Sunday means more Breaking Bad Habits. Fluffy chapter ahead, o'hoy! I just love it, my favorite chapter so far. Dem feeeels!
And omg, over 100 followers!? I don't know what to say. Thank you, and thank you again. Writing wouldn't be nearly as fun without you guys.
I have a little gift for your you, a gift I've decided to call The Things You Do. It will contain a series of one-shots, some of which will have a direct or indirect connection to this fic. First chapter, a steamy Ruby+Graham one, is already posted, and it's taking place right after Breaking Bad Habits: Chapter 6.
Whatever you do, please enjoy. :-)
"You were right. This burger is delicious!" Killian stated after only a few bites.
"Try the mayonnaise," I said.
He removed the top bun from his burger and grabbed his fork. He was just about to add a spoonful of mayo to the beef when I interrupted him.
"Not on the burger, silly. It's fine as it is. Here," I said as I dipped a fry in the drop shaped porcelain bowl next to my plate.
I leaned forward to reach him the fry, but instead of taking it from my fingers, he let me know he wanted me to feed it to him by opening his mouth.
As you wish, I thought as he carefully bit the fried potato stick off close enough to my fingers for me to feel his soft lips brush against my skin.
"Verdict?"
"Amazing," he responded, not letting me go with his gaze.
"You don't eat a lot of burgers, do you?"
"I usually have dinner with my clients. Let's just say I need to match the quality of the menu with the size of their wallets."
With that tiny bit of information, I was able to add one and one together. Although he never denied it, it suddenly became almost too obvious; he had not been on a date earlier that Saturday, but on a business dinner.
"Taking them to a fast food restaurant might be worth it though, to see the reaction on their faces. Bet it would be priceless," I smiled cheerfully.
"If a burger is good enough for you, it should be more than good enough for them."
"Should I take that as a compliment?" I asked, a bit confused.
"You should indeed," he said, locking eyes with me for a short moment, before his burger regained his attention.
"Well, thanks for the company," I said as we'd left the diner.
"It was well worth getting out of bed for," Killian responded.
"Are you referring to me or the burger?"
"You were both exceeding my expectations," he smirked. "I'd really like to do this again sometime soon if you're up for it."
"Was that you asking me out?" I couldn't hide my excitement as the butterflies in my stomach made a forceful comeback.
"I believe it was," he said, taking my right hand in his, looking so deep into my eyes it felt like he was searching for my very soul. "There's something about you, Emma. I don't want to push you away by rushing things. Letting you take the first step was a deliberate move from my side. And now that you have, I want you to think things through carefully. I myself already know my answer to the question, but where do you want this to lead?"
"Killian," I said, swallowing what felt like a rough stone the size of a plum kernel. I wanted to tell him everything about myself, why I wasn't what one would call girlfriend material, I really did. But I wasn't sure how or where to begin.
"We don't have to do this now, love. I'm fine with baby steps if that's what you need. As long as you know I like you, and as long as you can visualize yourself somewhere down the road with me holding your hand."
"Baby steps sounds boring," I joked in an attempt to break the seriousness of the situation.
"Do you like turtles?"
"What's not to like. They're cute, slow but steady, and they wear their homes on their back," I laughed, not understanding why it mattered whether or not I liked shielded reptiles.
"Let's call it turtle steps then." He pressed his palm against mine, our fingers entwining, and pulled me in closer.
I let my cheek rest on Killian's shoulder, where I, when listening carefully, could distinguish the beat of his heart. Its steady and monotone rhythm was hypnotic. He embraced me with his free arm as he pressed his lips against the top of my head and took a deep breath, as though he was trying to inhale every last bit of shampoo scent out of my hair. It felt intimate without necessarily being intimacy in the truest sense of the word. I could feel him underneath of my skin, even though we were both fully dressed. I felt the high I only ever experienced when expecting something more to happen.
"You should get going, get yourself some sleep," he whispered, still not letting go of me. Not that I wanted him to, I could've stayed in that moment and position forever. "I'll follow you home."
"Yeah, about that," I said, breaking loose from his grip. "I kind of don't have a home right now."
He looked at me with an expression that begged me to continue.
"It flooded when I was making a rare attempt at bathing last night." I made a troubled grimace as I finished the sentence.
"So, where did you plan on sleeping? A bench?"
"I'm staying with Ruby, but she's got company tonight, and-"
"Love, you don't have to explain yourself to me. Stay with me for the night. You're already familiar with my bed, after all," he teased.
I hated accepting help when it wasn't really needed.
"I don't know Killian, I could just get a room somewhere. It's not a biggie. Besides, I've got to head downtown anyway to claim my car before it gets transported away."
I pictured my Beetle's windshield all covered in annoying, ridiculously expensive yellow tickets.
"But I thought your car -"
"Yeah, I lied."
"To get to spend more time with me? I'm flattered," he laughed before adding, "I will under no circumstances let you check in to a hotel when you could just as easily, and freely, stay with me. If you're renting a room, so am I. Lead the way, miss Swan."
"Are you for real?" I looked at him with big eyes, blinking both two and three times.
"Why don't you decide for your yourself," he said as he took a firm grip with his hands on the sides of my head, his gloved fingers finding their way through strands of blond hair.
He then planted a soft kiss on the tip of my nose, as to prepare me for what was to come, before he gently pressed his lips against mine. My reaction was delayed by a second, my mind unable to process what was actually happening. When I'd managed to collect my thoughts and make sense out of the situation, I closed my eyes and let Killian sweep away both me and the world surrounding us.
So much for turtle steps.
The tip of his tongue was tickling my upper lip, which made me smile into his mouth. With that smile, he found an opening and went straight for my own tongue, exploring its sensitive surface. I gave in to him completely, letting him take what he wanted, allowing myself to feel his every movement, moving along with him.
The kiss wasn't eager or desperate, but it was definitely passionate. I let out a quiet, barely audible moan of pleasure as I grasped my fingers around his silky hair and carefully scratched his scalp with my long nails. I could feel goosebumps forming on the skin on the back of his neck.
I didn't know a simple, yet otherworldly, kiss could feel that good.
"I've been wanting to do that since the first time I saw you," Killian said as our lips parted. The hot saliva on my lips turned cold in a matter of seconds in the chilly night.
Oh, you have no idea what I would like to do with you. I kept that thought to myself.
He seductively bit down on his lower lip, breathing almost as heavily as I was, although my breath was stuttering; out of surprise, out of shock, out of pleasure.
"So what's it gonna be, lass. My place or a hotel?"
He had won me over completely as I responded, "your bed's quite comfortable if I remember correctly."
"Damn straight it is," he laughed.
My Beetle could wait until Sunday's brunch, or until Monday when my next session with Dr. Hopper was scheduled. At least the tickets aggressively piling up on it were matching the car paint.
Killian left me alone in his living room as he went to the kitchen to brew us some coffee. I hadn't realized how tired I was until the coffee topic had been brought up. I yawned as I gave myself a tour in the big room, which frankly looked more like the lounge at some exclusive resort with its impressive roof height, huge marble fireplace and bright furnishing.
I hadn't been paying any attention to my surroundings the last time I'd been at Killian's place. Heck, I could barely remember having been there in the first place, a thought that made me flush out of embarrassment. No doubt Killian was a good man though, taking in a blond, drunken mess without intending to do something more with her.
Out of curiosity, I took a closer look at his large, white bookshelf. I guess he didn't read much as it was mostly filled with a variety of clutter; trophies with abbreviations which meanings I couldn't even guess, models of sailboats, decorative seashells, photos of Killian, photos of sailboats, photos of the ocean… a photo of her.
"Lass, you want milk or sugar in your coffee?" He called out from the kitchen.
"Black is fine," I shouted back as I took the photo in my hands.
Dark waves of hair framed her face perfectly, and her smile was beautiful. Big, green eyes were staring at me. It felt like they were saying 'stay the hell away from my fiancé', even though I knew that wasn't true. Killian was no one's fiancé anymore, and she couldn't possibly be any more silent. She was dead.
I shivered at the thought. His fiancée wasn't around anymore, but I had no idea as for how long she'd been gone. A couple of years perhaps, maybe longer.
"I hope you like percolator coffee," he said, his voice much closer this time. I quickly put the silvery frame back in the shelf.
"So, you sail?" I asked, already knowing the answer to my question, but I wanted Killian to tell me everything I'd found out through his mother's book proposal. It pained me to not be able to talk about it with him.
"Aye, I did," he responded as he handed me a generously sized mug, almost entirely filled up with coffee.
"You did, but you don't anymore?" I asked curiously.
The liquid was still too hot to enjoy, unless one likes blisters on their tongues.
"There's something I want to tell you. Sit down why don't you, love."
He motioned toward the room's centerpiece; a large, white sofa with countless of rectangular, equally white pillows. He parked himself in its middle, signaling me to take the seat to his right. Killian's hair almost looked black compared to our surroundings.
"Do you know anything about sailing?" He asked.
"Not more than that it requires a sailboat," I replied honestly.
"Let's keep it simple, then," he smiled. "I've been sailing since I was a little kid. My mother used to say the ocean was my blood, flowing inside my veins. On a sailboat was the only place I ever really felt free and at peace."
He paused to have a sip of coffee. I decided to let mine cool off a bit longer.
"I began sailing as a sport, entered competitions. At first small, local and national ones, and with the success that followed I advanced to the international championships. Won some trophies along with fame and respect."
"You're quite humble," I said. "For winning international championships."
He chuckled and I looked at him, confused.
"It's the first time anyone's ever called me that," he smirked, his eyes revealing how he was genuinely amused. "There's a first time for everything, I guess."
"If you were that successful, why did you stop?" I asked, eager for him to share the truth with me.
"I was in a car accident. Breaks wouldn't cooperate and I hit the back of a truck in 75 miles per hour. I am lucky to be alive," he said as he removed the thick leather watch from his left wrist which allowed me to see where the prosthesis met his arm. "My hand wasn't as lucky, though."
"Killian. I don't know what to say. I am sorry," I said, unsure what an appropriate reaction to what he'd just told me would be. It wasn't a surprise to me, after all. I'd had time to process the information inside of my head for almost a week, yet it didn't feel real up until that moment.
"I've learned to live with it, it hasn't hindered me the slightest. As I said, I was lucky, and this new hand of mine is a constant reminder of that."
And he claimed no one had ever called him humble before?
"I hope you don't mind me asking, but if your accident didn't hinder you, what did?"
He bit down on his lip and avoided looking at me altogether. He took a deep breath and released it in to a sigh, just as deep. "Do you believe in ghosts, Swan?"
"What?" I blurted. I was prepared to hear him say anything but that.
"Never mind. Let's just say the accident didn't hinder me physically. Mental scars did. Instead of sailing boats, I began selling them, and I soon realized it was a lucrative business. And here I am today," he explained, giving me a smile more fake than wrestling.
Killian wasn't going to tell me more that night, that much I was sure of. I couldn't blame him though; he had told me more about himself during those fifteen minutes than he had throughout the entire week, and I, if anyone, understood the phrase 'sensitive subject'.
"Oh wow, it's six AM," I said as I watched him put his wristwatch back on.
"You tired, love?" He asked, and I was finally able to recognize him again.
"Very," I responded truthfully.
"Let's get ourselves to bed then, shall we."
He rose, took the mug from me and placed it on the coffee table before taking my hand in his, leading me to his bedroom.
A one week younger version of myself would've had other stuff than sleep on her mind, but in that moment, I was perfectly content with just that. Besides, sleep would have been impossible if it wasn't for how safe and calm Killian's arm around my waist, along with his face buried in deep my neck, made me feel.
He kept planting small, soft kisses on my neck and shoulders until everything went black.
Turtle steps.
I wondered how much longer the autumn sun would bestow us with actual warmth as I sat at the outdoor serving, waiting for Ruby and Mary Margaret to show up. For once, I wasn't the last one to arrive for Sunday's brunch.
"Emma!" Mary Margaret waved at me as she approached. "We missed you last night."
She took a shortcut by stepping over the white wooden fencing surrounding the café and took a seating on the opposite side of the table.
"Before you say anything else; I am sorry for my no-show."
"Where were you though?" A worrisome expression spread across her face.
"With Killian," I smiled.
"No way!" The voice of Ruby exclaimed behind me before she entered my field of vision and sat down next to Mary Margaret. "You've got to tell us everything!"
"Hello to you too, Ruby," Mary Margaret laughed.
"Why don't you go first," I winked at her. I was dying to hear if my assumptions about her and Graham had been correct.
"Graham and I went home to my place and uncorked a bottle. We talked, laughed… friend stuff, you know. I owned him at Mario Cart."
The corners of her mouth were defying gravity as she spoke, and I could tell from the sparkle in her eyes that more than 'friend stuff' had occurred.
"And then?" Mary Margaret asked, her head tilted.
"Let's just say I'm surprised we woke up before noon," Ruby giggled.
"Sounds like you enjoyed yourself, doll," I teased her.
"You have no idea," she smirked. "We're going on an actual date next week. I couldn't possibly be any more excited."
"Aw Ruby, you're glowing! We're so happy for you!" Mary Margaret said and placed her hand on Ruby's shoulder.
"Now, tell us everything about your night, Emma," Ruby said as four eyes turned their focus toward me.
"Well… We talked."
"Oh, and here I thought you were both mute," Mary Margaret teased.
"He kissed me," I added and I could see how their faces lit up. "I followed him home, we talked some more, and then we went to bed. And that's about it. Not nearly as exciting as Ruby's night."
"He didn't even try anything?" Ruby asked, surprised.
"We've agreed on taking things slow. That's what we both need, I believe," I told them.
"But you are taking things somewhere at least," Mary Margaret stated.
"I think we are."
I couldn't contain my happiness as I uttered those four little words. I hadn't felt like this for a long time; I hadn't felt anything for almost as long. I had been hiding behind casual relationships and one night stands to feed my numbness, to avoid getting hurt, and most importantly to not have to open myself up. This time, it was different. I wanted to open myself up, I wanted to be honest, and I wanted anything and everything Killian had to offer me. I wanted to allow myself love, and I could literally feel how that door had been unlocked. I wanted to become a better version of myself.
I was aware it was going to be a somewhat bumpy ride, but I was willing to be honest with Killian to make this thing work, and I believed he felt the same way.
Like/dislike? Will Killian be able to help Emma get back on track again, and will Emma be able to help Killian let go of his "ghosts"? Are their definition of 'turtle steps' somewhat different from what someone else's would be?
All reviews are highly appreciated! :-)
Also, don't forget to check out The Things You Do if you enjoy steamy stuff.