and I are quite focused on the lovely Winchesters. So yeah definitely tomorrow.

As a commercial came on, Mom got up. "Alright kiddo, more popcorn and a potty break for me. Be right back."

"Ay girl, you better wash those hands before touching them kernels!" I shouted after her.

I grinned at her response. "Ay girl, you gon' eat it or you can get your lazy butt off that couch and make it yourself!" Mommy's so cool.

"Nah," I drawled. "I might pull something! You do yo thing, girl!"

"That's what I thought," She said before a door shut.

I grinned to myself foolishly then I heard vibrating. It was my phone. Only problem was that it was on the other side of the table. Grr, I don't wanna get up! So I didn't. I sat up and leaned over the table. I pushed further up. By now, I had one knee on the couch and the other on the table. Yes, I was going to do anything to get my phone without getting up. Not possible, you say? Who am I again?

I leaned more until I felt it brush against my fingers. Leaning more, I finally reached it and pushed myself back on the couch. I did it!

Just as I looked up, Mom walked in. "Extra butter?" But then she stopped as she took in my state.

I was sitting there on the couch breathing hard (wish I could say from Derek) and a bit sweaty. Yeah, you didn't believe when I said I was super weak. Last week, went to gym and couldn't even do one sit up. I wonder how many my Sexy can do. I vow to myself I will one day witness him working out. Gah! How sexy and hot and sweaty and yummy would that be. Wow, I'm getting all flustered. No, bad girl. Mom's just right there. Must resist sexy thoughts.

I opened my mouth to explain, but she held up one hand. "I don't want to know." My mouth snapped shut. "Gonna go get that buttery snack now." Then she walked back to the kitchen. Smart woman.

My phone vibrated again and I looked to see a message from Adderall Freak-a-leek. One guess who that is. I pressed 'View' and read:

You won't believe this - 187!

I texted back quickly.

I know ha-ha! It gets me every time. 'Cause 7 8 (ate) 9! Good one!

What? No, dumb shit. That means a murder.

Murder? WTH, where? Curious minds want to know!

At the video store. Dad's watching me, gotta go.

Keep me posted!

Another murder? This time I know it wasn't Scotty, but dang this Alpha dude is stirring up a lot of trouble. Dumb mutt, that's MY job. Fool thinks he can come up in MY town and screw shit up, hecks no.

Few minutes later, Mom and me were enjoying shirtless Sam walking around and eating buttery deliciousness. Sam was yum, but Derek is so much yummier and sexier and better.

"Wow," breathed Mom. "Meet your new daddy, Em." Ewwwwwwwwww.

I made a face. "Yucky mommy!"

She laughed at my expression and then my phone started ringing. It was Stiles.

I answered, "This be Em." Don't I sound awesome?

"Em," exclaimed Stiles. "Are you alone?" Why did that sound extremely dirty?

I pulled the phone away from my ear and winced. Kid had a set of lungs on him. I wonder if I do. Guess I'll find out with Sexy. ZINGER!

I glanced at Mom from the corner of my eye and saw her watching TV still. She may seem innocent, but that chick is a wizard and has freakin' ninja ears. I knew better.

"Mama," I called her. "It's Stiles. I'm a take this in the kitchen." I had a bad feeling about this…

Her eyebrows rose. "Stiles, huh?"

I nodded weakly.

"Least you're still doing it over the phone than for real," She mumbled before saying ok.

Why does everyone think we're together? And Mom keeps thinking I'm doing stuff with him. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Mom's so nasty! Could this be where my sense of mind came from? Naaaaaah, I'm way cooler.

Shaking my head, I walked to the kitchen and replied, "We're good to go. What's up?"

"There's a dead body here and you won't believe who I think found it," Stiles said.

"Well, you usually have dead bodies at a murder scene," I grinned as he retorted with a 'Shut the hell up, smart ass'. "And um… Derek?" Who else did you think I was going to say? Silly mutha-bleepers.

Stiles sighed, annoyed. "This might come as a shock to your slow, underdeveloped brain that the whole world doesn't revolve around Derek." In your world, maybe. But in mine, it's Derek all day, every day. He's sometimes naked… Cue huge grin please.

"You said guess and he's my first choice." Till death do us part. Ha, what the hell am I saying? I'll haunt Derek's sexy ass. Can't get away from me that easy.

"Yeah, but I thought you'd say Scott. I think you know that guy, your twin brother." I know who he is, silly boy.

"No, I know it wasn't Scott because he's… somewhere."

"Wow Detective, amazing job."

"I'm not his keeper." I'll gladly be Derek's. Winky face. "Blame my birth giver drooling over Sam Winchester than worrying about her only son." Yeah mommy, I done threw you under the bus mentally. How do you them apples, woman?

"What? Uh, I forgot what I was saying!"

"Way to go, Forgetful Frank."

"It's not my fault, Off-topic Olivia."

"Ok now you're entering war, Dick-munch David."

"I hope you're prepared for defeat, Asshole Amanda."

"Wow you think you're actually gonna win, Shit face Shane. How cute."

"Yeah well-," Stiles was cut off by a voice I got reprimanded for so many times. "Stiles, who are you on the phone with?" Padre Stilinski.

"Uh," drawled Stiles. "No one?" Terrible Tim sucks at lying. Woo, burn!

"Yeah right," Padre said. "Which one is it? Scott or Emily?" Wow, he's good. He should be a cop.

"Wha? You're crazy, daddy-o." Play dumb, Stiles. That should be easy for you. Ha-ha twice in a row!

"Sure, I'm gonna take a wild guess," There was some scuffling and then Padre spoke in my ear. "Emily?"

Busted… or not. "Emily? No this is… Lily. Yeah, Lily." Time for my alias. "Lily Evans."

Padre Stilinski sounded amused. "Oh excuse me, Lily. I was just wondering where Emily was to tell her she's won a prize." I'm so slick- wait prize?

"Prize? What prize?"

"Oh, I'm sorry Lily. I can only tell Emily McCall." No!

"No, don't fall for it," Stiles screamed in the background. "Stay above, stay gold!"

"No, you misunderstood me! I am Emily McCall. It's me, Padre Stilinski! Best friend to your son! Twin sister to Scott!" I shouted giddily. "What's the prize?"

"Oh Emily, hello," Padre said. "Your prize is that you get to hear it from your mother after I tell her you are following my son on my calls."

"And you didn't listen! Awesome!"

"But I didn't…" It hit me. "Oh, you're one Sneaky Sheriff. If I hang up right now, can you not tell my mama?"

"No more calls or texts. Understood Emily?" SUCCESS.

I nodded even though he couldn't see me. "Yes, Padre Stilinski, understood. But quick favor, can you tell your son 'I won the war, boo-yah!' And don't forget the 'boo-yah'. Thanks and bye!" I hung up before he could question or protest.

Wow, I'm so BOO-YAH.

-X-

Skip, skip. Breathe. Skip, skip. Breathe. Skip, Skip.

I stopped my process as I passed by this ugly, loving couple. Then I made my way over to them. I ruffled twin's hair and grinned at Allison. "Happy Day of Birth, Ally!"

Allison smiled, but looked around frantically.

I raised an eyebrow and asked, "Paranoid, Al?"

"Uh," She chuckled. "You could say that. I kind of don't want anyone to know about my birthday. Speaking of which, how did you even find out?"

I shrugged. "Lydia texted me." Then I thought about it. "Wait, how did she get my number?" I looked at Ally.

Allison shook her head and raised her hands in defense. "Don't look at me. I never gave her your number."

"Mm," I rubbed my chin in a smart fashion. "Well, it seems like a mystery! One I shall solve!" I shouted before lowering my voice. "Have a good day of birth, Ally. Love you." Then I turned to Scott. "Behave mister and make her b-day on to remember, but not monumental." I winked at them.

They both blushed, but Scott pushed me away with his wolfy hand. "Get out of here, you freak."

"Why, I never," I gasped before kicking his shin and running off. I stuck my tongue out at him and grinned at Allison. Then I took off to my Chemistry class.

Mr. Harris, here I come!

-X-

"Just a friendly reminder, parent teacher conferences are tonight. Students below a C average are required to attend. Ducking will not make it go away, Ms. McCall." I gave him a toothy grin. "I won't name anymore because the shame and self-disgust should be more than enough punishment." Self-disgust? Please home biscuit be straight trippin'. "Now has anyone seen Scott McCall?"

Scott McCall? Do I know him? Oh! Scotty, duh! Where is that freak? I just saw him with Ally-bear.

The sound of a door opening made me look up. It was Jackson.

Oh cha, Stiles ended up telling me everything when we got to school. Hey, Padre Stilinski said no calls or texts. He never said anything about talking in person. Anyways, it turns out the people who found said body (We're assuming) were Lydia and the jackass himself. Yeah, I was shocked. And even when Lydia had texted me she didn't seem off or anything. Eh, I don't know. Back to Harris 'cause he's glaring at me. I think I missed something.

"Ms. McCall, tell me what you didn't understand about getting your book out and reading chapter 9?" He asked me sternly.

"Uh, everything."

"And that, Ms. McCall, is why you're coming tonight."

I cheered. "Yay, that means more time with you!"

He rolled his eyes as the class laughed. But I guess he was done trying to mess with me because he turned back to his desk. So he wasn't done messing just done with messing with me 'cause now he was picking on Stiles, my boy.

"Mr. Stilinski, try putting the highlighter down between paragraphs. It's Chemistry not a coloring book."

The class chuckled while I yelled, "Stiles, would you like some aloe vera? 'Cause you done been burned! OH!"

As the class laughed, Stiles flipped me off before shooting his highlighter cap out of his mouth and catching it in his hand. I had to admit that was cool, but I'm cooler. I grinned at him and turned back around.

I sat there doodling in my journal. I kept writing 'Mrs. Derek Hale' or 'Emily Hale'. Yeah, it's a little elementary, but who gives a crap? It makes me all tingly inside. I can't believe I'm saying this, but not in the nasty way. Shocking right? I mean yes sometimes it's extremely nasty (GRIN), but right now it's just those horny butterflies at it again.

My pen slid all crazy as I jumped. I spun my head around (sounded nasty!) and saw Stiles had fallen from his chair and was now on the floor. I didn't even see it, but you better believe I started laughing.

"Nice Stilinski, have good fall?"

"You're so hilarious I forgot to laugh-," He was cut off by Mr. Harris. He seemed to be getting cut off more and more, me like! "Ms. McCall, Mr. Stilinski, please save the relationship problems outside the classroom." WHAT?

"We're not together!" Stiles and I shouted simultaneously. Everyone has to stop this!

Mr. Harris looked up from his desk and gave us a bored look. "Sure. Now for the last time, open your book , Ms. McCall, or I'll give you another reason to come after school."

"Threats, Adrian?" I said holding my hand over my heart. "We're back to threats? Oh, you're so kind. My mom would kill me if I got another detention." I continued babbling until the class was trying to keep their laughs in and he had enough.

"Ms. McCall, get to work now!"

"Whatever you say, teacher dearest."

-X-

I was skipping again when my arm was pulled into the boys' bathroom. I was full on ready to scream until a hand quickly covered my mouth. Dang, I know I'm Emily and all, but I didn't want it to be this way! Unless it was Derek.

"I'm going to move my hand," A sexy voice came from behind me. "Don't scream, alright?" DEREK!

I nodded really fast that I could have resembled a bobble head.

Derek removed his hand and I turned around. He was in his all-sexy glory that I couldn't control myself. "Derek!" As soon as the shout was released, he closed his eyes and groaned. I better study this face 'cause it's the one he'll be making with me. Yay, yay!

"I tell you one thing and you do the opposite." Derek said while rubbing a hand down his face.

"It's a talent," I grinned. "So what are you doing here?" Come to kidnap me, so I can show you that kiss properly. Skin on skin, my peeps!

"You heard what happened last night right?"

"Yeah…" I said slowly before perking up. "How did you know?" Was he now stalking me? Oh em gee, what a dream come true! I knew that kiss was going to drive him into my arms. "Did you stalk me?"

He rolled his beautiful green eyes and I felt faint. "No, I was there last night-,"

Le gasp. "Did you do it?"

"Shut up." So commanding.

"Shutting." Only man that could make me do that. Any freakin' way!

"I was saying," He glared at me. He's so dreamy. "That I heard Stiles call you." Oh no, will he think the same as every-freakin'-body else? I shan't let you, love!

"Oh yeah," I nodded. "Stiles, who is just my friend and nothing more."

He raised an eyebrow, but said nothing of it. "Look, I came here to tell you to talk to your friend."

He's gon' have to be specific 'cause everybody loves me. Too many friends to keep track of, broski!

"Lydia," He cleared. "Find out if she saw anything." A mission for Sexy, yay!

I saluted him to which he rolled his eyes. I went to ask him something yes dirty when the door opened. I guess Derek forgot to lock it when I screamed after he told me not to. Evil giggle inserted. Inserted, ha-ha, such a nasty, sick word. I love it.

We both turned and saw Mark, my old Chemistry partner. Oh wait, that's not his name. Wasn't it Jeff or something? Eh.

I grinned at him. "Mark, sup!"

He looked at me before turning to look at Sexy. He looked so little compared to my Derek. Said sexy man was currently glaring at poor Mark as if to telling him to hit the road.

"Uh, it's Zack," He mumbled. No, I'm pretty sure it was either Mark or Jeff. He's lying.

I shook my head. "Oh you! D'you miss sitting next to me? I know I would." I know this because all those times I'm away from Derek.

I went to keep talking, but Derek covered my mouth with his sexy, huge hand. Legit, it covered from one ear to another and even went past my chin. I love a guy with big hands! You know what they say- Big hands, longer fingers. GET IT IN.

"Leave," Derek demanded. When Mark hesitated, he said louder, "Now."

Mark quickly turned around and began to leave when I spoke. Somehow, I managed to escape from Sexy's long, rough fingers. "Oh Marky Mark, could you let The Funky Bunch know that you saw me in here with this guy! Thanks boo-boo!"

I had to let people know that I wasn't with Stiles since everyone thought we were a couple. Shoot, Stiles couldn't even handle me. Now Derek… Yes Derek can handle me any way and anywhere.

Once he left, Derek hissed, "What was that for?" I opened my mouth, but he stopped me. "Never mind, I'll probably regret asking." I grinned at him; He knows me so well. "I have to go. Find out about your friend. Let me know what happens," He suddenly looked pained. "Here's," He let out a breath. "Here's my number."

I waved him off. "Oh that, I already have it." I had that once I met him. How? Never telling. I'm that good.

For once I saw pure shock come on his face, but as quickly as it appeared, it was gone. "What?"

I just started chuckling slowly as he glared at me. "Are you the one who keeps calling and hanging up?"

"Wha? No?" First of all, I whispered inappropriate things then hung up. Get it right, babe.

"Well, I better get going." He kept glaring. "Gotta catch a ride from Stiles since twin's MIA." Glaring. "I'll let you know! Bye Smexy!" I ran out of the restroom and went in search of Stiles, but I couldn't stop the smile appearing on my face.

I called him Smexy to his face; boo-yah!

A/N: So what chu think - 15 reviews. IMPORTANT! I was wondering if anybody would like to create banners for this story. It would be fun to have some, so PM or something. Thanks dawgs.

Author out - Holler.

xInsanelySarcastic