Reference to and dialogue from: 'The Agreement Dissection'
Reference to: 'The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation';
xTBBTx
If it was possible to still his heart and yet still live Sheldon would have been in that position as he looked at the readings. Since the brief power outage he was worried he lost the incoming data but he didn't.
What he did do, however, was change the face of physics.
"I did it!" he gasped aloud.
"Did what?" asked Raj as he paused the dvd.
Sheldon turned in the wooden chair to face his companions.
"Gentlemen," he said excitedly. "I've found the monopole."
"No way!" gushed Raj as both Howard and he dashed to stand beside Sheldon and see the data for themselves.
"It looks as though we got the power back on just in time," said Howard as he looked at the time stamp. "The monopole made her appearance at oh seven thirty eight this morning."
"We need to celebrate," said Raj as he crossed over to the kitchen. "I'll make some hot cocoa with cream and marshmallows."
"I have to get an email off to the university," said Sheldon as he opened his Outlook and began to type.
"Just imagine: I'll be an honored footnote for the moment our concept of the universe changed," sighed Raj as he pulled out the can opener and opened the can of cocoa.
"Not changed as much as confirmed," Sheldon amended as he checked the data and added it to his email. "Leonard scoffed at my twenty six dimensions. Who's laughing now?"
He went to click 'send' and then remembered he should add the constant numbers to make a comparison. As he looked back at the data he glanced at the new readings and his jaw dropped.
"There it is again!" he said excitedly.
"Wow," said Howard. "Who knew there'd be so many monopoles out there?"
"This is so exciting!" giggled Raj as he opened the can of sweetened condensed milk.
"Perhaps all we needed was the right frequency to look," mused Sheldon. "That there are so many of them must— Again!"
"Really?" said Howard. He looked at the time stamp. "Interesting."
"Very much so," agreed Sheldon. He clicked back to his email.
"Sheldon, you mind if I do an experiment of my own before you send that?" Howard said.
"Well, I don't know what you could possibly do to make this day any more monumental but alright."
Howard read over the numbers to confirm his suspicions. Satisfied, he stood back into the center of the room and bowed.
"As Raj knows I have a fascination with magic," he began.
"Hokum," replied Sheldon as he turned his chair around.
"Just work with me. One of the earliest tricks was making things appear and disappear. For instance, I can go to Raj's ear and—voila!" Howard seemingly pulled a quarter from the astrophysicist's ear.
"You tickle when you do that!" snorted Raj.
"Simple sleight of hand," scoffed Sheldon.
"A disbeliever, Raj," tsked Howard. "Well then, I suppose I should make this more scientific to pique his interest." He flexed and cracked his fingers. "Gentlemen, I shall make a magnetic monopole appear." He turned to his best friend. "Raj, if you could give me a can. Any can will do." Raj obliged. Howard then went to Sheldon. "If you'd be so kind as to examine the can to see if it is, in fact, an ordinary can." Sheldon took the can and checked it. "Is the gentleman satisfied?"
"He is," agreed Sheldon.
"Alright. Raj, if you'd be so kind as to open the can on my signal," said Howard as he tossed the can to his friend. He checked his watch. "On my signal. Seven thirty seven and fifty six seconds. Fifty eight. Fifty nine. Now!"
The can opened whirred and then stopped.
Howard stepped forward and gave a deep bow.
"You realize this is two minutes of my life I'll never get back," tutted Sheldon.
"Now wait. Like David Blaine my trick isn't over until the big discovery," said Howard. "Sheldon, check your readings."
"I really have no idea what you aim to prove beyond…."
There was another monopole reading.
Sheldon turned wide-eyed to Howard
"How did—" gasped Sheldon. "I mean you…." His mind whirred into overdrive as he recalled Raj opening the can at exactly seven thirty eight. Sheldon checked the time stamp on the new monopole reading.
Seven thirty eight.
"How did you know?" Sheldon asked quietly.
"Two things," said Howard. "One, I actually read the experiment overview you printed up and realized that finding a single monopole would be like finding a needle in a haystack during a tornado. So when you found a second one I couldn't get over the odds of that happening so I thought to myself why now? Why would another one appear? Then the power outage last night came to mind—ahem, that's my engineering coming to play thank you very much—and so I wanted to check the timestamp on the first reading. Sure enough, it was at breakfast. The last time we used the can opener. My best guess is that we have some kind of short. I'll grab Jonathan from the next camp and we'll get it fixed."
The room was silent.
"So much for my Nobel Prize," said Sheldon as he clicked to his email and erased it.
"Well you can still write a paper," grinned Raj. "'Monopole Fabrication By Way of Electric Can Opener Fluctuations'." Sheldon snorted.
The lanky man looked to Howard as the engineer slid into his boots and tied them.
"Howard," he began.
"Yes Sheldon?"
"You've managed to do something I never thought you capable of doing had we an infinite number of lifetimes."
"Sheldon, I might 'only' have a Masters degree but I'm good at my job," Howard frowned.
"I've never said you weren't good at what you did," replied Sheldon. "What I'm saying is that your trick has me thinking that not all magic is hokum."
"Believe you Muggle," the engineer winked before pulling up his hood and venturing outside.
xTBBTx
Penny,
Enclosed as a .pdf you will find an itinerary of my travels in Ontario. Pay particular attention to the Toronto portion as we will be spending a significant amount of time at The Silver Snail.
Bowel movements occurred at 7:55 am and 7:50 pm.
The outside temperature was -20F and we had 18.36 hours of sunlight in which to work.
I haven't found the monopole. I shall recalibrate the detector tomorrow.
Thirty seven.
Regards, Dr. Sheldon Cooper
Penny's eyes returned to the number.
"Thirty seven what?" she murmured as she clicked to reply.
xTBBTx
Stephanie, Penny, Bernadette and Amy were huddled on the couch with heartfelt expressions on their faces and damp tissues in hand as they watched the final moments of the movie.
Alone in his stuffed chair Leonard stared at the ceiling counting the seconds until the torture ended.
"It's you," the romantic lead said to his love interest as she drove off in a cab. The background music changed and Leonard knew by the sound and the 'awwws' and sniffles that the women were in nirvana. He closed his eyes and continued singing the Adam West Bat-Man song in his head.
The credits began to roll and Penny gave a loud sniffle.
"That was so sad," she sighed.
Stephanie blew her nose. "I know."
And yet so romantic, gushed Bernadette as she wiped her eyes.
"This might even trump Madame Curie and her husband for best love story," agreed Amy wistfully. She turned to Leonard. "What do you think?"
Four sets of eyes were on him.
"It was…. Well, you know how it was. I mean you saw it." Leonard gestured at the tv. "It was what we saw and what we saw was so positively—"
"Baffling with bullshit, bub," snorted Penny.
"No, what's baffling is why she went after him even after he blows her off," said Leonard. "I mean it's obvious he didn't want her and yet at the end I'm supposed to believe that he does?"
"Because he did want her," sniffled Bernadette. "He just didn't know how to say he did."
Leonard smirked at his girlfriend. "So I can treat you badly and ignore you and you'd be cool with that?"
"I dunno if she'd be cool but you'd definitely be cold," said Amy. "Once the heart stops the body cools rather rapidly."
"Well, I've gotta get me off to bed if I'm gonna make that audition tomorrow," said Penny as she stood.
"And check her email before bed," teased Bernadette.
"OooOOoOoo," went the three women, causing Penny to roll her eyes.
"Yeah, yeah. 'Night guys," she grinned and exited the apartment.
As soon as she closed her door Penny bee-lined to her computer and logged on. It was a luxury having a password that didn't change from week to week.
She clicked to her inbox and there it was:
Penny,
Bowel movements occurred at 7:55 am and 7:50 pm.
The outside temperature was -21F and we had 18.37 hours of sunlight in which to work.
I haven't found the monopole. I shall recalibrate the detector tomorrow.
To answer your question, the number indicates how many days until you are in Toronto.
Just so you'll know.
Thirty six.
Regards, Dr. Sheldon Cooper
xTBBTx
Sheldon finished packing his duffle bag and tied the end closed.
"Gentlemen, we have forty five minutes until the plane arrives," he said as he stared at Howard with a bit of a frown. "Howard, chop chop."
"Just a minute," mumbled the engineer as he continued working on whatever it was at the kitchen counter.
Sheldon came over to see what had his friend's—although he'd never publically admit to it, Howard's actions had him replace Leonard as the tertiary friend behind Penny and Amy—attention.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
Howard held up a large bear claw.
"I'm piercing a hole through this so I can make it into a necklace for Bernie. You know, to remember the trip."
"But we never encountered a polar bear."
"No," agreed Howard as he changed the bit on the micro-drill. "But we saw some. Besides the claw came from an Inuit guide and you can't get much more 'north' than that."
"I suppose," mused Sheldon. "Although I'm puzzled as to why you'd want to give the claw to Bernadette when you are the one who went to the Pole."
"I think it's romantic," gushed Raj as he folded his long underwear and packed it in his duffle bag.
"How is the gift of a claw from a fifteen hundred pound carnivore in any way 'romantic'?" asked Sheldon. "It's not like Howard defended his life against one."
Howard gave the drill a steady pulse and made the hole before turning it off.
"Think of it this way," said Raj. "We're at a spot in the world where most people will never see. And even though we drove each other nuts I still have to say I don't regret coming." He smiled through his grizzled beard. "We've been in a magic land and all Howard wants to do is give Bernadette a taste of that magic."
"I see," nodded Sheldon.
He walked to the porthole window and looked outside at the white landscape beyond.
xTBBTx
The gang sans Sheldon sat in the living room at 4A chatting away after eating. Priya, Raj's sister, happened to be in town on business and so dropped in to see her brother after his trip to the Great White North.
"To non-reconstituted food!" toasted Howard before Raj and he clinked beer bottles.
"It's the little things," agreed Raj as he reclined against the side of the couch. He looked to Leonard. "By the way, I like what you've done with the place. The accent pillows make the couch 'pop' and that heavenly smell—wintergreen pot pourrie?"
"Rose petals and wintergreen," grinned Stephanie as she took a sip of wine in Leonard's stuffed chair.
Raj wiggled his eyebrows. "I happen to make my own."
"Really?"
"Oh yes," his sister Priya said with a crooked smile. "Mother assumed he was going into flower arranging. Then when he found Howard we thought it was destiny like Haroun and Tanweer."
"We're not like Haroun and Tanweer!" Raj said adamantly with a blush.
"Well as long as Leonard gets the place back to the lemony freshness of Mr. Clean before Sheldon gets home all will be well," soothed Howard.
"Leonard could always come live with me," offered Stephanie, causing Leonard to choke on his water. "You okay, honey?" She rubbed his back as he leaned forward in his computer chair.
"Yeah," he gasped. "Not that it wouldn't be a good thing moving in, you know, together. It's just that this place is close to the university." He grasped at straws. "Besides it'd be murder getting out the Roommate Agreement."
"What's that?" asked Priya.
"A formal document Sheldon wrote up outlining the rights and responsibilities of roommatehood."
"Yeah he made me one for friendship, too," agreed Penny.
Priya was intrigued. "Now those I'd love to see."
Leonard went to his desk drawer and pulled out the Agreement.
"It's quite technical," he said as he handed it to her.
"Leonard, she's a lawyer," tutted Raj.
"Actually, it's quite vague," said Priya as she flipped through the pages.
Leonard raised an eyebrow. "Seventy three pages is 'vague'?"
"It's not specific enough," explained Priya. "For instance, section seven on the right to enter the bathroom in emergency situations is not specific as to what constitutes an emergency."
Penny raised an eyebrow. "Isn't it obvious what he means?"
"If you were late for work and remembered that your mascara was in the bathroom, would you call that an emergency and slip in while Sheldon was showering to grab it?"
"I guess."
"The legal principle is ambiguity in a contract benefits the party that did not draft it." She handed the Agreement to an awestruck Leonard. "In this case, Leonard."
"How much would it cost to have you go over the Agreement?" he said excitedly.
Priya grinned. "Well, you can pay for my dinner for starters."
xTBBTx
Sheldon exited the hotel washroom in his blue plaid housecoat and pajamas and went to his bed. He moved the pillow to the headboard and settled himself in an upright position. Placing his laptop on his thighs he made to open it but instead veritably slumped against his pillow and closed his eyes. He was positively exhausted. After three months in the Arctic and the late nights at the SNOlab in Sudbury his body was on the verge of collapse. And for what?
He didn't find the magnetic monopole.
His Nobel Prize still eluded him.
Penny wasn't here.
"At least one of these is rectified shortly," he mumbled as he opened his laptop. Stifling a yawn he logged onto the free wifi and checked his email.
Subject: All ready Sarge!
Hey there!
Everything's set. Got the tickets and Amy is gonna drive me to the airport.
I read up on the Bata Museum. I am gonna walk your ass off in there! So many shoes. So little time.
Oh, btw I read up on your 'Silver Snail'. You're dragging me to Canada so we can go to a comic shop? That deserves at least one pair of shoes as compensation! ;)
See you soon! XXX P
Sheldon's eyes lingered on the three X's. In baseball it would indicate that he had struck out but that seemed unlikely in this instance. After all they weren't playing a game. At least he wasn't at any rate. That Penny agreed to join him meant that at worst she found his company agreeable, but platonic.
The physicist couldn't dispute that he missed her. At times he found himself thinking about the incomplete door knocks. Her annoying high-pitched laugh. The way she called him 'sweetie' and sang 'Soft Kitty'.
Sheldon still didn't know if he 'liked' her.
He just knew that he wanted her here.
Penny, he typed.
Bowel movements occurred at 7:55 am and 7:50 pm….
xTBBTx
"So have you ever been to Toronto before?" asked Bernadette as Amy and she sat on Penny's bed watching the waitress pack her suitcase.
"Never been to Canada, period," replied Penny.
"They're a friendly bunch," said Amy. "Although they do have a rather unhealthy obsession with Tim Hortons."
"What's that?"
"A hot beverage establishment. A colleague of mine had cans of their coffee shipped to her." Amy cocked her head. "And had a weird habit of saying 'rrroll up the rrrim to win'."
"I'll have to try it," said Penny as she folded her pajamas and tucked them in the suitcase. "I've looked up stuff and besides the shoe museum I wanna hit Kensington Market and Queen Street."
"You've added them to the itinerary?"
Penny snorted. "You better believe it. No way Dr. Protocol is gonna stand between me and vintage clothing shops." She went to her closet and pulled out a couple of tops. "Man, I can't wait to go."
"You mean you can't wait to see Toronto or can't wait to see Sheldon?" Bernadette asked slyly.
Penny turned to her friend with a blush on her face.
"OoooOOooo," said Bernadette and Amy.
"Yeah, whatever," Penny said and packed her tops.
"So do you think Sheldon missed you?" asked Bernadette.
"I think so. He kept track of the days until I get there."
"OooOOooo."
"Of course he also let me know about his bowel movements so take that as you will," chuckled Penny as she went to her drawer for socks.
"He was relating intimate details," said Amy.
"Yeah well there's intimate and then just gross."
"He must be a delight when he's sick," Bernadette smirked.
Penny made a face. "Yeah he was constantly telling me what color his boogers were."
Amy nodded. "Color often indicates—"
"Gross Amy."
"It's only biology, Penny."
Penny's phone rang. "Yeah well there's a difference finding 'biology' in a Petrie dish and another hoarked into a Kleenex." She answered. "Hello?"
"Hello," said Sheldon and Penny instantly knew that something was wrong.
"What's up?"
"Things are not going according to plan. The last phase of the experiment I'm working on won't finish until Saturday morning."
"That sucks."
"Indeed. As you'll be in Toronto Thursday I thought I'd send you some links for local attractions."
"Don't worry about it. I'm sure I'll find something to pass the time. You sure you still want to do this? I mean I can get a refund—"
"Penny, we planned this. You booked time off work and I want to see…Toronto."
Penny grinned. "Yeah. I wanna see Toronto too. Okay, I'll text ya when I get there. Good luck with your experiment thingie."
"There's no such thing as luck. Goodnight, Penny."
"Bye." Penny hung up and she sighed.
"Problems?" asked Amy.
"His experiment ran over so he won't be free until Saturday. That means I'll be by myself for a day."
"Unless you surprise him," offered Amy.
"What do you mean?"
Amy pulled out her phone. "Rent a car and go up. It's only four and a half hours to Sudbury from Toronto."
Penny grinned. "Sounds like a plan. Only I don't know where he's staying."
"Not a problem. He logged his itinerary on his Facebook page." Amy scrolled. "And we have an address."
"Okay, no telling him I'm coming," said Penny. "I want it to be a surprise."
"He'll still be busy with work," Bernadette reminded her.
"I know. It's just that…." Penny pumpkin grinned.
"OOoooOOoo," all three women cooed before laughing.
xTBBTx
"Man, these roads are crap," mumbled Penny as did her best to avoid the pot holes. It might be a rental car with 'walk-away' insurance but she still didn't want the hassle of getting another vehicle when time was tight.
The highway signs indicated a drop in speed as Sudbury came into view. From what she read on the sign its population was around one hundred and fifty thousand and from the bilingual 'Welcome' sign the population also spoke French.
The GPS made a beep signaling a direction change and Penny turned onto a main thoroughfare and made her way downtown. It was just after dinnertime so she hoped that Sheldon would be in his room. One nice thing about an anal retentive neighbor was that she could pin down his routine. At home ten o'clock was bedtime so there was no doubt he'd try to adhere to that.
She again turned at a roadway to the hospital, science center and university and found the hotel. After finding a spot in the parking lot she took out her suitcase and wheeled it to the lobby.
"Hello," said the concierge amiably.
"Hi," Penny smiled. "I'm looking for Dr. Sheldon Cooper's room."
Immediately the young man's face scrunched into a frown.
"Dr. Cooper's in room nine," he said flatly. "Although from what I've learned he doesn't want to be disturbed."
"Don't worry, I'll be quiet," winked Penny.
"Please do. Otherwise I'll hear about it in the morning."
Penny again smiled, although this one was more strained, and made her way down the hall.
"Definitely the right place," she said to herself as the smell of 'clean' came to the forefront as she arrived at room nine. Before she knocked she felt a moment of unease as she rethought the plan. Sheldon didn't do well with surprises. He might be royally pissed at this idea.
"Ah well, too late now," she shrugged and knocked out her incomplete 'shave and a haircut'.
There was a pause before two knocks were heard on the other side and the door opened to reveal her neighbor in his robot evolution t-shirt, blue thermal and khaki pants.
"What are you doing here?" he asked.
Penny cocked her head. "Why Penny! How nice to see you! Please, come in!"
Sheldon paused before giving a slight nod and stood back to let her enter.
Immediately Penny was inundated with the familiar smell of Lysol lemon antibacterial cleanser as she wheeled her suitcase into the room.
"So," she said as she turned to him and opened her arms wide.
"You're going to maul me again, aren't you?" he said with a slight smirk.
"Non optional, Sheldon."
She waved him in with her hands and to her surprise he obliged although he was stroke stiff and his arms remained at his sides. Penny took in the smell of talc as she lay her cheek against his chest and squeezed.
"God, I missed you," she sighed before leaning back to regard her friend.
"Oh," said Sheldon after a moment. "You require a reciprocation of sentiment." His eyes took in the top of her head, reacquainting himself with the strands of Penny's blonde locks. "Your absence was noted as it was abnormally quiet."
Penny chuckled. "Man, you're a sentimental slob." She released him and sat on the bed. "So how are things going? You almost finished?"
"We're working in double shifts to get the project completed," said the physicist. "I've already made it clear that Saturday morning is as late as I can stay."
"Okay."
"I should be back about four thirty in the morning." He checked his watch. "Speaking of which I have to be downstairs shortly for my ride to the lab."
"That's cool."
"I'm not sure what there is to do in Sudbury. Aside from a capable comic book store I can't really say it offers much, hence the reason why I suggested staying in Toronto."
"No biggie. I'll watch tv or something."
"Very well." Sheldon slung his messenger bag across his body and took up his laptop bag. "I'll see about procuring you a room."
"Don't do that. I'll stay here."
Sheldon blanched. "You can't stay here."
"Why not?"
"It's my room."
"Nice try," smirked Penny. "Your room's in Pasadena. This is a hotel room."
"But there's only one bed."
"We'll do it in shifts. I'll sleep there until you get home."
"But this is my bed. Your germs would be on my sheets and that's unacceptable."
"Fine. I'll sleep on the floor. No biggie."
Sheldon sighed. "Very well. I sleep until noon. Do not disturb me until then."
"You got it, boss."
He went to the door and paused.
"Don't let me sleep past noon. It'll give us time to 'hang out' until I have to go back to work."
Penny smiled. "No problem."
"You know I've had four chaos-free months and in a span of an incomplete door knock you've turned my life upside down."
"You're welcome," she said sweetly.
Sheldon snorted and exited the room.
XxX
Sheldon turned the lock and entered his room to the sound of Penny's snoring.
"Good Lord," he murmured.
He made note of where Penny was sleeping before closing the door and tentatively stepped his way to his bedside and turned on the lamp.
"Sheldon?" Penny said groggily.
"Yes. Go back to sleep," he said softly.
"'Kay." She turned over and did just that.
Sheldon took his pajamas into the washroom and changed before completing his nighttime ritual. When he opened the door his eyes caught the awkward way in which Penny was sleeping. How her hair crossed her cheek.
Leaving two towels for himself he took the rest of the rolls and went to her side. Gently he tucked them here and there to give her proper support. It wasn't the best but it was the best he could do at the moment short of transferring her to his bed and that was just madness.
He turned off the bathroom light and went to bed. As he lay between the sheets Penny's soft snoring began and he let out a little sigh.
"Even asleep she's still annoying," he murmured.
He closed his eyes and slept.
xTBBTx
"Sheldon."
Silence.
Penny smiled at his sleeping form, all Dracula-like with a sleep mask. God, does he ever relax?
"Sheldon," she tried again.
"Danger! Danger!" cried Sheldon as he sudden sprang to a sitting position.
"Whoa! Relax!" she soothed as he took off his sleep mask.
"What are you doing?" he said groggily.
"You said wake you at noon. Well it's noon."
"No it's not. He checked the time on the clock. It's eleven fifty seven."
"This isn't one of those anal things again, is it?" smirked Penny before retreating to a chair and sat.
"I'm precise," sniffed Sheldon before lying back in bed.
"So you're just going to lie there for three minutes?"
"It's not twelve o'clock." He closed his eyes and took a breath. "I'd like to remind you that this isn't 'Anything Can Happen Thursday'. I have a routine to follow and—" He let out a gasp as he felt something streak up the sole of his foot. "Penny!"
"Sorry. Just checking for the switch."
Sheldon pursed his lips. "Contrary to popular opinion I am an organic life form."
"Not that you're happy about that."
"Not particularly, no, but I am a realist." He turned to his clock. Eleven fifty eight.
Penny caught his movement and she glanced at the clock. With a shake of the head she moved to the side of the bed and grabbed a hold of his blankets.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"Just getting ready," she said innocently.
"Penny, I'm more than capable of getting out of bed myself," Sheldon tutted.
"Call it a perk of having a roommate."
"Leonard doesn't wake me up."
"That's because he's chicken."
They turned to the clock. Eleven fifty nine.
"Remind me to get you a room for tonight," said Sheldon as he took up his own grip on the blankets.
"Don't you dare waste your money," frowned Penny. "We're checking out tomorrow morning."
"Yes, but your behavior leaves me no other choice."
"Sure it does," said Penny as she glanced at the clock. "Ya just gotta suck it up."
Twelve o'clock.
In one motion Penny threw back the blankets even as Sheldon did his best to remain covered.
"Good morning, good mOrning," sang Penny intentionally off-key as they struggled.
"Penny, I have to stretch," Sheldon chided.
"You're stretching now."
"No, I'm being accosted," he growled as he yanked his legs to a fetal position as Penny flipped the ends of the blankets over in search of his feet.
"Ah, it's good for your cardio," she giggled. She reached up the blanket. "Here piggy, wiggy."
"Actually the largest percentage of heart attacks occurs in the morning." Realizing he was in a losing battle he tossed away the rest of the blankets. "There! I'm awake and alert!" he twanged.
"About time," snorted Penny. "Look, it's twelve oh two already." She gave a pumpkin grin to counter his glare. "I'll be in the lounge while you get ready."
"Familiarize yourself with it. You may be sleeping there tonight."
Penny chuckled. "Anyone ever tell you you're a grump in the morning?" She grabbed her purse. "Now go make yourself beautiful and I'll see ya down there."
Sheldon waited for the door to close before he got up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. Obviously he didn't need to do a vocal test or stretch.
It felt weird. Incomplete.
He cleared his throat and began to wiggle his shoulders.
"Vocal test. Morning vocal test."
Sheldon glanced at the clock. Twelve oh four. He still had to shower and wash up. His bowel movement wouldn't be for another twenty five minutes. He still needed to eat breakfast.
Penny was downstairs.
They had four hours and twenty six minutes until he went back to work.
"Second vocal test," he said as he marched into the bathroom and closed the door.
xTBBTx
Penny's eyes brightened as she saw all of the tropical trees and plants in a brightly lit area.
"Butterflies," she cooed.
"We have butterflies in California," replied Sheldon.
"Look, this was your idea to do this Science North tour." She put on a smug smile. "I'm your guest and as such you have to humor me."
He raised an eyebrow. "No, you're an uninvited intruder who's taken half of my hotel room."
"Oh quit being a fuddy-duddy." She noted some children enter the exhibit. "Hey, you can go into the butterfly room!"
"I'll wait here."
"Nice try." She grabbed his wrist and dragged him into the exhibit.
"Penny, I didn't take my allergy pill this morning. Who knows what plants I could be allergic to," he protested.
"I'll risk it," she chuckled.
Sheldon let her move him into the center of the room before he tugged his wrist away from her grip. Penny turned and winked at him before going over to the foliage to see the butterflies. He noted how easily she interacted with people as she chatted with a parent before beginning a game of spot the butterfly with a five year old girl.
People gravitated to Penny whereas all Sheldon ever felt from others was an urgency to leave his presence.
And yet Penny was here with him.
"Sheldon, come over here," Penny called.
"I can see them from here," he replied.
Just then a little boy stepped into the foliage and shook some leaves startling dozens of butterflies. Everyone 'ooo'ed and 'ah'ed as they took to the air and scattered.
Sheldon ducked his head as the cloud went by but a few of the butterflies nevertheless sought refuge on the lanky physicist.
"Sheldon, smile," Penny said and he turned to see her with phone in hand.
He let her take her picture before he shook his arms and waved his hands over his head.
Penny checked the photo and grinned. Covered in butterflies Sheldon still managed to pull off one of his patented Cooper scowls.
"Perfect," she said lightly as the pair exited the exhibit.
"So you say," he grumbled. "I'm covered in Lepidoptera germs."
"I don't think there's been a case of butterfly-to-man infection."
"Doesn't mean I can't be the first."
Penny snorted. "Well I'll let you know if you sprout wings."
"More likely than not my skin cells will secrete a sticky substance that will form a chrysalis so my digestive enzymes can digest my body and reshape it into a demi-human," Sheldon said evenly as the pair ascended a large spiral staircase that wound itself around the skeleton of a blue whale.
"You know, that has to be one of the grossest things I've ever heard," Penny said as she made a face.
"Biology is rarely pretty," he agreed. "How Amy and Bernadette can get excited over slimy things I'll never know."
They came up to a floor with a wide variety of mechanical exhibits.
"Excellent. The physics floor," Sheldon said with a smile. "Granted the experiments are unsophisticated but the basic principles are there. I'm sure even someone with a tenuous grasp of science like yourself could get the gist."
"Being as asshat again," she warned with a smile on her face and a sparkle to her eyes.
"How am I being rude? I'm merely saying that— Look." He walked over to a machine with two disks, one on top of the other, with a buzzer on top. "Now spin the buzzer around the disk and listen."
Penny did so.
"And?" she asked.
"Penny focus. Listen to how the sound waves change as it moves."
She spun it again.
"Okay, it gets quiet the farther away it is from me and louder as it gets closer," she said.
"The Doppler Effect," Sheldon said. "What you're hearing is the stretching and compression of sound waves." He turned to her. "nneeEERRroo."
Penny laughed. "So the question to the Jeopardy answer of the Doppler Effect is 'What is nneeEERRroo?'"
"Exactly," nodded Sheldon.
"Fascinating."
"Well, I don't know if it's fascinating but it is at least noteworthy."
Penny's eye caught what looked like a giant ball made of bars in the distance with a man strapped in the middle spinning away.
"Now that's my kinda physics!" she cooed and walked towards it.
"It's a gyroscope," said Sheldon as he increased his pace to catch up. "It simulates the gyroscopic forces astronauts must face when training to control tumbling spacecraft."
"Yeah, yeah, we're going on it," Penny said cheerily.
"Oh yay," Sheldon muttered under his breath.
XxX
It was prevening as Sheldon and Penny walked outside the science center along the boardwalk that circled Ramsey Lake.
"I can't believe you ate that," Sheldon said distastefully.
"Poutine rocks," Penny grinned. "French fries and cheese curds with gravy on top." She nudged his arm. "Besides, I'm a tourist; I have to sample the local cuisine."
"Well I'm glad we're not in Mexico where they eat escamoles, the larvae of the—"
"That's okay!" Penny said quickly. "I'll stick to poutine."
He shook his head. "Poutine could be part of the reason why Sudbury's cardiac rate is so high."
Penny shook her head in amusement as they walked. Although it was cool, Spring was most definitely in the air as various trees were budding.
"Neat that they have pussy willows here, too," Penny said. "Mom cuts some branches for the kitchen table. I used to pet the little fuzzies."
"Salix discolor. Indigenous to Canada and the Northern States."
"So none in Galveston?"
"We're known for tree sculptures carved from tree trunks. They're all over the place."
"Carved like what?"
"Dolphins, dalmations, mermaids, angels. Any subject, really."
"Sounds cool."
"I suppose."
"What I remember the most growing up was the annual fall fair," mused Penny. "All the animals and rides and yummy food."
"Mother would drag us off to amusement parks when we were children." Sheldon looked out across the lake. "Meemaw and Pop-Pop came with us the year before he…." Pause. "Missy wanted to go on rides and whatnot but all I wanted to do was go home. I'd just found the periodic table of the elements and I spent my time pouring over it and then going through the house finding as many elements as I could." Pause. "Mother was about to paddle me for not going on the spinning cups with Missy when Pop-Pop took my hand. 'We're goin' tuh get some helium,' he said. I was excited and happily babbled to him helium's properties as we walked."
Penny turned her head to look at her friend. Sheldon's tone was even-keeled but she could feel the intimacy of the moment.
"He bought two helium balloons. He tied one to my wrist and we went to a bench and sat." Pause. "I thought the other balloon was for Missy but instead Pop-Pop untied it and inhaled a good gulp of helium and then spoke to me. He offered me the balloon and I inhaled and talked."
"Sounds awesome," Penny said softly. She could imagine little Shelly and his grandfather talking and laughing on a bench while the rest of the world went by. No wonder Pop-Pop was so important to Sheldon. Penny bet that the older man was probably the first person Sheldon ever connected with where it counted. Someone who understood him.
Penny heard him take a deep breath and she moved over and lightly nudged his arm with her own. Almost immediately Sheldon straightened and cleared his throat.
"The North Pole is four thousand eight hundred and forty eight kilometers from here," he said with a bit of a twang. "The SNOlab has a permanent team on Ellesmere Island which is eight hundred miles south of the magnetic North Pole."
Penny put out a hand to stop him.
"You're not saying you want to stay here," she said in what she hoped was a steady voice.
"Good Lord, no," he said adamantly. "I was just commenting on how close we are to the Pole."
"Don't scare me like that," Penny said, relieved.
"Still, it was quite beautiful up there. Quiet." He snorted. "And colder than a witch's tit as my father would say."
They resumed walking.
"You better have a ton of pictures," said Penny.
"I have enough," agreed Sheldon. "However pictures don't quite capture its essence." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a clear block and handed it to Penny. "This does."
"What is it?" she asked as she held it up to get a better look. At the very center she could see a small crystallized form.
"A snowflake from the North Pole preserved in a one percent solution of polyvinyl acetal resin."
Penny was floored. "It's beautiful," she said softly. "Thank you. Thanks for everything."
"'Everything' is rather vast. I merely gave you a snowflake not given birth to you," he tutted.
"No, but you brought me here."
"Actually you came here yourself." Penny stuck out her tongue. "Quaint," he said with a smirk. He glanced at the ground before his eyes flicked to her face. "This afternoon has been f-u-n." Blue eyes met green. "I'm glad you're here."
Penny beamed. "Couldn't imagine being anywhere else, Dr. C."
He nodded and then checked his watch.
"We have to head back if I'm to make it to work on time," he said.
"I can drive you," she said quickly and blushed as he stared curiously at her. "You know, if you want."
"That would be acceptable."
The pair turned around and began their walk back to shore.
XxX
The car went past a gate and Penny followed the road until it came to a large building. She pulled in front and turned to her passenger.
"So this is the infamous SNOlab?" she asked.
"No, SNOlab's two kilometers beneath the surface in what was the Creighton Mine," replied Sheldon as he undid his seatbelt.
"Wow. Why down there?"
"Some experiments require great depths to reduce cosmogenic backgrounds to acceptable levels." He saw her blank look. "They're trying to look for a specific station on the radio and are doing their best to eliminate the static." He got out of the car and opened the rear door.
"Oh, okay." She smirked. "They should have put that in the tour book."
Sheldon regarded her over the seat. "They don't offer tours. Unless you're suggesting you want one?"
Penny shrugged. "I doubt I'd understand it. Besides, you've got work to do."
"I didn't bring you to the Arctic; the very least I can do is introduce you to the universe."
"What the heck." She put the car in gear and parked in the visitor lot before returning to Sheldon.
"Of course what you see here remains here," he warned her as they neared the building.
"I doubt I'd be able to explain what I'm seeing even if I was being tortured," Penny chuckled.
"Good." He opened the door. "Dr. Gionet and I are working on building a slow moving monopole detector. My equipment was not sensitive enough and this should rectify the problem." He pulled out a card and swiped the sensor before opening the door.
"Shouldn't I sign in or something?"
"Penny, this is a neutrino lab not a nuclear facility. Besides, you're not going into the lab proper."
They walked down a long corridor.
"Okay, so why are you looking for these monopoles?" asked Penny.
"James Clerk Maxwell formulated his famous four equations describing electromagnetism. His equations are 'asymmetrical'—electricity has an electron monopole and a proton monopole, each with opposite charge, but magnetism does not. Pierre Curie hypothesized that magnetic monopoles might exist but it was Paul Dirac who provided the real mathematical heft for the idea. He showed that if one quantized electric charges, then the existence of monopoles was consistent with Maxwell's equations. In other words, monopoles could exist at the ends of long tubes carrying magnetic fields called 'Dirac strings'."
Penny snorted. "Well I'm glad that clears things up. Bazinga."
Sheldon again used his swipe card and they entered a lab with an assortment of weird equipment. It reminded Penny of Leonard's lab except for the boards of math doodles and diagrams posted all over the place. It all looked rather chaotic to her but Sheldon seemed to maneuver himself quite freely through it all and so she followed.
"My area of interest is string theory, and string theory also predicts the existence of magnetic monopoles," Sheldon explained. "If we find a monopole it would provide a key piece of experimental evidence to support string theory for a Grand Unified Theory meshing general relativity with quantum mechanics."
"So it'd make all your math real."
"My 'math' is real," he asserted. "But yeah."
"Cool."
The door opened and a man in his mid-thirties sporting a goatee and moustache entered.
"Well this is a surprise," he said and smiled. "You didn't tell me this was a take your wife to work day. Marc Gionet."
"Penny isn't my wife, she's my friend," amended Sheldon. "Since she's being gracious enough to give up a day of sightseeing in Toronto to be here I thought why not show her what's taken up my attention."
"I see," said Marc. "So what do you think?"
"To be honest I don't know what to think," admitted Penny. "I mean I'm just stunned that there's a whole building built to find monopoles and yet I never heard of them before now."
"Magnetic monopoles, and no, we're just a little lab squared away in a little corner of this facility. SNOlab's bread and butter are neutrinos and the search for dark matter. Now that Dr. Underhill found the first evidence for it we know where to hone our search."
Penny looked to Sheldon. "He means Dave Underhill?"
"Yes," Sheldon said with a tight jaw.
"Wow."
"It was luck," Sheldon sniffed. "He happened to be looking at a particular spot on a gigantic photo and voila—dark matter. I could replicate his 'science' by tossing a dart at a picture of a group of galaxies."
"Well I can see this is more than a stab in the dark," Penny said diplomatically.
"It employs Cherenkov radiation," said Sheldon as he went to the board and drew a circle.
"It's okay Sheldon, you don't have to explain it."
He raised an eyebrow. "So you know what Cherenkov radiation is?"
"Of course not."
"Then I need to explain." He continued to draw. "Now this small dot is a direct neutrino which we'll call 'A'."
Penny looked helplessly at Marc who grinned even as he shrugged his shoulders.
XxX
Penny unlocked the door and entered the hotel room. All the way back to the hotel her mind went over what she learned at the SNOlab. Granted a lot of parts were as boring as her science classes at high school but what she did get from all of it was the difference between Sheldon and her. As much as she teased him about not going out and living life she realized that he could equally tease her about not knowing life. What they were doing at the lab was more than she'd ever done in her life.
She slipped off her shoes and refreshed herself in the washroom before changing into her pajamas. As she went to the bed she noticed fresh bedding on the pillow and a note on top in Sheldon's hand:
Penny,
You may use the bed with the understanding that I will return at 4:30am at which time you will rise and we'll change the bedding.
Regards, Dr. Sheldon Cooper
Penny chuckled as she moved the bedding to a side table and snuggled into bed to watch tv.
XxX
Sheldon quietly slipped into the hotel room and turned on the bedside lamp.
"Penny, I'm back," he said as he took out a fresh pair of pajamas from the drawer and went into the washroom for his shower. After he was clean, dry and dressed he finished his bedtime routine and returned to the main room and Penny's light snoring.
"Penny," he said again. "It's nearly five and I'd like to go to bed."
"'Kay," Penny mumbled and rolled over to make room for him and returned to sleep.
The physicist pursed his lips and pondered his predicament before taking up the clean bedding and lay the bottom sheet on the floor beside the bed. He went to the washroom and retrieved some fresh towels and rolled them up before turning off the light and settling himself on the floor.
xTBBTx
Snolabca: About SNOlab
Newsdiscoverycom: On the Trail of Magnetic Monopoles
Physikrwthaachen: On the Detection of Subrelativistic Magnetic Monopoles with the IceCube Neutrino Observatory