Wanring: Noncon - not graphic, not specific.

Monday

"Remember, help is a human right, not a privilege. Don't hesitate out of fear of ridicule. This behavior, as we've seen from history, can end up being catastrophic. It is never too late to ask for help." Mr. Matthews finished his lecture just in the nick of time. The bell rang moments later and the class stood collectively.

Another day down!

"I have to change for dance practice and then stop in the art room. You have cheerleading practice, right?" Maya looked at her best friend who nodded happily.

"Yep, competition is next month. I'm getting the hang of the new routine, I think. Watch..." Riley proceeded to show Maya a few arm movements and in the process hit her hand on the wall of lockers next to them.

"Ouch!"

"Riley!" Maya dodged her flailing arm and chuckled, a knowing look of amusement on her face. "I can't believe they let you compete..." Riley shook out her hand, releiving the pain slightly.

"Oh, no, they don't. I'm on standby. But they're my friends and it's fun! Plus it'll look nice on my college applications. Cheerleading and debate team are my only extra curriculars."

"Don't forget about your notorious week long presidential position of the Rainbow Pony Club," Farkle chimed in, smirking slightly.

"Yeah, too bad we needed at least five people to officially call it a club," Riley said sadly.

Maya snorted and mumbled, "Bad for you, lucky for everyone else..."

The three friends stopped at their lockers and dropped off their history supplies, regrouping what they needed for homework and packing it in their bags.

"What's in the art classroom?" Riley asked, picking up where Maya left off.

"Mr. Roe has my college recommendation letters ready."

"Recommendation letters, dance team... you're really taking college seriously. I'm so excited, we're going to get into the same school and be roommates! Yay!"

"Whoa, whoa, calm down Riles. How about we take it one day at a time? Like today, after practice we can walk home together today."

"Perfect, meet by the gym lockers?"

"Yep, see you later!" Maya gave a small wave, slung her backpack onto her shoulder, and turned the corner towards the bathroom to change into her dance uniform. It would be easier to change now rather than rushing later with the locker room full of girls.

Wednesday

Maya was good at pretending. For as long as she remembered she had to pretend something. When she was younger, she had to pretend she wasn't sad. For her mom, she had to pretend she wasn't lonely.

The last two days proved to herself that she could pretend to be normal when she felt the opposite of normal. She proved that she could pretend she wasn't scared. She could still pretend after all of these years and she was good at it. She could talk, laugh, act confident... she could attend art class, she could hold a conversation with Mr. Roe without shaking. She could even still smile at his jokes to the class.

She was good at pretending her skin wasn't crawling. She could pretend she wasn't terrified. She could stifle the sharp intake of breath when someone stepped closer to her.

Maya could pretend to be fearless.

Thursday

Maya had NYU in her sights and all she could think about was how terrible of an idea it was to visit. When she initially boarded the train her mind was set on going to the university, but during the ride it had jumped to Josh. Visiting him had not been her original goal, but what if she saw him? He was busy with his own life; classes, parties, and probably girls. She looked down at her phone nervously and saw two missed calls from her mom and Shawn.

She felt horrible ignoring them but didn't know what else to do. She was scared. She had run out of their apartment without warning after listening to Shawn during the "family meeting".

Everything felt like a threat. She was jumpy and worried. She trusted Shawn, she loved Shawn, but while she listened to him at the family meeting his words were suddenly broken and uneven to her ears. It started to sound like Mr. Roe. So she panicked and ran out, and that's how she found herself on the subway heading towards NYU.

She thought of going to the Matthew house but quickly decided against it. Riley would be scared and would panic. The last thing Maya wanted to do was feel more panicked than she already did. She wanted to run away, clear her head. She wasn't ready to dive into the fear and cry until she passed out. Maya wanted to think about her future, where she would be happy, and ignore the present. She was familiar with bad things happening. She knew how it went: she would hurt at first, but time was the only thing that truly fixed things. She would wait it out, push the fear away, and graduate so she could go to NYU.

NYU was the exit - the exit that she wanted to take to get her life on the right path. Although she would never admit it aloud she couldn't deny that Josh was a source of comfort to her and knowing he was there made her feel a little more secure. She hadn't texted him or had any intention to let him know she was there, but maybe it was a proximity thing - honestly, she didn't know. All she knew was that she needed to run and her instincts brought her to the university.

She wandered the campus aimlessly at first and at some point spotted a directional sign that said "Admissions". Instantly an idea came to her. Maybe she didn't need recommendation letters and contacts. She pushed open the door to the admissions office and nervously walked towards the front desk to wait for someone to help her.

"Hey there, do you have an appointment?" A young man, presumably a student worker, walked up to the reception desk from the back offices.

"Oh, no. I'm not a student here. I'm still in high school but want to apply. I had a question about the application. I'm interested in applying but the applications are a little expensive, especially since I'm applying to multiple school. Is there some kind of option for people who are... um... not really wealthy?" Maya wasn't one to ask for help, and her face turned a little red from embarrassment.

"Yeah, of course. There is a form you can fill out, an NANAC, which you can get from your guidance counselor. Fill out the form and send it to any college or university you'd like to apply to and a free application will be sent your way. You need to prove your financial hardship, so your legal guardian may have to help you out." The boy stood up and walked towards a large display of pamphlets and set 'Applying with Financial Assistance' in front of her.

She looked at the pamphlet and her heart jumped a little. She had options. Mr. Roe could make her life easier but she didn't need him to apply to schools. She might need the recommendation letter, since she didn't have many teachers encouraging her other than Mr. Matthews... but she didn't want to think about that right now.

"Thank you so much," she said with a breath of relief.

The boy looked at her curiously. "Give me just a second."

Maya nodded and starting flipping through the pamphlet. The process looked easy. She felt like she won the lottery. She wanted to shove this in Mr. Roe's face then shove him. The boy walked back and in his hand was a folder with large NYU letters adoring the front.

"I was able to snag this application for you. Try not to get me in trouble." He smiled and Maya's jaw dropped. Her eyes began to water, the stress of this week suddenly overwhelming her.

"Thank you so much." Maya held the folder close to her, not knowing what else to say.

"Hey, don't even worry about it. Good luck with the process, I'm sure you'll nail it." Maya nodded and turned to leave.

It had been so easy... Mr. Roe made it sound so complicated. This just proved he was manipulating her and she felt stupid for not realizing it sooner. He was just like her father, another man who only wanted something from her.

She was outside in the corridor now and the sun was beginning to set. She felt her confidence creeping back up. She could figure this out on her own: she got the application alone, and everything else could be sorted out in the same way.

"Maya?"

Crap. Her shoulders tensed and she pretended not to hear him. Maybe if I ignore him he won't...

"Maya." His hand softly wrapped around her wrist and he tugged gently to turn her around. A delightful shiver ran up her arm and followed the course down her spine. Josh.

"Hey," she said lightly, and turned to face him. He looked just as good as always. Maya's eyes studied his face and warmth filled her.

"What's up? What are you doing here?" He looked surprised but not unhappy.

"Just visiting the campus. I got an application." She lifted the folder to show him proudly. "But I'm done now and was leaving. I'm sure you have classes too, so I'll see ya later." She attempted to walk away but, of course, it wasn't that easy.

"Wait..." he looked confused and followed beside her as she started to walk away. "Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

"It was out of the blue, last minute," she said slowly. It wasn't a lie, but she felt the anxiety beginning to bubble up inside of her. She wanted to leave. She didn't feel right talking to him like this, telling half-truths. She didn't feel like herself and she didn't want Josh to see her like this.

"Right, that's believable," he said sarcastically with raised brows. "I know the real Maya Hart would never show up to NYU and not tell me. So, what's going on?" He took a stepped in front of her, forcing her to stop walking, and placed one hand on each of her shoulders so he could look at her straight on. Those feelings Riley described about kissing Lucas suddenly became Maya's reality. I just can't stop staring at his lips and I'm somehow paying attention to every part of him and then... Riley's voice echoed in her mind.

Maya's heart was pounding. Her arms were tingling where Josh's hands were on her. She looked at his lips and her brain went into auto pilot. She wanted to replace what happened on Monday. She wanted to erase it. She wanted a first kiss like Riley's, like Farkle's, like anyone else.

She stepped forward and they were suddenly standing closer than they ever had. She placed her hands on his chest, palms flat, and stared into his eyes boldly. "Will you kiss me?"

"Wha-Maya!" His eyes widened and he took a step backwards. She took one forward, not looking away from him, searching for affirmation. Josh held her gaze and then blinked, looking away with a blush. "Maya we can't... not like this..."

Her breath caught in her throat and the panic began to rise from her chest, from all the anxiety she was feeling from the day. "Josh, I want to-Josh..." And then her eyes were welling up with tears and there no time to stop it.

"Maya," he said gently but didn't step back again. Instead he pulled her in for a hug and let her bury her face into his chest. His eyebrows narrowed. He had never seen Maya like this. Her shoulders shook as she began to cry into his shirt.

"Hey, you're okay," he said quietly into her hair as he rested his head on hers. He felt her shake her head and she moved her hands between them to wipe the tears off of her face, and they were separated. Josh felt a tinge of loss as they parted.

Maya turned away from him, attempting to hide her tears. She tried to catch her breath and breathed deeply to calm herself.

"Are you alright?" he asked. Maya shook her head 'no' again. He sighed and looked around. Luckily classes already started and the corridor was relatively empty.

"Let's sit down." He put his arm around her shoulder and led her to a small alcove and sat them on one of the benches.

Maya sniffled. "This is humiliating. I'm having a bad week."

"Want to tell me about it? You came all the way here, after all."

Maya made a small noise of protest. "I wasn't even going to tell you I was here. I got the application and want to leave."

"You're not leaving." He spoke severely. "What is going on."

"I'm figuring it out."

Josh didn't believe her for a second. "Why did you come here?"

"I don't know. I panicked and this was the second place I thought to come after Riley's, but I decided that going to her was a bad idea." She paused and inhaled deeply. "Shawn asked if he could adopt me."

"That's great!" Josh said enthusiastically. He smiled genuinely and Maya couldn't help but turn up the corner of her lips too. "Shawn is a great guy. And I can see it: 'Maya Hunter'."

Maya didn't respond. It was great. She thought it was amazing that Shawn wanted her as a daughter.

Her heart sank and her ghost of a smile fell. There was someone else who wanted her too. A shudder ran through her body.

"What's wrong?" Josh noticed her change of demeanor and lost some enthusiasm.

"I'm confused. Shawn is Shawn, and I know that, I do, and I know that he is genuine about how much he cares about. But... what if he wants something from me, too?" She felt guilty voicing her worry. Shawn had been a great father figure since she met him, and he never asked her for anything except respect and acceptance. But that's what she had thought about other people... and look where that got her.

An image of Mr. Roe leaning towards her and the vivid memory of his hands on her made all rational thoughts disappear. She had trusted him, too. He had become one of her favorites teachers - a father figure of sorts.

"What do you mean, wants something from you? From where I'm sitting it looks like he wants you to be his family, officially."

Maya looked away, frustrated. "I know that... or, I knew that. But that's what always happens to me. That's what they all say to me."

"Who?"

"Men," she said quickly without even thinking.

"I hope you don't think that about me, and if you start to I hope you talk to me about it." Josh grabbed her hand and laced his fingers with hers. She held on tight.

"Not you," she said quietly. "Would I still be sitting here if I meant you?"

He smiled and squeezed her hand. But the smile faded slowly as he considered her words and what happened in the last few minutes.

"Who wants something from you?"

"I don't-," her breathing increased. "I guess Shawn and what he said... it reminds me of when my dad said he wanted partial custody. He didn't want to take care of me for real, he just wanted to avoid the child support payment."

There was a long pause. "Shawn isn't like that. What could he gain, other than a daughter, by adopting you?"

"He's not the problem. He's not why I'm confused." Maya felt the shaking begin in her chest. It was how it began when she was listening to Shawn talk earlier about adopting her. "My memory keeps overlapping the things they say to me, its like two songs playing at once and I don't know who is saying which words. I want to believe Shawn but I've heard it all before.

"Hey, hey... its okay," Josh squeezed their clasped hands, trying to reassure her. She started shaking and he could faintly hear her teeth clicking together.

"Why would he do that to me? I trusted him too," she said severely, and covered her face again with her free hand. She was shaking her head repeatedly in a "no" motion, and Josh could only watch as she got lost in her own memories.

"I don't know how a man could leave his daughter, b-,"

"No! No. Not my dad, and not Shawn. See, there are so many people who have fucked me over you can't even keep them straight!" She let out a dry laugh. Her eyes were red from holding back tears. Josh was at a complete loss for words.

"My heart is racing." She held onto Josh's hand tight. She couldn't keep it in any longer. She couldn't live like this.

"I'm sorry," she said in a small voice.

"You don't have to apologize, I just want you to be okay."

"I was wearing a leotard for dance and he said he couldn't help it. The first time it was a mistake. But then today it-it was my fault. I'm so stupid."

Josh's eyes narrowed and a wave of confusion shot through him. "What was a mistake? Who?"

She wasn't looking at him but her body language was begging him to not let go of the hand he was holding. He hadn't even consider it.

"Kissing me," Maya mumbled.

Josh was so surprised by how the conversation turned he responded before thinking. "Shawn kissed you?!"

"NO!" Maya recoiled as if someone hit her. "No! He would never!"

A thousand thoughts began racing through Josh's mind. A wave of unwarranted jealousy was the first feeling to hit him. Imagining Maya kissing someone else was... unpleasant. But that image was quickly overtaken by a multitude of other questions.

"Who kissed you? What does it have to do with Shawn or your dad?" He tried to subdue his feelings as he held onto the hand of the girl he knew would be perfect for him... one day.

"They say the same things and they all just use me," she said helplessly. Five days ago Maya believed that Shawn would never hurt or scare her. Now she was so confused and uncertain because of Mr. Roe. What he had done was causing her to second guess everyone including herself.

"Who?" Josh pressed, realizing the nature of the conversation but not quite connecting the dots.

"My dad, Shawn, my-," she choked on the word, "-people. Men."

"Stop." He wasn't sure if he was telling Maya or himself but either way they both needed to calm down. "It sounds like someone kissed your, or-or did something you didn't want. I can tell you are scared, or afraid to tell me, but I need you to please tell me what happened."

Maya nodded and Josh could feel her shaking against his leg. He didn't want to make her any more uncomfortable by panicking but he was trying to stay calm for himself. He very badly wanted her to speak but was dreading whatever was about to come out of her mouth.

"Mr. Roe, my art teacher." Josh let let out a long breath and reminded himself that Maya was holding his hand.

"He kissed you?" Maya nodded.

It was messed up and more than anyone should have to deal with; more than Maya deserved. He connected the dots in his head: art was her favorite subject, this teacher must have been a mentor to her. It was like her father, Shawn, or Cory... another man she trusted had deceived her in a terrible way.

"What do I do?" she said, her shoulder sinking, as if not expecting an answer.

"I think I need to call your mom and Shawn." She didn't object.

"How about we go to a cafe? Its about a block away." Josh suggested after he ended the call with Shawn. After explaining that Maya was safe but that there was a minor emergency Shawn and Katy didn't hesitate to agree to make the drive to pick Maya up. They were about half an hour drive away.

Maya nodded and stood up. She seemed calmer after telling him what happened. "I'm sorry if you missed your class because of me."

"Nah, it's cool. It was just a study session with some classmates. I texted them just now and let them know I'd e-mail them my notes later." Josh was trying his best to be normal. His mind was racing, but he was trying to stay calm on the surface.

"Do you like being out of high school? Is it hard?" Maya asked, looking around as they walked. She had never actually visited a university before, aside from the one time her and Riley crashed Josh's "party" a few years prior.

"It depends on your major. Some of it is easier, some of it is harder. I have a lot more spare time but that means I need to have some self discipline. I have to schedule study times for myself. It's cool, I'm glad I'm here."

"I really hope I get in," Maya admitted. "I try not get my hopes up but when it comes to NYU... I'm getting pretty invested in the idea. It's my top choice."

"I hope you get in too," Josh said honestly and Maya couldn't hold back the smirk.

"One day," she said with a grin. Josh just smiled, unwilling to say it aloud, but the silent agreement was understood.

Josh held the door open for her and suggested she have an herbal white tea since it was caffeine free and she was already on edge. She nodded in agreement and found a booth in the far corner of the cafe. There weren't many patrons and she immediately loved the low-key vibe. It reminded her of Topaga's but a little less colorful.

When Josh got back he had two mugs of steaming tea and placed one in front of Maya. He sat down in the booth beside her instead of across. She inhaled deeply and let the steam and scent of the tea fill her senses. She was glad Josh had suggested this.

They sat in silence for a few minutes and enjoyed each other's company until Josh broke the ice and attempted to resume the conversation from earlier.

"Will you tell me what happened?" Josh asked carefully. It was obvious Maya was having trouble opening up to anyone about this. She had traveled more than an hour by train to NYU instead of going to Riley's house. He didn't want to let her down, he wanted to ensure she didn't feel alone.

Maya sighed but nodded slowly, looking down at her tea, playing with the string of the tea bag to keep her hands occupied.

"He is-was-one of my favorite teachers. He wrote me a college recommendation letter. When I went to his classroom before dance practice on Monday I was wearing this stupid sparkly leotard with tights. I don't know why I walked around looking like that. He even said its part of the reason-,"

"No," Josh interrupted kindly. "It wasn't you, your behavior, or your dance uniform. He shouldn't be treating a student like that, no matter what you're wearing. Even here it's inappropriate for things to happen between a student and teacher, and we're all over 18. He took advantage of you. He's in a position of power and authority."

Maya contemplated that for a moment before asking carefully, "Is that how you feel about us?"

"Of course not. Just because I'm older doesn't mean I'm in a position over you. I'm here for you if you need me, obviously, but its mutual: you're here for me too." Maya felt reassured by the words and gave Josh a small smile to show it. But her face fell as soon as she began to sort her thoughts to retell what happened.

"He started complimenting me and telling me what a good person I am. I was flattered. He's my teacher... I just thought he liked my artwork and was proud of what I can do. The next thing I know he's kissing me and I just froze. I didn't know what to do... I let it happened, I didn't even try to stop him. He must have thought I liked it but I didn't. I ended up running out when he stopped. I didn't even get the recommendation letters.

"Then today in art class and he asked me to stay after. He said it in front of everyone, I couldn't say no. I tried to shove him away this time and he didn't like that. He started holding me down and- I don't know, I didn't know what to do other than try to push him off and it wasn't working so I just froze again." She was humiliated. Retelling it was almost worse than living it, because she had to admit that she allowed it to happen to her not once but twice.

"I've never been kissed and now I'll always remember my first one being that." She spoke in a weak voice and hung her head, covering her face in shame.

"No again." Josh gently grabbed her hands and removed them from her face, holding them on top of the table. "That was not your first kiss. That was nothing. One day someone is gong to be in front of you - someone you want there - and that will be your first kiss." He never broke eye contact. Her eyes shined with unshed tears and when she forced herself to nod they began to fall. He wanted to reach up and wipe them away but his brain was telling him that now was not the time.

"Is that everything he did?" He was terrified to hear the answer.

Maya looked completely unsettled. "He... The whole thing didn't last more than five minutes." Her face was white and Josh didn't press the issue. If she wanted him to know she would tell him, otherwise she could tell the police.

He inhaled deeply, the air in his throat catching slightly. What happened to her was disturbing and he was feeling sick to his stomach. He took a sip of his own tea, hoping it would calm him.

"He said a lot of nice things. I guess that's why I panicked when Shawn started telling me what a great daughter I would be. It sounded similar. I was hearing two different voices in my head and I had to leave. I feel crazy." She looked terrified and Josh didn't blame her. He squeezed her hand gently, hoping it would give her some peace.

"Mr-My teacher told me that college applications were almost $100 each and that he could get me art school ones for free. He told me it would be impossible to get them on my own, that I wouldn't be able to do it without his help." She lifted the envelope with her NYU application to show Josh. "He was wrong."

Josh felt his heart lift a little. There she was. Despite the tears and fear, he knew Maya was a fighter and he was happy to see that she was still fighting now. He let go of her hand and slung an arm around her shoulders, pulling her towards him.

Josh's phone began to ring and by the time he was hanging up Maya heard the cafe door open and the click of her mom's heels approaching. Josh tugged Maya's hand and they stood up together to greet the adults.

"My baby, hey," her mom said worriedly as she practically ran to her daughter and wrapped her arms around her. Maya didn't hesitate to cling to her mom. She felt young in that moment, but also safe.

"What's the emergency, what's going on?" Shawn looked at Josh for answers and he turned to Maya who was buried in her moms shoulder. Josh knew that he had to take the reigns on this one, at least at first.

"Maybe we should sit down." Josh gestured to the table and each of the took a seat at the booth, Josh and Shawn at cross from the ladies. Maya scooted closer to her mom and held her hand.

"Maya came here to get an application after one of her teaches told her that without him she wouldn't be able to get into college or afford the applications." He decided to start small. This also would show that her teacher was being manipulative.

"That's ridiculous, who told you that Maya? You know that we're both here for you and supportive of your decision for college, whether or not you want to go. Spending money on applications is a necessity. We can make it work." Shawn sounded so sure and passionate that Maya felt guilty immediately. Why was her brain mixing up Shawn and her teacher? Why couldn't she trust him to be exactly what he said he'd be: a good father? She felt panic at the thought of trusting him and the guilt crashed down alongside it. She felt her eyes beginning to water, why was this happening to her? Why did this happen to her over and over again?

Josh didn't understand everything, but he did realize that Maya was not completely comfortable with Shawn right now. For the sake of his uncle, someone he loved, and for Maya, he felt the need to be the bridge of this conversation.

"That's not everything." Josh ran his hands through his hair, distressed. When he woke up this morning he never thought he'd be dealing with something like this. But he'd be damned if he was going to let Maya deal with it alone.

"Oh, okay," Shawn said evenly, ready to hear out any of Maya's concerns. Maya could feel the openness he was offering and the only word to describe how she was feeling was awful. Guilty and awful. Losing trust in Shawn because of a monster?

"I'm so, so sorry," Maya spoke quietly and Shawn didn't even budge. He didn't look mad, or hurt. In fact, he looked like he understood completely. But he didn't and Maya was getting overwhelmed at that important detail.

"Maya if you don't want me to adopt you or if you want to wait I am not upset."

"No! No, I do!" she objected quickly but her face said something different. Maya let out a tiny noise of distress and put her palm up to her head, wishing she could will the fear out of her. You're smart, passionate, beautiful- she shivered involuntarily.

"It's not your fault, it's me, I'm messed up. I'm being awful. I'm awful," she said, because she couldn't say what was actually happening. She couldn't vocalize that she was mixing up Shawn with a monster because she didn't want him to hate her. She knew he was a good man. She knew but she was still terrified.

"Maya you're not messed up," Josh said sternly. "Maya, it's alright." He felt frustrated and he could see that Maya was about to start shaking again so he decided to break the news quickly.

"Maya's scared of you right now Shawn, and it's not your fault at all. Something happened."

"What happened?" Katy said, on high alert.

"Her teacher assaulted her," Josh said quickly, but in a low voice. Katy gasped.

"What!" Shawn's voice was loud. Maya's head snapped up and she looked around the cafe, a few people looked over.

"Please don't yell, please don't hate me," she said quickly, her eyes wide and worried. "I'm sorry!"

Shawn looked appalled, Katy was shocked silent, and Josh felt stuck in the middle. "Don't-what!" Shawn repeated, in a quieter voice, but he sounded furious. He looked murderous.

"Who did this, Maya?" Katy said tearfully. "Baby who did this?"

"Mr. Roe, her art teacher," Josh answered with a bitter tone.

"This is fucked up. We're leaving right now! We're going to the police station and we're getting him fired. Maya are you hurt? You didn't do anything wrong, Maya." His voice changed from urgent to calm as his thoughts bounced from hurting the man who did this to caring about Maya.

"Shawn is right, baby. We're going to the police." Katy wrapped and arm around Maya and started to stand, dragging Maya along with her. Josh followed their lead, knowing it wasn't his place to object. Maya looked a little overwhelmed but allowed her mom to pull her forward. She didn't know what to do and maybe listening to them was finally the direction she needed.

They arrived at the car and Maya was almost surprised that the passenger door didn't fall off after Shawn slammed it shut. Katy insisted on driving, believing she was more calm at the moment. Josh walked Maya to her car door and accepted her hug before she climbed into the backseat.

"Thank you." Maya stared at him and Josh understood the sincerity.

"Text me," he said nicely. "Anytime you need me, I'm here."

"Okay, I will." And she meant it.

A/N: I have severe writers block but was struck with inspiration to write this. I have the full story in my head but I'm doubtful I'll ever write it completely. I hope you enjoyed. This will remain marked as completed whether I update or not.