Chapter Forty-Three: Reasoning of a Lover
Zack entered Sephiroth's office without so much as a knock, but the visit had not come as a surprise on any level. While normally a huge grin would be spread across Zack's lips from the thrill of intruding on the general, he now frowned deeply, an expression all but foreign to him. He stood in the door, arms folded across his chest, staring at Sephiroth.
The general didn't even look up. "Good morning, Zack," he said in a cold, business-like tone.
Zack didn't reply. Normally, Sephiroth couldn't keep his comrade's mouth shut, and now he found himself wishing that he would speak. Finally, by tilting his head up, he met Zack's gaze, his posture not relaxing and his cold, emotionless mask not dissolving.
"If you didn't return her feelings," Zack began slowly, through grit teeth, "you could have let her know in a better way."
Sephiroth suddenly felt cold, like he had been doused with water from a river in the winter. He did not let the feeling transfer to his expression. "Is she all right?" he asked blandly.
"No she's not all right!" Zack exploded, his tone very near a yell. "She won't eat or sleep because of you!"
Sephiroth found himself incapable of a reply.
"Why did you do this?" Zack demanded.
Once again, the power of speech seemed to elude the general.
"There must be a really good reason she's down there in agony!" Zack retorted, his words coming like slaps. "What is it?"
"I didn't mean for her to be hurt," Sephiroth finally managed after seconds of ringing silence. "Not like that."
"So you meant to cause her at least a little pain?"
"No! But I knew I had to! I couldn't…" His eyes closed, masking the hurt that was plainly evident within them. His face became smooth, and Zack watched as Sephiroth bottled all his emotion, leaving behind an empty, unfeeling shell.
"Please give her my condolences." Sephiroth sat down, clearly signaling that Zack was dismissed and that failure to leave quickly would be a dangerous move.
Zack didn't take the hint, and instead, rubbed his forehead as if exhausted. "Look, sorry about being so…I just visited Aralyn. She needed a friend. It was a long time before I could get a word out of her, and then do you know what she said? She said that she was sorry for hurting you. She said that if this is what will make you happy, then she will step out of your life without another word."
Sephiroth lowered his head. His face was set in a scowl, though his hands shook.
"Is that what you intended?"
Coldly, fluidly, Sephiroth slowly nodded once.
"Why? Why do that to her…and to yourself! You can't tell me you're not head over heels for the girl; I see it in your eyes. You'd die for her without a second's hesitation, I know it!"
Sephiroth hesitated. "She returns my feelings," he admitted quietly. "And therein lies the problem."
Zack stared blankly at his commander. "So you don't want her hurt, is that what you're trying to say?"
"…Yes. That must be it."
"Well, she's in a lot of pain now, and I'm sure a visit would alleviate it. Does that change anything?"
There was a long pause. "No. She's strong; she'll pull through this."
Zack waited more, but when nothing came, he threw up his hands in defeat. "I won't ask for your reasoning. I'm sure it's so twisted I couldn't make sense of it if I tried, and I know that I can't convince you against what you're set on. Let me tell you this, then. She needs you like she needs to breathe. You need the same. Both of you will suffocate if you remain adamant with this."
He threw up his hands. "But you are the mighty Sephiroth, so I guess you know what's best."
Zack didn't give Sephiroth a chance to reply. He exited the room slowly, pulling the door closed behind him.