Timeline for Too Many Dates thus far:
Sunday Harry gets dates
Monday Padma
Tuesday Susan
Wednesday Hannah
Thursday Angelina
Friday Fleur
Saturday Luna
Sunday Daphne
Monday Fleur's Party
Tuesday Gabrielle
Wednesday Dungeons and Dragons
Thursday Cho
Friday Lavender
Saturday TBA
Sunday Yule Ball
Author's Note: Some reviewers have commented on the pacing of the story. So that all of you are aware, after the Yule Ball, things will start to speed up as far as time goes instead of every single day being covered. Otherwise I would be 200k words in by New Years.
Chapter 15
Hermione was currently still on her date with George, pretending to be listening to something that George was saying but really thinking about something or rather someone else.
Here she was, just now finishing admittedly a rather fun date with a boy who was clearly interested in her and all she could do was pine for her best friend.
It sounded like some trashy romance novel that she would somewhat guiltily read about an ordinary girl just hoping against hope that her best friend would finally notice her, while he was a rich, smart, funny guy that all the other girls were after.
According to a romance novel, he would still end up falling for her and her alone, and they would end up getting married and live happily ever after.
Reality, as it often was, seemed to be much less kind.
Harry was clearly enjoying spending time with other girls and they with them, proving what she had long known that he was really a great guy.
They weren't bad girls, in fact at least the ones he seemed to be getting closer to such as Padma, Daphne, or Luna were actually rather nice so she couldn't really be mad at them or him.
It also wasn't fair to make him have her as his only friend.
Yet still, no matter what she did, she could not stop fantasizing about him. Fantasizing about him confessing he loved her, about running her hands through his hair and making out with him, or somehow accidently walking in on him in the shower and…"
"Is my explanation about the making of Puking Pastilles really that much of a turn on for you?" George queried, breaking her out of her thoughts.
With a start, she just now realized that she had not been listening at all to what he was saying for the past few minutes.
"No, of course not," She tried to deny.
"You have your hand down your pants," He pointed out.
As she glanced down she realized that she did, having subconsciously done so while thinking about Harry.
Okay, now this was an awkward situation, she thought. He was obviously going to just think she was horny, even if she really was.
Still she had a reputation of maturity to maintain.
"Um, sorry," She tried to say.
"It's totally all right," George said, if anything seeming quite amused, "it happens to the best of us, in fact one time I…"
He stopped before he said anything more and then corrected himself, "actually I kind of like knowing that you're human, it makes you appear as less of a prude."
"I seem like a prude?" Hermione questioned.
"Well yeah, you seem to generally be kind of a stick in the mud and I was actually wondering when we started this date if maybe you had a fun side to you," George answered.
"I can be fun," She tried to insist even though they both knew that wasn't true.
That was actually her biggest problem. She knew she was a great girl, and not unattractive either, but the fact of the matter is being fun or funny simply wasn't her strong suit, and that she had to admit was the thing that Harry liked most in a girl.
Until she managed to change that, there was just no way she could ever realistically hope to really claim Harry's heart.
"Look," George said, deciding to spare her, "it's pretty obvious you're just not into me, and clearly too much into Harry."
She considered denying it but finally decided that there was just no point.
"I guess it is kind of obvious," She was forced to agree.
"I don't understand why you don't just go find a broom closet and go snog him," George suggested.
"I don't think I'm his type," Hermione replied.
"Ridiculous, you're his best friend, smart, and hot, what's not to like?" He pointed out.
"Harry likes fun and funny girls," Hermione replied.
"Ah, so suddenly having a sense of humor isn't a bad thing?" George said, having the nerve to tease her for her constant berating of him and his brother for his pranks.
Getting someone to sit on a whoopee cushion was just immature and not funny!
"In the right taste," She was forced to agree.
George seemed to think for a moment and then asked, "well as an expert on what it takes to be fun and funny, I might be willing to offer my services to help you."
"You want to help me be funny?" She asked.
"Sure," He answered, "I think it will be quite the challenge and entertaining turning you into a comedian. Of course, it also won't be free."
She sighed and said, "What do you want? My soul?"
Hermione had said that last part to be funny, but evidently it wasn't.
"First of all, would you mind picking up that piece of trash behind you?" George asked.
She turned around and spotted a candy wrapper lying on the ground and so she bent down to go pick it up.
Yet as she turned around, she realized just why he had made such a request.
"Wait a minute, you just wanted an opportunity to look at my bum!" Hermione chastised him as she swatted him on the arm.
"Guilty as charged," George admitted with a grin.
"You're incorrigible," She insisted.
"You didn't mind when Harry was staring at it earlier," George pointed out, causing her to blush.
That had been something she had definitely noticed more than once this evening to her great delight.
"All right, well besides the opportunity to stare at my bum all day, what do you have in mind?" Hermione asked.
"We're actually working on a particular prank invention, but are having some considerable trouble with it, I was hoping you might be able to help us with it," George suggested.
"Are you seriously asking me to help you with a prank product?" She asked.
"Only if you want me to help you," He reminded her.
She sighed, knowing she was clearly desperate.
"Deal," She answered.
He smiled and said, "Perfect, care to seal the deal with a kiss?"
Instead she lightly slapped him, not enough to hurt anything besides his ego, reminding him once again that she simply wasn't interested in him.
Later on as the evening drew to a close, they, meaning her, George, Harry, and Cho were just now getting to the front of the Ravenclaw dorm to drop Cho off.
"Well goodbye," She heard Harry say.
"Bye," Cho answered as she headed into her common room.
No kiss, Hermione noted.
Watching Harry kiss another girl was actually something she wasn't bothered by as she would often use it later to visualize herself instead of the girl kissing Harry.
That turned her on more than she cared to admit and her mother would have washed her entire brain out with soap had she known how dirty some of her thoughts were.
Fortunately at least outwardly, her secret was safe unless some legilimens ever dained to read her mind.
They would have quite an interesting time.
At the very least, she was guiltily pleased to find that Harry and Cho's date did not appear to have gone well.
Even she knew that despite Harry's obvious crush on her, Cho wasn't his type, almost proving what she had thought earlier about Harry liking smart, attractive, fun, and funny girls. It was the last two that Cho was clearly lacking in and had probably blown any future chance with him because of that.
She would have to make sure she didn't make the same mistake.
George then asked once they were on their way back to their own common room, "so how'd it go with Cho?"
"Awful," Harry admitted, "all she could seem to do was talk about how much a jerk her ex-boyfriend Cedric was and cry."
Hahah, suck it Cho! She thought unashamedly.
"I figured Cho would be a good choice considering your crush on her," George replied.
"Unfortunately Cho isn't what I thought she would be like, she just cried and complained most of the time," Harry said, "I suppose I was due for a bad date anyway."
Yeah you were, Hermione agreed silently in her head. No wonder he seemed to be getting practically addicted to dating if all of his dates kept turning out so well.
George grinned and said, "Trust me Harry, there will be many more bad dates to come. At least she hasn't thrown water into your face and stormed out, or ran afoul of your own joke product that caused her head to swell up like a balloon and spend the rest of the date in the hospital wing, or slap you for joking about her weight, or...well you get the picture."
"You did all of those things on dates?" Harry asked him incredulously.
"No," George said evasively, "Fred did."
"Right, because Fred is the twin who does everything wrong and you're the good twin who can't do anything wrong," Harry concluded.
"How did you know Harry?" George asked with a smile.
The rest of the trip back was spent in silence although she did "accidentally" end up bumping her hips into Harry on the way back.
She was now halfway tempted to try and buy this dress from Parvati if it accomplished this much.
Her parents had given her money to get braces, but why would she ever get those except to torture herself when she had magic to fix her teeth with?
When they got to the Gryffindor common room, George pulled her aside presumably to say goodbye.
Instead he said:
"Just so you know, funny training starts tomorrow, bright and early at 10 in the history of magic classroom."
"Ten o' clock isn't early," She pointed out.
"It is to me," He answered.
Once again, she thought of how desperate she must be.
Still she said, "all right, I'll see you then."
He waved to her and then left to go up to his room, leaving her and Harry alone.
"Well I'm going to bed too," She announced to him.
"Okay, good night," He said before adding,"by the way, you looked really beautiful tonight."
She couldn't help but blush at that, and said, "you too."
After that she turned and started walking up to her own dormitory, hoping that Harry was staring at her bum again.
Yeah, she had it bad, she had to admit.
TOOMANYTOOMANYTOOMANY
Harry came down for breakfast and went and sat down between Padma and Daphne at the Ravenclaw table.
"Hey girls," He greeted.
"Hey Harry," Padma replied back.
"Morning Harry," Daphne also greeted.
"Hello Harry," He heard a voice say from behind him.
As he turned around, his jaw dropped as he spotted Luna currently dressed in a pirate uniform, a large pirate hat with a skull and crossbones on the front, and a long black coat that had the interesting effect of drawing attention to her blonde hair.
Tall black boots completed the costume.
"You look awesome!" Daphne exclaimed.
"Thanks," Luna said, looking pleased that her costume had been so well received.
"Um, it really is cool, but why are you dressed like a pirate?" Padma queried.
"Since it's fun!" Luna told her happily, "I decided I wanted to be a pirate today. I'm Captain Luna, the scurviest pirate to ever sail the 7 Seas of Chocolate."
Padma laughed and then said, "I think scurvy is when you don't get enough fruits and vegetables, so if you're the scurviest, then you'd better come eat an apple."
"I'm going to eat a whole bushel of apples," Luna declared as she sat down.
"I wish I had a pirate costume," Daphne said jealously.
"I'll bet the Room of Requirement has one, I wouldn't even be surprised if it even could have its own pirate ship," Harry suggested.
A light seemed to come on to Daphne's face as she exclaimed, "I know what we're going to do today. We'll go to the Room of Requirement and pretend to be pirates."
"Ooh, that sounds like fun," Padma quickly agreed.
"Hey, where's Perry?" Luna asked, "he might want to play."
As if to answer her question, her faithful parrot swooped down onto her shoulder.
"Oh, there you are Perry," Luna said affectionately.
"Well I suppose we can go right after breakfast," Harry urged.
All of them then paused to watch the familiar sight of the breakfast rush of owls now swooping in to deliver the mail, arriving only a few seconds after Perry.
Personally he was wondering if all the Christmas roses he had gotten for each of the girls he had been on dates with would arrive that morning.
It would be either today or tomorrow, he reasoned. He'd seen no need to put it off until Christmas, where they would no doubt be nearly forgotten by the many other gifts each girl was sure to receive.
Whatever he had been expecting however was nothing compared to what he saw.
He spotted 6 large barn owls swoop in, all carrying one huge package that appeared to be big enough to carry an adolescent dragon inside it and drop it onto the table in front of Susan Bones.
That didn't mean it was his of course. It could easily be from someone else, perhaps her aunt who she lived with.
However that thought was dashed as 12 more owls swooped in in 2 groups of 6, each carrying and dropping packages in front of Hannah and Angelina.
"What on earth?" He asked aloud.
Unless he had gotten the biggest roses on earth delivered to each girl, there was no way they were getting what he had ordered for them.
Exasperatedly, he could only watch in wonder as Fleur and Gabrielle also got large packages.
Even Lavender and Pansy, who he'd decided at the last minute to send a rose to each got one.
Daphne, who had also been watching the display, questioned:
"What were you trying to do? Ask for their hand in marriage Harry? Maybe send a cow as a dowry?"
"You should have sent one to my grandma then, she would have married you for a cow," Padma answered.
"I'd have married Harry for a cow," Luna agreed.
"You'd have married Harry for nothing," Daphne pointed out.
"I know, don't have a cow," Luna scolded.
He however was now totally focused on all those packages.
This was a mistake, it had to be a mistake. Or perhaps a dream. Professor Dumbledore, now a unicorn but still with a white beard was going to pop out and wish him a happy birthday or something.
"One of you girls slap me and wake me up from this dream," He suggested.
"Okay," Daphne agreed as she slapped him across the face.
"Ouch!" He yelled, now annoyed first that he hadn't woken up and second that he was now in pain, "I didn't mean literally."
"You asked me too!" She reminded him.
Why was stuff like this always happening to him? He thought, thinking more about all the packages being sent than the slap, although that was on his mind too.
He couldn't seem to even send girls flowers without messing it up.
Don't panic, he told himself, perhaps the company was just super careful about packaging and put each flower in between wayyyyy too many packing peanuts.
He got up and headed over to the Gryffindor table where Lavender was unwrapping her package to find out just what was in them.
To his shock, instead of a single rose contained in it, there was a whole bouquet of flowers, a large box of chocolates, two Christmas books, a gift certificate for Honeydukes as well as one for The Three Broomsticks, and a gold necklace."
They might as well have just added a partridge in a pear tree for all the stuff that had been sent.
"Wow!" Lavender breathed as she revealed the last item in the package, the gold necklace as she put it around her neck.
"Um, look I can explain," He tried to say.
She turned around when she realized he was there and said, "You certainly know how to go all out for a girl, Harry."
"I'd have agreed to do you too if you had gotten me all that," Parvati admitted.
If Lavender didn't think he wanted to have sex with her, she certainly would now after sending her such extravagant gifts, he realized.
Before thinking it through, he yelled, "I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX!"
He yelled it so loudly that nearly everyone in the entire Great Hall heard it. Some of the older students even tried to hastily cover some of the first year's ears.
"Sorry," He said sheepishly to everyone.
"Then why did you get me all of this stuff then?" Lavender asked him.
"I didn't...," He tried to say.
He sent a silent prayer to whatever deity was seeming to have fun at his expense to come and rescue him.
Instead, came Padma, Daphne, and Luna who came up behind him.
Each girl could easily pass for a goddess, but they still weren't exactly what he was hoping for.
"Actually, Harry got them for all the girls he went on dates with or in your case will," Padma explained.
"Why such extravagant gifts?" Lavender asked.
"Since Harry is filthy rich and can afford it," Daphne answered, "for someone poor, a mere flower would have been satisfactory, but Harry knew that if he got you just that it would show that he was being a cheapskate since he can obviously afford something much nicer."
Thank goodness for being rich, he thought. For the first time ever, he was actually quite okay with showing off his wealth.
In any case, Lavender seemed to accept such a response.
"Oh, well I wish I had known," Lavender claimed, "I was kind of thinking it meant something else."
He was about to explain himself when he was suddenly accosted by someone grabbing him.
The oxygen was nearly squeezed out of his lungs before another person got him from behind as he was sandwiched between them.
As they released him, he realized it was Susan and Hannah.
Never mind, he could learn to live without oxygen if it meant being hugged by both girls.
"Thank you Harry," Susan said brightly.
"Yeah, thank you so much," Hannah gushed.
"Uh, no problem," He answered.
Daphne took the opportunity to explain why he did it to them as well and as she did so, he noticed Fleur, Gabrielle, and Angelina now nearby as well to offer their thanks.
"I'm kind of confused," Susan admitted, "I'm guessing you got us the deluxe package from that catalogue and that's supposed to be for someone you're taking as a date to a Yule Ball."
Dread filled him as he thought, not again.
Fortunately Daphne and Padma stepped in again to save him.
"In addition to letting you know he was thinking of you, Harry wanted to make up for not taking you to the Yule Ball like you had originally planned on and thus opted to get you what you would have received had you gone with him," Daphne informed them, "for those of you he didn't ask but went on a date with, he just wanted to make sure that you weren't left out either, and express his thanks on having enjoyed such a remarkable evening you."
"He'd also like to ask that he get to have at least one dance with each of you," Padma invited, "it can't make up for the real thing of going with him, but at least it's something."
"Oh of course, I would love that," Hannah quickly agreed.
Quite honestly, he could have kissed Padma and Daphne right then for thinking so quickly on their feet.
Then again, to be fair he would have wanted to kiss them anyway.
Just when it seemed like things were finally getting straightened out however, he heard someone yell angrily,
"POTTER!"
He turned to look in the direction of the sound of the voice as he spotted Draco Malfoy striding toward him, even though he was still way far away.
"What is the meaning of this?" He screeched, still loud enough for pretty much the entire hall to hear, "trying to steal my girl?"
He was evidently referring to Pansy having gotten a package as well.
His original intention for Pansy was a simple rose and probably would have made Malfoy upset as well, but for this he was fuming.
"What are you talking about Malfoy?" Daphne called out to him, "I wasn't aware you even liked girls, especially considering your profession of love to Harry yesterday."
"I"M NOT GAY!" Malfoy yelled as he continued to get closer, "some coward fed me a love potion."
"Right, I'm sure," Padma answered sarcastically, "you seem to love yourself at least an awful lot."
"Malfoy and just Malfoy sitting in a tree, g," Daphne sang.
It was anatomically impossible to kiss yourself on the lips, but it still filled Malfoy with rage who was just now getting to them.
Before he could however Malfoy suddenly slipped on a puddle of milk, causing him to suddenly slide right into Snape in front of him, who happened to be on his own way to the scene, likely having heard the commotion and was hoping to try and get Harry into trouble for any reason he could get away with.
Draco ended up driving his face right into Snape's butt as he fell, creating an absolutely hilarious and "unbelievable that it actually happened" scene.
Those who were watching couldn't help but laugh, including himself.
"I told you that Malfoy was a buttkisser to Snape," Daphne whispered to Padma.
"Well we all know Snape loves that so he should be rather happy right about now," Padma replied as she continued to watch.
Snape looked livid, for the first time ever now looking at Malfoy now very annoyed.
"Sorry Professor," Malfoy mumbled as he struggled to get up.
"Ten points from Slytherin!" Snape declared to everyone's shock.
Yet to show that the universe was not totally upside down now, he then yelled, "Twenty points from all the other houses for laughing at me."
He strode from the hall, now in a foul mood as he left.
Once he was gone however, everyone went back to snickering at having witnessed such a display.
He himself was still going over it in his mind when he heard someone call his name to shake him out of his thoughts.
After turning in the direction of the voice, he realized it was Pansy, but he had absolutely no time to react befofe came towards him and kissed him right on the lips.
That's it, he thought. Every seemingly impossible thing had now happened this morning.
Pansy Parkinson of all people had just kissed him.
Two weeks ago if that happened he would have been totally disgusted by such a display and tried to wipe his mouth, then spit, then washed his lips with soap, then his whole body, and then had his lips removed by magic and replaced with ones that Pansy had not touched.
Today however he merely accepted that it was actually a pretty good kiss.
"Kissing Potter?" Malfoy roared at Pansy as he was now trying to come after him again.
Harry tried to defuse the situation, but probably only made it worse with what he next said.
"Hey, you shouldn't be all that upset, you tried to kiss me yesterday, I'd consider it even," Harry pointed out.
Malfoy now had his wand pointed at her.
Before he could do anything however, Professor Dumbledore got there.
"It appears we've been very busy Mr. Potter," Dumbledore said, having the nerve to be cheerful as he looked at the many girls assembled around him along with some of the many presents that had been sent.
"Sorry, Professor, I didn't mean to cause such a scene," Harry claimed.
"I would imagine not," Dumbledore answered with a twinkle in his eye before he addressed Malfoy, "as for you Mr. Malfoy I heard that you are apparently getting teased about your shall we say sexual orientation, and I just want you to know that I'm happy to try and help you resolve these issues. One of our teachers in fact is considering creating a gay/lesbian support group and I think maybe it might be beneficial to you to attend."
Malfoy looked livid, but was smart enough not to act rashly towards the headmaster.
Harry grinned and couldn't resist saying, "I think that could really be beneficial to him, professor."
Dumbledore answered with: "Contrary to popular opinion, I am in fact not gay, but having been considered to be has led me to be rather sympathetic to the plight of our students who may face such a challenge."
"Don't worry, Professor, I never thought you were," Harry said, offering his confidence.
"I still remember fondly my time with a certain witch...," Dumbledore added.
"Ewww, old people sex!" Daphne interrupted, crinkling her nose.
Dumbledore chuckled and said, "You are quite right, Ms. Greengrass. However you'll find that when you get old it isn't nearly as bad as you might have thought."
"Oh, I'm going to stay young forever!" Daphne insisted.
"No you won't and you'll like old people sex too," Luna told her.
"Professor," Harry asked him, "I think I had better tell you what really went on."
"I think it would be better if we had a private conversation you and I," Dumbledore recommended, "how about you come with me?"
Harry looked over at Padma, Daphne, and Luna.
"It's all right, you can meet up with us in the Room of Requirement later," Daphne offered.
He nodded and then followed Dumbledore inside the room that he had gone into after being chosen as a Hogwarts champion.
When they finally got inside, Dumbledore sat down in a chair that he conjured for himself before conjuring him one too for him to sit in which he did so.
Dumbledore then said, "so let's hear your little story."
Harry began to tell him about sending the order form for the catalogue.
"The problem is," Harry explained, "unless I somehow wasn't paying attention and ordered the wrong stuff or the company that I sent it to sent me the wrong stuff by mistake, I don't see how this could have happened."
Dumbledore seemed to think for a moment before declaring, "It is indeed a mystery. Did the order form change hands at all before you sent it?"
"I did give it to Luna to send," Harry admitted, "you don't think that maybe she might have…"
"I would say that would appear to be impossible," Dumbledore pointed out, "every order has to have their bank account information, a signed signature at the bottom, the items ordered clearly written out along with their cost, and is all keyed into a person's magical signature. The first two you already did, but changing the items with their magical signature would be far too difficult for even an exceptionally skilled wizard, much less a 3rd year. Besides, what reason would she have for doing such a thing?"
"I suppose you're right," Harry admitted, "I didn't mean to accuse her."
"In my experience it is quite difficult to find someone that you can truly trust," Dumbledore advised, "however from what I know of Ms. Lovegood, she only wishes you good, which is quite a rare thing to find in a person. I would hope that you will be able to become good friends."
Harry smiled and said, "I plan on it Professor."
Dumbledore nodded and said, "At any rate, I daresay this incident wasn't too damaging at all for you. You appear to have earned the thanks of many young ladies and even had it expressed in such a way that I would wager is worth more to you than the loss of perhaps a few galleons.
A thought suddenly came to him.
"Professor, I've always wondered just where my parents even got all that money I inherited in the first place. If they were hiding from Voldemort, surely they wouldn't have been able to work at the same time," Harry answered.
Dumbledore looked at him for a moment and then said, "First of all, they inherited a great deal of money from your father's parents. Also over the years, many people have donated to you in order to express thanks for your role in defeating Voldemort. Other than that, the money has gone totally untouched due to you being under muggle asylum."
"Muggle asylum?" Harry asked, trying to figure out just what Dumbledore meant.
Dumbledore's eyebrows rose as he then asked, "You mean that Hagrid never explained it to you? I specifically asked him to do so."
At his silence Dumbledore then said, "I gather from your silence that Hagrid did indeed not tell you which leaves you finding out much later than I would have wanted. After the defeat of Voldemort, there was a considerable amount of debate waged in the Wizengamot as to where you should go. Many felt that you should go to a wizarding family, and unfortunately the ones with the most legitimate claim to you was the Malfoys."
"Are you saying that if I hadn't gone to live with the Dursleys I would have ended up being raised by the Malfoys?" Harry asked incredulously.
As much as he had hated living with the Dursleys, the Malfoys were bound to have been 100 times worse. For the first time, he was suddenly grateful that he had grown up with them.
"Yes," Dumbledore replied, "obviously I nor many people wanted that, but thankfully you had your muggle relatives who had an even stronger claim. I had also hoped that perhaps living in the muggle world would help prevent you from getting too much of a big head from your unavoidable fame. The only problem however was that due to your muggle relatives being muggles, they had no legitimate claim to your money in the wizard world and I knew that if I didn't act that the Malfoys would find a way of getting to it long before you would be old enough to fight them on it.
In order to prevent this I was able to get you put under muggle asylum, where an individual is able to hide within the muggle world without the capability of the wizard world being able to interact with them. This caused all of your assets to be frozen until you turned 11 and elected to rejoin the wizard world, but also prevented anyone from the wizard world being able to see you or your muggle relatives or find out your location. Obviously since there were still death eaters out there looking for you I considered this the safest possible solution."
Harry's mind was reeling, having known none of this. It did however explain an awful lot, including why nobody had ever come to visit him or contacted him before he got his first letter of invitation to Hogwarts.
While it had prevented him from finding out he was wizard until then, that wasn't Dumbledore's fault having probably assumed that his muggle relatives would tell him, nor was it his fault that he had not known about the Dursleys' abuse.
It was at least far better than growing up a Malfoy or having the Malfoys get all of his money or have death eaters find him.
"I'm starting to understand a great deal now Professor," Harry replied.
"I would imagine you would," Dumbledore agreed, "you see, contrary to many people's assumption I was unable to have any interaction with you whatsoever. In fact I could not even discuss things over with your relatives before leaving you with them with you already under muggle asylum. The most I was able to do was leave you with a letter along with an explanation. It appears however that they never elected to do so which has caused me great concern."
Harry let that sink in for a moment before asking his next question.
"Professor, while I'm grateful for what you did and I understand why you did it, I'm kind of wondering if it might be possible for me to not have to go back to live with the Dursleys but not have to end with the Malfoys," Harry admitted.
"It would depend," Dumbledore concluded, "first there would have to be a reason to be removed from the Dursleys care, but if so, then a magical judge would have to decide where you should be placed. The Malfoys would indeed be the first choice, but since you are now old enough to speak and make decisions on your own, your opinion would hold enough weight for the Malfoys to be excluded from possible caretakers, leaving you free to choose a different caretaker as long as they have made it known that they wish to be able to care for you and are proven competent to be able to do so. I would however recommend that you spend the rest of the holidays making sure that is the decision you wish to make."
"All right," Harry agreed.
That sounded fair. It would also give him time to decide just who he wanted to adopt him.
Wow that sounded so weird but so good too.
"I think that's enough for today," Harry claimed, "you've already given me plenty to think about."
"I apologize for possibly making things difficult for you Harry," Dumbledore told him.
"It's all right Professor, thank you for your help," Harry answered as he left.
He headed over to the Room of Requirement to meet up with the girls, but on the way decided not to tell any of them anything so he could have the opportunity to think about it himself first.
Yet when he got inside the room he was amazed to find the room now appeared to be the setting for a Pirate movie.
A huge pirate ship dominated the room, towering high into the air, complete with a pirate flag and sails.
"What the?" He asked.
"Welcome aboard landlubber," Luna yelled as she swung down from a rope and onto the ground in front of him.
"How was your date with Dumbledore?" Daphne joked as she came up beside him.
Daphne was also dressed in a pirate costume although hers had much less big of a hat than Luna's and her top was a bit too small, leaving some tantalizing cleavage and large gold hoop earrings dangling from her ears.
She did however have what appeared to be a fake musket.
Or at least he thought it was a musket. He wasn't exactly an expert on guns.
"I felt like he was a little too old and male for me," Harry replied to her question.
"Yeah, but at least he's got a cool white beard that you can yank on," Luna pointed out.
"I suppose there is that," He agreed.
"So what did he say?" Padma asked as she also came over, her own pirate costume very similar to Daphne's.
"Oh, just wanted to know what happened, that's all," Harry said, deflecting the question so he didn't have to really answer, "so you got a costume for me?"
"We sure do," Luna announced as she brought him a fake mustache and beard.
Padma held the rest of the costume.
This one came with a long black trenchcoat type coat, a white shirt, black pants, a black tri-corn hat, and even a big, black curly haired wig.
"Now this is sweet!" He replied as he looked at it, "um, would you girls mind if you turned away while I got dressed?"
"I want to see you nakkie Harry," Luna pouted.
"Don't we all?" Daphne joked.
He was a bit hesitant after that remark, so he went to go change inside one of the rooms of the pirate ship.
When he came out, he felt like a pirate, although the fake beard and mustache felt a little scratchy.
"Calico Jack, have you found my booty?" Daphne asked him once she saw him.
Luna giggled and pointed at Daphne's bum.
"It's right there silly," She told her.
"Are we going to go tell lame pirate jokes all day?" Padma asked.
"Like I have a big chest or guys want me treasure?" Daphne suggested.
"Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?" Luna added.
"Lives in a pineapple under the sea?" Harry asked, confused, "what on earth does that have anything to do with pirates?"
"You'll find out," Luna simply said.
He shook his head again before saying, "Well I do want to thank you girls for getting me out of what happened this morning."
"No problem Harry, we were happy to save you from being thanked by beautiful girls," Padma joked.
"Well at any rate, thank you, and I'll make it up to you," He answered.
"Like maybe I don't know...a trip to Atlantis?" Daphne suggested.
He frowned and said, "Don't get greedy, I was thinking more like a kiss."
"That sounds more like a present for you," Padma pointed out.
"I'll take the kiss," Luna answered immediately.
He grinned at the other two girls and said cheekily, "You see? Luna knows what a good present is."
Harry leaned in and kissed her, before the other two girls went over to get their kisses as well.
"I suppose it's a start, but it doesn't get you entirely off the hook," Daphne answered as she held up a pirate hook.
"If you don't get us Christmas presents you'll have to walk the plank," Padma said, adding to the lame pirate jokes.
"Or get eaten by starfish," Luna replied.
"Get eaten by starfish?" Daphne asked in confusion.
"It's what would have happened to you had I not saved you," Luna admitted.
They were needless to say quite confused by this statement, but then he took advantage of the silence and proclaimed, "Don't worry, I'll get some nice gifts for you all. I'll put my budget at a galleon each."
"That's enough for fake poo!" Luna said excitedly, referring to what she had seen in the catalogue.
Harry shook his head. Luna certainly was a strange one, but he really liked her nonetheless.
"I think you can come up with something better than that," Padma argued.
He grinned and said, "Don't worry I will."
"Come on let's go play," Padma then suggested, "where are we going to Captain Luna?"
The blonde ravenclaw picked up a sword and declared, "To treasure island!"
They all hastened to follow her.
Author's Note: A few problems I noticed while writing this chapter. First of all, since this story is meant to be a romantic comedy, Hermione simply doesn't fit well into it due to her usual rather serious personality. Therefore in order for her to remain a part of the story, she would have to somehow develop a good sense of humor. Having her try to develop a sense of humor, especially with the Twins help however should be quite funny as well.
Also there is the problem of having an actually good Dumbledore for once. In order for him to be considered good, there would have to be a good explanation for his frequently failing Harry, including why he never checked up on or sent anyone to check up on Harry. The idea I came up with was so good and so believable enough that I couldn't resist including it, and also gives Harry the opportunity to finally be free of the Dursleys.
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