The Other One

by I've got Rhythm in my Soul

Enter Mai Li, new student, non-conformist, social retard and all around doomed teen. Meeting Ichigo Kurosaki just made it worse...

12. The Whim of Providence

I liiiiiiiive! Er… Hi?

So happy to be back, (the very good reason why I haven't uploaded in forever is down at the bottom), and sooo many mistakes in the previous chapter. No matter how hard I tried either the site or, at the time, my crappy computer wouldn't let me save the corrections. So sorry about that too: Kon kissed Inoue on the hand (I was watching the anime at the time, it influenced me). Not the cheek and Karin is eleven years old, not ten (the twin's birthday was in May so we just passed it).

So yes, I've written this in a different alignment. I want to know what you think and whether or not you'd prefer this way from now on… I might like it. Not sure.

Last thing: I've pilfered something and put it in this chapter. It was something that I already had in mind since the first chapter. It's absolutely vital to the story and if any of you recognise what it is then please give me the benefit of the doubt. There are more notes at the end :)

Disclaimer: Don't own. Never shall. Not even the other stuff I've pulled from other sources.

Chapter 11:

The Whim of Providence and the Rising Dark

Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you. Friedrich Nietzsche.

The Science Department.

It wasn't a place built for the relative ease and unnecessary comfort of its employees. Housing some of the most precarious and prolific minds within the Soul Society it appeared more as a sanitary dungeon. It was an environment they preferred. Not to say it didn't have its reassurances; it was a home away from home for those eccentric few without whom the Seireitei would be unable to function as proficiently as it seems to.

In the darkest corner of its lowest substructure stood a door.

It was a quite nondescript colour of pale white; if it were possible that white could be pale. An affected area from the prints of curious fingers and wayward hands, of flaying bodies, and the colour from the residue of terrified reitsu emitted from captured souls. Nothing remotely remarkable about it at all. Designed like all the other doors in the building.

Inside however was a different story.

The dark beyond this partition was filled entirely with the soft glow brought about by numerous monitors. These displayed the output for specific, unrestricted geometric analysis. By the incessant play of lights alighting various buttons on the consoles before them it was safe to say that the imposing and expensive research equipment had been fiddled with, enhanced.

Sat imperiously in front of the largest VDU, at the forefront of them all was a man disinclined to heed the call of socialism. He was the only occupant in the room. His eerie, hitherto, queer presence certainly filled the absence of all else.

The apparent overhaul of his shoulders; layers of fabric giving his back the illusion of being much larger than it appeared to be was black against the luminescence of the screens. The peculiar shaped panama perched precariously on his head cast a sinister atmosphere to the man's physique. His aesthetic sense mirrored his scientific attitude: his entire form, from foot to head was painted black and white. Insidious purity.

It was a figure one avoided at all costs; the imperative menace of a morally deficient anatomical professional.

His muttering was barely coherent; as if the multitude of thoughts cohabiting in his brain were tumbling out of his mouth by accident. A voice surprisingly high pitched, tight and without the emotional nuances and cadences normally expected whispered past a nearly sealed orifice.

"Isolated patterns of displacement, chaotic ambience, fluctuated anxiety, realms of paradoxical equations, equilibrium distortion, cohesion integrity, the separation of primary bonds, matter realignment, perfect polarity… probability of occurrence .336%. Hmm…"

Mayuri Kurotsuchi.

A name given to him far past his natural birth, one he wore well, without pride but with an acknowledgment to a form of approval of its worth. His various titles: Captain of Twelfth Company and Second Head to the Department of Research and Development meant near to nothing excluding the meaning behind them.

His curiosity, however, did.

A disposition for which he was notorious; his fixated speculation and examination of life and all its eccentricities. Possessing an insatiable and relentlessly inquiring intellect, he cared little for the comings and goings of any of the districts within the Seireitei walls. Even less for the wandering souls existing externally from the core of his service hub.

They were irrelevant.

At least as far as his interests lay. Orders were orders and if so commanded he would, regardless of whether his prying mind was fed or not, complete any task. Any mission or request would be relevant for the sole reason that the Captain General of the Court Guard Companies would declare it so. However, other than being ordered any individual would be hard pressed, if not unbalanced in the head, to even attempt to convince Mayuri Kurotsuchi to do something benign to him, regardless of whether it concerned souls or the environment in which they survive.

Unless they happened within his radar. 'Natural happenings' were the most intriguing of scientific anomalies and phenomena. Ephemeral emoticon lost substance for him by the instance of their nativity.

Intellectually speaking the riddle overshadowing the foundation of the Soul Society in addition to its expansive history was academically fascinating. The natural cycles eclipsing the world of the living were already known; frequented, understood and as such declared ennui.

At least they were until his subordinate Akon, a leading member of his Research Team and second in command brought file 22704 to his attention: the anomaly in Sector Seven.

His naturally large eyes, which gave the constant impression of being abnormally agitated or excited, holding the ability for almost preternatural levels of focus, couldn't be pulled from the data read outs before him. His painted face displayed only the usual detached interest his expression normally detailed. The members of his highly unusual research team however knew that any interruption for him now would be a harsh lesson in the universal quality of mortality.

He viewed the earth and all it subsidiaries as an enormous Petri dish.

It wasn't an assumption to state this as the condition of living organisms as a whole. Even he fell into that amalgamation of structural existence. A colossal, live sample of energy stimulated formulas to a question. Trite but potent nonetheless.

Life was an equation: one in which all subjects were a component of and where answers were redundant and concurrently unrequited. Something to marvel at, play with and examine but never truly solve. Life was the answer. It was the ever-present 'clue' to what was and what is and what will be. This was declared the reigning glory to the mission of any true scientist. What was of substance was the question. The fascinating criterion. The cause that precedes the effect, its effects that lead to its superseding the cause which later becomes the basis to a cause: a cycle with no beginning or end.

There are no 'right' or 'wrong' answers in science or topics to dissect and break down. The true scientist strives to discover reality in an existence built upon oceans of unidentifiable means and remains; mysteries unexplained, the 'magic' of life, death and transformation.

The 'other' object to attain inexorable notice would be the presentation of the 'brand-new'. The untold and unknown presented in raw, unquantifiable statistics. Exciting. The singularity.

File 22704. Sector Seven. Squad 13's current district of supervision. A cordoned off area seemingly by the vicinities own discretion: an area of perfect and tranquil spatial awareness within a chaotic flux of unidentified energy particles.

The destabilisation of the matter cortex within the sub-level-framework of the world of the living had been a slow evolving crisis; an oscillating molecular integrity deemed more troubling with a degradation cultivated by each turn of the planet on its axis. Unfortunately, strangely, horrifically… the equivalent destabilisation was occurring also throughout the Soul Society but at an augmented rate. Yet he couldn't trace any link.

Time was the most frustrating of enemies.

The more you tried to reach into it, the more diligently you held on then the crueller it would become.

Unblinking eyes inspected the screen before him. "It would seem time, in this case, is of the essence. Strange. I never delve into metaphor. Never rely on ineffectual 'possibilities' and ephemeral abstract conceptions. Yet time is an unmovable, irrevocable variable within this continuum. It is a measurement, a successive existence we were under the illusion of being secure in. We no longer have access to the needed time." He muttered, deciding finally that the data at hand had outlived its usefulness. "As often is the case."

Settling back into the stool he made a steeple of his fingers and gazed introspectively ahead of him.

Two months.

It wasn't enough time to develop a thoroughly investigated criterion to facilitate the comprehension of the ongoing decline of the soul society's membrane wall. The Soul Society existed within an area of subspace: a dimension cordoned off from other dimensions, a plane of existence untouched, existing outside of any mortal coil.

And its allegorical walls were breaking down. His home was slowly corroding, dying.

So far explanations made to elucidate the problem have remained completely null and void by the sheer inexplicable methodology of its linear progression and its adaptive curve. Spiritual, biological, chemical, metaphysical… it didn't matter what possible remedy was thrown at it. The corruption continued, undeterred. Head Captain Genryusai Shigekuni Yamamoto had given the order for Captain Kurotsuchi to locate and obliterate the 'problem'.

Tch. Like the requisite tactical response to a physical attack. He might have laughed if the crisis were a simpler affair. And if he were an individual more inclined to such samples of carefree, idiosyncratic expressionism. Since he was loathe to such wastes of energy it mattered not. Like humans even soul reapers remain such base creatures. An 'attack' they said, not a symptom of long term displacement and corruption. Simple minded fools. Science is a far more complex discipline than the straightforward subject of reason and consequence that the majority of the populace claim to believe.

Not so unexpectedly each attempt at replying to the 'attack' in kind had resulted in solid failures.

Of course they would.

Diagnosing the unnatural phenomenon had resulted in a string of nonsensical and often frustrating data read outs and compilation suggestions that all indicated to one recurring theme. Something was deteriorating the primary 'bonds'; the molecules that were the very structural formula of the Soul Society as a whole, and it was analogous to a specific type of radiation. It made the normally 'sound' molecular state into an 'unsound' state.

That 'something' had quickly become the bane of Mayuri Kurotsuchi's existence.

All living and non-living subjects consisted of differentiated molecular make-ups. The cohesive state of the intermolecular bonds within Reitsu made the soul society, for the most part, impenetrable. A destabilisation of this kind should have been nigh-on impossible: the gradual breakdown of those bonds; it was a simple but exceptionally effective strategy. If he were so disposed to morbidity he'd say they were being targeted for destruction.

Tracing such an infection to its source had also been another lesson in the many realms of futility and the impossible. Any potential instigator, mastermind or stimulus to be had, had been thoroughly scrutinized and so far any plausible source had been rendered spent. And he had no explanation; a concept the Head of Research and Development could not accept. And since a similar decline was occurring within the framework of the world of the living he had no proof whatsoever that either realm was causing the fall of the other. Life and death connected the two but where did one end the other begin?

The miniscule murmur of the entrance behind him, a hiss of air and rotary notions, interrupted his stream of thoughts.

"Captain."

Akon. Of course it was Akon. The only other member of the Department for Research and Development Kurotsuchi allowed within the confines of his private information hub. Unless you were another Captain which goes without saying.

For a long, silent moment both scientist extremists assessed the data layout in front. Akon's shadowed form added another less than comforting presence with his 4-horned adorned forehead and billowing white cloak.

"Were you able to make any headway with the information I provided you with sir?" It was hardly more than a murmur however the sheer volume of the man's respect for the shrouded one before him was almost embarrassingly evident.

"Vexingly, no. Isn't that already apparent?"

Akon exhaled. "You've been known to make astounding discoveries in but moments Captain. Pardon me sir for being somewhat… hopeful."

Those genetically abnormal and peculiarly big eyes flickered north to the face of his standing subordinate. Noting the harshly drawn stress lines already surfacing under and over tired eyes, the only outward indication of a collective anxiety slowly permeating the entirety of the soul society, Captain Kurotsuchi almost shuddered at the word.

He forced a quick measure of air through his nostrils. "Hopeful?" Science abhorred that particular sentimental state of being. "Let us not stoop to such a debasing level just yet Akon. We are not quite the doomed species some claim us to be."

A tight upturn led to a full half smile on Akon's lips. "No sir." His black hair almost as immaculate as his clothes you almost couldn't distinguish his sleep deprived condition. "Lets not."

"Quite."

Akon observed as a single finger tested the skin of Kurotsuchi's chin, eventually moulding an entire hand to its surface. Still watching, Akon's dark, deeply perceptive eyes dimmed in faint recall at the events of the previous week.

When one of the many irrelevant research analysts, from the countless number of his seemingly inconsequential co-workers, had brought to attention one small yet highly significant reporting of an energy distortion somewhere within the immediate vicinity of Sector Seven: Karakura Town; Twelfth Company, having already been on high alert due to the destabilising state of their own home knew that sleep would be few and far between. The unassuming man had meant to pass the data directly over to his superior: Staff Member Rin Tsubokura, the main operator for the Spiritual Wave Measurement lab which oversees the monitoring of the world of the living to ensure its spiritual stability. Though he's more like a child than a man, thought Akon reflexively. More often than not he shows up to his shift with candy stuck between his teeth. Unfortunately the pale faced company member's Squad Master, one Haruto Nami, had confiscated the item under the inequitable grounds for the deliberate disruption of the rotation for work shifts for his own personal inspection. As a result any action into the anomaly had been delayed.

The arrogant numbskull hadn't been seen since Captain Kurotsuchi was made aware of his blunder. No one had mourned the loss.

Already feeling the draining effects of the steady flow of caffeine his system was receding from Akon made an effort to stand firm; arms crossed beneath the folds of his kimono, hands gripping each bicep-

"Enough of that foolishness Akon. Sit down before you fall down."

A second chair rolled out from underneath the consol to the right of his Captain seemingly by its own accord. "Thank you sir."

He sat, barely acknowledging the almost addictive, mind consuming need to fall into the surprisingly lush cushioned back and sleep for days. Mentally he was above such requirements. Instead he focused upon his mentor and Chief.

He found him growing increasingly agitated as his fingers made short work of the complex array of buttons; colourful buttons blaring from red to gold in a hypnotic series of flashes. "Where is that blasted Nemu when I need her!" The Chief of Bureau snapped; his high toned voice almost needle-like.

Akon's head tilted sideways. "She's patching herself up." A close to disturbing yet acknowledging smile drifted over his thin mouth. "No one else could take your experiments with as much restraint."

"Inevitable. I built her to endure." The matter-of-fact response was delivered without thought. The product of an incredibly secure mindscape.

A nod. "Recognising how behind schedule this would make her she provided me with the information needed." Her legs being unable to support more than a pound of weight had made it impossible for the woman to follow the imperative instruction of her 'Father': to deliver to him the results of her examination post-haste.

Fingers continued to tap against buttons and manic eyes fixated on the screen as information rolled by. "It will have to do."

Aware of the opening Akon strove onwards, pulling out a slightly battered file from his robes and opening to the third page. "The energy reading emanating from within Division 4 of Sector 7 of the world of the living revealed a stand-alone quantum state. A perfect quantum state."

"Indeed."

Eyes skimming paragraphs, even skipping entire pages altogether he continued. "There is no available comparison or any remotely relevant information in our database concerning the energy signature. On a whim the Lieutenant compared the integrity of the exotic particles demonstrated in the affected zone in the world of the living with the declining molecular cohesion of the Soul Society's substructure for any trace of a pattern or a correspondent that could provide some form of prototype…" Trailing off he flipped through the paper work in his hands and suddenly stopped still. The frown pulling his eyebrows together looked sharp and painful in the glare of the computer screen.

Hands locked around the fragile paper, his fingers almost tearing holes through the pages he held.

This is…

Sensing a change Captain Kurotsuchi paused in his analysis of the progression of the apparent reitsu 'virus' (possessing an intellect of astounding genius he was able to multi-task quite well) and peered at his pupil, his head barely moving an inch.

His tone was brisk. "What is it Akon?"

Akon's disbelieving eyes took in the paper for a second more. "…They're a match."

The sinister contour to Kurotsuchi's own eyes narrowed. "What do you mean: 'a match'?"

A dumbfounded sweat had begun its slow course down the sides of Akon's face. "I mean… I mean there's a perfect commonality in the inter-material composition of the unknown particles from both samples: sample 6 derived from the atmospheric read-out from the soul society and the data report extracted from sector 7: Karakura." His head shot up, presenting a less than calm venire to his boss.

That unusually shaped hat perched precariously on top of the Captain's head didn't even tremble as he leaned to the side. "That is absurd." A sole, alien composite that could affect both reitsu molecules and atoms from the world of the living? Plus the results from both had been quite different…

"No sir, the same particle coefficient was present in both samples, which were obtained by you yourself Captain!"

"You stated that the energy emission in the Sector 7 was a perfect quantum state: a measurement of pristine stabilisation so unlike the rest of the town. So unlike the Soul Society as it now stands. By their nature alone they are far from similar."

"But that's exactly it!" Leaning forward the subordinate reached out and tapped several buttons in quick succession until another outlook opened onscreen displaying a series of analytic results which to anyone other than Twelfth Company would find impossible to understand. "It is as if we're witnessing a complete reversal." He pointed an index finger towards the left hand side. "The results for the affected zone in Sector 7 displaying a perfect quantum state of integrity." He then moved his hand to stab breathlessly at the right hand side of the screen displaying a set of results the complete opposite of the ones running down the left. "And the results for the degradation of… of the soul society as a whole. They're of an almost identical molecular makeup except for their molecular function! As if they're contradictory. The exotic particles discovered in each zone are close to indistinguishable except to the way they operate, to their design! To the untrained eye it would have been missed. One, equivalent to a lethal pathogen the purpose of which is to break down primary bonds, the other, an archetype for perfect cohesion! Both could even originate from a corresponding source!"

Moments passed as Captain Kurotsuchi stared, beguiled and, for the first time in decades, bewildered at the screen. Patterns began to emerge in his mind, each seeking a course his frustrated intellect had been unable to venture down only minutes before.

Possibilities…

"It would seem Akon…" He began unhurriedly, as if what had just been revealed were nothing more than a mere change in their use of standard-issue toilet paper. "That we have given ourselves yet another problem. And in that problem I believe is our solution."

Feeling utterly perplexed Akon could only blink at his superior; his previously animated disposition drooping somewhat. "Sir?"

"If it is true that both anomalies possess analogous traits or an equivalent and given the atypical yet linking, parallel differences between each occurrence I'd speculate they both stem from a single source of origin. Possibly an object, a place… or the least likely option, a person. In theory at least. I highly doubt it could stem from a single individual." A sound escaped his nose close to a snort. "Ludicrous. There isn't an organism alive that possesses such authority; we'd know."

A shiver ran its course up Akon's spine. I agree. But then how…? He almost curled in on himself at the thought. "Theoretically speaking then, how could one person possess such a-"

"Theoretically speaking?"

"Yes sir."

"…I don't know."

And hearing those three words, those repugnant and previously improbable words trespass unwanted from his Captain's lips made the threat of the situation abundantly clear. "We need to report this to the General, Captain."

Kurotsuchi still stood motionless in front of the two sets of data. "No."

"But, sir-"

"Not yet Akon. Not until I have run my own tests." Finally he moved, stunning Akon once again as he pivoted swiftly, striding resolutely towards the door. "A thorough investigation is needed before we set off a tide of events that, if not handled properly, could lead to our ruin. Besides the probability of a human being the source is so very far past a 'likely' scenario…"

Knowing he was meant to follow (otherwise his leader who strangely enough, on occasion, was a bit absent minded and would talk believing his subordinates were a step behind him when he in fact was alone) Akon was already by the Head of his Department's side. "Our ruin?"

The clear explanation he expected wasn't quite the one he received. "The phenomenon is a fascinating one: a foreign power with similarities to reitsu's molecular potential for spiritual affinities and sub-atomic structure but altogether quite alien, possessing the potential to both reconstruct and deconstruct spiritual, even quantum energy." Both men strode forwards towards the lower level elevator; one listening with rapt attention, the other exploratory and… curious. Dangerous. "It would suggest the 'source' owns a form of 'government' over life.

Normally of a more serious disposition the relative concentration in Akon's expression spoke volumes now of the gravity the new information bestowed upon the many echelons of their society. "Life? You mean reitsu? I don't understand."

They stepped inside, aiming for the third floor many stories above them after which the Captain merely cocked his head to the side as if straining for a sound only he could distinguish other than the low whir of the lift as it rose. "All energy is a form of life Akon; don't be so narrow minded." His tone was almost disappointed but for the most part indifferent.

The lines on Akon's forehead bunched. I still don't understand. What, in all existence, could possibly have that kind of ruler ship?

Kurotsuchi continued much as usual. "Of course it is something we've never seen before, which explains why any information regarding the phenomenon wasn't found. None exists. It's brand new or at least appears to be." His tone almost caressed the words, sliding over their meaning that beheld a nature analogous to the infamous double edged sword.

"If we are able to locate the cause of the anomaly within Sector 7…" Akon began.

"Then we may also be able to find a solution regarding the problem within our own metaphorical walls."

The elevator came to a stop and before the 'ping' even rang through the subsequent hallway Kurotsuchi had marched over the threshold, strolling past the white washed walls. "I must find Nemu. Results are required within the fortnight and I delve to have an answer."

Slowing his pace as his teacher did Akon spoke before reaching the open arched consultation room beyond. "Sir, should we not also take into account the above normal frequency and discharge of reitsu from Squad Thirteen's, Sector 7 patrol man?"

The importance of the question was dismissed almost immediately. "It is inconsequential. Soul Reapers who venture out into the world of the living have previously been reported to take rapid and inexplicable leaps in power and strength. Experience under threat of imminent death by hollow can occasionally, depending on the individual, aid in the development of their Shikai's." Their walk ceased, large eyes shooting towards the ceiling in thought. "From what I remember the preceding soul reaper chosen as guardian over Karakura Town wasn't a highly seated officer but possessed a modicum of skill." He looked back towards Akon. "There is a considerable chance that this person, whoever he or she may be, has unleashed their zanpacto in the light of their coming into contact with a stronger than average opponent. From previous accounts with other soul reapers stationed throughout Japan the reitsu outputted during those moments was said to have been quite different to their customary emission, as Shikai's emit an altogether more concentrated level of reitsu. I refuse to worry about something which may have absolutely no relevance to the current crisis. I'm more interested in the fact that we were able to obtain samples of this new rise in reitsu in the first place."

…What? Re-securing his arms within their large sleeves Akon bowed his head. "Yes sir."

His Captain's eyes bored holes in his skull. "I will not refute the possibility Akon. There may very well be some relevance, some connection. As a scientist I know that anything is possible within the realm of reality. But until an established link is made through the research we will traverse through in the next few weeks I order you to concentrate solely on the exotic energy." It was as close to a consolation that anyone existing in this world or another, alive or dead, could ever hope to expect.

And with that Mayuri Kurotsuchi left his subordinate and strode decisively away to where he knew Nemu would be resting. The indolent child! "Now where is she? Nemu?!"

.

.

.

.

.

Somewhere in Sakurabashi…

Blue. Everything was so blue.

"I miss the sunsets…"

The statement broke through the comfortable silence that had befallen the two girls walking together. Pulled away from her personal thoughts Tatsuki turned her head to face the busty girl beside her, blinking at the babyish tone Orihime had employed. She opened her mouth, uttering what she considered to be a, well, pretty fairly eloquent response.

"Huh?"

Orihime pouted up at the bright, blue sky. If the girl didn't know any better she would have thought it was midday. "The sunsets. Usually when we walk home the sun is close to setting."

Okay. Scratching the side of her skull Tatsuki searched for an appropriate response to the oddity of Orihime's usual chatter. "Orihime, the sun is still going to set you know, just a little later on than usual." She sighed theatrically, dark eyebrows raising flippantly, going against the norm and waxing poetic. "Such is the whim of summer."

It was safe to assume however that Orihime's thoughts were not solely on the change in planetary position. Regarding her hands wrapped around the strap of the bag that she carried in front of her the auburn haired dreamer let out a sigh. "It reminded me of Kurosaki kun's hair."

Ah. Of course it did.

Then a strange sinking sensation somewhere deep in Tatsuki's stomach almost made her pause. Her steps faltered but she quickly caught herself. Taking a not so furtive peak at her friend, Tatsuki found those large grey orbs focused distantly elsewhere. She found her own dark eyes focused forwards too, gaze hazy, looking into a place she'd already been immersed in for most of the day.

The breeze rustled her short hair. She's probably thinking about how weird Ichigo was acting today.

It was beyond true. Even before he'd disappeared with Mai, then reappearing just as lunch was coming to a close. And how for the rest of the day he'd more or less spent it brooding over some such or other.

Not that it's strange or anything. If there's a word to describe Ichigo with it's brooding. I'd add pensive to that but…

Looking back through her memories, to Tatsuki, Ichigo had never exactly been the introspective sort. When she first met him all those years ago at the dojo he'd been so incandescently sweet, content and innocent she hadn't quite known how to behave around him. It wasn't as if she, at just four years old, had been a rebel. But compared to the wet lettuce that Ichigo had been she'd been a certifiable 'bad girl'. It just goes to show how times change.

Since, as time trickled forwards, he developed a hardness about him that she hadn't ever really understood.

…Suki.

She could still practically hear him as he was back then.

Hey Suki!

Suki, you okay?

He used to refer to her as 'Suki', a juvenile endearment she'd never admitted to adoring. But then, out of nowhere, in the summer during fifth grade, he'd started to, instead, call her Tatsuki. Bluntly. Without boyish affection. Ten years old, they'd been walking home from karate practise with more than a few bruises between them when…

"Why do you keep using my real name? It's really annoying!"

Beside her in his shorts, t-shirt and backpack, Ichigo just walked on, looking ahead. "It doesn't matter does it? Tatsuki."

Their footsteps echoed out of sync across the pavement. "Tsk. You're really annoying." She'd grumbled.

"Sorry."

Right.

A spec of confusion had flashed in his eyes, as if he hadn't understood why he'd had to apologise in the first place. She could clearly see the 'girls are weird' expression drawn across his face.

She hadn't exactly been all that irritated with him but she hadn't really been very happy either. It'd hurt. It had felt like…

It felt like sadness. A kind of sadness that twisted and grew to new confounding levels of unease. The death of something she had considered special. And that Ichigo… obviously hadn't.

"Yo Tatsuki."

…Like in sixth grade when he'd finally grown taller than her and how their height difference since then had continued to increase. Bastard. How it had actually made her worry. Or in eighth grade when she lost in a spar against him, the first time she'd ever lost against Ichigo Kurosaki… the first time she'd glimpsed the man he could be, how strong and capable he was already becoming and the shock that she'd somehow missed that transformation along the way… and the fact that ever since then he'd flat out refused to fight her again.

That feeling of being surpassed and left behind…

How he'd seemed to erect an invisible wall around himself after they both went to separate middle schools. How he never opened up to her the way he used to when they'd been too tiny to be smart, too young to be cynical, when she'd stood with him against his tormentors. How trying to get past the barrier was like battering her entire being against an invisible force field. And how he didn't even seem to notice he was doing it. How indifferent he seemed to it. How she couldn't get across it; that there was a part of her friend which she had no access to. How there was now a part of Ichigo she didn't understand and knew deep down that she never would, because he didn't want her to see. He didn't want to share.

Not with her.

At one time or another both had said, or thought, they were best friends. But that had changed. How? Worse still, yet again, he seemed totally at ease with the distance between them. Not that they weren't close anymore but… but now there's a line.

And how, just like back then, she didn't know why he'd been acting strangely today. She was completely stumped on it. Even Orihime didn't know what to make of it and she's usually so intuitive when it comes to him.

And don't even get me started on first period. How Rukia Kuchiki, for some strange reason, had SIMULTANEOUSLY managed to drag both Ichigo and Mai out of the class room, kicking and screaming (literally: because she's Captain bloody Marvel), none of them returning until the period had ended with Ichigo looking as if he'd been sentenced to a firing squad.

Keigo and Mizuiro had more or less considered the incident to be hilarious; a class tale to remember, starring the three secret keepers, the pictures on Mizuiro's mobile phone a testament and evidence to tease Ichigo with for all eternity. A little confused by Rukia's contradicting display of tiny-girl strength Tatsuki had tried in vain to get his attention but he'd simply dismissed any and all attempts in favour of wallowing in self pity at his desk, definitely a little pissed off.

But then she'd caught him trading notes again with Mai. Completely brazen, in the middle of the classroom. Rukia, Chad and one of Orihime's groupies, Kotetsu Shuito, the ever-present quiet man were their passers. And it wouldn't be the first time.

But… it had seemed so easy for him. So natural.

She remembered, after the note had been passed, how he'd re-focus back onto whatever the teacher was droning on about until eventually (lasting a full 30 seconds) he'd surreptitiously glance right towards Mai to see if she were replying. His hand would sometimes lift to rub at the back of his neck and stay there, leaning on it as he'd loose track of where he was looking until he was flat out staring at the brunette.

The focus in it could only be described as pervasive.

A cynical smile curved the side of Tatsuki's lips. Normally I'd say 'if I know Ichigo, he wouldn't be caught dead trading messages with a girl or a guy regardless of their friendship statuses'. It wasn't a stretch of the imagination; she wasn't even overstating it. Once, in their last year at elementary she'd tried to pass a note to him in class. He'd nuked the idea by asking, nice and loud in the middle of a lesson, with his newly developed but now trademark scowl smacked across his face, why she couldn't just talk to him normally. Another time Tatsuki had also caught Rukia slipping the scowler a note once during Chemistry class.

As stated: it happened once.

His reaction had been completely over the top. That disturbed, aggressive quality to his tweaked scowl and the sheer incredulous disgust displayed for everyone in the class to edge away from, misunderstanding and checking the floor to make sure he hadn't spilled anything corrosive, put a stop to any and all note passing thereof. What the hell had been in the note? A picture of two guys doing it?

But Mai sends him a note? He doesn't say a word. Doesn't bat an eye. Except to correspond. With enthusiasm. More often than not Ichigo's the one passing notes in the first place!

It made her wonder again at what the trio was keeping from the rest of them. It could simply be something small and silly, but it didn't take away the fact that those three were the weirdest behaving trio in school. Ichigo, Mai and Rukia.

Chewing on the inside of her cheek Tatsuki's hand reached out, on reflex alone, towing Orihime by the arm and away from the busy road as a mere second before the day-dreamer almost got run over by a truck. One yelp and swerve later and they moving towards the row of flats where her friend lived, Orihime laughing at herself as Tatsuki, used to it, gave a weary laugh and eye roll.

…It is kind of odd though. We all start our first year at Karakura High and I didn't even see Ichigo and Mai meet. I've got to admit, she's capable of kicking butt and you can tell she is just by looking at her sometimes. It's not something you can normally see but being around martial artists 60% of the time can get you to perceive what most would normally miss. And she's unbelievably sincere. It took me maybe three seconds to like her and another three to start respecting her. And it was mutual. That's impressive.

But I blink and before I know it she and Ichigo are passing notes. When they talk to each other you can tell how focused she is on whatever he's saying. When I first met Mai I thought her eyes were ordinary. Sure they were green, which is a minority eye colour at school but they weren't exactly so striking that you'd get caught up in them. I was wrong about that. When she's giving me her entire attention the intensity of it sometimes makes me want to take a step back.

Not a step forwards, like a certain tactless, deficient, orange haired wonder I know.

He stares at her. Sometimes it looks like he's just confused about something. Other times it's as if he's just bored. Maybe he likes annoying her. But there are times when he also looks interested. If I didn't know how retarded he is when it comes to girls I'd think that he…

Then Rukia shows up and just five minutes later, LITERALLY, she's his new favourite pal.

There's nothing wrong with that I suppose but… did they both have to be girls?

The deprived tone of her mental whine almost made her feel disgusted with herself. Since when had she become such a teenage girl? Pretty ones too? Rukia's gorgeous and Mai… can't quite find a word for her really. Out of all of us though I think it's safe to say that Orihime has the majority vote on beauty. I fully admit I'm biased but, what the hell right? If I'm going to vote for someone it might as well be my best friend!

Not that I know what I'm voting for exactly.

"Tatsuki?"

Orihime's voice had always been soft yet somehow she also managed to perfectly reveal how concerned she was for the person she spoke to.

Crap. Well done Tatsuki, for once you were the one caught day dreaming. "Hm?" I'm perfectly copasetic.

"You were staring. We made it home already."

Huh? Indeed they had. Looking up Tatsuki saw the modest set of flats that looked more like two large houses pinned together and received an unwelcome flash of memory. Herself a couple of weeks ago, terrified and bruised, pinned to the floor by something she couldn't see or feel but could suffer the weight of.

And the blurry image of Rukia's Kuchiki's back. In her pj's. Yeah.

That night something had transpired. A something both she and Orihime had both talked about quietly one afternoon when the silence of secrets became too much for them to handle. Since then, slowly but surely, Tatsuki had begun to see things. Just blurs really. Blurs of images; images that she didn't comprehend. That's all. But she'd also get feelings too, feelings that nagged at the back of her brain and tightened her throat. The worst part of it was that she didn't know what any of it meant and it looked like she wouldn't be getting any answers for it soon.

The only piece of useful information she'd managed to gleam that night had been that she'd seen Rukia. Orihime, eager to solve what she described as a true 'Agatha Christie mystery story' had shared that she too had seen someone.

She'd seen Ichigo.

Now how the hell did he fit into it? And what does Mai have to do with any of this? Does she even have anything to do with this? All I know is what my gut tells me… and it tells me that all three of them are involved in something somehow.

A quiet sigh broke free from Orihime. "It's been a weird day hasn't it?"

"That's one way of putting it."

Blinking, she tilted her head, big innocent eyes already asking the question she uttered. "How would you describe it?"

Looking skyward for a moment Tatsuki thought about it. "Er, tits up?"

The scandalised yet embarrassed-happy-surprised expression on her friend's face made her grin shamelessly. "Tatsuki!" Orihime's blush was in full bloom.

"Orihime!" She sang with a laugh.

Let's not dismiss the unbelievably screwed up events of the school day leading up to lunch but how does a person even describe having 'left' turned to 'right' and 'up' swung 'down'? Ichigo had kissed Orihime's hand. That fact that he'd dared kiss anyone, hand or no, messed up her brain cells. Her ability to concentrate had been severely limited for the rest of the day. He'd been completely bent. Wacko! Not the friend she'd known all these years. But Tatsuki didn't have the mental power to spare for it at the moment; her mind was occupied with something a little more sinister.

She folded her arms across her chest. "Orihime? Remember those guys during lunch break?"

The girl nodded her head. "Yes." For a moment she appeared almost… nervous. Apprehensive. "I didn't like what they said."

"…Me neither."

Earlier:

"Does anyone here even have Ichigo's number?"

Being a friend of his for so long she hadn't asked for his new mobile digits: she already knew his house number. She knew his address. Tatsuki was used to dealing with his eccentric father so if she ever wanted Ichigo for anything she just had to call him. Besides Ichigo didn't have any haunts other than home and school… at least not that she knew about.

The problem now however was that Ichigo, Mai and Rukia had been absent from school since third period. There was fourth before lunch and soon the bell for fifth would ring.

Sitting outside, Tatsuki and the girls (Orihime, Michiru, Mahana, Ryo, and Chizuru) had managed to drag the boys (Keigo, Mizuiro and Chad) to their usual lunch haunt by the trees. They hadn't put up much of a fight to the envy of every other guy on class. The image of Keigo's 'hit the jackpot' smirk and Mizuiro's fake innocence expression echoed through her skull. Boys, yeesh.

It was Mizuiro who spoke first; he was sitting crossed legged and his face was, as usual, almost pressed against the screen of his mobile. "I already tried his cell; it was turned off."

Since they'd all sat on the grass Keigo's besotted gaze had remained fixed on the open area bracketed by brick that the students would peruse in through at the start of a school day and eagerly rush out of at the end of it. It was as if he figured that if he stared hard enough Rukia would waltz through it naked and into his open arms.

Tatsuki sweatdropped, looking at him in disbelief at his piteous lack of shame, she could practically see his boy-hood, romantic daydream shining epically above his skull: it explained why he kept sighing like that.

Tatsuki snorted. Like that would ever happen. 'Infamously delusional' should rhyme, in a creepy yet appropriate pervert jingle, with Keigo Asano.

Out of the norm it was Mahana who approached the elephant sized obstacle in the yard. "So first Ichigo acts like he's totalled his brain, then Mai loosens a screw…and then Rukia decides 'what the heck; I'll join them' and disappears from class?" Her caramel eyes studied the group, shooting from friend to the next. "Anything going around that I should know about?"

The height of Tatsuki's eye roll could be considered worthy of a Guinness World Record. "They haven't caught a sickness Mahana." Someone, somewhere, be helpful please.

You could practically see the exclamation signs beside her head. "Then what the hell was all that about?" She snapped her hand down against the ground in embellishment, almost spitting food on all of them.

"Beats me."

Only Orihime saw through Tatsuki's nonchalant shrug to the truth.

Whereas Ryo, Mahana, Keigo and Mizuiro more or less considered the whole thing to be hilarious now that they could look back on it, Michiru's fearful image of Kurosaki had only managed to become more disturbing and Chizuru was pretty much foaming at the mouth at the idea of Ichigo's lips touching any part of Orihime's anatomy, regardless of whether or not her hand was considered pretty tame territory. Out of all of them however Tatsuki had been the most stunned. And the most troubled.

The most questioning.

They hadn't been outside for more than five minutes when a trio of upper class-men slouched over to them.

They didn't beat around the bush. "Hey, do you guys hang around with Mai Li?"

Tatsuki leaned back on the hands, looking up at the group. "Yeah, we do."

There was a moment of uneasy silenced as the trio glanced at each other.

Surprising them all Chad spoke up. "Do you want something with her?" He was leaning against a large tree, one eye visible beneath his shaggy brown hair zeroing in on them.

Two of them where guys, both about 17 and there was a girl with them, a little younger. At Chad's question they exchanged another look that was now borderline the 'something is strange here and it's not us' territory. The guy closest to them shifted, a frown marring his almost handsome face. "You're actually friends with her?"

He sounded so taken aback to have what he'd obviously already been thinking confirmed that it almost covered up the appalled tone lacing his words. Almost.

Confusion ran over the group of friends sitting on the lawn. "I just said we were." A scowl was beginning to form on Tatsuki's face. This wasn't the first time they'd been approached about their friendship with Mai and it was beginning to annoy her. "What's the problem?"

From the back Mizuiro piped up. "This isn't the first time we've been asked that question."

Beside him Keigo exchanged a nod with Chad. "Yeah, some third years were asking about it a while ago."

"Is it strange that she'd be friends with us?"

It was the guy rooted behind the other two that answered them. He was pretty tall, standing over his friends by several inches. "It's actually stranger that she's friends with anybody really."

The way he said it, as if the notion were unthinkable… His voice contained only the barest hints of emotion that it took a moment for the statement to process properly. His friends gave him a shared grimace that suggested the boy was less than sensitive 100% of the time. The girl opted to explain to the sea of frowning, close to insulted expressions before her.

"What he means is that she's, well…" Her eyes traced around the area as if searching for the right word before giving up. "Awful. No, really!" She tried to emphasize her point with the most annoyingly honest expression on her face and a vehement head nod. "I mean why would you even want to be friends with her?" There was no venom, no mean-girl tone accompanying the words. They were spoken as if factual.

And she asked the question with the expectation of an answer. She truly wanted to know.

But there was silence for almost five seconds. Then Tatsuki couldn't keep it in anymore. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?!"

"Yeah, what kind of thing is that to say about a person?" Mahana said, backing her up, hands on her hips and halfway to standing.

The girl looked super confused. "You mean you don't know?"

"Know what?" By Chad's tone you'd think he was simply cloud gazing but there was an underlying edge to it that reminded everyone around him of the durability and lasting impression of a tank.

The almost handsome third year's expression cleared, an 'oh of course, that's it' expression dawning on his face. "That explains it." His friends turned to him in unison and he shrugged. "Come on, if they knew they wouldn't want to be in the same classroom as her, screw friendship."

The muscle at the back of Tatsuki's clenched fist twitched. "Hey!" The trio jumped. "If one of you doesn't explain things, pronto, I'm-"

Almost-handsome raised his hands swiftly in a pacifying expression. "Look, all we're saying is that…" Again he turned to look at his friends for assistance but they seemed a little hesitant. His hand rose, scratching at his skull. "Just be careful, okay. If she's got you all fooled there isn't really anything I can say to you except watch your backs. We're trying to warn you alright?"

What the heck?

Without warning a peal of laughter rang out as Ryo, Mahana, Michiru and Chizuru chose now to react, if in a way that's a little unorthodox, whilst shooting each other baffled looks: a clear 'WTF have they been smoking'. As if the very idea of Mai being dangerous was baffling. Orihime's face appeared torn over whether to laugh, stare bemusedly at the upper class-men or simply sit there lost.

Mizuiro on the other hand held no expression on is face. He was a blank canvas. Chad had simply taken to leaning back against the tree, his visible eye staring down at his open hands. Keigo on the other hand looked as if he'd never heard anything more ridiculous.

"What the hell dude! You don't even know her!"

The girl took over. "No, but we know someone who does. He recognised her during the first week of school. He was kind of stunned that she was attending here at all." She glanced at her two friends, the shorter nodded and smiled, amused at the idea.

"Yeah, I mean did the school even do a background check?"

Uncomfortable now, Keigo's eyes flickered towards Mizuiro, Chad then back to the trio. "You make her sound like she's a criminal."

"She is."

It was the tall one who opted to give an immediate answer. He stood straight and serious, his expression serene except for the cold truth to his gaze. All of them could only look at him, mouths open, stunned, bewildered, disbelieving… curious. And that was the worst of it. That some of them were actually wondering.

Now

And now Tatsuki could only wonder some more. Again. It was something she was getting good at.

.

.

.

.

.

Chiyu's Onsen

In a far off land (Japan) there was a quiet but prosperous little village (Karakura Town, which in actual fact is about as big as a freaking city), beholden to an enchanted castle (Chiyu's Onsen; not exactly a castle). In the top most room (just the reception area) of the tallest tower (the first floor) sat a beautiful young maiden (stood a mug-faced Pei, far from maiden-hood who looked like she'd slap anyone who disturbed her 'zoning out' pastime) who despaired of never ever meeting her Prince Charming (Pei, who knew Prince Charming was secretly gay and overrated anyway and was only in need of psychological counselling at this point and who hadn't even talked to another teenager, boy or girl excluding Mai, in months was beyond deprived. There was, as of yet, no cure).

So far past her poor, dispossessed state the fair maiden was left feeling somewhat forlorn. Her softly spoken (hah! Softly spoken?! Right!) thoughts floated like clouds into the afternoon air…

God, do I need a boyfriend. Like right now. Before the unexploited areas of my feminine wiles fall into disrepair, it's that dire. My good looks and slinky legs are being completely wasted! I grieve for my long gone youth! It's passing me by! Just in case you're all wondering she only turns seventeen in July. And all because I work here!

It couldn't get any worse than this. Today. Took. The. BISCUIT. The crumbs of its echoes are still haunting me!

Elbows leaning against the surface of the reception desk Pei cupped her face with her hands positioned like the half-moon bowl shape of a chalice, the weight of her head pressing heavily into her palms. She puffed out the melancholic but noisy exhale that she'd contained all day and it made her fringe blow upwards momentarily.

Yep, it's definitely sad, her 'mental' voice complained: a reverberation through her skull like a pre-recording.Glazed over eyes simply stared ahead of her almost mournfully in self-sympathy. Except they were a little… lifeless. 'Stunned', would be the appropriate adjective.

I've just seen my third naked guy stroll, without shame I might add, right past me and I didn't even blink. I DIDN'T blink. Not once. It didn't bother me at all. I didn't drop what I was holding, scream 'RAPIST', try my own very ineffective version of 'crouching tiger, hidden dragon' on his ass (for I am not as studdly as Mai), or run to my mother to question her sanity for the billionth time on why she thought it would be such a great, opportunistic idea for me to start working at an Onsen before I turn 18. Nope, I didn't do a thing! I just stood there, yeah? And instead of destroying the man's ball sac like a sane teenager I bowed like a good little pillock and said 'good afternoon sir'.

A long suffering whine sounded out from her throat and she briefly shut her eyes against the image of that scene which bounded back to her with a vengeance. Everything had been on display. Everything. Omitting nothing. Get the picture?

And yet I think I've actually become desensitized. Thoroughly and completely like mum, ugh (truly Nightmare-Ville), who owes me shit loads in remuneration for what will probably be a lifetime of therapy. And what would I say to my future therapist? 'I had been forced to serve naked, middle aged businessmen their tea as they bathe'. I swear they don't even try to cover up. Perverts.

Her thoughts (moans, whines, lamentations etc) were disrupted by jaunty whistling echoing down the corridor. Shit. Without shifting from her very natural self-pitying slump (cough 'pose' cough), her eyes flickered right to where a series of doors were positioned side by side in natural pine wood. The door to the steam room stood wide open at the very end of the hall and Pei watched, feeling the apprehension and despondency pour thickly into her gut, as one very naked grandfather of a man walked, in no hurry at all (how nice of him), towards her. Her thoughts trespassed on the border of a 'waaaaaa-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaa-wwaaaaa' baby cry.

Okay, he wasn't quite naked. A towel, wrapped pretty bleeding loosely and way to low around him to be considered his waist line covered the more… revealing and edifying region of his assets. It didn't help, not even a little, that his entire body was sweating from the steam. It did little to inspire Pei's heated daydreams of very young naked men coming to the Onsen to steal her heart with a mighty wave of their very muscular arms. Far from it. This man, for example, had quite the Buddha-belly on him and apart from being as old as the dinosaurs he also had… yuck, too much body hair that, even if he were fifty years younger, she still wouldn't consider him by any means of the word, attractive.

Yet the piesta de resistance to her thoughts didn't arrive until the old man moved past her (because she was wallpaper of course; just the daughter of the conglomerate, no one special), aiming for the lounge for what she figured to probably be for some more sake or green tea or something (which is probably what they do all day; get wasted along with speculating how they're masters of the universe), and revealed to her a most perfect and extremely unwanted sliver view of his very unappealing, saggy, wrinkly backside.

Oh my god…

I give you naked guy number four. And that, right there, is the reason why I'll probably be a virgin until I'm forty. It's enough to put you off carnal pleasures for life. God hates me!

She almost started crying what would be tearless sobs of a pathetic nature. But it seemed now that she was far past such petty attempts at guilt tripping her mother just for shits and giggles. So, dully, she turned her attention back to watching paint dry... which reminded her duly that she was in desperate need of a manicure. Oh yes, these are fun times. I have this to look forward to for the rest of my life. Good times here I come. She gave a little mental fist pump that possessed absolutely no enthusiasm. Yahoo.

And that's were it starts; the problem. It wasn't supposed to be like this.

It wasn't as if she suffered from unmet aspirations. In truth, the latest major change in her life was constructed in a form of the gift that kept on giving and it could all be laid down at the feet of her parents. Good for them. Moving to Karakura, a defensive plan of action years in the making had so far created more of an ameliorating affect, especially on select members of her small circle of loved ones, than Pei had thought possible. Originally she had figured the action to be more analogous to dodging a ricochet bullet than a premeditated plan: a reflex jump against the backlash of suburbia nonsense that a town of feckless, ignorant, jumped up, aggressors could procure.

And they'd aimed all their hard-line, superior, nonsensically fearful hype at Mai. For years. What could one girl do against a town determined to hate, fear, judge and blame her for every unanswered moment in time? Backwater idiots. So tough, ganging up against a twelve year old.

It was… painful remembering how Mai used to be as a child; a precocious, hyperactive preschooler, an elementary school reject and a middle school nightmare. However it helped somewhat for Pei to reflect on how she, herself, was like as a kid and on how knowing the most connected of souls had changed her for the better. Because that's where she found her calling, by knowing Mai Li. The girl next door. Bug saver, tree hugger, fairy queen. Literally. Her cousin, sister and best friend: not so literally in blood but in all the ways that count and more.

A girl who'd been slowly crushed by the harsh marks of time…

"Pei, you crushed bug!"

"I… what? No I didn't!"

"Yes you did! You crushed little bug bug!"

"But bugs are groooooss!"

"S-spiders maybe…But bugs are pwetty, pwetty cr-creatw… er, creatures. They are alive! Like us! And warm like you!"

"Like me?"

"Mmm-hmm! They like hugs and things too!"

"Bugs like hugs?"

"Yep! Like this!"

"WHA!?"

With the assurance that Mai wouldn't crush her bones again Pei had promised to never kill a bug unless absolutely necessary.

"People are so light. And wavy."

"…Wavy?"

"Yes. They all shine brightly like fireflies."

"Well, I don't see any light!"

"You wouldn't, because you're shining brightly too!"

"Hmph! Maybe… but why do you see it then Mai?"

"I see it because I don't shine. Because I'm grey. There's something I don't have and I think it makes me unworthy."

Pei never did understand what she had meant by those words but had nevertheless tried to convince Mai otherwise of her own apparently less than colourful shine. But Mai had always been unbelievably hard on herself, like an earned, ingrained, deeply twisted inheritance… as if she simply wasn't allowed to believe she was worth more…

"Found you Pei-Pei!"

"Aw man, how?!"

"Don't know. But I'll always be able to find you, so you'll have nothing to worry about. Do you want to play again?"

Pei never scored a victory playing hide-and-go-seek with Mai. Like so many other things Mai thought on a different wavelength to the rest of the world…

"Pei, you're not like me. And that's alright. I wouldn't wish in any universe a 'you that was 'me."

Even then, before her eyes seeped dark, dark things, Mai had viewed her life as something unnatural without sense or reason…

"I think it's silly for anyone to think that you're ugly Pei-Pei. Those girls were just… You know, girls can be mean because they don't understand their own beauty. You're so pretty and that's why they did that, because the difference is palpable to them. They felt inferior. And your name is too! A pretty name for pretty flower."

"B-but you're pretty too; is that why they don't like you? You were bleeding again on Friday after you came home from school. I saw you from the window…"

"Nah, he, he, you don't need to worry so much about me Pei. Seriously, what's there to worry about? I have you, mom, dad, Jihi, and Chiyu: I'm invincible!"

Invincible. Pei could almost believe it. She'd been oblivious at the time to how much trouble Mai was actually in as opposed to how much trouble Pei had believed a ten year old could get into and didn't worry anywhere nearly enough. Mai's parents were around at the time. But what would happen when, not if, those emotional shields where rendered asunder…

"What they've been saying… Is it true? Mai? That you talk to yourself?"

"Of course I do, everybody does. You do it too you know; don't think I don't notice. It's not like you're exempt or anything."

"Hah, Like I would."

"Too right. In reality everyone in the world is outlandish and performs eccentric behaviour. Therefore everyone in the world is a freak, which means inevitably that no one really is."

"That applies to you too Mai."

"Ah, but I'm freakish in the truest sense of the word. Please, let me keep my anti-social status; I think it's the only title that will ever be bestowed upon me. Plus, remember how out of the two of us I was born the weird one? It isn't exactly a new thing with me; it's an everyday occurrence."

"Okay, I'll give you that."

"Oh. Gee, how nice of you."

"Why reject the truth when it's so obvious? But seriously, is it true? That you speak to the dead?"

"Wait, what? Who told you I speak to the dead?"

"Misao from school."

"She did, did she?"

"I made her shut up about it and told her to leave you alone… but she didn't did she?"

"I'm alright Pei."

"Mai, I saw you! After school! They cornered you again didn't they?"

"Yeah, but it's fine. Come on, it isn't something I haven't dealt with before, you know that. It was kind of tame really."

"God Mai, enough with the tough-guy routine."

"Actually it's more of an 'I've dealt with it before and as such it is now getting kind of boring rather than intimidating' routine. I just stood there, didn't react. I think I annoyed them more than anything. They didn't even lift a finger this time. I prefer being ignored to anger and being beaten. Besides, you know I'm not tough."

"…"

"What?"

"Nothing. Just… Never mind. Telling her to shove off was like fuel though wasn't it?"

"A little bit. But I love you for trying."

"Ugh! You're so accommodating!"

"I know. I get it from dad."

"Get mad at me already?!"

"Er, no?"

"Come on!"

"Masochist."

"Oh, you so know I could throw that, with extra special purgatory gooiness, right back in your face. In your EYE Mai. In your eye. Just putting that out there."

"I'm not that bad… am I?"

"If I have to roll my eyes one more time…You're totally that bad. You're the epitome of 'that bad'. And don't think I'm letting this go."

"Letting what go?"

"That you didn't answer my question."

"Oh. Back to that. Superlicious."

"Yes. It's unbelievably wonderful. Now answer the question Clarice. Do you see ghosts?"

"Of course I do."

"E-er, say what?"

"I thought you wanted an answer."

"I-I did, b-but-"

"Well, now you have it. Don't complain."

"A-ah-"

"Oh, one has been following you by the way. A ghost, I mean."

"Mai come on! You're kind of freaking me out right now!"

"I thought you wanted to know the truth?"

"I'm being followed?!"

"Yep."

"By a ghost?!"

"Yes."

"…Is he cute?"

"W-wait, what? You're only twelve!"

"So? Age is just a number in the romance department. Is he cute? I think I have a right to know about my personal hottie-ghost-stalker."

"What makes you think it's even a guy?"

"It isn't like any girl would follow me. Not in this town."

"Oookaay. Your logic is… unusual."

"And yours isn't? So who is it?"

"Well, you are right. It is a guy."

"REALLY?!"

"Really. He's tall too."

"And handsome?!"

"Mm-hm. With Tat's."

"T-tattoo's?"

"Skulls and Spades. He has a Mohican too. You know, one of those bright orange ones."

"A MOHICAN?!"

"Yeah, and every time I see him he's got this spooky look in his eyes and he's always carrying something sharp."

"…Mai?"

"Yes dear?"

"You're screwing with me aren't you?"

"Well you asked a stupid question."

"You total meanie! So you don't see dead people?"

"I see a lot of things Pei but 'dead people' has never been one of them."

How she could lie so well, alter the truth so fluidly into ambiguous, vague knots of unfathomable logic left Pei in a state of complete puzzlement. It wasn't the first time she'd done so. Revisiting the statement for the next five years Pei often wondered about it, over and over again until the same fearsome conclusion would ring in her ears, there to be relived during the night hours. Pei slept very well, but the prelude to sleep had, in recent weeks, lain in deliberation-inducing-mental-fatigue. Secrets tend to do that to people…

"Mai? Mai you should really eat something sweetie!"

"Mum as loud as you're shouting I still don't think she can hear you. Dad? What do you think we should…?"

"I've tried honey but she won't touch anything. It's as if she's… as if she's completely shut down. All she does is stare from wherever she sits. And I can't blame her a bit. I thought she'd cry but she doesn't even do that. I don't think she even hears us sometimes."

"But it's been days! Dad we can't just-"

"Pei-Pei, sometimes all we can do at times like these, is what we're already doing."

"What? Nothing?"

"No, not nothing. Caring. Waiting. Listening. Learning. Hoping."

"But… but it's just so…"

"Frustrating?"

"Yes! There's nothing we can do for her! We're just standing around here like useless- we may as well be mannequins for all the good we're doing!"

"And that's exactly why rushing in there and forcing her to say the things we all know need to be said may very well kill whatever is left of her. No one, no child nor man should have to face what she's facing. We're the scarecrows Princess, not mannequins. We chase away those who wish her more harm than the hell she's already suffering. We'll take as much of the… of the evil as we can, because with what she's going through we can at least keep away the trash that blows in around here. This isn't getting easier any time soon."

Their lives changed with the stroke of a clock hand. Pei hadn't had a clue of how the events would set the course of the future in such a way to leave them with a Mai they didn't comprehend…

"It's a joke."

"Mai I think we should-"

"-I mean two people; they love each other and have a kid together. They watch this child grow. They shower… unconditional love and affection upon it, despite its many flaws. And where does it get them?"

"Mai, this isn't-"

"No really, Pei, I want to know? Why would this world, or any, blame them for my existence? What creature would consider that reparation? They were perfect. I'm the freak! I'm the screw-up! I do nothing but cause other people pain! It's one big joke, so why isn't everybody laughing?! It's punishment isn't it? Mine. But they paid the price for it. So tell me. Why do I deserve any consolation from you? Why do I deserve even a little relief from this? Stop pushing it on me. I don't want it. I won't ever want it. I love this pain. It's all mine… don't take it from me."

Why?

It was all Pei could think; the fractured syllable echoing through her from the memory. Why would Mai think such things? Mai. The daughter of positivism and light. It wasn't as if she had had any control over… Pei hadn't responded or recognised any method of how to deal with a Mai of such bleakness, of such depth; darkness in which a kind of base understanding of how cruel and unbiased the universe could really be dawned visceral and ancient in those emerald eyes of hers. Of her sister in daily agony and actually wanting that anguish. Needing it like a paradoxical pain relief. It was as if she'd never known or had never before grasped at the one referred to as Mai Li…

"Isn't this what you wanted?! What are you all doing just standing there? Hurt me already! Come on! It's simple. You're bigger than me, older, stronger! You've got the knife, so use it! Come at me, it isn't that hard! Just one slip and there you go! Job done! It's easy! Kill me! DO IT! END ME! GET RID OF ME ALREADY! You don't want me here! I don't want to be here anymore! Stop lying to yourselves when the truth is so blatantly obvious already! You're all just waiting for me to trip anyway so what's the point of me even being here! …We both know that if you don't there will be nothing to stop me from showing you exactly what it feels like to be wrong for this world. Trust me when I say there's nothing I'd like more right now than to demonstrate on you."

The people in that town could be such pigs. Mai hadn't realised that her 'giving up' had been more of a fight for survival than an admission to sin. Pei could never admit to the panic Mai stirred up in her that strangled the chords in her chest…

"I'm so tired. Remembering is… painful. Dangerous. No matter where you travel on memory road it always leads you somewhere you don't want to go. Where you shouldn't want to go, but somewhere you can't escape nonetheless. A place that reminds me of how filthy I really am. Of how my life is an existence bought upon the existences of others. Stealing everything and returning… what? Nothing. I gave nothing back to them. Memories are brutal."

Or how Mai could sometimes and so easily scare Pei when she talked that way.

"I think Time is an illusion. An abstract concept created by humans: the great 'we' who couldn't possibly understand or accept the incomprehensible and fearful reality of the eternity of everything. Of how linear our mortality is. From what I've seen, at its base it's human's recognition of our lack of control over this, over the world and our obvious inability to change it that gave birth to 'time'. Every word is created in deliberate order by those who wish to own the world and curry favour with physics. 'Time' is our comfort zone, a salve and a plaster. A scapegoat. We made it the enemy… if we get rid of the idea then all we're left with is a void; a great chasm regardless of relativity, waiting to be filled with the futility that logic brings. No consolation. No warmth. No change. We are unable to adapt to our own existences and all because we created a tether for sanity. We hang ourselves with our own ineptitude. Hoist by our own petard. And that's why I don't get it Pei, it makes no sense. It's supposed to be neutral but it's completely violent. 'In time you'll move forward', 'It'll get easier with time', 'time is the great healer'… It's useless. It's all misery ravelled up in camouflage, in shiny wrapping paper. Empty words sprouting from the mouths of people who find it amusing to watch me try to survive my life, when I know they're all just waiting for me to call it quits, to see me fail. They don't understand a thing. I've already lost Pei… So what do I do now? What should I do now?"

…Or how she sometimes seemed another person altogether and render Pei feeling helpless and just a bit curious all at once.

Yes, remembering can be painful. Breathing long and deep through her nostrils, Pei's hands moved upwards to massage her fingers through her hair and over her scalp as she stared down at wood. Ah, when did my thoughts spiral downhill like this? I must be feeling bad…

Feeling bad…

Thoughts were complicated. Some dangerous and absolutely impossible to ignore; like a compulsive disorder. When you pushed them away they slithered on back reminding each and every human just how weak and absolutely needy they are. Guilt was amongst the strongest of roots to Pei's thought arsenal.

Guilt and Loneliness.

And all because she hadn't prepared herself for how much moving to Karakura had been just what the doctor ordered. At how it would bring Mai two steps forward instead of five steps back. The girl was practically blooming and it was all but stunning. Baffling. In two months the large town of Karakura had accomplished what she, her mother and father hadn't managed to achieve in almost four years. As humbling as that was it left a somewhat confusing, astringent taste in her mouth. It was unsettling. The changes were slight and slow coming but their fallout, their… fervour, was so obvious to Pei who had known Mai since both their diaper days.

It couldn't have been as easy as that. One quick move to the other side of Tokyo and BAM! Whole new Mai.

Recalling clearly the Mai of the 'yester year' with the Mai of today the internal differences were almost palpable.

When the Sohma's had made their final, thankful, sojourn from that pit of a town that had been their home for the better part of a decade Mai had been, at best, an indifferent shell of a teen. That impassive stare that Pei had spent years fighting and failing to tear down had held the weight and force of gravity as she'd phrased to Pei just how much it didn't matter to her whether she stayed behind or not.

As if she just didn't care either way. And she hadn't at the time, which had been obvious.

Mai's reasons were cold ones, but only directed internally, towards herself; aimed, Pei was sure, unswervingly to facilitate her own seclusion from the world.

So stupid!

For some unfathomable reason Mai had wanted to complete middle school. Why, for the love of god that was Pei couldn't possibly rationalise. It was school. To Pei the place was a dungeon, a prison sentence; as if it had been created solely to ensure Mai's personal hell on earth. A place where any person, be they adult or child could freely judge her without cause or reason. To cast against her a mirror of their worse selves. To blame her for everything. They didn't see a little girl: they saw a catalyst for their fears. At first Pei had figured Mai was endeavouring to prove herself as laudable and as potentially accomplished as the other members of her classmates, even if they weren't worth the freaking time of day to deal with anyway! To prove the school and all its members wrong. It was one theory amongst several. One could even speculate it to be a small act of defiance… but to Pei it seemed more of a self-inflicted isolation: a punishment embedded more in masochism, in its truest sense of the word than appropriating validation for her existence. She'd absolutely wondered at times whether Mai had possibly enjoyed the torment.

That's how little the decision had made sense to her.

No matter how Mai phrased it to Pei it sounded utterly stupid; the worst decision on a planet filled with bad decisions. And yet her parents had allowed it. Had nodded at it. Acknowledged it. Had replied to it with a definitive 'yes', ignoring the dumbfounded expression so appropriately plastered upon their daughter's visage. True, they'd argued with Mai over it but her reasoning and her eyes had proven impenetrable so they'd conceded to defeat. They would never dream of forcing her to submit; they weren't her real parents after all.

And then they had left her there.

Because that was alright, wasn't it? To leave a barely fifteen year old girl on her lonesome in enemy territory? For a year? How awesome a family we are.

Pei had left her there too… and far from quarrelling vehemently with her parents about it like she normally would have she'd remained unusually silent during the entirety of their trip to Karakura. She hadn't celebrated in the change of scenery, nor at the hustle and bustle of the many gloriously supplied superstores, supermarkets, open-markets and hypermarkets and fashion boutiques, she hadn't paid the slightest bit of attention to the more than pleasant atmosphere and the general suburban niceties that had been more than a little absent in their previous town.

All she could think of in her devastated daze was how Mai was missing it. On how she was all alone in backwards-ville. Admittedly Pei had never been much of a physical backup for Mai and truth be told Mai had rarely needed it.

Emotional backup however was Pei's forte and she didn't mind the limitation at all. She'd accepted years ago that she was the physical inferior to Mai in almost everyway and had fulfilled the boundless requirements for her self-esteem by simply being there when Mai had needed a friend. And she had, desperately, more than she had ever admitted. As egocentric as it sounded, for Pei, this had made her feel better about herself. Had made her feel necessary, indispensable. A prerequisite to her life: the only type of sister Mai could ever need.

Eventually, after months of freely giving the evil eye to just about everyone, everywhere, she'd come to realise the wisdom of her parents choice. It was in a letter she'd received from Mai about three months in. Of course Mai could have just given her a call but a whimsical, flight-of-fancy Pei had bought the finest, dandiest, most ridiculously cheesy stationary set (Care-Bears-Forever… need I say more?) before leaving and had all but demanded Mai make use of it. The girl had acquiesced for solace reasons and you never really say or admit to 'all' over a phone line anyway.

The letter had sounded a little… out of sorts.

As if Mai couldn't understand any more what she was feeling or why. As if the place she lived in no longer made sense to her. It had never made sense to any of us but Mai had always felt the need for loyalty, even to a place like that. Well, she soon changed her tune. Hah, I helped there. Every single time I visited. At first, whenever Mai wrote back each letter consisted of barely two paragraphs; half a page at best. But this letter had been a shocking side and a half of A4. So at the time Pei had begun to panic. However it was short lived; surging through Pei and vanishing as quickly as it had trespassed once she finished the correspondence, because it wasn't anything severe or any kind of perplexity that had driven Mai to write.

It was an acute listlessness.

She had been feeling bored.

Stunned, all Pei could do was bark a laugh at the letter. It was kind of foreign by for Mai to feel as such she supposed. A girl who had held, at the time, the most amazing, undoubtedly bizarre disposition of never suffering from tediousness of any form before (though that may be more from her having held no interest in her own interests, and not knowing what those interests are anyway) and who considered everything in front of her with near to the same amount of indifferent curiosity as Pei would a bird. She was maybe even lonesome, also possibly for the first time. Boredom tends to make the hidden aspects of a persons existence more obvious and it had puzzled the poor girl. Since Mai had never fallen prey to the usual after effect that comes with being by oneself; the psychological illusion, that trick involving an engorged exaggeration of spatial awareness where individuals feel as if they were standing in an empty field instead of a small area, such as an apartment.

Or at least that was what Pei had first believed.

Her father Jihi had thought differently.

"…she's just beginning to realise that she doesn't belong there anymore and that no amount of any self diagnosed flagellation will change that. Even punishments end at some point. There's a time and place for everything. Without us being there, without our presence to hinder any thoughts to her own welfare she can finally start to realise that change can also be a good thing."

"Thoughts to her own welfare? Mai?" Pei had snorted into her book. The impromptu lesson brought up by her father on the general history of Karakura having taken up most of her morning, manga was now her escape. "Mai wouldn't know what a selfish thought was if it came up and kissed her on the lips." Without warning a grudging giggle escaped her as she tried to imagine such a thing. "And she'd probably ask what it was doing afterwards and why it would even want to."

Which was more than a little sad come to think of it.

Thinking this Pei couldn't find it in herself to continue smiling. Instead she gazed down through the black and white illustrations on the double page in her grasp. "It'd be just like her, to question an act of affection. That girl's hopeless."

Her father had sighed; it was one of his more serious moments in time she supposed. "Everyone has selfish thoughts Pei. It'll just take time for Mai to unearth them." He gave a rueful shake of his head; blond hair swishing against his face. "But you're probably right. She's changed a lot since she was a young girl."

When hugs and kisses from Mai were once a daily ritual; an act of expression she didn't even need to think about first or explain, bestowed upon any who'd willingly receive them; a dose of medicine for the soul taken for granted by all about her. Until it was gone.

The letter had given Pei some hope. Some semblance of anticipation that Mai could one day be healed. Pei didn't wish nor expect Mai to return to the way she was as a child; to the sweet, cheerful, incredibly affectionate, and fearless, emotionally bursting, somewhat neurotic and absolutely moronic kid she'd grown up with. She held no illusions that one could return perfectly to the way they were. All she wanted was to view a 'Mai' without that weight on her shoulders; that constant burden, not quite self sustained, but there nonetheless seemingly covering her form and placing something older and untouchable in her eyes.

In a way Pei had more than received her wish for a lighter-hearted Mai. When dad finally brought Mai back with him for the April semester…

She'd been exceptionally, yet subtly, different. Not bad different but… something.

It wasn't even a something that Pei could describe, at least not with words but there had been a conspicuous adjustment to Mai. The more passive than active state of attention she normally gave everything she encountered was now less so and the air about her felt lighter. Curious even; as if she longed to, for once, see more and know more about the world. Much more so than Pei could remember and it wasn't the kind of brightness or glow that sunlight brought with its natural radiance. It was simply as if she'd cast something from herself.

Remembering clearly those bright green eyes as Mai had stood tentatively yet curiously in front of the Onsen tinted with a ludicrous anxiety, Pei had translated the look as a childish kind of fear that she wouldn't be welcome. Then Pei had bulldozed into her, quickly eradicating any and all thoughts on the matter. The unease on Mai's face had altered into simple happiness, something she hadn't seen there in quite some time.

Dad had sensed it too. Three hugs followed by another one when Mai came downstairs for dinner and another two before being smacked away by me and mum who'd been dragged into the last one. It'd had felt like Christmas and birthdays rolled into one. We'd spent so much time pretending we weren't missing something that the shock of being a complete family again had overtaken us.

Smiling to herself indulgently Pei shook her head. I slept like the dead that night. Like a kid completely safe and secure and content.

Mai possessed a surreal way of making Pei feel even more at ease than her parents ever did. She'd woken obnoxiously early, refreshed and joyously ready to go and annoy her younger sister; to sneak into her room and act like a teenage girl and receive the same behaviour back. It was a habit she hadn't entertained in… well, forever and it had felt like a gift.

And then there were the small acts of obvious assertion in Mai towards a determination for her to change herself. For one thing she smiled. She actually smiled genuine smiles, even if they were only one or two at a time or in a day. The stiff set to her form had disappeared and the normal emotional nuances that most girls reveal every day of their lives began to sprout heads and bloom flowers. Finally, Mai was acting like a teenager; a teen with obvious social ineptitudes but a teenager nonetheless.

And it was great and all, but like the slowest tide on an empty beach a wave of confusing apprehension had begun to gnaw at Pei's insides.

Of course there was also jealousy.

Unfortunately Pei was forced to realise that the most influential part of Mai's life now lay within the walls of her current high school. A place she spent roughly 60% of her life within and would do for the next three years. A pretty daunting amount of time once a person realises the difference. A place Pei was utterly excluded from. It was the first argument Pei had actually shown conviction with in about two years with her parents. But no matter how much she pleaded neither wanted her to attend Karakura First High School. It wasn't as if Pei had actually wished to attend a place where you were forced to sit in a class room and listen to a droning teacher go on and on about things you weren't ever going to use later on in life… for eight hours a day. She just hadn't wanted…

I just didn't want to be left behind.

By herself she just wasn't that interesting or that funny: boring in ways she was too scared to define. But it didn't bother her as long as Mai was near. A girl that made her feel worthy despite her limitations.

Pei hated herself for her selfishness, for her weakness. For all her happiness at seeing Mai finally move forwards, she, herself, felt that she was standing still. As if she hadn't progressed, whether that was even a factor or not. As if she observed behind a glass screen, as useless now as she had been four years ago.

Mai was crucial to Pei's happiness.

If she were sad, Pei was sad.

If Mai wanted the unattainable, like her father Pei would move heaven and earth to present the object of Mai's want (like she'd ever want anything or ask for anything) in as bold and melodramatic a manner as possible (because doing things the normal way was just boring).

If Mai were ever angry… she'd dive well out of the way for her and approve despite the results.

If Mai were happy then Pei wanted very much to be included, just a little bit in the feeling of it. However she knew now that Mai had been happy or at least comforted in places and moments in time that Pei could not claim witness to, which was a possible happening that could currently be taking place this very moment. She was missing out on parts of Mai's development that she'd promised herself she'd always be there for. It was an incredibly lonely feeling.

It wasn't fair.

But that is where the jealously had fallen into play. An emotion she resented and loathed yet fed every time its source popped up here there and everywhere else, ghost-like and as fleeting as it appeared to be. But as we all know appearances are bogus layers of self-suggestion and comfort.

Its cause was labelled Ichigo Kurosaki.

Just a boy. A high school kid. With fabulous orange, tweaked out hair. A scowl. Brown, auburn and amber eyes (was that even possible?). An evocative gaze. A belligerent disposition towards his peers, teachers, and discriminatory judgements based solely on any and all rumours in general. A kind nature hidden beneath waves of self taught scowls and a daily manicured attitude.

...As you can see, Mai's spoken about him once. Or twice. Maybe three times, but who's counting?

Mai Li spent more time, focused more energy, deliberated more fiercely and concentrated more vigilantly on that name and all it implied whenever it was spoken than she had ever spent on anything… ever. Or at least, in Pei's mind and opinion she did.

It was as if… as if Mai was so damn earnestly trying to gain the guy's friendship (what was so special about him anyway?) that when she realised she'd already received it, (and from what Mai had spoken on the subject) with honours, she had considered herself fifty thousand times more blessed than before. As if his friendship gave her more than Jihi, Chiyu and Pei did altogether. Pei knew this trail of thought led nowhere except moron-land. It was asinine: she had neither the right nor the reason to judge so harshly or think so viscously. But it didn't prevent treacherous words from leaking into mind whenever his name walked over Mai's eyes.

The girl spoke about him so minimally but with such honest feeling; new sensations verbalised in virtuousness…

It wasn't that Pei was angry at this Kurosaki guy.

More like the complete opposite. She was thankful that at least one of the boys in Karakura wasn't as blind and insensitive as several that Mai had had to deal with previously. He'd given her something she'd never had before and for that he deserved, in Pei's opinion, lifelong happiness and fulfilment.

She just wondered how on earth he'd managed to change her in so many small and ambiguous ways. In ways incomprehensible and confusing. In ways she wasn't and would never be involved in.

Pei had never heard of a guy so zealous over a simple friendship with a female. Usually… In Pei's experience the guy usually always wanted something much more than that. But this guy… Mai probably wasn't aware of how much detail she truly put into their night time discussions, which made them all the more enjoyable, true, but Pei was always left feeling way more confused than ever.

Ichigo Kurosaki sounded so… bloody… innocent! Completely without guile! He hadn't tried anything on with Mai and if how she spoke about him was true, and as thoroughly blind that Mai could be sometimes her perceptive skills where 100% on the ball, this strawberry guy… liked her. Without the expectation of more. A sincere 'like'.

Which made it sound all the more fishy to be honest.

Boys just aren't made that way! And that's another problem! I'm missing out on some serious potential, high quality male and female interrelation happenings! Numerous happenings here people! Maybe even Mai's FIRST happening! It suuuuucccckkksssss…

When she thought about it, Pei didn't need much. Just her family. A killer boyfriend would be nice too but that was all really.

…Even if it was a family full of lies.

Ooooh yeah. Big time.

She knew. She'd noticed that a long, long time ago. And it wasn't exactly very hard for her to figure out. I mean, I may come across as a total bimbo but I'm not dumb!

It was because she loved her family that she had managed to realise this. Being with them, her world is constantly filled with gratified, unconditional warmth that never seeps but cradles. A constant state of honest to goodness nuclear family lifestyle. Whenever the 'true lies' were spoken however there was a clear emptiness surrounding them. A 'lack' thereof of warmth. Fake. Counterfeit. Phoney. Look up a thesaurus people.

This discernment absolutely excluded Mai who, though she was, yes, a girl of many secrets… deserved the anonymity. There was never that emptiness in her words. In Pei's world secrets and lies are two very different things. Secrets are unavoidable but you don't lie to family.

Her parents were lying. To her. About her. Around her.

But I… I think it all centres on Mai.

The glances her mum and dad each seek in the other… the way the questions were worded whenever Mai was involved… that night when she came home and collapsed in front of the door, looking like death warmed over… the memory still echoed like a wraithlike haunting in her mind, she'd never been so scared. The images were still so fresh in her mind and probably always would be… because they were the start of the 'change'… the looks on mum and dad's faces… the glimpsed knowledge in their depths; understanding and a …something that was painted just behind the shine of silliness that her father normally projected. It had been lifted like the oppressing glare from a video projector.

…That light she'd seen flash so swiftly from the minute gap from the door of Mai's room had Pei moving fast for a quick second to check out the window for the lightning storm that she was sure had to be raging on out there.

You know…

Treat your thoughts like a Dear Diary anecdote. Mum always taught me that. When you are unable to express your thoughts and feel insecure, precarious even, about writing them down in a journal for fear of prying eyes or your own mental instability… then think them. Like therapy. Like meditation. There always for only you to revisit. So.

Dear diary…

Mai sees spirits.

The end.

Hmm… need a bit more than that.

I have no idea how to tell her that I already know. That I've known for a long while. And she's tried so hard to keep me out of it, even though I know that it doesn't bother me. Not even a little. It's the coolest thing on earth. And I used to think that the idea of being… being a psychic, a 'ghost whisperer' would be pretty risk free. But something I see in her face sometimes tells me there's so much more to it. These past few weeks… it's as if something's changed with her. After school or sometimes in the morning before breakfast she'd go for a twenty minute run. A few times a week she exercises. She'd always sweat afterwards and I found it really impressive that she took the time to remain as athletic now as she's ever been. But she doesn't sweat anymore after those workouts. It's like they don't even push her.

More than once I found blood on her clothes (when I ahem, quickly searched through them), so what's going on? I really want to know. It isn't like I'll judge her. Mai has always been special. I just want her to know she can trust me. That's all.

Huffing a long, loud breath Pei pushed against the desk before her; standing straight for the first time in half an hour. Think about it later Pei. Her back creaked and she thought for a single moment, considering the pro's of exercise and being as fit and flexible as Mai… Nah. Waaaaay too much effort.

She shrugged. Oh well. Yawning she stretched, arms lifting towards the sky and her eyes flickered towards the clock on the wall to the side of the desk. A frown rippled across her forehead. Mai should have been home by now; I really need to talk to her too before I blow.

A growl emanating from behind had her freezing on the spot.

Oh…

Arms locked halfway through their retraction to her sides she managed to peer as casually as possible, regardless of her crescendo heartbeat, behind her. Pei's gaze tracked down until they reached the floor.

Shit me up to the moon. "Oh mommy…" The whimper was barely inaudible as she stared down at whatever the hell scared her so much. Fuck-a-duck. Anything but that!

Another growl followed by a series of heavy breaths and one long snarling rumble had Pei scrambling out the doorway like a bat out of hell, a shriek dragged up from the core of her chest and ringing in her ears as the source of her fright chased after her.

.

.

.

.

.

Mai

I can't believe he did that. Kill me now. I'll help. With glee.

It had felt like the longest day in the history of days, since the very concept of 'days' was first founded. I should have felt tired but my feet continued to walk across the pavement towards home with an irrational tingle of what felt like surplus energy. The type that made my cells hum and dance in anticipation of the hours to come. The coming darkness.

Of what was to come I couldn't be sure… I had an inkling but that was all. Unfortunately my inklings were usually and bizarrely, spot on.

A cool breeze broke through the smooth heat from the sun and my eyes gazed out across the town without seeing much of anything at all. My feet may have been moving at light speed but my mind was on slow-mo rewind and pause. My teeth pressed down lightly, worrying my lower lip. I was entertaining the thought I'd attempted to stifle all afternoon: the one that still made a flush of heat race under the skin at my neck. Attempted and failed.

…Because I still couldn't believe Ichigo had chased me like that.

"GET BACK HERE! STOP RUNNING!"

"IF I STOP RUNNING YOU'LL KILL ME!"

"I'M NOT GOING TO KILL YOU!"

It wasn't so much the pursuit but the result of it that shocked, bewildered and threw me for a mountain sized loop of a mind screw. And my reaction only made the feeling worsen, spreading deeper like wild fire.

"THEN WHY ARE YOU CHASING ME?!"

"PUNISHMENT, DAMMIT!"

"OH LIKE THAT'S GOING TO ENCOURAGE ME TO STOP?! WHAT A GREAT MOTIVATIONAL EARNER! YOU'RE SO DEFINITELY GOING TO MURDER ME!"

Honestly, I hadn't considered for even a moment that he was the sort to tickle. 'Tickle' and 'Ichigo' didn't usually share breathing space in any sentence. Nothing could have prepared me for it. And I really had not thought that I was the type of individual who particularly enjoyed being on the receiving end of such resolute attention.

But tickle he had and enjoyed it I did. Was that weird? Is it okay? It is, right?

Probably feeling too self-conscious for my own good I blinked at the ground, lower lip pressing further into my mouth.

"HAH, GOT YOU!"

"CRAP!"

Oh boy. Boy, boy, boy, boy. My stomach churned and clenched at the memory; embarrassment trailing its fingers up over my jaw line to my cheeks. Whhhhhhy?

"SORRY!"

After latching onto my left wrist he'd used his shinigami knack for atmospheric manipulation, swiftly anticipating my attempt to shirk free to leap over my head, forcing me to twist around with wide, surprised eyes.

I wonder now what he had been thinking.

Diving upwards mere inches in front of me I'd stumbled off balance, which for me was a new concept. I've always possessed perfect stability in my balance. Four years of martial arts, eat your heart out. But Ichigo I'd learned had a tendency to do that to me. To knock me off guard. And he'd used it to force me off my feet with the lightest touch of his forearm against my collarbone.

I'd landed on my back with a surprised 'oof'. The shadowed area behind my lids had darkened further and I'd opened my bewildered eyes to the sky, seeking his face and some form of understanding as I'd been completely flummoxed.

And I'd found him leaning over me.

The only thought that had crossed my mind was that he was going to shout at me. Scream in my face. Get angry at me, finally, for the very first time, as he had every right, for getting his sisters involved. For making a hash of securing Kon at our school. Swallowing, my brows had pulled together into a worried crease and I'd peered up into sunlit brown eyes.

Then I'd blinked…

…Because I'd been more certain right then than I had been on anything in my life that Ichigo Kurosaki couldn't have been crouched directly over my body, a foot balanced on either side of me, like an overlarge crow. He'd been very close. His weight braced on his shins he was still gripping my left arm aloft in his warm hand. If he lowered himself just 2 inches he'd be sitting on top of me.

It had rendered me, for some reason, without thought.

So, uselessly, and as per the norm I'd simply stared. When I finally spoke I sounded flustered. "E-erm, Ichigo?" Regaining some control I'd managed to pose the next query, as if I were just mildly bemused. Well done me. "What are you doing?"

Yes. What had he been doing? In fact, what the hell had he been thinking?

"What am I doing?" Angular, orange brows had quirked; his infamous scowl thrown down at me, the noonday sun a milieu ahead of him.Surprise had halted him for a moment. Then with his head tilted slightly to the side he'd examined me before replying.

"I kind of thought that was obvious."

I'd quirked a brow thinking that, no, it hadn't been obvious at all. Very odd and inexplicable, yes. 'Obvious'? Not a chance.

Then that wicked, slightly manic smirk he'd thrown down at me, like a mark of conceited victory and masculine dominance had sent a confusing shiver of warning through the whole of me. And it hadn't necessarily felt… bad exactly. Different, but not bad.

"Now." I never imagined I'd ever describe Kurosaki's tone being lethal yet slinky. Almost like a panther… or a wolf. "Let's see how you're going to pay up."

Something in the area of my stomach had squealed 'proximity alert'. "Whu-uh?"

In comparison to my choked whisper his voice rang deep, almost piercing, carrying his smooth tenor above and beyond the call of necessity. A cocky overtone was inflected in his words. "You know what they say about payback don't you?"

Payback's a bitch.

Shit. Mouth open somewhat I'd felt an unusual surge of dread flooding my stomach. But, ha, that hadn't mattered since his right hand had crept down without my knowing it. The curious, slightly excited, anticipatory lilt to his eyes was my only warning (he was still smirking and being utterly infuriating) before I'd felt the tips of his deft fingers move with merciless intent at my waist line.

Mouth falling fully open I'd been beyond dumbfounded. Holy Christ.

I mean it wasn't as if I'd never been tickled before. Sure, it had been a while but I knew what it felt like. Ichigo tickling me however… I suppose that's what made it a little different…

"W-wait! What are you doing?" I felt him pick a route at a particularly sensitive area on the left side of my stomach atop of my school shirt and move with fast, quirky pressings. My words choked in my throat.

The sensation crawled through me and I stared at him in disbelief. My wide eyes shot down to where his right hand lay almost curved against my hip, his fingers teasing skin that was covered by what now felt like the flimsiest piece of cotton. Seeing it I felt my face flush and his face was rightthere! Watching me loose it like an utter moron, a pathetic rendition of what a normal high school student was supposed to react like. For some bizarre reason the idea of laughing, shouting, moving, anything at all in reaction… frightened me.

I actually didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to perform. Why did he revel in always being near when I was about to make a prat of myself? This was so mortifying! I know I'm inept at things most people consider quite normal but…

I bit down hard on my lower lip when he increased the pressure. It was irresistible. Don't loose it, don't loose it, don't loose it… Eyes squeezing closed my stomach muscles bent inwards reflexively; an inevitably failing attempt to prevent the feeling from drowning my senses. I squirmed beneath him and his hand actually pressed down, holding me still as his fingers continued.

Wha?! You-! Not fair!

Irrepressible emotion and hilarity rammed against my sealed lips. It came out, horrifyingly enough, as a whimper. His eyes shot up to my face. The usual rush of instinct surged into my legs and they moved harshly to throw him off. But he sank roughly to his knees and shins, circling my hips with his thighs, vicelike. Ichigo Kurosaki! I shot out with my free hand to wrench him off me, anything to stop him.

But he moved faster than I did; his hand breaking from my hip to wrap his fingers tightly over my wrist in one fast, skilled shock of heat and skin. A blur of movement which had me looking nonplussed at both my now locked limbs.

I… er… oh no.

Ignoring me (because it was so easy seeing as ever since time was conceived Ichigo had been born as my own personal purveyor, there to incur every possible humiliation onto myself for his own personal interest) he quickly lifted both my arms over my head, pressing the backs of them into the early summer baked concrete.

"What are you doing?!" My voice echoed out around us.

Glaring up at him, confused, strangely irritated, I saw that he didn't seem to care in the slightest. Well, great.

He wasn't the type to second guess his actions, not even for a moment and looked for all the world to see like he was just enjoying himself. At my expense. Brill-o.

Now, flat on my back, arms overhead and overly aware of the draft hitting my midriff I stared at him, transfixed, baffled, annoyed and panicked. The whole of him, you know, all fifty sodding feet of him, was perched adroitly and wolf-like above me: chest aligned with chest and, though not touching, something about it made me swallow aloud.

The thought that I should, oh I don't know, push up against him, say something of relevance, make a sound analogous to a dying cow perhaps and find the will to use the mystical 'force' even didn't, in any region of my brain, occur to me at first.

Maybe because I thought that he deserved to give vent to his anger and disappointment though this was probably the most bizarre way of ever doing so. I'd made a complete mess of things after all. But then again the idea that Ichigo would do something like this had never occurred to me to be well within the realm of possibility.

Or at least I considered that until he transferred both my wrists into one hand.

Craning to look made me realise, totally at random, just how large his hands were without them being preposterous. However seeing my own limbs trapped in just one of his reminded me that, yes, he had just rendered me helpless, something that went against everything I'd learned and developed thus in my life.

And he wasn't even looking at me anymore! Agh! His eyes and scowl were trained on my midsection as if it needed all his concentration. There was a strange expression on his face. One part smoky smile (if a smile could be smoky) and one part serious frown that didn't seem to know why it was there.

"You haven't laughed yet."

His was frank, almost absent-minded and I hadn't the words to respond. Having past many levels of surprised I couldn't hope to figure out how to. But his hand reached back down. Oh hallelujah he's going to continue!

Finally I pushed upwards against his one hand.

But it was like pushing up against a giant.

Crap! A moment of sheer disturbia filled my mind and my bewildered stare turned into shocked misgiving. I tried again and again, shoving against him, this time watching the expression on his face without shame of reciprocated scrutiny. He didn't even budge. His dedicated expression was as intent as ever. His eyes only flickered to mine once more and I was floored to discover a mischievous resolve flare through russet. The thinly veiled excitement I saw in them exploded into golden stars of wonder that broke through the honey coloured strands of his iris when he witnessed my effort to sustain a serious expression threaten to shatter completely. A laugh tried to tear its way from out of my gullet.

I'd previously considered that if someone were to do the things that Kurosaki does, despite him being outside of his physical shell, they would have to have considerable endurance. For him to literally run on air, to take heavy blows from hollows, to resist brick and stone all the while containing that incredible storm of reitsu Ichigo would have to be quite strong and endurable.

Yet, so confident was I in my own physical prowess I hadn't thought for a moment that in his shinigami form he would be stronger than me. I wasn't exactly using my energy but that wasn't the point. Maybe I was overreaching on this, I mean it wasn't exactly a problem that he-

"You're thinking way too much about this, you know that?"

I figured he was probably more than a little right about that but thoughts were meaningless when his fingers were doing the thinking and the talking for me.

Leaning closer his hands tightened over my wrists. "I can see it on your face; you're analysing everything." He sounded exasperated and a little breathless. "What's the problem?"

His hands quickened; it felt like I was being barraged by an assault of sensations. I felt laid bare. Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it… "I-Ichigo d-don't… s-stop it…" Control, control, control…

"Not a chance. Just let go for a second."

Trust me.

Did he say that or did I think it?

Eyes squeezed shut, all effort focused on the muscles of the almost painfully controlled frown at my forehead, I finally slipped. "Ah-mhha-AHAHAHAH-MU-UH WAIT-WAHAHAH-"

It broke free, ripped its way out of me. Freedom? Peace? Light-headedness? Joy? Fun? Like flying or falling maybe. To what I didn't know, but it felt glorious. I couldn't stop. I didn't want to and my body wouldn't let me anyway.

It was as if a pressure had existed; one I'd piled reams of emotional constipation upon and it was being forcibly rent from my ribcage. A harsh burst, an explosion of childlike happiness, an extremely LOUD cackle of surprised liberation, fear of exposure and confusion escaping me all at once.

The more I laughed the more adept his fingers seemed to become. He didn't stop and I got louder; it was that much more ticklish and it escalated with my reaction. As if he was learning with me just where to touch and push. It was like that final satisfying admission to sin. The more I laughed the tighter my chest became, hilarity pouring out of me like a wave.

And I heard his voice; his very male, very brash tenor and I think he was laughing with me. The sound was stunning: his voice was life and richness and desperate need. The warmth of a touch. The heat residing within passion. The sound of a person who regularly sticks out his chest in defiance to a judgmental world. Chocolate and spice and firewood. I'd never heard a more beautiful, more irresistible sound in my life.

Not that I could concentrate on it.

It was becoming difficult to breathe but I didn't care. I turned my face sideways into my shoulder; laughter doubling if that was possible. It almost hurt. The muscles in my jaw ached but mirth and smiling went hand in hand with the other so it was a lost cause. Awareness of curious eyes slipped silently into the back of my mind; I knew it was in the middle of the day where people were strolling but the release took away any and all insecurity for the moment.

Of course as no one could actually see Ichigo having at it I more or less looked like I'd lost my already fragile little mind. Giggling aloud and alone like an idiot on the sidewalk with my arms stretched beyond my head. I was surprised nobody had called the men in white coats, staying well away from the loon on the ground.

I was loud and uncontrolled, laughing in spits and spats.

Holding me down, he watched me the entire time.

Exposure.

Gah! My hand dove into my hair, practically mauling it, betraying the knots of frustrated embarrassment flooding the cells of my body. He'd seen… way too much of me today, more than I had ever hoped or wanted to have revealed to him.

But what made me speculate the most was just how much he appeared to want it. My fear, my unease, my joy. My secrets. To understand for some strange reason. I continued to wonder why but zilch came to mind except that he really was simply curious. It made me feel unsure. Shy even. And I didn't know why this was either; it seemed I didn't really know anything at all.

All I did know was that at both times when he'd exposed me to the world for his caprice he'd sat there and simply watched my breakdown. Crap-tastic. Watching, witnessing every crack of the mask, no matter how minute, as if each layer were important. Or alien. He was audacious and infuriating, like a wolf picking up a scent and following it to the root.

I felt a little raw, sort of like a nerve ending. Letting out a long exhale my pace slowed to a crawl and closed my eyes briefly…

Which was about the same time I heard the scream.

My eyes snapped open and I blinked alert, searching the area with a quirked brow. Pei?

I was only mildly concerned, only mildly, because at home a noise such as this almost always equalled to the most dumbest of dumb disputes between Jihi and Pei and it was always, always regarding one of three subjects: a) her appearance, b) her studies or c) the complex topic of sex.

Now C usually split itself into one of three categories: pregnancy, boys and a mix of both A and B. Jihi and Pei could wail at each other until the windows in the Onsen hotel's kitchen fractured. The Onsen staff were treated so much like family that whenever it happened they'd just leave them at it or, weirdly enough, offer advice which often ended with Chiyu being the referee. Only this time the sound was less melodramatic and more idiosyncratic.

I couldn't exactly picture a reason for why Pei would scream so loudly at her father. Of course there had to be a time where these patterns would differ. Frowning at the soft sound of fast, distant footfalls I felt that this would be one of those times. When I rounded the corner to the Onsen these patters turned into thundering stomps of freakishness.

Pat Pat Pat PAT PAT PAT PAT!

"GET BACK DEVIL DOG!"

Pei, what are you doing?

All of a sudden I witnessed Pei skid to a halt front the front door several feet from the front porch and then turn and run like the wind, rocketing towards me; an expression of sheer terror on her face. Head tilted sideways I stood watching at the west end of the building.

Had a heard of dinosaurs infiltrated the Onsen? Oh! A heard of Hollows?!

This didn't matter however when I got a clear view of her pale porcelain skin, her stress lined forehead and fear widened, almond shaped eyes; the look of a deer in flight of a ferocious carnivore before I caught her in mid flight as she barrelled into me. She moved away almost immediately and shouted once again in my face.

"MAI!"

Yes? "Pei? What is it?" I steadied her, hands wrapping around her elbows.

She dashed around me for some reason; diving behind my back as if hiding. I peered bewildered over my shoulder at her as her hands perched on my shoulders, head popping up next to mine. A finger lashed out and she pointed towards the open doorway.

"IT'S GOING TO EAT ME!"

Come again?

An afternoon shadow loomed across the pavement, protruding from the open door where I stared; its skewed form growing in size to resemble something quite bestial.

I frowned, leaning slightly, waiting as Pei's fingers dug half moons into my skin. My furrowed brows slowly rose as the shadow lengthened first then shortened forming a more defined clear silhouette until the creature at the very conclusion of the shape popped very cutely into view.

I stared at it, deadpan.

…What?

There sat what I was sure to be the tiniest dog I'd ever seen to exist (excluding Chihuahuas). It yipped and panted on the coloured flagstones and looked up at us curiously.

Yeeeeeah… I slumped and my school blazer fell down one arm as I exhaled, incredulous. Pei… I'd seen this dog the day before; it had arrived with one of the clients at our Onsen, a middle aged woman with the mind of a teen.

Pei didn't seem to notice the absurdity of the situation however. "See! It's stalking me!" She squeaked.

The apparent stalker let out a happy bark and a pink tongue slipped out to taste the air. "Yeah, I see what you mean Pei. Scary monster." I gave her a dry look.

She pulled back on my shoulders. "No really! It hasn't left me alone all day. It followed me into the bathroom! You know how much dogs freak me out!"

Yes, I did know and though I'd never understood it I'd respected it. Her fear wasn't rational and it wasn't based on any single past event. She just was. End of story. And sometimes that was all you needed.

For her sake I tried to bring a positive note to the situation. "It probably thinks your pretty. Is it a boy?" And this made sense in what world? God, I sucked at this.

"That's not the point!" Yes, I know, trust me, I know.

When her voice echoed down the street the little dog let out another contented yip. I think it wanted to play. With Pei. And her response to it was predictably over the top.

"YAHHH!" She roared, jumping up about five feet into the air.

On landing she hopped away from me; her arms shooting out flamboyantly and she assumed what I believe to be something approximating a flying crane pose. I arched a brow, wondering what she was doing. Producing a single clawed hand (she hadn't filed her nails) I watched her blankly, having no idea whether I should laugh or not.

She aimed her rigidly curved fingers at the relaxed canine. "I have claws. Beware!"

Looking at the puppy it blinked at her; soft grey fur shimmering in the afternoon light, a tail thumping happily on the ground behind it. I waited while absolutely nothing happened.

Birds sang.

An absolutely critical, couldn't possibly be ignored thought occurred to me, you know, because it's me here. "You know, it can probably sense your fear." I didn't smile, I swear to God.

Her head whipped to mine. "Not helping Mai!"

"It was just something I read somewhere: some animals know when you're afraid of them."

Her lip actually trembled. "Yeah and this one's taking advantage of mine. Look at it… sitting there… with its claws…"

Hmm. Those claws, if they did exist at all, were covered by small, moon shaped paws of pure lovability and were currently poised in such a way to make the pup's body look even more disarmingly charming than it already does. Shaking my head and ignoring Pei's hiss of alarm I took several steps towards the creature.

The puppy's ears immediately pinned back to the side of its head and its small dark eyes shot towards me, a whine of unease crawling fearfully from its chest.

I paused, looking directly at it. Its entire body tensed and a short growl threatened from its throat as it leaned backwards away from me. I took another step forwards and it shot off back inside the building, presumably to its owner, barking shrilly as it went.

I didn't move, just watched it go, feeling that odd pull in my chest: something like pain and nostalgia. Not a couple of months ago I wouldn't have been at all concerned by that. Now… it felt as if I'd just been slapped. Exhaling, I glanced back towards Pei, trying to smile but only managing a cheerless uplift on one side. "At least they don't run at the sight of you."

She'd already relaxed, peering at me with such care that I almost swallowed at the sheer echo of it. "Mai-"

I cleared my throat and shuffled on the spot. "Hey Pei? Can I ask you for a favour?"

She blinked. Then she brightened, cheery and bouncy in total Pei-style. "Of course you can! Anything for-OH MY GOD, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE?!"

Just like her father. Jerking back I smiled, her shout ringing in my ears. I opened my eyes, a brow arching but hers were practically glued to the side of my forehead: wide, focused and not so surprisingly angry. Of course, she'd seen my wound.

I almost face-planted. Wound. Right. I got hit in the head because of my ineptitude to control my own energy. Terrific. How not heroic. I'll go down in history as a total moron. "It's nothing Pei. Just an accident, I promise."

Her own eyes darted from mine back to the sore area of my forehead. "But-"

"I'm not being bullied Pei."

I could only assume the complete honesty of my tone forced her to drop her argument. Her hands grasped at mine. "Still I think you should get that looked at; it's pretty bad."

My tried shrug said exactly how much I cared about it. I swear I saw her eye twitch. "It doesn't hurt anymore."

She gave me a look and slowly reiterated me, obviously unimpressed. "It doesn't hurt anymore?"

But it really didn't so I nodded. "Really."

Her eyes rolled up to the sky. "Fine. What's this favour?"

"I need you to tell Jihi and Chiyu that I'll be late for dinner."

"You're going out again?"

There was something in her tone that made me stare at her for a second. I gestured towards home watching her. "Yeah; I'm just going to change clothes and then…" I searched the area for a decent excuse. "Go for a run." And came up with Bubcus. Yep. Good.

Her expression said it all. "You're going for a run?"

"Or something."

Both her black brows rose in unison. "And it's going to take two hours."

I gave her a blank look. "It's been a long day. Are they inside?"

"No, they're with a client."

"Right." Then I simply walked inside the foyer of the Onsen, heading past the reception area, waving towards one of the serving girls there before moving through the connecting hallway between the house and the hotel.

You know on the one hand I really hated lying to Pei. But on the other I considered it my duty to never tell her anything.

I didn't want to either. God no. I felt no need to include her in the eccentricities of my life. But the lying part of it though… For one thing I was supremely good at it (except when I wasn't). Even when I was lying about something nonsensical like going for a two hour run after school, on a school night. Who does that? Mai Li, that's who. But it was such a poor lie that it worked. She knew I was full of adrenaline and that my exercises had, as of late, been less than satisfactory for me.

She also knew however that I was avoiding talking to her about certain specifics of my life. I'd seen it in her features, more so during the past week.

Laying my uniform neatly on my bed I changed into an old pair of jeans and a simple black t-shirt with sleeves that settled at the elbows. It turned out Pei was still standing where I'd left her. Taking in her pose, one that reeked of anxiety, I slowed and stepped towards her frowning.

"Pei?"

She'd been gazing into the pavement but at hearing my voice she simply looked up at me, black hair shimmering in the afternoon light. "Mai you'd tell me if something was wrong, wouldn't you?"

Completely caught off guard my mouth opened and closed again.

"Pei…" Licking my lips felt almost mandatory at this point, as did the swallow. "There's nothing wrong, I swear." God, I really hated lying to her. I was perfectly capable of keeping my secrets and more than comfortable with not sharing them (though a certain orange haired soul reaper could probably gainsay this fact but for now I'm going to utterly ignore that). You could say I'd gotten used to the isolation. But…

Pei didn't have many people who trusted her as completely as I declared myself too and I was beginning to realise just how much I was reneging on my end of the deal to always tell her the kind of things you just couldn't tell the grown ups. The words 'Pei, I see ghosts and other creatures of supernatural lore' were constantly on the tip of my tongue. It went against everything I had inside me but there it was. With what right did I have to bring her, the colourful flower, into my world of blacks, whites, greys and blood? None at all. It wasn't happening.

Dark eyes searched my own and an apprehensive frown culminated at the bridge of her nose. But then she nodded, trying to smile with closed eyes. Feeling at a loss as to what was suddenly making her feel so unsure about the world my hand came up and, not quite sure what I was doing, I hesitantly put my fingertips lightly touching Pei's cheek and her eyes opened.

For one fast second she looked like she was on the verge of tears.

A silver flash erupted in my mind. My ribcage seized. And underneath the sensation a river of something that felt like a hot amalgamation of pure rage and self-loathing followed. Before I could suffer a massive pulmonary she gave me one of her mountain-bear hugs, pressing my arms against my sides.

"Calm down Mai, I'm fine so stop looking like I've just been run over or something."

I closed my eyes. "That's not funny Pei."

"It wasn't meant to be: you always look so in control of yourself but your eyes give you away. You looked like you were having a stroke or something." My shoulder muffled the snort of laughter that spilled out of her and I heard her mumble something about an 'overreaction'. She was probably right.

Chest loosening, my eyes remained closed.

"Mai?"

"I'm sorry."

Pei pulled away from me quickly, her eyes questioning mine as they slowly opened to study her. "I… I don't mean to keep things from you. I wouldn't even know where to start."

I smiled at her, carefully, gently but rather than it encouraging a state of acceptance and comfort it only succeeded in exacerbating the frustrated shine that screamed unanswered questions in those opaque pearls of hers. I wanted so much to make her feel better, to do the right thing but I had no idea how to.

But even as I tried to she rolled her eyes again and waved a dismissive hand. "Go. Run. Get it out of your system. But later we'll-"

"Talk about it?"

"Damn straight!"

I think we both knew that there wouldn't be any kind of talk later.

I was such a… such a chicken-shit. Yes. That was it. It didn't matter that I was lying to protect Pei or that I didn't even want to tell her, I still felt like an enormous chicken-shit.

.

.

.

.

.

Pei

Pei felt as if her spine and all the courage she'd built up in it had been dragged off, quite willingly, with a hop, skip and a jump with Mai as she ran off in those cheap jeans that Pei absolutely hated to see on a girl who could easily afford a whole wardrobe of ultra tight denim's.

For I am spineless. She grunted; face scrunched up in self-annoyance. And such a chicken-shit. Slumping where she stood a groan slipped free of her. "Pei, that was truly pathetic." So much for sitting Mai down and unveiling the big secret.

"I… I don't mean to keep things from you. I wouldn't even know where to start."

Mai… she was so used to keeping everything to herself that she literally couldn't verbalise those secrets of hers. Pei didn't want to force her to either but then… but then I just go and emotionally manipulate her with my own insecurity issues like a dependent toddler. Way to go.

But what else was she supposed to do when her cousin/best friend/sister arrives home looking like she'd had a serious run in with a tire iron? It brought back not-so-pleasant memories of other injuries Mai had once come home with.

…I wouldn't even know where to start.

Her exhale was long. "I know where I'd start."

.

.

.

.

.

Kurosaki Household

There was something to be said about the home, something most teenagers could relate to. Its nature comforting, being possibly the only private, safe abode for one very specific boy after a long day of fighting hollows, dodging the shrewd, intrusive questions from your bewildered friends and wanting to and on occasion actually carrying out the satisfying urge to strangle your substitute soul alter ego.

For Ichigo Kurosaki it should have been the one place he could relax. And yet…

Every day. Every freaking day.

"Ichigo…" God did that voice grate on his nerves. "It is time."

Time for what?

Tetchy brown eyes took in the man before them.

I'm too hungry for this. I missed lunch today and I'm not in the mood to deal with you old man.

In a dramatic pause he watched as his dad took a breath. This is so stupid. Head bowed, he opened his arms wide to his son. The invitation was completely unwanted. A part of Ichigo even shrivelled up on the inside at the action. The pantomimed solemnity and a touch of his father's own personal histrionics all chocked up into the, er, persona of someone actually emotionally attentive to his kids proving that his thought system must be as profound as his love for them. Must be. Yeah, right.

Ichigo almost threw up at the thought, the muscle beneath his eye twitching. All his father needed now was a spotlight on cue. Che. If I were even a little bit lucky it would set his hair on fire. But, since I'm shit out of luck…

"The day has come." Oh has it? Isshin's tone was so reflective Ichigo almost missed the saccharine mischief, the wilfully stubborn-sheer-stupidity and superciliousness laced beneath it. Almost. "You've come to that age boy…" Head shooting up he looked at his son all sparkly-eyed and anticipatory of victory; no conceding defeat here, no sir! "Show me what you can do my son!"

"No."

"WHY NOT?!"

Loud. Eyebrows pinched together at the bridge of his nose Ichigo tried not to grind his teeth together. Screw the eye throb, he was too far gone. I swear he's gotten worse.

"Dad, give me a break already." His bag slipped free of his shoulder landing in a flump on the floor beside the kitchen archway, right where his dad had forced his sudden, five second self-inspired realisation upon him. "I've only just walked through the front door!"

Not. Today.

But his dad wasn't paying any attention to him. What a shocker. Instead he stood there baring his chest like a giant, bumbling, man-ape-gone-wrong-thing. "I'm right here, open and willing! Take me down boy!"

Just get out of the freaking way already. "Seriously dad, I'm not it the mood." Hungry. Food. Need now. Not kidding. "I'm just going to get a snack." Before I actually loose it and bite my own hand off.

"Good men are always in the mood! They ignore physical urges!"

Like he actually gave a crap. "I suppose that just means I'm not a good man." He pretended; his tone flippant.

"But bad men never turn down the chance to fight, to show off their prowess!"

Where did he even get his info? "Like I even care!" He tried to edge around his father but Isshin moved into his path.

"But you should!"

"Well I don't! Everything you say is ridiculous!" Fists clenched Ichigo straightened, a brown glare aimed at melodramatic black, a vein pulsing. I will not head butt my dad. I will not head butt my dad.

A wide, teeth gleaming, championship grin spread fast across his dad's jaw, a hand lashing up, finger whipping forwards to point in his son's face. Ichigo scowled at it as if it were contagious. "Hah! This just proves that you can't do it!

Ichigo smacked the finger out of the way. "Can't what? Beat your head into the wall?! Because it'd be a pleasure right about now! Really!" A loud growl emanating from the region of his stomach had him remembering that now was not the time to be a slave to his father's nonsensical whims. "Ah, screw this: I'm freaking starving!"

"THEN COME AT ME!"

"I SAID GO AWAY! HUNGRY!"

He swore he saw his dad's leg twitch and shift as if he wanted to stamp his foot on the floor like a toddler. "DO IT OR YOU WON'T GET ANY DINNER!"

"WHAT?!" What is he, ten?! More veins sprouted, livid and protruding at the dozen across Ichigo's forehead. "THAT'S NOT FAIR!"

"IT IS TOO FAIR: NOW COME AT ME!"

"I WON'T!" His arm slashed through the air in emphasis, not that it would dissuade his father whatsoever (if wishes were horses). "NO MATTER WHAT YOU THREATEN, I WON'T! I WON'T EAT ALL NIGHT IF I HAVE TOO! SO TAKE IT AND SHOVE IT!"

He turned his back on his father and started stomping towards the stairs.

"HAH! You won't survive: Kurosaki men need nourishment!"

"Well I guess I'm just special!" He shouted childishly over his shoulder, sweatdropping at how much his father looked like an enthusiastic puppy. You could practically see the tail wag.

Then his father grabbed his shoulder and whirled him around, his overexcited forehead pressed against his. "That can't be determined until you face me!"

"I face you every single day dammit!" He wouldn't give in. For once no matter what he wouldn't-

"Then it shouldn't be a problem!"

"But it is!"

"I said do it!"

"No!"

"DO IT LIKE A BOSS!"

"ENOUGH ALREADY!"

It was automatic. Nobody would blame him; then again nobody he knew had a father like Isshin Kurosaki. Or at least he didn't think they did. And as he'd made it very clear: it had been a long day.

So he stepped forward, wrapping a taut arm swiftly around his dad's waist for a brief second-

-His arm wrapped tightly around her middle, lifting her momentarily off the ground. Immediately he felt the stunning amount of muscle pressing against his arm. And he heard her quiet gasp of surprise as he all but crushed her back into his chest and moved, saving her, saving himself, saving them both. Taking, securing.

She fit. The thought was brief and confusing and he ignored it. But its wake was deafening and made him scowl further.

Awareness could be blinding-

-Only to hurl the idiot he called father like a bowling ball into the adjacent wall.

"OW!" Nose squashed into the wallpapered brick a noise analogous to a very sad whistle sounded from his nostrils. Like a sack of potatoes Isshin crumbled to the floor, sliding down the wall, parts of his body hitting the ground in thuds and plops. He lay there prone and inept.

Ichigo paid little attention to him. Instead he stared unblinkingly down at his right hand.

Lost in thought.

"This again."

Karin. Appearing in the doorway behind him she checked over the sight of her dad who remained unmoving. A twitch, larger than the scope of her forehead practically twanged at the sight. This was becoming an everyday occurrence. Lame. Being pretty damn magnanimous in her opinion she swallowed down the feeling that her dad was all but troublesome and useless and ridiculous and embarrassing even on the best of days and turned to shout back over her shoulder. "Yuzu! Dad did it again! Just three for dinner tonight!"

And just like that the man was back on his feet; his funk over with (no one gave a crap anyway) he flipped forwards with the flexibility of a spider. "Not so fast Karin! I'm in perfect condition!" Smug steam shot out of both nostrils followed by a healthy dripping of blood. He floundered and tried to wipe at the stream surreptitiously on his very white sleeve and failed, being pretty bloody obvious about it as he folded his arms, attempting to prove some kind of point. Red covered everything.

You could practically see the dot, dot, dot of utter speechlessness reign clear over Karin's head. Smooth goat chin. "Yeah… tell that to the broken nose."

"Hah! It isn't broken; it always looks like this!"

"It always looks broken?"

"Yes!"

"Right." As if she'd expected anything more intelligent.

"And I landed that way on purpose."

"Really dad? 'Cause it looked like he threw you pretty hard; your nose looks a little… fractured. And you're wheezing. And there's a bruise coming up under your eye."

There was a full three seconds of silence.

Isshin narrowed his eyes.

Karin stared dully back.

Eventually he grumbled. "It can't be proven."

She rolled her eyes.

Flexing his fingers Ichigo ignored the two of them and their background noise as they moved past him and through the doorway. He'd thank Karin later for the timely intervention.

Currently though he was too fixated.

His hand dropped back to his side and he stood there for a full two minutes in silence. Eventually he shifted, walking back in the direction of the stairs. He needed to be by himself. Frowning he pushed against the wall, taking two or three steps at a time, knowing that dinner wouldn't be for another hour anyway and realising that all thoughts of food had quickly left him.

Since his mind kept going back to it...

He heard the howl of the hollows as they fell, slicing unerringly through one of them and only feeling the weight against his zanpacto as it died and burst free, the soul finally at peace. Both he and Mai slid back together, fast and easy and he realised how the earlier worry that had been screaming in his skull until just moments before had quieted. But not the anger. Not the surprising tension of it or the incredulous tilt to his temper.

Weaving they came to a stop free from falling hollows.

Huh.

It hit him randomly how small she was. Between them there were just a couple of inches in difference but physically he was much broader. Well of course, it was a given; he was a guy. In general guys were broader. But it still surprised him for some reason.

Every pant from her mouth raised her back; he could feel it against his chest. It was in sync with his own though they'd barely done anything worthy of the effort. He watched distantly as each hollow struggled to stand up amidst the dust and dirt that had billowed. To the side he saw Rukia trying to pry the Mod Konpaku off her chest. He sweatdropped: the mod soul was blushing like a happy little moron. The expression looked so surreal on his body and he felt like bitch slapping the pair of them as 'Kon' wheezed when one of Rukia's punches hit its target near his crotch.

He stifled a groan; his eyes closing in annoyance, teeth grinding. He'd already resigned himself to the idiot's idiocy but the worse-than-Keigo-like-perverseness was starting to ire.

Opening his eyes again he let out a breath and it stirred the loose strands of dark hair at the nape of Mai's neck. It drew his attention there, his brown eyes growing contemplative.

He was still angry. He could feel the emotion bubbling slowly and dully up from his stomach. It was a sensation that had been drenched in fear. The back of his shihaksho was now clinging to his spine; the sweat had formed quickly as he'd tried to make it in time.

And it had only served to make him all the more livid.

The life and colour in each strand…

She… she could have gotten herself killed, the freaking doofus! What was wrong with her? Did she have no sense of self preservation? Sure, just corner yourself with a couple of dozen hungry hollows all thirsting for your super energy!

Without telling it to he felt his arm tighten slightly around her middle, as if he were fighting for composure. For calm. He demanded the chronic panic, the rebuilding fear invading his mind to disappear. It came from somewhere dark. It was encompassing and completely without reason and he crawled up from that pit, fighting to separate himself from it. He was probably overreacting.

Yeah. Rukia thought so too.

But he almost hadn't gotten there on time. The thought at what could have happened had he arrived even a couple of seconds later… he knew she could handle herself, handle herself well but…

He was the soul reaper, not her. It was his duty, not her responsibility and yet… god, he wanted to shake her so bad and was surprised that the sheer strength of the feeling hadn't turned to heat, that his eyes hadn't seared her hair. She had to have felt it.

By how still she was he figured maybe she had.

Closing his bedroom door he leaned back against it and, head softly thudding against the wood, closed his eyes.

Damn.

Yeah, he got it already. He knew; she was his friend. His best, regardless of long he'd known her or how much time they'd spent getting to understand one another. He supposed that it doesn't always take years. It could take days and it could take minutes. And it had been easy. He felt comfortable telling her things… things he would or could never say to someone else. Not to Tatsuki, not Chad, not his sisters. Things he entertained frequently. Things he'd had to swallow back before he blurted them out. The only obstacle ever stopping him from doing so was Rukia who, previously, had explained how it could completely screw up a person's life to know about soul reapers and such. And his own ineptitude when it came to explaining things didn't help.

But now we know she knows. The dynamic had changed. And words were coming easier when speaking with her.

So yeah, he understood why he'd reacted the way he had.

But it didn't explain, not even a little bit, why the absolute freaking shit he'd thought it would be such a fantastic idea to tickle her to death!

Dammit! He'd tickled his friend; it even sounded weird!

Forcing his eyes to open once more he threw his scowl at the ceiling and tried swallowing down the heat gathering at his cheeks. Just… great. What else could he think? Why did he do it at all? And now he couldn't take it back! His lips pressed together in an agitated line as he mulled it over.

It's normal right? To want to…

That made it worse; that a part of him didn't think it was weird at all. He'd never wanted to tickle Tatsuki before. Or Orihime. Michiru. Rukia. Or Kirimi (a girl from middle school).

Eventually, feeling no less disconcerted, he bowed his head low to the floor, staring hard at the carpet as if it held all the answers. Nothing there helped and a frustrated frown began to mar its way across the skin at the bridge of his nose. He allowed the question he'd tried to ignore and yet subsequently managed to think about throughout the rest of the day drift again to the forefront of his mind.

What had that been about? The whole thing…

-He quickly lifted both her arms over head, pressing the backs of them into the early summer baked concrete-

Just what had he been attempting to do?

Gaze fixed on a spot on the floor near his sock covered feet he wondered. And yet… it wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been. For him. Thinking on it now he supposed that, at the time, he should have been astounded at where his thoughts and his actions had taken him.

But all he'd wanted…

Raking a hand almost violently through his hair his insides folded in on themselves. Mortified. But his in-built defiance to any societal, peer related norm forced his brain to reveal to himself that all he'd wanted, really, was to just…

He let out a breath. Don't be a pansy.

He'd just really wanted to see her laugh. That's all. To see her smile about something, freely and without cost, about something… something he'd caused.

To let go. To trust him with that, even if only for a second.

From what he'd seen he figured that if Mai Li was anymore shielded she'd be steel. He could practically feel the indifference, the lack of self value she placed on herself at times. The natural way she simply skimmed past herself and onto others, though her curiosity was a monster in and of itself. And she smiled, true. Smiles that made you look at her.

But her smiles showed nothing but gratitude. As if she was constantly thanking the world itself for accepting her. Which was weird. Just for once he wanted her to smile, to laugh and for it to be completely selfish. Just for her.

He'd seen Tatsuki laugh in that totally 'I'm tomboyish but want to be considered girly even though I know I like being seen this way' kind of way. Orihime laughed like it was for free and it was; it was something he admired about her. He could only picture insanity clanging in the minds of both Mizuiro and Keigo as they cackled and chortled about endless reams of crap, dreamed up to annoy him and only him for eternity. Just thinking about Rukia's self-important laugh made his hackles rise on end. Chad… Have I ever seen Chad actually laugh? Well there was that one time… Dude. Not good.

His dad, his sisters, they all smiled and laughed like all normal people regardless of their idiosyncrasies.

So why couldn't Mai?

What was she paying for?

-His hand crept down her side, tracing a path near her hip bone and searching for that ubiquitous tickle spot-

Shit. His eyes snapped shut, fingers twitching, still tingling it seemed, stop thinking about it! It's not gonna help!

-Pressing deeper, pushing, forcing, feeling the warmth of her skin through her shirt. Revelling in her loss of control as she squirmed and knowing the inevitable outcome would be sweet.

His fingers closed into a ball and he pressed his lips together, inhaling through his nose, remembering.

And then she laughed. Damn, it was like a sucker punch in the gut. Strong, unbridled, full of heart and feeling. He watched her, fascinated, as she'd tried to hide her face and realised that he was laughing too, pulled in by the utter freedom of it…

…Acknowledging the coiled excitement deep within himself at being able to bring that kind of response out of her, out of someone so in command of themselves. That tightening at knowing the eventual outcome, knowing that no matter how hard she fought him he would succeed. She'd have to let go.

The CONTROL.

Shit.

It was almost painful to open his eyes again; the strain on each lid felt weary and shameful as he stared back upwards at the ceiling in silent retrospection.

Yeah… things he shouldn't want. Made sense.

Making her laugh had made him laugh. He hadn't tickled his sisters in years.

Deliberately exerting control over her should have made him feel like a dick but he couldn't bring himself to regret it. The whole thing should have been harmless. With anyone else it would have been but with Mai it had felt different somehow. Contentment had stolen over him at the end, pushing away at the world and dampening sound.

When he'd finally let her go he hadn't stood up or stepped away. Instead he'd rolled off her to lie on his back next to her curled up form, staring up at the sky. He'd felt tired. She'd covered her head with her arms but he could still hear the odd giggle, like uncontrollable spasms of delight. He remembered smirking.

"I haven't laughed like that in years." She'd muttered under the shelter of her arms, voice muffled and still breathing erratically but also happy and embarrassed.

He'd blinked but believing every word he muttered what he would later realise to be probably one of the dumbest questions he could have asked right then and there.

"Why?"

"I don't know." It came out hushed, quiet; a whisper. Not rushed but also not revealing anything. If anything it felt blank.

He'd had no idea of how to continue. She was still closed off, her barriers whether she was aware of them or not were raised high. But they weren't nearly as high as before. It made him realise he'd accomplished something.

It had only started anyway because Mai had come to the conclusion that he would be angry at her for something that was completely his fault. Again: doofus! He'd asked her to practically baby-sit the psycho pervert inhabiting his body. Sure he'd been beyond consolation for a second but only for a second; his sisters may have seen him but anything seen could be explained away anyway. Thankfully.

And there was still that other thing.

That vision.

That visceral second when he'd touched that thimble of Mai Li, stretching into a conduit to eternity at the base of a foreign connection. Where he'd seen… whatever it was that he'd seen. He wasn't sure if he should ask her about it. It sounded like something out of the Twilight Zone. How would he even word it? Why would she even know what it was anyway? Maybe he'd suffered a hallucination.

Or maybe Mai was something else.

"Mai, I'm trying to tell you that you're not necessarily… as bad as you think you are. There's nothing scary about you."

…A soft smile. "I think I'm actually improving at this."

She was definitely a mixed personality. Some days Mai was light and confident with an air of dry humour. As if the manner she possessed was something she'd learnt, developed and thought 'yes, this will do'. Other days… she was serious. Extremely empathetic. Soft. He wondered if this was what she was really like on the inside. A guy could drive himself nuts trying to figure it out.

Eventually he found himself sitting on his bed and looking out the window.

Rukia had left him earlier to scout out a way to give the substitute - to give 'Kon' - a way to co-exist with them. A way to be mobile without them. As much as Ichigo wanted to throw the idiot away it was only a transient feeling; the guy deserved some sort of chance.

Later, when the sun had moved closer to the horizon he returned downstairs to the kitchen and was met with a pair of curious blue eyes.

"So Ichigo…" Karin began, chopsticks already in one hand as the other cradled a bowl or rice. "Who was that girl today?" Her tone was endearingly clueless.

Say what?

Beside her Yuzu spoke up, serving plates balanced perfectly on one arm. "Oh yeah! That girl!" She looked at him expectantly as if what she said had cleared up everything.

Some useful information would be real good right about now. (Note to audience: Ichigo can at times be a slow processor whether he's impeded by his stomach or not: end note).

"Er, girl?"

Karin shrugged, genuinely looking for an answer. "Yeah, you know, brunette, green eyes, kind of weird-"

"Karin!" Yuzu hissed.

She blinked, baffled. "I said weird, not bad. Just weird. Kind of like Ichigo."

He sweatdropped. Gee, thanks sis.

Her eyes flickered back to Ichigo who stood rooted to the spot like an old tree, staring at her. "Who was she? Your friend?"

Oh…

Mai. Right.

And out of nowhere and he really should have seen him coming (che, 'prancing') a certain mentally constipated, sorry excuse for a man never mind a father boinged into existence right in front of Ichigo's nose.

"Girlfriend?! You have a girlfriend?! WHEN?! HOW?!"

Great. Ugh. Just ignore him and say they misunderstood or something-

"You couldn't possibly have a girlfriend; you're totally and completely gay!"

The twitch returned. On second thought…

.

.

.

.

.

Mai

Our short conversation stayed with me as I walked away from the Onsen. Pei's voice, her lonely smile, how she'd clutched at me…

Okay. Deep breath. Let it out. Look up.

The skyline was a stunning display of blue and yellow. I was reminded all over again how lucky I was to be living in such a forgiving place as Karakura. Summer had begun so nightfall was already lagging a little behind the times. Sunset wouldn't be for a little while yet.

I gazed unseeing amidst the crowd. Hands in my pockets I strolled through the town, following the trace of their scent, their energy. It disturbed me slightly at how familiar it felt.

They burned hotter than I thought they would, you know. The yokai.

True, I'd discovered from the few, short moments I'd felt them that their presence could be described at best as a chill; an echo etched in ice. A kind of savage ache. But it was a coldness that devoured the spine, one that nipped and tore and whispered its teeth through the fleshy layers of the heart and mind, rendering victims senseless and useless. It could freeze you; make a person the most vulnerable of targets. It related to intense fear.

But the undercurrent…

Yokai reeked of pain: a madness that wasn't, in general, a cold source of energy. And this type of pain was, in the broad-spectrum of things, wrought by violence. Such concentrated hostility, their purpose a principal that seemed to run deep; continuous and thundering and poorly concealed in the mutated blood flowing through their veins. Violence was a silent scream of pure power for it didn't require the use of words or the effect of sound in its practice. And violence could be portrayed as a form of passion.

It was darkness. And it generated its own light.

That's what I felt, the very resonance of it filtering through the air to hover between spaces.

It led me, strangely enough, to the entrance of one of the many (if not one of the largest) underground car parks littered throughout the town. The type that stretched up several stories and made use of by corporate employees, salesmen and property owners. It stood adjacent to several restaurants, book stores and office buildings and around the corner from a large manufacturing block. A side entrance could be found in the shadows of the street corner, shielded from the on-goings of the general populace.

There I found Urahara, standing serene and patient against the stone wall next to the door. His hat shadowing his eyes, cane resting against his shoulder with its tip pointing northwards and the whisper of a smile tracing his face he shifted his head just a touch in my direction. "Well Mai, fancy seeing you here."

A small smile lifted my lips. I'd informed him earlier of what I'd sensed, immediately after lunch had ended and I was back at school. He'd replied with an affable 'alrighty then' and proposed to meet at my earliest convenience or wherever I found them.

…Because he wanted to take a gander.

However, what I hadn't expected to see, in what was clearly one of the genius's less than bright moments, a Guinness record I was sure for pure 'stupid', a claim highlighted and ensconced in bold capitals (for god sakes), was the wonder twins: the miniature gangster and his curtain fringed, uncanny eyed sister who were standing guard down by his feet.

Immediately I zeroed in on them. My left eye twitched. Disbelief coursed through me.

Ururu looked, as per the norm, completely and impressively unconcerned about the prospect of facing down some Yokai. She was examining the sky as I had earlier with about as much interest as a person would watch paint dry. Yet I was pretty sure I caught those large pupils of hers tracking things only she cold see. But Jinta…

The kid looked like he'd scored the lottery instead of what would be, for most people, a one way trip to loony land. I mean he was about to traverse gaily into what could possibly be a Yokai den. The image of a dozen hungry, snarling yokai bearing down on him made my stomach churn and I stared at him, my expression begging him to be like a normal kid and scram back home… watch some television… go to bed… drag Ururu with him and curl up on the sofa… anything.

Yet what I received was probably one (cough 'Pei' cough) of the biggest eat shit grins I've ever seen. A cool 'Sup' if I ever saw one.

I shot a look towards Urahara for what I'd hoped to be a decent explanation, preferably that the two were simply accompanying them (Tessai stood stooped behind them, further in the shadows) outside for ice cream. "Please Urahara, for the love of Jesus Christ, tell me you didn't sanction for them to be on this hunt with me?"

But obviously the adult in front of me had been smoking crack during my absence. "Mah, don't worry about it. They need the practice."

They need… the practice?

No.

No!

I think my eyes said it all. "Kisuke, why?! They're children!"

Jinta looked outraged. "Hey! I'm ten: that's two whole digits!" His teeth were practically gnashing beyond the scope of his lips.

But the whole of my attention was placed on the green kimono clad Shouten store owner in front of me who'd chosen to finally stand straight, lifting away from the wall and stepping towards me. "Mai, please relax. They need to be here."

His tone left me frowning. For a man who could be as a infantile as the children behind him I knew, even after only knowing him for a short time, that he behaved as such because he was a man who knew enough that he had be that way. His business was protecting the souls of the general populace of Karakura. When his tone took a turn for serious… I had to listen. There was no choice. "I don't understand."

"Yokai aren't creatures who discriminate their prey." I knew that… but I hadn't thought of it just yet. "Young, old, adolescent, male, female, boy, woman, wife, son, it doesn't matter to them. Everyone is a viable target."

I nodded, expression open yet inflexible, listening, studying him…

Seeing this he took a step closer, cane swishing in point, nodding along with me. Teaching and learning went hand in hand after all and sometimes, by the way he looked at me, I wondered if he were beginning to understand me too. "Now so far none of us, neither myself, Tessai, Jinta and Ururu have managed to pin the yokai long enough to take down the entirety of a single unit. Yokai, Demons…" He brought his cane back down to the ground. "They're fast. Incredibly dangerous." He made a sweeping gesture in the general direction of the kids. "I want them to see how."

I was still trailing in the wind. "How?"

"How they are dangerous. Why we must be so careful." In the dimming light of day his covered eyes appeared almost colourless. "And why they, why any of us should simply trust you with their extermination."

Expression now confused and forthright, not careful and surveying, my brows furrowed at the bridge of my nose. That sounded very… final. We'd discussed this sure but it didn't make it any less weird to hear. All of me rebelled at the idea of being considered by him like this. If anything this was about teamwork. What would happen in the next hour would be used as a basis for further understanding of a menace incursion. My smile was anything but confident. "Urahara, I know that you could easily-"

"No I couldn't." He cut in before I could finish saying 'slay yokai with both hands tied behind your back'. The idea of being more capable than him at just about anything seemed laughable. Age and wisdom do not necessarily go hand in hand but this Einstein of a man, if he'd been honest with me, had dealt with true Demons before. Not just yokai. As such the speed of his reply was kind of odd.

Seeing me open my mouth he cut me off again. "We both know I can kill yokai Mai; that was never in question." His smile rooted me and I took a breath: he was making a point, some patience was due. "But I have never been able to finish the job. As you already know yokai are skilled at making fast get-aways. If we're lucky enough to arrive in time before they've made too much of a disaster, we've always been unable to follow them into their escape routes."

Okay, that was news. "Escape routes? They have escape routes?"

"Vanishing points. Access points. Points of divergence." The orange question marks popping in groups of three above my head must have been unquestionably visible considering the short laugh that came out of him. His gaze looked at me, his irises alight in an odd impression of being on fire; a crazy flux of pale greys, greens and browns that shimmered very briefly at the movement. "The yokai possess the ability to phase into our plane of existence through the in-between of realities. Where they come from however… it's still a matter I know nothing about."

My mind went in one direction.

The black and white world?

There was so much more to whatever the 'black and white world' was, apart from my lame naming, and what it actually pertained to. Whether it truly was black and white or if that was simply the only way my brain could interpret what I'd seen I didn't know. I'd barely scratched the surface. But it was there. And it was in me too. Like how I could feel the sadness, the pain, the sheer instinct, the echo of innocence and the haunting of what could have been from the internal descent within hollows lamenting in my skull I could also feel the pulse of demonic presence and their intent towards fear as they shifted from one plane to the next. They were anything but black and white.

But was that the in-between?

I wasn't looking at him exactly, my gaze was distracted. "Are you sure they're simply shifting?"

"What do you mean?"

"You said…" Back peddling I looked at him. "You said they phase into our world, correct?" Head nod. "Through the in-between, which is more of a 'gap' between spaces and that you don't know where they originate from. Well what if they're simply moving between barriers? What if their world is simply lying… beneath ours?" What was I even saying? The information once again sprouting from my soul I was confused as to its meaning but the truth of it sang to me. "Like a thin layer, a wall between us and them. What if it's right there, just beyond reach?"

A hidden realm. Made hidden?

For a moment silence rained as Urahara simply looked at me, expression revealing nothing.

Yes, he'd explained to me how my reaction to the creatures and their subsequent behaviour towards me was unusual and quite possibly constructive to their demise. How my ability to sense them may be the only current available, reliable way of tracking these creatures. Regardless, Karakura was an epicentre of supernatural existence. I'd described it once as a fishbowl but now it felt more like an onion: Layers upon layers of secrets and life and the shadowed intent of personified malevolence to which those who reside in this side of the curtain should never have to bare witness.

It left room to ponder however if there should also be a gate to this allegorical wall? A door, with a lock and key? Or were Pei's books and TV series reruns simply playing havoc with my brain?

Finally he just said, "That's a very good question."

Blinking back into reality I caught the slightly knowing expression curving Urahara's brow line.

Hmm. "But is it the right question?"

I swear the side of his grin touched his upper cheek bone. "Is there ever a wrong one?"

Not. Helping. I sighed. "Urahara…"

"It's just… I find it intriguing that you can make such a swift supposition."

"It's what I see." I replied immediately, instinctively. "What I feel."

I had no evidence, for or to the contrary of my words except what I could feel about the situation. Feel THEM throbbing their nature, pulsing beneath the tide of reitsu and life energy on the earth I walk upon everyday.

There was no reason for Urahara to take what I say seriously and I didn't expect him to even remotely heed the words of a novice such as myself yet his words belied my thoughts. "Well if that's the case then I'll look into it."

"You'll look into it?" You'll just take what I say as golden and have at? Really?!

"Ah, don't look so surprised." His idle cane now once again against his shoulder he cocked his head sideways. "As I said, so far, except for you, we haven't managed to track them by use of reitsu. But the way they behave, the violence of it… things like that leave marks, imprints that we can't discern but maybe you can." He shrugged. "It's plausible."

If you say so. "Hm. Kay."

His smile seemed ever-present. "You have doubts?"

Pressing my lips together for a moment I grimaced. "Honestly? No. And that's the problem." Glancing back at Jinta and Ururu I exhaled at the dawning inevitable.

Urahara caught my look. "Just so you know they won't actually be participating. Just watching."

My brow arched. "Watching?"

His smile was almost depraved in its cheek. "You."

"Oh. Wait, what?"

"What, you honestly think that they would miss this?" By the eager quality to Jinta's expression I definitely got what he was referring to but…

My face did something strange; as if it couldn't decide whether to frown or look completely nonplussed. "Miss what? There's a very good chance that I'm going to get my ass handed to me." It was true: none of us knew what would happen, despite Urahara's good nature and my apparently accurate sense detection we were going into a situation possibly unprepared for the outcome, whatever it maybe.

Still… it didn't stop the unbelievably sharp spike of anticipation that I'd buried deep beneath an iron will of calm and a stubborn resolve to be good. To be a good, decent person who didn't find solace in the dark and the enterprises it promised. I shouldn't be rearing up for a fight, shouldn't be willing and more than raring to go forth but I was. Maybe it was simply the discovery but part of me knew (the rest declared a deaf ear against it) that I was being pulled forwards. As if there was no longer a choice to remain distant. The yokai could be seen as a horrific representation of hostility and shadows, of all things the majority of humans attempt to stay away from.

And I was… excited?

What on earth did that say about me exactly? I mean it was so contradictory to what I'd felt for them before, back at the fair grounds.

And of course it hits me… it's was all about potential victims.

"I believe in you."

I stared at Urahara.

"If anything I know you'll at least do the best you can!" And lo, with a sweep of his magically re-appearing fan joviality has returned!

Sighing and rubbing the back of my neck I smiled slightly. There was a blush too; a tiny one, really, and he saw it.

And chuckled. He swept a hand behind him, indicating the side door, the entrance to the parking lot. Shaking my head I stepped around him and walked towards it, reaching for the handle. "You guys ready for this?"

Urahara's voice came from somewhere to me left behind me. "We're right behind you."

Jinta and Ururu were hopefully right behind him with Tessai watching their six. My hand tightened round the metal handle.

Into the lair of the beast.

…Or something like that anyway right?

I pulled it open.

.

.

.

.

.

I was hunting.

The moment I hit the stairs after opening the door to the dim access stairway it started. It was sudden: the very instance my foot touched stone I'd immediately began to run. The flight of steps was steep but it was nothing; I raced down, I don't know how fast I moved, something inside of me demanding the speed. Whispered to me how close I was. A stain on the air telling me how close they were, closer, moving, tasting.

Searching to destroy.

To make bleed, make cry and scream-

Drain them all dry

It stopped me cold. Pausing two landings down I stared side-on at the exit door there. I could hear the others clamouring, could hear Kisuke's kimono flapping around him as he silently jumped down each flight. I kept my eyes on the door.

They were in there, some of them.

Yanking the metal lever down I shot out through the door like a cannon ball and into the darkness of one of the many levels of the parking garage. My footsteps hailed across the floor, light as rain, heavy as my intent –to sever- but almost as silent as a graveyard. The whole area was as silent as a tomb.

Except for one sound.

Like the clicking of mandibles, predatorily in rhythm and the drawn out sucking in of air. A single inhale. As if everything they accomplished was designed to instil the maximum amount of fear as they shuffled, scuttled, flitched and stalked about seeking whom they may devour.

Peter 5, verse 8. Why oh why was I thinking this now?

I would have swallowed. I would have frozen. I would have tasted bile were I a different Mai to the Mai of now; if I were the same Mai as the one that existed just one week ago.

I might even have fled.

It was in one long frame of vision that my pupils focused, latching onto the creature moving in the darkness beyond the tail ends of twined parked cars. Black skin, its body stood at my height, thin like a rake, skeletal limbs betraying visceral strength and savagery, covered in the natural gloom formed by enclosed stone walls.

It roared brazenly at me but I dashed at it without pausing. I locked eyes with it finding the yokai belligerently staring at me, the dirty red of its eyes scorching holes into me, through me, looking at my soul and I felt it breathe me in-

Wait, what?

The snarl ended without ending, declining into a harsh rumble and raising the hairs at the back of my neck. Its short, dark teeth retracting slightly as it followed my movements, probably waiting for the right time to strike. Its inhuman form hunched forwards, the obscenely protruding rib cage suggesting a toughened interior as if preparing to manoeuvre about me, possibly strike out with small claws that I already knew were far more formidable than they appeared. Its muscles noticeably quivered, head tilting, a grumble seeming to travel from its navel to its throat-

The pad of my right palm whammed hard and fast against its brutalized face as I dashed fast from the right and it howled harmonising with the crunch of bone and tissue. Head shooting backwards it granted me a single second to move before the second yokai who'd remained hidden between the cars came shrieking out into the cool air, jaw open wide, tooth and claw lashing outwards, the intent to hurt me blazing through my skull like a branding iron.

I didn't think about it, just let myself move, let those instincts Urahara said I possessed decide for me. I was almost surprised to find my left arm swerving round, hand punching hard and deep, penetrating into rough skin like it was sponge. My fingers and hand now dimly glowing green tore into muscle, pulling down, squeezing around something throbbing before ripping it back out with a squelch.

The whole time I stared into the eyes of desolation.

Desolation stared back; tepid, sickly red, confused as I was curious. It was sickening: I was curious.

The yellow glow of its eyes dimmed and I could feel it even now as it strived to sense my energy. I'd been wrong; I'd been so wrong about these creatures. They weren't soulless: quite the contrary. They were brand new.

But they were also abominations.

A pitiful sound escaped through those black teeth, like a keen, one filled with hunger and hostility. It didn't exactly inspire me to want to give it a hug or anything. As it melted and burnt like cinders, swept invisibly away into thin air I managed to finally look down at what I'd torn free of the creature.

My bloodied left hand held a heart in its grasp.

It… I…

I stared at it. A small panic began to seep into the back of my mind at how easy it was to be… acceptant with it.

For some reason the heart was still beating; the malignant dark of its energy flaring with each pulse.

I was well aware that the other yokai was still there, knew exactly where it stood but it wasn't moving. It was watching, not caring for the danger I posed and smelling the life within the heart in my hand, aching for it if the rough inhale of air had anything to say for it. Needing the mixture of reitsu and life energies held within.

Looking at the creature now the chill of its presence seemed so small in comparison to before. These yokai were dependant on what they fed on and Urahara had said they were cannibals. The idea was an insidious one but I had to be sure…

Slowly I stretched out my left arm offering the prize there.

Those eyes that seemed more fetid than supernatural latched onto the heart for several seconds. Its head moved in a slow, alien-like fashion as if the yokai sensed not only with its eyes but with its skin. My skin should be crawling. It regarded me, offering to it life and I felt the same brush of longing from it the hollows had previously exposed for me.

Approaching carefully as if expecting me to pull the gift away it bent its head. Opening its mouth wide it snatched the still beating organ into the discoloured pink of its mouth leaving a smear of red on my palm and bit down, blood dribbling down over its skin and down its body. I tried to quell my stomach as it churned. A wet gurgle emanated from somewhere in its body like a sigh of contentment and I felt its energy flare for the briefest moment, so small it was probably undetectable to most.

A part of me couldn't believe I'd just done that.

It had showed a remarkable trust, if it was even conscious or aware of such things that is. But… I had my doubts. Regardless of origin these yokai weren't supposed to be here. In fact they weren't by all rights meant to exist at all. Here or… there.

Maybe it didn't expect me to kill it. Or perhaps killing it and feeding it meant one and the same to the wretched creature. Before I realised it I began to feel pity swelling over my heart.

My reasoning was fed as I watched the yokai quickly change from satisfied customer to snarling, mindless fiend. It didn't see me crouch low.

Didn't see the energy pour from out of my hand in a faint hum of concentrated power, a thin layer of it forming straight a good metre ahead of the tips of my fingers.

Didn't expect its head to leave it shoulders so swiftly and fiercely as I swerved round him. Didn't even see it coming that it pondered briefly why the world was turning on its axis and why it could see its still form, standing and twitching. Why its level of vision was by its own feet.

And then it 'didn't' anything.

I stood there watching for a moment as it disappeared before tracing my eyes briefly over a silent Urahara and opened mouthed Jinta still standing over by the doorway. My feet took me over to the mid-height banister overlooking the floors remaining beneath us. The sloping lane of tarmac that cars would drive up or down indicated the levels remaining. There were three.

In the darkness below I felt them writhe, moving and searching.

The drop was pretty steep. Lifting my head I chewed on my lower lip, looking over to Kisuke.

"How far do you think I can fall?" I queried, one hand braced against cool stone.

He twirled his cane, tilting his head sideways. "Without injury? Not sure."

Hmm. I thought for a moment then, decided, nodded at him slowly. "Okay then."

The strangest, most patient and undisputedly dangerous guide on the face of the earth genuinely smiled at me for some reason from under the rim of his hat.

"Okay what?" Jinta frowned, head shooting from his master to me and then back again. "I don't get it. What are you-"

-Leaning the whole of my body weight on one arm I took a header off the wall.

"AHH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

Jinta's shout echoed throughout the noiseless parking lot as I fell feet first, my velocity creating wind that buffeted my hair and clothes. Carrying my weight completely balanced the tips of my toes tapped adroitly on the rim of the second lane down, pushing off immediately afterwards to break the length of my drop.

I rotated in a smooth, arching back tuck that ended with me landing lightly and softly, crouched on my feet three floors down.

In the heavy darkness of the bottom-most floor of the parking garage.

There were literally no lights down here.

No sound.

No movement.

But I could still feel them. How they kiss the edge of the spine. A roving dark side. Where were they now? Did they always do this? Hide? Or was I just mistaken in my senses?

Looking around now I saw that it was only at the far end of the garage that a solitary light remained lit; hazy and dim with the sunset but flickering infrequently. Note to maintenance: lack of lighting + creepy car park= perfect scene for a horror movie in which high school girls who kill yokai and hollows genuinely fear to tread.

Yes… well if Roundabouts bothered me it wouldn't be too much of a stretch to think that underground garages spooked me a little too as completely pathetic as that sounded.

Wait a minute… Was that a woman?

I blinked; there was in fact a woman standing there beneath the sole source of light. It seemed absurd that anyone would be there and it looked like she was fiddling with her car keys or something.

This was SO not the time for civilians to be out and about!

Crap! Pushing off from my crouch I sprinted over to her, eyes searching the darkness frantically for signs of movement but to no avail. What were they doing? Waiting again?

Closing in on her I wondered what I was even supposed to say right now. Something generic probably but my brain wouldn't come up with anything. If worse came to worse I'd have to force her to flee.

"Excuse me! Miss?!" Eyes fixed on her back, her bobbed brown hair and simple suit attire told me practically nothing about her.

Coming to a stand still just behind the woman, midway between opening my mouth again and raising an arm to touch her shoulder I paused.

…And took a large step back.

She wasn't a woman. For that matter I doubt she was even a she. I wasn't standing behind a human being. And it was something else I'd gotten entirely wrong; I was on a roll it seems.

It came to me gently, so contradictory to the situation. The yokai didn't always possess the dead. They didn't have to. That was something they did for one of two reasons: out of desperation to hide and erudition to achieve an augmentation in power. When these two where no longer the case the yokai, or even the demons, didn't possess anyone.

Many already beheld the ability to disguise themselves in human form.

They could look like us. And unless I was always on my guard I might never notice them.

Oh god. This was a problem.

Slowly, so slowly, the woman, the yokai in front of me turned, like it was proving my own point and stared at me side on. One dim red iris glared out of a female face as the sound of mandibles clicking emanated hungrily from its throat.

…A big problem.

I could see through the human façade now, concealing the monster within like a shadow mask. Soft, cream skin being drawn into the hard, black bone practically screaming beneath. Its mouth snapped open, teeth unsheathing and as dark as night it snarled in my face. Twisting fully round it lashed out at me, aiming to kill; face fully inhuman once again as the disguise morphed back into black, almost charred skin.

But its attack was useless: I was surprised at how little the effect of having a hungry monster launch itself at me frightened me. Maybe it was simply because I was more aware now. So I punched fast through its rounded chest, energy flaring and vibrant from my fist. It whirred and pulsed green before forcefully dissipating with a sharp, dense hum. I uncurled my fingers into an approximated claw and pulled my arm out of the cavity, stepping backwards.

Turning even before the body faded into nothing I noted how the one garage light in the vicinity had now conveniently blown. Oh good. I nodded, pressing my lips together: excellent. I so needed that. Scary oppressing darkness. Awesome. For it to be ten times more complicated than necessary. Super cool.

…Because as the light disappeared so did the positive feeling in my stomach that solitary yokai were all I would find in this place. Stragglers perhaps. Or maybe, just maybe, the yokai hunted in pairs or in lone units. But of course I knew better.

Yokai didn't hunt at all.

Yokai were led. They followed. They were dragged. They lived to serve their base instincts and desires. The need to feed. The compulsion for violence. The behest of their superiors etc.

Which is how I knew that I was already surrounded. The glow over my form was my only source of light.

"Hey!"

Exhaling I looked above me, one layer up, about 20 feet, to find Jinta's face peering moodily over a stone balustrade. Urahara was… er… Well Urahara was sitting on the wall next to the boy, legs swinging too and fro like he was a kid himself, hand perched on Ururu's head with Tessai looming behind him like a giant, silent automaton. It was difficult not to smile.

My entire body was being squashed between the contiguous energies of what I could only assume was a horde of yokai. The fact that I hadn't heard them appear, hadn't felt them arrive, that even Urahara couldn't detect with his crystal clear view from where he sat worried me slightly.

I should have realised. They existed in darkness: of course they could appear anywhere.

Jinta wasn't finished. "I thought this was going to be epic!" And appeared more than a little unimpressed. A piece of my soul fizzled out of existence from the side of my head. This is what I've been reduced to: entertainment for small boys. "Where are all the yokai already?!"

But then his boss spoke up quite calmly and I could feel his eyes though I couldn't see them. "Wait for it."

So maybe he did see.

A red brow twanged. Jinta squared a look at Urahara. "Huh? Wait for what?" His eyes shot to me.

I lifted a finger to my lips, the ubiquitous sign of silence and he fell short. I exhaled: here we go. Gradually I dimmed my energy down, forcing the low thrum pulse of it beneath the surface inviting darkness until it was all that remained. Though my eyes might as well have been closed I kept them open.

And I waited there; with each breath my energy beat an invisible pulse in every direction. It washed over them as they drew closer watching me in turn. Curious. Hungry. Excited. Expectant.

Just like me.

After about a minute of waiting the raised hairs on my arms from proximity sensing had my energy exploding upwards and out of me like a spiral. A pillar. It illuminated everything with waves of it crashing outwards lifting my hair off the back of my neck. The moment it did I saw them, revealed to me shockingly fast and brutal as hordes of yokai screamed in my face just feet away from me. On all sides they formed a circle caging me in. Claws, teeth, arms, legs and eyes were prepared for slaughter. My heart rate sped to unmanageable speeds as I stared at them.

And I smiled.

A slow spread of my lips. Eyes alight.

Teeth gradually revealed. Canines graced my bottom lip as the smile became something else entirely.

Heat expanded from my chest, coursing through my limbs and adding to the burn.

Anticipation blasted out from the tips of my fingers and toes. An extraordinary yet torturous sensation of freedom and relief managing to break apart my heart and lungs without shattering them into pieces. A gift and a punishment.

I really wanted this. With their energies focused on me I could tell that they did too. They just didn't understand it.

We are

They are cold, so cold. Without reason.

Desire your flesh

Hot. Fire and violence. Desire and magnificence.

Crave your SOUL

Hungry. They are so hungry. But it wasn't all physical hunger. I understood. Now I could understand.

And I could dare them to come at me. To get me. To break me and devour me. To grasp into the darkness for the light inside of me and claim the power for their own. To become more than what they are. To become almost human. To seek their own ends through me. I could dare them.

To try.

Come at me.

All of you.

Banking my energy I left the yokai a final trace of my smile. The threat of it. And the promise in it.

And for a moment I allowed myself to feel really… really… good.

This was going to hurt. And you see…

…Tonight I like pain.

It was in my blood.

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Just Above Her Head…

It was surreal the pitch darkness beneath them: too dark for a sunset.

They weren't that high up really. Just enough to glimpse the surrounding area. Just enough to pay attention, which was the main purpose for them being there. Intel. After a moment of reflection Urahara whispered, "Ah. We couldn't have done that."

"What? What is it? Why did she turn off the light?" Jinta asked, like Mai Li was a light bulb or something.

A shameless grin enveloped Kisuke's face but otherwise Jinta was suitably ignored as Tessai spoke up.

"But she's inviting danger."

"Mm. True." The shadow from Kisuke's hat covered the entirety of his face, this time leaving only a sliver skin of his jaw line visible. The darkness felt omnipresent. Closing in on them; more like a steel trap then the natural pending of night. "It's almost reckless."

Behind him Tessai was still as stone; there wasn't even the usual flash of light from his spectacles. As if the darkness had eaten it. "Almost?"

"It's in her best interests to invite violence." Though he couldn't see her his grey eyes were focused on the spot she'd been standing. "If you hadn't noticed already, the yokai aren't behaving like they usually do."

Petulantly folding his arms Jinta snorted. "You mean when she fed one of them a heart from their own kind?" Though he tried to sound valiant he merely ended up sounding grossed out.

Ururu tilted her head, looking to Kisuke.

He blinked at them over his fan. "What else was she supposed to do with the heart?"

Nonplussed, both children stared at him.

"I told you: her instinct is 100% more present than a normal human's. It's almost like a psychic power. From what I can guess she was trying to test something out. And she got her answer, whatever it was." He'd ask her about it afterwards.

"But why?"

Blinking Kisuke looked down at Ururu from his perch. "Hm?"

"Why is she like that?"

He smiled at her. "It's who she is. There are two parts to Mai Li that give her such potent, visceral impulses." He gestured the folded fan he'd been fiddling with down to the floor they were staring at. "One of those parts is the reason why she's currently standing in the dark waiting to be ravaged by a group of yokai that are, for the same reason, watching her in turn."

"And what is that part?" Jinta asked and for once it was more curious than hyperactive and moody.

Side on, Urahara stared at the young boy. His mouth, a line of darkness, seemed to curve into a grin. But he didn't respond.

As if on cue Mai's energy abruptly flared, brightly, blindingly forcing their eyes back towards her. Catapulting a mesmerising dagger of raw, tinted-green energy northwards the flux cast outwards about and around her graced the darkness with light and Jinta's gasp caught fearfully in his throat.

The faces of dozens of screaming yokai surrounded her, howling their violence and shrieking into the din of the parking garage, all similar shapes and sizes. Both he and Ururu winced at the din, the sound chilling their insides. The yellow glow of their eyes was the type that could smear fear into the fearless. The creatures stood at her level, claws, teeth and bone taut and aggravated. The noise was almost unbearable.

And then suddenly one of the faces splattered red, black and whatever disgusting mess of biology the yokai possessed.

But it was Mai's face that drew Jinta and Ururu's attention.

The girl was smiling.

And it wasn't a smile that they could respond to. But it would stick with them forever.

She looked so undeniably happy about something that you could almost miss the savage tilt to her mouth. Or how her unusually sharp canines were making a mess of her lip. Or at how she stared at the throng now dancing in combat like she promised pain. A lot of it. And how she seemed to like that idea.

Jinta shivered. Girls are weird.

Her focus was entirely on her enemy who was shrieking like a gruesome applause as the blood from another yokai squelched over its kin. They were all moving so fast together that the two children were forced to blink on occasion and they saw on the inside of their eyelids was streak of faint green energy. They'd glimpse a foot lashing out here, a balled fist there, a clawed hand scouring upwards and a flash of energy slicing down. All the while glowing red and yellow eyes gave the darkness an eerie light.

It was mesmerising.

"Wow." Jinta whispered. "It looks they're moving at warp speed."

"It's only because it's so dark down there now." Keisuke answered absent mindedly, his attention drawn down. "What you're seeing is the end result of every attack Mai uses."

A multitude of howls practically stung each of their eardrums and they winced.

"And the noise makes the whole thing appear so much more gruesome."

Ururu's small hands pressed against the stone rail she was peering over. "Will she be alright?"

Urahara responded with a smile. "Mah, she'll be fine." He placed a hand on the top of the girl's rounded head before looking back to the scene. "I think she's almost finished actually, which is good. There's something I want to see that's-"

Without warning the area around them lit up. Blinking Jinta, on automatic, pulled Ururu closer to him as he scoured the area. Tessai took a quick glance about him before stepped towards Urahara who was smiling. "Boss?"

"I think Mai just found the light switch."

Not literally but she'd managed to somehow diffuse the natural darker energy of the yokai with her own and lighten the place. The flickering light at the end of the garage was back on again and from above they could just glimpse the setting sun graze the horizon.

Below them she stood there looking at something they couldn't see. Embers of yokai were scattered all lover the place, disappearing into nothing. From the expansion and retraction of her chest she was obviously winded. Blood covered her hands and was splattered on her face.

"Have fun?" Urahara queried.

So entranced by whatever it was she was seeing she gave a start at the question. She looked over her shoulder at them and took a step towards them. "Are you all okay?"

"Are we okay?!" Jinta's face turned spastic. "We didn't even do anything!"

Mai looked kind of perplexed as to what she could do about that. "I'm sorry?"

"You better be sorry: you hogged everything! I was going to-" Tessai's giant hand enclosed over Jinta's face so you could only glimpse the red of his hair.

As Mai sweatdropped at the sight Urahara took over. "Did you get them all?"

She looked at him for a moment. "…No."

"What?"

"I didn't get them all. I got about two thirds of them before they scattered and…" She bit down on her lower lip, a lip she'd already punctured in her… enthusiasm, and scanned the area. "I don't know. It was like they jumped into black." She looked back up at him. "Like they escaped into nothing."

"Ah." Urahara moved out of his forward lean. "They phased. We can't get to them now. But it looks like you got most of them-"

"Why can't we?"

Pausing, the Shouten owner peered down once again. "What?"

"Over there, I can see it." Mai wasn't looking at him again she was staring out at the garage around her. "Where they passed through. I might be able to follow them."

"You think that's wise?"

She shook her head. "Not at all but I don't think I have an option."

"You could be stepping into yokai infested territory if it's a place that only they can travel through." Tessai spoke up having finally taken his hand off of a suffocating Jinta.

"But that's only if were making the assumption that this 'between space' is owned by them. If they're just passing through then they could make it back to wherever home is." She let that sink in for a second before finishing. "And then return in greater numbers."

Letting out a reluctant sound of acknowledgment the large man turned to his boss to find him already jumping down from his perch to where Mai stood.

With a hand keeping the hat on his head Kisuke landed neatly before looking at her. "So what do you suggest?"

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Mai

What do I suggest?

That was kind of serious… in that I have no clue. At all. Nothing. Zilch. Just a gut feeling that most would scoff at; I mean that's what happens on TV right? Someone comes up with a half-assed plan formed on one's own feelings and it sounds so ridiculous that maybe it's just possibly going to work? Hopefully?

Okay I was pulling at straws.

But even admitting that I could still feel where the yokai had disappeared on me.

It had been somewhere between literally snapping a yokai's ribcage in two and trouncing another into concrete that the rest of them had suddenly up and scarped. I'd only managed a quick look at what I thought was a few of them flitching into a, well, into darkness. An oscillating blackness; one that made it appear as if they'd disappeared amidst the layers between bricks, an area about the size of Tessai before I was completely alone. The area now smelled faintly burnt.

The blood in veins still thundered in my ears. My heart rate, while no longer fast was so incredibly strong I worried it might actually break through my chest. I hadn't blinked in about two minutes. I was overly alert, a little cold fear still infested in my stomach, infecting my nervous system and still, the urge to seek out the remaining yokai permeated my entire being.

Looking back to Urahara I caught him watching me. "This may sound a little stupid but I can feel where they went. I think I can go there and return in one piece."

"You think?"

"It has something to do with my energy. I think this is more to do with internal realisation than anything else. It's part physical. Maybe recognition…" I trailed off completely unaware of how I sounded like a loon because I knew that it was due to whatever I was that might allow me to move into that space anyway.

Kisuke just stood there. "I'm just going to pretend like I understand what you're saying."

Oops. I shifted, cheeks colouring slightly. "I've been there before. Only briefly; it was literally just a couple of seconds but I know what it felt like. Somehow I recognised a creature that I didn't know was yokai at the time and the force of the detection slammed me into this… this place."

"The black and white world."

I nodded. "Yes. It was more or less the same as the world we live in except how you perceive it. In black and white. It could conceal any person or creature that enters the space. Like a layer or buffer between dimensions. Like a timeless stratum."

His head tilted sideways. "And you think that's where they went?"

"Temporarily yes."

"Temporarily?"

"They wouldn't stay there. Not for long. The place is just a means to an end. A free highway of sorts. I want to reach them before they… return." To whatever home they possessed. "I think once they do I'll have no way of following them."

"And you think you can do this?"

It was a fair question and I mulled it over. "You said to me that Soul Reapers are able to make use of passage ways erected between the soul society and the world of the living by using a Hell Butterfly as an identification-card of sorts?" He nodded and gestured for me to continue. "I don't think I'll need that. Since I'm connected, er, to… to erm… to stuff?" Well done. "I think it'll be easy for me to just step into that space. I won't need permission. It already knows me. Recognition and transformation. I know it exists so I can do it."

It was so gratifying to not be stared at like I was a moron or to be ridiculed. Instead from Urahara I got the usual ever present joviality he couldn't seem to shed. "If you think you can then you should. Dive on in!" He scratched the back of his head. "And then come back and tell me about it."

I smiled and then laughed. "Sure."

I didn't need to pick a spot. Everywhere was the spot. The access points, for lack of a better word, for the yokai had closed up immediately behind them regardless of whether I could feel the pulse of their departure. That only told me that they'd been here in the first place. But I didn't need any of that. This black and white place was ubiquitous.

Shifting sideways I made to take a step in a random direction, wanting to see, wanting to find them and opening myself up to the environment and the haphazard energies already existing, infusing the air. Immediately I felt the colour pull away from me, felt myself move into another space. In-between.

In a blink I stood in an inert space of monochrome.

Well… I was in-between alright. But unlike the last time it wasn't black and white. It was grey. I suppose then I'd only been an outsider; someone looking in. This time I was well and truly inside the zone. Soooo… it wasn't the black and white place. Oh. I'd gotten used to that.

Zero sound existed here. There was only an odd thrumming in my ears, like a gentle wind, covering resonances that should have existed but didn't. It became a convoluted mix of nothing at all. Just a wind that existed in the ears only. As if the noise of the world was muffled. I took a deep breath and the simple sound of it echoed over my skin and everywhere else like a footstep in a hall of marble.

Moving round to look at Urahara I blinked at finding that he wasn't really there at all. Like a dark smudge of the figure of a man or an excessively blurred photograph. It was as if the sharp, obvious contours of my world had transformed into a mist that existed everywhere. I could tell who he was but only due to the distinct feel of his energy: he was like a mashed finger print. Though I was, had been (or still was) technically standing in an underground garage, this place had become a corridor of sorts. That tinge of a copperish sort that had been present previously had changed… as I looked around there would be a flash of green here, a touch of red there, in my peripheral, as if the space I stood in was… unwell in some way. As if it shouldn't be like this. Silent and just… there. Simply existing.

Diseased.

Not a flowing stream of life energy, the space between spaces that prevented worlds that should never merge from blending together… which was exactly what might be happening now come to think of it. The inequalities, the unbalancing of the hollow arrivals and some such.

Could a place be infected? A realm, a world?

And how was that even possible?

Come to think of it the place was also cool. Not refreshingly breezy but an ill cold. My breath could be seen as if winter where upon me. I wasn't shivering but it felt wrong.

Time here was irrelevant. And if time didn't exist here then it meant I was in a different phase of existence altogether which would explain why Urahara was only a smudge on a camera lens.

Perpetual stillness.

It would not be wise to stay here too long. I could already feel the shift and flow of energy between 'here' and 'there'. If I remained here in this corridor then I would either cease to be me or be swept away in a tide of oblivion that was everything and nothing. Though gradual the result would be permanent.

A tremor raced through me. But at least I knew now, for certain, that the yokai wouldn't stay here for long either. They were using it as a stepping stone. 'How' was another mystery.

A shadow point near to where I stood caught my attention. The area where I looked appeared distorted by darkness; a chunk desolate of light. It looked a little absurd just existing there amongst the vast expanse of grey eternity, holding its own man-sized shape… that was effectively shapeless. Like a fracture. Its circumference was shortening, a black hole… but one that led somewhere other than here. And the feelings that I got from it were as dark and incomprehensible as the portal itself. Strong too. And full of life of a sort which was strange to me. For black to be energetic. It showed that maybe the yokai weren't exactly phasing after all.

By the weak oscillations occurring in its epicentre I got the feeling that it wouldn't last very long.

Move it already Mai. Before I could second guess myself I stole my bravery, swallowed and walked purposefully into the blackness-

-My stomach rolled and my bones vibrated as the sensation of suddenly being pulled away swept over my skin, making me stumble. "What the hell?" My surroundings passed me by in a blur. I had no control. What was happening? I breathed in deeply through my nose in an effort to sustain equilibrium, pushing the momentary nausea away. Bent forwards, my eyes closed as the turbulence came to a stop.

Whoa, what have you gotten yourself into now Mai?

It was the temperature that made me still. The coolness surrounding me had vanished. It was warm here, but there was something odd about it. It didn't feel like natural warmth from the sun. It brushed against my skin; a frost swimming beneath the membrane of the heat. As if I was floating high through rain filled clouds on a hot summer's day. It should have been quite pleasant.

But it really wasn't.

This place was heavy with 'darkness', one that I could smell, clotting, thinly veiling the multitude of chaotic energies fluxing around me. Everywhere. A maliciousness and a heady, potent mix of primal, visceral intent; one clammy and intoxicated with fear.

I straightened, chest tightening, wanting to run. Face the music Mai; you're here now so you might as well. Licking my lips I opened my eyes and just stared. Frozen. Holy shit. This was just…

Colour. So much of it. Vibrant and RED.

It was such a massive change from monochrome that my breath caught. Everywhere I looked: COLOUR! There should have been a poster captioning the sheer detail of each shade as a selling point for the place. This place… it was like a mad, genius's portrait of a world only Fantasy could dream of. Fantasy with a boat load of darkness: a convoluted soup.

Roughly it was the same as the world I lived in on a regular basis. The garage I stood in had returned… sort of. The few cars themselves were there. The concrete. The pavement.

But God it wasn't. Not at all.

…Because the colour wasn't the only difference. This place was twisted like a psychopath's stoner dream. The garage roof was now non-existent. There was no need for artificial light so the odd hanging bulb I'd seen previously had dispersed into particles of black other. Shifting and melding into the surface of the world. Everything seemed to bend slightly against the reddish backdrop of a vivacious sky that actually felt dangerous; the setting sun like a slash of blood on the skyline. The brick walls, metal railings and doors moved. They shifted, retracting and expanding, changing from smooth solidity to a kind of infected sub-layer with bio-demonic matter. Dumbstruck and open mouthed I looked at the world around me.

Geez, this place breathed.

…Now that I think about it being brought here had felt like I'd been inhaled somewhere.

Natural law didn't seem to exist here. I had no idea what to expect. Just… fantastic. INFORMATION OVERLOAD. Completely out of my depth. Love it so much, I do, being alone and in danger.

It won't be me lying to say that for at least a second I wanted to turn around and find Ichigo standing there, ruffling his hair and telling me once again how stupid I am for being reckless. Sigh…

Curious (when was I not) and just, you know, slightly horrified and scared stupid I turned very slowly then gasped out loud like a moron. About where Urahara should have stood was a… a shade. Like a matchstick thin, flickering shadow of the man. Barely seen it phased in and out of existence. Like a reflection from another world. That's all. It was rather telling; this place (whatever it is) is more in-between than stand alone. It crossed dangerously close with the human world. I wouldn't have known who the shade was if I hadn't seen him stand there earlier. The others were there too; totally unrecognisable on a ledge above me that looked somewhat decrepit and covered with demonic growths like organ tissue compared to the previous cool stone of the garage ramps.

But of course since it's me here, my gasp must have let off some sort of supernatural, silent alarm because without any warning whatsoever it felt like the entire realm was staring at me with invisible eyes that I could feel on all sides. There was nowhere to hide. I made a face at myself: I just had to open my big mouth didn't I? The sheer power of this presence almost crushed me down, my breath coming out in staccato bursts fear.

'INTRUDER'

Er, w-what?

It was a voice so deep that it seemed to seep in through the very skin of this place, crawling up from the world around me: it was in the air, below my feet, buried in the soil and it percolated through my bones and into my mind. Feeling jumpy the hair on the back of my neck erupted in panic when I heard it again.

'WHERE ARE YOU'

So not telling. I gritted my teeth, heart thumping away like a jack hammer.

This voice was a loud and convoluted mix of voices and harmonies so obviously demonic I really couldn't deny where I was standing anymore. They rose together as one powerful rasp. For they are Legion…

And I was desert.

…You have got to be bloody kidding me. I wanted to smack myself with a stupid stick, as was appropriate action for one as stupid as I. I was an invader. The concept was completely understandable. I'd just appeared here, by myself (stupid, stupid, god, Ichigo was right about me), probably looking like some delectable, overgrown flee who can't shut her thoughts up for more than five seconds at any given time.

This realm felt like a giant organism: if something was happening in one part of it then the rest of the unit knew about it too.

This place…

It was the borderline of Demons.

'LIMBO'

As if answering my own thoughts the word appeared literally out of nowhere, forming in front of me against the brick wall, and defying the laws of physics, blazing bright and bold before dissolving to ash. "That's definitely new." I mumbled to myself. "Believe me; I wish I knew where I was too." But then another word materialised and the deep amalgamation of voices rattled.

And my heart just stopped.

'EVA'

My cautious frown disappeared, wiping away with any other display of emotion on my face.

EVA

Impossible.

It couldn't be…

My senses reached their shatter-point. Hearing it and seeing it written so boldly against the strange colour of this world shot through my spine like a bullet. For a single moment, as fragile as glass, I felt nothing. My mind was flung back to white oblivion, to a time I thought, hoped, prayed, begged had been completely and irrevocably sealed closed inside a black box under 100 feet of concrete called my Ego.

Eva…

I was in total shock.

…Because God, it couldn't be. They couldn't possibly know that. It was cultivated as a secret. Our secret. Mine and my…

"Eva?"

My chest constricted, breath strained. "No. No, no, no…" Not this. Not here.

My…

"What are you doing behind there? Are you hiding from daddy?"

…By my father.

It was shards of ice being rammed in my skull. It was hotness and coldness screaming through my subconscious. It was guilt, love, grief and undeniable pain incurring in a timeless loop. I cried out unable to help myself; my hands reaching up and burying fingers in my hair, scouring my scalp, trying to reconcile with memories best buried. There were too many paths this could lead too. I didn't want to see this. I didn't want to feel…

…He whispered and I followed his one long, pale index finger as it pressed slyly against his patient lips. "It's a secret, okay?" Then a surreptitious smile filled with love and pride spread like pure happiness across his jaw. "And secrets are hidden in plain sight. Mai Eva Li." His arms, so large and strong in memory curved around me, lifting me high off the floor. I buried myself into him, seeking security. "My little Eva. My life."

The solid ground beneath my feet where I stared was incomprehensible to me.

Daddy.

What's going on? What has any of this got to do with-

No.

Wait.

The air itself vibrating, pulling me violently from my internally schism. Blinking blankly and peering about me, watching with a briefly detached sense of self as creatures surfaced out of the cracks of darkness surrounding me.

A chill ran down my arms as limbs almost stroked out of those dark corners. The universe was a truly messed up place. Hollows, humans, yokai and demons, oh my.

…They certainly didn't look like yokai. Not all of them anyway. In a strange yet fitting way they reminded me of the wide variety of the unusually proportioned hollows. Like a motley crew of strange and twisted looking organisms. But demonic and far more creepy. My height or taller. Inhuman physique, unlike the yokai. Thinner, buffer, bigger. Different varieties of skin. Oddly shaped or lengthened features. Still whirling from my freak flash into the past making out their details with any kind of coherency was almost beyond me.

Some had what I think resembled cracked porcelain skin where the near-yokai blackness could be seen. Oddly it reminded me of the 'steam-punk' styled anime stuff Pei sometimes made me watch.

Whereas Hollows stumped, thumped, padded and stampeded across terrain these guys moved disturbingly like Marionettes, so completely unlike the yokai. Sauntering and shambling forwards, their motion was a rhythm that resonated with this world, which pulsated in the vein of an organ, a heart. I kept my fingers crossed but it was too much to hope that they hadn't appeared because of me, that the ominous voice of this place had said my clandestine middle name in welcome rather than as threat and inadvertently rather than calculatedly. Wouldn't that be nice? I could feel it coming off of them, the reek of iniquity focused intently on me.

It was so dark here.

Suddenly I wished for a weapon.

It was a nagging thought that hadn't left me. One that surfaced whenever I went to sleep or when I witnessed Ichigo in his soul reaper glory taking down hollows the correct way; with a zanpacto and not a clumsy debacle with his fists and feet. It was… an uncomfortable feeling. The way I fight… feels savage. And compared to the natural grace of a soul reaper, a style based very closely on the ways of the samurai in the Edo Era, it seemed wrong somehow. Or maybe this was more telling of my insecurities than anything else.

That I actually enjoyed using my hands? That I felt the almost kinaesthetic way I take pleasure in assimilating information, to touch, feel, gleam and absorb the contact, the violence was a little perverse?

…That I found it satisfying in the end?

Yet my hands still twitched in want of a weapon.

As one, the head of each creature twisted sharply in my direction. My stomach shot up to my throat and my mouth went dry. Most didn't have eyes. They wore faceless masks and it was chilling staring into them.

I bit my lip, eyes flickering from one shuffling demon to the next and took a step back. They kept moving. In a way you could compare them to white blood cells, appearing speedily to eradicate infection. In this case the infection would be me. Swell. And there were no portals of darkness here to take me back…

I really, really wanted a weapon. Preferably something that stretched beyond the scope of my own arm and didn't eat up my energy. Something sharp, deadly or extremely effective. All three would be ideal.

Deep within me, inside the dark half of my core, a whisper of an oath born of blood and soul broke through.

Pain.

A visceral snarl burst past my lips as the inner skin of my arms immediately opened up, white hot in flame. Teeth clenched, sweat appearing over my forehead, I peered down at both limbs all the while ignoring how I knew that all the lesser demons had not stopped in their tracks.

The skin of either forearm hadn't ignited. There was no sign of a fire. Instead the bright, white tinted green glow of my own energy pulsed in a thin, flickering stratum over my arms. I watched as it dissipated and an angry red line swiftly seared down my wrists, trailing a design before settling in the middle of each palm. To my disquiet the lines turned dark like black veins and then thickened. The pain abruptly stopped and I flexed my fingers trying to understand what I was seeing.

The dark marks looked exactly like the tattoo analogous thing that occasionally focused boldly on my back. My Ouroboros. I hadn't thought about it in quite a while so the idea of it being undeniably connected to my abilities was alarming.

My thoughts skidded to an irrefutable halt when my energy, super concentrated and, of its own volition, exploded out of my palms. The backlash of it slammed me backwards and into a wall that had appeared out of nowhere. It was a blinding light and my eyes squeezed reflexively closed. I felt the echo of my energy flare about me in a wave before something heavy and very solid abruptly weighed down each of my hands.

A sharp hum of concentrated energy rang from them.

No way. No way were they what I thought they were.

My fingers curled around the handle of each object, getting a feel for the cool weight before I opened my eyes. I tried, very hard, not to simultaneously grin like a lunatic and groan helplessly at how disturbingly fitting these weapons of mine are for me. But neither one was a sword, which was what I'd originally aimed, hoped for. I arched a slow brow; if there was anything I was expecting, it definitely wasn't this.

Guns.

They looked… they looked kind of like MI911's. There were pictures of them littered in some of the magazines Jihi buys.

Sleek; one pure black, one, I think, silver but it was so polished, glossy and gleaming that it was also white. Veins of my own green energy pulsed down their long barrels and each possessed curved handles. There was no safety, no ejection port, which meant no ammunition; just the trigger and the hammer. They each looked like they had a killer kick.

…There was a small, ambiguous mark on the side of each handle that I didn't have the time to make out. And there was a word carved into the outer side of each barrel: the silver/white, Mu, and the black, Sa. Latin. Not Japanese.

'Void' and 'Being'. Polar opposites. Hm.

STOP THE INVADER

What?! My head shot back up to stare wide eyed as many of the lesser demons simply disappeared, shooting away like shadows. Somehow I knew exactly where they'd pop up.

Like, right in front of me.

They were pretty fast for shuffling puppets of God knows what. Black ooze leaking out of dark skin, three of them lunged forwards from out of nowhere about two metres in front of me, all wielding what looked like chainsaw shape blades.

Luckily I'd felt them coming.

I reared back, body bending backwards at the waist and narrowly avoiding getting my head lobbed off. Adrenaline coursed through my system, hot and demanding and a snarl tore out of me. I twisted round and away, my leg coming up glowing as I turned with the movement and striking one of the creatures with the outer edge of my foot. Half its face practically flew off and I ducked round it, bringing my arms up instinctively with my fingers pressing against each trigger.

I gazed down the sight of my guns, the two remaining demonic beings standing directly in my view. I pulled both triggers. As if in slow motion I watched as the barrels rammed back and something bright and bullet shaped shot out. The guns jolted in my palms but it was the sound that got me.

It was nowhere near as loud as it should have been but loud enough to make me jump. There was a tone to each shot that sounded distinctly like my energy being fired off through the most tapered of channels. The whirr and whisper of it was a song that only my energy could make. And there were no bullets. I could feel it, see it and hear it; my energy fired as little glowing projectiles.

Time sped back up as I hit the mark; black and red splattering everywhere like a popped water balloon.

I frowned. Where yokai more or less melted away, these lesser demons shattered into shards. Jagged black and red pieces of demonic energy. Weird thing: I'm pretty sure I absorbed some of them. What was that about? As if magnetically attracted to me they were sucked into my body. Eyes blinking fast I peered down. What the-?! Worse thing? …It felt great. Invigorating, like a slim shot of strength.

Shit.

Right now however, like before, it wasn't the time for an internal crisis as good as I was at having them.

Whirling around I opened fire, blasting away in quick succession the remaining creatures before me. I had to keep moving because, obviously, these guys didn't remain still. How I had suddenly become so adept at firearms I didn't know, but as I swerved each attack I started to do things that shocked me.

Like… twirling the black gun, Sa, round, at speed, with one hand, whilst firing the other as I slid back and had the gun I was manoeuvring on my finger miraculously halt and target on a lesser demon behind me. Without looking. And blowing it to kingdom come.

Later on I'd realise that the fight didn't last as long as I thought it did. But the sound of the twin pistols, the shrieks of the yokai or the absolutely inhuman squawks, mumbles and shuffling from the demons, the q quick movements, their efforts to kill me and the thrumming pulse of sinister excitement this place was giving me were pounding away at my skull, blocking all else.

Yet it was the city itself, the environment that was my greatest adversary. I'd move to the side to have a wall appear or a ledge shrink.

And then the creatures themselves… they were altogether very different from the yokai. I'd realised earlier, like a fool, that yokai did in fact possess a soul. Albeit, each soul was only an unrecognisable fragment of its original, strengthening and mutating with each hunt and consummation of spirit and flesh, making them creatures of the most basic instincts. The lesser demons definitely had no soul. Zero soul, zilch sentience. They appeared artificial. Sustained by dark energy. Created by a superior demon maybe. The watchdogs of Limbo.

Swell.

But it told me they (the higher ups?) had no real clue as to where I was.

Well thank Christ for that.

Wiping my forehead I ran forwards and scouted the area, breathing in the acrid demonic leftovers and combing the place with my eyes. I needed a way out of here. Something told me I wasn't ready to face half the things that lived here. Moving further down what was previously the ground floor of the parking garage I started to hear whispers. Not human, not hollow, not demonic…

Other. New.

Calling to me.

There was no real intelligence to them: just murmurings of awareness. Of a presence. Ahead of me I saw a gap between two walls, like an alleyway popping up out of nowhere and the further I closed in the louder these murmurs became. There was an exit nearby.

Heart skittering and hope blooming I made to sprint the hell out of here when the extremely expected, irrevocably inevitable and forever warranted happened. It just had to, didn't it? Because my name is Mai and the Mai's of the universe didn't have it easy no matter where they were.

I felt a rumbling underneath.

Oh, come on…

Then right behind me, as in literally three metres beyond my posterior this humongous THING broke its way free from the concrete beneath my feet! Frozen mid-step I turned my head slowly round to meet this new terror and found my eyes widening, brows lifting into the bridge of my nose and mouth gradually opening in horror.

At least one car was knocked aside as a claw, one colossal in bulk, gripped deep into the concrete as five long, thick boned fingers broke free with the rising of a second claw. Grey-black skin was revealed as a demon, one lethally emanating violence through its aura and a devastating urge for freedom and greener pastures heaved its ridiculously massive torso out of the crater.

O-okay then.

The head, standing about six feet by itself, looked like an absurd and deeply disturbing cross between a human skull and an ape. It sniffed the air, looking far into the distance above me before, oh so slowly (trust me, slow or fast it's equally scary), tilting its large cranium downwards and setting eyes that looked and felt like stone upon me.

I gulped. Yes: me strong, me powerful, me not a tiny, inconsequential little person yup, yup…

Its face was… grotesque. Like someone had taken a cleaver to it for fun. The nose was completely absent; only a large open nasal cavity remained. There were deep scars covering almost every inch of visible skin. It snarled, revealing very large, oddly white, saliva coated, large, sharp and large teeth. Did I mention they were large and sharp?

Panicked sweat slid down my neck and I tell you, my jaw was so tightly clenched right now that I probably couldn't yelp if I wanted to-

"…KEY."

The word though a growl, was breathed through those erm, delightful looking teeth the demon, he, possessed and there was no movement to its lips.

"U-uh, w-what-"

"KEEEEEY!"

"OKAY, OKAY! 'KEY', FANTASTIC!" So I could yelp! God, I almost wet myself. I did what any normal (hah) person would do this freaked out. I legged it.

The sheer force of the resulting roar that tore free from the demon's oesophagus almost threw me clear off my feet. "GAK!" It didn't matter; I was out of here! Sayonara big guy! And when I wanted speed I could be damn fast. My running however didn't prove a decent deterrent for whatever this thing wanted.

"KEY! MINE!"

What key?! What did it want from me?

There was a deafening crack as the demon… Scavenger… broke loose of the confining concrete. Crap. Sprinting towards the close passage/alley way I lifted Mu in my left hand up and backwards, over my shoulder and I fired behind me three times. I heard each shot hit but by the sound of it not much damage was accomplished.

"RARGH-KEY! MY KEY NOW! MINE!"

Er, no? Honestly I think I was just pissing it off.

But there was no point engaging this enemy. By sense alone I could tell that it could and would do some very nasty things to me. Running was my only option. Through me it had sensed its escape from this purgatory. But I couldn't let it follow.

Sorry big guy…

As I bypassed the corner of the passage I glimpsed the black hovering mass: the portal home! Looking determinedly back at the charging demon I focused all of my energy to drive hard and fast through my arms to my fists. Planting my feet deep into the surreal well of gravity this world possessed I linked the fingers of each glowing hand together, as if in prayer before launching them at the forty foot wall beside me and hammering into its solid exterior. Cracks immediately appeared like vines all across its surface and with the thundering of the demon's steps, the sheer vibration brought the wall down upon it.

But I didn't look to see if I had succeeded in halting it. I was in three minds about this place. The human within me was unbelievably creeped out by, oh, everything. The other part of me where instinct was derived was neither thrown nor impressed with the place. It just knew that no one should have access to it and yet yokai were coming and going as if taking a stroll. The speedy way to places that should be secure but weren't. Something was wrong. Something was turning.

The hot part of me, the part that worshiped the play of weaponry, the dance of a fight, the sheer excitement and reward through violence, the part that enjoyed the colour red… was in thrall of Limbo.

It didn't matter right now however.

Before half the wall had even bevelled I was into the room with the portal and diving headfirst into it.

It was only then that I glimpsed a black terror shoot through a rather large crevice somewhere to my right. I twisted in mid-flight, bringing my guns up as I entered into the in-between. Obviously the fun never stops around here…

.

.

.

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Parking Garage

"WHOA!"

The car had flown, seemingly by itself into the wall next to where Jinta stood. Had been standing since he'd careened out of way just before it could turn him into Jinta coloured mush. "That's the third time that's happened!" He shouted as the 3 tonnes of metal crashed into brick.

Kisuke was just standing there waving his fan nonchalantly. "I told you not to stand there after I saved you the first time."

"Don't be so calm!" You could basically see the pissed off 'growl' in Jinta's throat break across his face in a series of ticks and throbs. "Two cars and that litter bin just up and threw themselves around. It's like someone was having a fight in here." He whirled round and pointed behind him. "And why did that brick wall crack?!"

It was true. Since Mai had vanished strange, supernatural (oh the irony), eerie things kept happening to their surroundings.

Cracks had appeared in the concrete quite suddenly and forcefully. Without any warning invisible forces had punched dents into cars and the odd, faint sound of a bang or a shriek had echoed through the darkening garage. Then quiet had rained over area. After about two minutes silence the floor beneath them had literally shook: bevelling and shuddering before relaxing. Relaxing. Like the concrete was sentient.

"Mah, Jinta you worry two much." Urahara, practically swaying with the breeze of his fan, simply smiled at his ward.

The boy grumbled, rolling his eyes. "Yeah and you don't worry at all."

Shrewd grey eyes peered down at the red head. "She's going to be just fine."

"Who Mai?" Jinta sniffed and pointedly turned to look elsewhere. "I'm not worried!"

"Of course not, my mistake." You could virtually hear the joviality.

Behind them Tessai shifted. "Still, we don't know how long this will take. It was risky letting her go at all."

"Letting her go?" Snapping his fan closed Kisuke looked politely bewildered at his friend. "I don't presume to think that I have that kind of power. Do you honestly think I could have stopped her if I wanted to?"

"Yes. Of course you could have." He answer was immediate and deadpan.

Kisuke laughed turning away. "Well you're right about that but…" He trailed off; his pensive stare aimed ahead of Jinta.

"But?" Tessai prompted, curious. Jinta watched furtively whilst Ururu showed no such signs of delicacy and openly stared.

"Trust. If I even tried to control her the trust that I've built with her so far will crumble into ashes. Besides I've never been much of a commander: I don't like ordering people into danger."

Jinta looked outraged. "You do it with us all the time!"

"That's because I'm here with you!" Kisuke replied with a grin. "But beyond that…" He looked at Tessai. "Mai's instincts are pretty much the real thing; I need to be able to rely on them. We all do. If they take her far away I have to trust that they'll bring her back to us."

Tessai grunted, moustache twitching. "And there's Ichigo."

A nod. "True. The resonance. Both of them are free agents, servants to none. And we need to keep them that way." Otherwise this war on their chessboard would be lost before it even climaxes. "I don't want them tied with the same fate that waits for us."

Tessai sighed but could only agree. Still… "It's naive to think that they won't eventually become burdened with our responsibilities."

"Yes, but I can hope." Kisuke replied. "I can wish. It's free after all."

Looking thoroughly confused now Jinta squinted at his Boss. "I don't get what are youYAHHH!"

He yelped and fell forwards as if pushed. Rolling out of the way he turned to gape at Mai who'd just appeared out of nowhere, seemingly flying backwards through the air. "Whoa!"

BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!

"ARE THOSE GUNS?!"

Sweating, teeth gritted, her arms levelled ahead of her at something only she could see Mai rapidly squeezed both triggers at her assailant as she soared backwards… not that they could see who it was. The bullets shot disappeared after four metres travel.

Halfway through a back flip to the floor Mai shouted out to them. "Get back!"

Jinta looked nonplussed. "From what? Hey-" But Urahara was already speeding him away with the others. "Boss!"

"Quiet."

It appeared so swiftly and abruptly they almost missed it.

Twisting in mid-air for a soft landing she was suddenly joined by a massive dark skinned horror. It skidded near to where she'd touched base in a crouch and they got a full frontal view of it as it turned round barring its darkened teeth. Over six feet tall, bipedal, thick musculature stressed the dark, inhuman skin. There was a smoking wound dripping red at its shoulder; an extremity the size of Jinta's torso. Said boy could only stare in dismay. I wouldn't fight that think with a rocket launcher!

And it certainly looked livid (though it was difficult to interpret emotion on a face as deformed and inhuman as this); it's dead red eyes glowing insanely in the darkened garage. Deadly curved claws were already set to strike it tore at the floor before leaping towards Mai.

A gasp from Ururu had Jinta shouting out from behind Urahara's kimono covered arm towards Mai's downturn form. "L-look out!"

But it turned out she didn't need any kind of prompting. It was already upon her, feeling the taste of sadistic triumph that was obvious by the stretch of its teeth when its spinal cord ruptured free with a shock of green from the skin of its back. It didn't move for several seconds; whatever intelligence it possessed was obviously trying to figure out why it not longer felt its extremities.

It wasn't until Mai yanked on the vertebra clutched in both her glowing hands, pulling it back through the puncture wound in its chest that it moved. Flinching, body arching, a rusty cackle of its mandibles croaked out of its mouth before it melted away as it fell backwards. It was gone before it hit the concrete.

Without further adieu Mai simply looked down at the unattached spinal bone before dropping it carelessly. It too simmered and flickered away. Then she let out a long exhale, looking ahead of her where the portal had stood. That had been a very close shave. Luckily it closed just after the assault-class yokai had thrown itself through it. Pursuing her through the in-between it had been relentless.

But it wasn't supposed to be here. It sealed its own fate.

Then again… it could have been Scavenger that followed her through the ravine. She brow twitched stupidly at herself. Hmm… yes it could have been much worse. Once again she glanced down at her fingers…

It had taken every bit of strength she had remaining to punch through its chest.

A cheerful clapping of hands broke her out of her conclusion with a blink.

"Bravo! Well done!" Clapping, Urahara walked forwards and smiled. "Very impressive. Incidentally…" He pointed at the different coloured guns grasped in each hand. "Something happened?"

The deadpan look he received from her, one that screamed 'dude: understatement' made him sweatdrop. "…You could say that." She muttered.

Lifting both guns he watched her brows furrow in concentration before a hum echoing from her hands, one that traced a shiver over him, had her weapons disappear back into her palms. It was then that he noticed the obvious black markings there. There was a swirl in the centre, one connected to an unusual trail that flowed up her wrist. They flared vividly for a moment before fading beneath her skin.

He frowned, nostalgia hitting him square in the chest.

She shook her fingers as if ridding herself of numbness. "Urahara."

"Hmm?"

"I've got a lot to tell you."

.

.

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.

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Mai

So I told him. Everything. Well… almost everything.

I told him that there was no black and white place: just a monochrome abyss. I informed him of the 'fact' that there exists a realm swimming just beneath our own with the neutral 'in-between' being the only thin venire of safety flanked by the two. Of the very real fear that this place that successfully kept the different worlds from barrelling into each other therefore preventing universal catastrophe… may be ill somehow. That this realm, this 'Limbo', was a traverse existing on the edge of the world of the living, the soul society, wherever the heck else and the inner world of Demon's. The kind of place that I knew, just knew I'd have nightmares about for weeks. Brillo. I explained the existence of lesser demons, creatures created as watchdogs in limbo. A place that was also home to rejected demonic swine such as Scavenger.

I walked him through the storyboard of how Limbo could literally talk to its inhabitants like a security program.

I also explained my recent discovery about the yokai: that they weren't soulless. That the reason why yokai seem to pop up following the destructive path of hollows and vice versa is the mix of energies each bring to the table that both species are attracted to.

"That's intriguing." Urahara muttered to me as we finally walked out of that side door outside. "We thought they turned up after a specific number of days but if you've said is true that means there's a good chance we missed occurrences."

I nodded. "It's possible that the one's you do know about were deliberate. And it could also mean that, considering that you didn't actually know about it, that the yokai don't always pop up to feed nor are they always sent to destroy."

"What do you mean?"

I looked up at the evening sky, watching as the stars slowly began to reappear. "There's a possibility they were sent as scouts. Maybe they're looking for something."

"Or maybe…" Hearing his voice I looked over at Urahara who too was staring at the night sky. "They're scoping out the world of the living. There is also the chance that they're distracting us from something."

"Or maybe it's a test."

"Testing us?"

His comment made me stare at him with a raised a brow. "I don't think we've made nuisances of ourselves quite yet. And that's assuming that they have a caste system that gives five shades about this world." I mulled it over for a few moments. "Maybe it's the soul reapers they're testing."

Though it was Kisuke who spoke I could feel four sets of stares aimed at my head. "What makes you say that?"

I blinked. "From what you told me soul reapers would have a modicum of difficulty sensing yokai or demons. And it would be near impossible if they decided to cloak themselves." Within the in-between. "They don't have spiritual pressure. Though their peculiar energy possesses similar qualities to hollows and they both feed off souls, they do so for differing reasons. They have an altogether dissimilar feel to them. For one thing their physical forms can be seen by regular humans. I can imagine their weaknesses and strengths are in antipathy with each other."

"The perfect enemy for shinigami." True. But I couldn't tell whether Tessai looked perturbed since the glint of his glasses cloaked his eyes and his tone was quite passive.

"There are better enemies to fit that role." I blinked at Urahara but he only exhaled. "As troubling as it is, it isn't as if we haven't thought of this as a possibility before."

I agreed. "And most of what we've suspected is still just speculation." Back to ground zero.

Then, with trepidation, I explained about how I'd mysteriously absorbed demonic shards. His reply was less than helpful.

"What did it taste like?"

I looked at him as if he'd grown a second head. "Bu-uh, what?" Was that really relevant? "Well, since I didn't actually eat them I would know." Daft man.

"Mm." Habitually fiddling with the hat on his head Urahara appeared thoughtful. "It's… a little peculiar to say the least. I'll have to do some research. The only thing I could possibly surmise about it is that it might have something to do with dominance."

"As in 'post defeat supremacy'?"

"Or, it's possible you produce a natural energy field that magnetises loose demonic particles. Like a planet's gravitational pull. Then again with how concentrated your energy is it could have left you simply ravenous, so you devour more energy to gratify yourself."

"…Oh. Good." Make me sound like a hollow why don't you.

"Other than that I haven't a clue."

So I slumped, lip twitching. Typical. "Thought you'd say that."

"But on that note there is something I need to tell you."

Frowning, I looked at him. There was something off about his tone. He sounded… cautious. Careful. And not a little compassionate. It made me clench involuntarily. "What is it?"

Ooooouuuuurrrrrrrrrrhhhhh!

A hollow? Now?

Oh. I nodded to myself, remembering my recent epiphany. Yep: Hollows following yokai and vice versa. My eyes flickered towards Urahara who, like the others, had heard the haunting cry but was obviously less than impressed with it.

"Sorry." I gestured ahead of me to where the hollows were about to appear. "Can I deal with this?" At least then Ichigo wouldn't have to… and it meant I could try my new guns on them.

Urahara shrugged. "If you'd like."

Sweet. I moved away, standing far from the group. Didn't want to deafen the kids: Jinta would never let me hear the end of it.

Thump, thump, thump, thump-

Their white armoured skin glowed pale and evanescent in the night. Well, I glow too. Lashing my arms outwards my guns reappeared in my palms with a hum. For once I wouldn't be using my fists to fight… maybe my feet though. I aimed, sighting down both barrels at the pounding beasts at my door.

You will go gentle…

I pulled both triggers.

They worked! The trunk of a tusk blew soundly off a white mask but the bullet didn't clear straight through. It took three shots to do that. The second hollow reminded me slightly of a tractor (huh?) but I didn't get a chance to look at it properly when, on instinct, I blew clear through an ankle and, as it stumbled, let rip down into its head.

But I had to swerve to avoid the gigantic fist aimed to turn me into glowing goo. Quickly swinging back round I stomped down hard on the slowly retracting hand and leapt into the air, my energy rippling through the bone-like-skin until it cracked, shattered and scalded. Kisuke said my energy was raw and it must have been; steam literally rose up from the limb. Twisting in mid-air I aimed Sa and Mu at the least armoured area of the hollow: the back of the skull.

Two shots and it was over.

Letting out an exhale I smiled at myself like a goofy little idiot. Quick, clean, efficient. How… not like me. Odd. Still, with that silly look on my face I gave a half shrug. Something had to give eventually. I mean, I enjoy fist-a-cuffs like there's no tomorrow but sometimes it tires you out. Disengaging my weapons I made to continue my conversation with Kisuke but it was at that obscenely perfect moment that my phone decided to ring. Er… Brows furrowing I pulled out my mobile and glanced at the caller ID. Unknown number. I gave Kisuke a pleading look, not for an instant forgetting his unusual vigilance. "Can you continue to hold that thought please?" He nodded amicably, both of us silently admitting to the other that this conversation was just on halt.

"Hello?"

"Mai, what are you doing?"

I blinked. "Rukia?" How did she get my number? I made to arch an inquisitive brow at Urahara but then realised. Oh. Ichigo. Of course. I bit my lip: I should have given it to her myself. Sorry friend. "What is it?"

"You're outside?"

"Ah…" I actually looked about me. For I am doofus. "Yes I am."

"I knew it was you." Exasperation coloured her tone.

I didn't get it, I thought, shaking my head. "Rukia you're not making a lot of sense."

"We got a page, warning the arrival of a few hollows popping up somewhere within the business district. We were just about to go when the signal disappeared. It was you right?" Her tone was ever knowing and still annoyed.

Eyes flickering down to my left I arched a sole brow. Wondering what it was I'd done wrong I nodded. "Well, yes I-"

"Rukia, give me the phone."

My single raised brow fell down in an instant. Ichigo. Uh-oh. Don't remember the tickle, don't remember the tickle, don't sodding blush either!

"She's fine Ichigo; I can handle this!"

What to do, what to do…

"Like hell you can! Just give me the phone already!"

"No! I'm doing the talking here!"

"Give it!"

Ooookay. Don't mind me; I'm just standing here, chilling out. Hah, wigging out.

"Rukia, for the last time- no, don't hide in my closet!"

The shout had me jerking the phone away from my ear. I blinked sweatdropping, noticing the bemused stares from the quadruple before me. Urahara gave me subtle a 'what's going on' stare and I responded with a general 'Ichigo and Rukia are engaging in verbal affairs' expression. He pressed his lips together and hid whichever expression he wore behind his fan. Probably a smile.

Straining to hear I brought the phone closer Ichigo hissed at Rukia. "If we don't stop shouting my dad's gonna hear and then you absolutely won't be able to stay in my closet anymore!" That seemed to seal the deal. I heard the ex-soul reaper sigh a 'fine'. Resigned to my soon to be reprimand (because Ichigo never missed a chance to explain clearly and concisely how stupid I could be) I brought the cell back to my ear.

Don't think about the tickle.

"Mai? You there?" Immediately I flushed.

Great. Just perfect. And why did he sound so calm when I looked like a strawberry? He sounded completely normal and a little quiet as if he was trying to keep the rest of his family, who I assumed were downstairs, from hearing him.

Maybe it was just me… maybe I'd over-reacted. No, you know what? I hadn't over-reacted. I'd 'Mai' reacted. He'd completely capsized me by tickling me like that. Yet at the same time… he'd taught me something new. It had been… fun. Mortifying, yes, exposing, absolutely… but nevertheless fun.

But I won't deny, as I worry my lower lip, that him seemingly unbothered by the whole thing made me feel a little insecure. Then again maybe he was. Maybe he too was embarrassed. Maybe guys react to things like this with indifference. He could be a little shy-

"Mai?! I know you're there dammit!"

Or maybe not.

Let it go Mai.

Honestly after what I'd been through I was just happy to hear his voice. Though he couldn't see it a small smile turned the corners of my mouth. "Yeah, I'm here." Hi.

"Are you alright?"

I lowered my gaze to the pavement, puzzled. Am I alright? That… that wasn't what I had been expecting him to say exactly. "Erm, I'm doing alright." Speaking slowly, my brows furrowed and my eyes flickered again to where Kisuke stood as if he could explain the behaviour of my favourite orange headed friend. The rejoining expression he gave me made me feel more of a doofus than ever. As if he'd actually know. Then, like the clumpiest tool in the toolbox, I realised what it was Kurosaki was aiming for. Oh…

God Mai, you're an idiot. If you can't say it aloud, say it in your head. He… cared. Remember? It was so warming.

Feeling clumsy and thoughtless I closed my eyes and finally spoke. "I'm not hurt."

"That's good." I heard his release of breath before continuing. This time I noticed how his voice grew steelier and steelier as he spoke. But with the whisper of his low voice it came across more comically manic than annoyed or angry. "Now that we've got that out of the way, maybe you can tell me what the hell you're doing?"

And there comes the rub. I winced. Taking a breath I shifted, lifting my free hand uselessly in search of an expression. "I was…" When nothing popped up I trailed off, staring ahead of me, eyes unblinking.

Oh my God, it wasn't coming! Where was my clever excuse, my easy flowing lies?

I'd… Had I lost my ability to fabricate?! To Ichigo! Because of him?! Why was it always Ichigo? It was just a glitch, it had to be. A fluke? Something had to come to mind, it had too!

My silence had gone on a moment too long. "Uh-huh." He burred. "That's fascinating." The measured drawl that Ichigo practically breathed drew a small, red sweep of embarrassment up to my cheeks. 'You was'. Awesome."

My mouth was open and totally gormless. Kind of shell-shocked the muscle below my eye twanged as my eyes raked over the building we'd just exited, then at Tessai and the gang, back at the floor before returning to my mobile.

I cleared my throat, attempting blasé. "W-would you excuse me for a moment Ichigo?"

Surprise laced his tone. "What? Why-Hey don't leave!"

I floundered. "Wha-I'm not!" Crap!

"Where are you going?"

"Nowhere." Oh, well done Captain Fantastic.

"Then why do I need to excuse you?"

"Because I-I'm just… I…" When did he get so imperative?

"You're just looking for a decent cover story, that's what." He interrupted. "You're not excused!"

God, I've actually started sweating. "Just give me a sec, please!" I shot Kisuke a beseeching scream of an expression: help me, what do I say! Could I actually tell Ichigo about the demons without dragging him into it?

And golly, look at that: said genius scientist and enigmatic engineer looked completely stumped. His fan hung pretty pathetically from one hand as the other scratched his suddenly empty skull, pupils the size of pinpricks. Oh Good. Since it was such a great time to draw a blank and all.

"No way!" Kurosaki's voice rang clear through the phone, the mouthpiece of which I now had covered over with both my hands. "Hey, I'm talking to you! Don't you dare-"

I jumped and shoved the phone back to my ear again. "I'm here!"

"Seriously, I'm half a leg out the window already!"

He what? "Ah, why?"

"Why not?" I could practically see him perched halfway out of some non-existent window with a scowl tied to his face and a question mark. Probably thinking why I was so weird.

"Er…" I gave up, slumping on the spot. "Okay, I honestly have no idea how to respond to that."

His sigh reverberated down the line. "You don't need to keep hiding things anymore. We know about you. You know about us. If you're doing something risky you should tell us; we could back you up. And even if you're not you could share it anyway."

"…Why?"

"Isn't it better that way? To share it with people you can trust? If you do trust us… that is…" He trailed off slowly.

For a moment I stared out into the night. No… How could he not know the answer to that? Phone to my ear I bit my lip anxiously. Had I not… Had I not made that clear? Had I never really given them reason to believe I trusted them, trusted him with anything? At the thought my chest constricted. If they didn't think I trusted them then they could never trust me. And maybe my sudden difficulty with lying to Ichigo made more sense now. How he'd seen me laugh earlier, without restraint. How I felt released slightly from something within me. I wanted to share, to remain connected. Pei was one thing but…

My tone softened with realisation as I murmured down the line. "Of course I trust you."

He didn't say anything in reply and I knew it was because he was waiting for me to do exactly that, to trust him with something, anything. Glancing insouciantly at the group I'd travelled with I sweatdropped to find all four of them camping out in the middle of the sidewalk, a large picnic cloth on the under them as they ate from bento's and sandwiches pulled out from god knows where. Brows raised high and meeting in the middle I nodded figuring 'hey, why not'?

"Mai?"

Putting a hand in my pocket as I leaned casually against a railing. "I was testing… my new weapons." I finally said with a quick grin, feeling a secret excitement about sharing this with him.

"New weapons?" I could hear the surprised blink of his eyes in his words.

"Yes."

"You have new weapons? Other than your fists? Not that it isn't cool to be able to kill a hollow with your fingers though it is a little weird…" He continued nonchalantly but I heard Rukia jeer at him in the background, 'I thought you were all annoyed that you could not do anything without your zanpacto'? You were all: 'how is that fair'? 'I want to do that too!' She crassly imitated through her nose.

"RUKIA! SHU-" There was a not so feminine 'shush you idiot' before he continued, more quietly than before but just as steamed. "Shut up! Who asked you?"

"I was doing it for Mai!"

Their concurrent hissing sounded like a pair of snakes were doing battle. "She doesn't need you to! And I wasn't calling her! I've already told her that I think it's kind of impressive!" He spat. "It's just also kind of strange, that's all! Hey don't hit me you imp!"

If I could have face planted with some grace I would have. Instead I could only stare about me, not 100% sure what I was supposed to be currently doing except listening. In passing I gave Urahara my awkward half shrug when he blinked over at me, a rather filled looking sandwich protruding out of his mouth, held by both his hands before listening once again to my arguing friends. It's not like Ichigo's the only one who thought that my being able to defeat hollows with my hands was, if anything, politely absurd…

I was almost smiling when they returned from their bout, almost comfortable against the hard rail my backside sat on. And it was always surprising how indifferent Kurosaki sounded even after having argued with the girl who lived in his closet. "So you got new powers huh?"

It was absolutely natural to assume my new weapons were now abilities born from the capabilities of my energy. "Yes, I did."

"Since when?"

"Since tonight."

"Oh… did something trigger it off?"

Whoa. Spot on. I opened my mouth, closed it, and then opened it again. "…You could say that."

"What was it?"

A boat load of fear and panic against creatures of darkness? "It doesn't matter now." Shaking my head, I licked my lips remembering how I'd, for a moment, wished he'd been there, if anything for moral support. "I really am okay now." I smiled again as if he could see the consolidation in it and know that all was well.

"Right." Underneath the sarcasm I heard a boat load of annoyance spring free and had no idea what to do. He saved me anyway. "What are they then?"

I felt like a child. Enthusiasm coursed through me as I readied to explain it to him. "Ready for this?"

"Yeah, come on, give it to me."

My eyes were probably as bright as my smile. "They're guns." Guns! Who'd have thought? "I have two guns." Two. Could he tell I was happy?

There was a hushed gasp in the background. "G-guns?"

"Guns!"

"Cool!"

Yay! He said cool. "Thank you!" I beamed like an idiot.

"Wait. Wait a minute…"

Er… "What is it? Is something wrong?"

"That…" He seemed to be struggling with something.

I pressed him, concerned. "Is something wrong?"

"That's… that is so not fair!"

I blinked. "Er, it isn't?" Why not?

"NO, it isn't!" Whingeing didn't quite sound like whingeing from Ichigo: the growing Prince of hot-heads. He sounded genuinely upset at the apparent unfairness of the situation. Therefore an unsightly nervous yet genuine laugh from me was imminent. "You get guns?!"

"Apparently so." I tried not to sound amused, I really did.

"Are you kidding me?!"

I shook my head cheerfully. "Nope."

"Aw, man! That IS so not fair! How come?!"

Oh the irony. He thought guns were cool but I still wanted a sword, regardless of how much I already loved Sa and Mu.

"I've never heard of this before." Rukia added, curiosity infecting each word like a disease. "No one at the soul society uses guns as a weapon."

"Who cares if you've heard of it or not?! That's actually cool! Way better than my oversized zanpacto!"

Oversized zanpacto? Is it?

"Oversized? I thought you liked the fact that your sword is like a brick?"

"Hell no! W-wait, a brick? I never said it was like a brick! You think it looks like a brick?"

Tact, Rukia. Get some.

"Well… it is kind of… massive. Structurally speaking."

Okay, so don't get any tact. It wouldn't suit you anyway.

"Say what?!" Even high-pitched, his tone was still very male.I… liked it. It continuously made me smile. It was becoming familiar.

"And zanpacto are cool!" Rukia shouted in defence.

"Says the epitome of uncool!"

"Ichigo your zanpacto is as big as it is because your spiritual outlet is unbelievable." I was trying to help. Whether or not I was succeeding was another matter. It really worried me that he might actually see his zanpacto as a bit of a laughingstock. There could be nothing farther from the truth both factually and figuratively. 'It' and 'he' were far from ridiculous. "Zanpacto's size, I've been informed, are a direct representation of the control of one's energy. Of course it's going to be huge."

Silence.

"…So that's why it's as big as a house? Because I can't control my spirit energy? I didn't even know I had to in the first place!"

"Well that's what Urahara told me. Didn't-" Puzzled, I frowned, reaching out. "Rukia didn't you explain all this to him?"

She sounded severely irked as she, I assumed, butted Ichigo away from the phone. "I did!" Then, reluctantly, she grumbled onwards. "Okay, well I tried to but he was not exactly affable or agreeable at the time."

"EXCUSE ME?!" He was back. "What part of 'Ichigo, it is now your duty to become a soul reaper because I screwed up like a total noob and now you have to pay the price for it', explained anything about my zanpacto?!"

"I am not a noob! I happen to be a high qualified soul reaper!"

"High qualified my ass! You never explain anything! You just stand there all lofty-"

"-You never ask me too! You're lucky it was me they sent to Karakura and not some third rate, squad 11, barrack cleaning idiot!"

"Lucky?!"

Blowing breath through puffed cheeks I stood there, counting the stars. It was a long time before the two cooled down enough for me to get a word in edge ways.

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Chiyu's Onsen

It was sickening. Well and truly sickening.

Chop, chop, chop, chop, chop.

Children should not have to see their parents like this. Wrong didn't cover it.

Peering over the front of the couch from where she sat Pei's dark eyes narrowed in on the couple behind the kitchen counter. From behind her the light from the television illuminated her dark hair, giving it a blue halo.

Chop-chop, chop, chop, chop-slice.

There her parents stood, innocently chopping vegetables. Nothing to see here. Move along. Or at least they had been harmlessly dicing vegetables for the stew that would star in the following evening's dinner. Her mother had already taken care of the noodles and somewhere between the carrots and the leeks her father had appeared from out of nowhere to silently slip in from behind his wife as she worked.

From there he'd proceeded to kiss and nuzzle his wife's neck. So swallowing a shudder Pei tried hard not ignore the toxic feeling of 'ugh' threatening to spew up the dinner she'd stuffed into her mouth almost an hour before. They were cuddling and everything!

But it wasn't until the singing started that Pei felt well and truly within the malaise zone.

"Heart and soul, I fell in love with you. Heart and soul…"

Dad… just… shut up! Stop the evil!

"Madly! Because you held me tight and stole a kiss in the night-"

Mom! "ALRIGHT! STOP THE SINGING, STOP THE- STOP EVERYTHING! JUST STOP IT!"

In unison they blinked over at her. "Why Pei, didn't you know how you were born?" Jihi queried over Chiyu's shoulder with a slow, knowing grin at the sight of his daughter's discomfort.

A disgusted shiver wracked Pei's form. "Yes dad! It was a stalk! A beautiful stalk dropped me off on your doorstep! And that's it! Nothing else!" Let me find peace in this delusion! She twisted round with a flump and tried, earnestly to concentrate on the film she'd flickered over to.

Still she could hear her father chuckle at her and ignored the temptation to hurl the remote at him. Sheesh, where's Mai already?

As if the god's themselves were answering her, the faint jingle of keys could be heard from the front of the house and Mai's voice spoke up as she slammed the door closed.

"Hello! Sorry I'm so late!"

Pei whipped around, staring at the open entryway to the living room for Mai to make an appearance. Their conversation a couple of hours ago had been far from forgotten and she wondered whether there would be a continuation…

As the girl came into view Jihi pranced from where he'd been entwined with his wife and Pei sweatdropped at the arrival of sparkles in his eyes. "There she is!" He sang. "We were getting worried…" But trailed off as he a good look at her, the sparkles loosing their lustre and his blonde hair falling flat with crease of his concern. "Mai you look…"

"Mm?" Mai hummed, looking at him softly. She appeared rosy with success, maybe from a triumphant battle with tarmac. Her hands made short work of her now messy pony tail. She snapped the bobble onto her wrist.

When Jihi flinched at the sound a small frown worked its way on Pei's face.

"Erm, Pei said you'd been for a run?" He intoned, with an attempt at a regular expression. But his eyes kept flickering to her navel. Pei could see why.

A light sheen of sweat covered every inch of skin that could be seen. There was the odd smear of dirt on her hands, as if she'd fallen forwards onto to some grass and lower down there was a few odd stains on her black t-shirt that the man could tell, though the t-shirt was too dark to indicate the exact colour… wasn't dirt.

Her eyes were bright and her smile, real. "Yes, yes I was. It was er… it was pretty good. I feel great!" Mai's smile as her eyes flickered habitually over to her made Pei grin in return. It was just such an honest one. "And I'm really, really hungry!" She admittedly somewhat bashfully as if she's surprised herself by admitting it.

…But there was something altogether off about her appearance that contended with her healthy image. Something… strange. She was different somehow.

Maybe that was why Pei could glimpse that sliver flash of knowing in her fathers. A knowing followed by something quite cold. It made the airways in Pei's lungs feel heavy. This was another secret wasn't it? Something to do with Mai, but not something Mai knew about.

Of course she doesn't, she thought as she watched her sister practically fly past her unusually silent mother and towards the fridge. She's oblivious. Pei stood up from the sofa and walked towards her, watching as the girl pried a bowl the size of a chicken, filled with cold salad and potatoes from the second the last of the colder shelves. I'm not an idiot; she wasn't running tonight. The bowl was joined by a tray of leftover pork dumplings. She must have used up a lot of energy, Pei surmised, a smirk growing on her face. If I was in the mood there are so many jokes I could touch about that…

A tub of cous cous, yesterday's soup and soba noodles were dumped unceremoniously on the kitchen island.

Er… A little between curious and outright alarmed Pei directed an amused glance at her parents as Mai dived for the… is that pie? She wondered, her eyebrows rising.

Mai more or less inhaled half a slice on the spot. Whoa, hungry much? Her fingers sticky from the syrupy goodness of blackcurrant and apple pie the brunette hip-checked the fridge door close and leaned her head against it, eyes closed. Chewing she released a deep breath and swallowed. "God, that's delicious." She practically moaned the words, setting her prize down and digging into the dumplings with relish.

Pei couldn't hold it in any more. "Hungry are you?" She asked with faux indifference, her face tight from her valiant effort to keep from giggling.

Mai blinked up at her, a half eaten dumpling held between her fingers. Pei gestured down with a smug expression, her right index finger pointing at the buffet before her. Mai followed the finger and looked endearingly lost for a moment. Noticing the silent stares of her aunt and uncle she licked her lips, eyes flickering down and back up between everyone. After a single moment self conscious debate she simply shook her head, deciding on something. "I'm sorry; normally I'd be far more refined but I'm just so into this and the whole thing tastes divine."

Hearing the inelegant snort tare out of Pei, Mai allowed herself a small smile. It settled into peaceful rapture as she prepared to finish her dumplings.

A fork appeared in her view, snatching away one of the remaining dumplings. "Mine!" Pei chimed.

Mai didn't even stir from her feast. "Help yourself." The salad was sumptuous and her stomach was far from satisfied. Urahara had warned her about the sudden rise in her appetite after strenuous use of her energy but it literally felt as if there was a whole in her stomach. Pig manners at the dinner table were the last thing she was concerned about.

Mouth filled with meat Pei leaned over the table across from her. "Seriously though; why the mega hunger?"

Well… Mai knew the answer to that. And it was one she couldn't share. "Burned a lot of calories." She muttered, tearing open the lid on the cous cous and digging in.

"Hm…"

That sound again. Pausing, she took a brief look at Pei. There was nothing indicating… well, anything really. But still…

Rrrrrrwwlll… Stomach calling, think later.

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Ignored by the pair Jihi stood in the shadowed archway with Chiyu who stood with her arms folded by the wall.

She watched her girls: the daughter by blood and the daughter by choice laughing over leftovers, chomping with the bare minimum of table manners. And it should have been serene.

Slowly, her brown eyes flickered to the side, to her husbands face. Her lips pressed together reflexively.

It was fixedly hostile and was like looking into the face of an old friend.

A lock of red hair fell against her cheek as Chiyu's head touched the wall behind her. It's been a while…

His expression was pure stone: dark and immovable. The normally gentle sea she saw in his light blue irises was shards of ice and any indication of age that could be glimpsed as laugh line at the corners of each eye were nonexistent. A haze of black covered over his forehead, shadowing his expression.

To say he was menacing wouldn't be stretching it.

There was no reasoning with him like this. "Honey?" Didn't mean she wouldn't try. "Jihi-"

"I told him I'd kill him." His voice was barely a whisper but the rough quality beneath made her shiver. "I told him if he ever forced it before the right time that I'd murder him." His eyes never strayed from the girls.

Chiyu was silent for a moment. "We don't know for sure that it's him. She's been changing for a while now."

"It was too early; something set it off."

"And you assume it's him?" She queried, sighing when she noticed his taught fists. "We couldn't calculate every eventuality." Her voice was measured, aimed to force logic into her husband's temper.

The problem was that Jihi's temper didn't burn hot.

It was a slow freeze. The build up held analogies to the image of the gradual flow of molten lava. He rarely lost his temper. In fact he rarely lost control on any form. It was why Pei had such a hard time forcing true annoyance from her father. Why he was so suitable to the roll jackass and idiot father.

It was easy.

If he were ever to loose a modicum of self-control it would be as a direct result of practically any occurrence involving his daughters.

However, duty and sentiment never mixed well. So when it came to Mai… the mask came off.

"Not with her." He murmured suddenly and Chiyu blinked suddenly at the sound of his voice.

Her mind flickered back to her question. "We tried…"

"It's too soon. I was an idiot to bring us back here."

Her eyes rose at him. "If I remember clearly Jihi, you weren't the only one involved in the making of that decision."

It didn't do any good. "It's my job to protect this family." He shook his head. "Bringing her here was inviting the wheel to start turning."

A sigh blew free from her. "We knew coming here would cause something to happen."

His reply was certain and immediate. "But never this soon."

"We wanted so much for a peaceful end that we forgot just exactly who she is. It may be time to remember Jihi."

For a long moment He stared at his wife; the conflict in his eyes made her ache.

"It isn't for us to decide." She said quietly.

"But it should be. We may not be her parents but we're as close as." There was a low rumble in his throat that spoke of a certain shopkeepers soon to be wakeup call. "He just has to meddle."

The expression on Chiyu's face was stern. "If it's him."

He eyed her side on as he turned back to the girls. "I can feel it Chiyu, this has Kisuke Urahara written all over it."

He could never trust that man. Not once had he been able to gleam what he was thinking.

But…

Though he knew it was naive to even consider a future without turmoil, if his family could remain as content as they were now he would gladly throw himself on his proverbial sword. He and Chiyu had made their own choices in life. Had made them and had stuck with them. Had never regretted a single one. But in the end it was the children of all that eventually pay the price. Isn't that always the way?

Closing his eyes he shook his head. "It's too late in the day to worry about this." He muttered, heading out towards the back door of their home.

For now at least, he just wanted a fucking smoke.

"Jihi…"

He turned back to his wife, blonde hair swishing and almost covering is vision. Need a haircut. Something sailed towards him and he caught it before it could poke one of his eyes out, looking down at the packet. He blinked then peered up at the love of his life.

She smirked. "It might have been a while but I can still anticipate your cravings."

His body glowed at her words. A slow smirk of his own pushing away the edge of his anger as his eyes skimmed down over her body, slowing at parts. "You've always been good at that."

Her eyes rolled.

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I was nowhere…

Nowhere is where?

Everywhere. Today. Tomorrow. Yesterday. Someday. Once.

Existence is both void and full. Everything and nothing. Cold and warm, alive and dead, remembered, forgotten…

I mattered but not me.

And I was lost. Here amongst the remnants of history. Past becomes the present. Present to befall the past. The young and the old, the wanted and the discarded. Rendered from bone and husk to the sea of souls. The tide of memories, my own and yours. Back. Back to then. And back to how. Back to that.

Back to why…

Who.

But in the end I am ME. And ME is ancient. New born. Free. Chained. Weak, strong. Disburse their dream. And I am… accident. Accident of design. A plan unmade before the wheel turned. Balance paying its due.

It was the natural response to the silent keen of the column…

The existence of cold earth appearing suddenly beneath my feet made me jolt in my sleep.

My eyes were closed and I could feel the untamed wind sweep hair free from my shoulders. The ground rumbled; I felt the vibrations travel through me. I knew without sight that I wasn't anywhere I'd previously been before. I knew I was sleeping. I remembered climbing into bed after brushing my teeth, stuffed to the brim.

But where was I now? Where had my visions taken me this time?

A thrum of energy spread away from me like a wave, cracking the terrain and echoing like thunder. I opened my eyes and trembled.

Cataclysm

The soul word that appeared in my brain seemed to describe this place well. Lightening flashed across the sky, cackling overhead. It spread to a crimson horizon crying tears of fire. I stood in a bloodstained field that held no greenery. My energy was the only light to be seen. It illuminated the world…

There were bodies everywhere. Black robes and red armour. These I recognised form previous dreams. They lay still and cold, slashed from head to toe.

They should have known better. Their cause had been pointless. An aspiration to powers beyond their own. So used to the worship granted by the young race of humanity they'd found cracks in the armour of their allies, weaknesses disguised as strengths. It had been used as the ultimate excuse to betray one another.

And like with the previous cycle war had inevitably broken forth.

A grief and enormous instinctive wisdom that I couldn't possibly hope to grasp forced my voice into action, speaking words I didn't know, in a tongue I'd never heard before and shouldn't have understood but did.

It has happened again

This sadness was all encompassing. I was drowning.

I did not remember as I do no now

I did not feel as I do now

The howl of many have fractured the flow of the balance

Is it my fate to bring about such jealousy?

I spoke as myself but I was not myself. I am Judgement.

Such pain befitting an eternity of existence

I am Repentance.

For I am existence

I will always be verve. Life in every breath and movement. The flux in genetics. The flower of an evolved people. And at each turn they'd turned around and betrayed themselves to lust for power.

Is existence… wrong? Fated to forever rebirth itself from ash?

In betraying themselves they betrayed me. They turned to a source that was never meant to be touched as a weapon. A tool used to rise and rise again, touched by wants and greed and possibility.

Though I possess government of life I am not entitled to rule over it

I do not seek ruler ship

I do not seek to change

I do not seek to take

I have no wish to decide fate

To challenge what life has become is not my cause

My cause is to maintain the existence of existence

To protect life

To protect life. To make right my disease. The result of a cycle of bloodshed they created because I…

Because of my existence

I shine too brightly. A shine too bright brings green to the souls of those who aspire. The weak and the strong become one in the race for dominance. Yet without me what would life be?

But I was not always 'I'

'I' was once 'this'. 'I' happened in plea. It is for humans that I happened. For their future I seek healing. But memory is vast.

When I was young they came to make me theirs

My keepers, the others, let them

The guardians showed them the way. They should not have gotten involved. They should have remained sleeping, blissful in their ignorance.

They should not have attempted to govern me

I woke to the sound of pre-dawn rain.

Remaining still, I stared in a daze at the ceiling. What the hell had that been? A vision… of the past? That wasn't the usual… Normally past visions occur to portend future events. What could be coming that would require such a vision? I didn't even understand what I'd glimpsed. The multitude of emotion and words I understood only while sleeping confused me. And I didn't even remember parts of it; the whole thing became unlearn the moment I awoke.

…But it… made a strange sort of sense… deep in the recesses of my soul.

It had been about the past. About something far beyond me. It existed elsewhere, in a different time and place. Though it was removed from the now, about people places and things not of my world… though I'd seen things that I had played no part in…

I pushed myself upwards, a hand leaning against my mattress as the other ruffled my hair.

…I think maybe it had been about me.

Author's Note

So very quickly now!

I had an anxiety attack which prevented me from doing anything at all, never mind writing a story. But I'm back and erm, please don't kill me!

Also, if any of you noticed I pilfered something from dmc: it's an amazing game with references to great scholars and works of art. I give full credit to the game and not me for its creation. But this story is not a crossover: we're not going to suddenly have characters from the game appear here (…unless someone makes a great case for why they should).

Please review… and be kind.