Her eyes shooting open and taking a big gasp of air, Elsa shot up and looked around. Breathing heavily, hastily checking her body and searching around herself, Elsa came to realize where she was. Closing her eyes and running a hand through her hair, she slowed her breathing and leaned back against the car seat. After a few moments she opened her eyes. The car was parked and with a greenhouse in front of her, she recognized the old building. Peering into the shop, she spotted Anna inside looking around. Feeling a bit calmer Elsa took a deep breath and for a few moments, she admissibly smiled, admiring Anna's felicity.
Her sister wasn't that far into the shop and from what Elsa could see, she could tell Anna was smiling, and probably humming or singing to herself. Elsa's smile broadened a bit. Her eyes followed along Anna's every movement. She looked as Anna would pick up flower after flower, sniffing them and smiling before placing them back down or add them to the flowers she had in her arms. Elsa's eyes eventually landed on her sisters smile.
Her smile is just so full of happiness. Even from when we were just kids her smile would make me feel better. Know matter how bad my day had gone, or how much I questioned myself, her smile would make it all go away. At the same time, just her being there for me was enough. Elsa's eyes shifted slightly down and her small smile faltered. It was only another thing I had tried to forget.
Elsa grimaced, rolling her eyes and groaning. "Damn it," she whispered, "stop thinking like that. I'm not that same person anymore."
Again, like a blink of an eye, an imagine flashed before her eyes, but this one was different. Unlike the gruesomeness or panic of death or chaos, this showed a face, a face of a woman. Though the image was quick, it burned it's self into Elsa's thoughts, and consumed her attention. This woman had deep apple red hair, a light splash of freckles that crossed over her nose and laying beneath both her eyes and speckling her oval cheeks. Accompanied with small her nose and shark bite piercings below her thin lips, Elsa tried everything to lose the picture from her mind.
But everything she did made it worse. It was until she said "I wish I never left," That the final feature of the woman beamed into Elsa's thoughts. The feature that scarred Elsa the most, what lay perfectly beneath mysterious thin eyebrows, what made Elsa's heart flutter and shorten her breath. What made her change.
Those almond shaped deep sea blue eyes. Piercing like a snipers bullet. Callous like a clap of thunder during the most violent of storms. Heartless like someone with nothing lose, or gain. But somehow, gentle like an oceans breeze. Loving like a parent's warm hug and finally perception.
Feeling her eyes burn and going numb through out her body, Elsa let out a small yelp and choked back tears. She gritted her teeth and told herself to stop. Don't, please. Not now. Elsa's eyelids twitched and her lips quivered. Gritting her teeth as hard as she could, Elsa tried to hold back the pain. Conceal, hold it in god damn it. But the woman's was more than just imprinted onto her thoughts and memory.
She could her the woman's voice.
Elsa's head fell into her hands and her body fell forward. Though silent, tears dripped through her fingers, landing on her legs. The only sound being muffled breaths. "Coniunctum." The woman's voice echoed with in Elsa. Then a memory slowly played as more tears dripped between Elsa's fingers.
"Video in te, sicut pars vestrum."
"Are these from some scholar or book? I've never heard of any these phrases before" Elsa said as the women walked with her.
"My mother would always tell me them. They were never from anything, she just made them up and never told me what they meant, the bitch. She would always say to feel what meant. I never gave a damn though. It was bullshit to me. So, it only makes sense that I never figured them out." The woman suddenly stopped and sat down next to a parked Humvee. Elsa furrowed a brow, but sat next to the woman. The woman then turned herself and leaned against Elsa. "I didn't figure them out until I was in college, of course it was too late by then, but for all those years my mother told me these things and even after she died and my Dad changed, I still decided to learn what they meant." The woman scoffed and smirked, shaking her head. "I guess I never truly saw them as bullshit after all." She whispered
"Your Dad was-"
"Was nothing more than a hindrance to my life, my mothers death showed me who he really was, and I don't care what you think about him so shut up and listen." Elsa just shrugged and leaned back again the Humvee. "So when I got to college I took the first class that was available. Figured that if I were to lazy to use the internet I could at least force myself to learn the fucking language." The woman paused for a moment. She picked at her nails then through a small rock. "My mother knew she was dying. But before she did, my mother said that my father would show me who I really was."
"How? You and your dad would always argue and he would always threaten you." Elsa said bluntly.
"Yah and he was all bark and no bite. If he ever threatened to hurt me I'd look at him straight in the eyes and taunt him. I knew he couldn't hurt me." The woman laughed. "The only person he could ever hurt was himself."
"I still don't know what to make of you yet."
"Good, maybe we can figure each other out in the future, but for now, I'm gonna keep you guessing at who I am. Like how I'm not gonna tell you what those phrases mean yet. Your not the only one with things they want to keep secret, remember that."
"Then am I gonna work for them, or are you gonna tell me when the time is right, like a cliché." Elsa said sarcastically.
"No, I want you to let go of the one emotion that controls your façade first, then I'll tell you."
Elsa grimaced and her voice became rancorous. "I already told you that I'm going to talk about something you can't help me with. Just let it go already. I'm going on a run." Elsa scowled at the woman before walking.
"You can't force down who you really are." Elsa stopped in her tracks. "The relationship I had with my mother and you with yours is practically the same. But at the same time she couldn't do everything. The reason my mom said that to me was so that I could learn to get past everything on my own, with no one there to help but myself. It sounds harsh but living that kind of life will show you the world for what it really is."
"We may love each other Elsa, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna be nice and soothing to help you with your bullshit, and you know that. So walk away, like you always do. I'm going to help you Elsa, and it won't be pleasant. But believe me, I'll show you what you really are in the end. Have fun with your self-loathing bullshit. We'll talk later, It's not like you can runaway, we're already in hell."
The pain, the intolerable pain that Elsa felt within herself made everything numb. The feeling of having nothing but scars digging into every part of her person. The empty shell she had once filled was back. Everything hurt and it wasn't going to leave.
Elsa took her hands away from her face and looked at them. Still covered by the leather gloves. She ran her finger tips across the palms of her hands. Feeling the velvety, frictionless texture. She looked at the gloves intently, examining them very closely. There was nothing to see in the black hole that covered her hands. But even though the dark void sucked in and hide everything, Elsa could see what lay beneath.
Slamming her fist into the side of passenger door, Elsa reminded herself that everything that she had become, was behind her. I'm where I belong now. Fuck these delusions and memories. "I'm done with it!" Elsa clenched her fists until they started to shake and gritted her teeth. IT'S OVER! Forget it. These memories are nothing. They mean nothing to me. Elsa pressed her eyes closed, but still she could see and remember everything the woman she loved did for her. Elsa brought her legs closer to herself and wrapped her arms around them. I thought I could try and become something I'm not. Turns out I lost everything I didn't know I could lose. "I just want to forget it all, and I'll do whatever it takes to do so." Even if that means I have to leave Anna.
"Don't you dare say that." The man's voice said. "That can mean more than what you think it does now." His tone was condescending and angry. "Your selfishness will hurt your sister more than anything."
"She can never feel what I do." Elsa said back bitterly. "She may be my sister but that doesn't mean she can understand me. She never has."
"Idiot. You never gave her a chance, and you to naïve to realize she already has."
"I'm the idiot. I say it over and over again and it seems no matter what I say, no one will ever understand what I feel." Elsa's started raising her voice louder and louder. Anger and bitterness growing as well.
"Don't do this to her Elsa. Don't leave her alone again. You promised to make up for what you left behind."
Elsa dolefully lowered her anger. "I know, but a promise are like memories, they can easily be forgotten...or replaced."
"Or be cherished."
"Fuck off." Elsa snarled.
"How would Anna react to how you think. Is this who you really are Elsa. I thought Marson brought out who you really are and from what I remember, the Elsa I knew would never hurt the ones she loved."
Once again, Elsa grew angry. "I don't know who you remember, but how could you remember anything? Your just a figment of my imagination."
"Am I." All of a sudden Elsa felt cold, and at that moment she couldn't tell what she was talking to. "Elsa, the more you deny who you are, the more you deny my help, and the more you neglect to realize that there are people out there that care about you and would do anything to help you, the more your just going to be alone and eventually ruin what you have left to live for."
"What ever you are, I'm done listening and I'm going to get over whatever I'm feeling. And I'm going to do it alone. Marson's not here anymore." The air around Elsa turned back to normal and she felt alone again.
But that wasn't before the voice came back to say one last thing. "The next time you here from me, it will be to tell you that there's nothing to fix the mistakes you made. That isn't a threat, nor is it a promise."
"I don't care because I won't be hearing from you ever again. You can't scare me Kristoff."
Elsa ran her left hand through her hand hair and looked down at the floor of the car. Suddenly she wondered if the conversation she just had was real. Could it have been real? Wanting to get out of the car and just want to be with Anna, Elsa hastily unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the car door. She walked toward the entrance of the shop, but stopped and looked back at the car. For a quick second, across the street, she thought she saw a blonde man looking at her with fearful but hurt eyes.
Shaking her head she turned back around and walked towards Anna.
Anna looked up and smiled as Elsa approached her. "Hey sleepy head, how are you feeling?"
"I'm...good, just a bit, uhh, tired, still I guess. I'm just wondering what we're doing here." Elsa feigned a smile.
"Well, we're not in Alexandria as you could probably tell and where also not that far from Mt. Vernon."
"I kinda guessed that already. This is the florist shop Grandma would take us to sometimes." Elsa's feigned smile broadened.
Anna gave a small smile. "Fun times coming here. Hopefully that can continue just a bit more."
Elsa furrowed a brow. "What do you mean?"
"Mount Comfort Cemetery is 10 minutes away."
Elsa's eyes dropped to the floor. "Oh."
"I know and fun time is almost over but, lets look for a few minutes and talk about something funny, okay?"
Elsa smiled. "Okay, well I already see that you have some flowers picked out."
"Just some Purple Iris and Marigolds. Mom's favorite flower was Iris and her favorite color is purple."
"Good thing nature was thinking ahead for us."
"I know right." Anna smiled. "Dad said his colors were always whatever made him look like royalty. He always had a splash of yellow with his clothes but he wore red a lot. Marigolds look better with Purple Iris but these Larkspurs are speaking to me."
"Well those are my favorite flowers so that may be why."
"Really? You look more like a Glory of the Snow person." Elsa playfully rolled her eyes. "What?" Anna said innocently.
"Oh nothing, the flowers you picked are fine. They look beautiful."
"Okay, but we could always add more. I mean we could add some Larkspurs and instead of more Marigolds we get some poppies. Oh! We could even add some roses and something white too. Or, or we have purple, yellow, and white flowers. But with the Larkspurs it would look cooler and with just something white it would great. Hmm, what do think?" Anna looked at Elsa curiously.
"Well after all that, I' still think the flowers you have now are good. Maybe I would say to something brighter to have more flare. It's up to you the though."
"Ugh, but we could add so much more."
"What is this we. It's you. I like what we have now."
Anna pursed her lips and looked between the flowers she had in her arms and every other flower in the shop. "Hmm, well, yah I like these and the first choice is always the best choice." Anna smiled at Elsa.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes one-hundred and ten percent."
"Really?" Elsa said as she smirked.
"Yes, really. Come on lets go."
"Well,"
"Well what?! The fuck is that supposed to mean?"
"Don't curse so loud. I just want to make sure it's what you want."
"Your such a bitch," Anna smiled and lightly pushed Elsa. "Come on lets go. I said I like the ones we have now."
"Only if you want to." Elsa smirked.
"Shut up." Anna laughed.
The car slowed and made a left turn.
"Here we are." Anna said a bit gloomy. "You ready?"
"Yah." Elsa whispered.
Anna slowly drove the car around a few turns until she stopped on a small hill. Both girls out of the car and walked to a pair of marble small benches that stood alone on the top of the hill. Walking in silence the only sounds came from the light wisp of the wind on tree branches. Caressing every leaf on the trees. Birds where singing to each other, the undertone of chirping baby birds would ease through some of the sounds.
"It's very pretty here. A great view of everything." Elsa said as she looked around.
"Yah, it is. They always loved sit at watch the view from our house. This was the closest thing I found that looked like it." The two of them came to the two benches, on the front of each read the names of Elsa and Anna's parents; Agnarr Maurice Blake, and Iduna Pascale Blake. "They would sit there for hours. So instead of headstones I thought it would be nice to get small benches." Anna sat first, on her fathers bench on the right hand side, Elsa on her mothers. In between the two of them was metal vase.
Anna poured water into and set the flowers. The two of them sat down, Elsa their mothers bench and Anna on their fathers.
"I don't know what to say. Only that it's beautiful." Elsa folded her arms across herself.
Anna sighed, "It is and, you don't have to say anything. It's time I told you everything, that's happened." Anna took a deep breath. "The money that Mom and Dad left for us in there will is still there, just not as much as there used to be." Elsa remained silent. "There's only about ten grand in it. The bulk of what used to be there was used to pay off the rest of the house."
"How much was that?" Elsa said.
"About thirty thousand dollars. Then I used nearly ten thousand for the funeral. It blew my mind that it was so expensive." Anna gave an airy laughed and looked at Elsa with an empty smile. "Anyways, after all that there was about twenty-five thousand left and," Anna sighed "and now comes the story." Anna took a deep breath. "You knew that I was dating this boy that Mom and Dad didn't like that much. You remember his name."
"Hans right, Hans Wes or West-something."
"Yah, well he helped me through a lot after mom and dad pasted away. He helped organize the funeral and showed me how to take care of all the money Mom and Dad had left for us. He helped me get through the rest of high school, and apply to college. He made me feel happy. Nothing was going wrong, and from the way he treated me I thought I had really found the one."
Anna sighed. "He showed me how to take care of the money, I already said that but, he was siphoning money for himself little by little. From the very beginning of the when they died he wanted the money. I should've picked up on it but I was just so happy to have somebody that I cared about and cared about me, or so I thought."
Berating herself and feeling that everything was her fault, Elsa suddenly felt Anna's hands on her own. "I know your probably blaming yourself and getting angry at. It shows on your face like a flare. I know you want to kill Hans like I did. But just listen for now. I don't want you to miss something."
Elsa got up and sat next to Anna, holding onto her hand the whole time. "Okay." She said calmly.
Anna smiled. "So, the way I found out was when Oaken told me. You know Uncle Oaky one of mom and dads good friends that's also this big time law person." Elsa nodded her. "Anyways, he was going through some of the bank statements and accounts. He said that for a few months that there were small amounts of withdrawals from the our account into some other account under an unknown name. For a week I asked Hans about it and he said not to worry about. That it wasn't important."
Elsa look as Anna ran her hand through her hair and bit her lip. "Anna what is it?"
"I don't know why he wanted it so much. I was so stupid to just let him do it. I should've known from the very start. But no, I let him get the best of me and play with my emotions." Anna sighed and looked away.
"Where is he now Anna?" Elsa said as anger coated her voice.
"Jail." She said nonchalantly. "Oaken looked into the accounts and saw that Hans' name was somewhere where it shouldn't or some shit. I don't care to remember how he found out, only that he told me what he thought Hans was up to. I immediately went to the police once he told me."
"Wait, if you had feelings, especially strong feelings for him, why did you just report him to the police Anna. That doesn't really make sense to suddenly just turn on him. I know that taking our money is horrific, but why change on a dime." Sitting in silence for a moment Elsa turned and took Anna's chin, turning her head so that she could look into Anna's eyes. "What else did he do to you Anna?"
"It's not what he did to me, it's what I let him do. Just because I'm usually chipper and blissful, it doesn't mean I can't get depression too."
"Anna what did he do to you?" Elsa said sternly.
"I just wanted to feel like I mattered."
"What are you talking about Anna?" Elsa remember that for a short time when Anna was just beginning high school that she had gone through depression for not feeling like she mattered. "Stop dancing around the question Anna, what did he do to you?" Her sister was silent, and the expression of regret and pain made Elsa furious. "Anna!?"
"He was my first Elsa, and over time he took advantage of how vulnerable I was. It got to the point where it made me sick. By the time I found out about the money, he would force himself on me, even if I tried to stop him." Anna sighed.
Elsa briefly looked away from Anna. Besides the last part she said, I know what that feels. Instead of getting angry and telling herself what a terrible sister she was, Elsa sighed and took Anna's hand. "I know what that feels like. The need to feel like your worth something to someone, to feel special, to feel loved. I've been down that road too Anna, I've known what it feels like."
"So your not mad at me, or at yourself?"
"Oh Anna, how could I not be mad at myself and how could I ever be mad at you for something that's not even your fault? I've seen the happiest people in the world fall into depression. I just hate that one of those people had to be you, and I'm sorry that something like this had to happen to you, and I'm sorry that I let this happen to you." Those last words falling out of Elsa's lips accidently.
"You don't have to be sorry Elsa and don't feel sorry for something that's never your fault." This time Elsa stood up. Holding herself and pacing back in forth, she was about raise her voice about being a terrible sister and for leaving Anna and their parents when they needed her. But just as she opened her mouth, Anna calmly stood up. "I'm not telling you this just so you can beat yourself up. I'm telling you this so you know what happened and that it's over and I've moved on." Anna took Elsa by her shoulders and sat her back down. "I've moved on Elsa. Yah I still ponder on what Hans did but it's all in the past and know look at me. I'm in my last year of community college and with the scholarships and with help from financial aid, I can get into a good university for teaching. I'm not the irresponsible, blissful little girl I used to be. I'm woman now and damn fine one."
Elsa took a deep breath and looked back at her sister and smiled. "You're right Anna. But you know me to well to think that I'm not going to hate myself for what happened, but I'm going to do my best to see past that. You are grown up and so am I. You've said it before that I'm past what I used to be," Only, I've become something worse, "So thank you for telling me what happened and, I know Mom and Dad are proud at what you've accomplished I know I am."
Anna brought Elsa in for an hug and squeezed. "Okay, Anna. Bone crushing hugs are still a little girls thing."
"No there not. You're never to old for somethings, like ice cream you want to go get some."
Anna released Elsa, and smiled as she looked into Elsa's eyes. "I'd love to. Just as long as you've told me everything that's important."
"That's it. There are some small things but I'll tell you them in the car. If you want, we could stop by the house, pick up somethings for you."
"Sounds great."
"Then lets go." Anna took Elsa's hand and started to walk away."
"Wait, you can go to the car, I want to say a few things before I go first."
"Okay, take all the time you." Anna smiled and walked back to her car.
As soon as Elsa saw her sister get in the she turned and looked at the benches. "Hi Mom and Dad." Elsa closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I know what you felt when I left and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I couldn't be the daughter you thought and hoped I was. I tried to follow what you had planned for me but we both know I was never going to make it." Elsa paused and folded her arms across her chest. "What I told you about joining the marines and wanting to leave was a lie. I hate why I left and the way I did, why I could never tell you or Anna the real reason. But, now I am. It may be too late to tell you but Anna would say it's never to late. Also I'm going to tell Anna eventually but I'm afraid of what she'll think of me when I do. I can't let her see me for who I am now." Elsa shuffled her feet and looked back at the car. She caught her sisters gaze, Anna smiled and wave and so did Elsa. "Now that I think about it, I don't think I'll ever tell her. But while I have the chance, I'm telling you, so-"
Five years ago
Anna was at her desk, on her laptop. Focused and vigorously typing away at an English paper she had saved till last moment. It was nearly 1 o'clock in the morning on a Monday. The whole house was perfectly quite and with her parents being heavy sleepers, Anna knew she would get this paper done. With Monster energy drinks keeping her alive she was well on her way to being done.
I write my best at last minute anyways. Getting up to look through her backpack she saw she had somehow taken Elsa's instead. "Shit." She whispered. Even though there parents where heavy sleeps, the floor boards squeaked incredibly loud, and with Elsa's room was down stairs Anna knew she was gonna have to be super stealthy to get her backpack, that is if Elsa even had it.
Before taking the agonizing trip to Elsa's room, Anna looked around her own room hoping to find her backpack. If I get down there, not find it, and wake Elsa up I'm gonna pay big time. She hates it when I sneak in her room uninvited. Unable to find her backpack, Anna took Elsa's backpack and started the long trip to her sister's room.
Though the house was quite, every small sound Anna made was like it was amplified through speakers set on eleven. Every creek, sounded like it lasted an eternity and as she approached the door of her parents room the loudest, or at least in Anna's mind, creek in the floor boards echoed through the halls. Stopping her place and not moving a single inch, Anna waited for her parents to open the door and scold her for doing an assignment at last minute. Feeling her heart beat in her throat Anna stood in place for seemed like an eternity. But the door never opened and from there Anna made past her parents room and down the stairs.
Once she went past the family room she was at Elsa's door. Putting her ear to the door, she hoped Elsa wouldn't wake up once she opened the door. Looking at the door knob and took a deep breath and grabbed it.
Opening the door she was surprised to see Elsa still up. There were no lights on in the room but the moonlight that came through Elsa's giant window illuminated the entire room. Sitting on her bed with her arms hugging her legs, Elsa was facing away from Anna. "What do you want?" She mumbled.
"Elsa, I have your backpack and uh, I was wondering if you by chance you had mine." Anna said in a hushed voice
"It's by my desk." Elsa mumbled again.
Anna already knew something was wrong with Elsa and from the dry and low voice she could tell Elsa had been crying. Instead of going to get her backpack she put down Elsa's and crawled on the bed, sitting next to her sister. "Elsa do you wanna talk about something?" Anna said warmingly.
"No, just leave me alone." Elsa turned her back towards Anna and wrapped her arms around her legs tighter.
"Elsa, I'm not just going to leave while your like this."
"I don't care. I want to be alone Anna." Elsa mumbled again.
"But I can help you Elsa. Just give me a chance."
"No, you can't help me Anna, and I don't want you to."
"Whether you want to or not I'm not going to just leave."
"Why can't you understand that you can't help me."
"Because I'm your sister. You don't have to be alone Elsa, I'm here for you." Anna rested her back against Elsa's. "I know I have got a paper due tomorrow but I'm not gonna leave you like this."
"Don't waste your time with something that isn't important to you Anna. I'll get over it on my own." Elsa said, changing the tone of her voice more stern.
"But I can't just leave you like this and I'm not going to." Anna was starting to get a bit irritated.
Elsa dropped her head into her knees. "You can't help Anna, and I don't need you to."
"Dear lord we sound like broken records." Anna giggled and gave a small smile.
The room was silent for a while and the two of them sat back to back with each other. But Anna soon broke the silence. "Elsa, stop acting like everything in yours to handle alone." Anna said a stern yet kind tone. "There's always going to be some to help you when you need." Anna softened her voice. "And whether you need or not, I'm not leaving until you tell me what's going on. I'll always be here for you Elsa, you just have open the door and let me in"
"You won't understand." Elsa said dolefully.
"Then make me understand. I'm not going to be like mom Elsa."
Elsa fell silent and dropped her head into her knees. "Goodnight Anna."
Feeling defeated Anna let out a sigh. "Okay, Goodnight Elsa. We'll talk about this tomorrow." Anna turned around and hugged her sister. "You don't have to be afraid to open up yourself to me." Elsa remained silent and Anna got off the bed and picked her backpack. She walked to the door and looked back at Elsa.
Opening the door Anna was about to make her way back to her room when Elsa called her name. "Anna."
"Yah."
"Do you... do you think that everyone is meant to be with someone."
"You mean falling in love?"
"Yah."
"Of course I do Elsa. There will always be someone out there that can fall in love with you." Anna set her backpack down and got back on the bed with Elsa. "Why do you ask."
Elsa was silent for a second. "Because I've never had a long relationship with anyone."
"Well that makes two of Elsa, I've never had a relationship for more than a month."
"But that's where the similarities stop."
Anna raised an eyebrow. "Why?"
Once again Elsa fell silent. She felt butterflies in her stomach and tightened her arms around her legs. "Ever since I came out as gay I stopped going out with guys and girls entirely."
"Okay, then why do you have all these dates with people Elsa?"
"Because they're not really dates."
"Then what are they?"
"I don't want to lie Anna, but I can't tell you the truth."
Anna crawled in front of Elsa and sat on her knees. She lifted Elsa's chin and looked into Elsa's eyes. "You can tell me anything Elsa. I won't tell anyone anything and I'll never criticize you. Even if you tell me you killed the president I'll still love no matter what." Anna smiled and hugged her sister. "You don't have to be afraid."
"I'm not a virgin." Elsa whispered.
"Okay," Anna was at bit of a loss at what to say next. "So, you've done it with someone. Does that mean you're going out with them?"
"No."
"Then what are you saying Elsa?" Anna suddenly put two and two together. "Oh. I see what you're trying to say now." Anna sighed and let go of Elsa's chin.
Elsa lowered her head, disgraced at who she was. "I'm a terrible person Anna. I'm doing this more often than you think and every time I do it, I somehow feel worse." Elsa hugged her knees again. "What's wrong with me."
Anna wrapped her arms around Elsa. "Your just confused Elsa."
"I'm too young to be doing this Anna. It's disgusting, I'm disgusting." Elsa's voice echoed with misery and disappointment.
"We are too young Elsa. We have our entire lives to find someone we love. But it's up to us to find that person." Anna moved herself next to Elsa. "To frank with you, I want to have sex. I want to know what it feels like to be that close with someone. To share that intimate moment."
"That moment is gone Anna. Having sex now is just...pointless. But I still do it."
Anna was silent for a moment. "I don't want to sound like Mom or Dad Elsa but if this continues you're going to need help. Also I'm scared that you'll get sick with, you know."
Elsa grew silent. The two of them sat next to each other. Anna's left arm around her sisters shoulders. Elsa let go of her legs and rested her head against Anna's body.
Reaching across, Anna took Elsa's hand and held. "Anna, I want you to promise me something."
"Just say it, and I'll always keep."
"Promise me...promise me that no matter what happens to me that you'll remember these next few words from Mignon McLaughin."
"I promise Elsa. Fire away."
"Giving up doesn't always mean weakness, sometimes it means we were strong enough to let go."
Together Elsa and Anna sat in the moonlight room. Neither of them talked nor moved. It wasn't until Elsa remembered that her sister still had a paper to right. They both said goodnight to each other and said I love you. It wasn't until Anna left the room and closed the door that Elsa silently cried. She had told Anna the truth, but not the real truth.