Welcome Aboard

Cast: (Selena, Beruka, Laslow, Peri, Odin and Niles)
Prompt: The Awakening retainers first meet their new coworkers

"So you're Beruka, aren't you? Lady Camilla's new retainer?"

"… Yes." Beruka did not look up from polishing her axe.

Selena scoffed. "I don't get it. You try to kill Lady Camilla, and she just hires you. Just like that!"

Beruka already did not care for this noisy girl. "That is what happened, yes."

"I had to work my butt off fighting all those tough knights to prove myself. How tough are you, anyway?"

"If you'd recall, I successfully infiltrated the castle and nearly executed Princess Camilla."

The red-haired girl awkwardly looked away. "Oh, well, I guess that's true… Wait, you were an assassin, right? I'm not judging, my dad was one too. But what I wanna know is why you ride a dragon, and why you carry that big axe. How sneaky is that?!"

Beruka sighed. "When your mission is to eliminate someone, it's best to make absolutely sure they're dead." She stopped polishing and inspected her axe. "It's easy to tell whether or not someone's dead, with an axe."

"Wait, what about the dragon? And that reminds me, Lady Camilla said your armor used to belong to her? How does that even work? Gods, she must've hit the puberty jackpot!"

"I was born in February. She was born in the November afterward."

"Huh? You look so young though…"

Beruka went back to her task. "Have you no other business? I don't like conversations."

This just made the twintail-haired girl scowl. "Oh, well sorry I'm such a bother! Fine, I know when I'm not wanted!"

Selena was about to storm off, but then Beruka looked up. "Wait."

"Now what?!"

"… I apologize. I didn't mean that you were annoying." Beruka found her quite annoying, but that was not her reason. "There was no deeper meaning. I just sincerely dislike having conversations."

"I-is that so?" Selena grew somewhat embarrassed. "Well… apology accepted. And… sorry about picking at you."

"You've served Lady Camilla for some time. It's natural you would be suspicious of someone you'd be expected to work with out of nowhere. Especially given my… entrance."

"That reminds me, I'm still freaked out you managed to get in Lady Camilla's room without me knowing! Mind sharing some of your secrets?"

"I would, actually."

"Oh, all right! But I wanna spar against you soon! I should know how you fight!"

"… Fair enough."

Selena finally smiled. She would not let herself be inferior to this new retainer. She would be the best retainer Lady Camilla had ever recruited, past, present, and future. And she would make sure everyone knew it.

"Ah, you must be Peri," Laslow said as he greeted the woman with oddly-colored hair. "So Prince Xander took a liking to you as well, I see."

"Yep! I've killed a lot, so it was easy to fight in that tournament!"

Laslow was taken aback by this blunt statement, but did not let it show. "Yes, well, better our new lord has guards whom know what they're doing, right?"

"Yeah. Lord Xander's nice, I sure hope nothing bad ever happens to him! But I guess that's what we're for!"

Laslow nodded. "Yes, we've been given a great responsibility." He cleared his throat. "Well, what say we get to know each other better before we report in tomorrow? I've heard of a lovely café nearby…"

Pleased with the idea, Peri closed her eyes and smiled. "Okay! I'm thirsty anyway."

"Marvelous! I've been meaning to check it out anyway." He winked. "I hear their server doubles as a maid!"

Peri's eyes shot back open. "Maid…"

"Er, perhaps not the best time to bring that up…" the mercenary nervously admitted.

"I can't go after all."

Laslow's smile turned upside-down. "Really? Fear not, my attention will not stray from our conversation. Not with a face as wonderfully unique as yours!"

"No, it's not you. I'm in a support group for angry people, and if I keep looking at that maid… I'm gonna stab her."

Laslow jolted. "Wh-what? D-did I mishear you? Stab her?"

"Yuh-huh!" Peri chirped.

"Uh… Well, we could still go somewhere else…" Laslow desperately tried to salvage this conversation. "It need not be a café, just so long as we may enjoy each other's company!"

The newly appointed cavalier considered this for a moment. "Hmm… Okay! But you have to stop trying to flirt with me! I don't like it."

"O-oh, is that… you thought…" He sighed. "I confess. That was my intention. But even so, I do wish to get to know my new colleague."

Peri nodded. "Okay. Let's go then, buddy!"

It was time for Odin to introduce himself to his new coworker. As luck would have it, he was sitting in the halls, eating a sandwich. Time for his glorious first impression. "Greetings, fellow servant! I am the chosen hero from the darkest depths! The moon itself was severed to proclaim my fell birth! I… am Odin Dark!"

Niles merely blinked (winked, technically) as his new coworker struck a pose. "Cowed by my malefic aura? Fear not, friend. I shall restrain my spell hand. You need not- Hey, come back!" Odin dropped his pose, as Niles simply walked away. "I wasn't done reassuring you!"

"This is a waste of time. Didn't Lord Leo give you some… errand or something?"

"Ah, yes! He has tasked me with seeking the fabled Stone of Agony! Said to be found deep within a forgotten house, controlled by men cursed to bear the form of spiders!" Odin explained. "I just thought I'd say hi first!"

Niles narrowed his eye, unsure of what to make of Odin's going in and out of theatrics whenever the sorcerer had finished his sentences.

"Uh, would you like to join me in this quest? You shall be my fateful ally: Zero, Devourer of Delectable Foods!"

"What are you talking about?"

"I mean, Niles is a nice name, but it just doesn't have any… oomph!"

What Odin did not know was that Niles was privy to Leo's distaste for the bombastic mage. This 'Stone of Agony' was made up on the spot, in an attempt to get Odin to leave and never come back, and he fell for it. As such, Niles could only say one thing to Odin.

"I think I'll pass," Niles said. "But tell you what: look real hard for the Stone of… whatever. Because if you don't find it, well… I'm sure Lord Leo wouldn't like that."

Odin grimaced. "Er, no, I suppose he wouldn't…"

"So you should get cracking on that 'quest' of yours. It'd be a shame if you couldn't finish it…" Niles warned implicitly. Odin gulped.

"Well… it appears Odin Dark's reputation precedes him, and has raised the bar for his lord's expectations. But just as well, I shall not let him down!" Odin struck another pose. "And upon the completion of this quest, perhaps maybe then you'd see fit to join me on my next one? Turns out Lord Leo has a bunch of these lined up!"

Niles began to crack up, but restrained himself for Odin's sake. "Sure… Odin. Heh! If you find that- snrk!- magical rock, I'll help you find the next thing…!"

The dark mage nodded. "Very well. Wish me success! I look forward to getting the chance to work with you, o Zero, Devourer of Delectable Foods!"

"Niles."

"I look forward to getting the chance to work with you, o Niles, Devourer of Delectable Foods!"

The outlaw shook his head. "… Close enough."

A/N:

One time I wondered how Selena, Laslow and Odin would react to their psychotic new coworkers. The end result is a little more down-to-earth, but it was still a fun plot bunny.

The timeline is that Niles was there first, then the trio joined, Peri came in at the same time as Laslow, and Beruka came last.

Also find the Zelda reference in this chapter. It's pretty easy to find, honestly.

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