"What is addiction, really? It is a sign, a signal, a symptom of distress. It is a language that tells us about a plight that must be understood."
―Alice Miller,Breaking Down the Wall of Silence: The Liberating Experience of Facing Painful Truth
"Lacey, where are the Blue Ranch chi….ips?" Phoebe stood with her mouth gaped open gawking into Danny's room. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. Was she going to be privy to another Danny and Lacey sexy moment? Only this time it was in person and not on a video.
Lacey grabbed her dress and pulled it up over her partially exposed body. She darted from Danny. She never stopped until she reached Phoebe. She only briefly stopped then to grab Phoebe's hand and run.
SLAM! The bedroom ,where she was staying , door shut with a thud. Danny chuckled then shut his own door. A smile crept across his face. Lacey jumped into the middle of her bed. Her feet went under her. Her hands went to her face as shame hit her.
"What in the world was going on?" Phoebe sat down next to Lacey. She started to rub up and down Lacey's back trying to be a comforting friend.
"I don't know. Something isn't right." Lacey looked up with tears threatening her dark brown eyes. "He unzipped my dress."
"Obviously." Phoebe rolled her eyes as sarcasm poured from her mouth.
"No…" Lacey inhaled. "I saw him in the towel. I…"
"Calm down, Lacey. It would be hard not to look. He is fine. A killer but fine." Phoebe smiled sideways. "I'm sorry that sounded like Sarita. Danny is good looking. There is no denying that. Not to mention you two have a history."
"He caught me looking so I said I needed him to help me with my zipper. I said only an inch or two…" Lacey composed herself trying to make an excuse for her earlier actions. She had an onslaught of guilt hit her. Therefore, she felt compelled to tell Phoebe her excuses. Although at the moment, she wished it was Miriam she was talking to. Miriam might understand Lacey's guilt more. "Danny just smirked and unzipped it all the way. Then he took it off to my waist."
"You didn't stop him?" Phoebe grinned teasingly. "Seriously, Lacey. You know you still have feelings for him."
"It's not that. He'd dating Jo now. I have no right and he doesn't either." Lacey squared back her shoulders. "Danny can't try to seduce me and think I'll fall for it."
"This is Danny. He'd never hurt you." Phoebe assured her. "Everyone is confused with him and Jo dating considering how the boy still stares at you."
"Danny is using me." Lacey felt herself getting angry. "I guess Jo won't be intimate with him so he is trying to use me as a back up for sex."
"Danny? No way." Phoebe shook her head. "My opinion is that he was very embarrassed by what Whitney pulled. Danny probably thought you were in on it because...well..you were the one to jump up. He saw you were checking him out and the boy has some major bravery and played you back. Danny is charming when he wants to be. You're the only person who causes Danny a little doubt in that charm. Besides, Jo isn't so innocent. For your information, she slept with Tyler right after the video of you and Danny was sent all over school."
"What?" Lacey shook her head. That was definitely news to her. It made Jo seem like a complete hypocrite over her reaction to Danny and her keeping their sexual relationship from Jo. "Well, if Danny and she are having sex now. I'll never forgive them. I admit resenting them now but I'm trying to be their friend." Lacey began to chuckle."I sound like I still am dating him. Sorry. Anyway. I guess you're right about Danny paying us back. I'm sure he wouldn't cheat on Jo with me. He had his chance with me and chose her." She laughed at herself. "The chips are in the upper cabinet. I'm going to take a quick shower."
"I'll see you later." Phoebe stood up to walk away. "By the way, I'm glad we're still friends. I'm sorry for ignoring you lately. I didn't know where we stood as friends after all that happened. You'll always be my friend, Lacey. Oh. Lock the door. Although I'm not sure who is more likely to make sexual advances, you or Danny."
"Leave me alone." Lacey threw a pillow towards the door as Phoebe walked out. She then stood up and locked it.
Lacey sighed because she knew that she was frightened of herself as much as Danny. Her caring for him almost had her begging him to continue. If Phoebe hadn't arrived, would she have stopped him?
Lacey made her way back down stairs after showering and pulling on some comfortable clothes. She noticed all the girls gathering their things to head to Whitney's room. They were all laughing. A knock on the door startled the girls out of their giggling mode. Lacey went to answer the door.
"Hi. Is Danny home?" Jo Masterson stood with her hand on her hip.
"Yes. He is upstairs." Lacey smiled trying to befriend an old friend despite the betrayal she felt when she thought of Danny and Jo as a couple.
Jo followed Lacey to the living room. She rolled her eyes at seeing Carman and Patricia, who both were on the cheerleading squad. "A meeting of the pom pom brigade. Is the debate still going on how to spell fight? For the record it is spelled with an I.G.H.T. and not I.T.E."
Patricia gave Jo a dirty look. Lacey decided to get Jo out of there before her eyes were clawed out. They all had new nails to do it too.
"Danny." Lacey pecked on his door. "Danny."
"Coming back for more?" Danny opened the door with a mischievous grin. At least this time, he had sleep pants on .
"What's that supposed to mean?" Jo frowned as she angrily glanced between Lacey and Danny.
"Nothing. Lacey was just mad at me earlier. I figured she was here to tell me to turn down my music or something." Danny winked at Lacey behind Jo's back.
"I wanted to tell you that that Tyler wants his money." Jo sat down.
"Shut up, Jo." Danny warned her about speaking in front of Lacey.
"Ms. Holier Than Thou doesn't know what we're talking about." Jo looked towards Lacey. Lacey's eye twitched angrily at Jo's insult.
Lacey turned to leave. "I don't have to deal with you two. You both can have each other."
Danny grabbed Lacey's shoulder. "Don't call her that, Jo." He then looked at Lacey. "Sorry."
Lacey glanced at Danny. "About everything?"
"Yeah. I was…Just sorry." Danny smiled sideways. He sighed. The drug hadn't really had much affect on him. However, it was all he had at the time. "I guess we're already messing up more and more of the friendship."
"Friends don't act like that, Danny." Lacey turned from Danny again.
"I know. I really am…"
"Sorry. She gets it. Now lets get down to business. Bye, Lacey." Jo flopped on the bed as she kicked off her shoes.
Lacey walked out briskly. Danny turned to Jo angrily. If looks could kill, Jo would be gasping for air about that moment.
"What?" Jo laughed. "Did you see how disgusted she was?"
"Yeah. I did. She thinks we're having …doing things." Danny sat on the edge of the bed.
"I thought you were going to take a little happy pill. It always puts you in a better mood." Jo shrugged nonchalantly. "Besides, aren't we supposed to be a couple. Why does it matter what Lacey thinks? You're my boyfriend now."
"We're not having sex, Jo. Stop pushing for that. I'm being your d#*n boyfriend in name only. You know I don't want you that way." Danny raked his hand through his hair anxiously. "Did you bring what I asked for?"
"Come on, Danny. If you would just give us a chance." She noticed Danny's agitated face. "Did I bring the pills? Got it. Of course I did." Jo sat up and tossed the bottle of pills to Danny "I don't get it. Lacey thinks she's better than you. I'll take you as is."
"I don't want to talk about it. I took a pill or two and it's not enough." Danny crushed the pills on his dresser right in front of Jo. He threw a rolled up bunch of money to Jo before rolling one of the larger bills into a straw form.
Jo stuck the money in her pocket. She bit her lip. "Are you really going to do that in front of me?"
"Just get me the drugs. I need them." Danny ran his hand over his face. "I don't like Tyler selling drugs to kids at school. He could get put away for that."
"Well, you could spend time in juvenile or prison for buying them or using them. So whatever." Jo quipped.
Danny rolled his eyes as he readied to snort the crushed pills. He glanced up. "If you don't like seeing this, leave or look away."
Jo watched feeling uncomfortable as Danny sniffed up the crushed powder. She blinked back tears as she stared at him. She fidgeted with her buttons on her blouse.
"Thanks. Sh#*, I needed that." Danny stated again before falling back into his computer chair.
"I understand, 've said it a half dozen times. YOU NEED THE DRUGS. Danny?"
"Yeah."
"I'd let you. You know." Jo looked over her shoulder at him.
"I know. But I don't want that kind of relationship with you. You better stick to keeping Tyler's sheets warm." Danny half smiled excited about the drug numbing his senses.
Across the hall, the girls were all chatting about gossip around the school. Lacey sat over in bean bag chair listening to the girls scorn other girls. Why weren't the boys held accountable for cheating?
"So what is Blonde Brainiac doing and superstud killer boy?" Carman handed Lacey a can of soda.
"Probably what we all suspect." Sarita sat down in the floor. "Psycho sex."
Across the hall a sudden knocking made the girls look up. Jo screamed. "Oh Danny…Harder!"
Lacey looked down in her drink. It didn't only embarrass her. It hurt her. She wasn't sure why she cared. Neither of them cared about her anymore. But it did hurt and she still cared.
"Stop it, Jo. That isn't funny." Danny glanced up from his desk as the drug started to work in his system.
"I bet they are dying over there." Jo rolled around on the bed laughing. She kicked the wall again. "OH Baby! Make me scream!"
"I said stop." Danny warned angrily. "I mean it, Jo. NOW!"
"I don't care what they think." Jo felt a sudden eery feeling come over her. Danny's eyes were hazed over and he looked at her maliciously.
Danny stood up and walked to the bed. He grabbed Jo forcefully by the arm pulling her up. "I care what Lacey thinks." He pushed Jo against the wall. He pinned her there with his body. "Do you want me, Jo?"
Jo swallowed as she whispered. "Yes."
Danny leaned close to her ear. He jutted out his tongue licking Jo's earlobe. Jo started breathing rapidly with a lustful excitement. Then Danny whispered. "Well, I don't want you."
Danny laughed as he stepped away from Jo. Jo's lip quivered as she stared at the boy she barely recognized. "You're cruel, Danny."
"You're a b#^ch, Jo. Now get the H#** out of my room and my house." Danny grabbed Jo by the neck and pushed her to the door.
"You're hurting me." Jo's heart pounded with fear this time. She never saw Danny like this before.
He pressed Jo against the door and breathed out vehemently. "IF YOU EVER let Lacey know about the drugs or make her think I'm having sex with you, you'll know what real hurt is. Tara's lifeless body won't be the only body found dead in this house."
Then Danny pushed Jo's body out his door. She heard the clicking of Danny's door locking behind her.