"It's probably weird to think about an addiction like it's a sentient being, but that's how it feels. Like it's something living inside you. Something you can't get rid of because killing it means killing you."

―Ellen Hopkins,Identical

Lacey was eager to let Danny become part of her new circle of friends. She happily pulled him along to lunch to sit at a table with Matthew, Isaac, Miriam, and Adam. She smiled sweetly as Danny glanced at them all. He lifted his hand to wave slightly when she reintroduced him to her friends.

"I'm going to get you something from the snack machine." Lacey gingerly stated as she and Miriam got ready to walk away. Danny didn't bother to stop her as Lacey seemed determined to make him gain some weight. She had no idea that Danny didn't have much of an appetite. However, he'd try for her. Lacey added with a huge smile. "You boys can get to know each other better."

She leaned and gave Danny a quick peck on his lips. He smiled broadly feeling overwhelmed at Lacey's display of affection.

However, Danny's joy was short lived. Adam noticed Danny's leg bouncing up and down nervously. He hoped it was Lacey pushing Danny into making them his new friends. But for some reason, this made Adam study Danny more. Adam felt his heart drop when he noticed early symptoms of narcotic withdrawal. Was Lacey's new boyfriend hooked on drugs? He didn't seem the type. However, Adam new full well that there was never really a type when it came to doing drugs.

Adam peeked over his shoulder at Danny again. He estimated that he had to run out of the pills no less than a day ago. Danny's hands shaking made Adam want to question Danny.

"How long have you been hooked?" Adam asked out of the blue. Isaac's and Matthew's eyes widened at Adam's question. It was usually Matthew who asked or stated inappropriate things.

"Dude." Isaac knocked his brother's shoulder. "That is inappropriate and not our business."

Adam nodded to Danny as he kept his eyes staring at the boy. "It isn't like I'm not going to fill you and Matthew in of my thoughts on Danny. So I'm just asking the boy point blank. How long?"

Danny stared strangely at the boys, who seemed to be waiting on his answer. "Seriously, I don't know you enough to start this bro type conversations." He glared at Isaac before stating. "Dude."

"My biological mother was a druggie, Danny. She overdosed." Adam continued talking.

Matthew and Isaac began to get up knowing that Adam was going to share his testimony right then and there. Adam wasn't playing games with this Danny kid.

"We're going to convince the girls that you and Danny are bonding or something." Isaac said as he picked up his tray. "Listen to him, Danny."

Danny wanted to bolt from these weird people who were butting into something not their business. That was until Isaac added before Matthew and he left. "For Lacey. Listen to my brother."

"The craving is probably hitting you. I can tell Lacey knows and she thinks she can save you from yourself. But this isn't going to be an easy thing. Trust me. I watched my real mother try again and again for me. She loved me even if others doubted that love." Adam glanced up gaging Danny's reaction.

"Why are you telling me this, Adam?" Danny raked his hands through his hair nervously. Adam was right about Danny craving the drugs.

"Because I want to tell my story to you so you see that doing drugs isn't only about you. Even though you think you're only hurting yourself or most cases helping yourself, you are hurting those you love." Adam leaned up on his elbows. "So let me tell you how bad this habit of yours can get."

Danny rubbed the back of his neck. "For Lacey, I'll listen."

"Fine." Adam knew he'd not be preaching as he did at youth camp. But it was the same story only not as fiery due to the surroundings. "When I was eight years old, my mom took into a little too much of what she called her recreational fun. I found her with a needle in her arm and her eyes staring in eerie emptiness."

Danny knew that stare well. He saw it with Tara the day he put the rope around her throat and pulled.

"Mom had this number from a rehab place. She had done really good not shooting up for a while but she fell back. The place was called Hope's Blessings. Any way, I called the number because as an eight year old, I thought they could bring my mommy back." Adam flicked his fingers on the table fighting his emotions. "Blake Simms was a counselor there. He came and took me away from that life. I was an angry little boy. They had me placed in a home until a foster family accepted me. All I wanted was my mom back. Anna Perry volunteered as a cook there. That woman thought I was a tyrant. I guess I was. But she didn't see the little boy I was. All she saw was this angry kid that spit her food on her when she tried to get me to eat. One day, Blake made me help in the kitchen." Adam chuckled. "You talk about oil and water that was Anna and I. I hated her because she was opposite of everything my real mom was. I hated how she loved her children. I hated how she happily sang about Jesus when she cooked. I hated that she looked clean and smelled pretty. I hated her." Adam shook his head. "So when everyone cleared the kitchen but Anna and me, I wanted to show her how much I hated her being this perfect mom to her kids when my mom couldn't quit being high long enough to bath herself no less take care of me. I cussed Anna calling her every word that I knew as bad then I literally threw food at her. Do you know what she did?"

"What?" Danny raised his eyebrows figuring Anna hugged him and prayed the demon out of Adam.

"She threw food back at me." That caused both Danny and Adam to laugh. "We literally got into a food fight. Mom, well Anna then, screamed what I brat I was. She had no idea what anger I had in me for her. She didn't know of my real mom because Blake promised me he'd keep my secret when I asked him to from the staff there. She only knew that the more people helped me, the more I did something to make them hate me. I felt unworthy of the kindness. Then suddenly as we looked at each other, we stopped throwing food. Anna stood there with flour and spaghetti dripping from her hair. That was major to my mom. She hates anything happening to hair. I stood there with my arms crossed with spaghetti sauce staining my shirt and face. Then we both started laughing hysterically." Adam blinked as a tear choked him. "I don't know why or how it happened. I still can't remember who did what. But a dam broke that day. A dam of emotional anger and hurt. Somehow I was in Anna's arms in a tight hug. We both were sobbing as I let go of that anger. Mom always said she was crying because she felt right then and there that she found her first born child. She fell so deeply in love with me at that very moment that no mother's love could touch it any better. I think I felt for the first time that I was being held by a mom too. God brought me out of that life even if I was only eight. Mom said he brought her a new understanding of what it meant to be a mother too. She loved Isaac, Miriam, and Matthew as her own. She said she can't explain though the overwhelming feeling she had when she held me and we cried together. We both grieved for the woman I lost that was my real mother but rejoiced for the new bond we felt for each other. God gave us that."

Adam pulled up the sleeve to his shirt. "I got these tattoos due to covering up scars from cutting. I also had a few burn marks from having cigarettes put out on me by my mother's customers." Adam chuckled as he pointed to one tattoo. "I got this one first. It is my favorite cartoon character. Scooby Doo. Any way, I wanted to hide the pain. I was thirteen when I got most these. I thought Dad would beat the heck out of me and mom would have a coronary. That is mom and dad now not the biological ones. I never knew my dad. As you guessed it from saying costumer, my mom was a prostitute." Adam blinked again trying not to get emotional because Danny didn't need that. "No matter how hard I tried with my real mom, I couldn't save her. She could only save herself. You may think you can clean up yourself for Lacey, Danny. But you need to want to clean up for yourself." He took Danny's hand and placed it on his arm. "Feel."

Danny thought the boy was really losing it but he felt bumps and scars hidden by the tattoos. "You really have a lot of hidden scars."

"Yeah. But they're only hidden to the world." Adam released Danny's hand. "I can still feel those scars deep in myself. Every scar was pain I caused myself at ages four to eight when I saw my mom high on something. I wanted control when life was out of control. I thought cutting brought me that. If you think you are only hurting yourself, like I said, you're wrong. Lacey will hurt every time she sees you fail. She will cry and blame herself for not being good enough or loved enough to stop you. Even if you push Lacey away, she's too in love with you not to worry and care. She may move on through God's help but you will still cause her scars in her heart due to that love she has for you. No matter how much mom was out of my life, I still hurt and became bitter. Only God brought me from that. He can Lacey too but why would you want to chance scarring her so severely that it lasts her lifetime? Each scar I hid by some good memory with a tattoo. That is why my arm is so jumbled up with no theme to others but means so much to me. I wanted to hide the scars because I was tired of staring down at what I did to myself and what drugs had caused my biological mother to allow me to do to myself." Adam drew in a deep breath. "Do this for you too, Danny. Because Lacey doesn't need to have scars even hidden ones if you suddenly ,intentionally or not ,die doing these drugs."

Note: Adam's testimony was saved for a reason. Of course, he preached at the camp but Danny needed it to understand that this was hurting others and not just himself. Adam needed to tell Danny that pushing her away wouldn't work. Lacey was too invested in Danny emotionally now.