They stayed at Lily's cabin for a few more days while they started pulling together more information on Dick Roman. Dean put in another call to Frank Devereaux and was waiting to hear back from him.
As Lily gradually pulled out of the depths of her grief over losing the baby, she began to notice certain things again. Things that had been troubling her before. Dean's drinking. Sam's hallucinations. They were back. Had they gone away? Or had she been so wrapped up in her loss that she simply didn't notice?
A case in Portland ended up landing them smack in the middle of a leviathan plot. Dean was suspicious of some local deaths and had Frank look into a real estate company who was trying to buy out a block of local shops. It turned out that the company was linked to Richard Roman Enterprises.
After coming face-to-face with a couple of chompers, they went to see Frank. When they got out of the car, they could hear music playing loudly from inside Frank's trailer. Dean called out for him not to shoot, that they were coming in. When Dean stepped inside, there was blood everywhere. Frank's computers were smashed. Lily and Sam stepped in and took in the scene.
"Oh my God..." Lily gasped.
"Not good," Dean said.
They went back to Lily's cabin to think things out. The first thing Dean did was pour himself a drink.
"Dean..." Lily started to fuss.
"What?" Dean knew what she wanted. He had seen her disapproving looks every time he picked up a drink.
"Nothing. It's late. I'm going to bed."
Lily dozed for a couple of hours, tossing and turning, never quite falling asleep. She turned over in bed to find Dean's side empty. Her stomach was making hungry noises, so she decided to get a snack before trying to sleep again.
She was only a little surprised to find Sam in the kitchen. She looked out into the living area at the empty sofa.
"Where's Dean?" she asked.
Sam shook his head. "I thought he was in your room."
Lily panicked for a moment, thinking he had gone off to a bar to get completely wasted, until she saw his shoes by the front door. She went upstairs to the guest bedrooms and found Dean passed out across one of the beds. She ran a hand across his forehead, and he moved just slightly in his sleep. As she leaned down to kiss his cheek, she could smell the alcohol.
She went back down to Sam and noticed the coffee pot was almost empty.
"Was that a full pot?"
"Uh, yeah. It was."
"Sam, when was the last time you slept?"
"I'm fine."
"That's not what I asked."
"Four days ago," Sam admitted.
"You can't keep this up."
"It's not like I haven't tried to sleep, Lily. Lucifer won't let me. My brain won't turn off the noise."
Lily sighed. "I don't know how much more we can take. The level of constant crap we get thrown at us is beyond ridiculous."
"Tell me about it. You want coffee?"
"Sure. Why not? It's not like I'm sitting here 'cause I was having trouble sleeping, or anything. I may as well join you."
Sam poured Lily a mug of coffee and handed her the cream and sugar. As she added what she liked, she thought about what they were all going through.
"Sam?"
"Yeah?"
"Does Dean know how bad it really is? Your hallucinations, I mean."
"I haven't been keeping it a secret. He knows."
"So, you haven't been down-playing it? At all?"
Sam shifted uncomfortably. "Maybe a little."
"Sam..."
"Look, I know... Okay? But you've seen him lately. He hasn't been handling things very well."
"No, he hasn't... But who has?"
Lily drained the rest of her coffee and went to Sam. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and he hugged her back.
"Do me a favor?" she asked.
"Sure."
"Go lie down. Your body is probably so exhausted that you'll fall asleep once the caffeine wears off." When he didn't answer she got desperate. "For me? Please, Sam?"
"Okay. I'll go lie down."
She squeezed him tightly. "Thank you." She broke their hug and kissed him on the forehead. "Good night."
"Good night, Lily."
Lily woke the next morning and went into the kitchen. Evidence of her late night talk with Sam sat in the sink. At least he had kept his promise to go lie down. Lily washed out the coffee pot and started to make fresh. She had just sat down on the sofa with her mug when Dean came down the stairs, looking very disheveled. They stared at each other for a moment, both silently acknowledging the fact that he had stayed in a guest room last night.
"Coffee?" Dean asked. His voice was hoarse and deep. A night of too much whiskey and not enough sleep.
Lily pointed to the kitchen and watched as Dean poured himself a cup. She was glad to see him drinking something other than liquor, but it hurt when he sat at the breakfast bar, facing away from her.
"Is there a reason you didn't come to bed last night?"
"Wasn't in the mood for a lecture. Still not," he said over his shoulder.
"When have I ever lectured you?"
"I can feel it comin'."
"Bull shit!" Lily stood and walked up behind Dean. He turned to her with a surprised look on his face. Lily never yelled. She seldom swore. "You didn't wanna face me after almost drinking yourself into a stupor! I'm so tired of this, Dean! I haven't wanted to say anything. I know you're hurting, but we're all hurting! And your brother hasn't slept in four days!" Lily looked toward the stairs and realized that if Sam had fallen asleep, her yelling would wake him up. Dean took her moment of silence to jump in the argument .
"What the hell do you want me to do?!"
"Shhh! Sam might be sleeping."
Dean looked toward the stairs, then back at Lily. His voice was calmer. "I don't know what to do anymore, okay? I'm just trying to stay alive to take out Dick Roman and his leviathan buddies."
"And being wasted is the way to do that," she said sarcastically.
Dean shot her a disdainful smile. "Lecture."
Lily balled up her fists at her sides. They didn't need this right now. None of them. They couldn't let themselves be torn apart, but dammit he was pissing her off.
She was about to bite back, but Dean's phone began to ring. He was all too eager to answer it and get away from the argument. She watched as his eyes shot toward the stairs, and his face fell before he ran up. She followed him to Sam's room. Sam wasn't there. When he hung up, his face was full of worry.
"What's wrong?" Lily asked.
"Sam was hit by a car."
"Oh my God!"
"He's in the hospital. We gotta go."
"Let's go."