The Twisted Family Tree
Chapter 3: A Lie a Day Keeps the Pirates Away
On a small boat in East Blue,
Moments after being driven out of Orange Town by the population.
Luffy was still grinning from seeing the people of Orange Town chasing them out for hurting their mayor.
"It's really not that funny!" Nami's exasperation was palpable.
Zoro snorted at her fury but didn't comment, instead choosing to return to sleep - which he had been doing since the group had left. He was napping on their original ship with his swords while Luffy sat at the front of it. Nami and Naruto were on the other boat; the orange-haired girl's one. The only blonde of the group was watching this interaction silently from the edge of the boast, his hand hung out on the side trailing through the water.
"Sorry Nami," Luffy smiled cheekily, "I hope I haven't upset my new navigator too much!" The comment was accentuated by a a stamp of his feet on the boat's floor.
"It's only temporary! As soon as this isn't beneficial and you make me lose money, I'm out." She hastily interjected. Luffy nodded emphatically, muttering 'sure' under his breath several times. Naruto realised immediately that there was no hope of Nami escaping the crew now. As soon as she decided to follow them out of Orange Town she'd signed her soul to the straw-hat devil. "Anyway, where are we going now?"
"Hmm," Zoro's eyes opened in interest as their captain considered Nami's question, "Dunno." The straw-hat wearers reply earned another laugh out of Zoro and a small smile out of Naruto as well. Nami was anything but amused.
"Seriously? Who even are you? How does this crew function?" As soon as she finished speaking however, she recognised that three people couldn't possibly be called a crew anyway.
"It doesn't." Zoro muttered under his breath before turning to the side to get in a more comfortable position to sleep. If Luffy was upset by either's words he didn't show it, instead smiling brightly at both of them.
"Well if you really do want to sail the Grand Line you'll at least need a ship." Nami explained calmly. Naruto's head jutted up in curiosity as she spoke.
"Grand Line?" Naruto interjected. Nami looked at him in confusion; she'd assumed everyone knew of Luffy's plans.
Luffy, thankfully, entered the conversation, "Yeah! To become the Pirate King I gotta find One Piece and to do that I gotta go to the Grand Line. Apparently it's super cool!" Stars manifested in the teen's eyes as he finished.
"Wait, you mean you took a kid against his will to become a pirate and didn't even tell him where you were heading?" The orange-haired girl rubbed her forehead anxiously, "Is it bad I'm starting to not be surprised?" She aimed the question at herself so no one answered. "Naruto, do you want to go to the Grand Line?"
The boy shrugged, "I don't mind." As if the entire concept of the dangerous ocean meant nothing to him.
"Do you understand how horrible that place is?" She added, not sure if the boy actually comprehended what she was saying.
"I've been there before." The blonde spoke carefully and didn't add anything to explain his words.
"O-Oh..." Nami didn't know how to respond to that.
"Really!? What's it like? Is it cool?" Within seconds Luffy was in Naruto's face, holding the boy's shoulders, "Is it fun?" Naruto grimaced at the questions and Zoro, who had opened his eyes as soon as the Grand Line had been mentioned, noticed the expression. For the swordsman it was yet another indication that Naruto wasn't all he seemed.
"No," Naruto whispered, "No it wasn't."
Even Luffy, as socially inept as he was, realised he'd ventured into unpleasant territory for the boy and so stopped his questioning immediately, blinking slowly at the pained visage of Naruto.
The teen rested his hand on Naruto's head, "Don't worry," He ruffled his hair, "We'll protect you. We'll protect each other. We're nakama now." He spoke with such resolution and confidence that for a second the blonde actually believed him.
There was a brief period of silence.
"Zoro?" Luffy asked.
The swordsman kept his eyes closed as he answered, "What?"
"I'm hungry~."
This time it was Naruto who laughed.
Eventually the mismatched group found themselves approaching land; it was a small island and they could make out a quaint cliff-side entry into the forests. For all intents and purposes it looked inhabited but was obviously not densely populated. They'd likely encounter a small village of some kind if anything. As soon as the boat was within stepping distance of the beach Luffy jumped out enthusiastically.
"Yosh! Land!" His happiness was infectious and when the other three also found themselves beside him on the beach they too felt a twinge of relief at the feeling of hard ground beneath their feet.
"So what now?" Nami directed her question at everyone.
"Food." Luffy stated in a matter-of-fact tone, as if it he shouldn't even have to voice it. Just as the group was about to head up the entryway however, they were interrupted by the appearance of dozens of pirate flag hanging in the treeline of the forest. As suddenly as they appeared a man stood from the shrubbery; he was wearing a bandana on his long black hair and overalls hung off his frame. A bag of some sort was hanging from his shoulders and a white fabric was tied around his waist.
"Stop right there, pirates!" He spoke confidently but his entire body was shaking, "Syrup Village is under the protection of the great Usopp Pirates - I have 80 million followers surrounding you. Turn back now!" Naruto was sure if he was closer he'd be able to hear the man's teeth clattering from fear. Nami stopped herself from laughing out loud; what kind of fool fell for such an obvious lie?
"80 million!? S-S-SUGOI~!" Luffy shouted in absolute amazement.
A fist descended on the back of his head, "He's lying you idiot! The guy's practically shaking in fear - he probably only has a handful of people-"
"Three," Naruto voiced, "He has three people with him." As soon as the blonde spoke three voices erupted in squeals of fear.
"He's found us!" A very young voice could be heard, acting as if it had somehow been difficult to see the small beds of hair sticking out of the bushes.
"What should we do Captain? They've seen through our trick." Another questioned, his tone that of worry.
"Waaah! I've been caught!" The man screamed, holding his face.
Luffy burst into laughter, "Hahaha! You're so funny."
"Could you get the kids to come out already, they're annoying me." Zoro spoke up for the first time since landing. Immediately rustling could be heard in the bushes before three small figures dashed out going the completely opposite way from the swordsman.
"Ruuuuuun! We have to escape and tell the town!" The three boy's were disappearing from the horizon.
"H-Hey! Don't abandon me..." Usopp muttered in despair as he saw his supposed underlings leave. At this Luffy only laughed louder while Nami gave out a little giggle.
"Don't worry," The girl explained, "We're only here to try find a ship." She tried to calm the man's nerves.
"And food." Luffy chipped in quickly. Usopp's head whipped over to stare at him before looking over to Zoro.
The swordsman shrugged, "Sake." Usopp turned his head to Naruto, expecting to hear another request - which at the current time he was considering may actually be a list of demands.
"Uh, what they said...?" The blonde said absently. A fist immediately crashed into his head.
"You're too young to drink!" Nami shrieked.
"Itai~" The boy rubbed his head gingerly. Luffy laughed again.
"So you're looking for a ship and companions?" Usopp asked the group. They had moved from the beach into the village itself and found themselves in a small restaurant of some sort. Luffy and Zoro were enjoying their respective guilty pleasures while Naruto was spinning several leaves in his hand for amusement. Nami, at least, had the decency to be attentive to the man who had led them into the building.
"Yep!" Luffy confirmed in between bites.
"Hmm, I might know where you could find a ship..." Usopp hinted carefully, an air of mystery around him.
Luffy immediately leaned forward in excitement, "Really!? Where? How?" Nami quickly pulled him back into his seat with a loud huff of irritation.
"Well there's a mansion on this island and the girl who lives there is very rich," He explained uneasily, "But she's also very sick and miserable so it might be hard to get her to help." His last words didn't seem to have any effect on the straw-hat wearer though, who had not stopped grinning since he mentioned the mansion.
"Eh?" Nami's was aghast, as if the very idea of being sad while rich was foreign to her, "Why?"
And so Usopp went on to explain the tale of Kaya and the death of her parents.
"That is sad." Nami conceded, "Oh well, we don't have to get a ship on this island - we'll just leave."
"Not without lots of meat!" Luffy interrupted.
"And sake." Zoro pipped in as he took a large swig from his bottle.
Nami nodded slowly, "I guess we're not in a hurry."
Just as she spoke the group was interrupted by three voices shouting loudly.
"The Usopp Pirates are..." The kids paused as they took in the sight of their supposed enemy eating calmly, "... here."
"Who're they?" Nami asked.
"Dunno." Luffy shrugged his shoulders before returning to eating.
Naruto, who had been enjoying the view outside the window and playing with his powers until now, explained absently, "It's the same three from the beach." No one questioned how he knew this but Zoro once again narrowed his eyes in suspicion.
"Where's our captain?" They demanded angrily.
"Ah, that was some great meat." Luffy ignored the three and patted his stomach in contentment. The three children were horrified by this action and began to stutter in fear.
"Y-You don't think they a-a-"
"Ate him." Zoro's face turned dark and evil as he spoke, his voice cold.
"AHHH!" The boys screamed collectively as one before falling to the floor, their legs giving way through terror. Zoro immediately started barking in laughter at the sight while Nami and Naruto laughed mildly at the scene. Luffy just stared on in confusion, not entirely understanding what was going on.
When the three regained their sense they quickly realised they'd been tricked and Zoro had only been joking. With this came the understanding of where their captain most likely actually was.
"It's that time again." The chimed as one.
"That time...?" Nami prompted.
Usopp was midway through telling Kaya about a thrillng adventure involving a giant goldfish when he was rudely interrupted by the sound of countless bodies crashing into the floor. Turning around to face the direction of the sound, he found himself face to face with the three supposed members of the Usopp Pirates as well as the four actual pirates from before.
"What're you all doing here?" He asked gruffly, irritated that he'd been interrupted mid-lie.
"We brought this guy here becau-
"So you're the ojousama!" Luffy interrupted the boy - Piiman - and walked confidently over to the window that Kaya still had her head sticking out from.
"Who's that?" Kaya asked uncertainly. It was obvious she was referring to Luffy; the teen had already established himself as the center of attention through their entrance.
Usopp, trying to restore order, stated, "These guys are big admirers of me, you see. They're new members of the Usopp Pirates-" He was stopped mid-tirade by Luffy.
"No, that's not true." The straw-hat wearer calmly interjected. "We're actually here to ask a favor!" At this his smile widened.
Kaya frowned in confusion, "A favour from me?" It was clear she wasn't used to the idea of people wanting her help.
"We need a ship." Nami took pity on her and explained why they were here in simple terms, understanding Luffy might be difficult to deal with for someone just meeting him.
"Yeah, a big one with - with! - sails and-"
This time Luffy was interrupted, "What do you people think you're doing? You're intruding on private property!" A cold voice cut through the air. A man wearing an expensive suit, glasses framing his face, was striding toward them confidently.
"Klahadore..." Kaya muttered uncertainly, not liking the hostility in the air.
"You can't just barge in like this... Please, get out." He sneered.
"But," Luffy whined, "My ship."
"Absolutely not!" Klahadore denied. Zoro snorted at the man's display of arrogance, clearly not thinking much of what seemed to be a butler on a power-trip. Naruto and Nami both simply frowned at the display but remained silent. When the man noticed Usopp an angry look passed over his face, "You're that Usopp right? The villagers often tell me about you..."
The slingshot-user smirked at this, "Why thank you, I didn't know tales of the great Captain Usopp had alrea-"
"You're the son of a filthy pirate right?" Klahadore interrupted calmly.
"What!?" Usopp's face darkened with fury.
Naruto shifted over slightly to Luffy and spoke quietly enough so that only the captain, Nami and Zoro could hear, "That man - he isn't right... He's," Naruto paused, as if trying to find the right words, "He feels dark. Evil." Luffy blinked at his words, taking them in, but didn't make any outward reaction to them. Nami simply narrowed her eyes and studied the servant for herself. Zoro made a disatisfied clicking sound with his tongue before moving slowly toward Usopp, clearly intending to defuse the situation.
"I guess it's no surprise then that you're the same... you should have just lied about your dirty blood and said he was a merchant. Anything else would have been better." Klahador continued calmly, attacking Usopp's character without hesitation.
Usopp, having lost his patience, struck him. Or he would have had he not been held back by Zoro. When the teen turned his furious eyes toward Zoro in reaction to being prevented from dishing out some punishment, the swordsman shook his head.
"He's not worth it." He stated simply.
At this Usopp's brow furrowed and he lowered his face, shadows covering his eyes. When he looked back up he was remarkably more calm.
"Fine," The teen bit out, "I'll leave!" He swiveled in the direction of the exit with a great huff, a look of consternation on his face.
Kaya quickly demanded, "Klahadore! That was cruel - If you're going to be so," Her voice grew in a rare display of confidence, "So unfair then I don't want you around when Usopp visits!" As soon as she finished Kaya seemed to realise her own actions and hunched her shoulders in nervousness. Klahadore, who had been silent throughout the girl's admonishment of him, simply sighed in sadness.
"I understand Ojousama." He bowed in apology, "I just don't want you to get hurt, you understand..." At this he turned toward three young children and Luffy's group, "I'm sorry for my harsh words but I must ask that you leave."
"It's ok," Luffy nodded in grave severity, "I understand." His tone was pompous - an attempt to imitate his idea of a lord or lady.
"There's nothing you can do to sound like a gentleman." Zoro muttered, amused by his captain's antics. Nami, seeing an opportunity to leave without a hassle, turned to the remaining people.
"Come on, let's go." When the three kids showed no sign of leaving she growled angrily, "I said, let's go." Her voice had a sickly sweet tone and the three, suddenly fearing for their lives, bolted out of the area in seconds. Luffy meanwhile allowed himself to be dragged out of the courtyard by Zoro while Naruto followed in a slow walk.
Several minutes later Naruto found himself with Nami, Zoro and two of the kids sitting at a roadside fence. Zoro and the kids were leaning on the fence while Nami sat on the railing and Naruto leaned on a nearby tree. They were all deep in thought, considering the actions of Usopp and the Butler, Klahadore, and how close it had come to blows.
To Naruto the entire situation had been incredibly uncomfortable; his whole body had shook in reaction to the dark intentions rolling off of the butler and when Usopp had gotten furious due to the remarks about his father the blonde had found himself assaulted by a combination of despair, pride and anger all at once. He was thankful that Zoro had stopped a fight from breaking out.
"Where's Luffy?" Nami asked suddenly, breaking the silence.
Zoro shrugged, "Maybe he went after Usopp?" He didn't sound particularly worried.
"If he's looking for the captain then they'd be at that place." Ninjiin deduced.
"Yeah, the captain always goes to the shoreline when he's upset." Piiman added enthusiastically, happy to be of help. Nami, noticing the absence of the other child, decided to speak up.
"Where's your other friend?" She probed in mild curiosity.
"Oh, you mean Tamanegi?" Ninjiin confirmed, "He's probably over-reacting about something."
"WE'RE IN TROUBLE!" Tamanegi screamed from the road, running toward them rapidly in fear, "There's some weirdo who walks backwards coming!" He added, short of breath.
"Liar." Ninjiin and Piiman immediately countered in deadpan voices.
"No, no! Look!" At this Tamanegi pointed toward the way he came from and, to the surprise of the others, a man was walking backwards down the road.
When Zoro and Nami looked over the noticed that Naruto, who had been leaning on the tree, had disappeared, "Where'd Naruto go...?" Nami asked uneasily. Zoro didn't bother to answer, entirely uninterested in the disappearing act of both his captain and his crewmate.
As soon as the odd man was within hearing distance of the group he began to speak.
"Hey, who said I was a weirdo? I am not a weirdo, I'm just a simple hypnotist." He explained, as if hypnotists were a common thing to come across. At their skeptical looks the man decided to add, "Want a demonstration?"
What immediately followed was an amusing case of self-hypnotism as the three boys and the man - Jango - fell victim to the curious circular blade's hypnotic powers. When they came to the name continued into the town, giving them a light-hearted wave as they left.
The boys, still amazed by the actions of the man, suddenly realised the absence of the youngest pirate, "Hey, where's that blonde guy?" Ninjiin voiced for the group.
Nami and Zoro had no answer for them but were fortunately saved from admitting so when a bunch of leaves began kicking up in the tree that Naruto had been near. They swirled around the lowest branches before a form began to take shape. In seconds Naruto's face appeared upside down in the tree, created from what was previously simple leaves in a tree. Nami's mouth opened in surprised while one of the boy's, Tamanegi, shrieked in surprise and fear.
"Sorry," Naruto announced lightly from his upside-down position, "I was worried he might be an enemy." The boy explained. Zoro nodded in appreciation of the blonde's forethought, not at all shocked by the boy's sudden appearance from leaves.
"L-L-Leaf-man!" Tamanegi stuttered while Piiman and Ninjiin's mouthes opened and closed like fish.
Naruto tilted his head in confusion before suddenly realising they'd never seen his Devil Fruit powers before. He rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment and jumped down to the floor, "Ah, not exactly." He replied apprehensively.
"Your devil fruit let's you turn into leaves?" Nami demanded.
Naruto nodded slowly, "It's a logia. Transforming is hard though, I can only do it with a lot of concentration." Naruto blinked when he realised the three children were listening in before looking at them, "I ate a Devil Fruit." He added for their benefit.
"M-M-Monster!" Piiman bit out in both fear and awe. Naruto winced slightly at the word.
"Hardly," Zoro chuckled loudly, "He's just a brat like you." The blonde blinked at the swordsman, unsure to take what he said as a compliment or insult. He settled for being thankful that the man had steered the conversation away from his powers.
Ninjiin suddenly realised something as Zoro spoke, "Yeah, wait a minute. How can you be a pirate? You don't look much older than us..." He whined, as if affronted he wasn't allowed to be one while this stranger was.
"I dunno," Naruto truly didn't, "I didn't exactly choose this." Now that he thought about it, could he even consider himself a pirate? He wasn't really interested in One Piece nor in treasure at all. He didn't have any reason to be at sea beyond Luffy's demand that he be his nakama. He'd simply been going with the flow previously because Luffy had seemed a lot more fun than stealing for his brother... his brother.
Naruto shuddered internally, he hadn't even thought about Kurama since they'd left. For a moment he wondered what the other man thought about his absence before dismissing the thought; the redhead was probably relieved Naruto had disappeared.
"I guess," Naruto started slowly, "Because Luffy's fun?" He finished hesitantly, unsure about what he was saying. Zoro found himself silently agreeing - if there was one thing Luffy was good at it was making things interesting. This village was an example of that; they hadn't even been here a full day and the teen had already gotten them caught up in some sort of feud between a butler and pirate's son. Which reminded him...
"Oi gaki," Four heads turned to look at the swordsman, "Naruto." He clarified, the other three sighed in relief, glad the scary man wasn't talking to them, "What was with that servant at that girl's house anyway? You said he felt evil?" At the time Zoro didn't really put much thought into how Naruto phrased his suspicions, simply acting on instinct to stop Usopp from doing something he'd regret. Now though, the very idea that Naruto somehow sensed the other guy was disconcerting.
Naruto blinked, "I guess I could feel his emotions." The blonde stopped to consider how best to explain it, "I guess I've been able to do it for a while now. Only with bad stuff though," He grew unsure as he spoke, "I don't know why... you don't think there's something wrong with me do you?" The boy grew pale; he'd never even thought about how he always knew intrinsically if someone meant harm - it just came to him naturally.
"No," Zoro shrugged halfheartedly, "I guess I can relate to it but I only ever experience that sort of thing in battle." The swordsman didn't elaborate on what he meant and decided internally that he would definitely look into these supposed powers of premonition.
Nami decided to speak up as the conversation lulled to a stop, "That butler was a jerk anyway. It doesn't take magical powers to see it." She huffed, "How someone like him could ever get a job like that amazes me."
"His hands were worn..." Zoro's eyes narrowed as he spoke.
"Huh?" Nami paused in confusion.
"His hands, they were calloused - they had wounds that could only come from blades... as if he'd used them extensively before." Zoro suddenly recognised an uncomfortable feeling building deep in his stomach - there was something dangerous going on on this island.
"What kind of butler needs to use swords?" Tamanegi voiced.
Nami frowned, understanding now what Zoro was getting at, "No type of butler."
"Uh," Naruto interrupted their ramblings, "Someone's coming." At this everyone looked up to see a figure on the horizon coming from the direction the coast was. After a few seconds they could make out it was Usopp. When the teen passed them he didn't even spare a glance at them, madly dashing onward toward the village.
"Weird, didn't you say Luffy would be with him?" Nami questioned Zoro. The man nodded slowly in confirmation to her question but his mind was elsewhere; obviously something had forced his captain to abandon his pursuit of Usopp. He didn't like to imagine something that could accomplish that.
"Something must have happened at the coast..." Piiman muttered slowly.
"The coast," Zoro gazed at them with an intense expression on his face, "Which way is it?"
When they arrived at the beach they were greeted with a grim sight. Standing over the edge of the cliff they could make out Luffy's figure at the bottom. His head was stuck in the ground and he was deathly still. The three young boys screamed when they saw him, sure he was dead, while Zoro sighed in consternation. He descended the cliff-side without delay and Nami and Naruto followed closely behind. When they got to the bottom Zoro wasted no time in grabbing the straw-hat wearer by the leg and pulling him out of the ground with a harsh tug.
"Huurgh?" The teen moaned, wiping the sleep from his eyes, "Where am I?" One second he was dreaming about some delicious meat and the next he was rudely awoken.
"How could you be sleeping now?" Nami was appalled that the boy had fallen asleep with his head in the ground.
"Oh! That's easy to explain." Luffy stated calmly, "I was hypnotised." He announced in a deadpan voice. Nami felt anger bubble inside her as Zoro laughed at the teen's response and resisted the urge to strike the pirate across the head.
"Why?" Naruto prodded, keen to avoid the display of violence from the orange-haired girl.
Suddenly Luffy's face grew serious, "I have something to tell you about that butler."
Then came the tale of Klahadore - actually the pirate captain Kuro - and his nefarious plot to steal Kaya's riches for himself.
A/N: Short chapter but the next one will have a lot more action, obviously.
Ugh, the gathering of the crew is so painful to write but necessary.
There seems to be some confusion on Naruto's DF. To clarify; it is a Logia and, much like how Aokiji/Akainu can make bloody islands out of their powers Naruto can manipulate Nature outside of his body too (of course, he's not able to do what anywhere near what they can do yet). I added a little scene for clarification in the story.