Reference to and dialogue from: 'The Pants Alternative'; 'The Speckerman Recurrence'; 'The Pulled Groin Extrapolation'; 'The Werewolf Transformation'; 'The Desperation Emanation'
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Sheldon opened the apartment door to find the gang sans Amy eating dinner.
"Excuse my tardiness friends. Dr. Hofstadter," he added as he put on his house slippers.
"'Sup?" said Leonard before taking a sip of water.
"'Sup," replied Sheldon. He took off his jacket and went to clean his hands.
"You guys still not talking?" asked Bernadette.
"Oh, we're talking. Only we're supposed to be all formal since we apparently aren't friends because I won't sign the stupid Roommate Agreement," sighed Leonard.
"Roommate Agreement?" asked Joyce.
"A binding document outlining the rights and responsibilities each roommate has while living in this apartment," said Sheldon as he came down the hall.
Joyce looked to Leonard. "That doesn't sound so bad."
"Obviously you've never had to schedule your number twos in writing," chuckled Howard.
"Really?" gasped Joyce.
"As a bright side you won't have to fill out paperwork to have a woman over," Raj said to Leonard.
"Paperwork?" grinned Joyce.
"Yes, paperwork," tutted Sheldon "Now can we change the subject?" He sat in his spot and grabbed his box of Chinese food.
"So Leonard tells us you've gotten some kind of award?" said Penny with her mouth full.
"There's a rumor that I'm to receive the Chancellor's Medal for science, yes."
"Congratulations!" squeaked Bernadette.
"Premature," countered Sheldon. "It's merely rumor and-"
The phone rang. Sheldon picked it up.
"Huh. It's President Siebert."
"Totally psychic," said Penny.
"We're not starting that again, are we?" sighed Sheldon before answering. "Good evening President Siebert...why thank you...oh. What if I don't want to make a speech?... Ah. I see. Alright, I guess I have no other choice...Thank you. Goodnight." Sheldon hung up the phone and looked to his friends. "Apparently I'm being awarded the Chancellor's Medal for science."
"Congratulations buddy," gushed Raj.
"Although I seem to be in a pickle."
"Oh?" asked Leonard.
"Apparently receiving the medal requires me to deliver a speech at the President's Dinner. I don't give speeches."
Howard laughed. "Like hell you don't give speeches. You gave us a five minute spiel at lunch about why chocolate pudding is the best."
"We are a group of four," explained Sheldon. "At the dinner there will be more than thirty six adults."
"What's wrong with that?" asked Penny.
"There's enough people to trample me to death."
"They won't trample you, Sheldon," Leonard said with a smile. Now this sounds like the Sheldon I know.
"Besides, you deserve the award, right?" prompted Penny.
"Of course," Sheldon sniffed.
"Then go get it."
"You make it sound easy," Sheldon said with pursed lips.
Penny smiled kindly. "It's easy peasy, Dr. C. If you want something badly enough then it's worth the pain."
Sheldon paused as he took in Penny before speaking.
"You're right," he said, trying desperately to keep from twitching. "The chances of there being a fire or earthquake are relatively minor." He put on a brave smile and a tic moved his lips. "It's just an award. No biggie." Sheldon took a bite of his chicken satay.
Howard turned to Raj.
"Remind me to look for the pod in Sheldon's office," he said.
"What pod?" asked the astrophysicist.
"The one that switched Sheldons."
XxX
Sheldon closed his bedroom door and took off his housecoat and hung it up before retiring to his bed. He got in between the sheets and then leaned over to his nightstand and pulled out his journal. Today had been eventful. He'd won the Chancellor's Medal for science and he was going to give a speech. Penny was right: he did want the award so change was necessary.
Hadn't Amy said something similar regarding Penny?
The physicist shook his head. All this emphasis on change. He hated it. And yet everything he wanted seemed to require it.
"Suck it up, Dr. C," he murmured and opened the journal to the last page. He took up the pen but found himself unable to write as his hand was shaking. He set down the pen and tried unsuccessfully to take a deep breath.
A hundred people in the crowd.
He sat forward, resting his elbows on his drawn up knees and did his best to breathe.
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Leonard sat in his stuffed chair watching television with a frown on his face. Something was definitely going on with Sheldon far beyond the normal amount of crazy that emanated from the lanky physicist. Still, Penny didn't seem to be concerned or at least she kept her feelings to herself. He'd have to ask her opinion. Sheldon didn't just order a hamburger or view an award and speech as 'no biggie' and he most definitely wouldn't get up on a Saturday so he could go-
The phone rang and Leonard hit the mute button on the remote before answering.
"Hello?" he said.
"Good morning. It's Amy Farrah Fowler looking for Sheldon."
"He's not here."
"I've tried his cell phone but he's not answering."
"His cell phone's here. He didn't need it since he went jogging with Penny."
"Jogging? Fascinating."
"Amy, what's going on?"
"I don't know what you mean."
"Sheldon doesn't jog. Heck he rarely takes the stairs."
"Perhaps he's turning over a new leaf?"
"Unless it's a marijuana leaf I don't buy it."
"Clearly we're at an impasse. Tell Sheldon to contact me later. Goodbye."
Leonard pursed his lips as he hung up and put the phone back in its cradle.
"New leaf," he muttered. Something must have happened on the Arctic trip to trigger this transformation. That, or the cancellation of the Roommate Agreement really threw Sheldon for a loop.
"I will not break. There's no way I'm going to sign that stupid thing even if Sheldon goes-"
The door opened and an exhausted Sheldon wearing a Green Arrow t-shirt over a red thermal and plaid walking shorts entered the apartment.
"Well that was some workout," he said as he sprayed the bottoms of his shoes before crossing over to the hall. "I'll have to rehydrate and have a shower."
"You sure you're okay?"
"Dr. Hofstadter, I've never felt better." Sheldon disappeared around the corner.
Leonard shrugged and unmuted the television. Minutes turned into a half hour and there still wasn't the sound of running water from the washroom. He turned off the television and went down the hall to Sheldon's room.
"Sheldon?" he asked tentatively.
Silence.
"Sheldon?" Leonard pushed open his roommate's door to find Sheldon asleep belly side down on the bed. His shoes were still on.
Leonard stood a moment in thought before silently closing the door.
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Penny got up and stretched. Last night with Gwen was fun and well needed since it'd been a dog's age since she'd been out dancing. Granted, not getting plastered did take some of the fun out of it but she found that waking up to a hangover and wondering who was in her bed was something she didn't miss. Besides, she was kinda sorta seeing someone although not really.
"Man, I need a life," Penny snorted as she tossed back the covers and got out of bed.
After using the washroom and running her fingers through her hair to get it past the bedhead look she went into the kitchen for her coffee mug.
"Thank God Leonard gets up later on Saturday," she sighed happily and after grabbing her keys she went to 4A.
Upon knocking and opening the door she was shocked to see a strange man sitting on the couch. He was broad shouldered although a little bit on the fluffy side. Across the way in the kitchen were Leonard and Sheldon, both of whom looked extremely uncomfortable. Normally Penny would have excused herself but something told her to stay.
"Is that French toast?" she said cheerily as she came in. She looked to the stranger. "Hey, I'm Penny."
"Jimmy," the man replied, stunned at the presence of a blonde hottie in Leonard's apartment.
"Coffee's ready," Leonard said in what Penny instantly picked up as mock enthusiasm.
"You better get some," said Jimmy. "Nancy makes a great cup of Joe."
"Nancy?" asked Penny as she crossed over to Leonard and held out her mug.
"I used to call him that in high school," chuckled Jimmy.
"For three years," mumbled Leonard under his breath.
Before Penny could ask Sheldon had his milk carton in hand and deftly poured some into her cup.
"Thanks," she said.
"Perhaps you'd better go," Sheldon said as he glanced over her shoulder at Jimmy. Penny took a sip of coffee and gave an icy smirk.
"And miss out talking to ol' Jimmy here?" She went to Sheldon's computer chair and rolled it by Leonard's chair and sat. "So," she said to Jimmy. "You're a friend of Leonard's?"
"If by friend you mean the bane of his adolescent existence then yes," said Sheldon.
Jimmy laughed. "Nancy and I were a comedy pair, always joking around."
"You made him floss with his own shoelaces," Sheldon said testily.
"You should have seen this guy back in the day," chuckled Jimmy. "He was so little he could fit in just about anywhere. Lockers, trash cans. Oh, man, how did you get inside that backpack?"
"You helped," Leonard said with a frown.
"Speaking of helping." Penny got up from her seat and went to the counter where she set down her mug. "Sorry you won't be here for breakfast, Jimmy."
Jimmy smirked. "Actually Nancy said-"
"I don't think you heard me," said Penny as she took the hot frying pan off the stove and unceremoniously dumped the two well-done pieces of French toast on the counter before heading over to Jimmy. "I said, you're leaving."
Jimmy might not have known a lot but he did recognize a 'don't mess with me' look when he saw one.
"Maybe I'll shove off," Jimmy said as he quickly popped off the couch and darted for the door. "I'll see ya around, Nancy."
"Not now. Not ever," growled Penny who charged at the big man. Jimmy tore open the door and both Penny and he disappeared around the corner.
Sheldon and Leonard rushed to the door just as a laughing Penny came up the stairs to their floor.
"For a big guy he can sure move his ass," she chuckled.
"Penny, you have to quit chasing people down the stairs with blunt instruments," Sheldon scolded.
"Yeah, whatever." She handed Leonard the frying pan. "You realize you owe me breakfast for this."
"Yes, Ma'am," Leonard piped.
"Let me grab my mom's strawberry jam. You'll love it," she said and went to her door.
Leonard went to the kitchen and put the frying pan under the tap to clean it off.
"Penny's amazing," he gushed. "She's funny, beautiful-"
"And lethal," said Sheldon.
"But that's just a part of her charm." Leonard smiled. "Good thing we agreed I wasn't her gay friend because if she ever changed her mi-ouch!" Leonard turned, his right shoulder blade smarting from a chop to the back, to see Sheldon behind him with a grave look on his face. "What the hell, Sheldon? I was joking!"
"Penny is not for you," Sheldon said evenly although his eyes were furious. "I repeat, not for you."
He stomped down the hall into the washroom.
Penny entered the apartment with the jam.
"Where's Sheldon?" she asked.
"Beats the hell out of me," said Leonard. "But the guy I live with is in the can."
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Leonard's eyes brightened as he entered the lobby to see Penny at the mailbox.
"Penny wait," he said and made his way over.
"What's up, buttercup?" she replied as she looked through her mail.
"I just wanted your opinion on Sheldon," he said while unlocking his mail box. "He seems a little off."
"Yeah that hamburger thing really weirded me out," she agreed.
"And how giving a speech is 'no big deal' even after the trampling comment."
"You noticed the twitches, huh?" Penny with a tight smile.
"More tics than a lyme disease research lab. But it's not just that, he's changed Halo night and plays vintage games whenever and had pizza from a non-Sheldon approved restaurant and just this morning I noticed his poop chart was gone from the fridge."
Penny's eyes widened in surprise. "Seriously? He practically runs his day off that thing." She cocked her head in thought. "And speaking of run I couldn't believe he went jogging with me."
"How did that go?"
"We got about three blocks before he needed a breather," Penny smirked. "We ended up walking more than running but he did give it the college try at the end."
Leonard frowned. "Didn't you ask him why he wanted to jog?"
"Didn't think to. All I asked was if he was sure since I've never seen him run," replied Penny. "I thought it was weird but then again he does weird things, y'know?" Now it was Penny's turn to frown. "Only not weird enough to move the poop chart."
"When I asked what happened to it he said 'what's life without a little whimsy?'"
Penny pursed her lips. "Maybe I should call his mom."
The lobby door opened and Sheldon entered with his messenger bag strung across his body.
"Good afternoon Penny," he said evenly as he went to the mail box.
"I've got the mail," Leonard said as he held up the bundle in his hand.
"You do recall that the Roommate Agreement has been dissolved?" Sheldon reminded him. "As such you're tampering with my mail."
"For God's sake, Sheldon," said Leonard with an exasperated sigh.
"It's not God, Dr. Hofstadter, it's the U.S. Government." Sheldon turned his attention to his neighbor. "Given your shift rotation at the restaurant I believe this is your weekend off is it not?"
"Yup," Penny said warily.
"Good." Sheldon went to the elevator and pushed the button. "I was thinking we could take in Hearst Castle. Drive down Saturday, have a light lunch before sightseeing, a night at a bed and breakfast and then have a leisurely stroll on the coast before the return trip. My treat. Of course you'll have to do the driving."
"I, uh, sure," stammered the waitress as the elevator doors opened. "Sheldon?" He paused. "Is this a date?"
"Isn't it obvious?" he said matter-of-factly and stepped into the elevator.
Leonard and Penny watched the doors close before turning to stare at each other.
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Amy poured herself a half glass of cranberry juice and cut it with ice water. She was puzzling over her phone call with Penny. Apparently Sheldon had asked her on a 'date' and instead of being excited Penny seemed disconcerted. The waitress went over her list of concerns regarding the physicist and became suspicious when Amy suggested that perhaps Sheldon was merely expanding his horizons. To ease tension the neurobiologist agreed to talk to Sheldon and see what was up with him.
She sat down on her couch and put the drink on the coaster beside her laptop. After the dinner at the Cheesecake Factory three weeks ago Amy hadn't seen Sheldon apart from Skype calls due to the busy schedule of her addiction study. Admittedly, some of what Penny told her about him was surprising. Throwing caution to the wind ordering a hamburger was one thing but casually stopping his daily fecal records was something else entirely given that he'd kept track since he was potty trained.
"It seems Penny is a better catalyst for change than chocolate," Amy quipped as she clicked the link to Skype Sheldon.
"Why good evening Amy," said Sheldon cheerily before tossing his head to the right. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"I heard from Penny last night regarding your plans for this weekend. I admit I was surprised you didn't go over them with me."
"I decided to be spontaneous." He blew upwards to move the hair on his brow.
"I see. And how did it make you feel?"
"It's not really my type of outing but from what I've researched combined with my knowledge of Penny I'm confident it will be successful." Again he tossed his head.
"You're avoiding the question." Amy gave a slight frown. "And why do you keep tossing your head?"
"My barber was away when I went to get my hair cut and I took that as a sign that perhaps I should grow it out."
"A 'sign'?"
"Penny's always going on about her mumbo-jumbo psychics but there is something liberating about going with the flow." A boyish smile came to his face. "You know, I can't even predict my bowel movements some days?" Again he blew at his bangs.
Amy didn't like this. "Sheldon, perhaps we should put Project Gorilla on a temporary hiatus."
The physicist's smile vanished. "Why?"
"I just want to make sure you're not, what's the clinical term, going ga-ga."
Sheldon shook his head derisively. "Nonsense. Everything's fine." He blew on his bangs. "Now if you'll excuse me I've got to shower and put on my Friday pajamas."
"But it's Thursday."
Sheldon wiggled his eyebrows. "I know, huh?"
The screen went black and Amy's frown and pursed lips were reflected on the darkened monitor.
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As he walked through the Glendale Galleria Sheldon was hunched over his phone making sure he had everything on his list. He had begun an antibiotic regiment the night before and had packed his allergy medication, polysporin, extra hand sanitizer, antibacterial wipes and mini emergency disaster kit in his overnight bag. All that remained was his apparel and according to a plethora of web sites and his observation of Penny's previous suitors he was in a serious need of change.
Sheldon came to a halt in front of Jean Machine. Although Amy had suggested wearing jeans to 'show off his butt' since Penny indicated he had a 'nice one' he felt something deep inside scream out a resounding 'no!' at the idea.
He hated jeans.
Penny liked jeans.
Sheldon liked Penny.
Sheldon needed a pair of jeans?
"What kind of logic is that?" he snorted. "Penny also likes sun tanning on the roof. Should I expose myself to potential melanoma just to fit in? Psh, Dr. Cooper."
And yet he didn't move from his spot in front of the store.
He had two doctorates and a Masters degree. There was no doubt intellectually he was a 'catch'.
But he also had Asperger's.
At least he thought he did. His mother never said anything nor followed up with the specialist in Houston, yet Sheldon knew there had to be something wrong for him not grasping certain things like sarcasm and lying. He had an I.Q. of one hundred and eighty seven for goodness sake; this wasn't a case of being too stupid to 'get it'. It took him a while to think things through because he was afraid of making a mistake. Previous mistakes meant thinking someone was his friend when they weren't or being singled out for beatings, wedgies, swirlies and whatever else passed for public ridicule and torment.
In this instance, Sheldon had finally decided that he liked Penny beyond the agreed upon friendship paradigm. That she agreed to accompany him on a 'date' indicated a mutual desire. That or she was just 'being nice'. Curse you, Amy Farrah Fowler and your stupid Schrodinger's Cat analogy! Still, the neurobiologist was right: at least after this date he'd know where he stood with Penny. Whether he'd be interested or capable of altering their paradigm.
Capable of altering himself.
Sheldon took a deep breath and went into the store.
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As Penny finished packing her overnight bag she heard an unfamiliar rhythm at her door.
Ba-dum-dum "Penny."
Ba-dum-dum "Penny."
Ba-dum-dum "Penny."
Then what sounded like a mini drum solo.
"What the hell?" she breathed and took up her bag and purse and went to answer the door.
"What's going-" Penny stopped dead, her eyes widened as she took in Sheldon before her wearing a grey button down shirt that was open to mid chest to reveal a red Flash t-shirt and a pair of blue jeans. Slung across his shoulder was a leather strap that held a set of bongo drums comfortably at his hips.
"Good morning, Penny," Sheldon said cheerily. "Your apparel is appropriate," he said as he noted her flowered sundress and red flats.
"Uh, thanks," she said. "You look, uh, appropriate yourself."
Sheldon visibly relaxed. "Shall we go?"
"Sure." Penny closed her door and locked up.
"Let me grab my overnight bag and we'll be off." He drummed his way into his apartment.
"Crap on a cracker," Penny said under her breath.
XxX
Penny chewed on her bottom lip as she drove, mulling about what to say as Sheldon talked about their trip. He accented his conversation with soft pats on his drum.
"Once we get to the Castle we can have a bite to eat at the Visitors Center before exploring. There's an official tour but I believe I've researched enough to be an adequate guide. For instance, the history of Hearst Castle actually begins in eighteen sixty five when George Hearst purchased forty thousand acres of ranchland. In nineteen nineteen William Randolph Hearst inherited what had grown to more than two hundred and fifty thousa-"
Penny had had enough. "Okay Sheldon, what's going on?"
"What do you mean?" replied a puzzled Sheldon. "We're on our way to Hearst Castle."
"No, I mean what is this?" She gave a swirl of her finger to encompass everything.
"Ah." Sheldon frowned. "Was I not clear?"
"Yeah, yeah, it's a date. Only you don't date."
"Just because I haven't dated doesn't mean I 'don't date'. Your logic is flawed."
"But you're all over the place!" Penny gasped. "I mean I saw you eat Honey Puffs on oatmeal day!"
"'Oatmeal day'. Psh."
Penny glanced worriedly at her friend.
"Is this about the Roommate Agreement?" she asked.
"'Roommate Agreement'. Psh."
"Sheldon, talk to Leonard. I'm sure you can come to a-"
"Penny, are you familiar with entropy?"
"Of course not!"
"Don't kid yourself," Sheldon replied evenly. "It's all around you. When you drop a deck of cards onto the floor they don't arrange themselves by suit or by number. A broken egg won't come back together if you throw it at a wall, just like your apartment continues to get messier because you never clean it up."
"Hey!"
"The second law of thermodynamics. All my life I've had low entropy like an ice cube, ordered and solid. But put that ice cube into a piping hot bowl of random bowel movements and confounding neighbors the molecules inside the ice cube break loose and are able to move as freely as the liquid; their randomness increases and so does their entropy."
Penny was stunned. "What does that even mean?"
"It means I move where the music takes me, Kitten."
Sheldon turned on the radio, gave Penny a smile and then looked out the side window.
XxX
"Oh. My. God," Penny breathed as Sheldon and she neared a giant pool with what looked like a Roman temple across the way. "This is like ancient Greece."
"Actually it's a combination of Greek and Roman," replied Sheldon as his hand absently patted his drum. "The main axis centerpiece and north terminus is the facade of an actual ancient Roman temple that William Randolph Hearst had purchased in Europe and imported to San Simeon."
"Crazy," said Penny as she snapped photos with her camera. She took in the mountain view over the temple front. "Man, I wished I lived here."
"By today's standards the Castle and grounds could be replicated for five hundred million," said Sheldon. "Rather than acting perhaps you'd be better off 'hanging out' at the university's IT department looking for the next Bill Gates."
"No thanks. I've already got a guy in my life I can barely understand," chuckled Penny as she nudged him with her shoulder.
"Yes, but he won't have a net worth sufficient to be labeled 'wealthy' until he claims his Nobel Prize," he said evenly as they walked to the front of the temple.
"Hey, just because I dream about being rich and famous doesn't mean that's all I want," she said defensively. "There's more to life than money."
"Indeed," Sheldon agreed. "Excuse me," he said to an older couple who were taking pictures of the statues by the temple. "I'm hoping you'd assist me by taking a picture of the two of us?"
"Certainly," said the man and Penny handed over her camera.
"I thought Mister Memory didn't need pictures?" she teased as the pair went to stand on the steps by the pillars.
"Doctor, and this is for you." Sheldon's glance lingered at Penny's face. "I don't want you to forget."
Without thinking Penny slipped her arm around him and stood close to her-to Sheldon-and practically grinned her brains out as she felt his hand touch the small of her back.
XxX
"-Aside from politics, William Randolph Hearst was also a significant player in publishing and communications," said Sheldon as Penny took a sip of her wine. "He entered radio broadcasting in the nineteen twenties and television in the nineteen forties."
"Anything with comic books?" asked Penny. "He seems to have his fingers in every other pie."
"Not comic books per se but his Hearst Metrotone News is widely credited with creating the comic strip syndication business. You might have seen King Features Syndicate on your Garfield books or on comic strip pages. That's his company. And speaking of pie." Sheldon removed his napkin from the table as the waitress arrived with his slice of pecan pie.
Penny watched with amusement as he took his fork and proceeded to count the number of pecans on top before tapping each side as if to calculate the angle of the cut.
"So you noticed my Garfield books on the shelf, huh?" she said as he took a bite of his pie.
Sheldon finished chewing before replying, "Read them, actually."
"When? I didn't see you."
"When you were in the washroom or getting changed."
Penny snorted. "Yeah but it's not like it takes me twenty minutes to change a shirt."
The physicist's fork, laden with pie, froze in midair.
"Penny, I read twenty thousand words per minute and have an eidetic memory. What I see I remember and all it takes for me is a glance and the image is fixed. For instance, if I had a pen I could draw out your erroneous soup tattoo." He ate his piece of pie.
"Yeah, let's not," Penny blushed. "So how's the pie?"
"It's good for it being non-Meemaw made."
"My Nanny also made them," Penny said wistfully. "I used to pick all the nuts out of them and eat them first and then eat the rest of the pie."
"Would you like to try a piece?" asked Sheldon.
Penny cocked her head. "You sure?"
There's a pause and then he pushed the plate towards her. Penny took up her fork and broke off a bit near the crust end and took a bite.
"Awesome!" she said as she chewed.
"As I said." Sheldon hesitated a moment before taking another piece of pie. The fork came to his mouth and, again, a slight pause before he took the bite. Immediately he went for his napkin and wiped his lips.
"So I take it your Meemaw baked a lot," said Penny.
"Any Meemaw who doesn't know how to bake isn't worthy of the title," Sheldon sniffed. "You can have more if you like."
"Looks like I'll never be a Meemaw. I'm lucky if I get Pillsbury cookies right," Penny smiled as she took another piece. "But I've smelled a lot of delicious things from your apartment. You'd make an honorary Meemaw."
"Grandsires in the Cooper household are Pop-Pops." Again Sheldon awkwardly took a bite of pie and then wiped his lips.
"And as we know you're the king of traditions," said Penny as she took another piece.
Sheldon's eyes watched Penny's fork as it came closer to his own end. In his estimation there were two inches between them. He could see Penny's fork tine marks on the pie.
"You can have the rest," he said at once and again wiped his lips, not noticing Penny's slight eyebrow raise at the tone.
"I'm good with this bite," she said.
"I'm 'good' too." Sheldon pushed the plate away and stood. "Excuse me, I have to go to the washroom," he said and dashed off.
Penny watched him go before turning to stare thoughtfully at the pie.
XxX
Penny sat on her bed in her pajamas brushing her hair and processing her day with Sheldon. The tour of Hearst Castle was a series of photo ops and lessons on architecture, horticulture and guests of the Hearsts over the years. It was like being with the Sheldon of old.
And yet it wasn't.
This Sheldon wore jeans and went to a strange restaurant and shared a slice of pecan pie although he stopped well short of where Penny's germy fork touched. Still, it meant she touched his food and maybe she should look at all of this as a gigantic breakthrough.
And yet he kept wiping his twitchy lips.
Sheldon was trying, and Penny appreciated the gesture, but if it made him-
Knock Knock Knock "Penny."
Knock Knock Knock "Penny."
Knock Knock Knock "Penny."
"Door's open, Sheldon," she said and he entered wearing his blue plaid pajamas, housecoat, slippers and bongo drums.
Penny smirked. "Kinda late for a serenade don't ya think?"
"A serenade perhaps but not for a walk."
"In pajamas?"
"It's nighttime. Besides, we'll be on the beach where even scantier clothing is the traditional norm," he said. "Plus what's the point of getting you a room with a patio entrance if we don't use it?"
"Sure," Penny said after a moment. She went to the closet and put on a short silky housecoat she had brought with her and the pair went out the patio door into the night.
"Aren't you going to wear some sort of foot apparel?" asked Sheldon.
"It's the beach. No big deal."
"Hepatitis is a big deal." Pause. "Not that we should be talking about that."
Penny gathered her thoughts as they walked.
"I never knew you liked the beach," she said at last.
"I don't," Sheldon countered. "I don't like unfiltered or unchlorinated water or sand in my shoes."
"Isn't that what's happening now?"
"I'm beyond the reach of the tide and I'm wearing slippers not shoes."
Penny's stomach muscles contracted.
"Sheldon, are you sure you're alright? I'm worried," she said.
Sheldon stopped and she turned to see him under the moonlight.
"You're not having a good time?" he asked seriously.
"It's been amazing. I just-you're okay?"
"Am I okay," he snorted. "You make it sound as if I've lost my mind." He looked over her shoulder. "Do you know that the sun is four hundred thousand times brighter than a full moon?"
They continued to walk and Sheldon began rhythmically tapping his drum.
"Proxima Centauri's the nearest star. The celestial bodies that follow are: Alpha Centauri A, Toli,Barnard's Star, Wolf 359, Lalande 21185, Sirius A, Sirius B, BL-Ceti, UV-Ceti, Ross 154, Ross 248, Epsilon Eridani, Lac-9352, Ross 128, EZ Aquarii A, EZ Aquarii B, EZ Aquarii C, Procyon A. Those are the stars that are nearest to me. Tra-la-la and fiddle-dee-dee."
"What about the sun?" asked Penny.
"I thought Sol was obvious," he said, making Penny chuckle.
"What's obvious to you isn't necessary obvious, Dr. C., and most definitely vice versa."
Sheldon paused his drumming. "You're mistaking my disinterest in most things for confusion."
"So you mean you're not interested in me?" He snorted. "Because you sure got the confusing part down pat."
"In what way?" He resumed drumming.
"You said that relationships were yukkie and that sex was repulsive and yet here we are on a date," said Penny. "How logical is that?"
Sheldon sighed. "Penny, unlike you, the rest of the world doesn't just dive into a strange lake." Now it was Penny's turn to snort.
"Let me get this straight, you're calling me strange?"
"I've never encountered anyone like you," he said evenly. "Your hippy-dippy ways and ability to drive marauders away with a baseball bat."
Penny laughed. "They don't sound like things that'd interest you." Sheldon turned his head to regard her. "I mean you're all about science and atoms and stars not actresses from Nebraska."
"They're not as dissimilar as you may think," he replied. "All the atoms that comprise life on Earth, even the atoms that make up the body of a Nebraskan thespian, are traceable to the high mass stars that went unstable and collapsed and then exploded scattering forth carbon, nitrogen, oxygen and all the fundamental ingredients of life itself. When I write my posits on the whiteboard or look up at the night sky I know that she's a part of this universe." Pause. "And she shouldn't downplay herself because the very universe we see up there is in her. In all of us."
"Sheldon, that's beautiful," Penny said softly.
"It's the truth," he said with a shrug.
"It's still nice to hear." They continued to walk. "It's kinda trippy thinking about all this. I'm a piece of forever."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm a part of the universe, remember?"
"Ah. But the universe isn't forever," Sheldon amended.
Penny's smile dropped. "What do you mean?"
"The universe's expansion is increasing and as it does it will eventually cool. Everything that we know, planets and suns and stars, will die out until all that's left are black holes and even they will eventually collapse and die. Then the universe will be a frozen nothingness for eternity."
Penny put out a hand and stopped their walk.
"Wait, you mean everything is gonna die?" she gasped.
"To everything there is a season," he said evenly.
They both turned to stare at the sky in silence.
"I can't believe all this will disappear," she said at last. "I mean I know we'll die but not this. It's too beautiful."
"Life is beautiful, Penny. And we're extremely fortunate that for the one instant in time the universe is alive we exist, a moment of consciousness, where we children of the stars can appreciate the wonders of creation-"
Sheldon unexpectedly felt Penny's hand at the back of his head pulling him down until their lips met. He wasn't sure what to do and so remained still and let his brain absorb the details of her soft lips and the feel of her hand in his hair and the sound of the gentle waves against the shore.
"Fascinating," said Sheldon as they parted and Penny laughed before their lips again came together. This time the physicist moved with her and before he knew it his hand went to her cheek but stopped short of touching.
Penny wanted so much more but reminded herself that this was probably Sheldon's first 'real' kiss so she should keep it simple.
They pulled back, breaths mingled, and their eyes locked and in that moment Penny felt the weight of Dr. Sheldon Cooper taking in everything about her. Rather than shrink away, she let him explore, hoping that she had whatever it was he was looking for.
At last his eyes dropped to her shoulder and he lightly bit his lower lip.
"We should probably get back to the house," Penny said softly.
Sheldon nodded and the pair turned back.
"Shel-don's walk-ing and play-ing the bongos," sang Sheldon as he beat away on the drums.
Penny tried to shush him but was giggling too hard.
"Pen-ny's try-ing to shush up my bongos."
"I'll show you shush," she said and tried for the bongos but Sheldon held them over his head.
"Is that Proxima Centauri?" he gasped as he looked over Penny's shoulder. The Nebraskan turned and at that moment Sheldon took off.
"Pen-ny's cra-zy if she thinks she'll take my bongos!" he said excitedly as he ran.
Penny shook her head in mirth before dashing after him. She quickly narrowed the distance and began herding Sheldon in a roundabout way towards the house.
"Pen-ny"- he huffed and puffed-"will ne-ver"-another huff and puff-"catch Sheldon for his bongos."
"Oh yeah?" Penny said as she ran to his side and put her arms around his waist. Immediately he slowed to a stop and bowed over to catch his breath. Penny walked to his other side. "Penny's fas-ter and owns Sheldon and his bongos." She gave a quick drum on the bongos and Sheldon glanced up at her, mouth open as he sucked in air and yet with an exhilarating joy stamped on his face.
"You think you're amusing," he gasped.
"Yu-P."
Sheldon stood and took a deep breath before the two of them began walking.
"Well?" asked Penny. Sheldon looked at her curiously. "The bongos chum." Sheldon took off the strap and Penny took the bongos and slung them across her body and began lightly drumming.
"So," she said after a moment. "How does your science-y stuff say the date went?"
"I have to go over the data," replied Sheldon before glancing sideways at Penny. "Although the initial results look promising."
"That's good," replied Penny. "So when will you know if you want to do this again?"
"I'm-not sure." Pause. "I don't want to make a mistake."
"Fair enough."
They got to the sliding door and entered Penny's room. Sheldon crossed the room to the inner door.
"Goodnight Penny," he said and departed.
He entered his room and closed the door before taking off and folding his housecoat and placed it over the back of the chair. He then sat on the bed, his mind retracing the day. Penny seemed pleased with how things went. Her eyes dilated at the sight of him in his hot and uncomfortable jeans and she got a kick out of simultaneously contaminating the pecan pie with their saliva-covered forks. Then there were the pictures taken in close proximity with unsanitized arms around waists and-I kissed her-then running across a beach at night where he might have garnered an infection or a cold. His hand went to his lips, his fingers gently touching them.
Without a doubt he knew he was going insane.
He also knew he couldn't stop.
xTBBTx
Entropy talk: understandinguncertaintyorg-another-look-entropy
Sheldon's universe talk: Neil Degrasse Tyson, Carl Sagan and every show about the universe I've ever seen.
Hearst Castle Info: Hearstcastleorg