A/N: It's your lucky day or unlucky day! (depending on how you look at it.) So why am I posting early? Well remember that femslash poll After Ellen is doing I told you about? Bechloe is in round three and up against Swan Queen (? – I don't follow this ship). It's a really close race so far. Bechloe is literally ahead by roughly 1%. If you are invested in a possible Sendrick interview centering on Bechloe, you should go vote. Which is why I am here, to encourage you to go vote. I know the poll is a little jammed up last I checked due to the over flow, but keep an eye on it, you can vote every hour. Round 3 voting ends Friday! I'm posting this chapter with this message because I hate it when you think there is a new chapter only to find it's an author's note. It's really annoying. So I give you the new chapter!

Thank you for all the favorites, follows, and reviews! I can't believe the numbers are still increasing. I've had a lot of fun replying to questions and concerns. I hope you enjoy the new chapter!

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Chapter 6

A few hours later, it was like the whole tea conversation had never happened. It was never mentioned again. It was like there was an unspoken rule that it was not to be mentioned. Ever. They were both too busy anyway to dwell on it. Beca having to actually attend class and complete assignments. Then there was also Chloe, Bellas' practices, Chloe, mixing, and something about an upcoming riff-off. No one really took the time to explain the event to her either, every time she brought it up the conversation was interrupted, usually by someone doing something stupid. The someone in question usually was Amy or Stacie, both girls being a lot to handle. Jesse's schedule was pretty much the same only with practices involving the treblemakers and his Chloe slots usually were filled by Benji or Beca, sometimes both.

Which was completely fine with Beca because she could pretend it never happened and that she didn't have more than platonic feelings for Chloe. She could spend her time with the older girl pretending all the stomach flips, heart flutters, butterflies, and sweaty palms just had to do with the change in seasons or something she ate. It was definitely not right and Beca knew that. She knew she was lying to herself, but it made it easier. Especially when Chloe just seemed to continually invade her personal space, daily. If not during practice, it was while they were lounging around on campus, where Chloe had once again found the petite woman hidden away somewhere.

Sure, things had become easier at practices. Beca could anticipate when Chloe was most likely to invade her space. When the older woman would decide to place her hands on her hips to correct a shake or swivel. She knew when to expect hands to trail down her arms lightly because those damn boxes still seemed to give Beca some trouble. And she knew when there would be lips close to her ear, hot breath ghosting over sensitive spots of her neck. It allowed her to control the heat that wanted to spring to her cheeks and the shiver that almost always followed. Well, at least she could hide them better. The latest development of goose bumps that seemed to randomly arise at the most subtle of touches, were usually hidden under long sleeves or could be excused by Beca claiming she was cold. She was such a small petite thing no one questioned it. The touches that always puzzled Beca usually took place outside of practice, where there were no bellas, but a far bigger crowd of people to take in the clearly flustered brunette.

At times it seemed like Chloe was playing a game with Beca that she never agreed to play. A modified version of hot potato, involving Chloe quickly touching various platonic expanses of Beca's body and Beca feeling like she was burning. It could be the most innocent of touches from a light brushing of fingers to a light squeeze to her knee. Then there were hugs that were used in place of greetings, congratulations, and thank yous. Really Beca would have thought hugs would be easy to get used to, but they weren't. Chloe seemed to have one for every day of the week and every occasion, as if her hugs were the embodiment of a hallmark card. Some were light and airy, a light wrapping of arms around Beca's neck and then a release, so quick Beca sometimes wasn't sure Chloe was there. The only indication she was a small cloud of floral perfume left behind. Then there were the hugs when Chloe was excited, quickly pulling Beca in before the redhead's whole body shakes against her, swaying them side to side. Even those vary, sometimes involving Beca being lifted an inch or two off the ground before being set back down and released. There are the 'I'm so happy to see you' hugs that involve full body contact, cheeks brushing as hips and chests become flush against the other's. Those hugs always seem to be held just a little longer than would seem appropriate for two people that are just supposed to be friends.

Then there are Beca's favorite hugs. The ones that start off light, but Chloe slowly sinks further into until their bodies are flush. Chloe nuzzles her face into the bend where Beca's neck becomes shoulder. She can feel her friend inhale deeply, as her body relaxes into Beca's. It is perfect. It's a hug that makes Beca feel needed, even wanted. Like she was someone important who played the very important role of calming and comforting Chloe Beale. The very embodiment of the sun. A ball of pure energy and life. Like all hugs involving Chloe, it ends too soon and leaves her body hot and wanting, then cold at the loss of contact.

It was the type of hug Beca receives right before the riff-off. It does nothing to calm her nerves. It only serves to distract her for a moment before she was presented with the other a capella clubs and all the people sitting on the edge of the pool looking down on them. Then it only adds to her nerves, her body fully a tuned to Chloe's proximity and how her friend's body feels pressed up against hers. That's all she can think about. She was shaken out of stupor when the groups began to gather and a guy came forward with a mic to announce the categories and rules for the night. Beca was still not sure what was going on, but stayed back and takes it in.

Jesse can't seem to help himself. Mouthing she was going down with accompanying hand motions. Beca simply smirked and mouthed back she didn't care. She can feel Aubrey glaring at her. The blonde had accused her of having a thing for Jesse multiple times already. Half the time she wanted to tell her that she had been there and done that and had no interest in recommitting any actions taken during the time period she dated Jesse, but where would the fun in that be. The subject seemed to rile the blonde up more than anything else Beca did. So she really didn't care what her captain thought.

Then the first round started and she couldn't help smirking at her friend. He was such a nerd, getting a little bit too into the whole thing. She really wanted to rib him with little jabs at his believed coolness. There would be time for that later though. Her main focus the Bellas, one in particular. She tried not to stare and hung back, slowly understanding the rules, her nerves fading and confidence building. Her mind trying to come up with appropriate songs to match the words of the song being sung. It was the perfect musical competition for her. After all she spent most of her time matching and blending songs together. Given normally she focused on the beats and not the lyrics, but it really couldn't be that much different. Just to be sure that she had the rules right, she quickly checked in with Chloe to make sure she could sing anything that would fit. With a confirming squeeze to her forearm and nod, Beca was set.

The Bellas were doing well and Beca thought maybe she would never actually have to sing lead. Which she was perfectly fine with, but then she saw the look in Jesse's eye. Pure cockiness that he had won. He easily interrupted Stacie's song. Then he was pointing at Beca as if to say he was showing her that he had called it earlier when he told her she was going down. She lets him bask in his glory because her mind was already flipping through her mental rolodex of songs, trying to find the perfect one. Her mind was quickly narrowing down her options to just a hand full. She blows him a sarcastic kiss because she knows she has it. The perfect song to wipe that cocky grin off his face. He was the epitome of a dork because he was pulling at his coat and making pointed looks like he was the headline of a concert.

Then he says it. The line she needs to cut in with 'No Diggity' and she runs forward as if afraid that if she doesn't the opportunity will disappear. Half of her action was from the pure excitement of knowing she would be besting her best friend within moments. Then she was rapping, enjoying how Jesse's face falls in surprise. Apparently not expecting her to rap, along with everyone else. Beca turns taking in the awed silence around her. She just catches the tail end of Chloe slack jawed looking at her in awe. It makes her heart jump in her chest, pushing her to continue even as she worries she did something wrong because of the deafening silence. Then she takes in Aubrey, completely confused and out of her depth with Beca's choice. Beca can't hold back the smirk, knowing her choice was correct just no one knew it. She took in the other Bellas, noting a few quizzical looks as they mouthed the words. Finally it clicks as she launches into singing, Fat Amy the first one to join in. Then slowly everyone joins in, including the other a capella groups and audience sitting on the edge of the pool. Beca feels powerful and completely in control for once. She can't believe she made this beautiful sound happen, turning around the pool to take in all the harmonizing voices, noting a beaming Chloe dancing in place. Then it's over and she is telling Jesse to suck it. For once he doesn't have a witty comment.

It comes crashing down right after though because apparently Beca can't do anything right. The bellas loose over the difference between "it" and It's". Beca thinks it's stupid and voices as much with different words. Of course, instead of looking at how good they all sounded together, actually managing to harmonize for once, all Aubrey can see is the loss. Beca wonders if it was anyone else's song choice if Aubrey's reaction would be different. Or if Aubrey had known the song and was able to sing a long if it would it be any different. It was too late to wonder such things because Aubrey was already yelling at them and telling them they needed to do better, even though she had no suggestions on how they were going achieve 'better'. Luckily she let everyone stay and drink. The Bellas spread out and mingled with the other groups.

Beca had grabbed a cup of something alcoholic and perched herself on the side of the pool next to Benji. They chatted for a bit about random subjects. She was only half paying attention, mildly distracted by Chloe dancing with some of the girls from the team, her yellow cup in hand. Beca wondered if it had always been Chloe's favorite cup or it was a recent development. It was the same cup Beca had used to perform her audition song. Chloe seemed to always have it on her. It was thoughts like those that drove Beca into the wee hours of the night mixing mash-up after mash-up comprised of songs that reminded her of Chloe until the thought was gone. Benji must have noticed she was distracted, excusing himself to go get a drink. Jesse must have intercepted him because the boy never came back. She scanned the pool for them and sure enough there they were off to the side on the other end of the pool by the drinks.

She lazily swings her eyes back to where Chloe was dancing, taking a sip of her drink, only to find the redhead had vanished. Beca did a sweep of the pool, looking for copper locks only to come up empty. A body plops down next to her just as she is contemplating joining Jesse and Benji. She doesn't even have to turn to know who it is, a cloud of floral perfume over taking her senses, reminding Beca of spring and warm summer days. She turns anyway. There's Chloe, feet dangling, all soft smiles almost shy, like she was afraid Beca was going to tell her to go away. Of course Beca won't. The smile puzzles Beca though. The Chloe she knew was never shy. She charged into every situation, no matter how scary, with little to no thought and often succeeded. Beca wondered where this shy woman that looked so much like her best friend came from. The same girl who used to talk to strangers at street corners, a younger Beca pulling on her sleeve for them to go, trying to mouth 'stranger danger' to her friend. The girl that now sat shyly next to her as if they had never met. Chloe still did that, talked to random people around campus like they were the best of friends when they had just met. There were these moments though, like this one, where Chloe was a ghost of herself, shy and reserved when met with Beca. Small things like that perplexed the younger Bella at times. They made her wonder what Chloe was thinking.

Then whatever shyness Beca thought she saw was gone as soon as it had appeared. Chloe has one of her easy jovial smiles in place and she was obviously drunk, the way she bumps against Beca's shoulder not nearly as graceful as normal. Beca cannot stop the smile that over takes her face, trying to hide it behind her cup as she takes a drink.

Her drink never makes it to her stomach, spitting it out, into the pool, as she chokes at Chloe's sincere utterance of, "You're so hot."

Apparently shy Chloe was completely gone. It takes a moment for the younger girl to compose herself, her face a flame with red cheeks. For once she can blame it on something other than embarrassment convincingly. "Dude, What?"

"I really liked the way you worked it. " Chloe's smile turned flirty as she bumped her shoulder into Beca's and winked. Beca's face somehow became warmer as she blinked owlishly at her old friend. "I never knew you could rap. Totes hot! An aca-tastic performance. I give you 10 out of 10 and a bucket of ice water. For reasons…" She wiggled her eyebrows at that last statement. Chloe seems far too pleased with herself, her smile growing bigger by the second, biting her lip lightly, as if trying to hold it back, as her eyes skimmed over Beca's face. The redhead's facial expression shifted once again to something that could be considered almost seductive.

Beca took a hefty swig of her drink, looking anywhere other than at Chloe, before speaking. "You're drunk."

"Doesn't mean I'm blind or deaf." Chloe shot back, sounding slightly put off.

Beca thought it would be safe to look back at Chloe, but was wrong like always, met with a flirty grin. The younger girl just gulped. "Whatever you say killer."

Her statement caused the redhead to laugh, shifting her face to the usual manageable beaming smile Beca was used to. Then everything was fine. Beca could breathe easily again, her heart settling to a normal pace in her chest. They sat in an easy silence for a while, Chloe playfully nudging her feet occasionally, getting the wanted response of a nudge in return. Not long after the silence started, there was a warmth pushing up Beca's sleeve and gliding across her bare forearm, leaving a trail of goosebumps. She looked over to see her friend looking intently at her arm as she ran her fingers back and forth in a distinct pattern, her attention completely captured. Instead of taking in the raised flesh, Chloe was transfixed by the tattoo of a grasshopper that lay under her fingertips, tracing the lines

Chloe smiled fondly at it, her eyes never leaving the image as she continued to trace. "Remember when we used to catch grasshoppers as kids?"

Chloe was going to continue, but Beca cut her off, a similar smile found on her face as she was transported back in time. Her voice was soft as if any other utterance would break the memory. "How could I forget… I was new in town, only 5, and I was riding my tricycle around the block. It was brand new- I think blue with tassels- anyway, and those assholes down the block stopped me at the corner. They wanted my bike, but I wouldn't get off. They were going to hit me. Then the most beautiful girl I had ever seen, all cute with bouncing curled red pigtails and the bluest eyes known to man, stopped them. Dude, she decked them. Not only that, she asked me to go catch grasshoppers with her. Didn't even care about the snot running from my nose. Then we became best friends and then-then…" Beca trailed off at the end, looking up at Chloe, the smile on her face shifted to something close to sadness. To loss. Chloe looked on with awe taking in everything Beca was saying. Specifically how she saw her.

Beca noticing Chloe's eyes taking in everything, turned away, feeling far too vulnerable as she thought about 12 year old Beca. Everything she had lost. Then she flushed, realizing what she had said. What she had revealed about herself. What her tattoo stood for. She recomposed herself, letting the walls of indifference fall back into place. It felt safer there. She puffed out some air before, going for nonchalance as she turned to Chloe once more, composed. "Funny what things you remember, huh."

Chloe continued to look at her, clearly trying to work something out, her eyes flicking from Beca's one eye and then to the other. She could feel herself starting to break, her recent feelings to close to 12 year old Beca's to differentiate from. She felt herself slipping. So she looked away. Only Chloe wouldn't let her. The fingers that had stilled on her forearm at some point during Beca's retelling of a fond memory, were caressing and then pushing at the younger girl's chin so that she would look at her. Suddenly Chloe appeared to be a lot sober than she did before. Serious conversations appeared to have that effect on both of them. Her voice was steady and strong as she spoke.

'You don't have to do that…" Beca tried to break away from the hand securing her face in place and stutter out some sarcastic response, but Chloe held her in place. "You don't have to put up any walls with me Becs. We were best friends, still are. We used to talk to each other about everything. We would tell each other stuff. You don't have to close yourself off to me. Okay?"

At the second securing of her face, forcing her to look at Chloe, Beca couldn't stop herself from looking at Chloe's eyes. She was quickly drawn in, hypnotized. She could see the sincerity in Chloe's eyes, the tears just at the edge. She wanted to say yes. She really did, but there were too many past tenses in Chloe's speech and Beca knew better. They didn't tell each other everything. She didn't tell Chloe everything. She was not the same Beca she knew from when Chloe was 15 and she was 12. Just like Chloe was not the same Chloe she knew and she was realizing that as she thought back to the memory of 8 year old Chloe standing up for 5 year old Beca. That girl used to be fearless. She would have never let Aubrey walk all over her or disregard her. She would never be so hesitant like she had been before with Beca just moments after sitting down beside her. She would be like the Chloe who walked into her shower because she heard a song she liked and enjoyed the person singing it. Sure that fearless girl that protected and brought Beca out of her shell that she once knew was still there, but now there were different variables that allowed her to be her in certain moments. Beca wanted to know who squashed that girl. Who hindered her flame because she hated that person. Funnily enough, Beca was picking up their slack. She was becoming Chloe's protector, speaking up for her when Aubrey pushed her too hard or bridging silences as Chloe peered across at her shyly. And she didn't want to disappoint her and that's why she couldn't answer that question because she couldn't let her walls down. She couldn't show Chloe what laid beyond. She wouldn't like it. No one did.

She doesn't have to answer though because Chloe was pulling her into a hug. This one was different than the other ones. It was desperate and needy. It realized everything, felt everything and for once, Beca feels suffocated in Chloe's arms. For once the hug lasts to long and Beca was not left hot and wanting, just relieved. Relieved it was over. Then Chloe was holding her by her forearms and the tears are just on the rim of Chloe's eyes, ready to fall and Beca knows she has already failed. Maybe by Beca's non-response Chloe has glimpsed a part of Beca beyond her walls. She was almost certain she had.

And Chloe was speaking, in a strained voice. It takes a moment for Beca to catch up to the words, but the delay doesn't make them hurt any less. "What happened? You used to be so open. You used to be so carefree. Who broke you?" and finally after a pause she asked in the most vulnerable voice, breaking Beca's heart, "Why didn't you call me?"

If it was any other situation and Beca was anyone else but herself, she might have found Chloe's questions comical or at least ironic. She had the same ones, well minus the last one, for the redhead. In her new role, protector, Beca knew she couldn't answer because every answer went back to one person. The same person that sat next to her, just looking at her will watery bluer than blue eyes. She was the start of it all. Beca wanted to tell her, but she couldn't because Chloe wouldn't understand. And then Beca would have to show herself. All of herself and that would be the very definition of suicide because it would destroy her. Just like last time, only this time Beca was not sure she would be able to get up from such a rejection. Maybe she was not playing protector, but merely protecting herself and maybe that was not such a bad thing.

Luckily she doesn't have to answer or explain because Jesse was there to interrupt from the pool floor below.

"Beeeee-CAAAAW! Benji and I are going for milkshakes and fries. Want to come? It's on me."

She didn't have to think twice before replying, not caring about all the people staring. "When do I ever pass up free food, man."

Then she was sliding down the side of the pool, not caring she would just have to climb back up to the top again to leave. Her only concern being getting away from Chloe and the questions she was asking. She goes into a forward roll at the end to make sure she doesn't break anything. Jesse was there when she sits up with a friendly smile and a helping hand to pull her up into a standing position. It feels like she was in high school again, breaking into yet another abandoned building, Jesse loyally at her side. The site of yet another rave. Her newer memories drowning out the older ones. They all then leave, buzzing with excitement from the riff-off and promise of milkshakes. Beca tries to ignore the gnawing guilt in the bottom of her stomach as she walks further away from a teary eyed Chloe. She doesn't sleep well that night.

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A/N: I'm not completely happy with some of the more serious dialogue in this chapter, but I've stared at it for a while and I don't think it will get any better. Oh well! Now that I have messed up my posting schedule, have no fear! I'll try and slowly fix it by posting next Wednesday, unless something big happens in my life. (Which doesn't seem likely.) See you all next week!