Pop! Goes My Bubble
They say ignorance is bliss, but perhaps they're talking about tamer subjects than the one I'm dealing with.
School has been back for a week and I haven't even looked at Edward, let alone talk to him. Okay, that's a bull face lie. I did glance in his direction a time or two … hundred, but it was only to see if he was sneaking glances in my direction. Truth be told, for the first three days, I was torturing myself. He was like some kind of sick drug. A drug that I had depended on for over two years. A drug that I needed to quit. So I did…
It has now been two days since I have looked for him in the quarry or on my way to class. I have spent most of my time with my head down and in my books, and, if it wasn't for the retched nausea, I could have almost forgotten that the pregnancy or my night with Edward ever happened. Still, that's exactly what I have tried to do.
If the baby doesn't exist, then I don't have to tell my parents, or Edward. No one has to know. Sure, this theory might be slightly immature and I am probably going to pay for it in future, but it's what gets me through the days, and nights, so I stick with it.
Avoiding my parents has been so much easier than I thought it would be, thanks to the epic amount of homework I have brought home from school. But now that the weekend is here, I have no idea what excuses I am going to use to get out of 'family time.'
Thankfully, tonight I can still use school as my reason for going to bed at eight. If only I could sleep. The churning has been building up all week and now it's like a constant burning in the pit of my stomach. I have been laying in a foetal position for three hours, but it's not letting up.
I decide that maybe I need to go to the toilet, but when I stand up an intense stabbing pain hits me. Something isn't right.
Another wave of pain grips me and I fall to my knees. Groaning, I clutch at my stomach. The pain eases just as swiftly as it came, but another one comes almost immediately. I grab a hold of my bed and heave myself upright. I need to get help.
I can hear soft snoring before I'm even at their bedroom door. Making my way to my mum's side of the bed, I nearly fall on top of her as another intense wave of pain hits me. She sits up in fright and catches her breath.
"Izz? What's wrong, sweetie?" She leans over and switches on her bedside lamp.
My dad is stirring but the agonizing pain has all my attention. I grit my teeth and wait for it to die down again.
"Cramps," I manage to get out.
"Oh, honey, do you want me to get you some ibuprofen?"
My mum rubs her hand up down my arm to soothe me. I grab her hand and squeeze it in mine. Tears fall as I realise this is it. Time to burst the bubble. She needs to know.
"Mum." I look into her eyes and watch as they change from a look of concern, to one of panic when she sees my tears. "Mum, I'm pregnant and I think … I think I'm losing the baby."
The pain is constant now, but I can't tell if it's real pain or if it's now just a solidified pit of fear from the way my parents are looking at me.
"Izz? I – what the hell are you saying?"
Fresh tears stream down my face. I feel like I have just been through ten rounds with Mike Tyson. My whole being aches.
"Please, Mum, help me," I cry.
It takes them no more than five minutes to get dressed and get in the car. Within an hour of telling my parents my secret, I am lying on a hospital gurney waiting to hear the fate of my baby.