!*!*! ATTENTION... ARRETA... УВАГА !*!*!
Disclaimer: Is the relationship between the three main characters dysfunctional? Yes, it is. That's how you know I didn't write it. Wait, that's not right... It would be more dysfunctional if I wrote it. Read on.
Shikamaru shrugged into a jacket, patting the pockets to make sure that all of his exploding tags, kunai, and shuriken were in their places.
Everything that had happened between Shikamaru, Naruto, and Katsutoshi had supposed to be secret, kept from the population so as not to alarm them. So, naturally, everyone in the village knew what had occurred. Shikamaru wasn't even sure how everyone had found out, but they had, and now he and Naruto were known as shinobi and were the "heroes" of the village. Not only that, but two dozen people had tried to sneak into the jail and attempt to kill Katsutoshi, furious that he had plotted against Kotone and Takeshi.
But now, even though he and Naruto had been invited to stay in the village for as long as they liked, it was time to return to Konoha.
He took one last glance around the room that he had been staying in, and then turned and walked out of the room, going over to Naruto's.
He cleared his throat, "Naruto, you in there?"
As much as he would have liked to simply walk in without announcing himself, hopefully while Naruto was changing, he wasn't going to. He didn't want to be a Kakashi or a Kazuo. Perverts.
"Yeah, come on in!" Naruto replied.
Shikamaru paused and frowned. What was wrong with her voice? It sounded distinctly off. He slid opened the door, and came face to face with Naruto, but it was a very male Naruto. He blinked. What the…
Naruto was standing in front of him, wearing a pair of standard shinobi pants and a short-sleeved dark orange shirt. She, no he… Was she a she or a he at this point? She smiled at him, and Shikamaru almost felt like bashing his head on the wall. What had happened to his Naruto? Naruto was so much nicer to look like when she was a girl.
"Naruto… Why are you dressed like that?" he asked slowly, hoping that this was just a nightmare. He considered pinching himself momentarily, but then dismissed the idea as troublesome.
"Huh? Oh, well… Now that the mission is over, I don't need to be a girl anymore."
There were so many things wrong with that simple sentence.
"But you are a girl," Shikamaru pointed out.
She, or was it he? Frowned at him and said in a low voice, "I know, but… Listen, back in Konoha, I'm a guy, right? Everyone knows me as a guy. Here, almost everyone thinks I'm a girl. I know it might seem paranoid, but I don't want the people here to think of me as a girl. I want them to think I'm a guy. Just so that if any of them come to Konoha, they refer to me as a guy." She sighed and rubbed her hand over her face. "Does that make any sense? I don't want any attention being drawn to my gender back there."
Shikamaru just stared. She was freaking out slightly. He could see her point, even if it was ever so slight. She was completely over reacting, and he wasn't just thinking that because he preferred to see her in her actual female form. "You do know that you're going to have to tell people eventually, right?"
She nodded. "Yes… Eventually." Naruto's face had that stubborn look that it got when the topic had to do with training, and he knew better than to argue.
"Fine… The guys are going to be disappointed, though," he muttered.
Naruto looked at him curiously. "What do you mean?"
He shook his head. "Nothing." Yep. The guys, and most likely some of the girls, were going to have a fit about this. Not that Naruto wasn't cute as a guy, but it just wasn't the same. He sighed. "Come on, we've got to meet Takeshi in his office. He has a message for us to take to Lady Tsunade," he said, turning and walking away.
"Okay!" Naruto bounded after him.
As they made their way down the streets, people were staring at them, open mouthed and gaping. Not at him, but at Naruto. It was easy to see the resemblance between girl-Naruto and guy-Naruto, so the people were probably wondering whether Naruto had a brother, if they were hallucinating, or… whether Naruto was actually a guy.
As they passed, Shikamaru swore he saw one of the guys faint. Naruto, of course, seemed completely oblivious to everything going on.
Finally, and after a whole bunch more stares, they made it to Takeshi's office. They pushed opened the doors to Takeshi's office, and then stood before him, waiting.
Takeshi waved one hand vaguely, not glancing up from the paper he was scribbling rapidly on. "Sit down you two. I'll have this done in just a moment."
They nodded and waited.
Then, with a flourish on the paper, he signed his name and looked up. His eyes widened, and his pen skidded across the paper, leaving an unsightly blot. "Naruto?"
Wow, what a reaction.
Naruto nodded and gave a slightly wave. "Hey, Takeshi."
"You…"
"You forgot that I'm a guy, didn't you?"
"…"
The silence answered that question. After another moment, Takeshi seemed to realize that he was staring at Naruto, and quickly cleared his throat. "No, I didn't forget."
Lies. Shikamaru snorted.
"I was just surprised. I'm just so used to seeing your other form. That's all. So, this is how you really look?" Naruto nodded, and Takeshi muttered something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like, "What a waste."
Then, there was a crash behind them.
Shikamaru whirled around, only to see Kotone standing stock still in the doorway, a shattered pottery mug on the ground in front of her, staring at Naruto. Apparently, Naruto's new look was causing some troublesome reactions. First Takeshi, and now Kotone.
Naruto jumped over the sofa and rushed to Kotone. "Are you alright? What's wrong?"
She blinked. "Naruto?"
"Yeah?"
"Oh… So it is you."
"Yep."
"You're very… guyish."
Naruto looked at her oddly. "That might be because I'm a guy."
"Right." She seemed to be going into some mild form of shock.
Naruto guided Kotone down into a chair and shot Shikamaru a questioning look. "What's wrong with them?" she asked over the link of their earrings.
She seriously had no idea? "They're just surprised by your new look." That's an understatement.
Takeshi finally stopped staring at Naruto and turned to Shikamaru, rolling up the scroll he had been writing as he did so. "This is for Lady Tsunade. For her eyes only."
Shikamaru nodded and took the scroll. He knew better than to show the scroll to anyone else.
Takeshi leaned back in his chair. "Now… I know that you two have to leave, but there's something I want to say to you two before you go. I am in your debt. No, don't interrupt. I know that you were sent here by your hokage to protect Kotone and find who was trying to harm her, but I am still in your debt. She is everything to me, and you saved her. You will always be welcome here. Anytime you're in trouble, you send a message to me, or come here, and I will try to help you. Now, is there anything you two want? Anything at all before you leave?"
Shikamaru shook his head. "Nothing I can think of. I appreciate the offer, though. Thank you, Takeshi."
To his surprise, Naruto didn't decline the offer. "Actually, there is something that I want," Naruto said.
Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. What one earth could she want? He sincerely hoped that it wasn't a life-time supply of ramen. He really didn't want to help haul it back to Konoha.
"I want Hikari, Keita, and Shota." Naruto's voice almost seemed to echo around the room.
Takeshi shook his head. "What was that again?"
"I want Keita, Hikari, and Shota turned over to my care," Naruto repeated evenly. "I promised them that they wouldn't be hurt. You're going to either kill them or keep them in prison, right? Because, even if they weren't the ones behind the plot to kill Kotone, they were still the ones who were hired to do it. I swore on my honor as a shinobi that I would see that they weren't harmed." Naruto paused, letting this sink in, and then continued. "Besides that… There's also the fact that we, Shikamaru and I, are here on a mission given to us by lady Tsunade, our hokage, the hokage of Konoha, and we captured them, which means that technically they're our bounty."
Now Takeshi wasn't the only one staring at Naruto.
Shikamaru replayed what she had said in his head. Besides the fact that it was stupidly honorable to try and save the assassins… Naruto was actually making sense, and she was using politics and logic to try and argue her point. Who was this and where had Naruto gone? She really did know a lot more than she let on. But, even if she made a good point, it would still put Takeshi in an awkward position. Letting the people who had tried to kill his daughter go? People probably wouldn't approve of that.
"Naruto. I don't-" Takeshi started to say, but Kotone cut him off. "Yes. Naruto, you can take them with you."
Did Kotone just overrule Takeshi? Yes, yes she did.
Takeshi turned to his daughter in bewilderment. "Kotone?"
"I want Naruto to take them. I don't think they're bad people. They've just done what they had to so that they could survive. Hikari already apologized to me, and I've forgiven her," Kotone said, face serene. "If they stay here, they will be imprisoned at the very least, but if they go… Naruto, what are you planning to do to them?"
"I want to try and see if I can make them Shinobi of Konoha. I want to see if I can give them a… a home."
Shikamaru groaned quietly and grabbed a cigarette from his pouch. All of the feelings in the room were smothering him. It was a girl thing, wasn't it? Kotone had forgiven them, despite everything, and Naruto wanted to… bring them into Konoha and make them respectable. Well, as respectable as ninjas were. And he had the oddest feeling that she'd succeed.
He shook his head mentally. What was he thinking? This was Naruto! Of course she'd succeed. Besides, if the family really did have that bloodline, Hyoton, then the council wouldn't care if they were psychotic mass-murders with a taste for human flesh as long as they pledged themselves to Konoha and continued their line there.
Both Naruto and Kotone were staring at Takeshi, waiting for his decision.
The older man gave a small laugh. "Well, I see that I'm outnumbered. Naruto, you may take them with you. They are now your responsibility."
Naruto bowed. "Thank you, Takeshi-san."
He waved the formalities away. "There's no need for that. Kotone, will you go ask someone to bring the pris- I mean, Hikari, Keita, and Shota here?"
She nodded, smiling slightly, and slipped out of the room.
The next thing Shikamaru knew, his cigarette was plucked from between his lips and he was looking into the face of a pissed Naruto. "Shika! What did I tell you? No smoking! It's bad for you. It'll ruin your lungs and kill your taste buds." And with that, his precious cigarette was incinerated in a spout of flame in Naruto's hand.
He groaned. Why couldn't she just let him smoke a little? But, no, she kept destroying them. And they were expensive on top of that.
It didn't help the situation that Takeshi was making a sound that was suspiciously close to a giggle.
Shikamaru glared at him and Takeshi's face morphed into an innocent expression. Wearily, Shikamaru shook his head. What was wrong with all of the people he knew? Or maybe he was just too normal. And that was saying something, considering that he was a genius, which wasn't exactly normal.
The doors to the office opened once more, and Kotone stepped through, followed by Keita, Hikari, Shota, and then Hisako.
There were various reactions when they all saw Naruto, but none of them were entirely flattering.
Hisako merely blinked, astonished, and then shrugged as if thinking about it would lead to a headache that he didn't particularly want.
Hikari gasped, her eyes widening an alarming extent. "N-Naruto… is that you?" The tone of her voice implied, "Please tell me it's not."
Naruto sighed, clearly getting tired of the response. "Yes, it's me."
Hikari clasped her hands together. "W-why are you using a henge?"
"I'm not. Before I was using a henge. This is how I really look."
Hikari shook her head stubbornly. "No! That can't be right. It doesn't suit you!"
Shota and Keita merely exchanged glances and then shook their heads. "What a shame."
Since Hikari seemed to be in denial about Naruto's gender, Keita turned to Takeshi, swallowing nervously. "May I ask why you want to see us? Your daughter didn't tell us."
Takeshi nodded. "Yes… Well, Naruto had a request of me, and I've granted it. You are going to leave the Yugakure today, under the eye of Naruto. She, sorry, he is going to be responsible for you."
The three siblings frowned in confusion and eyed Naruto warily. "Why?"
"Because, I'm going to try to get you three accepted into Konoha, as Shinobi. I want you three to be somewhere where you'll be accepted and happy."
Their eyes widened, and then the next thing Shikamaru knew, Naruto was at the bottom of a four-person hug.
"Thank you!" Hikari sniffed, eyes shining with tears.
To the obvious disdain of his little brother, Keita was crying. "You are such a good person, Naruto, even if you aren't a hot chick anymore," he blubbered. He turned around and rubbed his sleeve over his eyes. "I'm not crying. I just have something in my eyes."
Shikamaru rolled his eyes. That was possibly the worst excuse ever made for covering up tears.
Shota rolled his eyes at his sibling's reactions and said simply, "Thanks."
"You're welcome," Naruto said with a warm, wide smile.
Keita and Hikari were hugging Naruto again, and Shikamaru forced down a wave of jealously. Seriously, what was wrong with him? They were just being grateful. There was nothing sexual or lecherous about it at all. He cleared his throat. "I hate to break this up, but we have a long trip back to Konoha, and I'd like to get back before the sun goes down. It would be troublesome to travel in the dark."
Takeshi and Kotone stood up. "We'll walk you to the gate."
He nodded and turned to the three siblings. "Just for future reference, if you guys try to run, I will seriously maim you. Clear?"
They nodded hurriedly.
The group make their way out of the building and down the streets in silence. People were still staring at the group, even more now, but they didn't approach.
They had almost made it to the gate of the village before more people appeared. Nagisa and Yukio. They came running up and barreled into Naruto, knocking her to the ground.
"You were going to leave without saying goodb-" Nagisa started to yell, and then froze mid-rant when she saw that she was lying on top of a very male Naruto. "You… What? Huh?" she managed unintelligibly.
Yukio had scrambled to his feet and was staring at Naruto blankly.
Nagisa cleared her throat and tried again, but all that came out was a squeak. "Naruto?"
Naruto grinned nervously. "Yeah. And before you ask, this really is me. I was wearing a henge before. Umm… Could you get off of me?"
Nagisa blushed furiously and jumped up off of Naruto. Then, her eyes widened. "Wait, does this mean that what you told me about…" She lowered her voice but Shikamaru still caught the words, "About my chest filling out… That was a lie?"
Shikamaru just refrained from rolling his eyes. Really? She found out that Naruto was a guy and that's the first thing that her mind jumped to? He would never understand girls, and he didn't want to, either. It would be far too troublesome.
Naruto shook her head. "No! I mean, I didn't lie. It's true, it just didn't happen to me. It happened to a really, really good friend of mine," she said, ruffling Nagisa's hair.
Nagisa seemed to accept that, and looked down shyly, her face growing even pinker from Naruto's affectionate gesture.
Oh no… That's just what he did not need. He did not need Nagisa forming a crush on male Naruto. What the heck was it? Maybe the Kyuubi gave out some sort of pheromone that attracted people? No, it was just Naruto. There was just something… special about her. Shikamaru switched his gaze to Yukio, who hadn't moved yet.
He seemed to be staring at Naruto in a sort of mute horror.
Naruto waved a hand in front of his face worriedly. "Yukio?"
"You… You're a guy?" the boy finally managed to stutter out.
"Yes…"
"Nooo! This can't be happening!" Yukio grabbed Shikamaru's shirt and shook it. "Please, tell me this isn't happening. Tell me it's some sort of horrible nightmare. I'm asleep right now, aren't I?"
He sounded so hopeful. It would be so cruel to burst his bubble… "Nope, you're not dreaming at all."
The boy slid to the ground, and wailed, "Nooo!"
Wow… Shikamaru hid a grin. There must be something really wrong with him for enjoying this.
Then, another person joined their extremely weird farewell party. With a puff of warm mist, Kazuo appeared. "I'm here to say goodbye to the beautiful Naru-chan! How would you like to leave your boy-friend and stay here with me?" he said, practically singing the words. He saw Naruto. And then he fainted on the spot.
Yukio crawled over to his mentor in the more perverted arts and collapsed on top of him. "His heart just wouldn't take the betrayal! Why, Naruto? Why?"
Shikamaru's eye twitched. What the heck was wrong with these people? It's like they were trying to set a new level of abnormalness never reached before. This made bowl cuts and green spandex look normal, which was saying something.
Naruto huffed. "What is wrong with them?"
Kotone answered that one. "Too many things to count, but right now? I'd say they preferred you as a girl."
"I still refuse to accept that you're a boy!" Hikari added in stubbornly.
Naruto groaned and turned to Nagisa. "You think I'm fine as a guy, right?"
She nodded, blush turning an alarming shade of red. "Uh huh. You certainly are fine."
Shikamaru's jaw dropped. Please say that he hadn't heard that he thought he just heard. Nagisa just hit on Naruto! And Naruto was completely oblivious to it. Was nothing sacred anymore?
On the ground, Kazuo began to stir. He raised a hand to his head. "Jeez… What a bad dream." His eyes flickered open, and he sat up. "I dreamed that Naru-chan was really a…" He caught sight of Naruto again and then quickly turned to Yukio. "Tell me I'm hallucinating."
Yukio gave a sad shake of his head. "You're not."
Kazuo looked back at Naruto to quickly that he might have gotten whiplash, running his eyes over her male form. Then, after a few moments, he clasped his head in his hands and began to mutter. "Why? What have I done to deserve this? The epitome of female hotness wasn't real… Those perfect breasts." He went on in that vein for quite a while.
It took most of Shikamaru's willpower to keep from braining the perverted ninja.
Naruto sweat-dropped. "Kazuo… Come on, man. Don't be sad. There are still plenty of beautiful women out there. Are you crying? No! Stop that. Look, I'm still going to take your manuscript to Jiraiya, and I'll make sure that he reads the manuscript you gave me, okay?"
Kazuo nodded eyes brightening slightly, but he still seemed depressed.
Naruto cleared her throat. "I think we should go."
Isn't that what he'd been saying for the past half an hour?
Naruto gave quick hugs to Kotone, Takeshi, Nagisa, and Hisako. Yukio and Kazuo refused hugs, claiming that they could still cling to the hope that they were hallucinating.
Kotone even surprised Shikamaru by giving him a warm hug, and Hisako and Takeshi shook his hand.
"If you guys ever need help, just send a message to Baa-chan, I mean, Lady Tsunade. Okay?"
Kotone nodded, eyes suspiciously shiny.
And then Naruto, Shikamaru, and their charges turned and walked towards the open gate.
A sudden thought struck him. There was the seal in front of the entrance to the village. Wouldn't it undo Naruto's Henge? He asked the question over their link, but the answer came back negative.
"No, I'll be fine. I had a talk with Yukio, and found out that it all depends on the way that you move over the seal. I should be fine," she answered.
They stepped over the threshold of the village… and nothing happened. Naruto was still a guy.
The energetic blonde shinobi waved at the group of people watching them, and shouted. "Bye! Come see me in Konoha sometime!"
Shikamaru gave them a small lazy wave of his own, and then they were off, traveling towards Konoha. Hikari, Keita, and Shota running in between them.
Shikamaru kept an eye on them. If everything went okay, they should arrive in Konoha before the sun went down, or the morning after. After all, it had only taken days before because they were traveling at a civilian's pace, but even Shota was far faster.
Shikamaru sighed, feeling an odd mixture of relief and anxiety. The mission was officially over, but what would happen now? He let out a lazy sigh. Really, he had the feeling that what ever was going to happen, it would be troublesome.
I'm back! I want to formally apologize for the huge gap between chapters, and I would also like to... place all of the blame on someone else. I was kidnapped by aliens. Now, replace "kidnapped" with "forcibly encouraged" and "aliens" with "parents" and you'll have what really happened. But, I am back, and I hope you all enjoy the chapter.
Ja ne,
Rumer Hasit
Cenright: Hum. Well, it's sort of going to be a one mission and then a whole bunch of high-jinks back in Konoha story. I suppose... Or something like that. All I know is that there's going to be more chapters. After all, I can't end it before Naruto gets exposed and Shikamaru gets the girl, right?
Immortal Sailor Cosmos: Yes, poor, Shikamaru. He gets so close to Naruto, but it seems like the universe is conspiring against him. But, don't worry, I'll give him more chances to win Naruto over.
childofflameandwave: Thank you very much. I've given up on trying to make this an action story and have come to the conclusion that I'm just good at writing fluff and light comedy, but if you like it, that's all that matters.
NARU Chan Fangirl: Ah, I'm sorry. Takeshi and Kotone didn't find out about Naruto's secret. They will, though. I promise. And... I didn't exactly update quickly, either. Sorry about that, too. But, thank you for the happy holiday wishes. I appreciate it. I hope your holidays were good as well.
sky040: You like my story? No, you said you love my story. Thank you. Thank you very much. And thank you for reviewing as well. It's always nice to know that people like it.
Dezzal: Thank you. I'm glad you liked that last chapter. I hope you enjoyed this one as well.
faber277: Aw, well, thank you very much. I will definitely keep writing, and I hope you keep reading the story, too.
Shinigami's-Neko-Gami: Yep, Katsutoshi was kind of a bastard, and Naruto was fully justified in beating him down. Shikamaru does need some help with Naruto, doesn't he? I think I might cut him a little slack in future chapters.
xbamsod: Yes, I promise there will be more fluff once they get back to Konoha. I'm a guy! I shouldn't be good at writing fluff, romance, and light comedy, but I am. But it's all good as long as you like it.
Solidus: *take a bow* Well, thank you very much. Glad you enjoyed the story so far.
Berri Sprinkles: I think I'm blushing from all of the praise in your review. I guess all I can say is that I'm happy that you like the story, and that I'm very glad that you told me. I hope you keep reading.
Huoyingmi: Thank you, thank you, and thank you. When I write all I really want to do is entertain and make people laugh, and apparently I've succeeded. And I'm glad you think that everything hangs together pretty well logic-wise. I do try.
animeboylover: Ah! I do apologize for not updating sooner, but unavoidable things sort of got in my way. But, I do hope you're still reading and that you liked this chapter.
harlequin320: Yeah, I wanted to try and wrap up whole murder-plot thing, but I didn't want it to get too serious. I don't think I'm as good at writing that sort of thing. But, really, thanks for reviewing.
Fire Dolphin: Yes, Shikamaru does indeed need to get a move on and try to kiss Naruto or something. Hopefully, the universe won't get in the way again and he can make some progress.
Mystia Katsuragi: I loved your review for chapter four. Glad to know that it made you laugh. And you're caught up. I wasn't really sure if it was okay, my OCs, I mean, but people seem to like them (except Kazuo) so, good. And about the whole Hisako/Hisoka... I think I've used it both ways throughout the story. Once again, I'm sorry it took so long to update.
hana-chan: Yeah, Shikamaru's a nice guy, isn't he? Being worried about Naruto and wanting to get closer to her despite all of her... quirks.
MoonPrincess623: I think you might be right about the sort of relationship between Sasuke and Naruto, but if he is like a older brother... He's going to be an extremely protective older brother. I love the Shika/Naru pairings, too.
Anie6142: Well, just as you wish. I hope you liked the chapter.
Ice Cold Steel: Um. No, no one has died, or in debt or anything like that. It's just family issues... A lot of family issues. Almost entirely family issues, actually. Not the good kind. And just dealing with the future and stuff... and actually someone's illness, too. But... Things have been a little better lately. Thanks for asking, though. Now, onto the chapter. Jeez... I had a lot of grammar issues in the last chapter, huh? I'll have to fix those. And as for Shota. It's just that he's basically grown up on the run, and can't remember anything else, really. So, he's a little odd. Does that explain anything at all? Maybe? Maybe not? And, yes, Hikari is a lesbian. But, um, thanks for reviewing. I always like reading what you think, good and bad.
ZAFO: Wow. That is an absolutely brilliant review. Thank you so much. The best femNaru story... What an honor. And it's even better that you like my OCs. I hope you liked this chapter and thanks for reviewing.
Sillvog: Nope. I swear, this isn't the end. I mean, it is the end of the mission, but it's not the end of the story. There's more to come.
VampiricBloOdyRose: Ah! I've converted you into someone who likes femNaru stories, or is it just mine? Either way, I'm glad that you like it. Thanks for reveiwing.
Vivid x Dreams: I think I rather like Shika jealous like this. It makes him a little more human, and it's fun to write. But, really, people seem to realy dislike Kazuo. Poor guy, hated because he's a pervert... Well... Okay, he might deserve some of it. Nice to know you like my story, and I'm glad to see that you're rooting for Shikamaru and Naruto to get together.