Stage 5 the upward turn: As you start to adjust to life without your dear one, your life becomes a little calmer and more organized. Your physical symptoms lessen, and your ''depression'' begins to lift slightly.
Clarke had spent her night at her own place she created. She felt like she didn't belong anymore. Lexa was the only one who tried to help Clarke get through everything.
Clarke made a campfire and was about to go to sleep when she heard footsteps coming towards her. Clarke was always causious, so she grabbed the knife Lexa had made for her from scrap and held it close to her. Clarke turned around and was about to stick out the knife until she saw Lexa standing in front of her.
''Oh, sorry'' Clarke said embarrassed.
Lexa smiled at Clarke ''No worries. I shouldn't have come so late in the evening. I was worried so I thought I'd come check on your leg'' Lexa said, trying to find an excuse to come see Clarke.
''Yeah that would be great. I have the feeling that my leg is getting better. Walking goes a little bit easier now. I know it will never heal properly but it's better than nothing'' Clarke said.
Lexa nodded at Clarke ''Don't give up just yet. We can get rescued any second now'' Lexa said with a grin on her face.
Clarke looked up in surprise ''Rescued?'' she asked surprised.
Lexa nodded with a smile ''Yes. We think we found the location of the cockpit. I'm heading there tomorrow with Raven to go look for the blackbox so we can send out a distress signal'' Lexa said proudly.
''Just be careful'' Clarke said worried.
''I promise'' Lexa said with a smile. ''Can I take a look at your leg?'' Lexa asked before pointing at the splint.
Clarke nodded and gestured for Lexa to sit down next to her ''Yes of course you can'' Clarke said. When she was with Lexa she felt happy, even if it was just for a second.
Lexa sat down next to Clarke and focused on Clarkes leg. She stared at Clarke for a second ''Can I lend the knife for a second?'' she asked.
Clarke nodded and handed Lexa the knife.
Lexa cut the bandages so the splint came of. After that she cut the bandages lose around the flesh wound, which was practically healed. ''It looks good'' Lexa said relieved before letting out a big sigh.
This surprised Clarke but she noticed that Lexa looked rather tired ''Are you okay?'' Clarke asked.
Lexa turned around to face the blonde for a second ''Yeah. Just a bit tired'' Lexa admitted.
''Oh okay'' Clarke said with a short smile before her thoughts were somewhere else.
Lexa looked back at the leg. She wanted to clean the wound with some water she brought with her. She grabbed a clean bandage and cleaned the wound. It was becoming a scar for most of it, but some places were still open. The burned skin was still there and it looked awful but Lexa knew that would never recover. She had burns herself as well after the plane crash. After Lexa was done with cleaning the wound she put new bandages around it again.
''I need to replace the branches used in your splint. Luckily I brought 3 new ones with me''.
Lexa put three new branches around Clarkes leg, before finishing the splint again ''All done'' Lexa said with a smile.
She saw that Clarke was distracted so she wanted to leave her alone. Lexa stood up and was about to leave when Clarkes reached for her hand and stopped Lexa in her tracks. ''Wait'' Clarke said softly.
Lexa turned around to look Clarke in the eyes. Lexa saw hope in Clarkes eyes again and this had been the first time since the death of her sister.
''Are you hungry?'' Clarke asked, trying to stay cool.
Lexa nodded ''Yeah. I haven't eaten'' Lexa admitted.
''Than sit down. I caught some fish earlier this evening'' Clarke said with a smile.
Lexa sat down next to Clarke again. Clarke handed her a piece of fish and they ate in silence.
Until Lexa was done with her food and looked at Clarke ''You never told me what it is that you did for a living'' Lexa said, hoping she didn't go to far. Knowing Clarke had a difficult time.
Clarke turned around and looked at Lexa ''Yea, I guess so. I was an artist'' Clarke said proudly.
''Wow, that's amazing!'' Lexa said enthousiastic.
''Thank you'' Clarke said blushing. ''You know my mother wanted me to go to Medical School, but it wasn't what I wanted so I went to Art School instead. My mother blamed me for that for a long time. It wasn't until a few months ago things between me and her started to change. When my dad left, my mother changed. She became this person who stopped living. And somehow, she was reminded of him everyday because of me. Gilly didn't have the same father as me. We were half-sisters. My mother had this affair with some random high school teacher, Marcus Kane. My father found out and that was when he left. So my mother hated me for looking like him'' Clarke said honestly.
''That must've been so hard for you. Did you still see your father after he left?'' Lexa asked.
''Honestly, no. I left everything behind and moved to another town to get away from everything. But after a while I realised that I left my sister behind too, so I moved back. And I tried to be the sister I could be''.
''You were a great sister Clarke'' Lexa said trying to convince Clarke. ''I saw the way she looked at you. She loved you with all of her heart, Clarke. Don't hesitate about that for a second'' Lexa said.
''I'm still doubting that'' Clarke said, holding back her tears. ''I made so many mistakes, you know'' she admitted.
''Clarke. You are not the only one'' Lexa said with honestly. ''Everybody makes mistakes. We have to forgive ourself, in order to move on. One day you will see that too. I've been where you are. I lost the girl and my best friend in Afghanistan. But after a long time I was finally ready to face the fact that I wasn't the reason they died. Same for you. It's not your fault, okay?'' Lexa said, before pulling Clarke in for a hug.
Clarke held herself together but embraced the hug anyway. ''Thank you'' she whispered into Lexas ear.
''Always'' Lexa said with a smile before pulling away from the hug because she didn't want to cross the line.
Clarke stared Lexa right in the eyes and without thinking she leaned in and kissed Lexa. Lexa was caught of guard by Clarke, but kissed back rightaway. Both of them got lost in the kiss for a second, feeling like it was just them. No plane crash, no death, no pain, just feelings.
Clarke pulled away after a few seconds ''I'm sorry'' she whispered, still leaning against Lexas forhead, noses touching. ''Don't be'' Lexa whispered before leaning in to kiss Clarke again.
Clarke and Lexa woke up the next day still in an embrace from the night before. Lexa looked to see Clarke lying next to her, looking peacefully at Lexa. ''Goodmorning'' Lexa whispered softly before placing a kiss on Clarkes cheek.
Clarke smiled at Lexa ''Goodmorning soldier'' she said with a grin on her face, before kissing Lexa for a second.
Lexa sat straight up and looked around, their clothes were shattered all around the place. Lying in the dirt. ''Well we will need to wash our clothes'' she said with a loud laugh.
''Totally worth it'' Clarke said before pulling Lexa towards her, and kissed her.
''Yeah'' Lexa said with a grin before kissing Clarke back quickly, before sitting up again.
''I need to go to the cockpit from the plane'' Lexa said with a serious tone, before standing up to gather clothes.
Clarke looked up and studied the features from the brunette, who was getting dressed. She noticed Lexas leg which was filled with scars and burns. She limped all the time with leg but somehow managed to get around pretty easy.
When Lexa was dressed she gathered Clarkes clothes as well and handed them over to her.
Clarke had a difficult time to get dressed with the splint around her leg so Lexa helped her. This made them both laugh. It wasn't awkward at all anymore between them.
''Thank you'' Clarke said with a grin.
''You're welcome'' Lexa said with a smile before handing Clarke over something to drink after she was dressed as well.
Lexa sat down and prepared some food before she would leave to head towards higher point on the Island. They had never gone so far before, well atleast Clarke hadn't.
Clark sat down next to Lexa. Lexa handed her over some food and she accepted it with a smile before chewing it like it was her last meal ever. This made Lexa smile for a second. Clarke noticed this and grinned at Lexa.
''Lexa, can I ask you something?'' Clarke asked.
''Of course you can'' Lexa said with a smile.
''Your leg..'' Clarke said a bit careful.
''It's okay'' Lexa said reassuring.
''What's wrong with your leg exactly?'' Clarke asked.
''I told you about the incident in Afghanistan with the grenate right? Well, I broke my upper leg and Lincoln, my best friend put a splint around it. But I had to walk back to camp before it could be examined. Later they found out that some splinters of the grenate were in my leg near my nerves. So I needed to be operated, and my leg was infected badly. They wanted to amputate my leg, but I refused and I wanted them to save my leg. But they had to cut away a large chunk of skin, muscles and nerves. So I would always be in pain after that. It was my chose, and honestly I did regret it in the past but I can get around well nowadays. I'm used to the pain'' Lexa said, explaining what choses she made in the past.
''I understand. If I had to make the same decision I guess I would've kept my leg as well'' Clarke said honestly.
Lexa smiled at her ''Yeah. Anyway, I have to go before it get's to late'' She said with a hurry.
''Alright'' Clarke said a bit distracted.
Lexa stood up and walked towards Clarke and leaned in for a quick kiss before turning around to leave. But Clarke stood up and called after her ''Can I come with you?'' Clarke asked.
Lexa turned around and nodded at Clarke ''Of course. Are you sure though?'' Lexa asked surprised.
''I am sure'' Clarke said before standing up. ''Let's go'' She said with a smile.