© Ellie Goodson 2016

Chapter Fifteen-Hot like wildfire

~Arabella Jones~

Fire. It was all I felt as I tossed and turned in the Joker's bed. The purple sheets were tangled between my legs as I panted and blew sweaty hair from my forehead, God I was so hot. Both of the pillows had been launched across the room in a fit of frustration, and I would've opened the window but a shiny new lock had been placed on it to stop me from escaping again. I didn't even leave through the window; I had actually calmly walked out of the door.

Groaning out loud, I pushed myself up from the laid down position and swung my legs off the bed. I was in the shortest shorts I had, and wore the thinnest tank top that I owned, but I couldn't cool myself down no matter what I did. My leg killed whenever I tried to walk, but I needed to move around and get something cold inside of my system. So I limped over to the door, before throwing it open and being wrapped in slightly cooler air.

I pulled my hair into a high ponytail while limping down the hall, trying my best to find my way to the kitchen. There had to be some form of food place, the Joker needed food and water to live, he was only human. My feet trailed blissfully over the cold, hard ground. I could almost see steam floating off of my body. I wasn't cool enough yet, I needed to have a drink and get into a cooler room.

Sneaking through the hallways, careful not to disturb anyone as it was two in the morning, I padded along the cold floor until eventually approaching a room that shone a bright light and contained everything a kitchen should. I carefully stepped through the open door, feeling a little safer as it was the most normal room that I had come across at my time in the warehouse. If anyone was to randomly arrive in this room, they wouldn't think it was in the Joker's warehouse. It was an intoxicating feeling, to feel as safe as I did right there and then.

I opened several cupboards before opening one that contained glasses. I rinsed out the cup-just in case, I couldn't exactly fully trust the man yet-before filling it with cool water. The glass was empty within seconds as, once I started drinking the blissful water, I couldn't stop while it dripped down my throat heavenly. I wiped over my mouth with the back of my hand, carefully placing the cup in the sink.

I was still wide awake and burning hot, and I was beginning to think that I was coming down with an illness. I pressed my wrist to my head, taking a deep breath and sighing heavily. I hadn't slept all night, and my leg was beginning to cause me agony. I limped over to the table that rested in the middle of the bright kitchen. I found myself out of breath and struggling not to cry by the time I got to the large oak table, and had to rest my hands on it to take the pressure off of my leg.

God I was in agony, I needed some form of pain killers for my swollen and irritated muscles. "You're in pain." A voice that was highly familiar, a voice that sent my heart into overdrive and yet oddly made me feel calm, spoke suddenly. I jumped a little, having not heard anyone approach. Turning my head to watch at the clown came closer to me, my heart sped up and stomach dropped.

"No shit." The words came out weak, and sounded more pained than I had planned. I hated admitting to being in pain, suffering in front of other people. It was humiliating, to be so weak and helpless.

The clown was right next to me now, and I could feel the heat radiate off of his skin. "You're hot."

"Excuse me?" I felt proud to hear genuine shock in the Joker's voice, but that wasn't what I had meant.

"Your skin, it's burning hot. I'm already boiling; feel like a real life radiator right now."

"You're not making any sense. You're actually freezing cold; you need to go back to bed." I tightened my fists, letting my head fall down so that my chin touched my chest as I bent over, feeling pain surge through me.

"I am not cold, I am burning. I am in agony, and I swear to god if you don't get me some pain killers I am about to stab you and take them myself." I spat the words through gritted teeth, no longer wanting but needing some pain relief.

The Joker walked out of my eye sight; all I could hear was shuffling and cupboards opening and closing. "What are you doing up at this time anyway?"

I asked, trying to take my mind off the pain.

"I could ask you the same, doll. I couldn't sleep, never really can these days." A glass was placed in front of me, along with a packet of pain relief. I pressed out two from their capsules, and swallowed them down with the water. I thanked the clown, waiting impatiently for the pain to subside.

I wanted to cry, to burst into a sobbing mess and break down. I wanted to scream and shout, to slam my fists onto the table and break everything in sight. I felt it bubbling up inside me, felt my throat swell and the pressure build in my eyes, this was what always happened before I was about to break. I tried my hardest not to cry, but the tears kept filling my eyes until they spilled over and dripped down my cheeks. A sob escaped my mouth like a choke, and that was when I was left with no control.

I caught out of blurred vision the clown hesitantly making his way closer to me. He seemed curiously sympathetic, like he was sorry for me but he didn't understand why I was crying or what crying was. The tears kept on coming; they wouldn't die away as I felt everything in me break. My heart shattered, my emotional tolerance was blown to smithereens and I fell apart like a broken plate. It got to a point where the clown was by my side once more. He was close enough to touch, but still cautious. As if he didn't want to scare me.

I was so sick of all this cautiousness. The hesitancy, it was driving me insane. I didn't want to be scared of him anymore, and I didn't want him to be scared of me. So while the Joker wasn't paying attention, I smashed myself against him and held on for dear life-sobbing as I did so. To be honest, I was done being alone. I needed someone to hold onto, someone to piece me back together while I fell apart in their arms. I didn't know if the Joker was that for me, but I held on as tight as I could for as long as I could.

And then the most curious, the most shocking and unexpected thing happened. I felt arms wrap back around me, and pull me closer. And like that, the clown himself was holding me, comforting me, calming me. And it was perfect. It was so perfect, it felt so good to be held, to be embraced in calming warmth and just be allowed to cry, to let all of my kept up emotions out and have someone there to just support me, to keep me together.

He held me. He kissed my head and rubbed my back. He comforted me in every way possible, and he didn't walk away. He stayed. I was aware of the fact that I was wearing barely anything, and that I could feel his cool hands on my bare skin. When eventually my tears slowed, and my sobs faded into continuous hiccups, that was when he pulled away. Not to leave, but to calm me into a normal state once more. The Joker looked into my eyes with concerned ones of his own, and there was something in his eyes that I'd never seen before and never thought I'd see. That clown, with his floppy green hair and pure white skin, big black eyes and a wide red smile, he was the most perfect clown I'd ever seen. He cupped my cheek with one of his hands; his touch was gentle and soft.

We stayed there for a little while longer, just watching each other, still touching in some form of way. He held onto my face, while I still held onto him-determined not to let him go. "The best thing I ever did was kidnap you." The Joker told me, laughing lightly at the irony.

"I wasn't lying, the other day. When I told you I had planned on coming back, I really had. But then Ivy came along and saved me from Scarecrow, and was determined on taking me back to the apartment with her. And then you came along. But if I hadn't had a run in with Scarecrow, if I was left to safely stroll the streets, it would've only been an extra five minutes or so before I came back, came home." I closed my eyes, sighing heavily. "I hate being so weak, especially in front of you."

The Joker didn't reply, instead I felt him pull me closer. I didn't think of what was going to happen, and so I stayed calm in his arms, eyes closed, awaiting whatever was about to happen. But then I felt something, something hot and new and amazing. A kiss, on the lips, from the Joker. It took me a couple of seconds of hesitation before pure instincts took over and, once they did, I found myself kissing him back. With pure, hot and white passion. I probably shouldn't have kissed him back, but I did. And it was one of the most memorable things that had ever happened to me, even there, in the moment, the event was repeating itself in my brain. I was kissing the Joker, he was kissing me, and neither of us were stopping.

My whole body was alight with fire. Everything about me, was lit up like a flame, the heat that I was feeling was like nothing like before. Every part of me was switched on, sparked like a firework. As cliché as it seemed, he was the spark that I needed. He made me feel alive, like I wasn't someone trapped inside someone else's plan, stuck in work all their life. I wanted freedom, I wanted exotic and crazy and adventure. I wanted fire, and every burning part of it. And that's what he gave me, that was what he was, he was the fire that melted the ice. I needed my ice melted. His touch, his taste, his smell and just everything about him, it was fire, and it burned, but I didn't care. In fact, I think I loved it.

I needed his kiss, his touch, his words; I needed the Joker that I never saw because he never showed his human side. Not unless he was with me. I needed him, and every crazy part about him. But there was a method to his madness, and maybe there was a method to the madness within me hoping that the kiss didn't end any time soon. Hoping that maybe this went a little further than a onetime thing, just out of pure pity. I wanted real, but did he? He was insane and deadly and someone I should've avoided and I'd fallen hopelessly in love with him and everything about him.