PREVIOUSLY on "I, For One, Welcome Our Supreme Meme Overlord!"

"You called?"

"A... A dark guardian angel! Thank you, Maria!"

"Great. It's Emo McEdgelord."

Dark Pit took his laurel off like it was a top hat and did a little bow. "Thank you for calling me by my proper name. Now let's fight already!"

Captain Falcon lay on his side, draping his arm over the side of the couch. "Hey, Ness. You seen Shulk around today?"

"Nope, he's gone," Ness replied. "I hope he's not mad at us."

"Yeah."

There were a few moments of silence while Ness scribbled away in his sketchbook. Suddenly, he stood up.

"Done," he said, flipping the book so that Falcon could see the drawing.

It was a crayon sketch of stick figure Falcon laying on his side, shirtless in order to show off his thirteen-pack, his head sensually propped up by his disturbingly-toned arm. The caption underneath said, "draw me liek one of ur frence grills"

"Whoa, you're getting better!" Captain Falcon said encouragingly. "Can I try?"

"Okay."

Ness and Falcon then swapped places, with Falcon drawing and Ness posing. Falcon took one long, focused look at his subject, then furiously scribbled into the sketchbook so hard he scratched a hole into the paper.

"Done!" He showed Ness his drawing. Whatever it was, it looked more like a mess of scribbles than anything resembling a human being.

"Um… To be honest, I have no idea what the heck that's supposed to be," Ness said honestly.

Now that Shadow had gotten his strength back and summoned an ally that could actually fight, Shulk was getting his butt kicked, both figuratively and literally. Dark Pit really seemed to like kicking Shulk in the butt.

Shulk's butt was in major pain, and he didn't know if he could take much more. He knew what he had to do.

"Time to tip the scales!" Shulk shouted. But for some reason, he didn't feel any new plot-convenient strength surging through him.

"Wha- aaAAGH!"

Dark Pit cut him off with an Electroshock Arm to the side, launching Shulk off stage. He activated his Jump Art and used it to Air Slash back to the ledge.

"What happened?" Shulk frantically asked the voice in his head.

That meme only works once per battle! Otherwise it would be too over-powered.

"How come you didn't tell me about this before?!"

I didn't think you would try to use it this much!

"Who the heck are you talking to?" Dark Pit asked, wondering if he was talking to a goddess like how he and Pit could talk to Palutena.

"None of your business!" Shulk replied.

Dark Pit aimed another kick at Shulk's pretty boy booty, but Shulk managed to dodge this time. He was racking up quite a bit of damage, so he activated his Shield Art.

"Give it up already!" Shadow cut in (haha get it? Because edge?), re-summoning his Sword of Ow Edge. "You're outnumbered, two to one!"

"I've fought two to one before and won! Don't underestimate me!" Shulk said back. Suddenly, he came to a realization and jumped away from Shadow and Dark Pit.

"What, are you going to pull another trick out of your ass?" Shadow sneered. "I'd like to see that."

"Oh, it's not coming from my ass," Shulk said with a mischevious grin on his face. He got into a crouching stance like he was going Super Saiyan and then strained like he was constipated. His crotch area began to shine with white light. Dark Pit realized what was going to happen and jumped up as high as he could.

"EXPAAAAND… DOOONG!" Shulk shouted, firing a white laser from his area down south. Shadow was caught in the blast and sent flying offscreen.

"Damn! How could this happen?!" he screamed as he went blasting off again. He disappeared as a twinkle in the sky, joining his rival-and-maybe-but-he-would-never-admit-it-friend, Sonic.

An orb of strange black light floated down into Shulk's hands.

You got Shadow's meme! said the voice in Shulk's head. Now you, too, can be so angsty and edgy it physically hurts! But that might just be from the cringe…

"Okay, so what?"

Well, you can also summon a cool black sword made of concentrated edge. In fact, it may be so sharp it can cut anything! Even a god, if you met one!

"That sounds much better," Shulk said, satisfied.

"Seriously, who are you talking to," Dark Pit asked again, floating back down to the ground.

"Well, if I told you, you'd probably think I was crazy."

"You're already insane. I still remember that thing you did in the cafeteria."

"...Well, there's this voice in my head, I'm not exactly sure who it is. But they seem to know a lot about memes."

Dark Pit raised his eyebrows.

...Oh wait, you're an edgelord, not a memelord. My mistake! Just put the meme down and pretend you didn't hear voices in your head.

"You really are insane," he scoffed, turning away.

Shulk sighed. "I knew you would think I was crazy."

There were a few moments of silence, made extra awkward by the fact that they were standing in a void.

Dark Pit sat down and sighed.

"Something wrong?" Shulk said.

"Now that Shadow's gone… I don't have anything to do anymore. I don't have a purpose anymore," he said, being all angsty. He crossed his arms out and looked edgily out into the void, almost as if he wanted to disappear into it.

"…Why don't you join me, then?"

Dark Pit looked at the Monado boy in surprise.

"The more the merrier. Plus my goal is to have at least five people in the squad."

"…Your skills are pretty good, for a human. Fine, I'll join you."

"Well, that settles it! Now we're friends."

Dark Pit's eyes went wide.

"Wait. F-friends?!" he stuttered.

"Yeah!" Shulk said cheerily.

"I thought you meant I would be, like, your combat servant!"

"Yeah, that. But we can be friends, too!"

"We're not f-f-friends! It's not like I l-like you that much or anything!" he insisted. He took out his Silver Bow and began to fiddle with it, grumbling something about friendship being sappy and he didn't need it.

Shulk smiled. He might be an Emo McEdgelord on the outside, but on the inside he really just wanted a friend to share with. What a softie!

"…Now how do we get out of here?" he asked.

"…Crap. Shadow was supposed to teleport us out."

The next day, Sonic, Peach, and Mr. Game & Watch all inexplicably returned to the mansion. So did Shulk, Dark Pit, and Shadow. (Master Hand, tired of the fan complaints and threats of losing money, had sought them all out and brought them back to the mansion in the spirit of capitalism. It wasn't that hard, considering he had the amazing power of dimension warping.)

Zelda was happy to see Peach and Mr. Game & Watch again, and Samus was also happy that her friend wasn't excessively sighing anymore. They, along with Sheik, all went back to having their usual tea parties as always. Peach and Mr. Game and Watch had some very interesting stories to share about the red planet and its green dancing inhabitants.

Later that day, Shadow and Sonic were also brought back together in a surprisingly dramatic reunion at twilight.

"What the hell were you thinking, faker!" Shadow burst out upon seeing Sonic's silhouette on the horizon. He started sprinting toward where Sonic was, his arms extended outward.

Sonic turned around, surprised at hearing the voice.

"Shad-"

He was quickly cut off by a Chaos Spear to the face.

"Hey! What was that for?" he whined.

"Don't ever make me worry like that again!"

"…Huh, what?"

Shadow tackled the other hedgehog to the ground in a rage.

"I worked my damn ass off trying to avenge you, and you just show up one day like 'huh, what?'" Shadow punched Sonic in the face. "You're supposed to say something like 'Missed me?' like we're in a generic romance movie!" He punched him again. "And then we hug and start crying!" Another punch.

"Ow! I'm glad you care and all, but can you please stop hitting me?"

"I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU, FAKER!" Shadow shouted, punching Sonic again for good measure.

"Yeah, yeah, I missed you too," Sonic said frantically, in the hopes that it would make Shadow stop abusing him.

It did. Shadow, satisfied by his response, brought Sonic into a hug (read: strangle hold) and started crying. Sonic just

Shulk brought Dark Pit to his friends in the lounge, eager to introduce another member to the squad.

"This is Dark Pit," he said. Dark Pit held his hand up in halfhearted greeting.

"We know that, you dingus," Ness snarked.

"Mind if he joins us? He doesn't have any friends."

"Don't you have Pit?" asked Captain Falcon.

"That fake? He's annoying."

"How edgy," Ness said. "Is he even a memelord?"

"I don't think so," Shulk said. "But… he doesn't have any friends."

"Well, if you put it like that… I guess you can hang with us then," said Falcon.

"Yeah, okay," said Ness.

Dark Pit smiled ever so slightly, then corrected himself. Why was he happy to make friends with these guys? It couldn't be that he was losing his edge, was he?

"Woo!" Shulk cheered. "We can all go out for milkshakes tomorrow! I'm so pumped!" He had a grin on his face that spread from ear to ear. Captain Falcon and Ness were relieved to know that he wasn't mad at them for suddenly ditching him.

However, in a brief moment when they looked away, Shulk's eyes flashed red.

The plot thickens... I've got the basic plot for the remaining four chapters written out. However, I may have to end up splitting them into two or three parts (like I usually do).

Also, classes start tomorrow, so no updates for a while probably.